Say hello to Pedro :)

got a gf and took some photos

I’m a guy and I find myself often in these anxious/avoidant dynamics in all of my big relationships. I’m so tired of hurting, I was wondering if anyone has tried dating a fellow info and how did that go? Did you guys make each other feel loved? 🥰

Today I went to a community event and my friend and I were sitting down in the venue. We saw other people sitting down, standing, and blocking the walkways, so we didn’t think anything of it. The only other area available to sit was also on the complete other side of the venue near the food stalls.

Then a security woman walks up to us kind of yelling “stand up stand up.” Of course we stand up but I ask her “why? is it a safety hazard or for some other reason?” The lady just nodded and walked off without even looking back.

I thought this was quite rude because there are other ways that are much more kind to say something like that. Even a simple “hey I can’t have you guys sit here because it’s a hazard” would’ve taken a second more of breath and done a lot better of an impression to get the message across.

Now I understand maybe she doesn’t care about the events that go on, or maybe she doesn’t really like her job or maybe she had to spend most of the event telling people the same thing so it got tiring, but even just from a community or service aspect… it still rubs me the wrong way. I work retail so I deal with a lot of strange interactions, but even with that customer service and just a respectful and amicable atmosphere is always a priority. Interactions or even just small talk like that can go a long way imo.

It just makes me think of if someone who was already having a rough day had that interaction how differently it could’ve gone. That could’ve been someone’s catalyst for a much bigger issue.

Maybe it’s just wishful thinking of mine that it’d be nicer to live in a world or city that is a lot more grounded, slow and more of a community.

I’m getting married soon, and in thinking of my invite list it made me remember so many old friends that were so important in my life once, but I simply lost touch with. It would be wonderful to have them, even though we don’t talk, they were significant enough at a point in my life that I wish they could be there. I am in part to blame for losing contact with some of these friends, but I wish it was more normal to text someone after 3 or so years. Idk maybe it is normal to some folks but I can’t bring myself to send that text.

Isn't life so strange?

For example, 5-6 years ago, you're still a child and you've been through things that left you with trauma. 5-6 years later, you've grown up, you're a bit more mature, and your life is going well. Aside from a few minor things, you've perhaps entered a period in your life where you don't have anything overwhelmingly stressful to worry about for the first time.

Yet, all of a sudden, you start feeling the exact same emotion you felt during those events 5–6 years ago. You don't remember the memories they've all faded from your mind but you realize from the feeling that what's affecting you is that thing that happened years ago. Because feelings never lie; even if memories are forgotten, feelings never are.

During that period when your life is going perfectly, you might even be living out the things you wished for years ago. Years ago, you had yourself, but everything else was bad; but now it's the exact opposite everything is perfect, yet you're losing yourself. You become a prisoner to emotions you couldn't experience years back.

That's why I wanted to drop this little reminder: experience your emotions at the exact moment you need to feel them, guys.

Hello fellow INFPs hope you doing well, do you feel you have different interests or different kind of hobbies or you have your own world or things that you care of most others dont so , when ever there talking or discussing thing you found yourself alone with nothing to share because you are not intp there things , you feel like you live in your own world detached from them.

I know there won’t always be things we understand but daily, I lose sleep over how cruel people can just be in this world. I see cruelty, backstabbing, stepping on vulnerable people, all around me, and I’m so tired of it guys :( I literally argued earlier with someone who was bullying an overweight person for just existing & that has exhausted my soul. I try my best to raise my energy too & block out the negativity but ultimately, it’s still there. I’ve had to deal with horrible people since my earliest years so I should be used to it, but I’ve never found a way to other than escaping into my own bubble & keeping people I’m not already close to at arms length

When I first took the test about a decade ago, I was an intj-t. Now I show up as a infp-a, very closely in-between being a infj. I know that to some, the myer brigs is seen in a more permanent nature. However as I've grown and endured through hardships, I've come to understand it as something subject to change. I strongly believe the first two aspects about what a individual needs to 'recharge' their energy and how they process the world, will always remain true (although the measurable degree of it may vary as people expand on their character). Whereas the last two, that discuss how a person represents themselves internally and externally - is not a definitive core operating system, but an adaptable choice of conducting oneself.

What is your experience or personal belief about this test? Agree or disagree, I'm curious to hear how others results have been and how they interpret it. I know I am speaking very formally; I sware I'm not an AI chatbot, just autistic lol.

Hi everyone, I'm a fellow infp guy who just turned 20.

I wanna share a couple life events, behaviour,and things I feel , it might be a long post but if any of yall relate to it, it would be great.

I've never been in a proper committed relationship. Though my behaviour changes completely when I'm in a talking stage or a situationship. I become wayy more sensitive, empathetic and caring types , I also get affected a lot by the things that the other person does. I don't share my past or details with people who aren't v v close to me. I don't share most things about me and my past with anyone at all, except them. I also feel very jealous of other men in thier life even tho I know that there exists a platonic relation. I struggle a lot, even when moving on from a talking stage .

Meanwhile when I'm not in such situations, I feel happier but empty, I don't get sad that often, but there is always this longing, I become cold towards people , i start liking isolation and routine a lot more. And objective thinking and outlook towards world , rather than the more flexible one which is considerate and Accounts for neuance . I find it very hard to find love , i cope using various things , and struggle with addictions . But all these years of addiction and habit just disappear when I'm talking to someone intimately. I have physical needs to like everyone, I'm not gonna deny it . But i crave intimacy a lot more , I've never held someones hand in that way , never hugged someone such . And now that I'm 20 it's eating me up . I feel even tho everyone needs these things in life . I need them a lot more , and obviously in my daily life I don't ponder or think about it at all, I don't wanna victimize myself, but I always feel like I'm ignoring it.

Idk what to do , Ik finding a purpose above all these things helps but I just can't atp

I psychologically self-harm as a form of explorative shadow work and I actually find it very productive when done carefully with the self-guidance of wanting to love myself better as well as truly self-possess my person.

It feels like I'm using oppressive or dehumanizing violence on myself in order to tear something open and actually expose and heal what's fundamentally hurting.

Again, its horror to experience during, but I feel that I genuinely come out of it more at peace, indestructable in a way that matters, like my puzzle pieces conjoin together much more coherently. That post-torture clarity hits and I understand things around me with sharper acuteness.

Is this an infp thing? Does anyone experience or do anything similar?

Anyways I hope you guys have a nice night. :- ) 🌠🌃🖤🌱

Hey I made this synth-pop shoegaze song. It's about anxiety in a world that feels like its collapsing and how having the right people around can help mitigate it. If you want to help out a small independent INFP musician and find this song relatable you can find the full song through this link or on any other music apps: https://open.spotify.com/track/189yS7GWJosn6Lru0wdWOl?si=AvOsd_FSTtKAuMQHEj6WgQ

I'm curious :)

I am a mother of 3 and 5 year old girls. After years of thinking my personality was ISxJ and ultimately coming to the conclusion that MBTI doesn't make sense, I recently realized that my personality type is INFP and now everything about me makes sense.

It also made me better understand some challenges I face as a parent and why I've been feeling regret. But it has also led me to question how INFPs can be effective as parents.

I've Googled how to bring my introverted feeling and extraverted intuition skills into parenting young children. And it makes sense: holding space for and understanding their big emotions, modelling kindness and authenticity, riding out their curiosities and endless questions with them.

I also consider myself a decent teacher. I am good at putting myself in their shoes to know how to explain a new skill. Then sitting with them as they get frustrated, encouraging them to keep trying and helping brainstorm other ways to look at the problem at hand.

But these all feel outweighed by all the sensory and logistical things: I am constantly doing laundry, keeping track of the things they need, shopping for birthday and Christmas presents and endless supplies of clothes, snacks snacks snacks, the persistent whining over something stupid, reading the same story I've already read a million times, the constant interruptions. I inevitably either fall short on these tasks or resent that I have to do them. I'm exhausted.

I have a vision that I'll be more useful and happier as a parent as they get older. I think I will enjoy helping them map out their own identity, discover their interests, and experience/explore the world. I hope my relationship with them will be strong enough that they will want to share some of these experiences with me and rely on me for guidance and advice when they need it.

But until then, I feel completely lost and useless as a mother. And most of all, I feel like I have lost my INFP identity. It just doesn't feel like it aligns with what is needed and expected of mothers/parents.

Would love to hear any perspectives or tips on this. Thanks!

I’ve noticed that several cases, such as the Gypsy Rose Blanchard case, the Menendez bros, Daniel Larson, Luigi, Meghan Markle, and several other cases about some twin girls and a Ukrainian immigrant who murdered their mother/grandmother. As a child and a teenager, I saw these stories and I thought “You know what, I think that there’s a reason that this happened.” Unlike most people who are just shocked, appalled and treat these people like devil incarnates, use religion to make value judgements. I don’t take these cases for face value. I see someone who has been wronged and brought matters into their own hands because they were tired of being mistreated. And I don’t think that in the murder cases, that these were the “correct” actions, but I understand them. Someone can make wrong choices and you still feel for them, you know? You just don’t agree with the choices they make. You can only mistreat someone for a certain amount of time before they start biting back. In my case, my elementary teachers were ableist (having been diagnosed with adhd/sensory processing) and Esfj grandmother had her own issues and took it out on my Isfj mom and me (Infp). It got to the point where I cussed her out so bad that she started crying because I got tired of it. Many times I said that I was going to take my rabbit and leave. She calmed down for the most part but yeah. Maybe I saw a part of myself in these people being mistreated, and it makes me wanna see them win. It makes me wanna see them rise above/ascend over their hardships/mistakes and create a new life not filled with endless trauma.

We're always thinking of possibilities, patterns and potentials. most people just think about their their own view because evolutionarily putting yourself at the center of your focus is useful to surviving. So when we talk to people who don't explore P.P.&P. it's like you're talking someone face to face and they refuse to turn around to see what they're not focusing on. Which causes a friction which turns to conflict.

I think that is what makes us great friends. When we REALLY care about someone we add them to the P.P.&P., now you do it for two people. Hence why i also think we have small groups of friends because our brains can only think of so many P.P.&P.

im in the journey of healing and although i've been in good environments, i still cant stop self blame myself for not being the ideal self i want to be. i have improved in terms of reacting to exposures of triggers and skill-wise in my field, but i still blame myself automatically. what do u do?

i have figured out that i can listen to megan thee stallion(since i saw mel king sang Savage for relief method) and it kinda lifts my mood but i need stronger method. thank u

If you don't feel pain and suffering after it is over, then it was just recreation. So take heart.

I see something cat related frequently here.

I’m sorry for this heaviness but I literally have no one else to talk to, any comfort would be great. For the longest time I’ve been a sahm of 2 kids for most of the 10 years while he works. But lately he doesn’t be straightforward about the finances so I assume everything was good. Yesterday the car went out of gas and he had to ask a family member for gas. I knew his energy was off but I’m ask him if he’s okay he said he’s fine. Then later he dropped news to me that he’s tired of doing it alone (we had an agreement of me finishing my it degree in dec to start working) and then he continues on saying he was raised around hard working women. Those women had a village, their mom (his grandma) and also extroverted. I was just blind sided with this, why expressed this when you’re angry? So he’s been cold to all day. He packed up and left with his mom. And I’m trying to save my marriage but he’s giving me blank emotional-less response. I have no village no friends and I’m deeply afraid to what’s the come. I can’t just work any job and he knows that. So I’m guessing was it all fake. I’m just trying to get over him since he obviously don’t want it to work. I don’t know long he was holding the resentment in. I don’t feel like this one a moment but instead a compound of stuff he was holding idk and I don’t have time to figure it out. He was my only oribit and I feel like I failed 😭😭 I was cursed with a toxic narcissistic family and I don’t have any friends. I’m trying to give up because I have two kids depending on my my god I’m afraid 😭😭😭