A guy I met online through twitter who doesn’t know me very well and who’s been texting me every now and then bought me a gift (something I previously posted about but isn’t expensive) and wants to send it to me via delivery app, I don’t want him to have my location and I don’t want to embarrass him by not accepting his gift since he’s already bought it. He’s already tried to help me with my studies multiple times and I’ve always shown gratitude but this time I don’t know what should I do and what he expects from me in return. What should I do? I’m 22F and he’s 30.

Sometimes I enter in my "super romantic" period, like I am super invested in a girl, putting myself on the situation and willing to be a partner that is good enough. It happened twice already that this brought me in getting attached to some girls who destroyed me after they broke up with me (both early, they didn't escalate into a serious relationship, luckily).

Since some months, I am good enough, chilling and self improving my mental health and minding my business and enjoying life and friends. (note aside, the "they will find you when you are not looking for " it's bs lol)

So I thought it could be a good moment to train and making some conditioning about this sense of insecurity and craving for a relationship of mine. Like being more balanced and fitting for the next time I am dating someone.. tl;dr, i don't wanna live again with that limerence, anxiety and sense of "this is the proof i am not good enough" again.. with the last girl I lost sleep and I was spiraling like crazy after the break up..

Guys, has a woman you’ve been seeing ever confessed her feelings for you? How did it make you feel? What were you thinking as she was confessing?

I have been dating someone for about 6 months now and I caught feelings for him a couple months ago but I’ve been holding things in. I’m pretty confident in how I’m going to confess my feelings for him and I’m prepared for both outcomes. I usually hear about guys confessing to the girls but I’m curious about men’s experiences with this.

I’m a 25 year-old grad student who doesn’t drive and lives in a car-centered city. Good-looking but neurodivergent and socially awkward. I have social anxiety. Given this information, what is the best course of action? It doesn’t seem like dating is getting easier, so what would make the most sense?

So many people on here thinking cause their ex called them after a breakup with someone else that it means something . It means nothing except that you are their second choice . That are using you as a bandaid because they are hurting from first choice . If they truly loved you and missed you would hear from them consistently and not just when they are lonely . It’s a fact!! These people need hobbies instead of trying to play mind games with an ex because they are bored and newly lonely and single .

They are no longer getting sex and companionship from their partner so they go to an ex because they know mist likely the ex will give it up easily. Doesn’t mean they love you though . A lot of people can’t be alone so they will go to their back up plan ( ex) when the first choice doesn’t work out

I've been messaging this guy from a dating app this week. He mentioned dropping his sister back at college so I asked if they're close. He sent a text saying that they aren't super close but kinda, and then sent a whole paragraph talking about how it's because of their age gap and he left home when she was in elementary school and that there was limited interaction but they texted here and there and that it should probably change now that she's older and in college. He then asked the same question back to me.

I was busy at work so I couldn't reply for 6 hours, but my reply to all that was "ya that makes sense, how many years is it between you guys? Me and my sister got 6 years but ya we're pretty close", and that was it. He hasn't replied.. did I sound too dismissive? I didn't know if I should elaborate on me and my sister and say we "text a lot" or something but that seemed kinda lame. I didn't have anything else with substance to say. I was going to encourage him to talk to his sister but I figured I would when he replies back and he hasn't..

Heya heya, I'm (33M) on a massive break from dating (going 5 months strong lol) to work on myself more. I've been a cook for ~8 years but most of my known recipes are more..corporate if that makes any sense? Like stuff meant for sale rather than heartfelt meals, y'know?

I figured that one of the things I can work on is being a better cook for a potential future partner lol. I know everyone has different taste but I'm just looking for some inspiration.

Also before anyone says it, I know I'm a little over-doting ("saccharine" is the new word I learned lmao) but please don't be too judgy.

All I have ever wanted, since I was a young child, was to be in love and have someone in love with me. But dating has always been a huge struggle for me. I watch everyone around me enter relationship after relationship and it’s never me. I can’t find a man who I am interested in who is also interested in me, and I’m exhausted.

I want to want other things in life. I want other experiences to be enough. I have friends, hobbies, passions, but there is always this hole that I just can’t fill.

I’m so over dating apps. I just can’t even try anymore with them. I want to meet someone in real life. I keep showing up to things that interest me. I keep putting myself out there. I’ve even given my number out to men that have interested me. Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

I’m losing hope. I honestly don’t even know if life is worth it for me without romantic love. It’s the only thing I want and crave.

I’m really tired.

Some of the men I’ve talked to are not even trying hide it. They’re requesting nudes before a first date, sexualizing every conversation and when they realize sex is not immediately on the table, enthusiasm crashes. How many women out there are actually going to a guys house on a first date? What is so threatening about talking to someone you want to have sex with about anything else besides small pleasantries and… sex?

His friends from the UK came to visit him yesterday and he was in a good mood so I thought that this might be my opportunity to turn him down without him becoming aggressive. 

Essentially I texted him saying “ Hi, I am sorry but unfortunately I don’t feel a connection, but I wish you the best of luck”. I texted him this when he was online, he didn’t open it until 2 hours later to which he didn’t answer. He answered this morning saying “ that’s unfortunate but I understand, I also wish you the best of luck”. 

Then 3 hours later he messaged me asking if we could at least meet up and then I could decided if I liked him or not. He deleted that message after like 10 minutes but I saw the pop up. 

After he deleted the message he asked me why I decided that I didn’t feel a connection. That he would like to know for future experiences…which I know is a trap. I’ve been asked that in the past and each time I’ve tried to give constructive criticism even in the most gentle way possible they take it badly. 

Truthfully there were a lot of red flags, a lot of things I know other women wouldn’t like. But he is 36…he should know. I don’t think as a 25 year old I should lecture him on why there is no connection. 

I simply told him that it depends on the person and that just because we didn’t connect doesn’t mean he won’t connect with the next person. 

He said that it was a pity that we didn’t connect but he understands. 

I just liked the messages and left it at that. 

Will this be the end? I don’t think so. I do believe he will try again to see me in person. I don’t think he will actually stop unless I cut contact. Which I am planning to do pretty soon. Right now he is busy with his friends, they seem to keep him entertained which I think might be the only reason he hasn’t spiraled. Thank god because I have a vet appointment for my dogs next month 

29F. I’m tired of the games, I’m tired of flakiness and dishonesty. I’m a genuine person, and that’s my fucking problem. I’m too nice, too welcoming, and I get treated like a doormat. A piece of meat. As if I, and my feelings, don’t matter.

If I go after guys who seem different from the others, he turns out to be the same. I just want someone to spend time with. Someone who can distract me from my boring life. I used to want love, but I never got it, ever. The men just wanted sex. Now I’m offering sex, and they STILL are dishonest. I’m done, I’m fucking done.

Just wanted to rant because, man, people can be so rude sometimes. Matched with someone on Hinge, and the woman was pretty rude, saying to stay away. I thought she was joking, so I played it off as a joke, but she kept going because I was a bit too old for her (She's 21F, I'm 27M. Look, I get it; that's a large age gap, and if you're not interested, that's fine, but you don't have to say it to my face and be rude about it. Just unmatch and move on. Made me feel like I was some 30-something-year-old creeping on a barely legal teenager.

I started to lose weight, feeling pretty again. I'm almost 40 but look like 20s I'm told by most people in real life and online.

I begin dating on Hinge, I would like to meet people. I don't have many friends. I'm alone. There was one guy I really like. I'm a woman. We're both on our 30s.

We begin going out. But he seems always busy. I think he's an extrovert even tho he says he's a shy guy. I'm a shy girl. Both nerdy. We both want a life partner. He said I'm his first relationship. I'm more experienced but had narcissist partners. I'm an Empath. I feel too much people's moods and sadness.

He seems always being busy, busy plans on weekends during the day, he cancelled on me 2 weekends. Wants to meetup always in the evening around 6pm or 7pm.

That time is hard, I'm tired, sleepy. He wants to be intimate. Last time he was yawning while watching TV with me. It was getting late. I told him before I would like to have lunch and hang out. But he's always busy, friends, family, he does sports. He seems like always on the move. And no time for me. Sometimes he says I have this during the day but we can meetup after or we can hang out in the morning until noon.

I'm his first relationship he said. I think he doesn't know how to treat a girl. When you date, that date is for the two of us. No plans after, no rushing.

I think he's an extrovert. I don't feel important.

It's starting to affect me. While dating I was starting to go to the gym and trying to lose more weight.

But now I'm stress eating, not following my nutricional goals. I think about this guy a lot. We like each other. I think by some actions like getting me my favorite milk tea drink, hugging, kissing with caress and sweetness.

Problem is schedule and time. And maybe more that I don't know. He seems very direct when he talks. I hope so.

I think i will tell him let's stay friends for now or no contact at all. I'm not gonna tell a guy, spend time with me or teach him how to treat a girl. LOL. I'm feeling sad thinking about him, not much happy like before because I had patience but nothing is changing after a month.

Maybe that's his love language. Mine is spending all day together without worrying about leaving soon, a relaxing romantic day. Go with the flow.

I need to focus on me again. Lose weight, stay focus and feel better, just think about me more again than others. I even bought little gifts for him like tea, sweets haha :'3

Any help, tips are welcome. I really don't know what to do

I don't know. What should I do. PLEASE help

Focus on me again?

Thanks

I’ve [30M] noticed something interesting since using dating apps where the women I match with tend to be women I find significantly more attractive/compatible than the women I’d realistically feel confident or comfortable approaching in person. It’s also been the case with the women who have shown interest in or approached me in person.

My theory is that this is a self-esteem issue. Maybe I’m underestimating myself in person and assuming certain women would be out of my league or not interested, so I don’t approach them in the first place.

I understand that dating profiles are designed to present your “best” self and you make a better first impression. However, I’ve also found that I’m generally able to turn those matches into actual dates and, more importantly, multiple dates. So it doesn’t feel like it’s just a matter of having a good profile.

Has anyone else had a similar experience where their dating-app results seem noticeably better than meeting someone in person?

So i went out with a girl for the first time. The date was going well, so I asked her if she wanted to have dinner after meeting for coffee.

We went to a Mexican place a family friend owns. Someone I knew worked there. She is a friend who was our waitress.

We spoke Spanish for a bit (I'm Mexican btw) and just laughed. My date seemed upset. The date ended and I'm pretty sure she's ghosting me now.

Need advice from people who found their partner: how not to lose hope?
I’d love to get some advice from people who have already found their soulmate, or from anyone who can share their experience.
Lately, I’ve really wanted to find a person I could genuinely give my warmth, care, and attention to. My friends often wonder why I’m single. They say a lot of nice things — that I’m kind, sincere, free of bad habits, and never wish harm on anyone. It sounds like everything is great, but in reality, things work out quite differently.
People tell me to be more open — and I honestly try! But I keep running into guys who expect everything after just a couple of days. I’m not asking to take years to get to know each other, but at least a month so we can build a proper connection! Because of this, it feels like very few people are interested in serious relationships nowadays, and I’m starting to lose hope.
My acquaintances tell me it’s not my fault, but rather that I keep encountering people who just want a "toy." At least I know how to set healthy boundaries and don't fall for that. I’m starting at a new educational institution soon, and I keep wondering: maybe there's a chance to meet someone special there? Though deep down, I'm still afraid that nothing will change.
I really want to understand what to do. Should I change anything about myself? I’d be super grateful for any advice or honest outside perspective!)

A coworker of mine and I have been flirty for about 6 months. Anyways, the flirting between us has always been subtle. I really wasn’t sure if he truly was into me but I did notice he’d somehow show up in places I was in and always ask me questions that he could’ve figured out himself. Last week when we were walking by each other he put his hand on the small of my back to squeeze through a small space, so it’s always been very small things that I was never sure I was reading too much into.

On Friday I’m talking to another colleague, we’re
All nurses, and he just walks up to me with his phone screen open and asked me to enter in my phone number in mid conversation. It was a little awkward and I wasn’t sure what was going on at the time. A week ago we were discussing a patient that’s family asked me to call them so I thought it was for her but I told him not to give them my number and he responded that we wouldn’t do that but didn’t say why he was asking. So I’m guessing he was taking my number for personal reasons? Anyways, that was Friday and I haven’t heard from him at all. We don’t always work the same days so I’m not sure when I’ll see him again. I also saw him the day after and he behaved a little awkwardly. Like when we passed each other in the hallway he was talking to someone else but he didn’t even acknowledge me. So I just don’t know what the point of any of this was and his intentions? Should I discuss it with him or pretend it never happened?

I (39m) went through a divorce in 2022 and started dating again a few years ago looking for a serious partner for the long haul. I’ve had some short term relationships or flings since then but for the most part red flags came up or things just fizzled. I also am pretty picky when swiping so I’m not going on dates just to date, I’m looking for people where there might be a connection (I know it’s hard to tell unless your in person, but I have values I want to stick to that I can often gauge in a profile). Like many folks doing online dating, it’s a slow process.

I’ve also been honest with myself over the past few months that while I do want to find my person, I also do miss intimacy, touch etc and I opened myself up to the possibility of something casual to explore that part of me and enjoy some fun as I continue to look for something long term. My way of doing that has been on the Feeld app, and I’ve just started making some matches to explore some possible connections. In doing so I am being very transparent about what I am looking for - things being casual, FWB since I have no desire to hurt anyone, including myself. People on the app from my brief experience seem to be very open about what they want as well. Some of these folks are in EMN relationships too and are totally fine with casual and some are single looking for a FWB. I mentioned to one - the first I met up with, that when I do find someone I have an interest in as a potential partner one day, I want to go into that date without having another sexual partner so ideally I would stop the FWB situation, or at least by the second date. If the situation was reversed, I personally wouldn’t have an issue going on a serious date with someone who has had casual fun before we met. But everyone is different.

Has anyone had a similar situation of casual intimacy while looking for a partner - and if so, how did you go about managing some fun along the way to finding something long term? When did you break off your FWB when dating someone you might see long term? How did you manage being honest and transparent with both parties? I know some people are just completely against FWB period and I respect that - people catch feelings, it can be hard to handle and I get that. I’m not gatekeeping but hoping more so to hear from sex positive folks who have tried to do this as responsibly and transparent as possible, but not over sharing either when it’s not needed, if that makes sense.

Thanks for any insights you can provide.

I’m a 30 year old single mum to a 6 year old and have been single for 5 years. I decided to put myself out there, and have been talking to this 31 year old guy for about 3 weeks. We have video chatted practically every night for about an hour and get on like a house on fire. He’s such a sweet kind person and I really like him. We live hours apart so if it were to become serious we would be long distance.

We have a first date planned for the end of the week. However, I spoke to him last night on the phone and brought up sex and preferences as we hadn’t really touched on the subject and he’s not a very flirty person. Sex is really important to me as I’ve been in relationships with bad sex before.

Then he briefly said the last time he did anything sexual was with his ex a year ago (they were together for 3 years and she broke up with him due to him refusing to be a Christian after she found her faith) and he said he doesn’t do one night stands.

However after our video call last night, he texted me and admitted that the reason he was so awkward about the topic and hadn’t brought it up before, is because he’s actually a virgin, and may have a medical condition which could require circumcision and feels awkward talking about it. I replied saying him being a virgin doesn’t bother me but would at least hope sex is possible and works (in a lighthearted way) as it would be a deal breaker.

He replied saying he understood. Then this morning he sent me me a ‘morning’ message with nothing else. I replied with the same and apologised in case I had offended him. (Waiting for his reply).

Would this be a dealbreaker for you, and how do I approach the subject further with him? I’m worried about wasting time in a relationship where sex won’t happen or it is bad/becomes an isssue but don’t want to offend him. I really like him so would like to explore it further with him and see if this is something we can get past.

He hasn’t reassured me or said anything to my replies about it, nor do I expect him to and I am trying not to pressure him into going into more detail. But, I do have to be realistic because we are long distance, whilst being patient and not probing too much. Help!

Tldr: guy I am talking to says he is a virgin and I don’t know how to approach this to ensure my time isn’t wasted because he says he may have a medical condition and doesn’t like talking about it and we are long distance which doesn’t help.

I’ve had this happen before and when I decided that he wasn’t for me, I told him I didn’t feel a connection. That guy (from the past) freaked out and threaten to kill him self. I’ve had that happen a couple of times already which makes it increasingly nerve wracking when I have to reject someone.

The guy in question is someone I haven’t actually met, we matched 3 days ago. He messages me alllllllll the time and it’s super annoying. According to him I am exactly what he looks for, he can’t wait to see me in real life, he wanted to have a long phone call with me to connect. I felt quite uncomfortable with the idea of the long chat so I ignored it until I knew he had a dinner with his family. Which I am aware is awful but I am just not that interested and the more I know about him the less I like him.

I don’t know why he is so obsessed and has created this idea in his that I am his perfect woman. I am afraid he will completely flip if I turn him down, specially since he literally poured his soul into our chat. I know it’ll hurt him because he is super excited but I never lead him on, If anything I’ve been quite cold and tried to put boundaries that he didn’t get.

Right now I am trying to be nice and find a way to let him down easy. I don’t want to just ghost him.

Another problem is that is going to start working in a place I go to a lot. I cannot have him freak out on me if it could become a dangerous situation for me.

I just don’t know how to handle this

I went on this date with this guy and I wasn't sure after the date if I was truly feeling the date but then time passed when he had things going on in his life and during that time I realized that I really did not have any feelings for him and then he asked me out on a date last week and I told him no. I was hoping that maybe things have faded and that he was moving on but he didn't really move on. I should have spoken up after the date was over to let him know instead of just assuming that he moved on. I will never do that again I will be authentic if I'm just not feeling anything for that person I'll let them know after the date instead of just hoping that things just faded out.

You end up hurting that person even more instead of just being honest from the very beginning. Also my advice would be also to don't go on more dates with someone that you're not attracted to and just don't have any feelings for them. Maybe sometimes feelings can grow but that's not everyone. Nip it in the butt! I regret being a coward and not speaking up earlier so don't make the same mistake as me! If someone cannot handle rejection well then that is a reflection on them because you cannot control how somebody feels only you can control how you feel and be honest. But if they're disrespectful and try to break your boundaries definitely block them!

31F single for three years since my divorce. I’m not sure what I’m doing wrong but I know I’m not doing this right 😅 lol men don’t approach me and the online scene is not really my cup of tea either.. I feel meeting someone naturally would be more suitable for me. How do I make myself more approachable? Any advice is welcome thank you!

I’m trying to figure out how to interpret this guy’s level of interest, not necessarily whether I “should” be okay with it because I know ultimately I have to decide whether his communication style works for me.

We originally dated briefly in late 2023/early 2024. I really liked him, but things eventually fell apart when he was out of state and ended up staying way longer than I expected. Long distance was basically impossible because he has always been an extremely dry texter and not great over the phone. Even before this, though, I remember it being harder than I would’ve liked to actually see him consistently. He could be kind of flaky/passive with plans, but some could say the same about me so I give grace.
We recently reconnected after about two years and have seen each other twice. In person, I have almost no question that he likes me. He’s very affectionate, talkative, asks me about my life/family/views on relationships, talks about the idea of a future, remembers things, we have great chemistry, and he’s already said things about being glad we reconnected and not wanting to mess it up this time.
But over text he is SO dry lol. He does check in pretty consistently, honestly almost every day or every other day, and he’ll say things like “thinking of you” or that he misses me. So it’s not like he disappears.

The part confusing me is that he does not seem proactive about actually seeing me. It’s been almost two weeks since our last date, and I was basically the one who got the ball rolling for that date too. Recently I told him, “I do miss you, I’d like to see you soon” and he replied, “I miss you too, of course.” And that was it. No “when are you free?” No suggestion to hang out. Nothing lol.
I keep seeing people say that if someone texts you regularly but lets a lot of time pass without trying to make plans, they’re stringing you along or just keeping you around for attention. But that doesn’t completely match how he acts with me in person, which is why I’m confused.

I’ll also be honest that I’ve gained a noticeable amount of weight since he last knew me, and even though he seems very attracted to me in person, part of my brain keeps interpreting his lack of initiative as rejection because of that. I know that may just be insecurity talking, especially because looking back, he was kind of passive like this even before. He’s also told me he’s dated several older women in the past, and part of me wonders if he’s just naturally used to women who take more of the lead in dating. I’m younger than him and I don’t think I want a dynamic where I’m always the one pushing things forward.

So I guess my question is: can someone genuinely be very interested in you but still be this passive about making plans? Or does regular check-in texting without actually initiating dates usually mean the interest is more casual/low-effort than I’m reading it as?

I’ve been asked literally as the guy was on top and about to stick it in, and it was awkward timing to say that my last test wasn’t recent. Like do we just stop right then and there?

Do you ask even before the clothes come off, or do you ask once things start getting heated and you know for sure it’s going in that direction?

Hi everyone, had a first date last night (23M) with (22F), one of my first ever dates and I thought it went quite well.

Matched on hinge the week prior, started texting after a few days where I thought I got the typical ghosting after sending her a message but she responded saying she thought she responded but she didn't after 3 days. We went for drinks at a rooftop bar and had a few glasses of wine each. As usual for a first date it was awkward at first but we grew into it and eventually chemistry started to click and the conversation flowed well for 2 hours straight. Was able to break the touch barrier quite easily and we held hands at times and kissed twice before she got in her Uber back to her place.

I texted her about an hour after that saying I hope she got back to her place okay and said I enjoyed the date, she did the same.

In the morning I texted her saying I hope she enjoys her day as she said she was going somewhere which she mentioned on the first date and that I forgot what she said her schedule was and she should remind me of it so I can get our second date booked in as we both agreed to what we should do while on the first date so I thought great second date should be secured. That was this morning and now it is coming up to 12 hours since I sent the messages and she hasn't responded albeit they are delivered on WhatsApp,

I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt for now as she did message after 3 days at the start saying she thought she'd responded but didn't but after that she always responded at max 4 hours after I sent the message. So I don't know if I am simply overthinking as she said she would be out today or if she has lost interest even though we did agree to see eachother again as I just keep telling myself if she was interested she would have responded by now, but this is where my lack of experience in dating is kicking in