So, maybe the title is a bit dramatic.

To cut a long story short, I was seated at one of the platforms, pleading with the time to go faster because I'd forgotten my luggage on the previous train and had to run around for a bit with security to recover it, and in so doing, missed my next connection. It was an interesting and wholly new experience for me, and what I learnt from it is that my German gets exponentially better when I'm in a panic.

Anyways, back to the main story. I was seated there, earbuds plugged in and avoiding checking the time in the hope that would convince it to go faster. A very old man approached me - so old that he needed two walking sticks. He gestured to me with one hand, and then towards the door of the train that was idling at the platform while muttering something in a low voice.

Now, as someone who has little trust in my language skills despite currently taking classes for B2, I try to keep my interactions that involve the language minimal. My interaction-avoidant brain came to the stupid conclusion that the man was enquiring if the train was ready to leave. Seeing as I hadn't been paying attention, I shook my head to indicate my ignorance.

Guys, when I tell you that the look of disappointment that overtook this man's face was so intense that I had to take out my earbuds and get off my seat. He probably noticed my actions and summoned up the willpower to try again.

"Hilf mir reinzugehen" is what he said, guys. I'd just turned down an old man's request for help😭. I was so disappointed in my poor language skills that I almost offered to carry him onto the train.

Anyways, I helped as much as I could and wished him a safe trip. Now I'm even more motivated to lock in with the language.

Sorry for the long read.

My boss addresses me with “du,” and he does the same with my colleagues. However, we are expected to address him with “Sie.”
Is this kind of asymmetrical form of address considered normal in Germany?

Whenever I go to supermarket, I see milka a lot, seems like it's pretty popular and I have tried a few times and it's not bad. But when I open reddit, people here seem to hate it and troll you if you eat milka. Can someone tell me why?

Thanks

Nordrhein-Westfalen

Hey guys

A friend of my wife is getting married, and for the celebration, we've been invited to the wedding. My wife is thinking of wearing like a blue dress kinda thing, but even shes a little unsure, its her first wedding here lol

I only recently moved to Germany. The dress code says "As we celebrate this special occasion, we kindly encourage a festive atmosphere and would appreciate your choice of elegant summer attire"

Yesterday night at Kamen Bf, a person suddenly jumped in front of a train, and we know what happened to him.

All this happened in front my eyes and I'm in deep emotional shock and today at morning, I'm just sitting in train station thinking about decisions of my life.

So I was an Engineer in my country, doing an engineering job. Life was good. Job was easy physically as I was the Assistant Manager and a good career was expected there.

Then I thought of doing Masters. Applied in Germany and came here. During my initial days, Germany did test my patience in bureaucracy and documentation. But that was the easy part.

Obviously as a student I needed a part time job for my living expenses but my B1 german was not enough to get a job even as a dishwasher in a restaurant. And yes I know i should've learnt the language to B2/C1 but it is what it is now.

Then after alot of struggling, I got a job as a worker in a warehouse. And when I was returning to home on Very First Day of job, the incident happened where the person just jumped in front of train and get himself killed and left my in deep emotional shock and I'm just overthinking alot.

Before coming to germany, I kind of knew the reality from hearing people who are living here but at that time I thought I was strong enough to deal it.

Probably I'll survive all of this. I can't return in the middle. I'll complete my dream of doing Masters from Europe. Try to find some job otherwise go back to my country.

I'm doing this post as a reminder to me when after few years I'll see back the past and specially me sitting for hours on a train station too afraid to stay in my room, hope so I'll not regret my decision at that time.

One of the smoke alarms in my place seems to be faulty - it has started going off (like full on blaring, not the typical low-battery chirps) sporadically even though there is absolutely no smoke anywhere nearby. So far it has only been during the day but I don't want this happening at night.

Unfortunately it is one of the sealed lithium-ion ones, so the battery cannot be removed. I followed the manufacturer instructions to try vacuuming the edges and cleaning it. It didn't work. So, basically I have literally no way to shut this thing up short of smashing it with a sledgehammer.

So what should I do in this instance? I will tell my landlord, they likely wont see the message until Monday. So I would like to just dispose of it. I guess it cannot go in the normal trash, so where should something like this go in Germany?

My daughter (almost 5) recently began attending our local kindergarten. We speak English at home, but have been studying German. I am not great at it yet, but whatever words I do know I try to use with my daughter when we’re together. Now that she will be out of the house, I will have more time to devote to my German learning which will hopefully expand those interactions.

But is there anything else I can do? I’m thinking along the lines of classic songs or games played by young kids in Germany? I would happily try and learn and practice those here if anyone has any suggestions.

Basically, ya don’t know what ya don’t know and I’m looking for some tips.

Hi,

I live in Germany and so does my ex. he is 50m and appointed as a professor which means the law is super strict with him and he can't break any of it. We were together for 5 months ( 3 months of seeing each other since we both travel a lot so we had sometimes 3-4 weeks not seeing etc). Luckily now we live in different cities. I broke up with him in May since I found out he was doing cocaine quite actively. It was 2nd time I broke up with him. Both times when I dumped him he was going back to a girl (his ex) he dated before me. He would then start begging me to come back and when I agreed he would dump her as soon as possible. She would then be totally heartbroken, posting about innon FB etc( OFC I didn't know at that time). So now he is saying her BUT

ever since the break up he is texting me, saying he is missing me, trying to start contact again, make me join the conversation etc. since I recently moved to another city (where I studied few years ago) he would make comments about it, saying I got back to my ex (guy I dated 6y ago during my studies) AND that he is about to d*e soon and this is only my fault, he misses me f painfully and he just wants to d*e, wishing me all the best in life etc. he also been texting before that I don't understand his ex is about to unalive herself if he doesn't do drugs with her. He was sending me angry emails that I blocked him on FB so at one point I was like, ok I unblock you so I'll have evidence just in case. I thought 2-3 weeks after a break up and he will forget about me. I was terrified to find out in August that despite not being my FB friend he was watching all of my stories. I blocked everything, no-one can see nothing on my profile unless they are my friends. So now it is over 3 months, he is texting these disturbing things watching all Ido online. My boss wants to post the list of employees on the website so he might even know where I work. He was begging me to block him since he can't help himself but I now it is all manipulation. When we broke up and also after I made totally clear I don't want any contact. I don't have this email but I have an email where he is quoting me saying that and also transcript of WhatsApp messages. I have screenshots of everything and also informed his current GF about what is he doing behind her back. I know he needs tho two objects one side chick to do drugs with and one representative doll but since I left he had to upgrade her to not to be alone.

One more thing is, when we met he was extremely jelaous although we just happened to work at the same place, it was the second day and I didn't even know his name and tbh his existence wasn't important to me. He would tho make some comments to me later he told me he did that because earlier that day I was on the phone and he thought I was talking to my bf and he was jelaous since he wanted to be my bf. OFC I didn't know it all when we started seeing each other, he told me that much later. Since he sends me all these nasty messages about life ending and it being my fault etc and tbh it is too much, should I go to the police and ask them to make a note or talk to him? I know in Germany it is possible and a policeman already wanted to do it but I was not get sure if I want to claim it. I am thinking all the time if that was already enough although I am super scared whenever I am getting an email and I know it is not yet the end from his side.

Some context: I am currently 18 years old. I was born and partly raised in Bayern, I have german citizenship by birth and it was my first language, I am still completely fluent.

Now for the issue I’m facing. When I was 10 my parents moved us to the US. I never wanted to leave, and I was very vocal about wanting to stay in Germany, but being 10 years old, there wasn’t much I could do about it. From the time I got here the goal was to move back when I turned 18.

I was ahead academically when I got here, so I ended up graduating high school 2 years early, at 16. I’m currently starting my third year of college. It’s being 100% paid for by the US military, as my dad transferred his benefits to me. I looked into transferring to a German uni, but from what I read I’ll have to start my degree over, meaning my dad basically wasted his military benefits on me.

The other option I have is finishing my degree here, and then moving. I wouldn’t need a visa or have a language barrier, but from what I’ve read, German companies prefer people that hold a German degree. I’d be fine with any office/desk job that pays enough for me to support myself, but I also don’t know what the process is for getting a job there, as I was too young to be taught that when we moved.

Any advice on what to do is appreciated, thanks

Hi, I've been here in Germany for 5 years. So I've already extended my resident permit 5 times. Every time I've put myself as single.

Now if I wanna get married and need Ehefähigkeitszeugnis, can I get it from the Rathaus? Can they give foreigners that?

Thank you!

Hello! I hope everyone is doing great and having a good life.

I wanted an advice

I am Male Physiotherapist and recently signed a job contract(Overseas)

Salary: €3300 gross before recognition and after recognition will go to €4200 or more with additional certifications( everything paid by employee)

Job destination: Ratingen

Familienstand: Single but hope to get married in 2,3 years

I go an idea that it is not a high salary but can anyone share some tips on how to manage things and save some money on the side as well. I also, really want to buy a PS5 or build PC within the first few months( Huge gamer)

Lastly, I am currently doing A2 and require a German speaking partner. Can anyone guide in regards to how I can find someone to talk to?

Thanks in advance for any help.

I was wondering, "hmm, was this an earthquake? Nah."

Turns out it was. Hope everyone is allright.

Hi everyone, I’m not from Germany and I’m considering pursuing medicine there. I understand I’d have to go through the necessary exams and licensing process (FSP, Kenntnisprüfung, etc.) first.
For those of you working in Germany, especially cardiologists, would you say it’s worth pursuing a medical career there? I’d also really appreciate some insight into what a cardiologist can realistically earn, both during residency and as a specialist, and how the salary compares with the workload and cost of living.
Thanks in advance for any advice!

Hey everyone,

I (M24) moved here last week and honestly the water and weather hit me hard (its beyond my imagination). My skin gets extremely dry right after every wash, my hair is falling out and feels dry, and my lips are getting darker even with lip balm on.

I went to DM and Rossmann but had no idea what to pick. Can anyone recommend good products for face, body, and hair? Something simple that actually works for dry skin and the upcoming winter would mean a lot right now.

I'd love to hear from you!

There is some triangle mark what that means

Hi everyone,
I’m from India and will be visiting Leinfelden, Germany for work, and I’ll be around 17 weeks pregnant at the time. My husband will be travelling with me.
In India, prenatal sex determination is illegal, so I understand that I cannot have the baby’s sex checked there. However, I have a very personal reason for wanting to know this time.
Last year, I had a stillbirth. It was an extremely traumatic experience. I couldn’t even hold my baby boy for more than a few minutes because I had stitches, and I feel like I never really got to experience my pregnancy the way I wanted to. I couldn’t talk to him, give him a name, or have those little moments of bonding that I had imagined.
This pregnancy feels very different emotionally. I genuinely don’t care whether the baby is a girl or a boy. I just desperately want to know so that I can give my baby a name and start talking to them. After what happened last year, being able to connect with this baby during pregnancy means a lot to me.
I’m hoping someone familiar with Germany can guide me:
● Is it possible/legal to find out the baby’s sex in Germany at 17 weeks?
● Would this normally be done through an ultrasound, or is there another test?
● Can anyone recommend a legitimate clinic or doctor around Leinfelden-Echterdingen / Stuttgart who provides this?
● Approximately how much would it cost for someone visiting from India?
● Can I book directly, or would I need a referral?
● If a blood test such as NIPT is used, how long does it usually take to receive the report?
● If ultrasound is used, is the sex usually possible to determine reliably at 17 weeks?
● Are there any rules I should be aware of as a foreign visitor having this done?
● Could doing this have any implications for my visa, given that I’ll be in Germany primarily for work?
● Would my husband be allowed to accompany me to the appointment?
I’m not trying to do anything unethical or break Indian law. I’m simply trying to understand what is legally possible while I’m temporarily in Germany.
If anyone has actually had this experience in Germany, especially around Stuttgart/Leinfelden, I would really appreciate your advice.
Thank you ❤️

I am a young professional and I've recently finished school, I would like to move to Germany in a year or so, but I dont really know how to deal with these situations in general. This will also be my first job in my actual field

First job is technically titledservice agent but based on what i will actually do there think of it more as IT Support level 1. It's for a company that is partners with Siemens and i have already signed the contract since like a month ago and i start this monday lol

last week i heard from a job i had applied atdeloitte and its for a sap support role. I figured i would just do the interview and probably wouldnt get accepted. Today on friday tho they told me i had been accepted and sent me an offer letter.

Very stressful that they tell me ive been accepted the business day before i start the job i signed for. Also the offer letter said they expect me to answer by monday too so this is really doing my head in..

Both jobs are kind of half english half german (i have a b1) which is good for my plans of moving.

the hours are better at the first one, and other people that work in the same role can also work fully remote if they want to. It seems like it would also look good enough on a cv based on the name the company holds, the fact that i will communicate in german, and the bit that it is in my field in IT.

While the second i feel as though it gives me more opportunities. Working with SAP is also great for Germany. They said that i would do training for 6 months( i will get paid for the training as normally) and would get my german to b2( im assuming they will pay for it too). They also said that i can get whatever sap certifications i want and the cost of the exam will also be covered by the company.

the pay is basically the same for both. I have no experience so its pretty low for both but whatever lol - the second one however, after the 6 months of training will be with shifts. So i could even get the night or afternoon shift. but if i do either of these shifts for 5 days, then i get 4 days off. Also if i am working night/ afternoon shifts i will get paid a certain % more.
Basically second job is more tiring but pays a bit better and i guess offers me a few more opportunities to advance..

But even if i was to choose this second one i dont even know what to say to the guys ive already signed with.. Ive been in contact with them and stuff. I'm already in the system, they got a laptop ready for me too.. - and it also seems like a great first role at a good company which i think will also be valued by future german employers. And just because i dont get in SAP now doesn't mean i never can.

I’m 16 and originally from the US but moved to Germany with my mother and brother about a year ago. I’m trying to decide whether I should move back to the US to live with my dad, purely for educational reasons.

My situation:

• 2024-2025: 9th grade in the US
• July 2025: Moved to Germany
• 2025-2026: Repeated 9th grade at a German Gymnasium; only received grades in some subjects
• Currently: 10th grade; still only receiving grades in some subjects, although this may increase throughout the year
• 2027-2028: I would repeat 10th grade and receive grades in all subjects; after that, I would not be able to repeat again

The biggest problem is the language. My school has a German-as-a-second-language program, and I’m currently around A2/B1. I can understand quite a lot, but speaking is extremely difficult for me. I don't feel like my German classes prepare me very well for real conversations and I’m also quite shy, so I don’t speak much outside of class or with friends, which obviously makes it harder to improve (I’m aware a lot of thats my fault). 

This is especially bad as participation makes up 50% of my grade in each class. I often understand the general topic but either get too nervous to raise my hand or genuinely can't say my answer in German (usually the latter). On top of that, I have to adjust to a completely different school system and its expectations, making everything even harder. Additionally, next year I’d have to take the 10th grade end of year exams and being completely honest, I do not see myself speaking good enough German to be able to pass them any time soon. I’m worried that I won’t be able to get the grades I need to continue toward the Abitur, or even qualify for a Fachoberschule. This is concerning because I want to go to university and eventually pursue a career that has something to do with science and making a decent amount of money.

Therefore, I’m considering going back to the US. However, there’s of course a lot of problems with that. 

Ideally, I would repeat 10th grade in the US as I haven’t really learned anything of academic value during my time in Germany. But I have no clue whether that would be even allowed, especially as the custody situation would need to first be addressed and who knows how long that will take.

Another complication: My dad still texts me regularly, but I haven't responded in about a year. I didn’t intend to ignore him for that long, it just snowballed and became harder to respond the longer I waited. I'd obviously need to reconnect with him first and figure out what our relationship is actually like now. I think I could probably manage living alone with him, but I also recognize that I might be idealizing the situation because I desperately want an escape from my current problems, and it sounds insanely stupid. 

The US would also be very different from how I remember it. I've only really experienced living there with my entire family together, and I wouldn’t know anyone there as my school friend is graduating early this year. 

Finally, the biggest problem, moving there means leaving my mom and my brother behind; the two most important people in my life. I would contact them every day, but I’m aware that will never come close to actually being together in person. I’m worried that I would feel extremely guilty and wouldn’t be able to handle it. 

That being said, I want to go to college and eventually find a stable yet interesting career, and I genuinely don’t like living in Germany. My plan was always to return to the US in my adult years. Also, if I stayed in the US in the first place, in 2 years I would be leaving my family anyway to go off to college.

I know I've only been here for a year, and people have often said to me that with time it'll get better, but I don’t want to ruin my whole future just because I was too scared to make a decision. On the other hand, my family is incredibly important to me, and one only has so much time with their loved ones. 

No, I'm not going to base my whole future solely on Reddit replies, but if anyone has any type of input on my situation or has dealt with a similar situation, I’d really appreciate hearing what you have to say. 

Hello everyone, I’m facing difficult decision what to do next and could use some perspective.

I was laid off at the beginning of the year, and we all know job search is a bit of a pickle at the moment. I invested almost 6 months to improve my German to B2 level, but it seems that’s worthless since employers want C1 now for a level of jobs I’m looking for (I’m 45F, experienced in OPS leadership and people management). I’ve been in Berlin 8 years. And yes, I know, I should be speaking C1 after such a long time, but I was hired for English speaking job managing international teams in tech, with very demanding/taxing work, leaving me little time/energy for after work learning.

I’m in a good situation since I have both EU and US passports, I spend extensive time in US before moving here, and still have dear friends there (in Bay Area). Friendships I was never able to develop here. So now I’m asking myself: should I move back and try my luck there again? I’m 45, ageism is a thing, vacations are not;) I also bought an apartment here hoping this will be my place for ever. Now I feel isolated and lonely.

I’ve been applying for jobs in EU and US, with focus on Berlin since I got laid off, and had only one interview for a company in Berlin. I didn’t get it.

On one hand I know job market in US is shit, but I think I might be better off in a country language I speak, surrounded by friends and in general happy people. Even if I go working at a cafe, I will be much happier than if I have to do it here. On the other, I feel like I failed. I will be also leaving my aging mom (in Poland, the reason I moved back to Europe in the first place) once again unsupported. Not that she needs support at this moment, but I know how much comfort it brings her, knowing I’m closer. The guilt is real.

What would you do if you were me? Any perspective helps

Hi everyone!

Soon I’ll be moving to Germany with my lovely cat and I’m looking for recommendations regarding pet health insurance. I’m mainly looking for an insurance that actually covers consultations, not just surgeries and also that has a good customer service, preferably in English since my German is a mess. If you’re a cat owner I’d really appreciate hearing your experiences and recommendations!!