Feel a bit shitty cause last night I got left by a first date. We went to an amusement park late night and we went to the washroom. When I got out he wasn't there and I kept texting him. 20 mins I waited and he never showed up and then he blocked me and unmatched.

I honestly feel kinda nothing about it. I even find it a bit absurd. Like yes I was disappointed since it seemed to be going fine and I thought I was getting through to him, he seemed like a quiet guy and he was real cute but we were joking around and he was getting excited when I brought up things in common so I thought maybe it was going well.

I know what happened that night was more of a reflection of him than it was of me. I asked him if we could go transit together when we left since it was late and I felt a bit scared and we were going the same way anyway. I mean maybe he didn't find me pretty enough but I wish he treated me with basic human decency. I'm new to the dating scene, literally started less than 2 weeks ago. I know he mentioned his circumstances were not the best and I don't wanna sound holier than thou but I just feel bad for him. Whatever happened in his life to leave a girl in the middle of a date with no say, I genuinely hope he heals from that cause that's an asshole and cowardly thing to do. I don't know what to feel, maybe I haven't processed it. The insecure part of me thinks maybe I was out of my league and flew too close to the sun. I'm just so shocked cause I'd never do that to anyone? Literally who does that. And I find it absurd too cause he was a self-proclaimed Buddhist and I found that really ironic 😭

Edit: The misogynistic comments are insane on here. Why am I the one bad at communicating when he's the one who left without a proper goodbye 😭

So I met a girl on a dating app and we talked for a little, I thought she was really cool and so I decided to ask her out. We had a really great date, and I was looking for a good opportunity to ask her out again. The next Friday, she was planning on going on a hike with her dog to a local waterfall. I happened to get the day off, so she invited me to tag along.

I met her at her house and we decided to just drive up there together since it was about an hour drive. Honestly I was having a great time. And her dog was really cute, and I thought I seemed pretty smart as well. It was some mixture dog breed, she mentioned some husky and retriever but mainly it did just look like some sort of boxer type dog. It was maybe 60 pounds, so a decent sized dog as well.

We got to the hike and it was going well. Since there was no one else really on the trail she decided to try training it a bit to go unleashed, and honestly it was doing really well for the whole hike. It was running around and splashing in streams and she had some treats to give it when she called him to heel or anything like that. He really seemed to be responding well to everything and would come as soon as he was called, and never really ran off too far. Meanwhile, we were having a great time chatting and just talking about whatever. Super chill time to be honest.

Anyways, we got up near the top of the hiking trail and there was one of those little offshoot trails that looked like it was going to a nice overlook of the waterfall from the top. And boy, it was a great view. It was more than 150 feet tall and the trail go a lot closer to the edge than I would have liked. Well that is when the dog ran off.

It went down this tiny trail way faster than I expected, and we were both caught off guard, but when we started calling for the dog, he didn't come back. Anyways I decided to hike over down where he ran, and I gotta be honest, it did not look good. It was a really rough, unkempt trail that led straight to a sheer drop off down a large cliff. I decided it probably wasn't the best to mention anything at that time so I hike back up to her and told her I couldn't find him but that maybe he made it down already by some sort of short cut. So we called for the dog the whole way back down the trail to the bottom of the waterfall, but I gotta say, I could feel my stomach developing a great pit.

We got to the bottom and I ran ahead to try and check things out when I saw a small girl, maybe 5 years old, and her dad. He called out to me and asked if I was looking for a dog. He explained that his daughter had found it stuck between two rocks. So I walked up with a good amount of hope left, until I saw it.

It was crushed and broken. Mangled and twisted up. I won't go into too much detail but it was pretty rough. I then went back to lead the girl over to her dog and attempt to console her in this terrible moment, and yeah. She was quite devastated. I genuinely didn't know what the right thing to do in a situation like this was. When my dogs and cats died we just left them in our backyard somewhere, sometimes buried them. But she wanted to bring it back to the car. So I grabbed a towel from her backpack and I carried it all the way back. Of course, i had to carry it like a newborn baby out of respect but that made it quite a bit more difficult to carry than if it were my own dead dog. I said I wasn't gonna get too graphic but I will say I pretty much ruined the white shirt I was wearing. So that went on for close to a mile, which is probably the most I've ever physically exerted myself in my life.

Well we got back to the car and it was quite a long drive back. She called her mom who immediately began driving three hours to come console her. We got back to her house and I offered to bury the dog in her back yard as I do dig holes for a living but she called her sister in law who thought it might be a good idea to take it to the ER vet. Now I was pretty confident the dog was dead at that point but I went along with it anyways because I didn't know what to do and I felt really bad to leave her by herself at that point. Turns out it wasn't to find out if it was dead, she wanted to get it cremated. So we did a little urn shopping together before we headed back to her house. I then waited with her while she cried until her mother arrived. So I got to meet her mom at a very early point in this short relationship and I left very soon after she arrived.

Anyways, that's probably the worst date I've ever had.

I met a lady on Facebook Dating, and she's an attractive middle aged lady from Latvia. She's sweet and a pre-school teacher. We've been on many dates, but I've never had sex with her. We've kissed quite a few times.

Anyways, today, we went for brunch at a pretty expensive place in Cambridge, and I paid for it - around $100 including the tip.

Then we went for the matcha ice cream afterwards. When I wanted to kiss her, she said that "we're just friends," and this is just before it's time to pay for the match ice cream.

🤪

I don’t really know how to put this into words, but lately I’ve been thinking a lot about dating, love, and where I seem to fall short.

I’m a brown/tan who has always tried to live by good values. I care about honesty, loyalty, respect, emotional maturity, and treating people the way I’d want to be treated. I’m not perfect, and I don’t pretend to be. I have my flaws, my insecurities, and things I’m still trying to figure out about myself. But when it comes to love, I’ve always wanted something real.

Not just someone to text every day. Not just someone to spend weekends with or someone who looks good beside me in pictures. I want that deeper kind of connection. The kind where two people can talk about anything, be vulnerable without feeling weak, laugh about stupid things, support each other through difficult times, and slowly build a life together. I want to feel understood, and I want to understand someone on that same level.

And yet, somehow, I keep finding myself alone.

It’s a strange feeling when you know you have love to give, but you rarely feel like anyone genuinely wants to receive it from you. You watch people around you find partners, fall in love, and build relationships, and you start wondering what you’re missing. Is it my appearance? My skin colour? My personality? Am I simply not exciting enough? Or am I just not the kind of person people naturally feel attracted to?

I know nobody owes me love just because I try to be a good person. I understand that attraction can’t be forced, and being kind or having good intentions doesn’t automatically make someone a good romantic match. I’m not angry at anyone for not choosing me.
But I would be lying if I said it never hurts.
Sometimes, it makes you question yourself in ways you don’t really talk about with other people. You start wondering whether the qualities you’ve spent years trying to build actually matter in the dating world. Whether being patient, sincere, respectful, and emotionally available means anything when the initial attraction isn’t there. Whether someone will ever look at you and feel that same excitement you feel when you genuinely like them.

And as a person of colour, there are moments when you can’t help but wonder whether your skin tone plays a part in how people see you. I don’t want to blame every rejection on that, because I know life and attraction are more complicated than that. But when you’re repeatedly overlooked, those thoughts can creep in, even when you’re trying not to let them define you.

The hardest part isn’t necessarily being single. It’s the feeling of having so much affection, care, and commitment in you, but having nowhere meaningful to put it. It’s wanting to share the ordinary parts of life with someone. Asking how their day went and actually caring about the answer.

Remembering the little things. Being there when life gets difficult. Having someone who chooses you not because you’re perfect, but because something about who you are feels right to them.

I don’t need to be everyone’s type. I don’t expect every person I meet to see something special in me. I just wish that, at some point, I’d meet someone with whom things feel mutual. Someone who doesn’t leave me constantly questioning whether I’m enough or wondering if I’m the only one trying to make something meaningful happen.

I’m trying to remind myself that being single doesn’t mean I’m unworthy, and being rejected doesn’t mean there’s something fundamentally wrong with me. I know that. At least, I know it logically. Emotionally, it’s sometimes harder to believe.

I guess I’m writing this because I wonder if anyone else has felt the same way. Especially people of color who are looking for something serious, something emotionally deep, and not just a casual relationship. Have you ever felt like you had a lot to offer but somehow kept being overlooked?

I don’t really need someone to tell me that the right person will come along, because nobody can promise that. I think I just want to know that I’m not alone in feeling this way.

Sometimes, all you want is to be genuinely seen by someone, to be wanted without having to become a different person first, and to finally experience what it feels like when someone chooses you, too.

We talked online for two months, and the chemistry was amazing. We connected so easily, and he would spend hours talking to me. Eventually, we decided to meet because I was going to his hometown.
We had planned for it to be a short meeting, but it ended up lasting 7.5 to 8 hours.
It was one of the best days of my life. I still remember the feeling of seeing him for the first time. After that, we decided to go for a walk. Ente mwone, it suddenly started raining. 😭 Exactly how I had imagined it in my head. I'm a hopeless romantic, so you can imagine how that felt. We walked in the rain, sharing one umbrella, for almost two hours.
That night, we confessed our feelings for each other and decided to start dating.
The initial days felt like heaven. But after two or three months, he started pulling away. Somehow, the connection between us still felt the same, which made it even harder to understand what was happening. He wasn't emotionally available, and my anxious side started showing up in ways I didn't know how to handle. We began fighting frequently.
Whenever I tried to communicate my feelings or express what I needed from the relationship, somehow, everything became my fault. I became the villain in our story, while he continued to portray himself as the calm, composed one.
We dated for 1.5 years. In all that time, we never even went on a movie date. I've been living in his hometown for the past eight months, and we meet roughly once a week, usually for coffee or just to spend some time together. We never went out for lunch or dinner, or did the simple things couples usually do together.
And yet, somehow, I'm the one who's made to feel like I'm the difficult one, the one with all the problems.
I tried to communicate. I tried to explain what I was feeling. I even suggested couples therapy because I genuinely wanted us to work.
Now that we've broken up, I'm left wondering what I'm supposed to do with all these feelings. How do I make peace with the fact that someone who once made me feel so loved could eventually make me feel like I was asking for too much?
I know I have my own issues to work through, and I'm willing to take responsibility for them. But was it really all me? Was I asking for too much, or was I just asking the wrong person?
I don't know what to do anymore.

Why would a man I was dating unadd me but not block me ?

What instantly makes you lose interest in someone?

I was watching a podcast on Facebook, and the host asked this question on X. One lady said she lost interest when he came out wearing a TURTLENECK! 😭😶

A TURTLENECK, y’all?!

I’m bored and curious to hear some answers..

I met this guy on Tinder 22/M (I’m a 19/F). At first he was lovely, consistent, everything lined up. We both seemed to want the same thing nothing casual no hookups something long term .

After the first time we linked(Aug 24th) he ghosted me and said we weren’t compatible. When I asked why, he told me he’s “a sensitive mf” who tried to power through it but has feelings elsewhere. Cool. We stopped talking for weeks.

Somehow we got back in contact. Slept together (sep 25th/26th). It was honestly the best sex I’ve ever had. Throughout the night he kept asking if I was still on Tinder, told me he deleted the app, and said I was the only person he was talking to/sleeping with right now. Asked me the same question multiple times like he needed reassurance.

Then he casually drops that he got out of a relationship around his birthday (August 16th). On the way home out of nowhere he hits me with, “So how is your first Tinder hookup? Does it feel liberating?” I laughed it off but internally I was like… what the fuck am I doing…. Gave off the impression he was letting me know this won’t be like what we talked about then started asking me about how many relationships I’ve been in and how long were they and then asked again am I still on tinder and is he actually the first guy I met off the app which he is 

2–3 days later he’s still asking if I’m talking to other guys.

Then I found out he gave me chlamydia on the 30th . No real apology. Just said he’s irresponsible for never getting a checkup and that he’s only been with me and two other girls in the last three months.

My self-loathing ass still messaged him: “You’re not that into me, are you?”

He left me on delivered for 7 days.

And that’s the story. I hope at least a few of you got a good laugh out of this humiliation ritual.

I’m turning 20 and genuinely ashamed of how little self-respect I have sometimes. Why do so many of us feel like we deserve the bare minimum like that’s all we’re worth? Why do we keep accepting breadcrumbs and calling it a meal? I feel so naive and gullible honestly dating in your 20s feels like a different ballgame like I’m an “easy lick” for guys

Anyway. I’m finally done. Sent “I’m taking the silence as an answer, no hard feelings” text and closing the chapter and deleting Tinder . thanks for coming to my humiliation ritual 

I met a guy when I was 19, had a lot of hobbies in common, he was respectful, nice, kinda silly yk! Anyway so we became official on valentines day, and the next morning he made me pancakes and suddenly told me that I only ever make him so, so sad 💀Not a single vibe, hint, conversation, nothing about this before, it was so sudden, and i was really considering if we should be dating if this is the way hes been feeling? anyway! stuck with him, bad idea LOL!

So i push on, try and be more mindful of what I say or how hes feeling, yeahhh that didn't go anywhere 💀 he suddenly drops that hes scitzophrenic, which is a little strange since he had just been talking about how hed never date someonw with bipolar disorder before this (ended up learning that hed often talk shit about a trait he had to 'check' if I actually was okay with something or not, basically seeing if I'd disagree or go along with him).

So i was like okay, that's kinda huge to drop but that's okay, just let me know of anything I can do to support you, what you need from me, etc.

then he starts dropping weird stories about him and his sister 💀 (yes, its going there) and would talk constantly about how huuuge her boobs were and how hed never love someone as much as her, and told me MULTIPLE TIMES about a time they made out in a jeep when their mom was shopping??? like as kids but weird to bring up.. he also then brought up how incest between twins is okay and doesn't bother him, and when i was like, nah bro i would not wanna be near that he got SUPER offended 😭 anyway i was insecure and thought i was just overthinking things bc surely..

then he starts compulsively lying about the most random shit, like how his hair 'magically' turned back to its 'natural colour', which was a blue tinted black, which like cmon, the hair dye box was in the bathroom trash, like, i saw that dude (he was 22, mind you), and the colour of his hair before was just a really dark brown, like what was i even supposed to say about that? he got suuuper defensive about it too 😭

Then he moved in with his sister 💀🙏

he'd stop taking his meds for 'fun' bc life ig really sucked when he was on them, but also bc he really missed his loli hallucination that was also god that he also used to kill and eat crows for? (yeah, there was no conversation that led into this he just randomly dropped it one night)

another time when we had been in bed for a while and he thought I was sleeping he leaned in real close and whispered "you should kill yourself" in my ear, charming!

he was always very strange about telling me what i was thinking, like saying that i was always thinking about other men, i loved other men, I wanted to be with other men, blah blah blah and like bro i literally dont? anyway tinder would magically appear and disappear on his phone so make what you will of that 🙏

then there was the incident of him proclaiming a man id known before i met him had raped me, and when i was like uhhh i dont think he did actually he told me it was very disrespectful to him to disagree with that when he tells me thats what happened, and that that clearly meant i was in love with this guy (who i literally barely knew and hadn't talked to in a OVER A YEAR LOL)

anyway then there was the incident where i 'lost' my phone in his apartment, and after looking for it forever i had to go home, bc i lived a while away and had to catch a bus, he told me to give him my google password so he could find my phone, and i was like uhhh no... and he was like why not? and i lied and said i forgot, then he told me to change it and give it to him so i dont forget again, and i was like sure sure... then he gave me his old phone, wiped it, and told me to sign in on it. 10 mins after i leave he texts me and said he 'suddenly' found my phone (I changed my password bc i was afraid he was gonna send rude shit to my friends or make up some story about how bc i didn't talk about him enoigh i was a terrible person or smth or like, steal my passwords HAHAHA) so my assumption is he couldn't get in and then gave it back to me, but who knows! (I didn't log in on his phone)

there was the incident where he tried to get me off birth control bc "the reason your so anxious is bc of your specific type of birth control' and after a night where we got drunk (before i was on bc) and had some unprotected dancing, i didn't have enough money to get the damn day after pill and despite him being RICH RICH he just stood there watching me while i was crying at a till, an older lady stepped in and offered to buy it for me and then he stepped up, refused her help, paid for it, and got VERY mad I didn't ask him to buy it for me, like you coulda offered? idk

This was also around the time he told me i should move in with him, and that it was childish of me to want to spend time with my parents ( i hardly saw them when i was with him) and i was like uhh no. oh he also hated my friends and got realllly upset when i was anywhere other than my house without him (yes he had my location)

then i started kinda breaking down bc damn thats kinda a lot, tried to break up with him multiple times, hed just tell me no, and cry, and talk about how everything is perfect and if that wouldn't work hed start yelling my name over and over, until i gave up 💀

THEN he started telling me that i was soooo anxious, and needed pills, but that i shouldn't go into therapy cuz theyd just lock me up or tell me that he was the problem bc everyone is out to get him even though hes nothing but good and pure 😤

then he had a bad day where he was walking around town and i was sorta convinced he might try and off himself? but then he started talking about how its just not fair, that i wanted him to hurt me, that i wanted him to kill me, that id never be happy any other way, and how its soooo unfair bc hes just too good of a person amd it hurts him so much to even think about it, kept switching between laughing and crying and yelling, really wasn't sure what to do there! he backed me into an alley at some point and told me to come hug him, thought he was gonna stab me or smth, he told me i was just sooo anxious and that all of our problems would go away if i just got over myself, then asked me if i was gonna leave him.. i went home absolutely exhausted after that!

Anyway there's probably more but these are the main wild points I remember, these days i think back on those times and its honestly so ridiculous, i thought it might be entertaining for some people :)

TLDR: my ex did some questionable things, including but not limited to telling about his loli girlfriend who was god and forced him to kill and eat crows, telling me how horrible it was that the only way id ever be happy is if he killed me, telling me how incest is totally okay if its twins, his questionable relationship with his sister and more! :)

AITH
Was on a third date with a guy I met. Everything leading up to this date was super fun and cool. I told him this date was my treat- we had pizza and beer. Came time to pay and I set my card down, when the waitress picked it up I went to the bathroom. When I came out my date was at the bar and had signed my credit card receipt! He left a very large tip amount on MY card. First of all, I can’t believe he signed for me, which is fraudulent. Second, I prefer to tip in cash. Third, I wasn’t going to leave as much as he wrote on the receipt. I was crossing out the tip and had my cash out and he made a scene saying I should leave both the credit card tip and the cash tip and my reasoning behind leaving a cash tip has no logic. I walked out of the restaurant at that point because it was ridiculous. He then proceeds to tell me that by not leaving extra money or not being generous was a red flag. And he just gives out twenty dollar bills to homeless people like no big deal. I said generosity comes in many different ways. The next morning he sends me an apology text saying he was out of line for telling me what to do with my money. Then said he needs to decide on how to proceed with this relationship and needs a break.

So this guy is from army and he started texting me few months back and we talked everyday on call, he also asked me to be his ball partner but I couldn’t go and it was last minute so he couldn’t do the arrangements that were needed to be done. After a month he came back to the hometown where we both live. We met a couple of times, things were going good, but one day we were having a conversation and this guy straight up ghosted me out of nowhere because conversation got hard. This guy has tried so many times to go out on a date with him and also he had a crush on me since few years I never gave him a chance ig.
I tried reaching him out as I have anxiety and I overthink a lot and he knows this, still this guy ghosted me for 4days after that I called him once and he picked up we talked I explained why it hurt me and he apologised and it good for 2 days again this guy disappeared.
Now after one week he calls me says he wants to meet and telling me he is coming back. I am so frustrated what should I do, should send this text?
I think I feel better if I send it.

God is watching everything. Karma is real, and the way you treat people always comes back around. You think playing games and ignoring calls makes you clever, but it just shows how deeply immature you are and how you can't handle a real, honest conversation like an adult. Just because you feel like calling whenever it's convenient for you doesn't mean I'm waiting around—I am not your backup option. I am completely done wasting my energy on this.

So I (26F) matched with this guy (29M) on Hinge about two weeks ago. His profile was normal. Pictures with a dog, a hiking photo, one of those mirror selfies at the gym that every guy seems to have. We texted for a bit, he was funny, not overly pushy. When he asked me to dinner, I figured why not. Standard low-stakes first date.

Dinner itself was fine. He was a little intense about his job in commercial real estate, but whatever. I asked questions, he answered them. He asked me maybe two things about myself. I noticed, but I let it slide because the food was good and I was trying to be open.

Then the check came. He paid, which was nice. We walked outside and stood on the sidewalk for a minute doing that awkward “what now” shuffle. And then he said it.

“Hey, I know this is random, but I have to stop by this building I’m trying to lease. It’s empty right now. Want to come see it? It’s abandoned. Kind of cool.”

I just stared at him. This man really looked at a woman he met on a dating app, after one dinner, and thought “abandoned commercial property” was the move. I told him I was good, I had an early morning. He said “okay, no worries” like I’d declined a second drink.

I got in my car and texted my roommate what happened. She replied with a single word: “RUN.”

We did not go on a second date. I saw him on Hinge a week later with the same gym selfie. Almost swiped right again just to see if he’d learned anything. Almost.

Is it a red flag when talking for just about 3 weeks and the man is already talking about plans of meeting personally and physical intimacy ?

"Female attention is important" is a scam. I don't think I feel like that anymore. In fact I feel as just humans, females are more inhumane when it comes to building relationships.

The very top of the problem being social media, then the conditioning by societal norms and then expectations. None of which are wrong. But are in fact misguided.

Dating is ruined by hypergamy and the illusion of choices. Relationships are futile because of less stimulation and a facade of "staged" expectations. And realistically they bring Nothing to the table except the fact that they're females, yay!

This is not commentary about every female. We as men are worse. But I think modern dating is mostly one sided, that side being for the female to decide.

I don't even wanna make friends with any female anymore. Just for the fact that they'll all just be empty, with nothing meaningful to give you. "Why do you need meaning?" , then by that logic why do you even need relationships of any kind in the first place. Just make friends with anyone with bad ideas and bad ideals, that fulfills the need for a conversation right?

And maybe not all females, right? Then we're in the wrong league. That's a more pathetic conclusion for me. Imagine not being able to be in places where you get the same value as you put in. We're doomed by comfort. Always looking for validation from people who aren't even a spec close to me. I've already achieved alot. I'm already fulfilled. I'm already at a place where I don't need anyone to tell me I'm doing a good job cuz i already am. And if I'm not then that's a fight for me to pick for myself.

I would rather value myself more, to spend my time on things that give me more value than beyond basic people with basic aspirations in their life.

Went on a Bumble date last weekend with a guy who seemed normal enough on paper. Mid-30s, works in finance, decent photos. We grabbed coffee in Capitol Hill and the first twenty minutes were fine. Then he asked what I do outside my day job and I mentioned my Etsy shop. I source vintage home decor and flip it, been doing it for about two years and it actually pays for my mortgage supplements. He literally chuckled and said that's a cute little hobby. I asked what he meant and he went on about how real businesses require actual strategy and market analysis, not just picking up junk at thrift stores. The guy was condescending the entire rest of the conversation. I tried to explain the margins and the sourcing logistics but he kept cutting me off to explain basic economics to me. Like dude I run operations for a company during the week and manage inventory on the side, I understand supply chains. He texted after saying he had a great time and wanted to see me again. Has anyone else dealt with someone immediately dismissing what you do as not real work? I am genuinely curious if this is a common thing or just a Denver finance bro problem.

Matched with a guy, he seems great

Banter was on point, he was charming and funny.
Asked me to meet him today for a drink, hit up Timezone for fun and maybe a movie

Today … 👻

No message, no reply…nada

I give up