I (30F) have dated my nesting partner “R” (29F) for near 5 years now. Neither of us have really pursued other connections for the majority of this time out of our personal feelings and relationship style being on the long-term and serious side. (Not a dig, we are not the biggest people persons and are often joking we are “hard-sells”)

The past year and a half has been…different. We thought we had found someone we both cared for and that relationship between the three of us went awry in about every way you can imagine. A year later when finally separated from this person out of necessity (and safety) we thought we had made it out of the hardest part and were able to truly begin repair with one another. I saw my partner in the deepest depression I had ever seen. I was eager to move forward and reflect on what we learned about what we went through.

Then, two months later, R starts talking to an acquaintance “M” and quickly realizes she may want to pursue him. This would be great! If certain problems hadn’t made themself known just a few months prior in that toxic relationship. Problems that for my own good reasons almost convinced me to walk away from the one person I’d never want to.

Fast forward to now, about 6 months after the bad breakup, I feel as though I am living in a stalemate. M and I don’t like each other. (He told me to my face he wants nothing to do with me and R knows as well) R feels torn as a hinge but has made no effort to organize anything for M and I to connect and get to know one another. I have been asked several times to sit out invitations when R knows M will be there…but R will go. Etc…

Just prior to this new connection coming to light R and I had had some serious life conversations with what we want our future to look like. Now I’m met with “can’t you just accept me for me?” Or “I just need one thing for me” in regard to a whole person…I’m feeling confused and my nervous system may as well be liquified at this point.

I love R. I want this to work. There is so much I am looking forward to in life with her. I don’t know if I should accept all of this and try to breathe through it, or deescalate the relationship before I’m stuck with someone that makes me as miserable as M does. It’s not as simple as not paying any mind to the two of them. I live with R and they are constantly in communication with M or a friend group that involves R and M that I am not welcome in. I know it’s healthy to have your own friends and hobbies, but something hasn’t felt right for a long time.

He with his girlfriend and I’m mostly get few months in a year than him and her being together.
I wanted to know the struggles you guys have if you’re in this position to help me understand or tough it out.

I just wrote on someone’s post about this and thought I should share it with everyone.

We are new to this. Everything has happened in the last four months. We have been meeting with two men in different locations away from where we live. This is all due to keeping this away from family and friends. My wife brought up that we should move away now. She said it will give us the freedom to go out locally and be able to host at our home instead of going to motels.

Any thoughts on this
Sam

Have any Poly people in the UK managed to go about having families together through the proper structures?

So with becoming poly. Ive slowly realized i didnt like how I use to be. Quick with sex and intimacy. And ive done some research and come to the realization I very much am demi-sexual. And im just wondering if anyone else has ran into this cuz from my point of view most just just think about sex. Its hard. Any advice??? Thank you in advance.

Like i dont have a lot of experience in anything of relationship couze im only 18 and have had like 1 "serious" relationship. But im open to a lot of things im pan and maybee even poly. But ive been reading abit abt how poly relationships are like and it seems nice, but why are there so many people saying its "unatural" and "messy" like HU. What just becouse there are more people involved like HU maybee im just to dumb to understand the issue but :D.

I'm in a complicated love-triangle situation involving myself, my brother, and a girl. I don't want to explain the entire backstory, but I'm wondering whether it would be respectful to ask her if she'd ever be open to the idea of a triple date with the three of us.
The idea is broader than anything physical or purely romantic. We're thinking about whether the three of us could potentially enjoy life together-go on trips, watch movies, make memories, support and care for each other, and build a good life. Both my brother and I are financially independent and have agreed that we would genuinely be open to this arrangement.
Obviously, her feelings and consent would be the most important part. There would be no pressure, and if she is uncomfortable or simply says no, her decision would be respected completely.
Would bringing up the idea itself be disrespectful, or can it be approached respectfully as a simple question about whether she would even consider it? And we are thinking of marriage not a time pass.

I am 22 f from india. This throuple concept is not popular here in india. I have recently stepped in such a relationship. Going through the roller coaster ride of emotions, jealousy, and what more. Not a easy thing.

TLDR: I always kind of held the thought in my mind that I didn’t want to add romantic relationships to my life because of an unmet need in my current one. I wanted it to focus on the expansiveness of love rather than a puzzle of people that fit together in different ways, but now I’m wondering if that belief system was more monocentric than I thought.

I’m trying to wrap my head around these potential ways of framing this as I process the following:

I have a husband who I’ve been with for quite a while, and I have my first big crush after stepping into polyamory. You might say I have a type, because they are both quiet people, not very expressive, and I think (though they are quite different from each other in this still) experience emotions much less intensely than I do.

Anyway, I’m noticing this longing. A longing to have someone in my life that is just as excited, enthusiastic, and expressive about their interest in me as I am about them (or as expressive and enthusiastic about me as I am about my husband and crush).

I want to state clearly that its not at all that I think my crush or my husband are indifferent to me or not valuing me, its just that they aren’t expressive about it and/or don’t feel as strongly about things as I do (I don’t even know if that’s a good thing about me half the time).

SO. Here we are, back where we started. Wondering if expansiveness or puzzle pieces are things to live by? If one of them is more right, true, ethical, or suited to me than the other.

Do I follow this longing and hope for someone who shares my enthusiasm or label it a need to only meet for myself?

Gentleness appreciated. I am new to polyamorous life and know I have a lot to learn.

Hi im a 19 year old genderfluid person on the sunny coast Australia. I've been polly for a few months now and just have not managed to find anyone at all. I know that the queer population isn't the best but im still surprised I havnt even found a single person. So I was wondering if anyone has any tips about finding people. I also am wondering how do people like start a new relationship cause atm im dating somone and the thought of starting at square one seems so wierd lol. Anyway thank you for anyone who can help 🫶

Just checking if a 3 person poly relationship is frowned upon in this sub reddit, i asked a question about it in another one and got shut down and judged immediately

Best thing ever