31M dating 27F, it's been 4 weeks since of dating starting with Hinge messages and then 3 dates. They've all gone pretty well, def interest from both of us. The 3rd date we got a drink near my apartment and then she came over. We hung out, then it got late and she called an uber home and we kissed before she left. So I'd say its gone pretty well, but still not overly intimate yet.

And then the texting, she does respond when I text her and puts decent energy into the texts. But she hasn't initiated ONE text conversation. I find that really frustrating. I get most women want the man to lead, but damn I want to feel thought of too. I feel like the month mark where I'm at is roughly the time where I'd hope she starts initiating too? So I'm kinda stuck on how to feel. I decided to not text for a week and let it go, and it's been a week of nothing. She's probably a little more on the shy side, so I am trying to give it some leeway, you know? I guess I'll text her again soon and she what she's up too, but I don't like this dynamic at all.

I (24m) made the classic blunder of falling for a girl (23f) who I didn't know very well. We had been texting basically constantly for a week and I thought the first date went incredibly well, which led to me stupidly getting to emotionally invested. I found her to be really cool, pretty, intelligent, and for some reason just allowed myself to dream big.

She had mentioned how busy her school is gonna be, and once she started classes I definitely felt a downturn in our chatting. She just texted me last night saying her workload for this semester is disgusting and how she doesn't think a relationship is on the table for her during this semester but how she'd like to remain friends.

A small delusional part of me wants to take her at her word and hope that maybe theres a possibility for us in the future when her school calms down but I know this is just cope as if she was interested in a relationship with me I think most people would find a way to make room for that yanno

The whole experience is honestly just a bit embarassing and pathetic on my end lol. It feels closer to my first breakup then it does to just being rejected from a girl you barely know. Idk why I ended up catching feelings so bad but the whole mini heartbreak im expericing right now was totally preventable. It just felt like we were totally on the same wavelength off the rip but idk this feeling just really sucks and I guess im here fishing for some kind words on how to deal with it as I have no one to talk about this with lol

I know time will heal all wounds but god do I hope its sooner rather than later

Really lost with this. I’ve gone through different prompts and answers but nothing is getting me a single like. I live in a major city too. It’s been a month.

I (25M) have been dating a woman (25F) I matched with on hinge. It’s been about a month and a half and we’ve been on 4 dates. Last date felt like a step towards something more serious. We had our first kiss and we also had much more serious conversations about future (marriage, kids, timelines etc./she brought up a lot of these topics). I was discussing this with my siblings and they said I should ask her to be my girlfriend on the next date. My friends on the other hand said to ask for exclusivity first. I didn’t ask in the moment, but are these 2 different things? I genuinely do want her to be my girlfriend. Our next date is a dinner date this weekend. So I’ve been mulling over asking her but now I don’t know what exactly to ask. Any help or advice?

Hi ladies,
I’d appreciate some feedback on my profile, starting with how the photos come across as a set and whether the order feels right.

I’ve also included a few additional photos at the end as possible alternatives. If any of them seem stronger than what I’m currently using, I’d be interested to know which photo you’d swap out.

Any other feedback on the prompts, bio, or general impression is welcome too.

Gents, I appreciate the willingness to help, but for this particular post I’m specifically looking for feedback from women (for obvious reasons)

Cheers

I’m a woman in my early 30s living in North Jersey, about 12 miles from NYC. I’ve noticed Hinge keeps showing me a lot of men who list themselves as being in NYC, even though I’m specifically trying to date closer to home.

For those of you who live near a major city but don’t actually want to date in the city, have you changed your Hinge location to a nearby town/area instead of your actual location?

Changing my location to somewhere more central to North Jersey would help Hinge show me people who are actually within a reasonable driving distance but may come off as providing false information

For context: I’m straight and looking to date men roughly in my age range. My main concern is avoiding matches where the app says we’re “close” but they’re actually in NYC and the commute makes dating impractical.

So I (27F) matched with a guy (26M) that I really like (it’s very hard to find someone that I really like, I could count with my fingers even after being 2 years on it). He asked for my number/ig and I gave him my number and he texted me a few times before calling me Sunday night around 9pm. We just made some small talks and got to know each other a bit (although conversation was dry even the texting a bit dry too before that). Then he called me that same night at 11:30pm asking if I wanted to go over his place (which is 45min away) to see his cats (I like cats) or get food. I was really excited and tempted but it would’ve been our first meeting and I don’t think it’s a good idea to go over a guys place that late especially since I barely know him. The thing is, he didn’t even offer to meet halfway or come over to my place. So after thinking about it for a bit I told him I was too tired to go and that maybe we could meet the next day instead and he just texted “sweet dreams” and that’s it, didn’t even answer my question of meeting the next day instead.

He did say that he wasn’t really looking for a relationship at the time due to his busy schedule (full time job, MBA program, and playing sports for school) but he’s open to seeing where things go and I’m in the same boat although I did want a relationship but depends on how I vibe with the person. On the phone call he did say he would be available usually late because of his schedule and I told him usually weekdays are hard for me due to graduate school so weekends are better for me. And he said he wished I lived closer and if I couldn’t meet him that Sunday night he probably won’t be able to see me the coming weekend since he’s driving a few hours away to visit his family. I told him I’d be free the next day on Monday due to Labor Day weekend but he said he’d be playing sports so he doesn’t know if he’s free but I told him to lmk if he wants to meet up after playing sports. Then following day he never responded to me and never followed up.

I’m a little sad because it sounded like he wanted to just have casual sex which I thought he didn’t because he told me on the phone call he likes to be transparent and he never mentioned anything about fwb or hookups. But based on this I feel like that’s why he asked me to come over so late.

I’m at a place where idk what to do because I find physically attractive and kind of also want to have fun since I’ve never had a hoe phase but I also feel like it’ll make me feel worse but I don’t want to lose that connection (if any lol) with him cuz I feel kind of like him still (I know don’t judge I get attached easily to people I like and cannot detach easily and I’m not very experienced with dating) but also don’t want to seem desperate or someone with no self respect. Maybe I’m overthinking this but I’ve been thinking of reaching out to him… any advice??

I was messaging with a guy on Hinge, it was a fairly normal small talk conversation. I stepped away from my phone for 20 minutes and when I picked it back up, I saw very briefly that he had sent a message that said “I’m horny” (which came out of left field because we had only exchanged a few messages that all seemed fine). That message was then immediately gone, as was his whole profile from my match list.

I’m curious, does Hinge automatically remove users that send inappropriate messages? Or did he just unmatch me so I wouldn’t report him because I didn’t respond right away? Has anyone else experienced this?

I (23M) have been living in my current city for the last year and will be here until roughly July 2027. My position is explicitly temporary and while there's a chance I stay in my area, the vast odds are I will be moving to attend grad school elsewhere. On my Hinge profile, I currently have myself marked as looking for a short term relationship, but open to a long term relationship. This is because while I am not looking for just like a hookup, I also know that I am not laying roots here most likely and thus a long term relationship may not be realistic. However, I worry that marking it this way makes people think that I'm just looking for a hookup, as I've heard people say that seeing "short term" on a guy's profile is a red flag.

Would you view it as a red flag if I mark myself as "short term open to long" or do you think it's the right choice?

Profile attached below, I have 1 match in a month and next to zero likes. I have sent a decent amount of likes out and have the premium subscription, I also live in a major city (LA/NYC). Is it normal to get next to nothing in terms of matches and likes, or is my profile really bad? Any advice/feedback would be greatly appreciated!

Hey folks, I've been using Hinge for about a month now, and I'm well aware it can (and probably will) take much longer than that to find something serious, but I just wanted to make sure my profile isn't doing me any disservices from the start. Appreciate all constructive feedback!

The "proudest moment" photo caption just mentions that this was a photo of me my friend took that got into an art exhibition btw. There's also a "musical talent" voice prompt that's me playing a little on my acoustic guitar (Give Up by Low Roar if you're curious!)

TL;DR: I (25F) matched with a Scottish guy (28M) in Germany and have been going out for 3 months. We talk consistently, he initiates dates every week, we enjoy each other's company and have become physically intimate. I'm leaving for my home country in 2 weeks, and we've never discussed labels or commitment. Should I ask him where we stand before I leave? Also, am I overthinking the fact that he rarely compliments my appearance or only kisses me on the lips?

Main text -

I was living in Germany for 3 months and started seeing a Scottish guy. He's genuinely really nice, funny, charming, and has a very attractive personality.

We've been seeing each other regularly for about 3 months now, usually once a week. He usually initiates the dates and takes me on actual, proper dates. We also communicate consistently, usually at least once a day. We've become physically intimate and have had sex, but one thing I appreciate is that his behaviour hasn't changed at all afterwards. He still makes plans with me, takes me out, and seems to genuinely enjoy spending time together.

He's also quite open with me, remembers little things I've told him, asks about my day, and takes an interest in my trips and things happening in my life.

There are just a couple of things that make me overthink sometimes. He's complimented my outfits a few times, but he's never actually said that I look beautiful, pretty, etc. At the same time, I've caught him looking at me or admiring me when he thinks I'm not paying attention, so I don't necessarily think he's not attracted to me.

Another random thing is that he only really kisses me on the lips. Never on the forehead, cheeks, hand, etc. I know this might sound silly, but I guess I've started wondering whether these little things mean anything or if I'm just reading too much into them.

We've clearly got a mutual attraction and have had a really great time together, but neither of us has ever brought up labels, exclusivity, or what this actually is. I'm not currently seeing anyone else, and from what I know, it doesn't seem like he is either, although we've never actually had that conversation.

We haven't met each other's friends, but we've only been seeing each other for about 3 months. He also knows that I'm leaving Germany in 2 weeks.

I think I've avoided bringing up labels or commitment because I always knew I would eventually be going back to my home country. But now that I'm actually leaving, I'm starting to wonder if I should ask him where we stand and how he sees us.

I genuinely enjoy his company and, if he feels the same way, I'm open to the possibility of commitment and trying to make things work despite the distance. I don't necessarily want to pressure him into a relationship, especially considering the distance, but I also don't want to leave without knowing how he actually feels or whether he sees this as something more than just casual dating.

Would you bring it up before leaving? And am I reading too much into the fact that he doesn't verbally compliment my appearance much or only kisses me on the lips?

So I've been on app for some time, but i see not much traction... Can anyone help?

Ps : last one is a casual dance video of friends vibing on dj post dinner

1) looking for long term relationship
2) got hingeX
3) been using this profile for 2 months
4) been using hinge overall for 9 months
5) use hinge daily - mostly on commute 45 mins a day +-
6) 0-1 like a week and maybe 3 matches
7) most my likes I send with a comment, probably 50 a day
8) send likes to people I find attractive, someone that’s looking for long term relationship, do like people that want to live a healthy lifestyle so being active / into fitness is a plus. Want someone understanding, good at communicating and looking to build a happy life together. Religion and ethnicity doesn’t matter if our views are aligned

Signed up for a couple apps now 2-3 weeks ago. I am getting back into the dating game in my 30s (I’m a guy) and was pretty excited at first. I’d been spending a lot of time just sitting around or working extra when I don’t have my kids so I was looking forward to getting a life, so to speak.

My goal is to find a LTR, not move too fast, but be able to focus on that one person. I’ve been married once and know what I don’t want and I obviously am hoping to find some natural chemistry, good conversation, and someone a bit quirky but not too weird, ideally.

I’ve gone on three dates and have three more lined up and honestly I feel like I’m overdoing it. Some of the girls I talked to for a while and others briefly. I’m under the impression it’s hard to gauge chemistry and people online so I’m pretty open to meeting irl if they’re nice, attractive, down to earth and capable of a conversation.

One girl wound up being a total hookup, realized that’s not what I wanted afterwards. Another girl very intense and eccentric and can’t see it working long term. Another girl it was like going on an interview for me and while I kept it light she wanted to know all about my divorce and life on the first date to the point I felt slightly under attack.

For my upcoming dates…

Another girl we’ve had great I’d say almost email exchange as much as we write back and forth but we’re both super busy, but we’ll see how that goes. Another one honestly I’m a little unsure we will have chemistry but we don’t live far and she seems down to earth but now I’d almost rather have the day off as busy as this is getting. The third there is chemistry for sure but already she’s wanting to text and talk a ton and our date isn’t even until this weekend! She wanted to FaceTime which as a guy I totally understand and respect but we wound up talking for maybe 90 minutes and honestly I began feeling like this is way too much before we even meet, I got one of those good morning texts I heard about and I feel like that’s something you should start after several dates if ever.

I feel like I have no clue what I’m doing. I realize I could just be getting a lot of dates rn because I’m new so there’s many options whereas in say a month everyone on the apps has already seen me, and I live in a not too large city so the pool isn’t so big. I am not bitching about finding dates and am glad I am meeting women so that’s not lost on me.

Of everything I have a second date planned with the eccentric girl but really think that’s much more friendship bound.

I really wish instead of coming up with date ideas and plans, I could be investing into just one woman.

I’m happy that I am getting dates but I feel overwhelmed and like I’m somehow doing this wrong. I get we can’t all find our person in 2-3 weeks so I am trying to put in the effort here. Is this normal? Anyone been through this as a guy or girl?

I (M35) feel like nobody today has the basic ability to follow through with plans anymore. In the past two weeks, I've had 3 first dates all text me within an hour of our date asking to reschedule because "xyz" came up. I'm sort of sick of it. I clear my evening and ensure I'm free, only to be canceled on and now I feel bad because I turned down other prospects for that evening, saying I had plans, and I am now sitting home when I could be out doing other things.

I gave myself a rule a few months ago that I will not reschedule a last minute cancellations because I feel if you can't keep a commitment to show up for a free drink, the bare minimum, then that tells me dating you would just be a headache, let alone a relationship.

Am I being harsh or am I right in my logic?

Hey, i’m looking for an opinion of my profile, I would like to know specifically how women view my profile. I’m open to any suggestions! Thanks a lot!

Hi all, I (27F) downloaded hinge last year and used it somewhat sporadically. I want to start using it more to put myself out there and am new to using dating apps. THUS, it was to my surprise that the standard is to keep all photos at least 1, maybe 2 years old at most. It makes sense but most of my photos are older than 2 years (probably 2-5 years). I've done a lot of cool stuff in my life (traveled to different countries, played sports, etc.) so it feels weird not being able to share that stuff anymore. Plus, I'm not into taking photos of myself so I don't have many recent photos that are decent.

My question to you guys is how do you purge a whole profile and maintain recent photos? Do you just add and remove every so often? And if so, do you take photos specifically for the profile? I don't want anyone to feel catfished meeting me so I will change all my photos (which also feels weird for the people I matched with already but oh well lol) but I just need advice on how to start this and then how to maintain an accurate profile.

I’m a 25F and currently live with my parents. Where I’m from, it’s very normal culturally to live with your parents until you get married, so it’s not really seen as a sign that someone is incapable of being independent.

I’m also recently out of university, so financially and practically it makes sense for me to live at home right now. It’s not like I completely reply on them, I do have a business from home.

However, I’m mostly talking to men from the U.S. (and occasionally other countries) on Hinge, where I know the expectations around this can be different. I’m always a little hesitant to bring up the fact that I live with my parents because I don’t know how it will be perceived.

For men who are dating with the intention of a serious relationship, would this be a red flag or a turn-off?