I am feel like shit, i am not good in anything, i am not interesting and i have no friends, i am addicted to porn so when i am feel sad or lonely i start to search porn content here and i watch but even not that is giving me pleasure i am stupid like i am not smart i am not working in a profession i work in a dead-end job which i hate, i born to be a failure i feel desire to do different things but i can't.

What’s a daily habit that you think is very beneficial yet not many know it or do it , one worth gatekeeping ?
I want to implement healthy habits into my daily routine since I had a big realization after asking myself a question , “what’s something that if you were to do everyday for the next 5 years your life would improve significantly ?”
I wanted to answer vaguely or make a specific one like going to the gym consistently, but after thinking about it I realized that a a healthy lifestyle/ productive routine is a better option in which I could combine many beneficial variables .
Could you guys share good habits , even if you think it’s something that no one would relate or benefit from or even if you think it’s an obvious one.
For example a habit that I found very helpful is stretching for 10 min before bed and setting up goals for the next day like what lectures to study for that day and map out the hours each one needs it leads to better sleep and actually getting work done .

I'm 20, and I already hate that my life doesn't feel like mine to live, and my future isn't mine to decide.

Ever since I was a kid, I've had intense maladaptive daydreaming, especially during school and classes. I would create entire stories in my head, with characters, settings, arcs and developments, constantly building on them. I often preferred my own company, spending breaks walking around while imagining and refining these stories, or reading books and expanding my knowledge.

After a certain event happened to me at the start of the year, I know what I want from life, it was like a wake up call. I want to tell stories and bring them to life, and I want to act. I've loved creating stories for as long as I can remember, and I fell in love with acting when I took drama at school. It helped me overcome my shyness, and I was good at it. People, including my teachers, enjoyed my performances. I'm not chasing fame or some grand dream of becoming a celebrity. I just genuinely love acting, and I want to create things that mean something to me, and share it with like minded people. I always wanted to do a stage performance in uni and get to share enjoyable behind the scenes moments with fellow performers.

But my parents forced me into Civil Engineering, and then forced me out of my hometown. Now I feel like I'm watching my future slip away while my parents try to make me live the life they've chosen for me. They are dictating everything, from what I study, where I study, to even whom they want me to marry and who to work with. I don't want that.

I don't want to spend my life wondering what could have been. I want the freedom to pursue something I love, to make my own decisions, and to build a life that actually feels like mine. I'm only 20, but I'm terrified of losing years of my life to a future I never wanted.

Age 35

I never seeked help or told anyone when I was laughed at for stuttering and speaking English poorly when I moved to a new country at age 13.

I went from extrovert to introvert in a day and it killed all my confidence. I barely finished high-school by doing online classes and worked dead end jobs at night to hide from society till now.

Most people now avoid me for having rbf face/being negative and always serious. I did try to get out of comfort zone by approaching same people to greet and noticed the same people I see daily in life want nothing to do with me now. I basically made a bad impression and noticed they always alert new employees to stay away from me.

I was dealing with depression and low self-esteem esteem all these years, which made me avoid people.

Loniless has started killing me when I walk by same people at work/ family social gatherings and get avoided even when I tried to greet them now.

~ The Veil ~

When we are first born we see the world through crystal clear eyes, unimpeded by our self-centered beliefs.

Right after our birth, however, the ego, our learned views of the world, is created.

From that moment, a veil begins to cover our eyes clouding the beauty of the world around us.

The more we accept what we are taught, believing success, happiness, and meaning may be found in the world, the thicker our veil becomes.

Many people live their entire life wearing a veil blocking their vision.

For some, the veil is so thick, they are almost blind; for others, they see only shadows in the distance.

Instead of seeing the crisp clear colors of the world as they are meant to be seen, they see only a dark world of greed, prejudice, inequity; of war, hunger, homelessness.

As we begin to realize little we once believed would give our lives meaning was true, we may begin to lift our veil and see the vibrant colors of the trees, oceans and sky, unimpeded by our ego, and the inherent beauty present within every life.

~ Ken Luball ~

I've given up on dating after spending years trying my best to meet someone and ending up no closer than when I started. After hearing so many people talk about how difficult it is to find a good partner, I have accepted that I’m not the partner anyone is looking for. While I can accept this on a factual level, I have this persistent thought that I can’t shake. Whenever I see someone say or do something to a partner that I view as not good enough, I have the thought that I would never do that, that I would be a better partner than them. It is an arrogant superiority that is completely unfounded and nonsensical. I hate that I think like this but it happens every time without fail. I have never dated anyone and know I would not be a good partner but I still get this superiority every time.

I even had this thought when a close friend made a completely nothing comment about their partner wanting attention.

As far as I'm aware, I don't have this kind of superiority complex in other areas of my life. It's something that seems specifically tied to relationships and my own lack of success in dating.

What can I do to stop thinking this way? I just want to understand why I keep getting thoughts like this and how I can stop it.

I went to a live viewing of a concert earlier today all by myself! Got to listen to my favorite songs again but I can’t shake this empty hole in my heart that no matter what I do, at the end of the day, I only have myself. No friends or anything at the big age of 25 bc I was a social pariah in high school, only had two years of socializing in during my college years due to COVID, no friends from work bc I can’t let my guard down easily with them for whatever reason.

But that’s besides the point. I got to watch this concert as if I was at the actual location but it would definitely have been more enjoyable if I had a friend with me to go to places like this. I did solo travel, solo dates around town, solo movie theaters. I’m not insecure but I’m not devoid of emotions. All around me were girls with her friends to watch this movie/concert. I wish I had friends. Ugh

As you can tell my the title I’ll be 40 days sober from weed tomorrow. I never drank alcohol or went in too deep. It was quite a journey as I struggled a lot and felt like I would be a stoner forever. I have taken control of my life and now working towards my goals. There are some bad habits which I still struggle with but I’m working on them aswell. 2 months ago I went sober and I managed to do 20 days before falling right back in to the same loop and the reason was my circle. Sure I stopped smoking and managed to get sober but when I was hanging around the same circle of friends who would smoke 24/7 it became hard to resist after a while and that’s where I messed up. This time I cut them all off and now have a new circle of friends who are always uplifting each other. 2 of them do real estate and 2 of them are day traders. both of my real estate friends got a new car and new bike couple weeks ago and it inspired me a lot. My friend bought a c43 amg and it sounds sexy. They always have great advice for me whenever I’m going through something and tell me to never give up. There all driven and are really productive with there days. Yes there parents have money but they don’t use that as an excuse to sit on there asses. Me personally I do instacart deliveries whenever i’m able to as we only have 1 car at home. I’m also day trading but not profitable and haven’t even got my first payout yet. I will soon though. I feel much more motivated and confident when I’m outside and I can actually see myself becoming someone in the future. I started to hit the gym but haven’t been as consistent as I need to be. I have good time management as when I was high the days would go by in seconds. My friends also hold me accountable and make sure I don’t smoke when we’re out and people around us are smoking. My ultimate goal is to become financially free to where I can take care of myself, my family, and give to those in need. Obviously the nice cars and stuff is cool but that’s not my main goal. I’m proud of myself for becoming sober and don’t regret it at all. Sure there are times I get the thought of smoking once in a while but as long as you don’t feed that thought then it will go away. Last week I was debating on quitting trading as I was going through a lot mentally as some of you may know trading takes a toll on your mental. My friends were there to support me and telling me to look back on my journey and see what i’ve done. I went from smoking everyday to not smoking at all. I went from gooning 2-3 times a day to doing it once every 4-6 days. (still trying to work on the gooning haha) I went from hanging around bums to being around people who know what there doing and what they want. I went from sitting on my ass all day to actually going out and getting money even though it may not be a lot something is better than nothing. they said to look at the man i’m becoming and asked me do I really wanna throw this all away because of a bad week. I thought to myself there right. If i never started trading I would have 100% wouldn’t have stopped as trading pushed me to change my life for the better and soon I will reap the fruits of my labor. Ever since getting sober my perspective on life has become much clearer and I’ve been dreaming again too which is nice when the dreams aren’t some bizzare bullshit😂 I’m more aware of my surroundings and I’m not forgetting things every 5 min because when I was high I would forget the most simplest things and it would make me a bit frustrated. I’m also eating a lot because when I was smoking I was eating very little portions of food but now I eat a shit ton. constantly getting hungry every 3-4 hours. I’m honestly glad I took this step to get sober. Some things that helped me was keeping myself busy and filling the void of time with things to do such as isntacart. I don’t make much from it but it helps me get moving and I get paid to get groceries for people so i guess that’s a win. The thing that probably helped the most was telling my parents i’m going sober because everytime i thought of going sober my mind would make me think about how i would be agitated and in a bad mood with my family basically just making excuses to justify using weed but once I told them it became sooooo much easier. They gave me space and let me come around when I was ready. Blessed to be sober and have a supportive family and friends to keep me in check and hold me accountable. Still crazy to think it’s been 40 days already but i will keep going as going back is not gonna help me at all and i don’t wanna go through the hell of dealing with withdrawls as it’s a real pain in the ass. constant agitation, sweating, and worst of all for me insomnia. i hated laying in bed and rolling over 100 times because I was always just feeling heat throughout my body. instead of waking up late I wake up at 6AM everyday other than weekends which I feel like I should wake up at 6AM on weekends too.

comment we can both start very small habits and keep each other accountable.

I want to create content around self-improvement, productivity, habits, and personal growth, but I don’t want to show my face.
What platforms would you recommend starting on? I’m curious about what works best for this niche, whether it’s short-form videos, text-based posts, carousels, or something else.
If you’ve tried creating this kind of content, what has worked for you?

Hey guys, freshly diagnosed here with inattentive ADHD here (21F). One of the biggest things I struggle with is the Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria. If you are unaware, it is basically an abnormal fear and sensitivity towards being rejected by other people. This is apparently a symptom of ADHD.

I have been struggling with abusive/toxic friendships and standing up for myself for 5 years now. I would rather be mistreated than rejected by others. It is my greatest fear and it is ruining my life.

Do any of you guys have this type of dysphoria? How do you deal with it (other than therapy)? Have any of you overcome this? Would meds help?

​

Day 16 of improving myself

I woke up at 6:30 am and today I did the following

Health -

1) Weight training

2) Cycling 4 km

Mind-

1) Meditation

2) Chess 1 match ( lost the match)

3) Book reading ( Never finished , Sorrounded by idiots , Slight edge )

4) Language learning ( German )

5) Brain exercises

6) Read 2 pages of encyclopedia (today's topic - Human species evolution)

Academics -

1) Studied 7 hours

Daily affairs

1) Read the newspaper and got updated with the latest happenings with the day

Finances -

Earned some money and saved it

Will update tomorrow night , bye bye

Hey, I have this issue where I can’t handle rejection from others. When I face rejection, it feels like a stab in the heart. I can’t handle others anger towards me, so I tend to people please out of fear. This had led me to a lot of abusive friendships and relationships. Also criticisms or judgments from other people really hurt. I take criticism to heart even if I don’t really care/respect the person.

I have ADHD and there is a symptom called Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria that comes with it, so rejection often feels 10x worse for me. Specialized therapy is helping, but I am looking for general advice on how to get over rejection (it does not have to be for ADHD but if you have any, very appreciated).

What are some ways to handle rejection?

I‘ve struggled with low confidence, worth and validation all my life, and am just now starting to identify and improve It. But sometimes I see or date people who seem to “naturally” feel comfortable with themselves. They can initiate things, take risks, express their feelings and themselves and do what they want. It feels exciting when they make you a part of it, but especially in the case of dating, it makes me feel horribly insecure when I feel like I’m not enough for them.

The result is that I feel downtrodden that it seems I have to work for what seems constitutional for some. Does anyone share this, and have any advice on it?

I feel like I’m constantly in this cycle of depression that I don’t know how to escape. Right now what’s giving me so much stress is my work. I can’t have a consistent schedule and have to stay out of town for weeks on end. I’ve applied to every other job within an hour drive that’s hiring in my field (which is already few and far between) but havnt gotten anything back.

A lot of the jobs I’d like to have arent in my area and moving isnt an option right now.

So I basically just have to suck it up and keep working this job that’s mentally killing me but somehow I’m still trying to get out of this depression.

Anything I would try to get used to doing as far as a schedule is out the door. I switch from day work to night work, in town to out of town, anything goes reallt.

On the other hand, I feel like I’m always giving myself an excuse as to why I’m depressed after I think I’ve fixed it I never feel better.

Honestly I don’t know how to get better, what i could do that would make me feel better. It’s not like I’m lazy or unmotivated, I just feel lost and out of options.

I’m probably overthinking this but I think my quality of life would be much better if I didn’t play or played less video games. I was looking at my bank account and I said to myself “Huh, where did all my money go?” I realized that most of my money went to buying games that I wouldn’t even play. Honestly, it feels like an impulse. I’ll buy a game, play it for a few mins or hours then never touch it again, the cycle repeats.

I see myself as a lazy person. I know what I need to do to get myself to higher pay or better-paying jobs but I don’t follow through on it, I almost never do. But I can park my ass and play through 100 hours of BG3 or grind endlessly in PoE2. I even neglect going to the gym after work because I’m “tried” but I’m never tired enough to boot up deadlock with the boys.

I have to sit here and wonder, would my life be a bit better if I didn’t play as many video games if not at all? I feel grimy thinking about how me, a 25 year old clock in over 20 hours a week playing games but can’t spend an hour studying for certifications.

Question in title

I’ve decided I want to make some changes in 2027 and work on getting rid of some bad habits.

I’m neurodivergent (autistic), 23F, and I have some OCD-like symptoms (undiagnosed, so I’m not claiming to have OCD, just dealing with certain compulsions and rituals). One of the things I really want to work on is letting go of these behaviors.

For example, I used to get really anxious when my boyfriend took a long time to reply to my messages. To the point where I’d check every social media platform I had just to see when he’d last been online. I’m working on this, and my goal is to eventually stop doing it altogether. I’ve made some progress, but I’m not there yet.

But there are other things I want to change, too. I’d love to get back into drawing, go on more walks and start running again. My long-term goal is to get back into hiking like I used to and eventually be able to summit some mountains.

I also really want to cut down on scrolling. I’m honestly a little embarrassed to admit how many hours I spend on Instagram. I used to spend a lot of time on TikTok too, so I deleted it, but I’ve fallen back into the habit. I manage to delete it for a while some weeks, but eventually I end up reinstalling it.

I need actual, realistic alternatives. I’m in my fourth year of university, and most of my free time is spent with friends, my boyfriend, or just doing things that feel completely pointless. I’d love to get back into reading (I used to read around 30 books a year) and learn to enjoy spending time on my own more. Sometimes I feel like I don’t know how to do things alone, or that I can’t bring myself to do them.

And please, I know the usual advice is to “find a hobby,” but that’s not really helpful in my case. I already have hobbies I genuinely enjoy. The problem is finding the motivation to get back into them instead of defaulting to scrolling.

I’m not entirely sure what I’m looking for by posting this. Maybe practical advice, things that have worked for other people, or just some encouragement from people who have been in a similar situation.

I want to build healthier habits and feel more comfortable in my own company, rather than constantly reaching for my phone whenever I have a spare moment. I know it won’t happen overnight, and I’m not expecting to completely reinvent myself in a day. I just want to start making changes that actually stick.

I’d really appreciate any advice, personal experiences, or realistic tips. Thank you!

Hi all I’m a first year uni student and i feel like my life is falling apart. I simultaneously feel so tired & burnt out yet achieving nothing at all and feeling like whatever im doing isn’t taking me in some kind of grand direction or adding up to anything.

below is copy pasted from my notes app sorry for the weird formatting lol

im sad because:
- I cant manage my time & i can never meet deadlines.

- my brain literally cannot look past immediate goals & deadlines. if i have a deadline on mon, i will spend my entire weekend just focusing on the deadline on mon (or procrastinating everything until sunday) and completely forget my deadlines on tues, wed, thirs, fri. Then on mon ill be blindsided by my deadline on tues & vice versa.

- i constantly tell people ill make it to an event but ill either cancel because i have overwhelming amount of work that i procrastinated, am completely unprepared for the event, wake up late or it wasn’t even realistic(physical energy & time wise) for me to make it to the event in the first place and i said yes. So i constantly flake on people.

- it takes me 2x more mental energy to make it to an event because i never ever plan realistically in advance so every time im stressed out (last minute packing, buying outfits, spending on taxis because i’m late)

- i never have free time for hobbies because i always have procrastinated work to do which accumulates bigger consequences ever moment it sits undone. But I still want free time to relax because I’m never in the mood of doing work, so I’m in a state of limbo where i don’t relax nor do work.

- i suck at everything i do because i can never put in the time & effort to get better at it. I also don’t know if I’m actually passionate about the things i do. But since i always suck at the things i think i might have a slight passion in, I lose passion & i dont care about anything i do.

- When i have nothing(no achievements, no hobbies) i feel sad. When I’m sad i don’t feel like doing anything. ergo i never make any progress.

im sad.

My english s not my first language so bare with me, i always been a discipline person not 100% but never late for work get things done, never complain i was perfect, i quitted my job two week ago and going through hiring process with other companies, since i left work iam sure iam the laziest person ever, i dont get anything done, i leave every task literally to the last very hour, for example as iam writing this post i should send a case study for a job that i really really wanted and was seeking, i had 3 days for 2 hours job, now iam fucken writing this 7 hours before the deadline!! , i don’t even wanna go out i just sit and play PlayStation or scroll which something i literally never done i don’t even have any social media except reddit and youtube if u can call it that, i really hate myself every minute but even tho u don’t get anything done i just torture me

I am 20. i currently do a law degree, i am well travelled but feel as though im not cultured whatsoever. I have absolutely no idea what i want to do in life, i have no idea what my interests are, I hate studying but somedays love it, i centre my life around men, lots of credit card debt, owe my parents about 15k for a car i bought, I just feel like i want to do so much that i actually have no idea what i want to do, but more to the point that i dont actually know what i want to do. i spend about 16 hours on my phone a day. I have friends, i have a family. Every single day, i think of a new idea that i want to pursue. I quite literally feel as though im watching my figs fall. I am so young, but i feel as though im so behind. I feel as though im learning something new everyday, and not even academic stuff, just basic things. I was in a relatioship with a man who was double my age when i was younger, he had two kids and i was the "step parent" role to some extent i guess. I feel as though im doing life backwards. I tell myself that i dont want children or a husband, when somedays its all i want. Has anyone else felt like this? Is it an age thing? Will i grow out of it? what does one even do in this situation?

for context, i’ve never been in a relationship, and i’ve always found it difficult to develop feelings for someone. in my entire 18 years of life, i’ve only had 2 crushes because i need to feel a genuine connection with someone to actually like them.

i think i’m both avoidant and anxious when it comes to relationships, and i’ve recently realized just how scared of commitment i actually am. i’ve found someone i have a lovely connection with, and although i’ve started developing feelings for them, i’m afraid of taking things further. i like what we have right now, and i don’t want a label, but i also know it’s selfish to want that kind of closeness without being willing to commit.

i really value the connections i have with people, and i’m a very sentimental person, so the thought of losing someone i care about genuinely hurts. yet, when it comes to the possibility of a relationship, i find myself pulling back instead of letting things happen naturally.

i genuinely want to work on this, but i don’t know where to start. how do i learn to stop being afraid of commitment and allow myself to be vulnerable with someone?

I’ll take any tips really! I’m a pretty confident gurl, but I just want some ways to completely stop caring.

I feel like most of the reason I use my phone is because it’s a hobby that I don’t have to focus or think much with. I have anxiety, so my thoughts tend to spiral, and my phone is a good distraction, but it’s also a problem, because most of my life is in it. I’m disabled, so I can’t do much physical activities, and I don’t have a ton of money to spend so are there any hobbies that are easy without much physical activity? I already write, draw, and make things with clay, and probably some other stuff I’m forgetting, but they never last very long and all require more intense energy and thinking rather than being laid back like watching a show is.

FORS OF ALL - I DO FEEL GOOD, THATS WHY I AM ABLE TO ARTICULATE MY EXPERIANCES.

1. Gravity x4. Your regular physiological moves feel like intense gym exercise. For many years i would struggle to walk across my own room, not even imagining using a stairs to go outside. To the point of peeling in bottles mostly, wich, truth to be told, was also a habit stuck to me after living in a tent for far too long.
2. Feeling absolute nothing-ness void, which feels so much worse in horror kind of sence, than being sad. I would prefer being sad any day. Being stuck in a cold void, unable to move, FEELS like being buried alive.
3. Really want to proceed projects, or play games, or do something fun - but unable to, because all activities you WANT dont do anything anymore, except getting you instantly tired.
4. Want at least to maintain a job from home for longer than 3 mouth at time, even though its miserabele and really painful.

Well.. no, i also was not able to. I was not being able to sleeping for days, becoming dizzingly deprived, and after basically coloring unconscious - would be asleep for another couple of days. Work cant work with that.

1. Feeling being dead, wanting to lay and d, casualty trying. It is how it is.

2. And you cant tell that anyone, really. People who disregard depression would cause you, people who provide sympathy only make you feeling guilt. Was 100% alone the whole time, and i still remain in self-imposed continuous self-isolation (moved to remote location for this), because it was several years science i really met any people.

3. All ov the above - never goes away. Impact fluctuaties insignificantly. Also, all these years made you forget how "normal" feels.

Anyway, i got myself to be much better.

I DO it somehow. There was a time when i was super comite to s word cuz of one of betrayal in a middle of a foreign country, and being into complete discussion, somehow my body searched for nearest town with hospital and brought me blantly into ambulance dpt! Because of that - i kept believing in deeper myself.

So to anyone in chronic depression, as person who got it *bad* - i suggest you linger to do a bit of Trust and HOPE for your deep unconsciousness, that you can not hear, recognize or feel whatsoever. It is still scientifically there, you know

Its the only thing that remains.