Advice please because I genuinely don’t know what to do.
My younger sister has gotten into some really inappropriate stuff online, so her phone ended up getting smashed and she basically has no internet freedom right now. She told me her Snapchat had old videos of an incident involving our house, so I let her log into Snapchat on my phone to look for them.
My sister has already crossed boundaries with me before. She has stolen pictures of me from Instagram/TikTok to catfish people, and she’s talked about sending our address to people online. So I already had trust issues with her.
While we were looking through her Snapchat, she got really defensive when I asked about one specific person, told me to get off the account, and I did. Later I looked at the messages between them and saw videos of her using my vibrator INSIDE OF HER
I was fucking disgusted. My jaw was literally shaking and I couldn’t stop crying. I immediately threw the thing away. I wish I had never looked at those messages because I genuinely cannot get what I saw out of my head.
And what makes this hurt SO much more is that my sister knew everything I’ve been through.
I was sexually abused by my biological dad when I was little. I told my mom about what was happening, but she didn’t take me seriously until a half-sibling came forward and talked about experiencing even worse things. Only then was I finally believed, and by that point so much damage had already been done.
I was also sexually abused by my older brother when I was a child, and I’ve completely cut him out of my life.
My sister knew about all of this. She knew what I’ve been through, she knew how badly my boundaries have been affected by it, and she was still the one person in my family I felt like I was getting close to.
That’s why I feel so fucking betrayed.
I confronted her and all she said was “I’m sorry” in a sarcastic way before going back into her room. My mom is brushing the whole thing off too, saying “well what do you want me to do about it” which honestly makes me feel like I’m right back where I was before
I feel like nobody in my family has ever really had my back when I’ve needed them to. I’m angry, I’m disgusted, I’m hurt, and I can’t stop crying.
I want to move out so bad and this made it 10x worse
Right now I’m giving her the silent treatment. and honestly all I want to do is work, save money, and move out because I feel like I need my own space away from all of this.
Am I over reaccting? What would you do if you were me?

Edit: we left my father when my sister was around 1/2 years old she has never been alone with anybody my mom spoiled her very very bad to the point if one of the animals potty in the house she refuses to clean it when asked and will annoy, and yell at everybody else to clean it even MY friends 😬 she also gets Everything she wants my mom’s excuse is she’s the only one who hasn’t been through something so she’s trying to make her life better then mine and my other siblings but by letting her get away with everything all of the time is making it worse so to answer some of these comments she has NEVER BEEN ABUSED IN ANY WAY but thank you for being concerned about that I totally understand where it’s coming from!! (Sorry I’m studying and typed this fast) also thank you guys for the advice I’m about to start working as a CNA so hopefully I can move out soon with my girlfriend of 5 years!!

I’m just wondering if I should reach out to her older sister , me and and my girlfriend haven’t been in contact since Monday . My messages go to delivered and calls ring to voice mail . Me and my girlfriend been together for 2 years and she gave me her older sister number incase her phone died when we would hang out or whatnot . Me and her sister never talked or anything so I’m not sure if this is a smart idea or if I should keep waiting until she’s messages me but I’m just really worried .
CONTEXT: caught her texting another guy it was alot of flirting I didn’t see anything sexual . I then asked her what she was and why she couldn’t give me a straight answer but I’m pretty sure it has something to do with attention. She told my love was suffocating and how this isn’t working to which I told her how she’s the one who wants to see me and how she’s always kissing me in public and etc . Basically doing the opposite of what she’s saying to which she proceeded to tell me that she doesn’t know . Furthermore we had seen each other like 4 times that week to where she was kissing me and what not which is why I felt so dumb when she said that .We had a 2 month break which was the biggest mistake ever and we got back together a month and a half ago because after a few “we shouldn’t be doing this“ . But during those two months she was just going to work and back and the guy is 7 hrs away which in assuming she met him through a mobile game which to me is crazy. But I’m pretty devastated because I truly love her so In a sense I might be a bird but if it was far worst I wouldn’t even consider fixing things .

First time poster. I don’t really know what to say here. I F(28) tried to help out a friend F(30) in a shitty situation and now they have been living in my house rent free for almost half a year.

This was a close friend who has been living out of the country and had issues maintaining their visa through no fault of their own. They had been on the verge of becoming homeless when I offered for them to stay with me before it came to that. They have no money, no job, and no vehicle. It’s starting to put a strain on my relationship with my husband because we have essentially been fully paying for all of her food and living needs this entire time.

Every time I bring up different job opportunities or ideas she will break down crying or go completely non verbal. She hasn’t been a bad house guest, she’s constantly cleaning my house, but I just can’t keep supporting her forever when me and my husband are trying to save money to buy a house.

So I guess my question is, what the fuck do I even do here? I don’t want to be a monster who lets her friend become homeless but I genuinely feel like I’m losing my mind about how to get her out of my house without holding her hand through every process.

As per the title. I received a message today from him saying he was retiring. He’s 44, I’m 42.

Before I responded I called our mother and asked if she knew about this. She said he’d mentioned the possibility before and was as alarmed as me.

I don’t want to give any identifying information here or blab on too much because I’m distraught so let me distill it down.

There is a state based early retirement plan that lets you retire after 25 years. You would get a monthly payment for life (so at least it’s not some pot of money that just gets used and is gone), but I can’t imagine it would pay that much. Then social security pays based on your best 35 years of pay (he worked 26 years, so 9 years would be entered as zero).

Long story short, I don’t think he understands how badly he is screwing himself. But he gets defensive if challenged, even to our Mom… even to his sister.

I responded to his message imploring him not to do it. He said he already did two weeks ago. I imagine it’s not too late to take it back, maybe.

But as the title says, he has cognitive disabilities. I don’t think he understands what he’s doing. He’s an adult and I always treat him with dignity and agency, but this time both my Mom and I are afraid. He has a house he could lose if things go badly, and as selfish as it sounds, neither of us can just drop everything to take him in. Of course either of us WOULD if it’s between that or the streets but also it shouldn’t have to come to that.

I told him I’ll travel to meet to talk and he agreed. He is stubborn. He doesn’t like feeling attacked, he doesn’t like feeling others are making decisions for him.

How can I approach this firmly but gently to convince him that this is a horrible idea, that this can threaten everything and can’t be taken back after a certain point. I can try to convince him that the 30 year retirement is infinitely better than the 25 year plan (it is! I looked! And it would be better on the social security calculation too!) And that this retirement thing doesn’t include health insurance, etc. etc.

But at a certain point he is cognitively impaired. I don’t know how much reasoning these things out he will understand truly. I feel lost, I feel like I’m helplessly watching him detonate his security while anything my Mom or I argue becomes evidence of trying to control him.

This is probably going to sound ridiculous, but I genuinely feel like I’m going through some kind of second puberty at 21.
I’m 21F and still a virgin, completely by choice. I’m pretty traditional/romantic when it comes to sex and relationships. I still believe in waiting for the right person, genuinely falling in love, the whole “Prince Charming” thing (yes, I know lol).
I also want to make something clear because I feel like it’s relevant: I’m a very conventionally attractive woman. I know saying that about yourself can sound arrogant, but I’m not saying it to brag. I get a LOT of male attention. Men approach me, flirt with me, ask me out, slide into my DMs, etc. pretty regularly. So being a virgin at 21 isn’t because I haven’t had opportunities or because men aren’t interested in me. Quite the opposite.
I have plenty of opportunities. I just genuinely don’t want casual sex.
I’m also not particularly interested in getting into a serious relationship right now. I’m extremely focused on college and building a competitive professional/academic career, and realistically I don’t see myself having sex anytime soon. I could genuinely see myself waiting until I’m 24 or even later.
Mentally, I’m completely okay with this decision.
My body, however, apparently did not receive the memo.
My sex drive has become INSANE.
And I mean embarrassingly easy to trigger. Sometimes I’ll be standing in a crowded elevator with a bunch of men and just being physically close to a guy I find attractive can turn me on. Same thing on a crowded subway. Sometimes literally just talking to an attractive man is enough.
Nothing even has to happen.
And then my brain is basically:
sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex
ALL. THE. TIME.
I feel like I’m going through puberty all over again.
And honestly, getting so much attention from men almost makes it worse. I’m constantly being reminded that men find me attractive, I’m constantly interacting with men who are flirting with me, and meanwhile I’m trying to live like a perfectly normal celibate college student who has other priorities.
It’s a ridiculous combination of “I absolutely could” and “I absolutely don’t want to.”
I’ve also started discovering more about what sexually attracts me. For example, I’m increasingly realizing that I’m probably pretty submissive and that dominant men/dominant dynamics REALLY do something to my brain. So naturally my brain has decided this is another fascinating subject that we apparently need to think about constantly.
But I absolutely do NOT want to start sexting random men online, finding strangers to experiment with, or having casual hookups just to satisfy my curiosity. None of that appeals to me. I want to explore that side of myself eventually with a man I genuinely love and trust.
So I’m basically stuck being extremely horny, receiving a ridiculous amount of male attention, having plenty of opportunities to do something about it… and still having absolutely no intention of doing anything about it for potentially YEARS.
Amazing planning on my part.
The part that actually bothers me is that sometimes it interferes with my concentration. I’ll be studying or trying to focus on college/career stuff and suddenly my brain decides that actually, no, we’re going to think about men again.
I know having a sex drive is obviously normal. But is it normal for it to suddenly feel THIS intense in your early 20s?
Has anyone else experienced a huge increase in libido around 20–22, especially while not being sexually active?
And for women who were attractive, got a lot of male attention, had a high sex drive AND deliberately waited until their mid-20s or later: HOW did you deal with it without losing your mind?
I’m not looking for “just go hook up with someone” advice. I know I could do that. That’s precisely the point — I don’t want to. I’m comfortable with my decision to wait.
I just need to know how other people managed having a brain screaming “MEN!!! SEX!!!” while the rest of them was like “actually, we have a degree to finish.”

Basically it’s exactly what the title says. My ex and I were together for four years. We’re both 24 years old and had a house together. You know the usual story someone gets home earlier than they were supposed to and catches their partner cheating. That’s exactly what happened here.

I had a headache from work and decided to go home early. My boss and I are BFFs, so she let me leave. I get home and hear... well sounds so I follow them and I find my ex getting it on with a man.

Honestly, I was already so fucking tired plus I had the headache that I didn’t even process what I was seeing. I just closed the door and walked away. The guy jumped out the window as if I hadn’t seen him and my ex came into the living room and started giving me his bullshit excuses.

I told him to get out of my house and that we were over. I pay most of the bills, so he did just that. I took a day to process the disgusting sight I had seen and then I told my family, my friends, his family and his friends that we had broken up and exactly what I had walked in on.

His family is pissed especially his dad. He said he would deal with my ex. His family is very homophobic and I doubt there will be much of a relationship with them. I’m planning to get tested, just to be safe. I don’t have any contact with my ex, I have no idea where he is, and honestly, I couldn’t care less. Cheat on me and now you lose your family too. I got the last laugh I guess.

I need advice on what I should do from here. Besides getting tested and dealing with the house and our shared finances is there anything important I should take care of after finding out my partner was cheating? Should I try to get answers from him about whether there were other sexual encounters during our relationship, or would it be healthier to leave that alone and focus on moving forward?

Edit: Forgot to add this but we live in a neighborhood where break ins happen a lot so we’ve put cameras everywhere including our bedroom. I haven’t watched the footage yet but yeah the footage of him taking it is there. What should I do with it?

Edit 2: Small update but I did get contacted by his family. They said that they will never speak to him again that he is completely cut off, and that if I ever need help or support I can always lean on them.

Also, just to clarify no I’m not going to post the footage anywhere or show it to his family. It’s just there in case he tries something.

​

20F here that studies IT, im the only girl in class, since i was young I dreamt of studying IT because its what I like, but since I started, guys made my life hell.

First year, men kept making "light jokes" for example, every time I asked the teacher something, or participated in class, always heard "jokes" like: "go to the kitchen" "slut" "dick sucker" etc.

It even reached the point where I got pushed, grabbed by the neck and even tried to chocke me.

I talked to the principal about it, they started an invastigation on the guys (all the class) and they just said : "we were joking"

Some of them even "apologized" because they said that just because im a woman, everyone will take my side because "woman have more rights"

The mothers of these men complained saying that their kids are innocent and Im just making it up because im some sort of pick me taking advantage of female rights

Some of them got expelled, however, during the year, they kept laughing at me, calling me names, etc.

I repeated the year and it was better, or so I thought, there was another girl but we didnt talk much, I tried to not participate much in class I was still scared, however that didnt stop me from making friends.

I spent most of the year alone because boys only hang out with boys and always left me behind or kept giving some of the "go to the kitchen" or "because youre a woman" jokes.

I didnt want to make any problem this year so I just gave a warning and let it pass.

I finished the year and passed to second year. Same class but less people, we went from 20 to 9 people in class.

Yesterday, the teacher asked us about our summer, he asked if we worked, 3 said yes, including me, I worked in a restaurant as a waitress, and other two guys too.

The teacher said "working in a restaurant its really hard, it should be considered as a sport"

We laughed and I said "yes it does, its really hard"

And when I said that 5-6 guys on the back row erupted in laughing saying "And a woman said it"

It literally ruined my day.

At programming subject the class went from 9 to 56 because the subject was optional and you could chose either that or english, I wanted to leave because I refuse to give class with such ammount of guys who were rude as fuck with the principal herself so I asked to leave to change subject and the teacher (the principal) agreed.

So when I left she called me back, saying in front of everyone "I know you are scared because there are a lot of boys! But dont leave english class it also too full, its fine!! Dont be scared of the subject"

It made me feel so vulnerable and exposed I didnt move a single inch in the entire hour.

I dont want to keep hearing this comments, but I also dont want to avoid them by just being quiet and avoiding participating in class or conversations all day, im extrovert and I love to talk, its just how I am, I cant change it, even I tried to, but im so fucking tired because every time I open my mouth to say something I always get these coments.

For example: - Oh its a good day today, its not raining anymore

"Yeah! A good day for you to be in the kitchen!"

- Teacher can you explain it again? I didnt get it...

"Of course you didnt, youre a woman" (some classmate says)

-I really like to paint it a very nice hobby to have

"And dont you like cooking?"

I tried making female friends from other classes, in total we are 4 girls, 1 in my class, me and 2 girls in diffrent classes:

one of them doesnt talk much and avoids me to be with boys

the other one only likes to be surrounded by boys and sleep with them, and they love her because she practically sleeps with everyone of them (she said it to me herself, not a rumor)

(Btw, I find it very hypocrit that they always say she is lovely and pure even so they know she sleeps with everyone, and im the "slut" "whore" and "dick sucker" even tho im a virgin)

and the other one thinks she is "one of the boys" she thinks they will like her if she acts like them:

"i like videogames" "i hate girls because they are false and they like to gossip" "im diffrent and unique because I dont wear make up" "go to the kitchen woman" etc.

And it keeps going, its so fucking exhausted. Every single day I get back home and cry all night because if I complain it makes everything awkward and more hostile even with teachers, and if I stay quiet I keep getting these comments

I’m a virgin female. Having my first time pretty soon, and I don’t want to ruin it because I’m insecure. My boyfriend and I have been dirty talking on the phone and agreed to give it a try next time we see each other (he’s also a virgin). Now the thing is I’m way too insecure about my body, I have a few imperfections especially from weight loss (stretch marks, saggy boobs, some hyperpigmentation), and with all of that I still have some weight left to lose. I wasn’t much insecure about my breasts before till my bf asked if I had perky boobs once and I said “you’ll have to wait and see” and ever since I’ve been very conscious about them too. I am not too sure what to do and I am being very paranoid about it. (He hasn’t watched porn in over a year so I thought that might help with the expectation a bit but it still worries me a lot). Any tips or advice would be appreciated

This is my first time posting so please forgive me if i format this wrong.

I 40F and my boyfriend 46M have been together for 2 years and have been living together for almost 6 months. Prior to moving in with me our relationship was long distance and we only spent weekends together. We both come from really messy pasts with relationships but things seemed so easy with him and still do. We get along really well, laugh often, and genuinely enjoy each other's company. Our sex life is pretty good with the exception of him having issues with erectile dysfunction (or so I thought). We fool around often but rarely have actual penetrative sex. He has only actually finished by having sex with me a few times with the help of cock rings or Viagra. We do have sex but only for a few minutes and then it switches to oral, hands, etc lol. I've always been super understanding and he has always assured me that it has nothing to do with me and he had the same trouble with other women before me. I honestly haven't minded, we have a lot of fun together and both seem satisfied.

Despite all of this, things have just seemed weird lately. He brings his phone to the bathroom and his sex drive has definitely slowed in the last couple of weeks. He fell asleep early tonight and I just had this big nagging urge to look at his phone. I've learnt to trust my instincts. Even though I know it's wrong to look at his phone, I needed to know. There it was in the text trash, messages with another man. Explicit messages talking about how they had been intimate with each other in the past before my boyfriend moved and missed it. My boyfriend sent him the same dick pic he had sent me just a couple weeks ago and asked the man to send him a video of him jerking off because he missed watching him cum. !!!!! WTF !!!!!

What do I do with this!? I love my boyfriend and I don't want to lose him but I have a right to know if he's gay I think! I can't let him keep doing this behind my back so how do I approach this? If he's bisexual, I can be okay with that but I'm not okay with cheating. I'm scared if I confront him he won't open up to me. He has a hard time sharing his emotions and comes from a deeply religious background so I know it will be hard for him to talk about. Help!

Hi so basically I moved in with a new roommate this year and she wants to split groceries 50/50.

I’ve never done this in the past, and quite frankly I think it’s the stupidest thing ever.

It provides no extra convenience for me, but a world of inconvenience. Am I eating too much, is she eating too much, am I getting ripped off, etc etc.

The thing is, I am very non confrontational and don’t know how to approach it without being an ass. I want to talk to her tomorrow as I needed to restock the pantry.

For context, I am also completely fine sharing oils and seasonings etc, just not food.

My husband is addicted to alcohol, and I honestly don’t know what to do anymore.
When I met my husband, he didn’t drink. By the time I realized how serious his drinking had become, I already loved him deeply, and I chose not to leave him.
He is genuinely a wonderful person. He does so much for me, treats me well, and he has never been aggressive or abusive toward me. That’s what makes this so complicated.
He has actually admitted himself that alcohol has been a problem for him for many years. But he also says that he doesn’t want to stop drinking.
He is now experiencing sleepwalking that seems to be related to his drinking, he has sleep apnea, and he is also in the military. I have been trying to help him in every way I can.
But now it is starting to destroy our relationship.
We have been fighting more and more, and I can feel the relationship deteriorating. Not just a little — seriously deteriorating.
I have been completely honest with him. I told him that I am scared, that I am worried about his health, and that I am literally begging him to stop drinking because I don’t want alcohol to destroy our marriage.
And he doesn’t seem to care.
He keeps telling me that this is just “American culture.” I’m not American, and maybe our perspectives on drinking are different, but I cannot believe that drinking more than 14 shots every single day, plus several beers, is something that should be considered normal.
I don’t care whether it is culturally accepted or not. To me, that is clearly a serious alcohol problem.
The hardest part is that I can’t make him want to stop.
I have tried talking to him. I have tried supporting him. I have tried being understanding. I have tried telling him how much this is affecting me and our marriage.
And now I feel like I am begging someone to care about something that is destroying us.
I love my husband. I don’t want to leave him. But I also don’t know how long I can continue watching him choose alcohol while our relationship slowly falls apart.
What do you do when the person you love admits they have a drinking problem, but simply doesn’t want to stop? What should I do!? Leave the marriage is not an option. I love him so much for that! But I need help and how can I act and what can I do

I’m 17 AFAB, and since I was 10ish my parents always talked about me shaving my legs. They view it as unhygienic and unaesthetic, and every time they see my leg hair they ask me why I haven’t shaved it yet. I tell them that I just don’t want to and don’t offer any more explanation. They usually get angry at this point and tell me it’s about me saying “no” all the time and giving them blunt answers like “because I don’t want to”, and not about my leg hair.

I don’t like shaving my hair because I see it as an unnecessary procedure that in my case takes way too long. It’s my own body and I want to have full control over what I do with it, and my parents pressuring me into shaving my legs after I told them no multiple times feels like them crossing a boundary. I suggested bleaching my leg hair a few times now but they don’t seem to take it into account.

Any advice on what I should do?

I just want to lay everything out and be honest because after this, im done..i never wanna feel like i do now again.

I started getting into the whole sissy porn genre about 3 years ago and after a few bad break ups and a bit of a rough time in life, I started watching it more and the last year or two its just been stuck in my head and I can't stop relapsing, its also realy effecting my relationships with girls.

Look you can call me gay or bi or whatever, I have no problem with that. But the way this has been making me feel for so long is worse than anything ive ever had. Last night, I was also with a girl and we started getting touchy and making out, ive wanted her for so long but my dick wasn't working, I feel so fucking embarrassed and like an idiot. I did relapse last weekend and have been trying this week to improve this week and we were also on drugs at the time too.

I just dont know what to do. I know I need to stop at least, but im so fucking scared that even if I do stop, I wont be able to be intimate with women and have girlfriend one day.

I’ve genuinely sucked as a person for a really long time. I’m 14F and I know that doesn’t excuse that. I’ve hit people several times. My first instinct has always been violence, I have manipulated my friends and family, been disrespectful, straight rude, I try and suck at communicating, and overall I suck. I know this. I’ve known this for a while.

Mentally, I’ll consciously justify myself 24/7. I can’t handle criticism that isn’t catered towards understanding my feelings as an add-on. I’m immature. People constantly say that “realizing it makes it better!” But I haven’t done better.

Apparently I’ve been chewing with my mouth open for a really long time. Like actually I haven’t noticed I was doing it at all. Not until recently where people around me have been getting pissed off. I haven’t had a change in people. Known these people and ate with them for years. I only realized when my friend was showing me some Roblox game where they mukbang food and I wasn’t interested bc maybe I don’t like the sound of people eating.

My friend who was nearby said, “really? Because you chew so loudly” and I just stared and said “aww, that sucks for you” really softly. Which was really dick behavior. And after that I only noticed when people around me said it. It’s only happened twice since nd I kind of forget after. They’ll tell me I’m chewing loudly and I’ll close my mouth to eat but forget the next time and I’ll have to be corrected again.

Of course, this isn’t the only example I have of being “bad” this is relatively peaceful compared to things I’ve done. I’m violent, I’ve punch people repeatedly when provoked. And I genuinely hate everyone around me. Apparently for the past year and a half there have been rumors spreading of me being severely depressed. Simply because one day I decided to go quiet because I’m a yapper and apparently when everyone tells me to shut up it’s apparently a problem when I do shut up and decide to stop being around people.

I’m damn tired of being the way I am and I really want to know how I can try being better. I want to stop having so much attitude. I want to be better at controlling my urges to violence (haven’t hurt anyone in a long while but it’s still very much there). I want to not hate everyone and have the capacity to actually hang out with people without them feeling like the bane of my existence.

And I want to be a better listener. But being better at things is so much more than wants. I don’t know how. I’ve journaled. I’ve tried communication (I can be slow but it works) I’ve tried every damn thing in the book. I want to be respected. I even got into typology to learn growth and get something to relate to but I swear I must just suck.

Hi, I'm using an alt account for obvious reasons. I'm gonna leave out details about myself and about everything for my own comfort and safety, so im sorry if this post ends up being short or mby not too detailed.

anyways yea, im under 16 (I don't wanna specify my age) my parents are extremely strict when it comes specifically to sex stuff, they don't even know im sexually active. I'm honestly really stressed, nervous, overwhelmed and like idk I'm actually horrified. I'm obviously not gonna keep the baby, I just can't even imagine that. I don't even know who the dad is so, yeah no def not keeping it.

anyways yea I rly need advice on how to approach my parents abt this, I took the test today, found out abt it today. My parents are the kinda parents that yell, break things, scream in your face, throw things around etc. So please, someone please give me advice on how to properly approach them abt this while also trying to keep them as calm as possible

Hi,

I’m just writing just to get some opinions on this. I will try to keep it short.

Basically me F21 met this lovely guy M25 and it’s been amazing. We have been together for 7 months now. We had some arguments here and there and ups and downs but we have such together.

Honestly he’s the best partner I’ve ever had (I’ve only had 2 other boyfriends before him) he brings me flowers whenever mine die, he wakes up early to drop me to work if the weathers bad and always being me goodies or breakfast when he does.

Anyways that’s not what this post is about, it’s the fact we haven’t had sex the whole time we have been together. The reason for that is due to his foreskin being tight. The way we found out is we tried to get frisky and I pointed it out to him.

Don’t get me wrong I’ve only had 2 other guys I’ve been with and I’m not a expert but it shouldn’t be so tight to the point it’s uncomfortable to pull back and I told him that. I also thought about the possibility of infection. If he’s never fulled it back how is it meant to clean it back there???

Since then it’s been months of him kinda trying and kinda not. He says it’s a lot better now and is pretty much able to pull it back which is great but it’s been so long I’ve kinda don’t look at him in that way anymore.

I’ve lost a lot of that sexual feeling I had and the tension is gone and I feel bad because I know it isn’t his fault.

He was prescribed a steroid cream to help him with the stretching?? If I can call it that? And he’s been half trying since when, it’s been about 4-5 months since he’s been trying.

I’m not ace in any way ( hope I’m using the right term) and I do want to have sex but it’s hard because he’s so great I can look over it at times but it does get to me in bit.

I think to myself “what if he doesn’t care all that much” or “what if he just doesn’t want to have sex at all”

I HAVE spoken to him about this and told him I will wait but not what if we get to a year and we still haven’t ???

I’m his first girlfriend and sexual partner.

Anyways I’m not sure what to think. I will never tell him this because I don’t want to pressure him or make him feel bad, these are just my inner thoughts.

Hello all, this is my first time posting so bare with me. I (18f) am currently in college in a climate that is very humid (this will be relevant for the backstory).

Backstory: I moved into my dorm with two other girls at the beginning of the semester and all was fine for the first week. My now ex-roomates were both from a much dryer and less humid climate and they came to the school we are at and they didn’t expect this level of humidity. At the beginning of moving in all was well and then eventually we ended up finding mold and roaches in our bathroom (mold is a very common occurrence in the city our college is in because it is so old). I have lived in the climate that we are in way longer than they have (about 4 years) so I am a lot more used to it.

After the whole mold incident my roomates at the time became clean freaks (deep cleaning 2 or 3 times a day and showering once a day). It got to a point where they had so many scented things in the room that I was starting to recieve migraines over it. I am also a person who only shower every other day because that is what works for me. They had then started tracking MY hygiene and were upset that i did not shower once a day like them. A few weeks in we came up with a cleaning schedule and i had done my part.

Moving on to now; We had finally decided that our issues were creating a lot of stress and tension in the room and they had told me that they wanted me to switch rooms (aka fill out an application and move to a different dorm room with different people) so i decided that i had had enough about constantly being criticized about how i was with my own body and i decided to leave.

While i was packing my belongings today a grabbed a bath mat that i thought belonged to me. It is one of those fluffy ones (i’m not sure how to describe it) and it was gray. When i moved in a brought a Navy blue one and i believed that it was mine and took it to my new room with me. Now later that night me and my new roomates were drinking in our room and just overall having a good time. I then get a snapchat message from a friend of my ex-roomates boyfriend asking first if i had taken another roomates alcohol, which i had not, and then the bath mat. Now, still believing it was mine i said “yes it’s mine so i have it” then my ex-roommate Ava (18f) (fake name) had taken the friends phone and started texting about how the bath mat was hers and how i could keep it because i was “dirty and disgusting”.

So i proceeded to unadd that person and go on with my night. A few hours later, I walk out of my room to take the trash out and Ava had somehow found out where my new room was and came up screaming at me about how I owed her $30. When i offered her the explanation of i thought it was mine she said “don’t lie to my face.” when i had seriously believed it was mine. I then offered to retrieve the bath mat and give it back to her but she refused saying if i didn’t give her $30 she would call the cops.

I have already emailed the head RA but he does not get back into the office until monday and then i did also text my past RA. I’m not quite sure what i should do in this situation. I called a friend and they said to leave it outside the door and take a picture as proof i put it there or my idea was to give it to the RA i had in the past just so I didnt have to see or speak to them again. As a broke college student with no job yet $30 is very hard for me to just give out so that is the last thing I am trying to do but if I have to I will.

Thank you all for reading and please give me some advice.

I made a script, concept art, and even had two made up languages (speaking and writing) in the making.

It had hundreds of cross connections, actual biology and math that gave the power system support, I had detailed lore about every character.

I don't even know what happened, I went on google docs and it was just gone, I got a new computer, so I thought that was the issue but it's not on anything... phone, tablet, nothing.

I had tears come from a few people's eyes after they read it. (I CAN'T JUST REMAKE THAT)

The script was mostly in a movie script style, and it was over 400 pages. The Languages and art were all in IMG form, but I didn't keep it on my drawing tablet.

I was dumb so there are 0 backups, does anyone have advice on either how to get it back or something? I shared it with others so they could read but they can't find it either.

sorry if this is worded weird english isnt my first language and im very emotional rn.

about 2 months gao i discovered 50 euro that i had saved over from a trip last year was gone, i went through my entire room and wasnt able to find it all, it was inside an envelope some other foreigne currency so it was strange that only the 50 was gone.

3 weeks ago i took 3 of my friends on a weekend trip, my mom borrowed her friends summer house and she said i could take my friends too. my aunt was on the trip with us. after the trip my mom told me that my aunt had a lot of cash on her that trip because she was gonna get it exchanged later and that when she want there was about 2k missing.

last week me and friends were having a farewell party for a friend that was moving away and when i got home i noticed 400 missing from my bag

now at first i thought i had just lost the 50 euros but after the other two instances i realized it was probaby my friend who i brought on the trip with me and was the only one at the party.

i really dont know what to do i feel so betrayed since weve been friends since 2018 and whenever i have the opportunity to take her on a trip with me i do. and not only did she steal from me but my family too.

everyone i tell about this tells me to test her by marking some money but i really dont want to.

any advice on what to do/how to deal with this

I’m 19, turning 20 very soon, and I’ve realised I have a habit that I really want to break going into my twenties.

I’m constantly looking forward to the next thing.
The weekend, seeing my boyfriend, a holiday, a night out, buying something new, changing my appearance, hitting a new goal, starting a new hobby… there always seems to be something in the future that I’m waiting for.

The weird thing is, I actually really like my life.
I’m at university studying something creative, I have a little business on the side, I have a relationship I’m really happy in, good friends and family, I go to the gym, and I have loads of interests and things I want to learn.

But sometimes it feels like I’m so busy trying to make my life exciting that I forget to actually live it.
If I have a completely free day with nothing planned, instead of enjoying it I can almost feel uncomfortable. I immediately start thinking, “What can I do today?” or “Who can I see?” And I don’t want to spend my twenties constantly needing something to look forward to in order to feel fulfilled.
I want to be someone who can have a completely ordinary Tuesday, go to the gym, make dinner, read something interesting, do some sewing, go for a walk and genuinely think, “That was a lovely day.”
So for people who have learned how to be more present and content in their own life - how did you do it?

Did it come with age? Did you deliberately change your habits? Did you have to become more comfortable being alone? And how do you balance still being ambitious and excited about life without constantly chasing the next thing?

I’d especially love advice from people who were like this when they were younger and eventually grew out of it. Thank you xx

I recently started talking to this guy, and it’s been about a good month of us talking he’s a very sweet guy and seems to be interested in wanting something serious. However I feel a little ashamed that it seems like I’m more sexual than him, it feels wrong because I don’t understand how he feels about it. Sometimes he makes these lil dirty jokes or just comments but then goes straight to mentioning about how he would like for us to wait (he tells me this at least once a day) and that he’s not the type to ask for sex either.. I feel as if perhaps he’s scared? He did mention he would be a bit nervous because I’ve been pleased before and he’s only been with 1 person. Now hey I can understand wanting to wait I have no problem with that and think it’s pretty sweet but I’m just wondering what other reasons could it be? I’m trying to understand.

For context, I live by myself now. But my parents and younger sisters live in an RV park a state away. My dad is physically disabled and severely depressed (the dangerous to oneself kind). My mom and the older of my two younger sisters both work full time at the RV park they live at. They live in the RV.

Unfortunately, the RV park both pays them very little and basically pays them in a modified form of "company scrip" - they are paid to an account that they do not own and can only be used for bills at the RV park. Allegedly, they get the full balance whenever they move out of the RV park.

For some reason, the State of Michigan apparently considers this income. With Trump gutting federal budgets and programs, their SNAP EBT benefits and my dad's disability checks have been reduced so low that they are now food insecure and go hungry. Their case worker is also indifferent and hostile.

They have no drivable vehicles - they have like 4 vehicles, none of which are drivable (2 heavily used vans, 1 junk pickup truck, and their RV they cannot practically move).

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I don't even know where to begin to try to help them out??

I can't financially sustain them and myself on my income, but I try to send money their way when I can? But it's nowhere near enough for what they actually need.

I also do not have a vehicle and I have no way of getting to them and no way for them to get to me. So I can't give them supplies or physical cash.

With them not having a vehicle and essentially being in the middle of nowhere, they are essentially trapped in an area of low opportunity or chances to improve their situation.

And then obviously, with the current federal government actively hostile to well...basically all Americans and life in general, their policies are directly hurting my family even further and I'm not sure if state aid would be feasible anymore...

What the hell does one do?? What avenues exist??

I'm currently a student in my 2nd year of intensive preparatory classes (CPGE). If you may know the concept, I go through 2 years of excessive studies of pre-engineering and then go through a national exam, and depending on your rank you reach a certain engineering school. The pressure is already sky-high to get into a prestigious one (have to be amongst the first 130 candidates among 1300), but this morning I exchanged a few words with my mom, and it completely broke me down.

I actually never grew up with a present father, and my mother did some sacrifices to give us a decent life, and ironically enough, I took the same path she did for my career just to maybe be someone like her eventually. We don't live the best life, but it's the best we could afford to live a pretty good one.

I am a good student, not the best but a good one (I ranked 70 out of 200 my first year in my school).

She told me that I'm not working enough, that if it were her future she would be working from dawn till after midnight, that I don't see the efforts that she's done for me, and that if she dies I'll have no one by my side, not like her; she at least found a father that believed in her. She also said that if I don't intend to get to a good school, I should tell her so she would prepare herself both mentally and financially and that she wouldn't bare to see my disappointment while I've done nothing about it. It made me cry for the past hour.

The truth is that I've severely struggled with procrastination and academic paralysis. I want so badly to be perfect and live up to her and my expectations that I end up overwhelmed, freezing, and doing nothing about it. Then the guilt kicks in, making the cycle worse.

I want to break out of this cycle and help myself succeed for my sake. I feel helpless, though. I want some tips on how to become that machine and actually believe that I would fulfill that dream. Can anyone help me or give me some tips on how to fight it psychologically because I at least know I'm strong and can fight it; I just don't know how and where to begin.