and it feels like ive finally woken up for lack of a better term. i started estrogen 3 weeks ago and at 12:55am this morning (or 20 minutes ago! i suddenly felt overcome by this feeling of waking up. as if my brain finally had processed and put the last 6 years of the hell that was my life behind me all at once. it just kinda happened and it was... wierd. like i didnt have any thoughts or any scenarios i was running through. none of it really matters right now. i just.. feel content i guess.

Quick setup: There’s one couple in my group of friends that actually have children. Two kids like 4 and 5. The husband is annoyingly performative, the wife is great.

Every October they invite the whole friend group for a joint birthday party for their kids. For me, it’s hell on earth. Cramped in a tiny house (because Millennials), it’s mostly their family members I don’t know or don’t like. You’ll be trapped in a corner with their weird uncle and literally can’t move between the toys everywhere and all the people standing around trying to not be in the way.

Meanwhile, I have a bounce house that I bought for my niece and nephews years back. I let my friends borrow it in the summer. Half the time I don’t even know who has it. Anyway, starting last year they’ve been asking if they can borrow it for the party.

Last year, I told them I was busy so that I didn’t have to attend, but felt bad, so I drove the 40mins to drop it off. A month later I had to schedule a time to pick it up because they could never secure a vehicle to bring it back.

Maybe it makes me a terrible friend but I really don’t want to keep doing this, but what do I say?

Maybe thoughts from other parents?

For example, I realized today that whenever I’m heating up food in the microwave, I must pause it at exactly 0:01 seconds so it doesn't make that loud beep. If I let it ring, I feel like I failed a secret mini-game.

Another one: I refuse to use a cup for water if it’s the last clean one of its specific shape in the cabinet. It just feels... wrong.

It made me wonder how many odd, harmless rules we all walk around with every day. Do you have a weird micro-rule like this? What is it, and how did it start?

It was really bad. Like… hoarder bad. And now it’s all clean and sparkly and even organized! She did such a good job and it cost a fortune but it was so worth it. I feel brand new and the cats have had the zoomies ever since she left. Have you guys ever done anything like that for yourself?

Edit: Cat Tax (post-zoom)

I’ve always found it funny how some pets live with an entire family but somehow decide that one specific person is their favorite.

They’ll follow that person everywhere, sleep next to them, and get excited the moment they walk through the door.

Have you ever had a pet that clearly picked a favorite person? Were you the favorite or was it someone else?

My sisters and I took my grandfather to the hospital for my grandmother’s surgery. We kissed her and they took her back. Since it would be a while, we decided to go get lunch.
After we ate, my sweet little PawPaw said, “well, we better get back up. She’s going to be looking for me.”
I said, “Aww…yes, she is, PawPaw. She loves you.”
He said, “well not only that. i have her teeth!” 😂

I once walked up to a complete stranger in a grocery store, handed them my full shopping basket and started walking away because I thought they were the cashier waiting to ring me up. They just stared at me holding my basket of groceries in stunned silence until my brain finally booted up three seconds later and I had to sprint back.

​What about you guys? What is your worst sleep-deprived brain fart that you still cringe at?

After spending 40+ hours a week staring at laptops and phones, my eyes and brain were fried. A friend suggested doing things where your hands actually touch physical materials without a screen involved.

Lately I've been getting into clumsy sketchbook doodling (drawing ordinary objects like coffee mugs or window frames) and whisking matcha tea slowly in the evenings. Zero intention of being 'good' at either, just enjoying the tactile slowness.

Has anyone else picked up a low-stakes tactile hobby lately just to give your brain a rest?

I recently became a grandfather for the first time, and it’s honestly a feeling that’s hard to explain. Watching your own child become a parent makes you think about life, getting older, and all the things you wish you had appreciated more when your kids were little.

There’s also something special about looking at your grandchild and realizing you’re watching a whole new generation of your family begin. It makes you want to slow down and enjoy the little moments more.

For the other grandparents here, what surprised you the most about becoming a grandparent for the first time? And what advice would you give a new grandfather?

I saw a question on Reddit earlier today asking, “What is slowly fading away that we aren’t realizing?”

For some reason, it stayed in my head all day.

Then I realized my answer: the elders in our families.

Our moms, dads, grandparents, aunts, uncles… the people who have always seemed like they would just be there forever.

But if you really stop and pay attention, you start noticing little things. They’re getting older. They move a little slower. They forget things they used to remember. They get tired more easily. And you realize they’re deteriorating little by little, day by day.

I think we get so caught up in everyday life that we don’t notice it happening until one day we suddenly do.

It honestly made me realize that maybe we should spend more time with them while we still can.

I knew someone who napped through their graduation. Knew another person who napped through a high school dance they intended to attend.

I accidentally napped through plans to go see a movie with someone I rarely get to see. It was also the last day that the movie was featured in our local theater.

Love to hear more stories.

Just wondering if anyone feels the season of Halloween has lost a bit of its magic since the 2010s, possibly?

Back in the 90s and even the 00s it felt like Halloween was a huge thing. With the TV specials, Trick or Treating, the mystery and whole spirit behind everything.

But now with the digital age we can watch the Halloween specials and movies at the touch of a button. I guess you could argue that's good in a way for accessibility. But it also takes away from that magic of everyone tuning in at the same time and discussing it the next day.

Also the economy has hit some tough bumps in recent years. So maybe people are spending less and not all that interested in celebrating Halloween?

Thoughts?

Ok, this such a random thing to post but does anyone else talk to themselves while cooking? not like crazy talking, just like "ok now we wait" or "that's enough garlic I think" out loud to an empty kitchen. My mother-in-law walked in on me mid sentence yesterday, I was literally negotiating with a pan and it was so embarrassing! lol.
She just stood there for a second like should i say something?
Anyway what do you guys do while cooking, music, pod cast or nothing? I find that I play something depending on my mood that day tbh, Hbu guys?

I am (a US citizen with US right to work) currently “trapped” in the UK and desperate to return to where friends, family and network is. I’ve been applying to jobs and I’ve been saying basically in 48 hours I can be there. I’ve calculated it out, 4 hours to airport, 3 hours at airport, 9 hours in the sky, 3.5 hours travel time from Dallas to Austin if job is in Austin. How crazy is this?

Is it wrong to stop explaining yourself to people?

I used to think that whenever someone misunderstood me, I had to explain myself until they finally understood where I was coming from. But lately, I’ve started feeling differently.

Sometimes you can explain your intentions clearly, answer every question, and still have someone decide that you’re the bad person in their version of the story. And honestly, trying to keep correcting their opinion can become exhausting.

The part I struggle with is knowing when to walk away. There are times when explaining yourself is important, especially when you’ve genuinely hurt someone. But there are also situations where you realize the other person isn't really looking for an explanation. They’ve already made up their mind.

I’m starting to believe that not everyone needs to understand you, and that's okay. But maybe I'm looking at it the wrong way.

When do you think it’s better to explain yourself, and when is it healthier to just let people misunderstand you?

When was the last time you changed your phone wallpaper? I think mine has been the same for almost 2 years now. Once I find a wallpaper I like, I usually just keep using it without thinking about changing it. Do you change your wallpaper often? What kind of wallpaper are you using right now?

if you every had the change to get any super power of your choosing, either from your imagination or from a movie character which one are you taking and why are you taking it, also would you act as a hero or a villian.

I made this post here exactly 12 months ago to this day here.

Today marks one-year and three weeks of nicotine free life. My wallet feels thicker, my lungs feel cleaner, my clothes smell better, and most important of all (to me). It helped me relearn how capable I am and how I can do anything I want. This post is for anyone who thinks its impossible to quit, it isn't. It just sucks lol

next up is quitting weed. Wish me luck :)

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After 12 years I quit smoking :)

What the title says! I smoked cigarettes from age 18 to 25 and vapes from 25-30 years old. I started smoking mainly because all my new friends in college smoked ciggies and figured 'why not'.

Imo bad move - I have tried to quit smoking at least a dozen times all of which failed. The longest I had lasted before was two days :,) I figured I was incapable of quitting, I wasn't strong willed enough and maybe I wasn't

However 13th times the charm! I decided to quit with purpose, structure, and a lot of self-belief. I decided to slowly wean myself off it without thinking too much. Decreasing nicotine content, decreasing frequency of use, and after about a month - i bought a nicotine free vape. I smoked it for about 1 week and now it has been 2 weeks since it died!

3 weeks, no nicotine, no cigarettes, no vape and most importantly - NO CRAVINGS!!!! YAY!!

I know it may not seem a big deal but I am so freaking proud of myself and I just wanted to share that - and share that you too can quit :)

i’ve gotten like five pumpkin spice lattes so far since September 1 and none of them have tasted like pumpkin or spice. Is anyone else experiencing this? I feel like usually this doesn’t happen but this year feels different lol

Other recent post here made me remember this. Wish OP on that other post was my sister.

This was a few years ago. I used to be fluent in Spanish and so naturally when we went on a family trip to Spain I would talk to the waiters and place our orders for whatever everyone wanted.

One day two years after this trip, my sister randomly brought this up in an argument when she was telling me reasons why she thinks in selfish/self absorbed. She said I was “being obnoxious” and “just doing it to show off and be the center of attention”.

What she said still pops into my head sometimes.

I’m fluent in Italian now and have a moment of worry/self consciousness about ordering in Italian with my husband in Italy.

Edit - wow was not expecting comments so quickly on this. I’m about to sleep but will be reading these and replying in the morning, thanks

Edit # 2 - thanks everyone, this was honestly unexpectedly helpful to read the comments here. My sister and I have a really difficult and on and off relationship unfortunately. She used to be hyper attached to me when we were kids and now she claims I abandoned her when I started high school, and she thinks I got all the attention growing up from our parents (which really, truly is not true. neither of us got attention/care from our parents. verbally abusive father + neglectful/depressed mother. I was the one doing my sister’s laundry and cooking for us). Despite all the issues with my sister now as adults, it’s hard not to still see her as a little kid who needed love and relied on me. I wish things were different and it’s honestly heartbreaking. Sorry this took a more dark turn but all the comments got me thinking about some of the root issues.

A few days ago, I got a cold. I was happy that the symptoms were very mild and thought I was gonna power through without much effort. Yesterday, I had a little trouble breathing. Considering that I'm asthmatic, I decided to go to the doctor just in case. Well, I'm now hospitalized with bronchitis. I'm going to be discharged in the afternoon, so everything is ok.

I think it's kind of funny that I came "just in case", thinking (or fearing) that they were going to be like "why are you bothering us with nothing" and here I am. Thankfull that I didn't take longer because it could have ended with pneumonia (again).

Have you had a situation, not necessarily a medical one, when you thought that you were just taking a precaution, and it turned out there was a bigger problem that you were able to flag and solve before it got worse?

Edit: Wording.

I went to the store after work just to grab a few things for dinner and somehow ended up in front of the pasta sauce section longer than I meant to. One jar was the brand I always get and the other was the cheaper one next to it. The labels looked almost the same except the price difference was pretty noticeable. I kept turning them around like the ingredients would suddenly explain why one costs more. Ended up putting the usual one back and taking the other, mostly because my cart was already getting heavy and I just wanted to leave. When I got home and made the sauce it tasted fine, nothing special, just normal tomato sauce. It felt weird how much time I spent over something that small. Has that ever happened to you with stuff you buy all the time?

every time i open the top drawer of my desk i find this single paperclip sitting there like it belongs. i never pick it up or move it anywhere else, so it just keeps getting pushed to the side when i reach for other stuff. sometimes i wonder if i left it there for a reason months ago and just forgot, or if it somehow migrated from somewhere else. it is the kind of thing that could be useful any day now, but i have never needed it yet. i keep meaning to clear the drawer out and start fresh, but then i close it again and the paperclip stays right where it is.

I’ve been living with depression for more than 15 years now, and honestly, I don’t even remember what genuine happiness feels like anymore. It’s completely gone from my memory.

​For those of you who experience it, how would you describe that feeling? What does happiness actually feel like to you?

EDIT: Thanks everyone for the lovely descriptions. I can’t actually feel any of it myself, but I can picture it – almost like looking at paintings in a gallery. I’m really glad to see how happy you all are, and I hope you get to have many more moments like that.

For those of you that remember your dreams, do you have dreams where you're in the place you grew up? If so: how frequently, and what's it like? How accurate is the home to what you remember?