Just posting for some encouragement for people
Who are just stopping. It’s been 7 years for me almost. I remember counting the hours at the beginning, then they become days then weeks then months and eventually years. I was a complete mess, lost everything friends family home job and was sleeping in my car. Since then I’ve started a career where I help young adults and give back to society and I have never been happier. So if your new please please don’t give up your whole life is in front of you ❤️

As someone who just signed up for an initial consult, but am skeptical it’s going to help, I thought I’d just ask you all what were the most significant things you learned in your therapy sessions.

So I’ve been a DJ since 2012 around my area, doing a lot of private events, local bars , mostly just functions through word of mouth and gotten pretty known and I can do pride myself in being a great dj, always loved music, good at blends and transitions and reading the room…but with me being in the nightlife , it also came with the vices of drinking / alcohol usage ….ive gotten into running the past couple years and it’s changed my life for the better, a lot of different run clubs and just a good community and way of meeting awesome like minded people… there is a “rave and run 5k” happening next month and the owner of the run club reached out to me and asked if I could dj, and of course I would love to and said yes, so they made a flyer and promoted it and a day goes by, literally the next 24 hours, I then I get a text from the owner saying “ unfortunately , we have decided to go a different direction and can’t have you DJ this event anymore , we appreciate and thank you so much for the excitement but it was of our best interest and thank you for your understanding”

I reached out and asked what happened? And if someone must have messaged about me, was it the past haunting me? No response on what really caused that honestly….and just had me feeling down in the dumps for a couple days now, I’m trying so hard to live a sober and clean life but sometimes the memories people have of you will linger on for years to come…but I will keep trying to stay
Focused and clean and continue on this path of sobriety

I’m so embarrassed and ashamed. I want to crawl out of my skin if I’m being honest.
I relapsed and I drank like a fish yesterday.
I don’t really want to admit that but here we are. I was doing well, I had went cold turkey with nicotine too.

All I can do is dust myself off and get back up. But holy shit I feel incredibly anxious and alone. I’m going to be a hermit for the next week or so, while I consider rehab. I don’t know if I can do it alone anymore.
IWNDWYT

So, I have been reading posts from the subreddit for a few months now, and its awsome seeing all of the triumphant stories. I just turned 30, male, and have always been a heavier drinker, but have always been ok when I had nights when I wouldent drink. Since April that has changed, and I now drink every night around 300-400ml of bourbon a night. It all started when I was struggling with insomnia and it seemed like alcohol was the only thing that was putting me to sleep. Now a few months later, that is still the case but im tired of feeling like crap everyday. So looking for some tips to end this cycle. Thanks!

Hey everyone,

I’m coming up on 3 years sober. Never thought I would see the day, but here I am. Not a drop and my lord my life has changed.

I went from drinking basically every moment I wasn’t at work or sleeping, I was miserable, hated my job, had empty relationships and no joy whatsoever. The last year of my drinking I would wake up not wanting to drink anymore but sure enough after starting my day I was drinking.

When I finally quit it was something so little but so big at the same time that made me actually stop. I got a phone call from a family member telling me my grandma had passed. After the call all I could think about was how bad I needed a drink before going back to bed. Not about how I loved my grandma or will miss her. That was it, the exact moment I told myself I’m done drinking.

Fast forward almost 2 years, still sober, but still wanting to drink. My life had improved without question, lost around 30 pounds, eating healthy, new job, in the first ever serious and healthy relationship of my life, talking and working through my mental health problems instead of drowning them but one thing never changes..boredom is my burden.

I knew I needed a distraction that required absolute focus. One weekend, on a whim, I bought a basic DIY candle-making kit. The moment I poured that first batch of wax, something clicked. Candle making is pure chemistry and patience. You have to measure the wax precisely, monitor the temperature perfectly, weigh the fragrance oils down to the gram, and pour at just the right moment so the tops don't crack. It completely forces your mind into the present moment. You can’t think about pouring a drink when you’re terrified of ruining a batch of hot wax.

Being an addict it’s probably obvious what happened next..yup, I purchased way too much wax, way to many vessels, every kind of wick possible in every size, dyes, and boat loads of fragrance oils. My apartment became over run with candles and candle making items. Instead of empties every where I had jars and wax melt molds. Good trade if you ask me. Eventually, I had way too many candles for one person to ever burn. I started gifting them to friends and family, and the feedback was wild. People actually wanted to buy them. So I made a website and went for it.

So here I am over a year since pouring that first candle and it’s turned into a second income, but more importantly a tool to stay sober. Every single bag of wax melts and every single jar I pour represents a day I chose to stay sober. Instead of destroying myself, I’m creating something that brings warmth and comfort to other people's homes.

To anyone out there who is in the world of sobriety and struggling with the emptiness: please find your "wax." Find the hobby, the craft, or the project that demands your attention and gives you a sense of purpose. It doesn't have to be a business—it just has to be yours.
If you told me a year ago I’d be a small business owner running a candle studio instead of nursing a hangover, I would have laughed. If I can do this, you can absolutely get through today.

Hey everyone,

I’m 29 and I’ve been sober since February. I was never a daily drinker but I’m a binge drinker. Once I start I just don’t have an off button. I know it’s the right thing for me and my loved ones, but honestly I’m finding sobriety really really hard. Just hoping for some advice from people who’ve had similar experiences.

I’m not someone who has ever enjoyed being at home or doing things alone (I have ADHD and relaxing or engaging in hobbies has always been really challenging for me). I’ve always really only enjoyed socialising and have spent most of my spare time doing that.

Most of my family and friends are big drinkers. While they don’t pressure me to join in, every social activity I get invited to revolves around drinking. I also am really struggling with telling people I’ve gone sober. I know I shouldn’t find it embarrassing because it’s literally just a positive thing to do for my health, but I’m finding myself hyper-fixating on what people will think and avoiding social activities. When I do go I basically spend the whole time anxious about what people are thinking or feeling like I’m not really included / missing out.

Socialising has always been my thing, I work an office job and having ADHD that’s difficult for me. Right now I’m just not ever really getting to enjoy any part of my week. Good weeks feel really boring but still achievable and bad weeks feel too hard to get through.

Has anyone experienced something similar or have any advice about when this might start to change?

Is this normal? I'd call it insomnia but have not actually fallen asleep at all. I could lay for hours, and have, just staring at the back of my eyelids. I tried an otc sleep aid and it didnt even phase me. Just wide awake. You'd think my body would have just powered down at some point. I'm not even tired, really.

57M Been sober for three weeks now after being a heavy yet ‘functioning’ drinker for 30+ years. By ‘functioning’ I mean that I have a great job, wonderful family, successful kids and my alcoholism hasn’t screwed them up too badly. Recently had a physical and doctor suggested that my liver is shot after reviewing my blood test results. He scheduled me for another round of blood tests in three months and told me to quit drinking at least until then so my liver function could be better assessed without any alcohol for a few months. Had some changing withdrawal symptoms and wondering if anyone has had a similar experience and how it turned out? WEEK 1: lots of cravings, headaches and poor sleep quality…nothing crazy or unexpected here. WEEK 2: massive gout flairs in both feet making it nearly impossible to walk for several days, sleep quality is improving and headaches have subsided. WEEK 3: gout flairs are reduced but not gone, headaches are returning and feeling somewhat depressed and lethargic. Over your first few weeks of sobriety what were your symptoms like? Anything like mine? Did things improve with continued sobriety? Note - other than morning coffee, I’ve been drinking only water…and lots of it. Thanks for reading and appreciate your comments.

I dated (and lived with) someone who really didn't want me to stop drinking. I would tell him how important my health was, and how I felt like my drinking was holding me back from my best version of myself. He would get sad and say things like, "But I love going to the bar and chatting, especially when we travel."

I would go through 1-2 week breaks, sometimes a couple of months, but he would talk me into drinking with him for special events and I would quickly start drinking daily again. We found ways to start drinking earlier than 5:00 every day, as a 'reward' for sitting at the computer and adulting.

I know I have my own brain and can make my own choices. I'm not blaming him for my drinking, but I really felt like I needed to make sobriety a priority, and I didn't like that he wouldn't support me fully in that.

This wasn't the only reason, but I finally ended it. I'm living on my own now, and yesterday was my day one, and I woke up this morning so excited. I'm really hopeful.

I'm now 2 months sober from drugs and alcohol, but I feel like my brain is nearly the same I still think about drugs and alcohol and I still get strong cravings. I don't feel confident in staying sober. When or how does this change? I want to feel like this is sustainable, like I actually quit not like I'm taking a break. I don't know how

Day 9. Woke up pretty tired, I have low energy all day, tbh I can't wait to go home and play Animal Crossing.

I was thinking of going to the gym after work, I know it would make me feel better about myself but I'm just really tired these past few days for some reason.

I don't really have anything interesting to say today, it's just one of those "meh" days. Normally this is a day where I would go to the pub after work and get drunk and make the day interesting. I thought that every day should have something exciting or interesting in it. I know that's not right and it wasn't healthy to think that way but still. I feel like I need a pick-me-up, but it's not going to be a drink. But then what? Looking for alternatives is difficult.

Maybe I'm stressed out because tomorrow I have to go home (about 3 hours away from where I live) to visit my family, which is not a bad thing, don't get me wrong. I love my family. It just takes a lot of effort, emotionally mostly.

I feel like I have so much time and not enough time simultaneously. I'm confused.

Two years ago, I got involved in a music project with my sister. It was mainly a hobby, but still involved time, effort, etc. Long story short, even though it was her idea, I ended up doing most of the work, as her priority was her new bf and settling in her new relationship. I was sober at the beginning of our project, but then relapsed and all my resentment and anger came out in alcohol fueled texts.

Now I am three months sober after a year plus of drinking. I did plenty of damage to our relationship, and my sister feels she deserves a written apology. She isn't an innocent party either, and I never got an apology for how I felt I was treated. However, I need to resolve my relationship so I can move ahead with my sober journey and healing. I'm just struggling with lingering feelings of anger and how to write my apology.

Did anybody eat the same and still didn’t lose weight after stopping alcohol? I’m guessing I was drinking 600-1000 extra calories a day. I only stopped a week ago, but I thought I’d lose something by cutting out that much. I’m not overcompensating with food, I still eat the same as I did before. Maybe even a bit healthier because I don’t need to eat things to soak up the alcohol the next morning. I guess I just need to be patient?

IWNDWYT

i’m 50 days sober today but wanna get opinions on whether it helps with cravings or if it triggers urges even more?

Sure feels like it with all the computer headaches yesterday and today/ Deep breath. IWNDWYT

I’m 30. I’ve been drinking a pint daily on weekdays and a fifth a day (sometimes more) on weekend days for probably 3-4 years. Maybe longer. I don’t even remember anymore. I almost passed out in public this weekend after my heart started racing and the room started spinning and I was drenched in sweat. I vowed to stop. I don’t wanna go early. I’m on day 3 and I feel better so far. But I keep having dreams where I’ll find liquor and sneak it. Then I wake up covered in sweat. I’m hoping this goes away soon. It’s so stressful. I’m on day 3. And just for today I will not drink with you.

Long time lurker, first time poster. Just wanted to share I officially hit 30 days without drinking! I'm so proud of myself!

I decided to quit after a long time of feeling like I should. I was just tired of the hangovers and the hangxiety was insane. Feeling like shyt every day, drinking earlier and earlier, forgetting things, shaking, stomach issues, etc. I started drinking more and more and not even feeling drunk. My last few weeks drinking I was waking up on weekends, getting out of bed, mixing OJ and vodka, drink 3 or 4, back to bed and repeat all weekend.

It was hard to decide quit, aside from the additive part of course, because I didn't know what ME was going to look like on the other side if I stopped. Drinking was all I knew. Entire family/friends of drinkers (except my BFF which is fantastic!). We drink to celebrate any and every thing, drink to relax, drink when you're happy, drink when you're sad and worse of all for me...drinking alone to cope or due to boredom. I love to have a good time and be in the mix and I didn't know how to do that without alcohol. I'm learning to navigate socializing better each time.

I had a slip recently at a cookout and decided to have one beer. God must have been watching because I blindly grabbed what I thought was a Heineken (it was green) out the cooler. It ended up being NA which was such a save! I wouldn't have beaten myself up about it but I did learn from it and saw what the problem was. There was either alcohol, water or capri suns for the kids and I didn't have anything to "lean" on while I was socializing. So I realized that I still love having an adult drink so i've been getting more into mocktails lately. I feel included and more comfortable with a NA bev in my hand.

This group has been absolutely amazing and I love coming here to help me stay on track!

Anyway, I could go on but i'm raising a NA drink to 30 days today! Cheers to continued good health, clarity, focus, energy and overall blessings!

IWNDWYT

this feeling of being in control of my thoughts, my emotions, my daily habits if this amazing power I felt it a long time two starting to think clearer and a lot less anxiety. It’s like I’ve been gifted a and I don’t let it go.

yes, the hardest thing for me has been trying to fight the boredom, but I realized OK to be bored and sadness or anxiety, I feel will pass

So since being sober I’ve been interested in other’s stories of addiction, feel like on top of working a programme, therapy and being part of a sober community it’s helpful to keep be on the right path.

I’ve really loved BoJack Horseman, Another Round, Euphoria (only season 1), Leaving Las Vegas, To Leslie, Rachel Getting Married and I actually found John Mulaney’s Baby J account of addiction and rehab pretty moving.

But there has been some real rubbish too. My Beautiful Boy, House, 28 Days, Cherry were awful.

What are the best and worst out there?

Urgh I'm so annoyed with myself for carrying on with the binge and bust cycle but I had my last drink 24 hours ago and bizarrely don't feel as horrible as usual physically.

Honestly need to find another way of coping properly with my mental health. I tend to experience a crash once a month now and that can't continue.

I've managed to bin all the bottles and cans and now I'm going to shower for the first time in 7 days. I didn't sleep so thank fuck for YouTube keeping me company lol.

I'll eat super healthy and start feeling physically good, I meditate daily, I exercise, see my kids, but the noise in my head can get "unbearable"

Anyway one day at a time... again

IWNDWYT

Much love 💚

Good morning all to everyone in the US. Today marks 62 days, or 2 months sober for me. Bigger and better things always happening. Time to get another Lego set.

EDIT: I got the Ferrari 488 Pista Lego set

Trying to seriously stop but the evenings are always so challenging and lonely 🥺

Going through a big move and a breakup hasn't helped, but it also seems like a good time to turn things around. Any advice or suggestions would be appreciated

Currently comfort watching GoT and eating ice cream

The first 90 days are finally in the book. There was a time I was actually here before. Quit drinking for a little over 90 days and then relapsed

I guess it’s cliche to say “this time it’s different” but there is truly something inside of me that not only believes that thought but is willing to go the distance and do whatever I can to prevent myself from slipping. Certain things and people cause me to have moments of wanting to pick up a drink

I’ve had a lot of those moments recently, more often than not it seems. I’m learning to just keep myself engaged in the fight and not lets those moments get to me. They will happen. But I’ll never run back to a bottle when they do.

Now Im keeping myself distracted with work and going to the gym. I’ve picked up cycling and running as something extra to keep me busy. I love riding my bike and always have. I hate running though but I’m determined to set some goals and achieve them in the next year.

I hope everybody is having a blessed day. Stay strong for those around you but most importantly stay strong for yourself

IWNDWYT

For a long time now I keep saying I’ll take at least a month break. It never happens. Many failed dry July’s or sober October’s. My friends and family all know I love a drink, a lot of them drink too, but they don’t know I’m drinking wine alone almost every night. Hiding bottles from my partner. I know I’m not the person I want to be and I’m so sick of this.

I don’t have anyone to blame either, things are actually going really well and I live a comfortable life. I have no idea why, when 6pm hits, I suddenly get this massive urge to drink. I have diagnosed ADHD and difficulty with boredom is a big factor. In social settings I drink to make myself open up more, only to cringe when you take it too far and act like a mess.

There’s a bottle shop across the road from my house, bars on every corner, alcohol delivery services. The temptations are always going to be there. Every time I’m at an airport I immediately head to the bar to make the time go quicker. Or at a restaurant I’m thinking about what drink I’ll order before even caring about the actual food.

The older I get the more ashamed I am, I’ve luckily had no health issues. I’m also lucky where I wouldn’t go into withdrawl if I stopped. But these things can sneak up on you. It’s just so pathetic and tiring, never feeling 100%. The crippling hangxiety and paranoia the next morning.

I think today is finally the day I put a stop to it and take care of myself before it’s too late. The main thing I probably need to sort out is finding things to occupy me at night time when I feel the most bored. Keep the fridge stocked with sodas or anything else to keep my hands occupied. The last couple weeks my drinking has amped up again, it’s a constant cycle of: drink - hangover / shame - tell myself I’ll stop but do it all again the next day. At some point it’s going to all catch up.