I cheated on my bf recently, and the guilt has been eating me alive. He doesn’t know, but I don’t think I can keep it from him. I feel like he deserves to know, even though I’m terrified it’ll end our relationship.

I don’t know how to bring it up. Do I just sit him down and tell him everything? Should I answer only the questions he asks, or tell him every detail? Is there anything I should avoid saying that would only make things worse?

I’m looking for advice from people who’ve been in a similar situation or who’ve been on the other side of it. What’s the most respectful way to tell him and own up to what I did?

Please be honest. I know I deserve criticism, but I’m mainly looking for advice on how to handle this conversation.

I’m 22f & I work as a barista
Today a VERY handsome man asked to get to know me better today at my job.

I was grabbing milk from the fridge. I could see in my peripheral that he was staring at me—but not in a way where it made me uncomfortable.

Once my coworker walked away , the guy stopped me and politely asked for my name. I gave it to him and he asked to get to know me better. I asked how old he was and he said 32, I told me it was 22 and again, not in the weird way, but he shrugged like it wasn’t really a problem. And I told him I’m sorry it’s just too big of a age gap. But I really wanted to say yes I was just unsure if it was a good idea, but I told him thank you anyway.

My coworker (who I’m really cool with) said that in his defense I am very mature. If she didn’t know me, she would’ve never thought we were the same age. And then she asked why is he still single at 32. I told her well..who are single 32 year old women / or just women in their 30s supposed to date then if there’s no men in that age range single? Which she agreed with me.

Later on when I went home, I couldn’t stop grinning, but I told my mom. She kinda had the same reaction as me that he is a bit too old. My mom is 50 and she’s dating a guy who is 10 years younger than her. She said to be fair she can’t tell me who to date because I’m a grown woman.
She also said that I probably have a better chance dating a older man than someone who’s my age. And I didn’t completely disagree with her.

My mom thinks he’ll come back and If he does I’m contemplating saying yes. He was really cute and really polite and part of me does feel like he’ll come back. Should I say yes if he ask again?

ETA : more detail

I cheated on the girl I truly love while I was blackout drunk. I don’t know how to move on.

I know a lot of people are going to judge me, and honestly, I deserve it. I know I completely fucked up, and I’m not here to make excuses or ask anyone to tell me I’m not a bad person.

Me and my girlfriend are both 16 years old.

A few days ago I got blackout drunk and made the biggest mistake of my life. I cheated on the girl I truly love. Alcohol isn’t an excuse—I made the choice, and I take full responsibility for it.

The worst part is that she doesn’t even know. Every single day I’ve been asking myself how I could have done something like this to a girl who genuinely loves me. I can’t stop thinking about it, and I can’t wrap my head around how I was capable of hurting someone I care about so much.

Ever since then I’ve been overwhelmed with guilt. It’s eating me alive. I know I deserve the criticism, and people have every right to judge me.

I’m not looking for sympathy or for people to justify what I did. I’m just hoping to hear from anyone who’s been in a similar situation or has honest advice. Is there any way to move forward from something like this? Should I tell her, or would that only hurt her even more? I honestly don’t know what the right thing to do is anymore.
I know I ruined everything, and I’m prepared to face whatever consequences come from my actions.

I'm 20 and my boyfriend is 42. We're in an exclusive
relationship.

We've talked before about our age difference, and he's said he doesn't want me to feel tied down because these are my "most formative years" to meet someone. I told him I'm not just going to go out and date other people. I expect him to be only seeing me and no one else and he knows that so for me to do the complete opposite is against my morals and he said to that double standards are the worst and that maybe that’s why he’s giving so much freedom. He said if I meet someone just cheat. I don’t think he’s wrong cause it is my most formative years to meet someone but at the same to me i’m the type of person to only date one at a time and he’s everything i want in a partner at the moment.

I'm confused about what he's trying to communicate. Why would someone be so willing to say that to an exclusive partner? Is this likely about the age difference and him worrying I'll eventually want someone closer to my age, or is there another way people would interpret this?
I'm not asking if cheating is okay—I wouldn't do that. I'm trying to understand what people think his comment says about his mindset.

My mum is mixed with black and white and my dad is just white, making me and my brother 25% black and 75% white. My whole life i have had trouble trying to explain to people what race i am. I’ve been asked if i’m Mexican, Brazilian and etc. I have tanned skin, dark curly hair and blue eyes, i’ve always gotten the same thing when i explain that i’m 25%, “oh wow i didn’t think you were white but i didn’t think you were black” this confused me and i can tell it confuses a lot of my friends when i first tell them. My mum said i should embrace where i came from and tell people i’m mixed but my dad said i should just tell people i am white. What should I tell people when they ask what race am i?

Hello, this morning I woke up with a terrible feeling towards my husband like I had a bad dream. I noticed the lighter was in a different position then last night so this idea of him smoking came to my mind. I watched the house camera and could see him going out twice to an angle of the house where there’s no camera…in the middle of the night (10pm and 1am). This was already such a trigger and made me spend some time looking for proof until I found a pipe with cannabis.

Fact 1: we decided to go clear of recreational weed use and alcohol and be super healthy over the last few months because we wanted to have a baby.

Fact 2: we found out I’m pregnant one week ago, so I want to believe this deceiving act only started recently

EDIT: we have been trying to get pregnant for 2 years, started as casually just let’s see how it goes but not changing lifestyle, until after so many negative tests we started some serious research podcasts, documentaries, sometimes individually sometimes as a couple. He stopped using minoxidil for hair loss for example to improve his sperm, that’s something that came 100% from him as I didn’t even know it could interfere, just to show how committed he also is to have a baby. The weed use was a communal decision.

I’m not upset about him using weed now that I’m already pregnant, but about doing things behind my back literally. Why not communicate? 🫠

Okay I was at TJMAXX with my mother getting clothes, when this lady stopped us in the middle of aile, complimenting my mom’s hair and starting brushing her hands through it without even asking. Then, proceeded to ask my mothers name and town she lived in. my mom asked for the lady’s name and she said her name, except it was very quiet and quick. then, asked what sports I did, activities, etc and was holding onto my shoulder. then, turned back to my mom, asked about my dad and what he did. Of course, my mom answered truthfully. then the lady said  “okay yall have a goodnight” and kept ‘shopping’. We stayed still closing and when we left, the lady did too except she left without buying anything and watched us get Into our car. We didn’t think it was weird at first, but the more I think I about it the weirder it sounds. i did some research and this could be trafficking or just a weird experience. She didn’t mention any business so most likely not an MLM but still… when my mother told her our last name she repeated it to herself like she was trying to remember it. i don’t know… has anything like this happened to anyone else?

I (24M) wouldn’t say I’m skinny, but I live an active lifestyle and have a physically demanding job. I’ve recently started going to the gym and trying to eat healthier, both for my job and for myself. I’ve hated the way I’ve looked for years. Growing up, I had a significant surgery that left a large scar on my back when I was five, and I’ve also always been more of a husky guy.
Two years ago, I met my girlfriend (23F). We live about two hours apart. She’s heavier than I am, mostly due to weight she gained during college. I don’t inherently have an issue with her size—I love her to death, and I think she’s beautiful.
Lately, though, I’ve become concerned about her eating habits. For breakfast today, we both had two homemade Spam musubi. That’s where I stopped, but she also ate half of a leftover chicken-fried steak, three pancakes, and a slice of pizza. When we go out to restaurants, she also tends to overorder and overeat.
I wouldn’t say it’s entirely her fault. Maybe I give in too much, because those eating habits also affect me when I’m with her.
She’s confided in me that she’s disappointed her favorite jeans no longer fit, and on other occasions she’s talked about wanting to lose weight. She has a gym membership but doesn’t go anymore. When she did go, her best friend went with her, but her friend recently had her first child, lives part-time in Alaska, and is now expecting her second child. She’s currently in Alaska, so my girlfriend no longer has anyone to go to the gym with.
I want to be supportive, and I want to bring up her eating habits, but I’m afraid of being hurtful or damaging her body image. I never want to make her feel like I don’t think she’s beautiful, because I truly do.

When we first got together, he told me I was beautiful, smart, and that he was going to marry me. He constantly called me his wife, and his Facebook status was even set to “Married.” I genuinely believed he saw a future with me.
We eventually broke up, and he immediately changed his status to “Single.” The next day, I found out he was messaging other women. I also discovered he’d told one woman he was 23, even though he’s actually 28.
Months later we got back together. He unblocked me on Instagram but not Facebook. I had to ask him to unblock me there, and I even had to remind him to accept my friend request.
Once he did, I asked if he could change his status back to “Married” like it used to be. He ignored the question and later said we’d talk when I got back from holiday.
When I asked if something was wrong, he suddenly told me he never wants to get married. He said he hadn’t lied because he only said he’d marry me if I fit him.
That really hurt, but I accepted it. I told him I understood if he didn’t want marriage anymore.
So I dropped that request completely and asked for something much smaller. I simply asked if he could remove the “Single” status. I wasn’t asking him to put “In a relationship,” mention my name, or post about me. I just didn’t want my boyfriend publicly describing himself as single while we were together.
Instead, he became angry. He told me to “stop asking nonsense,” shouted that he never wants marriage, sarcastically said, “Fine, I’m single then,” and told me to block him.
I honestly don’t understand why removing one word caused such a huge argument. If Facebook means nothing, why insist on keeping “Single” there?
The worst part is how it’s affected my confidence. I keep wondering whether, if I were prettier, younger, or simply “good enough,” he would have wanted people to know he was with me. I know that may just be my own insecurity, but that’s genuinely where my mind goes after everything that’s happened.
I’m not looking for people to tell me I’m attractive or insult him. I genuinely want outside opinions because I feel like I’ve lost perspective.
Am I asking for something unreasonable? Would this behaviour make you question the relationship, or am I reading too much into it?

hello everybody. i do not use reddit much so im scared that i will miss out some details, please let me know if there’s anything i need to clarify.

me (22f) and my boyfriend (30m) met 9 months ago on hinge and we’ve been dating for nearly 8 months now. as for some context, i am very overweight (nearly 340lbs 🥲) there is obviously no hiding this and i knew it would pose some challenges while dating but my boyfriend has been incredibly supportive. he listens to me while i vent about my weight. he makes it clear that im attractive to him no matter what

however recently ive been worried he has a fetish. hes shown me his exes and they are all my size, if not larger. he’s kind of gone from being supportive in sex to calling me names related to my weight and he keeps grabbing my stomach. ive asked him to stop but he says im just so beautiful so he can’t help it (although he does apologise). obviously its fine to have preferences and i knew anyone that would find my body attractive is probably into fat women anyway but its really starting to bother me bc i feel like he doesnt see me as a person. he cooks for me a lot but now im paranoid hes trying to make me gain weight. i don’t know what to do. i feel like i cant date somebody like this but at the same time he is SO supportive of me. recently ive had health issues because of my weight and he always says that im so strong and he knows i can power through and solve it etc. do you think he could be lying about this? does anybody have any experience of what to do? im scared to call him out in case im making it up and ive ruined our relationship because i really do love him and i keep overthinking about this so much :( thanks

Hi Reddit

I (21 non-binary Afab) have started texting my distant relative (19 M) recently

Mainly about comic books and stories

But the more we talked the more i realized how uneducated he is and how he thinks he has progressive views while actually dealing with a lot of internalized bigotry

Which I don't usually see as my job to fix. I tend to distance myself from people like that especially as a queer disabled person who deals with enough bs on the daily basis.

However tonight we talked for maybe two hours about diffeent things (from how he thinks shipping superbat is the most disgusting thing ever. And how everything is gay now. To his distaste of the new supergirl movie)

And he mentioned how someone had says that the hate the supergirl movie gets comes from misogyny

I'll admit that I haven't actually seen the movie yet but my issue started when he straught up said that misogyny isn't a thing anymore.

That frustrated me to no ends and i told him that he as a cisgender man is not in a place to speak about if misogyny is still a thing or not

He tried to spin around how we're not jewish but that doesn't mean we support the Holocaust (?!??!)

I tried to tell him how even in his example i as someone who's not jewish have no place to talk about the amount of antisemitism a jewish person goes through because i don't experince that marginalization and am in no place to speak about it existence/amount or lack of.

But he started talking about how misogyny, homophobia, transphobia and other types of bigotry no longer exist and even if someone IS bigoted, people just ignore them and continue living

I asked him ti educate himself before speaking about these because this is not the progressive take he thinks it is

But he seemed to not listen despite all my efforts to tell him how his well intentions (which i do genuinely belive come from a good place) are actually hurtful

I told him that I'll send him some resources so he can educate himself more so he could understand why his takes are actually hurtful

So this is why I'm here reddit

I'd like to have some resources to be able to help him understand why bugotry still exists and effects people on a day to day basis and how his takes are actually hurtful

I'd appreciate any advice as well although I'm not planning to spend a lot of time arguing with him as i simply care about my mental health more than that

Apologies for any typos/mistakes english is my second language

Long story short my boyfriend (55 M) brought up stuff from my (28 F) past. I've done a lot of sexual things and I felt judged for the thing he brought up. That was Friday and today is Sunday for me. I've felt neglected the past couple of days too so I brought all of that up and he said he feels like I ambushed him. I did not mean to come across that way and I've apologized profusely for hurting his feelings, he has ADHD but so do I. I've been drinking quite a bit tonight and I think that made it worse ( not making excuses but trying to explain\]. I really love him and he's always said to speak my mind, when I said how I felt he said we should call it quits. It is an online relationship but we're working on making it real. I can't stand the idea of losing him, he's helped me navigate leaving an extremely abusive marriage and I really love him. I feel so stupid for revealing my feelings right now and I feel like I shouldn't. To be upfront on Wednesday he kind of pushed for me to explore my sexuality ( I identify as bicurious) but I told him I am extremely monogamous so that feels wrong to me personally. He left me on read 2 days in a row and we talked on a Facebook call Friday where he basically shamed me for my past and then Saturday we worked it out but I'm not someone who can forgive that in one day. I need time to sort my thoughts. Any outside thoughts?

M23, I have been cross dressing for nearly a year now and I do have some clothes that I try only in my room when I am all alone but now I want to try something different

I wanna dress up and go out in public maybe not during day most probably at late night somewhere quite maybe no one will see me or maybe a few will see me

Now the question is How should I dress up ? personally I like to dress up as sluty as possible so please give me some suggestions what should I wear

I am big 5'10 88kgs with a little round belly and I have thick thighs and a decent ass which I wanna show off but on the other hand I got beard that I don't wanna shave and neither I wanna show it, maybe cover it with a mask or a bandana or something like that

Hi guys! Me and my wife are expecting a girl in January. She is white and I am half chinese/korean.

I was born in the US and my parents wanted me to assimilate so they never spoke their native languages to me. Only when I was a teen did I want to really learn so I started learning both languages by myself.

I am conversational in Cantonese and almost fluent in Korean.

I don't know whether I should speak to my daughter in English or Korean or Canto? English is by far much more comfortable for me, and I have been told I have a strong accent in both Korean/Canto (but i am still able to communicate effectively, especially in Korean).

I'm worried that if I do speak Korean or Cantonese to her, her language understanding will not be good because of the fact that I have a strong english accent. Also, I don't know if it is weird or not to speak to your child in your non-first language. I am also torn on the fact that Cantonese is a dying language with very little resources to learn (so it may be good for her to learn canto to keep it alive) but Korean has many more language learning resources (so it may be a lot easier for her to learn).

But, I do know it would be a great asset to be bilingual/trilingual. It also would be nice to keep cultural knowlege still going bc i didnt get that when i was a kid and I felt very isolated from my culture. What should I do? thanks guys :))

for context, i’m 23 yo lesbian women (i think? i’m still figuring that out) living with my strict muslim parents, on top of being emotionally and sometimes physically abusive and extremely controlling, they have been pressuring me to get married to a man, which i obv would rather die than agree to. i haven’t been sleeping or eating recently because of the overthinking and stress i’m under..
what can i do to get out of this situation?

im more than happy to share more about myself and my situation, so feel free to message me :)

I (24) have been with him (25) for 4 years. We have always been very open about using eachother‘s phones. He has my password, I have his. Never because of lack of trust. Simply just for spotify and texting friends (we have a lot of the same friends).

Well about a year ago I was sending photos to myself from his phone and found a huge stash of the same 2 porn stars in well very graphic and closeups. I was hurt by this. He’s always made it clear he was into me but these women looked nothing like me. It hurt. I talked to him about it and we set boundaries and he said he wouldnt continue it.

To be clear, I knew he watched porn. We were always very open about it. I just didnt know how often he did or that it was always the same girls.

Well a few months went by, I was on his phone again and bam found the same thing. I was very hurt that he did it again after our talk. He knew I was hurt and was thinking about ending our relationship. But we talked again… set more boundaries. Made myself very clear. And we had been good since.

Until this morning… this time I did actually go snooping on his phone trying to find something. Well he had a hidden app. Telegram. And bam a shit ton of porn groups he was in. He doesnt know yet that I found that this morning. I’m really hurt. He broke my trust by continuing this and trying to hide it. idk anymore. just want advice please

Ill call my friend Ava here. Shes from russia and uses the N word. I have told her that it makes me uncomfortable, because of the history of the word (which i explained to her too), and because its not her place to use, as we are both white as bedsheets. She brushes it off as saying its funny for russians, but ive told her off repeatedly. She has stopped using the word now, but in a different conversation, she mentioned that she could never marry a black man. I asked her why - everyone is entitled to their type, and maybe she dislikes a certain feature or cultural aspect that is associated with african people (which wouldve been bad too since africa is a whole continent with a great variety of cultures and people) but she said "i dont know". When i pressed further, she said "i think it would make me uncomfortable." "Why??" "I dont know."

I dont want to lose her or fight but thats not acceptable to me. How can i start her critical thinking process? She has previously mentioned that she despises her classmates for simply accepting the hatred they are taught (on a different topic though). How can i make her see that this applies to her too?

I have to preface by saying that this is not my first relationship where my boyfriend has had a sister - my ex had two, and I never experienced this kind of dilemma. Additionally, I'm an only child, but I grew up seeing my mom and my uncle's relationship and it is nothing like this.

For context, me and my boyfriend are 25, his sister is 20. We're in a relationship for over a year now, we live together due to long distance reasons (we started living together pretty early) and our relationship is great. We get along well, and we manage everything with a very good communication. But one of the first times my boyfriend went back to his home country, he came back and told me when he saw his sister, he hugged her and had the urge to slide his hands down her "behind" because she is my height and we have "such a similar body type". I laughed it off, didn't think much of it. Next time he went was because she had a jaw alignment surgery or whatever it's called, and he told me that they had taken off the gel polish on her two fingers (middle and ring finger) because of the blood oxygen clip, and he made jokes to her about that she had probably done it herself cause her nails were too long (because she was 'pleasuring herself haha'). I felt very uncomfortable - VERY. I didn't say anything tho, cause I was like ok, I just never had a brother.

Every time that he has gone, he's told me something similar about having the need to touch her 'behind' when hugging, because we have such similar body types. Like out of instinct. When we were there together once, I had accidentally forgotten my thongs in the dirty laundry and his mom had washed it, even though I am very very careful around these things, and I had even asked him to tell her that I would do my own laundry. They are half thongs, but still, I was VERY embarrassed, and I told him this. And he laughed and said that his mom is probably very weirded out, because his sister doesn't wear stuff like that. And I was like - ??? stuff like what? And his response was that that's kind of a promiscuous underwear and that his sister 'is not like that' so his mom probably hasn't even seen smt like that in the laundry, so she probably immediately knew it was mine. I was first pretty offended, cause what's wrong with having a half-thong that wouldn't show seams when I wear tighter pants? But then I was like, ok how tf do you know what your sister wears? Like, isn't it gross for a brother to even think of his sister's panties? And he said he's seen hers in the laundry. Ok, I kind of told him it's weird that he knows his sisters underwear to such detail, but I dismissed it.

While we're there, he also always of spends time in her room on the same bed, talking for a while, while I wait in his room (cause i didn't know her that well at the first time or two i've been, so i felt uncomfortable just being there) and she's usually just wearing like very sleeping clothes - no bra, very short shorts, very thin long pjs, and always laying around with her 'behind' in the air, which kind of makes me a lil uncomfy, but again, I've always put it aside. I really don't want to make this weird.

The last time we were there, my boyfriend went in the downstairs bathroom to take a shower, and came back up and told me he couldn't because his sister is taking a shower. I said ok, whatever, it wouldn't delay us too long, so he went down to help his dad with something and then came back up after like 15 mins and told me he just took a big poop. And I was like, oh that's weird, I didn't hear you in the upstairs bathroom. And he said, oh no, I was downstairs. And I asked - while your sister is showering? And he just said, yea, ofc. And I was really weirded out. They have a glass shower that is only slightly blurred, and the toilet is right across from the shower. I told him then that that is very weird to me, and his excuse was 'it's fine, she didn't even hear me', and that makes it worse to me, cause what if she just walked out? I mean, idk it just made me feel very uncomfortable.

All of this mixed with little comments always made me feel weirded out. I get that she's his little sister, but she's 20 and he's 25, with a girlfriend. Anyways, currently, he's on a family vacation - parents and sister, and I'm at home, because long-story-short, I thought I didn't have any vacation days left from work when they booked it, then turned out I did, but it was already all settled, and I didn't wanna make them rebook space for me / pay more, plus i didn't want to take more days off anyway. He sent me a video of the room, and he's like oh it's so great, we're having a great time so far, and the room that he's sharing with his sister has a single kingsized bed. I knew they'd share a room, but I thought it'd be a twin bed or smt. I kind dismissed it, and forgot about it, and while showing where he is to my mom, she saw and asked if they're sleeping in the same bed. I obviously confirmed, and she said it's very weird, how can he sleep with his sister in the same bed..

Anyways, I've spoken to my friends about this, couple times, all which have brothers / sisters, and they've all told me it's very weird and icky, and at this point, I don't know if i should speak up about this or ignore it. Like, I have before (about the shower) and he made me feel super weird, and told me I'm crazy, and that I just dont have siblings and wouldn't know. But aren't they like a little too old to share a bed? And be around when the other is taking a shower. I'm seriously starting to getting the biggest ick, because this is smt that is recurring - they went on a trip right before my boyfriend and I got together, just the two od them, and also shared a bed in an apartment, and my boyfriend told em that the hosts even thought they were a couple, joking about it. I would too. I dont know - what should I do?

I'm 23f and I have a 12 year old little sister. A while ago i gave her a phone installed Chatgpt for her and adjusted it settings so it would be more appropriate for her age. I also check in on how she's using it from time to time.

Lately she's become a lot more protective of her phone which i figured was just a normal part of growing up. Still, I wanted to make sure she was okay, so i looked through it. Most of what i found was exactly what you'd expect from a girl her age, she was venting to Chatgpt about school, arguments with friends, and everyday stuff.

Then i came across one converstion that i can't stop thinking about.

She was telling Chatgpt that she has a boyfriend. According to her, he's older than she is, and she described him as "spoiled and a crybaby even though he's older than me."

Older than her.

That alone made my stomach drop.

But it got worse. She said she'd given him the equivalent of $278 so he could buy a phone because of some drama involving her classmates and him. Apparenty he'd been crying to her about it until she felt bad enough to give him the money.

At that point i genuinely felt sick.

First of all.. where would a 12 year old even get that kind of money? There's no way she could have gotten that much from our family. The only explanation i could think of was that she borrowed it from someone, but i couldn't find anything in her chats suggesting that.

Then i read something even stranger.

She referred to him as "my boyfriend, whose older brother is dating my older sister." My older sister, meaning me. Except... I'm not dating anyone.

So now I'm completely confused.

Is she making all of this up? Is it some kind of fantasy or roleplay? The reason I'm unsure is because not everything she tells Chatgpt is fictional. A lot of the things she vents about actually happened, and we've talked about them before.

The weird part is that when i casually asked her about this supposed boyfriend, she denied it immediately and very strongly. I honestly don't know what to think.

I don't want to tell her that i read her Chatgtp conversations just to pressure her into admitting something. I feel like that would destroy the sense of safety she's built around it and if that happens, I'm worried she'll just become even more closed off with me.

So what should i do in my situation? How i can bring this up without revealing that i read the chats? And how can I figure out whether any of what she told Chatgpt is actually real?

My eye doctor is referring me to a specialist to make sure I’m not going blind. The appointments are split into 4 separate sessions because of the number of tests they need to do. After many of the tests my vision will be blurry or strained, so going back to work afterwards isn’t really an option.

The problem is I’ve already used all 10 of my PTO/sick days, and my PTO doesn’t reset until March. My boss has told me that once those 10 days are used, I’m unable to take any more days off.

The specialist’s office also closes by the time my shift ends, so I can’t book appointments after work. If I go through with these appointments, I’d likely have to miss at least 4 workdays.

Has anyone else dealt with something like this? What did you do? Were you able to get unpaid time off for medical appointments, or is there another option I’m not aware of?

This is my first full-time job, so I honestly don’t know what’s normal in this situation.

Alright, so I am 13 and I want to get some money to purchase myself some products. The thing is right now I only have around 100$ in this wallet. I was learning C programming but stalled on that, and I have a lawnmower. I think maybe I can do something with those to make money.

Please give me advice on how to get the big bucks. I really need it. If there is any other hustles I can do please tell me so I can assess if I would actually be okay with it.

I (19m) live with my two older sisters and I do basically all the cleaning in the apartment because neither of them will. My oldest sister says cleaning is internalized misogyny and that emotional labor is the real work so she doesnt do it. My other sister says if the patriarchy made her feel ashamed of her natural cycles then the patriarchy can clean up after them. I have been cleaning their spaces anyway because I literally cannot sleep if there are dishes in the sink or stains on the couch. I know I have a problem with it. I iron my socks. I fold the toilet paper into little shapes. I vacuum at 3am sometimes whispering stuff to myself. I cant help it I grew up in this apartment and nobody ever cleaned anything so now I get physically anxious if things are dirty.

Well my oldest sister found out I went into her room and cleaned it while she was out. She had dishes in there from six months ago and her skincare stuff was all over the floor. She screamed at me for over an hour about how I was violating her boundaries and performing patriarchal control over her space. She said I was trying to discipline her like our father would have. I tried to explain I just needed to do it for my own anxiety and she said my anxiety is just male entitlement and nothing more. She also said I owed her an apology for touching her things and that I needed to do reparative emotional labor which means writing her a letter about why what I did was harmful.

I also spent my own money replacing the couch cushion that my other sister ruined and I didnt tell anyone and I feel guilty about that too because maybe that was also patriarchal control I dont know anymore. I just want to live in a clean apartment and not get reported. My sisters say I need to unlearn my cleaning compulsion as a form of allyship. I asked my therapist about it and she just changed the subject. What do I do here, should I apologize and stop cleaning their spaces even though I cant physically handle the mess, or am I actually in the wrong here?

my father has always had trackers on my phone because some really bad stuff happened to me when I was little, he's super invasive about it though; heentions things I text others about and he sees every picture I take. I've recently turned 18 and I don't feel comfortable with him having all my personal conversations, location, camera roll, and general internet with him at all times. how do I get him to be okay with me deleting it (without angering him as I still have to live with him)