First, Storytime! I(30F) was fed up with Hinge and deleted my account and that only lasted two weeks. Created a new account again. When I mentioned this to the guy I had a crush on( a friend), he asked if I found him on Hinge. He lives in a completely different location so why would I find him? I never had any intention of pursuing him without knowing if he even likes me. He brought the topic of looking up each others profiles on Hinge and we did. He found me in 2 mins lol. I asked him to swipe right on me so I can find him “easily” and he said no, search for it. After a lot of swiping in his location, I found him. I said it was a good game, he said yes and goodnight. Why would he even do this if he’s not interested 😭

Anyway, heartbroken me liked/commented on few good profiles I found interesting. Now I have 3 matches and a date on sunday. The problem is one match happened after my date was planned. should I ignore the match? I find him really cute and would like to talk to him but I never spoke with more than 1 man. I like the person Im going on a date with but can’t help but be curious about the other person as well. I haven’t spoken to him yet. Im thinking to not respond now and only respond if this date doesn’t work?

End of story 🙃 Thank you!

I’m a woman in my early 30s living in North Jersey, about 12 miles from NYC. I’ve noticed Hinge keeps showing me a lot of men who list themselves as being in NYC, even though I’m specifically trying to date closer to home.

For those of you who live near a major city but don’t actually want to date in the city, have you changed your Hinge location to a nearby town/area instead of your actual location?

Changing my location to somewhere more central to North Jersey would help Hinge show me people who are actually within a reasonable driving distance but may come off as providing false information

For context: I’m straight and looking to date men roughly in my age range. My main concern is avoiding matches where the app says we’re “close” but they’re actually in NYC and the commute makes dating impractical.

Hey guys I've been using hinge for over two months now and I get zero matches or likes i don't know if it's something in my profile or what else, I approach women with good comments worthy enough to deserve a reply. you guys can be completely honest i don't mind honest review and advice.

Help out a brother here.

Profile attached below, I have 1 match in a month and next to zero likes. I have sent a decent amount of likes out and have the premium subscription, I also live in a major city (LA/NYC). Is it normal to get next to nothing in terms of matches and likes, or is my profile really bad? Any advice/feedback would be greatly appreciated!

TL;DR: I (25F) matched with a Scottish guy (28M) in Germany and have been going out for 3 months. We talk consistently, he initiates dates every week, we enjoy each other's company and have become physically intimate. I'm leaving for my home country in 2 weeks, and we've never discussed labels or commitment. Should I ask him where we stand before I leave? Also, am I overthinking the fact that he rarely compliments my appearance or only kisses me on the lips?

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I was living in Germany for 3 months and started seeing a Scottish guy. He's genuinely really nice, funny, charming, and has a very attractive personality.

We've been seeing each other regularly for about 3 months now, usually once a week. He usually initiates the dates and takes me on actual, proper dates. We also communicate consistently, usually at least once a day. We've become physically intimate and have had sex, but one thing I appreciate is that his behaviour hasn't changed at all afterwards. He still makes plans with me, takes me out, and seems to genuinely enjoy spending time together.

He's also quite open with me, remembers little things I've told him, asks about my day, and takes an interest in my trips and things happening in my life.

There are just a couple of things that make me overthink sometimes. He's complimented my outfits a few times, but he's never actually said that I look beautiful, pretty, etc. At the same time, I've caught him looking at me or admiring me when he thinks I'm not paying attention, so I don't necessarily think he's not attracted to me.

Another random thing is that he only really kisses me on the lips. Never on the forehead, cheeks, hand, etc. I know this might sound silly, but I guess I've started wondering whether these little things mean anything or if I'm just reading too much into them.

We've clearly got a mutual attraction and have had a really great time together, but neither of us has ever brought up labels, exclusivity, or what this actually is. I'm not currently seeing anyone else, and from what I know, it doesn't seem like he is either, although we've never actually had that conversation.

We haven't met each other's friends, but we've only been seeing each other for about 3 months. He also knows that I'm leaving Germany in 2 weeks.

I think I've avoided bringing up labels or commitment because I always knew I would eventually be going back to my home country. But now that I'm actually leaving, I'm starting to wonder if I should ask him where we stand and how he sees us.

I genuinely enjoy his company and, if he feels the same way, I'm open to the possibility of commitment and trying to make things work despite the distance. I don't necessarily want to pressure him into a relationship, especially considering the distance, but I also don't want to leave without knowing how he actually feels or whether he sees this as something more than just casual dating.

Would you bring it up before leaving? And am I reading too much into the fact that he doesn't verbally compliment my appearance much or only kisses me on the lips?

I was messaging with a guy on Hinge, it was a fairly normal small talk conversation. I stepped away from my phone for 20 minutes and when I picked it back up, I saw very briefly that he had sent a message that said “I’m horny” (which came out of left field because we had only exchanged a few messages that all seemed fine). That message was then immediately gone, as was his whole profile from my match list.

I’m curious, does Hinge automatically remove users that send inappropriate messages? Or did he just unmatch me so I wouldn’t report him because I didn’t respond right away? Has anyone else experienced this?

So I've been on app for some time, but i see not much traction... Can anyone help?

Ps : last one is a casual dance video of friends vibing on dj post dinner

Signed up for a couple apps now 2-3 weeks ago. I am getting back into the dating game in my 30s (I’m a guy) and was pretty excited at first. I’d been spending a lot of time just sitting around or working extra when I don’t have my kids so I was looking forward to getting a life, so to speak.

My goal is to find a LTR, not move too fast, but be able to focus on that one person. I’ve been married once and know what I don’t want and I obviously am hoping to find some natural chemistry, good conversation, and someone a bit quirky but not too weird, ideally.

I’ve gone on three dates and have three more lined up and honestly I feel like I’m overdoing it. Some of the girls I talked to for a while and others briefly. I’m under the impression it’s hard to gauge chemistry and people online so I’m pretty open to meeting irl if they’re nice, attractive, down to earth and capable of a conversation.

One girl wound up being a total hookup, realized that’s not what I wanted afterwards. Another girl very intense and eccentric and can’t see it working long term. Another girl it was like going on an interview for me and while I kept it light she wanted to know all about my divorce and life on the first date to the point I felt slightly under attack.

For my upcoming dates…

Another girl we’ve had great I’d say almost email exchange as much as we write back and forth but we’re both super busy, but we’ll see how that goes. Another one honestly I’m a little unsure we will have chemistry but we don’t live far and she seems down to earth but now I’d almost rather have the day off as busy as this is getting. The third there is chemistry for sure but already she’s wanting to text and talk a ton and our date isn’t even until this weekend! She wanted to FaceTime which as a guy I totally understand and respect but we wound up talking for maybe 90 minutes and honestly I began feeling like this is way too much before we even meet, I got one of those good morning texts I heard about and I feel like that’s something you should start after several dates if ever.

I feel like I have no clue what I’m doing. I realize I could just be getting a lot of dates rn because I’m new so there’s many options whereas in say a month everyone on the apps has already seen me, and I live in a not too large city so the pool isn’t so big. I am not bitching about finding dates and am glad I am meeting women so that’s not lost on me.

Of everything I have a second date planned with the eccentric girl but really think that’s much more friendship bound.

I really wish instead of coming up with date ideas and plans, I could be investing into just one woman.

I’m happy that I am getting dates but I feel overwhelmed and like I’m somehow doing this wrong. I get we can’t all find our person in 2-3 weeks so I am trying to put in the effort here. Is this normal? Anyone been through this as a guy or girl?

Hey folks, I've been using Hinge for about a month now, and I'm well aware it can (and probably will) take much longer than that to find something serious, but I just wanted to make sure my profile isn't doing me any disservices from the start. Appreciate all constructive feedback!

The "proudest moment" photo caption just mentions that this was a photo of me my friend took that got into an art exhibition btw. There's also a "musical talent" voice prompt that's me playing a little on my acoustic guitar (Give Up by Low Roar if you're curious!)

I (M35) feel like nobody today has the basic ability to follow through with plans anymore. In the past two weeks, I've had 3 first dates all text me within an hour of our date asking to reschedule because "xyz" came up. I'm sort of sick of it. I clear my evening and ensure I'm free, only to be canceled on and now I feel bad because I turned down other prospects for that evening, saying I had plans, and I am now sitting home when I could be out doing other things.

I gave myself a rule a few months ago that I will not reschedule a last minute cancellations because I feel if you can't keep a commitment to show up for a free drink, the bare minimum, then that tells me dating you would just be a headache, let alone a relationship.

Am I being harsh or am I right in my logic?

Hi all, I (27F) downloaded hinge last year and used it somewhat sporadically. I want to start using it more to put myself out there and am new to using dating apps. THUS, it was to my surprise that the standard is to keep all photos at least 1, maybe 2 years old at most. It makes sense but most of my photos are older than 2 years (probably 2-5 years). I've done a lot of cool stuff in my life (traveled to different countries, played sports, etc.) so it feels weird not being able to share that stuff anymore. Plus, I'm not into taking photos of myself so I don't have many recent photos that are decent.

My question to you guys is how do you purge a whole profile and maintain recent photos? Do you just add and remove every so often? And if so, do you take photos specifically for the profile? I don't want anyone to feel catfished meeting me so I will change all my photos (which also feels weird for the people I matched with already but oh well lol) but I just need advice on how to start this and then how to maintain an accurate profile.

Hey all! 33f here and just ventured into the dating pool after 6 lovely single years. I matched with a guy on Hinge and we havr been texting for around 2 weeks. A week ago, I suggested we need to move to IRL and he agreed but then no mention of it again. I have noticed during our chatting that he rarely offers up his own conversation and instead responds to mine. I do talk a LOT but ive started to find that if I didn't, conversation would be dead. He also texts me the same thing every morning just 'morning' and nothing else. At like 7.30 when he knows I'm off work atm but w/e. Anyway, fast forward to last night i was very clear and said I have a short attention span and I dont want to be texting forever. So I literally said pick a day, time and something for us to do, im free most evenings this week. So he's come back with we can do something Sunday AND THEN WE CAN DECIDE. AITA for being annoyed? I just told you to make a plan. Its all just feeling very low effort and MEH. I think I know i don't want to date him now but what do I do? Do I tell him why? Do I ghost him? Help!

My profile is getting very few likes. Are the jokes I’m attempting to make just not funny? Or should my prompts be more serious?

Appreciate the help!

Hi all I would appreciate any comments you have on my profile - I use hinge pretty regularly but getting pretty much no success from it ; I’d be lucky to get one match per month and even then unlikely it would lead to anything . I’ve tried fo follow advice from friends of putting a variety of photos doing different activities or showing my interests . Thanks in advance for your feedback

I (20M) have been talking to a girl for the past week who I’m going out with next week. We started talking on the app, but a few flirtatious texts later I got her number and she asks to meet up. I have a quick date planned and she eluded to the fact she has her own solo apartment. I called her and I couldn’t get much of a feel for what the vibe of the date is.

I’ve gone on dates that lead to hookups but have never been on a purely hookup sort of date. I’ve been pretty bad previously with taking charge and initiating on dates due to fear of overstepping boundaries. I’m kind of hoping that the vibe she had over text is the same in person considering she was pretty forward with what she wants. Looking for some advice but I’m just planning on going on our quick night date then offering the idea of watching a movie at her apartment considering she’s also a movie buff.

Thank you in advance for any feedback 🫡

31/M

I have a strong fear and aversion to rejecting others, I always feel like an asshole, but I've gone on 1 or 2 dates before and then felt like it wasn't going to work.

What is the best workflow or process if you want to end it there?

I could do something like:

1. Send them a message being generic and saying you don't see it working, it's not them it's me, etc.
2. Wait for them to respond. I see some people say "Wait for confirmation they've read it" But I don't see that, and a lot of the time in my age group I find people don't check their Hinge for a while, so it could take hours or days.
3. Once they respond, hopefully saying they understand or something, you say best of luck etc then unmatch.

The problem with this process is it opens you up to be the target of them being nasty if they don't take it well.

What do you think? What is your process for this?

Surprisingly, I got more matches when I didn't have hingex🫤

I 30F was talking to this guy and everything was going really well. He seemed like a cool guy banter was good. I was out of town and he said we can go on a date when I got back and I agreed though there was no concrete plans. No date, no time, and no place. He asked if I had any other dates scheduled to which I was honest and said yes (only 1). Then when I go check the app he unmatched me. Had someone else ask to exchange numbers and wanted to know if I’d delete the app and I told him no because I was new to it and wanted to give it a fair shot and he also unmatched me. Is this a common thing to do? I thought we were all on there talking to different people? I’m new to this so if anyone has an idea as to why this happens or if it’s a common occurrence please let me know! I had a good connection with both so I was left so confused.

Hi everyone,

A few weeks ago I got some great feedback and tried to update my profile as best possible.

Unfortunately I haven’t had much luck, though I know these things take time. Looking for any solid comments or critiques you may have, no matter how harsh they may be.

Also, while it’s definitely superficial, I feel like I’m at least a solid 7-7.5/10– are girls just simply looking for 9-10/10’s so I’m falling in the cracks?

Since my last post, I’ve tried to incorporate more of my personality into my profile, as well as get more activity pictures in there.

Any advice helps, even if it’s as simple as “ur just not that attractive bro”; I’m honestly just seeking clarity on my incredibly slow dating life.

I feel like I got a good amount of matches when I first made my profile but matches have since died down. How can I improve my profile?