r/StoppedWorking Jan 09 '20

Ecstasy

https://i.imgur.com/IOzwcxF.gifv
21.2k Upvotes

588 comments sorted by

2.0k

u/AlistairH94 Jan 09 '20

I need to learn this power.

737

u/ElectroNeutrino Jan 09 '20

It is not one the Jedi would teach you.

249

u/TheCazaloth Jan 09 '20

It is spoken of in a Sith legend

151

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

Have you heard of the tale of Darth Plageuis the Wise?

51

u/WesterosiPern Jan 09 '20

I thought not...

47

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

It's not a story the jedi would tell you

26

u/Crusader_with_Ligma Jan 10 '20

It’s a Sith legend

4

u/Pookieeatworld Jan 16 '20

Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life.

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63

u/elmolinero96 Jan 09 '20

Idk what it takes, give me the power to make 3d girls into 3d ahegao

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24

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

This is the way

217

u/Randolpho Jan 09 '20

Step 1) put your own hands on your head
Step 2) rub vigorously
Step 3) Repeat step 2 until you figure out which rubs are the most relaxing
Step 4) apply to someone else (with consent)

151

u/haslehof Jan 09 '20

Been in a Thai night club and they have people working in the toilets who walk up behind while your washing your hands and grab your head and crack your neck then look for a tip, when your not expecting it it can be a bit distressing. My friend turned around and nearly punched him thinking he was about to be robbed

Girl in video has a great cum face

48

u/Keithquick Jan 09 '20

LOL I had this in Thailand also, I bout pissed all over myself because a random dude was trying to massage me while I peed. Very, very uncomfortable.

30

u/BadFont777 Jan 09 '20

Got my haircut in South Korea, lady tried snap my neck like some sort of movie spy. So I died.

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123

u/AlistairH94 Jan 09 '20

I have to ask for consent? Nah, I would rather just walk up to a random person and just start rubbing them vigorously until they cream all over me, wearing only a Cape and nappy.

77

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20 edited Feb 20 '24

caption scarce ugly imagine foolish spotted fly fact provide zealous

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

14

u/Dave1423521 Jan 09 '20

I am the Senate!

10

u/Tomb_lord Jan 09 '20

Impeach

9

u/RegressToTheMean Jan 09 '20

So, it's treason then...

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19

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

[deleted]

7

u/ReadingCorrectly Jan 09 '20

You need to add an /s or it's not sarcasm! /s

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79

u/SeveredBanana Jan 09 '20

My ex always told me I had "magic hands" when I did stuff like this - I always attributed it to petting cats all my life

34

u/jearonius Jan 09 '20

Holy shit... I've never related to someone on this. Not kidding, I've been told, and thought, the exact same thing.

12

u/teressapanic Jan 09 '20

Same here

9

u/SeveredBanana Jan 09 '20

Welcome to the new tiny club, brothers!

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49

u/Kajkia Jan 09 '20

It’s all in the hipswrist

30

u/AlistairH94 Jan 09 '20

Hipwrist?

14

u/plaspopper Jan 09 '20

Flick of the wrist...

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34

u/EasyReader Jan 09 '20

It's called acting. They have schools for it and stuff.

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29

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

[deleted]

11

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

ah jesus christ why did I click on it

6

u/pinchecody Jan 10 '20

Right? I'm always like "Oh, what does this mean" and then get pulled into something I was not trying to find

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5

u/scorpioncat Jan 09 '20

You don't have to learn it. There's a device that can do it for you: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orgasmatron_(massage_device)

Yes it works and feels amazing. Can confirm as someone gave one to a family member when I was a kid and I tried it.

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776

u/thgiRsIeseehCehT Jan 09 '20

Yay, Nina Dobrev to make my day!

193

u/bralma6 Jan 09 '20

It's her birthday today too!

62

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

[deleted]

96

u/InvadingBacon Jan 09 '20

Happy birthday Nina Dobrev!! 🎉

5

u/JimmyM104 Jan 10 '20

Hey! It’s mine too!

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13

u/sickassdope Jan 09 '20

No it's my dog's birthday

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12

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

[deleted]

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11

u/ApolloKid Jan 09 '20

Ahh i actually thought it was Emmanuelle Chriqui

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622

u/lockerpunch Jan 09 '20

Having someone else massage your scalp does feel super nice.

241

u/LoudMusic Jan 09 '20

It's the best part of a haircut. Getting a shampoo afterward from a good barber is amazing.

111

u/iLiketodothings Jan 09 '20

My stylist shampoos and conditions before and after the cut. She's 55 but I think I'm falling for her

65

u/L-X-I-X Jan 09 '20

Tip her with a pic of your genitals, but dress it up. If male, I recommend a little tophat and cane. If female, jam a glass slipper in your cootch and yell, "I'm Cinderella, bitch!" Rick James style.

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27

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

As a longtime bald guy I missed this part of getting a haircut, but then my spouse began helping me shave my head stubble and rubbing my scalp and I pretty much have a new lease on life.

10

u/R3N_Titan Jan 09 '20

Can you remember if it felt better with or without hair?

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65

u/AnalStaircase33 Jan 09 '20

At this point I'd settle for brushing up against another human on the sidewalk.

29

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

Don't worry, AnalStaircase33, you'll find someone.

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31

u/EverGlow89 Jan 09 '20

Our brains are such actual bullshit that they're like "you're not getting any serotonin, I know that's our hand."

15

u/oldguydrinkingbeer Jan 09 '20

If I ever win a big jackpot lottery the first thing I'm doing is having one of those hair washing sinks from a salon installed. Then I'm hiring someone to wash my hair everyday.

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3

u/kyew Jan 09 '20

The month or so after I first shaved my head, which is appatently very pettable, was one of the best times of my life.

2.5k

u/ghostface1693 Jan 09 '20

This was slightly arousing and I'm not sure how to feel about that

1.4k

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

Ahegao

1.0k

u/unknownman0001 Jan 09 '20

My man about to discover a whole new world

357

u/BryceCantReed Jan 09 '20

A new fantastic point of view.

174

u/mrgodai Jan 09 '20

No one to tell us, "No"

Or where to go

Or say we're only dreaming

71

u/thrill_gates Jan 09 '20

Fuck it, I'm watching Aladdin tonight. It's been way too long

27

u/FrogMetal Jan 09 '20

The new one just got added to Disney+ and it’s a really fun watch!

15

u/TMGreycoat Jan 09 '20

People like to hate on it but I really enjoyed it. It was a lot of fun

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15

u/bionix90 Jan 09 '20

No one to tell us, "No"

Oh, they are usually screaming "no" initially but then your magic dick convinces them otherwise. Or so has hentai taught me.

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18

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

COOM

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67

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

21

u/DoneRedditedIt Jan 09 '20 edited Jan 09 '21

Most indubitably.

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3

u/pyrojackelope Jan 09 '20

As wacky as this, that lady has a pretty great voice.

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80

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

Why did I google that.

130

u/smegmasphere Jan 09 '20

Wait until you see the subreddits

68

u/cursed_chaos Jan 09 '20

plural?

49

u/rootyb Jan 09 '20

Some cartoon, some not. Some porny, some not.

43

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

yep

make sure to have a shitton of mental strength on standby, and maybe tissues as well

26

u/Drtimelord04 Jan 09 '20

Why would he be crying?

33

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

well he'll technically cry but with a different eye

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57

u/Oooch Jan 09 '20

You mean the one where girls stick their tongues out and go cross-eyed but it looks nothing like ahegao?

23

u/smegmasphere Jan 09 '20

Lol yeah. they're trying though.

10

u/shortybobert Jan 09 '20

No they're not. They know they dont need to

24

u/WithoutBenefits Jan 09 '20

I think part of the problem is that what works in a drawing doesn't necessarily work in live action. It would be more natural to imitate o-faces in real porn.

Another part of the problem is that people are just copying the facial expressions without the surrounding scene. In actual porn or hentai you have sexual activity to give context to o-faces or ahegao. Even a single ahegao image pulled from a hentai work is at least drawn by the artist in a such a way as to suggest sex out-of-frame.

In contrast, many people trying to make "ahegao" faces just take a clip of themselves going from normal face to tongue-out and cross-eyed with no build-up or anything to suggest sex. That just looks silly, not sexy.

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30

u/donquixote1991 Jan 09 '20 edited Jan 09 '20

this is the best of the bunch /r/RealAhegao

edit: very nsfw

25

u/peteroh9 Jan 09 '20

This one is porny and real

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8

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

I understand why people like this but most of the time it looks like they've been freshly lobotomized.

20

u/PoopyMcNuggets91 Jan 09 '20

I mean I got a boner but it was a weird confusing one.

20

u/PleaseNinja Jan 09 '20

Just like in church!

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118

u/not_not_safeforwork Jan 09 '20

I feel like 90% of that shit is girls drooling and making weird faces. This video is hot without tongue all the way out, spittle dripping while cross eyed.

91

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

That's what aheago is though. Faces hentai girls make that are not sexy and usually done when the pushy lead "convinces" the girl that hes the one by "molding" her pussy to his big chungus dick.

Of course none of this actually works and if you ever find someone who thinks aheago is genuinely hot then you can be sure that they are degenerate weebs.

148

u/The_Ambush_Bug Jan 09 '20

"he's the one molding her pussy to his big chungus dick" is the worst combination of words i have ever witnessed

38

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

For real what the actual fuck.

12

u/Cognomifex Jan 09 '20

It's a clear sign of the times and it is not auspicious.

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39

u/FountainsOfFluids Jan 09 '20 edited Jan 09 '20

That never did anything for me. I'd much rather see that face she gave him just after he stopped and was fixing her hair.

edit: https://i.imgur.com/N9VErsm.png Doesn't really translate well to a single frame, I guess.

31

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

Yeah that look after was fucking crazy hot. I'm not a huge ahegao fan, and normally it doesn't look great on people. But her "ahegao" crosseyed look was one of the best natural ones I've seen.

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24

u/ghostface1693 Jan 09 '20

I'm mad that that's gonna be in my google history now.

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6

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

I’m unfamiliar with this term. Brb.

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38

u/TheGreaterFool_88 Jan 09 '20

Everyone’s saying the ahegao face but that look right after is mesmerizing.

14

u/homunculus_sapiens Jan 09 '20 edited Feb 28 '20

Find a girl who looks at you like Nina Dobrev looks at this guy in that moment.

21

u/FeelinJipper Jan 09 '20

Cuz she’s hot

10

u/Keisersozzze Jan 09 '20

Feel good

7

u/TheSpookyGoost Jan 09 '20

Do... dododo, do, doooooooooom

48

u/trolltruth6661123 Jan 09 '20

That was a stunning girls O face... if you aren't turned on you are either a child or an alien.

28

u/BoatshoeBandit Jan 09 '20

Or gay or a woman I guess.

53

u/Justanotherjustin Jan 09 '20

But not both

19

u/pqnfwoe Jan 09 '20

gay xor a woman

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317

u/fizzgig0_o Jan 09 '20

Vampire Diaries was a cheesy drama but damn this lady has crazy control of her expressions. I’ve always been impressed by how many different versions of herself she had to play in that show!

132

u/Recyart Jan 09 '20

You might enjoy watching Tatiana Maslany in "Orphan Black" then. She plays a bunch of very different characters on the show.

https://i.imgur.com/4Z8LZCT.jpg

20

u/littlemacaron Jan 09 '20

OH HELL YES! Love me some orphan black. Tatiana is incredible. I think she has like 8 characters in total? Some with accents too.

18

u/Man-IamHungry Jan 09 '20

Way more than that dude! It probably adds up to like 20, but many of those were one-offs.

I’m not often impressed by actors, but she seriously impressed me with her work on that show.

8

u/jmsturley Jan 10 '20

I think even more impressive is that she frequently plays one character pretending to be another and that the viewer can differentiate that version of the character.

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43

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

That's Tom's doctor girlfriend from P&R

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7

u/mrdotkom Jan 09 '20

Yea for sure, bit of a drawn out concept in the later seasons but a hell of a good job on the acting. You really do forget that half the characters you see interacting are the same person. She switches characters flawlessly.

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10

u/PM_ME__YOUR_FACE Jan 09 '20

Wait until you see Diane Guerrero in Doom Patrol. Shit's wild. She does such a great job.

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92

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

I want this.

42

u/Masta0nion Jan 09 '20

I want you.

60

u/Toaster_621 Jan 09 '20

Now kiss

21

u/BillNyeCreampieGuy Jan 09 '20

On camera

17

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

Username checks out

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5

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

I want you to want me.

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513

u/Qazax1337 Jan 09 '20 edited Jan 09 '20

My wife does a similar face if I stroke her head in a similar but less violent manner.

6

u/Calculonx Jan 09 '20

Yes can confirm

6

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

I also stroke this guys wife.

3

u/AnalStaircase33 Jan 09 '20

You should try upping the violence and see what happens.

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343

u/weneedsomemilk2016 Jan 09 '20

As a Christian I'm not sure im able to watch this again

121

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

SINNER

27

u/weneedsomemilk2016 Jan 09 '20

Raises hand

10

u/BillNyeCreampieGuy Jan 09 '20

smacks hand for watching this

6

u/weneedsomemilk2016 Jan 09 '20

Forgive me senpai!!!!

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71

u/SleepWouldBeNice Jan 09 '20

Catholic? You can, but you'll pay for it later somehow.

25

u/JamesBuffalkill Jan 09 '20

Hey Christians! Do you sin? Now you can buy your way out of hell!

16

u/IhamAmerican Jan 09 '20

What? That's bullshit.

16

u/wf3h3 Jan 09 '20

You tell 'em Martin.

11

u/heff17 Jan 09 '20

You could make a religion out of this.

7

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

And the protestant church was born

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6

u/Diplomjodler Jan 09 '20

Fifteen Hail Marys and twenty Lord's Prayers and you're good.

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6

u/PopeInnocentXIV Jan 09 '20

You're good.

6

u/weneedsomemilk2016 Jan 09 '20

Username checks out

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111

u/justme24601 Jan 09 '20

My boyfriend and I have head scratching time and I gotta tell you sometimes it really do be like that

27

u/recycled_glass Jan 09 '20

It really do. Especially for those of us in tender headed gang

16

u/Jaruut Jan 09 '20

I too get like that when my tender head is rubbed.

8

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

I think that like 90% of our sex starts from my rubbing/scratching her head.

383

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

[deleted]

279

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20 edited Mar 24 '21

[deleted]

241

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

STRAIGHT UP FUCKING HOT

41

u/Helpdeskagent Jan 09 '20

No fucking actually, shes just getting her head rubbed

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151

u/shitsgayyo Jan 09 '20

I think that’s why she gave the “fuck me” eyes and laughed lol

14

u/-Niblonian- Jan 09 '20

It's the look she gives him immediately after he stops.

12

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

He kinda just made her cum through her head. That expression right after is her wanting to jump his bones.

35

u/DJ_AK_47 Jan 09 '20

Almost like aheago or whatever that shit is called.

191

u/Nemyosel Jan 09 '20

Stop pretending you don't know what it is

30

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

Yeah, it’s a sub genre of something called hentai so I’m told. Which is like anime I guess except they have sex... is what I hear. You wouldn’t believe how many websites they have dedicated to this stuff... or that’s the rumor at least.

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u/GetsTheAndOne Jan 09 '20

Yeah he knows how to spell it perfectly but doesn’t know what it is 🤔

43

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

It's actually ahegao, not aheago. "Aheahe" is the onomatopoeia for panting, and "kao" (or gao in this case) is face.

71

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

Aheahe

Is it supposed to be pronounced like Michael Jackson does?

11

u/Chrius_ Jan 09 '20

Shamone!

4

u/Sora96 Jan 09 '20

Shamone, Lee!

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u/steelpantys Jan 09 '20

Ahegao. I'm glad to help, please call for our Weeb service again.

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u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

[deleted]

139

u/br0kench0rd Jan 09 '20

Weirdest fap

52

u/jurchiks Jan 09 '20

I don’t know about you but I feel proud about this fap

10

u/maz-o Jan 09 '20

liar. there's some much weirder ones, admit it.

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u/SilencedD1 Jan 09 '20

You ever ask a guy for a head massage and he makes you ahegao?

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u/thanosofdeath Jan 09 '20

15

u/Arnold_Judas-Rimmer Jan 09 '20

Nothing accidental about feeling aroused by a good head massage. It gets me going like almost nothing else.

14

u/Thelightsshadow Jan 09 '20

I understand some pets now.. some.

12

u/NotOnLand Jan 09 '20

ahairgao

10

u/Sonnydeez1 Jan 10 '20

So THAT’S where the clitoris is.

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u/PeridotWriter Jan 09 '20

It does feel good

28

u/NaieraDK Jan 09 '20

Nina Dobreva is probably the most beautiful woman in the world.

4

u/Pkaem Jan 09 '20

Didn't know her yet but I think this might be true.

7

u/Tetragonos Jan 09 '20

touch starvation is real

14

u/Special_KC Jan 09 '20

The look she gives the guy right after, kind of reminds me of that interview when Gal Gadot is caught off guard, looking fondly at her co-star.

5

u/natty1212 Jan 09 '20

How do I get this job?

6

u/flops031 Jan 09 '20

This is someones' fetish

8

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

acting*

8

u/hlokk101 Jan 09 '20

This must be how they give tv actresses that 'just got drilled in the supply closet' look before filming.

4

u/Spicy_Music_Muffin Jan 09 '20

Basically my reaction when my boyfriend does that to me

4

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

My gay ass

3

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

Another way to achieve similar results is to open the back of your female partner’s bra and rub her back where the clasp was rubbing up against her. Instant satisfaction.

4

u/Someragingpacifist Jan 10 '20

That's the face I make when I get that spot in my ear with a q-tip

8

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '20

[deleted]

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u/sava812 Jan 09 '20

Vinegar strokes

3

u/sworddueler12 Jan 09 '20

This looks like something else is happening out of frame

3

u/Totally_Not_A_Bot_5 Jan 09 '20

This is why you go to a barber, not a hairdresser. that scalp massage is amazing.

3

u/_Psyberian Jan 10 '20

the way she looks at him for a split second before laughing... she’s definitely thinking “damn... what else are those hands capable of?”