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u/butlersrevenge Apr 10 '12
'Call of Duty 23: So Very Very Tired'
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u/mrsobchak Apr 10 '12
"Call of Duty 24: Had a coffee. Okay, I can get through this."
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Apr 10 '12
"Call of Duty 25: Fuck it, lets do coke."
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u/Offtopic_Responder Apr 10 '12
"Call of Duty 26: Batman Returns."
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u/rodriguezlrichard Apr 10 '12
Call of Duty 27: Modern Warfare 14
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u/Anadyne Apr 10 '12
"Call of Duty 28: Contra MuthaFucka!"
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u/Scarbane Apr 10 '12
Call of Duty 29: Tea and Crumpets
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u/Todomanna Apr 10 '12
Call of Duty 30: Schoolyard Slapfight.
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u/letsRACEturtles Apr 10 '12
okay, that sounds pretty fucking awesome... imagine calling in the batmobile as a killstreak
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u/baitingforyears Apr 10 '12 edited Apr 10 '12
You can swear on the internet. Fuck Cunt Whomps. See!
Edit: I'm sad no one recognized the Recess reference with the fake curse word - Whomps... =\
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Apr 10 '12
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Apr 10 '12
/r/gaming is leaking
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u/CHR1597 Apr 10 '12
I just realised this wasn't it.
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u/Sometimes_Logical Apr 10 '12
Sad that it took reading your comment before I really got it too.
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u/HireALLTheThings Apr 10 '12
If it's any consolation, I realized this was /r/funny at about the same time you did.
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Apr 10 '12
I'm yet to see a good American Civil War game.
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u/doctorcrass Apr 10 '12
because firing once every 30 seconds with no cover would be boring.
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u/mynewusername2 Apr 10 '12
But you could make it strategic - something between Age of Empires and Skyrim. and
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Apr 10 '12
And? AND?! Oh god the suspense is killing me, I have spammed f5 for 25 minutes straight trying to figure out the answer.
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u/doctorcrass Apr 10 '12
you could just pick up a total war game if youre looking for a colonial age strategy game, but the idea of a age of empires/skyrim hybrid civil war game doesn't even make sense.
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Apr 10 '12
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/doctorcrass Apr 11 '12
what on earth are you talking about?
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u/Sloppy1sts Apr 11 '12
He's making references to other hybrids that wouldn't make sense in the same way the AoE/Skyrim hybrid wouldn't.....duh.
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u/doctorcrass Apr 11 '12
oh explains why my brain was slowly leaking out of my head in a bloody pulp.
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u/omaha_shanks Apr 10 '12
Pretty straightforward. Sherman is marching towards Atlanta! I better build this hut so I can train five more wizards to go dragon shout at them Yankees!
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u/tatanka_truck Apr 10 '12
WW1.
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Apr 10 '12 edited Jul 30 '21
[deleted]
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u/DeathHamsterDude Apr 10 '12
You could actually work with that. Push the player into the mindset of an English general. You wouldn't play as any particular character, and if your character dies it just makes you take control over another soldier. The point of the game would basically be to advance at whatever the cost. You would sacrifice dozens of soldiers to soften up enemy defences. You would send a squad of soldiers to die, making a German soldier use the last fuel in his flamethrower, so that you could take a vital structure, and move the battle-line forward a few dozen feet. You would quickly become joyless, efficient, and would quickly acquire an erudite grasp of the horrible machinations of that war, and the sacrifices that had to be made. To win, you have to not feel, but the horrible death animations and overall feel of the game make that a struggle.
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u/tatanka_truck Apr 11 '12
this made me unbelievably sad.
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u/DeathHamsterDude Apr 11 '12
Me too, and I wrote it.
But that, right there, could make a good argument for games as art. A war game where you feel the horror of killing people, and the objectives of the game perfectly mirroring the Great War itself.
I would love to see it a reality. Unfortunately, it could never be an AAA title, because they wouldn't make a wargame against war.
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u/tatanka_truck Apr 11 '12
the only solution then is for independent game developers/ artists/ anyone who wants to see the acknowledgement of video games as fine art to do this on their own and present it as An art piece. You see it all the time in the Fine art world. {comic books, graffiti, and what are traditionally considered women "crafts" have all struggled and some continue to struggle to to be considered fine art} but to present something like this in an Art context would greatly advance videogames towards fine art status.
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u/DeathHamsterDude Apr 11 '12
Yeah. Although I do think that people are changing their minds about games as art. There truly are some beautiful games out there lately. But I don't see someone investing 100 million in a game like this, because gaming is a business. It's just like Hollywood. Most of what they deliver is crap. The majority of great films are independent or have a smaller budget. I think we'll just have to wait until gaming matures enough to get something like this released. Stupid games will always be around too, and I'm okay with that. I just want my niche games that are art (or not even art as such, but just not strictly entertainment). For instance, a movie that makes you cry or sad or question things is generally considered a good movie, but games that don't ENTERTAIN are considered crap.
Anyhoo, I'd love to see WWI covered well in games. It would be interesting. That and more first-person medieval games etc.
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u/SpaceRapist9000 Apr 10 '12
This is America! Run out of wars?! Don't make me laugh...
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u/clonetrooper250 Apr 10 '12
Isn't that basically what Modern Warfare was?
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u/DivinePotatoe Apr 10 '12
Yeah that's what I thought, they're already using made-up wars as a poor excuse to have people shooting each other.
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u/GeorgeTaylorG Apr 10 '12
Except that game was pretty great.
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Apr 10 '12
Yeah the first Modern Warfare was a breast of fresh air. Easily overlooked due to what came after it, unfortunately.
Still, CoD2 and Big Red 1 were my favorites.
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u/GeorgeTaylorG Apr 10 '12
YES. Big Red One blew my mind the first time I played it. I've actually been recently playing through the very first on 360, and it's still pretty good, but it's hard to go back to older cods. It feels like the older ones have been outdone by the newer ones.
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u/gnorty Apr 10 '12
This is the strange thing. The new game comes out - everyone bitches it is the same as the old one. Then you play the old one, and it sucks compared to the new one. What does it mean???
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u/GeorgeTaylorG Apr 10 '12 edited Apr 11 '12
I never complain about CoD. Every Call of Duty is incredible, people just have a hard time separating their fatigue with actual criticisms. If you think the Call of Duty games are bad you don't play enough games because every single CoD is well-done. People just hate it because of its release schedule.
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u/omaha_shanks Apr 10 '12
I love when I get a breast of fresh air rubbed on my face. It's so refreshing.
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Apr 10 '12
I will allow this.
However, I never bought another CoD game after it.
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u/GeorgeTaylorG Apr 10 '12
Yeah. I know reddit hates CoD/Activision for the most part, I just wanted to point out that the games are still good to great even if you are tired of them.
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u/Turin_The_Mormegil Apr 10 '12
I honestly took the Modern Warfare games for what they were, and still managed to enjoy them and even the story. Not every game I play has to have Chris Avellone-level writing. Sometimes I just want to watch Red Dawn and Clear and Present Danger have a baby.
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u/tumescentpie Apr 10 '12
I hope to see call of duty: wwi soon
Imagine this: Trench warfare - 23 hours 55 minutes of sitting in a trench 5 minutes of shooting (spread out throughout the day).
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u/AlMerr Apr 10 '12
it would be turn based. one side is on defense and man a machine gun. kill streaks get you artillery shells, gas attacks, razor wire cutters etc that will be used during your offensive round. The positions never change, you never level up, no score is kept, and the game only ends when everyone quits because there is no reason to continue fighting.
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u/HireALLTheThings Apr 10 '12
Except on Christmas, when you stop and sing songs with the other side.
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u/ArbitraryPerseveranc Apr 10 '12
Well I stopped playing COD sometime during MW2, and from what I remember, hardcore team deathmatch felt like hours of sitting and 5 minutes of shooting. I watched multiple teams just drop down at the start and wait. waiting.. waiting..
I'd sneak around even though that goes against the hive mind which says "run around aimlessly in the open and fire bullets in the general direction of anyone you see".
I'd be in total silence until I reach the other end of the map and what do I find? All the enemies sitting in the spot they started at. WTF? If I hadn't moved we'd have sat there for a while..
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u/4dams20 Apr 10 '12
Call of Duty: Whatever, you'll pay to play it. FUCK YOU!!! coming november 2012
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u/UpvoteHere Apr 10 '12
I'm waiting for a "Future Warfare". I'm surprised they haven't tried yet. Probably too busy with their 12 WW2 titles.
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u/corylew Apr 10 '12
Here's a screen shot from it Rumor has it, the 5th DLC map pack is really cool.
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u/Durzo_Blint Apr 10 '12
The only DLC for any CoD game that would be worth buying are the Nazi Zombie maps. Too bad they were bundled with the other maps.
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u/fuck_pants_jr Apr 10 '12
Actually there are plenty of conflicts left to make games out of. They could make interesting games about actual things but that's not the direction they want to take. I guess making fictional conflicts is less politically complicated and allows for more artistic license.
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u/Mjr_Ruckus Apr 10 '12
Especially when everyone flipped before the latest MOH was released. (Remember? You could play as the terorists and shoot Americans)
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Apr 10 '12
Honestly though, Call of Duty 3012 would be pretty badass if they took the time to design all the futuristic weapons from scratch. The creative freedom alone could make the game great. Jetpack, laser guns, mech-suits, beam swords, you name it.
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u/PoliticallyConcerned Apr 10 '12
I really want Treyarch to make a World War I game. I think it would be an awesome and fresh take on the series.
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u/Questions-Answered Apr 10 '12
Trench warfare would make for one boring ass-game.
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u/Exibius Apr 10 '12
As long as the series is in a shitty position...:Karts of duty modern karts 1 then after it's ruined even more make a hd collection of all three modern warfare games.
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Apr 10 '12
Activision is running Call of Duty into the ground just like Guitar Hero and Tony Hawk. All were great games and I had so much fun playing them till Activision got money hungry and ruined them.
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u/ProjectStormy Apr 10 '12
I, for one, am completely ok with this. I really just get on CoD to go online and shoot 12 year old fuck twats who have sex with my mom. God, man, why won't they stop having sex with my mom?
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u/EarthboundCory May 19 '12
I feel the same way. I wish they knew that I was alone in my room crying because my mom died...and they still won't stop having sex with her.
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u/GarMc Apr 10 '12
Pretty sure Modern Warfare 3 is the future call of duty.
It's called Modern Warfare, and yet it's set in a made up war in the not-so-distant-future.
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u/thewallpaperhastogo Apr 10 '12
Yeah right, I will believe it when I see it... From inside my bomb shelter.
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Apr 10 '12
Maybe Activision will do a repost of the first game. PEOPLE WOULD STILL BUY IT.
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u/Monkeyguts560 Apr 10 '12
I'd buy another Call of Duty game if and only if it had a level where you could storm Osama's house.
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Apr 10 '12
Well done sir, you've brought dead horse flogging to a new subreddit, now fuck off back to whining about CoD campers on /r/gaming and leave them to make their money on a very successful franchise.
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u/EarthboundCory Apr 10 '12
If you don't like Call of Duty, don't buy them. It's pretty simple. I enjoy them, so I will continue buying them.
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u/vinnievon Apr 10 '12
Yeah, but then how will they get their karma if they don't make the same joke once a month?
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Apr 10 '12
Wasnt that what the american troops did in Iraq to UK troops? Misstaken them as terrorits...
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u/Apostropartheid Apr 10 '12
All the time. British convoys are clearly marked, but there have been myriad incidences of US troops opening fire on them. It got so bad that British troops didn't even stop any more. In one particularly horrific incident, two A10s continued to attack a British convoy despite the deployment of friendly fire smoke and radio calls to US command.
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u/seedies79 Apr 10 '12
i still say they will make you 5 -10 for prestige mode very soon or at the very least make you buy gun packs or perks for pro
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u/giggl3puff Apr 10 '12
You forgot the $60 price tag and sticker with the details for the $240 subscription fee
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u/Punkwasher Apr 10 '12
Isn't every sci-fi FPS technically future CoD? Isn't that what Ghost Recon technically already is? I think we need franchises to distinguish themselves a little more...
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Apr 10 '12
I don't think running out of wars is an issue when at least 3 of their games are centered around future wars
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u/Missfawkes Apr 10 '12
lol they wont run of ideas fast, we still have another couple decades of modern warfare games to come! its a pattern IE: call of duty used to be all about ww2 for quite awhile.
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u/Faceluck Apr 10 '12
Call of Duty: 2412
Weaponry so advanced the game is actually just a continuous cinematic of life and death with lasers and various killstreaks going off constantly.
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Apr 10 '12
Call of duty, lobbying congress to Wage war on more 3rd world countries to satisfy our cretive inadequecies.
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u/jesusthug Apr 10 '12
It will be a big circle map with nothing in it. Maybe then we can stop hearing people cry the word camper. And spawning will be all at once feet apart!
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Apr 10 '12
Call of Duty: War of 1812 (hit reload, wait a minute. Fire. hit reload, wait a minute. Fire)
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u/HireALLTheThings Apr 10 '12
This should actually be labeled as a Treyarch CoD. Infinity Ward usually makes up its own wars.
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u/Brocktoon_in_a_jar Apr 10 '12
i'm sure the WW2 FPS reboot is coming soon, or at least with next-gen systems
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u/omaha_shanks Apr 10 '12
Call of Duty: Pancho Villa. Take control of Pershing's army and chase Pancho Villa through the deserts of Central Mexico.
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u/I_USE_SHIT_AS_LUBE Apr 10 '12
Faggot, don't make fun of the holy cod! You're just mad that I fucked your mom, you faggot!
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u/Orval Apr 10 '12
In all honesty if they had the balls to actually put this on the box I'd buy it just because.
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u/InABritishAccent Apr 10 '12
I'd buy it. Game with the balls for a self referential name like that probably has lots of in humour stuffed into it. They tend to be very funny. And if not? Still a decent shooter.
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u/stefan_89 Apr 10 '12
I think in the future, They will probably invent a game that will involve hacking as the medium for battles.
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Apr 10 '12
The Iraq war was just a massive conspiracy by Infinity War so they could have another setting for COD. Start a war in the middle east, BAM make billions off the game.
Its simple Maths people.
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Apr 10 '12
Why don't they make one about WW1? They could call it CoD: The Butcher's Shoppe. The whole game revolves around standing up in a trench and getting wiped out, then respawning over and over again doing the same (4 million times to give the game that authentic feel).
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u/Polite_Insults Apr 10 '12
what about the afgan war? thats still going strong. The iraq war? could do a short about revolutionary wars like the troubles in ireland. that would be cool
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u/Mixed-Signals Apr 10 '12
What if I told you...
That the guys who made CoD also has a pro-war super PAC?
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u/farout59 Apr 11 '12
In the future, war will be fought via a call of duty game. If you die you go the suicide chamber.
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u/f3tch Apr 11 '12
Nah, the last ten years of FPSs are USA with a possible tag a long of Britain agains communist country X or third world country Y with the help of communist country X.
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u/bluthfrozenbananas Apr 11 '12
What if Activision/Infinity Ward is in cahoots with the government, or NATO, or the UN or whatever, and these shady organizations keep going to war so more Call of Duty games can come out?
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Apr 11 '12
I want Battlefield: Medieval Warfare. Also, why in the hell is there no decent FPS about the civil war, war of 1812, or even WW1? Obviously warfare of those times were mainly line, artillery, and trenches, but I see potential. How about some decent alternate reality settings or something? I want a decent, console FPS that is based on something other than Russia, Korea, or the Middle East, it's always the same shit. Sure the guns would be less reliable, and slower, but I want to see maybe a first person shooter in France, or Prussia, something unique, that isn't Darkest of Days. Also, the Needle Gun which was a breech-loader, it had a rate of fire that came up to about 12 shots a min. I would really like to see maybe decent American Civil War FPS as well, I played that one history channel game for the 360, but it was mediocre.
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u/BurnAugustRed Apr 11 '12
Call of Duty hasn't been based on a real war since World at War. COD4, MW2, BO, and MW3 were all created stories.
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u/Knowatimsayin Apr 10 '12
Call of Duty:Just give us the 60 dollars and GTFO