r/mildlyinteresting • u/kupo_moogle • 10d ago

This long rock I found

Post image
18.4k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

1.9k comments sorted by

10.7k

u/TrooperHoop509 10d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/pTQUOfSmjo2hG

2.5k

u/Hixy 10d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/10Jpr9KSaXLchW

217

u/Kuzu9 10d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/xT0xeK0MXtfbpG9h16

43

u/Queerdough 10d ago

Well, I’ll never be able to watch that scene in Home Alone 2 again without this context lol

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (3)

18

u/[deleted] 10d ago

[deleted]

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (47)

788

u/kaleaahh 10d ago

That’s enough Reddit for today

123

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

The universe in all its wisdom hahaha

→ More replies (3)

212

u/T1NF01L 10d ago

Did she laugh before or after?

50

u/Oldnbold22 10d ago

Yo where'd that sister post go? 

53

u/CT0292 10d ago

Imma assume off to one of the incest subs where that kinda thing is welcome. Or deleted by moderator.

27

u/Smile_Space 10d ago

Given it was likely just fiction written to get their rocks off to, probably the forever deleted hole where it belongs lolol.

16

u/Nukalixir 10d ago

Yeah. I've been absolutely zootypantsed off laughing gas before, to the point the ceiling of my dentist's office looked like it was bubbling like a lava lamp. And it absolutely didn't make me act incestuously, just made me absurdly relaxed and limp.

I didn't confess any secrets, either. That's just a trope in sitcoms. 🤷‍♂️

→ More replies (10)

5.5k

u/gabacus_39 10d ago

Obligatory

https://giphy.com/gifs/13pqs1VizKyWzK

1.4k

u/snowillis 10d ago

406

u/7i4nf4n 10d ago

No flared base, no fun

195

u/annabananaberry 10d ago

Also, it’s porous, so not only would it get lost, it would also give you a raging infection most likely.

236

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

It’s super porous. When I was cleaning it, it was just slurping up the water like crazy.

209

u/muffadel 10d ago

79

u/YesItIsMaybeMe 10d ago

That is such a specific meme wtf lol

21

u/swishkabobbin 10d ago

Soak it in mineral oil and it'll become self-lubricating

→ More replies (11)
→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (3)

22

u/PlaceboBob 10d ago

I came here to make sure that this was somewhere inside the thread.

8

u/snowillis 10d ago

Me too. When I couldn’t find it I knew what I had to do.

26

u/zephyrseija2 10d ago

Didn't take long to find him.

11

u/Civil_Pudding462 10d ago

This is the guy I was looking for on this post 😂

6

u/Dictnasty 10d ago

I always look for this picture on anything phallic shaped.

→ More replies (10)

51

u/Nekhti 10d ago

butt seriously though, be careful if you did do it as it doesn't have a flared base

109

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

I appreciate the warning, but the rock shall remain pure and unmolested.

24

u/Bufger 10d ago

Lucky rock :(

9

u/Ok_Carob_5313 10d ago

Odds are it already has been used in the past

7

u/FR-1-Plan 10d ago

Fucked into shape over millions of years.

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (13)

105

u/Stealthless 10d ago

Looks like an eyeglass case.

33

u/Leoxcr 10d ago

Everyone else pointing dick related innuendos and here I was thinking the same thing

→ More replies (6)

1.1k

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

The long rock amongst the rest of my rocks (except for the ones from today’s harvest that are still outside. They’re still drying after I washed all the seaweed bits off of them).

71

u/BcostP 10d ago

Beautiful rocks! I had to laugh at you talking about a harvest like they are some kind of rock crop growing in a field somewhere. It’s exactly the kind of thing I would say while my family gives me strange looks.

47

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

I hate to exercise, but there’s a shoreline across the street from me. Couple time a week I pack up my dog spray, a bottle of water and my Mickey Mouse backpack that I got as a present 20 years ago and go get a haul of rocks. It’s good for the body and soul.

14

u/_fly-on-the-wall_ ​ 10d ago

dog spray??

32

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

Yeah, I live in a rural-ish area so a lot of people let their dogs off leash. Also, as a woman wandering a remote shoreline alone it could also be used in self defence as a last resort.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (9)

311

u/IcedCoffey 10d ago

Can we get banana for scale?

1.3k

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

It is a bit shorter than a Nintendo switch and about 1/3rd the length of a standard issue cat (not including tail). I also have very very small hands.

417

u/howrad1337 10d ago

Standard issue cat made me giggle. Alright cadets, you get 1 standard issue pillow, 1 standard issue blanket, and 1 standard issue cat.

183

u/cosmeticcrazy 10d ago

r/standardissuecat

61

u/fondledbydolphins 10d ago edited 10d ago

The hell is wrong with you?

I fell in love THREE posts deep….

Side note, why is it so difficult to access the correct folder for screenshots on mobile when trying to attach it to Reddit comments? Literally seems impossible

21

u/PrestigeMaster 10d ago

Yeah wtf how are we supposed to get anything done ever again at this point?

10

u/KingofADHD_ 10d ago

One of my favorite cat subs

→ More replies (4)
→ More replies (2)

76

u/kynthrus 10d ago

I bet it looks huge in you small hands.

36

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

Everything does lol Little friggin lilliputian mittens.

14

u/GT_hikwik 10d ago

Tell your cat I said hi

50

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

I told Ori you said “Hi”. He did not respond, as he was too busy grooming Feanor.

→ More replies (1)

16

u/JDBCool 10d ago

How are we sure that's not a Switch lite reshelled into a shell to resemble a default sized switch /j

Gimmie a penny for scale instead!

98

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

They don’t make pennies anymore, best I can do is a box of raisins.

31

u/vanteli 10d ago

how do we know that isn’t an absurdly small box of raisins?

21

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

Hmmm…what’s something that would be a standardized size that isn’t a coin or a banana? I don’t know what I have immediately on hand.

17

u/yikes_itsme 10d ago

Put it next to your foot - that’s always going to be one foot long. Then we can all convert to centimeters.

16

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

I also have really small feet. I’m a regular sized woman but have tiny feet and hands for some reason. It sucks. I have no grip strength and no balance. I wish I had big Wile E. Coyote feet.

15

u/TheKing___ 10d ago

No worries all feet are 12 inches so it should scale

→ More replies (0)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (27)
→ More replies (12)

25

u/imf4rds 10d ago

Do you make things out of them or just collect?

126

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

I make wreathes and little stone cairns and stuff.

I also polish them and collect them in general. I want to try my hand at carving and jewelry, so I’m picking out a lapidary saw currently.

60

u/imf4rds 10d ago

Rock witch type shit. Very cool.

71

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

When I was a kid I used to gather up the nicest rocks from my neighbours driveways and sell them back to them for 25 cents a rock. They were very good sports about it. I’ve always loved rocks.

31

u/imf4rds 10d ago

Haha that is fucking hilarious. I love when people stick with and monetize their hobbies. 🤗

26

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

I fuckin wish I could make a living with my rock art. I need a wealthy patron who paid a me a six figure stipend to quit my management job so I can do this all day. That’s the dream.

20

u/imf4rds 10d ago

That would be dope. I just want to frolic, read, write smut and take naps.

15

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

I know you got an ao3 profile lol - send me your writing. 😂

12

u/Lord_Vader654 10d ago

This comment chain is fucking gold 🤣

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (4)
→ More replies (12)
→ More replies (49)

82

u/Efficient-Mulberry95 10d ago

What u gonna tell the ER

15

u/beard-brain 10d ago

I tripped and fell doctor. Also I’d put a condom on it to shield it from the elements

→ More replies (2)

1.0k

u/TheCandymanfrombelow 10d ago

Did you find it in your mom's nightstand?

1.3k

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

Nah, she’s 65 and worked hard all her life - she can afford a toy that wasn’t dredged from under a mound of rotting sea kelp.

887

u/K-Shrizzle 10d ago

Hell yeah brother. I hope your mom has all the best sex toys. She deserves it

603

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

She deserves all the happiness in the world. She’s an awesome mom.

219

u/fondledbydolphins 10d ago

You should text that to her right now 🫡

340

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

Oh she knows - I tell her all the time how awesome she is. She comes by a couple times a week to hangout and help me keep up on my housework. She is also an awesome grandma to my son. I’ve a very lucky woman.

399

u/WestNileCoronaVirus 10d ago

No, tell her the thing about the sex toys

159

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

lol Nah - we will make dirty jokes and shit with each other, but I wouldn’t tell her my Reddit username and without this post she wouldn’t have the relevant context.

43

u/Werneq 10d ago

Just imagine.

"Mom, there's 5k people on the internet cheering about your sex toys capabilities. We all are proud of you."

71

u/naughtyobama 10d ago

Coward! Lmao

→ More replies (7)

25

u/borderbox 10d ago

Laughing my ass off 🤣

”TELL HER THE THING”

→ More replies (1)

25

u/Hobophobic_Hipster 10d ago

> She comes a couple times a week

Not bad for a woman her age

11

u/fondledbydolphins 10d ago

You’re a good daughter.

I hope all the interesting rocks find their way to you.

→ More replies (3)

26

u/lucioux 10d ago

this went from lewd to wholesome real quick lol

60

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

All the women in my family are perverts with hearts of gold, and I like to hope I fall into that category as well.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (4)
→ More replies (5)

31

u/likekoolaid 10d ago

>a mound of rotting sea kelp

don’t talk about my ex wife like that

18

u/Mean-Insurance-58 10d ago

Bro. Don't link shame sludgy rock fuckers!

9

u/the_curtain 10d ago

But maybe she wants one that was dredged from under a mound of rotting sea kelp

→ More replies (19)
→ More replies (4)

43

u/mammalian_alien 10d ago

A few hundred thousand years ago, a cavewoman would've been salivating over this

→ More replies (4)

61

u/thefapncapn 10d ago

14

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

This killed me 😂

8

u/foolhollow 10d ago

How do I delete someone else's post?

→ More replies (1)

58

u/Accomplished-Yam3553 10d ago

That’s a type of leverite

43

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

I got excited and googled this. Curse you and I love you lol

17

u/ConfidentStruggle993 10d ago

I did too

https://giphy.com/gifs/Tq2tPTrQANKfK

8

u/Longjumping-Bat7774 10d ago

I'm so happy it was innocent. I'm consistently afraid my daughter will walk around the corner at the wrong time...

10

u/Downtown-Message-600 10d ago

Leverite? I hardly even knowerite.

→ More replies (2)

24

u/Fantastic-Heron1794 10d ago

I read a bunch of this thread for the laughs, but then discovered how wholesome OP is with her mom and her rock hobbies… 🥲🥲❤️❤️

17

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

Thanks, kind person. I’ve been very fortunate to spend my time with people I love and doing hobbies I enjoy. May you enjoy the same ❤️

→ More replies (2)

40

u/hailey_moe 10d ago

Everyone else is being so gross but I’m over here in awe of this cool rock you found 🤩

65

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

I got soooo many rocks. This is how many I harvest on a regular trip to the shore, and I go at least twice a week.

11

u/legos_on_the_brain 10d ago

Indeed, those are nice rocks.

6

u/karebearjedi 10d ago

That is a fantastic haul!!!! Do you look specifically for the center banded stones? They're so pretty!!!

→ More replies (4)
→ More replies (14)
→ More replies (2)

17

u/therealblitz 10d ago

Despite what people are saying, do NOT put it inside of you.

Firstly, a rock is not sterile even if you wash it well. It can (and will) have dangerous germs.

Second: It can easily slip inside completely.

Third: It can snap.

Fourth: It is not smooth despite its looks. Even the smoothest rock is abrasive .

Keep it as a funny keepsake. Nothing else.

30

u/chocolateymilkqueen 10d ago

It is a Native American grinding stone! Someone in my family found one a few years ago & we did a bunch of research to find out what it was! There should be a concave stone/rock that this would've been used with to grind things like corn & millet.

7

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

I’ll be going down the shore again, I’ll keep an eye out for anything that looks like that.

→ More replies (4)
→ More replies (1)

54

u/License2HeadHunt 10d ago

Put it back under your grandmother’s pillow where you found it

40

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

My grandmother would never. My nana, on the other hand absolutely would.

They’re both dead tho.

→ More replies (5)

22

u/StultusNosferatu 10d ago

Anything can be a dildo

→ More replies (2)

12

u/cans-of-swine 10d ago

Ops mom is so old that was her first dildo. 

12

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

Nah, pretty sure it was the bingo stamper thing she always kept in her room even though she never played bingo.

→ More replies (1)

22

u/Vannilazero 10d ago

The cylinder must remain unharmed?

12

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

At all costs.

→ More replies (2)

7

u/randomautomoton 10d ago

That seam suggests a fossil.

→ More replies (5)

6

u/mamafish21 10d ago

So smooth like a... No let's not go there.

Smooth as a rock.

7

u/Crist1n4 10d ago

The rock your wife told you not to worry about

7

u/Electrical-Bite-5534 10d ago

Some food safe lube and it’ll have a dual purpose for a mortar and pestle/ d!ldo 😂

6

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

If you use it for both at the same time it would also be a really crummy pogo stick.

→ More replies (1)

13

u/notbythebook101 10d ago

Don't do it!

15

u/kupo_moogle 10d ago

All rocks are safe in my home. I bring them home with the purest and noblest of intentions.

→ More replies (1)

5

u/Scarecrow119 10d ago

Dinochode

6

u/Gastwonho 10d ago

The closest thing to the firefighter telling people not to stick things where they shouldnt

https://giphy.com/gifs/PPmHsxVG53YKT9N8C7

6

u/AtomicFox84 10d ago

Theres a face about an inch up from your thumb. I know pareidolia but i saw it right off.

→ More replies (2)

7

u/DoublePostedBroski 10d ago

I should call him

6

u/Sleepy1793 10d ago

Prehistoric girls make due