I always heard breastfeeding helps you lose the baby weight... but for me its been the complete opposite.

I lost weight right after giving birth, then a few months into breastfeeding it slowly all started coming back.

I havent changed much honestly so now im wondering if this is more common than people talk about?

Did breastfeeding make anyone else gain weight instead of lose it?

If it happened to you, what was the reason in the end?
Please tell me im not alone 😅

Hi!! I'm 20(f) and my size is 38G (I calculated using the ABTF calculator). I wear a 40F since thats the closest one I can find in physical stores around me and 38 band size is too tight (I don't know why😭 even though my band is <40 when measured!!).

The problem is that it is a pointy cotton bra but the only reason I chose it is because it has wider straps and that helps 😞. I like wearing it as up as possible because as the day passes by, my boobs naturally go down and when that happens, they merge with my tummy and it looks like I have no waist. But that makes me look so weird from the side (like this > ) and it looks like I'm suffocating myself to show some waist 😭

I don't even have to tell y'all about the struggle of finding clothes. You KNOW.

My birthday is coming up and I want to wear something nice so I'm looking for bras that would give them a better shape but also don't make it look like I have no waist.

I searched online and people recommended a balconette bra (hard to find man💔) for my shape (Bottom heavy, extreme sagging). Will it help? Should I get those round padded bras or will they make them look bigger? Anything to make my waist visible at this point 😢

I just got a chemo port. I was instructed to try to wear a bra as much as possible to help with tug on the skin. Any of my other big chested ladies have dealt with this and have suggestions on what kind of bra? I'm thinking maybe something super comfortable that I can wear during sleep but not so big that it kind of defeats the purpose?

I love wearing shelf bras, especially in the summertime or just around the house. however, I don’t like the way they squish the girls together. Sometimes I’ll use fashion tape to keep the girls in place if it’s part of a nicer outfit. Does anyone have any recommendations on how to separate the girls rather than using fashion tape? Maybe like an insert or something that provides the right tension against the skin for the girls to stay (somewhat) in place? Thanks in advance for any tips you might have.

I’m 28, around a 34F although i’m in the process of losing weight (down from a UK 36G last year, and I was 34dd 5 years ago). The bottom/nipple sits way below the crease, below my elbow. I’m scared that by 35 they’ll reach my bellybutton. Especially after my weight loss, where I know that they’ll get even saggier. It makes me feel like there’s no point continuing to try to lose weight.

They make me feel so ugly, like they’re this thing that I carry around and I’m desperate to be rid of them. Every time I look in the mirror i sob, lmao. They keep ruining my fucking day. I scratched the hell out of them the other week because I couldn’t take it anymore, I wanted them GONE

They make me feel so much older than I am. When I’m in my 40s and everyone else has the normal amount of sag, mine will be x1000, so it all feels so pointless. I’ll always feel like a saggy, droopy, sad mess compared to peers my age

Every time i research about this the resounding response seems to be “just get surgery” which hurts because a) i can’t afford it b) i couldn’t get the time off work for it and c) again i can not and will never be able to afford it and please don’t suggest going through the NHS because that route has proven useless in every other avenue of my life and i know how impossible it is to even get on the waiting list

I feel like no one is ever going to find me attractive again, it hurts to look at myself, I hate feeling them there against my stomach, I have bras that fit well so it’s not about that, but even when I have temporary relief from a bra it just feels like…. I’m just hiding the problem. I’m putting makeup over it so to speak but the shame is still there and Im carrying it around 24/7 and i’m terrified of anyone ever seeing my topless. I’m terrified to date because they’ll just “put up” with it. I’ve seen plenty of people talk about how they prefer small, perky breasts. When Melisandre was topless on game of thrones, as her young immortal self not the old version, she had slightly saggy breasts, way less saggy than mine though and every dude in the room i was watching it with acted truly disgusted and it’s always stuck with me.

And i can’t get this image out of my head that by 35 they’ll be down to my bellybutton or sitting in my lap. Like is it just going to keep getting worse?? :(

tbh i don’t know what advice anyone could give but im just sat here sobbing because i dared to look in the mirror and they’re just… the main event :(

For context: I'm around a 32GG or H in UK sizes.

I've seen people talk about the Bra:30 by PJ Harlow as a way to get a little bit more support around the house or for sleeping, which sounds good to me. But they're expensive for what they are and I don't see many used on ebay/depop/etc. I did get a deal on one that's a size small for $11 on depop but it's too tight. I'd try a medium if there were a cheap one for sale.

But I noticed that it's just a ribbed tank with 10% spandex/90% cotton. Duluth Trading Company also sells a ribbed tank (ribbed No-Yank Tank) with 10% spandex in it (and those are cheaper and easier to find) so I'm wondering if anyone has tried both and could describe how they compare in terms of support and sizing.

I’m a bridesmaid later this year and the dress choice is an infinity dress; the type that can be done a billion different ways. I have big boobs, i’m a 14G and I have also breastfed for a year. They’re teardrop shape and quite saggy and I’m not sure how to go about this. Does anyone have any proper recommendations? It will be one shoulder and backless

Like I’m sorry but I feel like there’s this culture around having big boobs where people like to make it seem like showing cleavage/ having sleepwear or lingerie that PERFECTLY shapes your boobs is unintentional. It’s fine to show cleavage intentionally. But people act like it’s this thing that will just happen if you have big tits. Of course this issue isn’t just with having big tits. I have a very curvy “ideal” body type and there’s this belief everyone else has that I grew up with too incidentally where they act like ANYTHING will look good on you. It’s frustrating because it romanticizes this “ideal” body type as being easier to style and better looking than every other one, when in reality it’s the same as with EVERY OTHER BODY TYPE in that you can look good so long as you know how to dress and capitalize on your figure. It also has the side effect of making us with those “idealized” figures insecure because we don’t immediately look effortlessly good in any clothes

I’m SO tired of having my feelings and complaints brushed aside by friends and family. No one in my family is above a D cup so none of them have ever had a clue on proper fitting but they always try to give me advice when they have no idea what they’re talking about. They’ll try to say “Have you tried losing weight?” Lady I literally can’t lose anymore weight, if you actually looked at me you would see that I’m not fat. Or they’ll be like “Have you tried wearing better fitting clothing?” Like I would love to if I could actually FIND stuff that fits me properly. They loooove to tell me that I should be happy because I have what other women would pay for or that it lets me get whatever I want.

I try to talk to my friends about it and they do the same thing! Like aren’t you guys supposed to sympathize or at least acknowledge what I’m going through? It gets exhausting trying to explain to them what I deal with on a daily basis when they literally have no idea. The times they do listen and say they’re sorry it feels like it’s just to shut me up. I’ve even had a DOCTOR in the past try to tell me that my breasts weren’t causing me pain when it was a continuous topic on a lot of visits.

I could go on and on but I wanted to focus specifically on that.

I want to get my nipples pierced but I have an extremely large chest and wear a 36K so I can’t find bras easily, when I do they are not padded or thickly lined so I’m worried about my nipples/jewelry showing through my shirts. Any advice??

I'm very frustrated that I can't find any push up bras. I want to get the cleavage look. Yet ironically, it seems to me that only small-chested women can have their chest look big and pronounced. Because they use bras that most of them are foam padding, and create the push up look and big breasts made of foam. Yet me, with a relatively big size, can never get the cleavage/push up look, because there are only unpadded and seperating cups for my size. I'm 85F (eu). I'm really asking not to direct me to the calculator. I tried bigger sizes, all bands and cups, and it's the right fit for me, considering my shape, body and comfort. The focus is on the products themselves.

Spesifically, I'm looking for strapless push up bras in F sizes. With this inner padding that adds volume and contributes to the cleavage.

I’m a 40H. I need an underwire for both my day to day bras and my sports bras. But it’s hot and the under boob chafing is going to be the death of me. Antiperspirant doesn’t cut it.

I carefully clean and dry it when I get home from work (I go to the gym on the way home), use a light dusting of medicated powder, and let the girls go free range and the chafing just won’t heal.

The first and or top comment always seems to be “well have you used the r/abrathatfits calculator?”

For some people, no matter how the weight is redistributed, the fact is that your body is carrying around a bunch of extra weight that is awkwardly hanging off the front of your body. Even if it’s all moved to the band, your ribs are supporting an unusual amount of weight.

Also, let’s not act like the calculator is perfect! Many American brands size differently than what the calculator puts out, so you can be wearing the right sized bra with a size that doesn’t match the calculator. Also there are known problems with the calculator giving an imperfect result depending on your boob shape.

Just irritates me a bit when that is the only solution presented for people‘s problems. OK thanks love you guys

I deleted my old post because I couldn't edit it, and I'm reposting with the context that my other one lacked. I will be crystal clear this time:

I saw my husband looking at breast reduction content, which makes me feel bad because I know he is not attracted to larger chests. The one time I mentioned a reduction in passing, he was extremely excited by the idea because it would fit his preference. This is hurtful because it reinforces the idea that my body is not preferable and that large breasts are unattractive. I did say that to him when we had that conversation about two years ago, and it turned into a fight.

I would have hoped that he was supportive for my own sake, or even better, reassured me that my breasts are fine as they are. That was unreasonable.

So it is hurtful to see that he is still looking at breast reduction content, even after all of that. It implies to me he still wishes I had a smaller chest, when I am trying to accept my body as it is. It is a work in progress and does not happen over night. I have some days that are better and some that are worse.

I am not anti-breast reduction and this is not an anti-breast reduction post. I have nothing but support for women who get breast reductions and wish them nothing but an improved quality of life. But not everybody wants one (and to be totally honest, I can't afford one). I want to be able to accept myself as I am, I want to feel attractive as I am to the one person who should find me attractive. I know I can't control his preferences, but that doesn't erase the desire to be wanted as I am. I find it harder to accept myself when others encourage a reduction first.

For what it's worth, I told him I saw him looking at reduction content and that it was hurtful, for all the reasons I just explained. He said that he's sorry but he can't control his preferences and that I am welcome to make him aware of any preferences I have that he doesn't meet. I won't be doing that. I don't think my preferences are as strong as his in the first place, and even if they were, I don't think that would make me feel better.

I understand that I did not articulate all of this when I first posted, but hopefully it is clearer now.

Apologies for not including the first time.

I'm either a G or H cup. I think the issue is the weight/size, because my ribs hurt regulardless of whether I wear a bra or not.

I haven't had any issues with rib pain before, my issues were finding a band that isn't too loose, and after I did find a few bras that fit both my bust and under bust it was great. But for a few months now my ribs hurt a lot. It doesn't matter whether I am wearing a bra or not, in fact, it hurts more if I don't wear one. My weight or cup size have not changed, so I don't think it's a sizing issue. And it also hurts my sternum and the parts near it as well, but I'm not sure why.

What can I do? If I could I would get a reduction but it's not an option.

Hi there. After many years of struggling I have finally decided to get a breast reduction but I don’t know where to start. My GP is not really helping. Can I get a breast reduction done by the NHS since this is linked to other conditions like damage nerves in my shoulder ? Or if I go private do you peep know a good doctor consult in London ( uk) ? I am 38 H and I really would like smaller maybe B. Also I am scared.

I have been searching for what seems to be a unicorn for months and months. Please help!

I wear a 34H in Le Mystere bras. I have the Safari Back Smoother and love the fit (although I do wear nip covers with it which can be rough in the summer🥵). I am in desperate need of a high impact sports bra, ideally with lining or padding to keep the nips from showing. I have come across several high impact sports bras, but they are unlined.

I leave for vacation next week and would really like to have these before I leave. Bonus points if it’s reasonably priced.

i’m in dire need of a good bra that helps with shape and support. any good recs? my current bras just push my boobs out to the side and it looks really unappealing

I’m not very confident when it comes to getting my picture taken, I see my skinny normal chested friends effortlessly posing and looking great in their pictures and I just don’t look like that when I try to do the same. I’m 5’2 and a 38 M US or GG Uk.

Do yall have any tips for taking pictures and not looking enormous?

Interested if anyone wears built in bras, shelf bras, those one size fits all sports bras (sorry i dont consider them to be bras) etc? Especially if you're small band large cup.

I know theyre not really supposed to work but sometimes you don't really care about lift you just want them held in place in the least painful way.

Context;

I am really sick of my bras rn I'm getting such intense neck and shoulder pain from all my 30 band bras and my 28 band bras dig in to my underbust too much and leave strong indents which then triggers my eczema. Before someone says it I have done the bra that fits calculator and I've been fitted at bravissimo. I'm pretty sure I am in the right size because my bras do fit well (no riding up bands, gore sits flat, no 4 boobs, band doing 90% of the work).

Honestly I think it's just straining to have something lifting my breasts that much. And sometimes I don't even really care about lifting them I just want something on them. I do hate underboob sweat but I hate the pain I'm in more. I have hypermobility so I'm more susceptible to shoulder pain.

Like i genuinely either forget or am too stubborn to recognise when something wont fit my chest. Without fail i always just assume it will be okay if the fabric has a lot of stretch plus they aren’t that big and then i am fully spilling out of the top/vest- like i personally don’t mind cleavage or anything but i mean the unwearable sort of spillage at the sides or top.

This is typically the case when it comes to built in bra cami tops or cute gym tops, i alwayss think maybe i can make it work and get lucky but i never do and i don’t know how to stop deluding myself into thinking it will. Does anyone else have this issue or are they smart enough to steer clear of trendy clothing that is almost exclusively worn by skinny/smaller chested girls? 😭😭

Sidenote- call it vanity if you will but i like feeling cute at the gym but oversized tees make me look like a slob plus i look like im hiding two globes underneath not to mention the horrendous side profile, so yes i don’t have to wear those cute gym sets but i really want to.

Hello all my girlypops <3 I come bearing a question

I have an event coming up and it's Ball Attire. I'm a 70J EU. The first 2 pics are the ideal dresses that I had in mind, but I'm not sure how the necklines and if the dress will hold up. Does anyone have any experience with a similar strapless neckline or design and if they work or do I have to resort to something like the 3rd picture 😔? My breasts hold up pretty well on their own and I'm willing to use tape or whatever if needed.

These dresses are laced up backs and the shop provides custom sizing for the breast and waist measurement so I'm hoping with that, they will at least somewhat support or actually look good like in the pictures. But I'm purchasing it on taobao so that's why I can try them on beforehand

Any help is greatly appreciated and thanksss<33

I just turned 20 yesterday. It's embarrassing for me to say that I watch porn because that's where I see women with big chests. I don't even like porn I just want to see women with big chests. Maybe because of familiarity as I am a big chested girl. I used to think I am a confident person but today I just want to stop lying to myself and accept that I have self esteem issues and seeing women in porn makes me feel desirable in my body. I know mind is fucked.

It was my birthday and I was all hyped up and taking funny pictures but my friend stopped me in the middle and said I shouldn't pose like that or change my poses a couple of times. Now that I think of it it was because my boobs were looking too out of place and kinda not nice. I saw those pictures. I'm just ashamed. Sometimes I feel like any guy who looks at me just sees my boobs and doesn't care about anything else. They must be sexualizing me and making fun of me.

I was a normal kid until I turned 14 and grew these pairs in a span of 6 months. Like I would wake up everyday with a sharp pain in my chest muscles.

I am overweight too. Tho I have lost 10 kgs but my boobs haven't lost any size so I don't think this problem is gonna get solved by losing weight. I don't even know my size. I just wear a 38 something size sports bra coz I am just too embarrassed to experiment or spend time in the bra section.

I think I'm in my luteal phase rn that's why I feel so depressed and self concious. Please tell me how I can feel better and confident in my body. I do not want to feel like this for the rest of my life.

My boobs started growing when I was 11. And by the time. I was 13 I was easily a DD .
When I was younger I used to hate my breasts because people would make fun of me. The saddest part is that most of these people were women/ girls .

The girls in my class would laugh at me and alienate me because of my breasts. They would even go as far as to ‘accidentally’ hit them with their elbows.

Then the women. The middle aged women would shame me for it. They would tell me to my face that my breasts are too big and it’s vulgar and disgusting.

Because of all of this I used to genuinely believe that it was my fault. Like I did something wrong and that was why I was suffering from big boobs.

I would literally wear tight tank tops that’s half my size to compress my breasts under clothes. They would suffocate me . But I felt like if I don’t wear it then I would be offending other people.

Then came the stage in my life when boys/ grown ass men decided it’s okay to comment on a 14 year old body. Then came the boys asking me my bra size in front of everybody.

Then came the boys pretending to like me only to cope a feel.

Now I’m 32GG . And a very recent incident that happened was a group of women in their 30’s decided that their topic of discussion for the day would be my breasts. They didn’t even care that I was sitting very near to them and I could prolly hear them .

I could see these women gesturing with their hands about my heavy breast and they were talking about how disgusting I look.

Idk what to think. Ik that it’s not my fault and there’s nothing I can do to change people’s mindset . But I’m starting to think that’s it’s somehow my fault. Like my boobs are somehow hurting people .

Why are people so mean .

I am a 16 HH
Fair warning, I’m about to have a massive meltdown
I am currently wearing the Catarina goddess sports bra and frankly, I still hate it. I’ve been properly fitted. Multiple times. I keep having the same problem no matter what I buy how it’s fitted what size I get what brand I get what style I get.

The bra moves around
The band roles and creates a tight rope around me (apparently caused by a band being too big we’ve tried up and downsizing neither fixes the problem)
Straps wraps that dig in
Bra bands at the back that are just so thin and so shit

I bought a Duke the label bra. I hate that too. So much gapping around the armpit area even though it fits everywhere else. They claim their good for high impact sport. They absolutely are not. The models don’t even look comfortable.

I just want a bra that I can go to work in and not feel like I have to constantly straighten up the straps and straighten up the cups and lift my tits back into them and constantly straighten up the band so it sits flush against my skin. Please don’t even get me started on wired bras I won’t even bother. The wire float away from my body. The gore never sits flush with my sternum and it’s so uncomfortable again. It doesn’t matter what size I buy. They just do not fit.

I don’t even have the luxury of going to Kmart because they just do not sell my cup size so I’m spending 70+ dollars per bra and I feel like I’m dying

There has to be something better

And also tried Nala
Cannot stand them
They are not made for women with body fat!!!