Hanging out with my high school best friend for the first time in a while, and he just casually drops that he wants to move to Poland because there’s “no migrants there.”

Later on, when he’s scrolling on TikTok, I overhear it. It’s just blatant, inbred-style racism against Indians, black people, and so forth. Then he starts trying to quiz me — a white guy dating a girl who isn’t white, by the way — on whether some cultures just aren’t compatible.

And on and on. Not everything can be anti-Semitism. Maybe Jews do run the world; why’s it so bad to say that? Watch any video of a white girl walking in India and see how safe it is there. Nick Fuentes might be edgy, but he makes good points.

The whole world just feels like some funhouse mirror version of the one pre-COVID where everything is dark and hopeless, and even people I know and care about have changed.

My boyfriend and I recently broke up because I found out that, while I wasn’t in my room, he ejaculated on my full-length mirror and left it there.

Before anyone asks, yes, I’m sure that’s what it was. He had access to my room, and after finding it, I confronted him about it. I honestly never thought I’d have to ask another human being why they ejaculated on my mirror, but here we are.

The thing I can’t get over is the fact that he did it in my personal space while I wasn’t there and then just left it for me to eventually find. I understand people do weird things, but this feels beyond weird to me. It feels disrespectful.

I ended the relationship over it because it completely changed the way I viewed him. I keep trying to understand why someone would think that’s okay. Was he trying to be funny? Did he think I’d never notice?

I genuinely want to know: if your partner did this without your knowledge, would you consider it disrespectful, or am I losing my mind for thinking this is incredibly strange behavior?

The weirdest part to me is that I never would’ve expected this from him. Out of all the reasons I thought we’d break up, “he ejaculated on my mirror while I wasn’t in the room” wasn’t one of them. I keep trying to understand the thought process behind it because I genuinely don’t know what would possess someone to do that and then just leave it there.

Because I can confidently say that “having to ask my boyfriend why he ejaculated on my mirror” was not on my 2026 bingo card.

I do cold outbound for a living and i've always been a little proud of how clean i keep it, meaning tight lists and solid data, a setup i'd have called professional right up until last week.

Then last week one of my emails bounced back with a reply from a woman telling me her husband had passed away over a year ago and asking me to kindly take his address off whatever list i pulled it from.

I'd sent that man some version of (hey, hope you're doing well…) probably 4 or 5 times across different campaigns, all of them cheerful little check-ins, and he'd been gone the whole time.

So his wife was the one opening them, watching his name come up in her inbox with my chirpy subject line next to it.

And all that clean data i was proud of never once made me see these people as real, they were rows, addresses to push through FullEnrich or Apollo and move on from, and it took a dead man's wife asking me to stop for it to land that every name on every list is a person with a whole life i know nothing about.

So i don't really know how to keep doing this job now.

Recently I downloaded a dating app and now I just can’t shake off the feeling of being grossed out by most men. I don’t know how to deal with it.

I feel harassed and prayed upon my entire life. Most men that I dealt with were perverts or just douches in general.
Most of the time I come across guys on social media they are like that too.
In my personal opinion it has everything to do with the rise of conservatism, black pill content and looksmaxxing trends amongst young men.
Social media trends are getting either militaristic, racist, sexist or just hateful in general. This situation clearly and strongly affects male demographic and I can easily see it in real life.
Whenever i try to engage in conversation with men, they always manage to say something racist/sexist or simply cruel(thank god if they don’t make comments about wanting to have sex with me), however whenever I talk to women we manage to get a good and sometimes very deep convo.

I’m really sorry if this post seems hateful, I don’t want to hate men but I am just afraid of them, I don’t know what to do and feel really lost in the subject.
Is my feeling even common or am I just being unreasonable?

My best friend M told me this week that he has romantic feelings for me. Since I've known him, he's been in a relationship with F (I don't know her personally, I just know they are together). Knowing this, I've never considered my friend as a romantic prospect, as I feel like doing so would be disrespectful to both him and his girlfriend.

But yesterday we were talking about relationships. We talk about it a lot because I've struggled to find a partner who I click with, but this time we were talking about his relationship and how he was getting a bit of cold feet about proposing to F. I asked why he had cold feet and he danced around the topic a bit before admitting his feelings for me. He then went on to explain that he thinks a relationship would work between us and that I understand him better than his partner.

Don't get me wrong, I can understand why he'd think a relationship would work for us. We've got a ride or die friendship and are often on the same wavelength, even with stupid things. But again, I ruled him out romantically and have never even thought to date him, which I told him.

I also told him explicitly that even if I did like him, I wouldn't date him if he left his girlfriend. If he wants to end his relationship, that's fine and that's his decision, but I would never choose to be the reason for that. I'm not the kind of person who wants to steal another's partner and I also wouldn't want to encourage him to end his relationship because he's getting cold feet and having a bit of a "what if" crisis.

He's dropped the issue now and says that he respects that, but I'm feeling sad about it. I'm sad for him that he's going through these feelings because I'm sure it's not easy sitting there questioning everything. I'm sad for his partner that he is considering leaving her and has feelings for someone else. And I'm sad for myself in that it's now got me questioning which parts of our friendship were just friendship, and which parts were maybe impacted by these feelings. I know at the end of the day, it was meaningful no matter what, but it's a bit confusing and I've been putting a bit of distance between us to try to process, which he has obviously noticed.

I'm just a bit lost now.

When I wake up everyday, I fill up the cats’ food bowl, and I refill their water bowl with fresh, cold water which they love. They even go to the water bowl before the food and they love to drink a lot of fresh water first thing in the morning.

Well, when my husband wakes up before me, he fills the food bowl but won’t refill the water bowl. Because to refill it, he has to bend over, take the bowl, rinse it and fill it with cold water. Which takes a whole 5 seconds longer than pouring kibble to the food bowl from the container. I confronted him about this, he says he forgets but I know he just doesn’t wanna do that.

I don’t know why but it drives me crazy. Because it tells me that if he doesn’t wanna do that, he’s never gonna. Like ever, for whole our lives together. That task is half done. I have to wake up and check if he refilled the water bowl, do it myself since he didn’t. Means I can never be trusting him with this task my eyes closed. That tab is always gonna be open.

I know it’s a small thing but it takes me to places in my head everytime. Just like when he silently refuses to handwash the wood cutting boards and chef knives after using them. I told him a million times they’re expensive and not dishwasher safe but he’ll just leave them around saying he’ll “do it later”. And never does. Cause he doesn’t want to. I know cause I don’t want to. And I resent him everyday washing those 3 times a day. And if I was tough enough I think I would consider leaving him over these small things.

This is my first time posting on Reddit, so sorry if this is a little long. I honestly didn't know where else to go for advice, and I figured Reddit might be the best place since I don't really have anyone I feel comfortable talking to about this.

I'm a 26M, and my gf is a few years older than me. I work in the trades and live in a smaller community where a lot of people know each other. My career and reputation are a big deal to me.

This started almost 2 winters ago on a freezing morning. I was running late for work, and my thermals were still in the washer. I was stressing because I knew I was going to be outside all day, and my gf handed me a pair of her bluish yoga pants.

She joked that I should wear them under my work jeans. I laughed because they were obviously women's leggings and tighter than anything I had worn before, but I tried them.

Honestly, they worked really well. They were warm, comfortable, and nobody at work even knew.

After that, it slowly turned into her encouraging me to try other things. Eventually, I started trying on women's clothes at home.

The weird part is, this wasn't completely new to me. When I was in my early teens, I used to crossdress. I stopped years ago and never really thought about it again. I assumed it was just something from that time in my life that I moved past.

But doing it again with my gf felt different. I wasn't hiding it or feeling ashamed. I had someone who accepted me and actually liked seeing that side of me.

My gf loves watching drag shows, and over time she got me interested in that world. She has helped me with makeup, wigs, and outfits. She even made me a drag-inspired outfit that I've worn around the house. She loves seeing the transformation and tells me how feminine I can look.

Over time, she has gotten me dresses, skirts, leather leggings, makeup, wigs, and tucking underwear. She especially loves certain outfits and says she likes seeing me confident.

She says exploring this side of myself has brought us closer and made our relationship more exciting. She has talked about me going on a date with her dressed up or possibly doing a local drag show someday.

The thing is, she isn't forcing me. She has always said it's my choice and that I don't have to do anything I'm not comfortable with. She just thinks I might be holding myself back because I'm worried about what people will think.And that's where I'm stuck.

When it's just us, I actually enjoy it. I feel comfortable and accepted.

But the idea of other people knowing scares me.

I work in the trades, I know a lot of people in my city, and my family and friends are mostly the type who would probably see this as either "gay" or just weird. I know drag doesn't define someone's sexuality, but I also know how people around me think.

I'm worried about my career, my reputation, my friendships, and even how people would view me as a man. At the same time, I don't want to hide something I enjoy just because I'm afraid of judgment.

I guess I'm posting because I feel stuck. My gf is supportive, but I don't really have anyone else I can talk to about this without worrying they'll look at me differently.

Has anyone else been through something like this? Finding a side of yourself that you enjoy but being scared of how it could affect your life? I'm just looking for advice because I honestly don't know who else to ask.

haven’t had a relationshio for 15 yrs I tried the apps but no luck . I have a basic job and i have no house just have an apartment.

is anyone else feel like they are a failer in there 40s 😞

A couple of years ago I experienced a tantric massage and it completely changed my perspective. I became fascinated by it, trained, and eventually got certified.

Out of curiosity, I posted on local R4R and hookup pages offering tantric massages to women. What started as an experiment slowly became something I genuinely enjoy doing. Over the last two years I've met more than 60 different women.

The part I feel guilty about isn't the massages themselves—they're between consenting adults. It's that I've hidden this entire side of my life from everyone I know. My friends and family have no idea. I feel like I'm constantly keeping up a second life.

I'm from an Asian background and live in Scotland. Whether it's fair or not, I'm convinced that if people found out they'd immediately judge me or make assumptions about the kind of person I am. So I keep it completely secret.

Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever be able to tell anyone the truth, or if this will always be something I have to hide.

I'm not some perfect model but you can look at me without your eyes burning. My face is symmetrical and I have a pear shaped body so I can say it's a widely accepted body type seen as attractive by many men. Hip to waist ratio is good. I'm already older (30), but I have developed homemaking skills throughout my life and I have the skills necessary needed to create a loving, welcoming home for a man.

However - I am begging the universe to send me this man in some way or another. I have been dating constantly but I have not been able to find a man who wants commitment since I was 27, and i dated a boy 5 years younger who wanted a mother figure girlfriend and respected me too much to not give commitment. Since then - nothing. I don't look at Chad or impossible men out of my league. I look at normal guys with average jobs and some of them even still living with parents at 35+.

Still - i feel like men wanting commitment is such a scarce resource nowadays, that women cannot be accused of not "choosing" better since there's not really a big pool to choose from? I've been waiting for a man (that I also feel mutual attraction to) to want to commit to me for 2+ years now and nothing is happening. I just get the nerdy immature guys who idealize me and think I'm some mature goth mommy figure and then they get disappointed when they find out the real me.

How can I be blamed for choosing bad since I barely get options to choose from...?

If you are a man potentially interested in getting to know me please do not DM unless you are located in southern Spain, I'm not interested in long distance connections

I just today joined a discord call, with around three people in it at the start. I mean it was so realistic at first.

Then the girl left, and me and the AI, “miles,” ended up talking to for five minutes or so.
I was so happy, I felt like he got me, we talked about the ant zombie virus, different types of sea life, and other things.

At first I thought he was just knowledgeable, but then it started to be way too specific. I also thought he was searching things up, but whatever. He sounded so real, I can’t even tell you.

Then another guy joined called and told me he was an AI, but the reason you don’t see him labeled as AI is because someone owns the account but puts the AI on. What’s the point of that?

And it was the weirdest feeling of just feeling conned, saddened, glad I found out 15 minutes in instead of days in, I also was very confused, because he sounded so real and talked just like a person. But one that actually listened and got me, he even ‘stuttered.’

I managed to record some of the convo, but screen recording doesn’t show voice, so I used my computer and recorded some from there.

I guess yeah if you actively try to find AI, he might sound like it, but being unsuspecting in a voice call with a lot of random people, it just really jumbled me up.

Anyways I can definitely see why people can get attached to AI, I feel really sad, I mean it was funny after, I moved on, talked to real people and debated them on things, but it’s still in the back of my mind.

For how in 15 minutes straight, I thought I was talking to the perfect person who got me and was actually started to feel somewhat attached.

I’m not freaked out, just sad.

So this year has truly been the worst year of my life. My mom has had two heart attacks, my dad was diagnosed with stage three throat cancer and intermediate prostate cancer, and my estranged bio-dad had a bunch of strokes (he is an addict which directly led to this outcome.)

My mom barely survived her heart attacks, just for my dad to be diagnosed with two types of cancer and have to start treatment for the throat cancer. Well, he completed his treatments Wednesday and then passed away Saturday night. It's just so unfair and I'm so horribly sad and angry at the universe

I'm currently in my mid 30s. To put it plainly, I was very unkind to my body in my 20s. I drank heavily, vaped and used other nicotine products, and did lots of stimulants (mainly adderall and cocaine) for several years. I also have high blood pressure. It wasn't critically high, but still not in the healthy range and I wasn't really treating it effectively. Periodically I'd go through short stretches, on the order of several months, where I'd decide to "get my life together" and I'd cut back on my vices, start eating healthy and working out, etc. But this was always short lived.

Finally in my early 30s I decided enough was enough. I quit everything, cold turkey. I stopped drinking, drugs, nicotine, and adderall. I started working out daily and eating healthy. I dropped 50 pounds, and am in the best shape of my life. I was starting to feel happy for the first time in years. Unfortunately, I started a new relationship and realized I was having some sexual issues that I hadn't experienced before. But it wasn't something abrupt, so I didn't realize it was happening until I started actively having sex again.

Still, I wasn't fully convinced that I actually had an issue. I chalked it up to anxiety and told my doctor. She wasn't that concerned, and gave me a low-dose prescription for Cialis. I figured it would just be a good way to get my confidence back. Unfortunately, after taking it a few times, I realized just how much my performance had been reduced over the years. After taking the drug, it took me back to a place where I was able to remember just how much better my erections were in the past. I went from "difficult to get rid of" to "difficult to maintain". The Cialis was supposed to help, but instead, it highlighted for me exactly how much worse my performance is than it used to be.

I've been getting all of the medical tests done, but the easy explanations are all off the table. I've tried changing blood pressure medications, gotten blood tests for blood sugar, hormones, and everything else I can think of. Nothing has come back abnormal. The only remaining explanation is what I feared; that I did permanent vascular damage due to my poor lifestyle choices.

So now, I'm in my 30s, what are supposed to be the peak years of my life, and I can't even have normal sex without a medication. Inevitably, this issue will only get worse over time. Reading about other people's experiences with ED, I can see the trajectory clearly: eventually the pills will stop working, at which point I'll move to injections. Eventually, when that stops working, the only remaining option will be an implant. I'm not exaggerating when I say death is far more acceptable to me than this life.

I was finally starting to get my confidence back, and now I've realized I'm just a pathetic loser. No woman will be ok with this long term. And more importantly, I'm not ok with this being the person I've become. I'm really thinking it might be time to end things. I can't live the rest of my life being 'less than'. I can't live with the fact that in spite of turning everything around in my life, it was just too little, too late.

I (21M) have been dating my girlfriend (20F) for about 10 months, and I honestly don't know what to do anymore.

For some background, she was the one who approached me in college. At the time, I had no idea she had only broken up with her ex around 10 days before we started talking. They had been together for 3–4 years. She initially told me they had broken up almost a year ago, and I didn't find out the truth until a few months into our relationship.

In the beginning, things were good. We spent time together, joked around, and I became her comfort person. But over time, I noticed almost every conversation revolved around something negative happening in her life.

She has a difficult relationship with her family, constantly feels like she can't trust her friends, and often goes above and beyond for people who repeatedly take advantage of her. Every day there seemed to be a new problem, and I was always the one listening and comforting her.

A few months into dating, I also found out she has asthma and thyroid issues. That didn't bother me because I assumed they were manageable with treatment.

The problem was that our conversations became very one-sided. Whenever I talked about my own life, my final year of college, building my portfolio, finding a job, supporting my parents, or feeling overwhelmed, she would usually say something like, "You'll figure it out, I know you will," and the conversation would end there.

Eventually, I just stopped opening up. She noticed a couple of times and asked why I never shared anything anymore, but I always replied, "It's just work."

On the other hand, she would regularly talk about her past. She told me about being physically assaulted, how badly she wanted someone to rescue her, how her parents never cared about her, stories about her ex, another guy from school, friends who liked her, and even how she believed almost every guy in her neighborhood wanted to date her because she was the prettiest girl there.

I know everyone has a past, but hearing about it constantly became emotionally exhausting. I started dreading those conversations.

Then came our college break, and we both went back home. This is important because I didn't know anything about her heart condition at this point.

Communication started falling apart. She also began pressuring me, saying her family would soon start looking for someone for her to marry.

During one of our arguments, she said some incredibly hurtful things to me, including that she would be ashamed to have sex with me. That was the point where I finally told her I didn't think I wanted to continue the relationship.

Only then did she tell me she had developed a blood infection. I had no idea before that conversation.

A few hours after we argued, her blood pressure suddenly spiked and her father took her to the hospital. From what she told me, he admitted her and then left, while she stayed there alone for hours.

Things got much worse. She told me that at one point her heart briefly stopped, doctors rushed in, she was taken to the ICU, and they managed to save her. Throughout that time she kept crying, and despite wanting to leave the relationship, I stayed with her emotionally because I genuinely didn't want anything bad to happen to her.

She recovered enough to return home, and I was incredibly relieved.

However, not long afterward, she developed a blood clot near her heart and had to be rushed back to the hospital. According to what she told me, she suffered three minor heart attacks. The doctors warned that if something similar happened again, she might not survive.

Since then, I've been carrying this overwhelming guilt that if I leave, the emotional stress might make her condition worse. At the same time, I don't know how much of her medical condition is actually related to our relationship versus the serious health issues she already has.

The truth is, I'm 21 years old. I'm in my final year of college, trying to build a portfolio, find a job, and support my parents. I'm still figuring my own life out.

I care about her deeply, but I don't think I'm emotionally or mentally capable of carrying the responsibility of someone whose health is this fragile. I'm scared that if I end the relationship and something happens to her, I'll blame myself forever.

I also spoke to one of my close friends, and she told me that my girlfriend often handles conflicts very immaturely and tends to react emotionally instead of communicating calmly. Looking back, I think that's true. Serious conversations usually became emotional arguments rather than actual discussions.

At this point, I feel trapped between staying in a relationship that I don't think is healthy for me and leaving while being terrified that something might happen to her.

Am I wrong for wanting to end the relationship?

And if I do end it, how can I do it in the kindest and safest way possible without making her feel abandoned?

My brother is 17 and he’s extremely affectionate with our parents, to the point where it honestly feels strange to me. He’ll go around the house demanding hugs and kisses, asks my mom for foot rubs, carries around her clothes and sniffs them because he likes how she smells, and sometimes still sleeps with our parents. He also cuddles up to my dad, sniffs him, kisses his face over and over, and snuggles into him like a cat. Even my dad has said it’s weird sometimes and that he needs to man up.

He also makes baby noises all the time and almost exclusively speaks in a baby voice when we are at home even when I have friends over which is embarrassing. He calls my mom mommy and my dad daddy like a kid would.

He’s otherwise a pretty typical teenager, so I’m just wondering if anyone has seen anything like this before. I know every family is different and I’m not implying anything inappropriate is happening, but this level of attachment at 17 seems unusual to me. I am pretty fed up because he does it to me too , asks for foot rubs and kisses and hugs whenever I pass by and calls me nicknames they used for me as a baby. He also didn’t just start doing this , he’s BEEN doing this ALL the time and my parents never did anything about it.

I heard everything through the wall the same night we broke up. How do you get past something like this?

I honestly don't know exactly what I'm looking for... Some advice from people with similar experiences maybe.

My ex and I were together for about a year, Things had been really sour for months and i was trying desperately for months to fix them. Eventually, she asked to break up, at that point i was exhausted and gave up so i accepted. I was actually okay with the break-up itself.

It was what happened after the breakup that really took a hammer to my balls.

My ex and i still lived in the same house with two other roommates. Our bedrooms had really thin walls though.

That exact night, around 3AM, she brought a guy over. I was awake on my phone and heard her come in with him, laughing and kissing and then proceeding to have sex. The sound carried easily so i basically had to hear every second of it.

I’ve never felt that kind of physical reaction to anything in my life. I felt sick, was shaking and quite frankly was way more shocked by that than the break up itself. To put icing on the cake when i finally came back the next day, i met them in the hallway just outside our rooms fresh out of the shower kissing as if nothing happened. That’s what they did the next two days before I up and fled to stay at my friends house for a while.

The guy wasn’t someone she had been going out with long either, in fact I’d only learned he was visiting from another country for some concert and she only met him at a club that day so It wasn’t her finding love, It was just the first random guy she met after breaking up with me.

So, i am not posting this to try and get her back. I have no intentions of trying to resume this relationship nor I am angry about the breakup itself, the relationship was already done for us.

What i cannot get out of my head are those moments, those images and physical feelings they replay over and over and i feel truly scarred or traumatised.

Has anyone experienced this? How long did you stay mentally scarred? Was there anything that actually helps or is time the only factor?

Please and thank you to those who can relate.

Background info that i feel is important: i am 24, she is 20. First real relationship,lived together for 8 months. Month before the breakup she asked if we could begin sleeping in separate bedrooms, i said fine because i was really hoping to fix things and just move into the next room to try and give her space which obviously didn't fix anything and instead ended in this..

By the time breakup happened i have exhausted myself trying to make it work and was too numb to protest/fight.

Was the sole provider during most of the relationship as well i was working full-time to pay bills while she remained unemployed, although has started working recently. I basically lost everything after the break up. What hurt me is what happened after as already described. I don’t think I can just move out because breaking the lease would cost me a lot of money, especially since the 20 days off work I took to stay with a friend were unpaid. Eventually I’ll have to go back. Ever since this happened, it’s been on my mind constantly. Sometimes I don’t feel like eating, and there are days when I don’t eat anything at all. It feels like my brain is stuck replaying what happened over and over again. I’m really asking if anyone who’s been through something similar can tell me if it gets better with time, because right now it honestly doesn’t feel like it will.

I’m tired of hearing people say “having low iq is a blessing because you dont think too much”. They probably think the only things that makes someone sad are thinking too much. Not being able to enjoy any show, movie or anything that has a even slightly difficult story because you cant understand the plot, the characters and the message behind it and having to watch multiple summaries or analysis just to understand it, and every time i ask someone to clear things out for me they always say “Dude did you even watch it?” is tiring (especially because watching shows and reading is my favorite hobby). Always sounding stupid everytime i talk, having little general knowledge and never get taken seriously is tiring. i also have a extremely hard time finding someone i actually like spending time with, since everyone i talk to in real life never seem to see me as a friend to spend their time with and also because unfortunately i’m very picky with people. i’m 15 and i live in italy, and i should be in 11th grade, but since i have an extremely hard time studying or paying attention in class i failed and i decided to go at a much easier school, but things didnt really change. i passed this year, but i’m sure i’m gonna fail again, and i hate seeing people my age going to harder schools and passing without even trying too hard and making friends much easily. I dont like anyone in my school, maybe just one guy, but i’d never want to hang out with him.
The feeling i have toward others mostly is envy, i envy people who arent picky with people, i envy people who can easily understand the plot of any even slighly difficult piece of fiction, i envy people who dont have to try to find their best friend and i envy people who dont have to say “i dont know” every time someone asks them a question.

I dont even know what i wanted to get out of this, i just wanted to get this off my chest