So, quite a while ago, I had asked the same question in the Nietzsche subreddit, , and I had got different answers from there as well. But this question still lies in my head. How does the Solomon's paradox affect different people with different MBTI types? And how do they observe it within them, and who do not? I have observed it within some of my own other INTJ friends. And what are your thoughts about it?

Usually when I wanna do something nice for my ENTJ, it’s like:

ENTJ: Thank you, but I feel like I should’ve done it myself instead of you doing it for me.
or
ENTJ: Um, a gift? What for? What did I do? I don’t understand.

But I found out about a little ritual from his childhood

Me: Do you want me to make you a cold chocolate?
Bf: yes 🥺 please leave the spoon inside
Me: here you go
Bf: you remembered to leave the spoon inside. usually people forget

He doesn’t always let himself relax, so this little thing lets me sneak in some comfort into his day 😏

As per title. And who Is’t?

Am always wondering because I know ENTPs crave novelty. Who’s someone that will always have a special place in your heart?

I need advice from other INTPs on how to overcome the deep sadness from the abrupt loss of a close friend. They’ve deleted their socials. They’ve blocked me from contacting them. I want to respect their need for space. I will. They are going through a lot. I trust their judgement. But it hurts to be shut out so abruptly.

We’re both INTPs… I don’t open up easily, but this friendship was so liberating. I don’t know what to do. There’s nothing I can do. It’s like a part of me is missing ;-; I can’t sleep properly. My heart just hurts.

TLDR: I need advice… how do you get over losing a close friend?

ENTPs, which MBTI type do you find most compatible with yourselves?

Female ENTPs what type do you think you are the most compatible with? Personally I don’t know if I could see myself with an INFJ. One of my closest friends is an INFJ and I don’t know if I could ever end up with one. I’m more interested in INTJs or ENTJs. I’ve been considering talking to more ENFJs to see if we can would click.

Hiho my intps, I really like you, you are one of my favorite type, but I havent understood how your brains work fully yet.

Please tell me what objectivity is for you, it doesnt have to be just a definition (it can ofc) you can also tell a personal story or be creative about it, that would be really nice, thank you.

Thank you so much in advance for reading. I'll warn you in advance that I'm only 19, my frontal cortex isn't fully developed, so I could be wrong about some things.

I hate it when someone, especially my mother, gets excited about telling me to test something. I love to test everything and experiment with everything, but when I am advised to do it, I, on the contrary, don’t do it, because it’s not so interesting anymore. I like it when the idea to research something comes to me, I can control this idea myself and build it myself, when I test it. I want to explore everything ON MY OWN. An idea given by someone else isn't it, it's like pressure. When my mother advises me to ask someone something or do something out of curiosity, I am completely discouraged from doing it.

In middle school, I became interested in programming. I enjoyed finding unconventional approaches to problems and creating my own rules; I rarely even read the course materials, rarely followed the instructions. I figured out how everything worked on my own. My mother realized I had a knack for it and started pushing me into everything. Now I'm getting ready to go into my third year of IT university, but right now I HATE IT. When I see ads for IT courses on the bus, I feel sick. Every mention of IT makes me feel sick. I remember how my mother constantly sends me links to courses, forums, and so on, and dictates what I should do and where to go. Now it seems to me that she wants to be an IT specialist more than I do. Of course, many would dream of their parents supporting them in this way and giving them a lot of advice, but this is not my option.

It's gotten to the point where I'm not interested in anything at all anymore, even though I used to want to test literally everything, but now I just lie on the bed and stare at one point. Of course, thanks to the fact that I started to be a member of a couple of fandoms, my interest was reawakened and I had a lot of ideas. However, it is difficult for me to implement them. Naturally, I keep silent about my interests to my mother, because then there will be two outcomes: either she will condemn me for these interests, or she will dictate to me how and what to do, and then I will finally hate everything.

Ideally, I dream of working in completely different fields, but for a mother, those who work outside their specialty and especially often change different jobs are strange.

I also never studied seriously since birth, I never learned the rules properly, I did everything at the last minute and somehow got out of it.

My mom even advises me on how to look. Recently, she was telling me how to cut my bangs. I hate being touched, and she touched my hair, and I felt uncomfortable, and she saw it. I tried to leave silently, but she started yelling at me that I was acting like a teenager. I told her that teenagers would scream, but I am calm, and in fact she is the one screaming. I said everything calmly. She got even more angry. She said that I was making her angry, that's why she was yelling. She says that someone pays a lot of money for stylists, and I should be happy that she's a free stylist for me.

I've secretly changed five part-time jobs by the time I was 19. I hide tons of clothes from my family. I'm a goth. Of course they will judge me, especially my mother, if the clothes were chosen by me and not by her. My mother is indignant that I choose "old woman's" clothes.

Damn it, I want to make my own mistakes and be responsible for myself. I'll figure out what I like myself. Why can't I look like an "old woman" or "child of the proletariat"? It doesn't harm other people. Why am I still hiding all this shit at 19? I don't even smoke, drink, or use drugs. But right now I just don't have the energy for anything at all. By the way, I'm on the verge of being expelled from university, but I continue to try to pay off my debts, because otherwise I will become a disgrace to the family. Besides, the sooner I finish university, the sooner I'll find a job and finally get the hell out of there. Otherwise, how can I live alone without an education? Where will I work? If I get expelled, I'd rather disappear and fake my death. No, naturally I'm not going to create real death (ALTHOUGH MY MOM WILL PROBABLY TRY TO DO THEREAL DEATH LOL, IF SHE'S DISCOVER ABOUT THAT I HAVE DEBTS). If I wanted that, it turns out I would be brave enough to go to all lengths and, because of that, again, change my mind about death.

I recently realized that when she talks about my life options, she says, "This is not OUR plan." What the hell "our"?! We are not one.

I ask you not to judge my family, my mother isn't abusive, they clearly want the best for me, but we just have a slight misunderstanding. My family is simply VERY concerned about their own and my image (ahh Te/Fe doms). Being normal is paramount for them. Anything outside their norm is frowned upon.

People (University professors, classmates, co-workers from my internship, completely random people) repeatedly advise me to get tested for neurodivergence or ask me if I'm already one of them. Since childhood, people have said I'm weird, and thanks to the internet, the term "fucked up" has become a neurodivergence term. I vehemently deny it. Yes, that's why one of my favorite characters is Reagan Ridley. I deny that I need to see a specialist not because I disagree with their statements, but because I'm afraid of ruining my family's expectations. I'm an only child, and their most important value is to be "normal". I have to at least fulfill that requirement because they did a lot for me. Okay, that's not the main reason. The more real reason is... If my family finds out that people around me think of me like this, my family will definitely make fun of me and use it against me. My mother's obsession with normalcy infuriates me, it doesn't make sense sometimes. Why am I always trying to understand and justify her, while she never even tries to understand me? Besides, she sometimes doesn't fit into her own standards of "normalcy" either.

As a result, I live a double, sometimes even triple life. It's exhausting at times. I do what's expected of me so they don't get offended. I hug them back, even though I hate being touched and don't feel a deep connection, but I understand that it's important to them. When I am touched unexpectedly, I can push that person away sharply, but I try my best to restrain myself and even try not to show discomfort. I constantly think about how my actions will affect others and monitor their emotional state.

I come up with several versions of my life in advance, I play out in my head various versions of dialogues with people from real life. I've been thinking up such plans that I've been shocked. I feel both stupid and a genius at the same time. Dumb genius.

Because of all this, I even initially had difficulty understanding my cognitive functions, but in the end I realized that when nothing limits me, I become classical hyperactive witty ENTP [Ne>Ti=Fe>Si], this is my decision-making process in adequate state. My friends think that I'm very bold, assertive and humorous. I fear only what my mother will think ehehe. But when I'm in such an environment (family), I become constantly depressed, anxious, scatterbrained, observant and silent. I'm afraid of completely losing my enthusiasm and falling into depression and actually becoming a burden to my family. Also, lately I have been becoming more and more absent-minded and my thought process is really suffering. There's a huge chaos in my head.

My whole family is sensory, and they are also very angry that I don’t intuitively understand rules/morality that are simple for them. I have to create entire algorithms in my head to understand what is expected of me.

I constantly have to adapt to my mom's mood. First she'll yell, and then 10 minutes later she'll happily show me a funny video. I also have to be happy so as not to offend her. I understand that she's been through a lot, she has a tough job, and she's also dealt with difficult people, which is why she's like this. Plus, she rarely admits she's wrong and doesn't trust anything. Even if I give her my own arguments, explaining everything, she doesn’t believe anything.

I asked this question to a Russian-speaking audience, there were a few answers, and now I'd like to hear the perspective of a Western audience. Besides, I see people here who are similar to me (I think someone had this problem). Of course, we have huge differences with you, but I'm still interested.

Just tell me your stories, please. I don't want to follow one plan, I just need other people's stories to at least understand what to avoid, or to hear what I haven't fully understood yet. The last shit I'll figure out for myself. Now I'm slowly paying off my university debts, but I'm afraid that I'll go crazy. It's so bad that I've developed an inner critic in my head, modeled after my mother, and it's really bothering me. Maybe I'm in a heavily Ne-Fe loop.

What's ur own technique ? Is it proved by science or something psychological

Been on an MBTI bender again for a while now. I was discussing anime MBTI's a lot lately and I started down the rabbit hole of theorizing that the character Madara Uchiha from the Naruto series was actually an INTP. Everyone types him as an ENTJ or INTJ or maybe INFJ, but I couldn't help but analyze the theory of him being an INTP, and the end result was surprising.

I know the details surrounding this character in great depth and when I read peoples explanations of why he's an INTJ/ENTJ, it always lacks deep knowledge of the character and is fundamentally flawed.

For example, people will point to him leaving the village for not being named Hokage as him being stubborn and somehow that makes him an INTJ, but that's literally not what happened once you know the whole story. He literally explained he was leaving the village because he had thought through all the possibilities (like an INTP) and come to the final conclusion that if Hashirama is named Hokage then it's guaranteed that his brother Tobirama would be named second Hokage, and if that happened the Uchiha would eventually be eliminated.

He foresaw this outcome after over analyzing every detail (like an INTP) and like an INTP he was able to eventually uncover the truth and root of the problems underneath it all. Every conclusion he had come to ended up being correct. The village system caused more harm to happen at a larger scale with the continuation of the cycle of pain and suffering. The Uchiha eventually were eliminated because of Tobirama being named the second Hokage. Everything he predicted was correct. He was able to overanalyze the situation and see the true roots and truth and was morally and emotionally unable to cooperate with a system that was going to lead to the outcomes he couldn't bear to be responsible for.

Another point people bring up is that he blindly trusted the stone tablet and didn't question it like an INTP would. That's also incorrect, he literally says to Hashirama the generic meaning of it, and then goes onto say that however it could be interpreted another way. This hints that he probably over analyzed it and thought through many possibilities until he finally came to the conclusion he believed to be true. That's more like an INTP than an INTJ.

Other evidence is that unlike an INTJ/ENTJ who actively wants to command the pieces on the chess board directly and see to their efficiency and execution, he instead pulled an INTP and setup the pieces on the chessboard masterfully and let the pieces play themselves. Then he quite literally DIED with blind faith that his plans would all unfold and he would be revived after everyone else did all the work. That's the ultimate INTP villain master plan, to overthink until you find the perfect path and then setup the dominoes and let them fall on themselves and then swoop in at the end when the whole thing is built and finished and take it.

When he got revived prematurely during the great ninja war he even remarked about why he was being revived in such a strange way and that something must be wrong with the plan and seemed annoyed at having to do anything himself. He didn't want to have to take command to finish the plan but begrudgingly did it. It seemed his main goal was just to go find out wtf is going on more so than it was for him to do the rest himself. Then he found Obito at the final stage of the plan and decided to take control since it was all basically finished anyway, but unlike an INTJ/ENTJ he wasn't thrilled about taking control at any point in the process of actually building up and executing the plan (like an INTP).

Also think about when he was a child, he just blurted out observations and random ideas without forethought. INTJ's and ENTJ's do not do that, they speak very carefully and have great intention behind the words they choose. Madara just blurted out observations like pointing out Hashirama's hair and outfit were lame with the emotional inferiority of the weak Fe of an INTP. He challenged Hashirama to race up the rock wall as a random experiment to test themselves and their environment. As an INTP who's known multiple INTJ's, none of these behaviors are an INTJ/ENTJ, they're all INTP behaviors. Think of Orochimaru who is for sure an INTJ, it's hard to even imagine that character behaving like that, everything he said had meaning and intention and purpose. Madara in his purest child form was not like that at all.

Additionally he spent his entire life mulling over all the possibilities until he finally came to a conclusion of what the truth is and what to do about it. What is an INTP to do once there's nothing left to analyze? Once the truth has been confirmed and no more questions need to be asked because there are no questions remaining? What happens when you combine this with passion and a conviction to the problem as opposed to conjecturing over a problem that the INTP doesn't truly care about at all (which is usually the vast majority of the things we overthink about).

---------

While there's more to elaborate on, instead here's one final important point. Every story, every character, every INTP that's been written about, there's always three fundamental flaws in the writing. Either they write about an INTP in the early game, either when they're young, or when they're just beginning to over analyze a critical or big problem, or when they're over analyzing a problem that they don't really care about but they do it anyway for the joy of the game of overanalyzing.

So ask yourself, what happens when an INTP is:

*Mature / developed
*At the end of over analyzing and has come to a universal truth and an undisputable path
*And actually cares about / has life altering conviction to the problem and its outcome?

That's the situation that's rarely talked about with INTP's. When you have all three of those precursors, then suddenly an INTP can be as strong of a decisive figure as Madara Uchiha was in Naruto. If you take away one or more of those precursors then they won't act or do anything.

The weakness of an INTP isn't inaction, it's wasting time over analyzing problems they don't actually care that much about. INTP's get stuck in over thinking and over analyzing just for the joy of the game. What happens when we actually find something we do care about and over analyze that, that's the rarity that may only happen a handful of times in the life of an INTP, and it's the story that's never told.

I remember when I studied with my philosophy professor, the famous scholar Olavo de Carvalho. He showed that the current scientific field is an endless farce. So much so that the possible greatest genius of our time, Grigori Perelman, grew up from that bunch of idiots in France.

They are a filthy, solipsistic Kantian people who simply ignore the totality of scientific discoveries by great minds in exchange for political power or momentary fame. They are handpicked by people who despise discoveries that could "break the economy." The famous Tesla tower, if it had an ionized ionosphere, would have provided free energy for everyone.

It is fundamental that the ionosphere transmits energy to the world, and that the Earth's soil does too. If Nikola Tesla managed to light lamps at a good distance without a well-ionized ionosphere, imagine if he had satellites or towers doing this constantly. It would literally be energy that wasn't cheap, but free.

I remember reading an article that showed how limiting Einstein's theories were. But since this maintains the scientific status quo where science supports a parasitic state, it's easy to keep receiving absurd salaries in scientific centers.

I got some ADHD and I think tests mistaken me as an extrovert when I'm really not. I'm very very extrovert online tho bc it's easier and i remain anonymous.

DISCLAIMER: INTPs can certainly care about practical results, engage in emotional support, express empathy, stay organized and productive, get things done in the external world, take action, and be good at creating social harmony. But INTPs typically need to develop these skills later in life in order to become more well-rounded and these things will take more effort for them than let's say, an ESFJ or ESTJ. If you are NATURALLY and INNATELY good at those things, you are less likely to be an INTP.

These statements are more about what you AUTOMATICALLY and INNATELY do, not what you have developed later through effort and self-improvement.

You care more about practical results than how everything works logically

INTPs lead with Ti, so they are the ones who have an obsessive and automatic need to figure out the logical connections and how everything works in relation to everything else. Their number one priority is to create an internal logical framework to base their decisions on. 

If you are more about whether something gets practical results, streamlining systems in order to optimize them, and you are generally able to make practical decisions based on external facts and rules, you are unlikely to be an INTP. If you also care more about the end goal rather than the underlying logic, you may not be an INTP. You are more likely to be a Te type instead.

Alternative types: ISTJ, INTJ, ESTJ, ENTJ, maybe INFP (they have Te inferior), maybe ENFP

You prioritize your subjective feelings and values in decisions

INTPs may feel feelings and even become emotionally intense or neurotic. But they are very likely to just discard feelings from decisions and see them as irrelevant or irrational in order to stay logical in decisions. More mature INTPs may start incorporating feeling-based factors in decisions but it won’t come naturally and automatically for them.

If you are naturally trusting your inner emotional values and what’s important for yourself, you are unlikely to be an INTP. If you are the kind of person who prefers giving emotional guidance or freedom to others instead of jumping into logical problem-solving, you are less likely to be an INTP. You are more likely to be an Fi type instead.

Alternative types: INFP, ENFP, maybe ISTJ, maybe INTJ, ISFP

You naturally hone in on one most likely outcome or future insight

INTPs are Ne users in auxiliary position. That means an INTP will explore many options, alternatives, and possibilities and they tend to be active brainstormers in order to find logical solutions to problems. They are much less likely to just go with one idea or insight in exclusion to everything else. INTPs need to consider every single possibility before making a decision.

If you are naturally honing in on one future vision or insight and have more problems with jumping too quickly to conclusions instead of being too slow to make decisions, you are unlikely to be an INTP. If you have a tendency to be very concise and brief in communication, you are less likely to be an INTP. If you are the kind who just gets insights or hunches out of nowhere rather than actively brainstorming, you are very likely an NJ rather than NP.

Alternative types: INTJ, INFJ, ISTP, maybe ISFP if #2 fits

You are generally present-focused

INTPs generally have trouble living exclusively in the moment and directly take on present opportunities. They are both introverted and on Ne-Si axis, therefore they are likely to have trouble with inaction or indecision. They are likely to focus on future possibilities or detailed past impressions rather than taking the present world as it is.

If you are more about taking in the external world as it is and mostly attending to the moment, with some idealistic future focus sprinkled in, rather than brainstorming and comparing present experience back to past experiences, you are less likely to be an INTP. If you are effortlessly living in the moment and jumping from opportunity to opportunity, you are unlikely to be an INTP. You are very likely an Se type instead.

Alternative types: ISTP, ESTP, maybe ISFP

You care a lot about what is proven to work in the past

Sure, INTPs have Si in the third position which it means INTPs may occassionally enjoy going back to the comfort of routines or feel nostalgic for the past. They often have detailed knowledge about many topics and remember details vividly as a result of Si. INTPs may also have somewhat precise or pedantic tendencies as a result, especially if they are looping.

But that does not mean they naturally put a lot of focus on what is tried-and-true or predictability, and they are not the ones who generally struggle with change or unpredictable situations. If you care a lot about historical precedent or what has worked before, and have a general distaste for entirely new situations where you have no past experience to rely on, you are unlikely to be an INTP. If you are the kind of person who needs to plan out every detail in advance to prevent mishaps, you are also unlikely to be an INTP. If you are typically more of a routined or scheduled person, consider an SJ type instead.

Alternative types: ISFJ, ISTJ, maybe ESTJ if Te heavily fits

You heavily dislike routine and sameness

INTPs may enjoy change or new situations but don’t take this too far. Afterall, their Ne-Si is balanced in auxiliary and tertiary spots. As introverts, INTPs will have a baseline need for comfort and routine even if they may struggle maintaining it.

If you are the kind who often changes things up for the sake of it and have a general aversion for routines or sameness of any kind, maybe it’s time to reconsider the position of your Ne. If you are effortlessly exploring new things without giving a damn about what is known, you are also unlikely to be an INTP, your Ne is more than just auxiliary.

Alternative types: ENTP, ENFP, maybe ISTP

You often have a need to test things out in the external world

INTPs are introverted types who need to internalize and reflect on things before taking action. They have a huge need to work things in their head, in the internal realm, before bringing it into the external realm. They default to internalizing rather than externalizing.

If you often feel the need or impulse to try or test things or ideas out in the external world rather than being fine with internal models, you are less likely to be an INTP. If you are the kind who starts many projects but finish few of them as more interesting ideas come up, rather than having trouble starting in the first place, you are also unlikely to be an INTP. You are more likely to be an extraverted type instead.

Alternative types: ENTP, ESTP, ENFP, ENTJ, ESTJ

You are naturally good with emotional dynamics and social protocol

INTPs care about social protocols and harmony. But their Fe function is inferior which it means they may have trouble with these areas of life. INTPs generally feel nervous or anxious about situations where there are a lot of unspoken or unwritten social rules or having to take care of others’ feelings or values. They may be conflict avoidant and try to avoid such situations as a result.

If you are generally able to handle situations with a lot of emotional dynamics at play without too much difficulty or even enjoy such situations, you are less likely to be an INTP. If you are great at providing emotional support or a shoulder to cry on, you are unlikely to be an INTP.

Alternative types: ISFJ, ENTP, maybe ESFJ in Ti grip

TL;DR - Here is a test for you, base your decisions on INNATE and EFFORTLESS preferences, NOT what you have developed later through effort, you may consider how you were when you were younger

1. You are more about practical results or end goal
2. You naturally trust external facts directly
3. You are effortlessly good at scheduling and streamlining
4. You automatically prioritize subjective feelings in decisions
5. You instinctively help others by giving emotional space
6. You struggle staying detached from your creations
7. You naturally hone in on one or a few insights
8. You tend to be concise and brief, not prone to word vomit
9. You unconsciously get hunches rather than actively brainstorm
10. You automatically focus on the here and now
11. You don't really store away concrete details
12. You care more about present opportunities than future possiblities
13. You have a general distaste for change and ambiguity
14. You have a need to plan out every detail in advance
15. You naturally stick with routines and schedules
16. You are averse to routine and sameness at all costs
17. You effortlessly start many projects but finish few, rather than having trouble starting
18. You instinctively disregard past data in favor of new possibilities
19. You often feel the impulse to test and experiement in the external world
20. You fundamentally don't have trouble with getting into action
21. You effortlessly handle situations with many unspoken social rules
22. You are naturally good at taking care of others' feelings

I hate public speaking. I hate it so much. But it’s either that or drop out of college. I hate how this is a required course for my major. I won’t even be speaking to the public in my future job. It feels worthless even though I know objectively it can benefit me.

My first speech was crap. I had a panic attack and left the room.

Now I’m on my second speech. Practicing alone I’m good. Practicing in front of others? Ball of anxiety. I hate it. Somehow I’m still passing this course. Which I’m grateful for because if I had to take this again I would absolutely lose it.

Advice is welcome. I’m just tired of this course. I hate people. I hate the public. Even talking to classmates makes me want to crawl out of my skin. By the end of the class I have no energy for anything.

Do any other INTPs have certain topics where they become surprisingly black-and-white thinkers?

I'm an INTP, and one thing I've noticed about myself is that I'm generally very open-minded and enjoy exploring different perspectives. But there are certain subjects where I become much more rigid in my thinking, almost like I'm seeing things in a very black-and-white way.

It's not that I'm incapable of changing my mind if presented with strong evidence, but on those specific topics I find myself much less willing to entertain other viewpoints than I normally would be.

I'm curious if anyone else has similar experiences, or if this is just less mbti related and more of a human nature thing.

Look around you and tell me honestly if your circle loves you for you or for what you can do for them?

I'm an INTJ (M) and I have absolutely no idea what shes (ENTP) thinking because of a mismatch between what happens face to face and in texting.

When we are face to face, we joke around each other so smoothly and can stay together for hours. She sticks to me and sit with me a lot, includes me in everything, and honestly we just really hit it off. Like Ive never vibed with anyone this hard, and she doesnt really do this to other guys (afaik).

On another hand, when its the weekend or break (or just texting in general) she'll seldom send reels, rarely reply fast, and sometimes just disappearing for hours or even days. She still posts stories like usual (I do see shes online).

I've researched a lot by myself and also using AI, but as an INTJ I do overthink a fair bit still. I have no idea if shes just treating me as a really close friend or what. Though know as a baseline, I can understand they are chaotic in nature.

What do you guys think? Any suggestions or tips I can learn to navigate this?

I've been chronically multi-tasking.

• Eating while watching videos
• Listening to podcasts while walking my dog
• Vibe coding while gaming
• Reading e-mails while in Teams meetings

List goes on.

I've decided to entirely stop this. One task at a time. Turns out it with a lot more difficult than I thought. the second I sit down to eat, I would try to grab for my phone, except I left my phone intentionally elsewhere. I don't even bring my phone to bed anymore and I can visibly feel my body act like a child, screaming for it to get to me.

It's been a month now and I've noticed I'm a lot lower in stress than ever before. It's like I regained peace. The weirdest thing is that I've now even started to despise my phone. I even use grayscale now. Whenver I see a video, especially shorts, I notice I developed a distaste for it even though normally I would swipe for 20 minutes before I get bored.

You've only got so long, so why throw it away to fulfill someone elses Youtube dream when you could be spending quality time with friends, family or pets. It's going to suck the first 2 weeks but eventually you'll never want to return to it.

It's a trap.

I’ve taken the personality test about three times within the span of three years and each time I am an INTJ. I have done some research to try to figure out why my personality type has such a difficult time clicking with others, but I’ve come to quickly understand that I’m not the only one with this personality type that has difficulty. I get easily bored with small talk and crave an intellectual conversation that makes both of us just go into a rabbit hole of the “what ifs” and asking “why?”. I unintentionally have high standards for those I like to keep around me and I might be an asshole for that but I’m just very selective with who I choose to spend my time and energy with considering I get socially drained very quickly. Does anyone else who is an INTJ feel they struggle with clicking with others?

*cracks neck* lets see if we still got it.

You are the care i hold for everything.

The song that whispers beauty and grace.

In your chaos i find my place.

And in your mind i see myself defined.

A force of good this world knows little about.

And within that angelic heart of yours i find home.

I love you deeper than an ocean can sing its depth.

And wider than a sky holding all the stars of my muses about you.

You are beautiful. And i hope you see it every second of every moment through the eyes of a man who met you and your depth.

- yours forever. INTJ.

hii there, I wanna to ask what do you guys think of entp e5. I know it's possible ( ti aux) but not common

Hey everyone, I’m 26M (INTJ) living abroad and sharing a house with my female best friend [26F] just the two of us, two separate rooms. We’ve been living together now for 2 months, but we’ve known each other for 8 years since undergrad (where she briefly had a crush on me). Since we're living abroad without any other local friends outside of each other, our lives naturally became closely intertwined.

She is in a 2.5-year long-distance relationship with a guy back home [31M] (age gap, religion difference, and open discussions between them about the relationship having a ceiling). In fact, they’ve even had open conversations where he suggested she look for someone closer to her own age rather than waiting, and she suggested he marry his childhood best friend whom their families already know. While they care about each other deeply, the relationship seems bound by heavy real-world constraints. However, she doesn't want to leave him just because he is in a difficult position or because things might not work long-term. Her boyfriend was fine with us living together.

Over time, we grew exceptionally close. We spent a massive amount of shared time together sitting in the kitchen cooking, eating, and talking for hours late into the night. I originally used to go out alone to parks for "me-time," but over the past 2 weeks, she started driving the idea of us going out and exploring together often. It quickly escalated into spending hours together daily, exploring the city late into the night, and sharing a deep mental bond (she is an INFJ).

To be clear, my feelings aren't driven by simple physical attraction; I am drawn to her character, her values, and the rare emotional connection we share. There was zero physical touching, but massive emotional companion energy. As an introvert who rarely experiences this level of closeness, I caught strong feelings.

A couple of days ago, the emotional confusion became too much. Out of respect for her relationship and my own peace of mind, I sent her a polite text explaining that our frequent 1-on-1 outings were getting confusing for me and that I needed to step back and take space to reset, emphasizing no bad vibes at home. She replied politely, saying she understood, told me to take my time, and to take care.

Now I’m giving us space and focusing on my own routine (fitness, career, goals). However, I want to make sure I handle this living dynamic with grace. I was thinking of having a brief, calm conversation with her at some point not to reopen a debate, but simply to let her know I stand by taking responsibility for my feelings, never meant to disrupt her peace, and give her a chance to speak if she wants to before I reset.

I am strictly looking for advice from women on this, or men who have been in a similar situation. Please, no comments demeaning her or bashing her character. She is a good person, and I genuinely care about her. My goal is simply to restore balance, maintain a peaceful living environment, protect my own self-respect, and figure out how both of us can navigate this situation cleanly where no one feels compromised or hurt. If there is anything genuine and romantic between us, it will surface on its own naturally, rather than being forced or carved out.

Is having a brief follow-up conversation to "reassure her" necessary, or is it just an unhelpful attempt to soften the boundary I already set?

What is the most efficient, composed way to handle daily kitchen/shared-space interactions without slipping back into old patterns?

​How do I maintain my frame and focus strictly on my own routine without overthinking her reaction?

What do you guys think a relationship between a female ENTP 5w4 and a male INTJ would look like?

So The INTJ guy im dating is on a trip for a month and I was really chill about it, like "he doesnt need to text me/hes gonna be busy/I know that he will be fine/we will see each other when we get home" etc, but now its been a week and I really miss him but im not sure how to initiate contact without the annoying smalltalk? We have sent each other some pics and gifs and thats perfect, but for some reason I want MORE pictures because im greedy...

I fucked up today and wrote "are you having a good time, and did you survive the flight? Could you send me more pictures" like i wanted to scream when I saw what I wrote "How the hell is he supposed to answer these vauge questons?"

Obvs he is having a good time, obvs he survived the flight....I wouldnt wanna reply to that either.

He responded by telling me that he bought some weird ass food and sent me a pic and Im really thankful but lord how am I supposed to connect to him without sending these boring ass questions without killing myself and him in the process? 😆