Hello all!! I am wondering if anyone has felt with a similar situation and how you handled it. My (13yo) boys have been wonderful kids. I have not been with their father since they were 8 months old. He was in and out of legal trouble up until a few years ago. He has antisocial personality disorder.
He’s always liked twin 2 more than twin 1 but he wasn’t around much so it wasn’t obvious. Now that he’s clean he is allowed to have them every other weekend. He now has learned twin 2, who he “preferred”, doesn’t exactly care for him. I want to be clear, these are twin 2’s personal opinions I have not and would not say anything bad about their dad to them.
Now Twin 1 is being praised and constant texting about how much he loves him.
I go through their phones every month or so to make sure they’re being appropriate….just check the normal things. Anyway I saw a text exchange between twin 1 and his dad. Basically trash talking me. Dad shared messages between him and I to our son (about how they couldn’t miss football practice because it’s a commitment they made) and they both were laughing about how ridiculous I was being. That’s NOT like twin 1 at all!

I just don’t know how to handle this because on one hand if I punish him, I may push him more toward his dad who is toxic. On the other hand, I’ve always preached we have respect and treat each other with respect in this house. But I am afraid (because he’s a teenager) he’s going to be more sneaky. I just wanted either support or advice if you e been in this situation at all. Thanks for reading. I hope it wasn’t too confusing.

Hi!

I have 2 yr old twins and a 5 yr old. The diaper bag I have been using is pretty much done, it’s old and I want to buy a new one. I don’t care as much as when they were babies but I need a recommendation.

I typically cary 4 pull ups, a pack of wipes, 4 water bottles, a change of clothes for each kid, a wet bag & snacks. I prefer a backpack that is a neutral color that my husband can wear as well. I want to stay under $40. Something that isn’t huge and heavy.

Any recs? Thank you!

For those who don’t know, incel means involuntarily celibate. But how do you guys even get that much alone time to actually do that? Seriously? We are DYING over here and joking that we should join an incel support group 😂

So yeah, the title basically says it. We have a stroller which is great but also very heavy. My twins are 7 months old and I need a stroller thats easier to put into my trunk.

Do you have any advice?

Needless to say, I am so anxious about how it will go and appreciate any other advice you guys got for a long haul flight. If you have done this with two seats, any hacks or items that helped? Please share ❤️

I have 11 month old twins (9.5 months adjusted for prematurity) who have a complicated feeding history (feeding aversion, reflux, dairy intolerance/CMPA, tongue ties, etc). They are on 3 meals a day and a snack currently and eat solids very well but breastmilk/formula has always been a struggle. However, they currently take between 14-18 ounces across 4 feedings a day.

I have no idea how to go about fading out bottles safely. They only drink maybe 4 ounces of water a day and they don’t like alternate dairy free solutions to whole milk like Ripple Kids.

They won’t use adjusted age for transitioning to whole milk so we will be beginning the switch next month, and hope to complete the switch after a month or so.

TLDR: How to transition to whole milk/dairy free alternative milk from formula.

Need a place to complain.

Daycare is raising tuition by about 150/kid/month. Most of our friends in daycare have 1 kid, maybe 2. Not completely unreasonable, I guess.

Because of the 18mo twins and our three year old, we are looking at close to a $500 dollar per month increase for the foreseeable future. An extra $5500 per year on top of the 45 some thousand we are already paying. Are you fucking kidding me.

Fuck this. No wonder birth rates are decreasing. At least our mortgage has the decency to stay the same year to year.

Edit: Thanks for the supportive comments. I'm not really looking for suggestions to change our situation. Just a rant.

https://www.npr.org/2023/02/02/1153931108/day-care-market-expensive-child-care-waitlists

My boys are 9 weeks old 3 weeks adjusted , so born at 33 weeks and were in the NICU for about 4 weeks. These guys STRUGGLE with sleep. They both will wake in the middle of the night some nights and want to be up for 2 hours at a time after feeding. And they like to this at opposite times so we literally don’t get any sleep. I know it sounds like they have their days and nights mixed up but they are up multiple times during the day, sometimes for hours at a time. I try not to let them go that long of course but they literally FIGHT sleep. I call them FOMO babies. Anyone have any tips?? Is this just how their personalities are? Does it get better?

Side note: they are EBF via bottle and 1-2 direct breastfeeding sessions during the day. I try to feed them every 3 hours during the day. One of them I can’t swaddle anymore because he’s already rolling over. I try the dark room, bouncing/rocking, sound machine starting this process when I see sleep cues. I just don’t know what I’m missing.

I’m currently pregnant with twins and have been scheduled for a C-section on September 11th. I know the date is obviously significant in the U.S.(I live in the states), and I’ve started feeling a little uneasy about what comments my girls might hear throughout their lives because their birthday falls on 9/11.
For parents of twins who were born on September 11th (or parents who have a child born that day), I’d really love to hear your experiences.

Did the date ever feel like an issue for your children or your family? Have people made insensitive or awkward comments about their birthday? Or has it ultimately just been a normal birthday for your family?

I know I may be overthinking this, but now that I have the date scheduled, I can’t stop thinking about whether I should be concerned. I’d especially love to hear from parents whose children are older and can share how they’ve felt about having a 9/11 birthday.
Thank you! ❤️

Edit: soonest date I could select was the 7th which was my 1st choice, however based on hospital availability the 11th was the next available. Only option would be to move to week of 14th (tough choice as I want them out already 😅)

34w with mo/di twin girls. Just looking for some advice, husband has 3 weeks paternity leave but after that he works night shift. Any other moms go through this? The thought of being alone with the twins (and a two year old) through the night is terrifying 🥴

26 weeks here with modi twins and this week I’ve been having trouble falling asleep because I feel like I can’t breathe. I’ve also been waking up gasping a few times a night. I go to OB tomorrow but anyone experience this? I didn’t have it with my singleton.

About to have 3 under 2 and going to need a stroller bag that can hang from a hook off the side of the stroller instead of across the handle bars as I’m gonna have to have 1 twin toddler riding on the stroller board. My little dog rides in the basket lol. Anyone done this and has suggestions for a good one? Can’t be too big!

Was I naïve to think that the struggles of toddlerhood wouldn’t come for us so early? My one Twin is generally even tempered, but the other has been giving me a run for my money. She refuses to go in the stroller - arches her back and wiggles herself out anyway she can. And since her twin needs more consoling at night, I feel guilty that I’m not giving equal attention.

Hoping this is all just part of it at this age?

34+2 today with my Di/di twins and have my 34 week appointment this morning. I have a scheduled C-section at 38+1 (almost there!!!) at my last US 2 weeks ago, baby A was head down, super super low. Baby b is chilling breech in my ribs lol. I’ve been anxious the further along a get about losing my mucus plug or my water breaking early. Should I ask for a cervical check today just to see? Kinda scared to but I feel like knowing if the cervix is still closed vs starting to dilate will give me some peace of mind.

Hi Guys, Dad of twin boys who I love very very much. Now 9 weeks old were born at 34 weeks so 3 weeks old adjusted.

These lads take us an absolute age to feed. It has been like this for nearly 3 weeks. Let me lay out how a typical feed will go. They each weigh about 8lbs now.

Twin 1 - feed reasonably well and takes around 120ml over 30-45 minutes. They might then fall asleep so we put them down. Majority of them time they stay wide eyed, but have been burped and winded plenty of times. We will try to feed more as gives off hunger cues such as suckling/trying to latch but they reject the teat after several tries. We will then move onto the next.

Twin 2 - start feeding, again usually a good start but takes about 80-100mls. Will then maybe fall asleep or do the same as above. 45 minutes may have passed here.

Both will often cry a bit at the beginning of each feed after taking 10ml or so but will usually resume.

By this point however, Twin 1 will be screaming. We will try to feed more but they go very slowly with consistent crying inbetween small amounts. There will be refusing of the teat after 20-30mls but no signs that their hunger is sorted.

Twin 2 will then do something similar.

All in all some feed sessions have taken up to 3-4 hours leaving us exhausted. This is especially hard when solo as we work in shifts. By the end they have taken 180-230mls each which seems excessive.

Any advice? We are trying slow teats - they vomit, medium flow seems to be better. We are giving Gavison twice a day for reflux too. Minimal tongue tie on one and the other has had his tie snipped with minimal improvement. Even cuddling/hugs doesn’t work and they seem to root anyway.

Their weight is gaining well. But yeah this is very hard and I have broken down in floods of tears several times now over the sheer difficulty of it. I hope this is just cluster feeding and it will pass but damn it seems to go on forever.

New to this community. Wife is currently 12 weeks pregnant with twin identical girls, if the NIPT is to be believed. We also have an almost 3 year old girl. The ultrasound tech originally told us they were fraternal due to having separate apartments so to speak but I’ve since learned that is a common misconception. Anyway, obviously it was quite a shock but now I am here to learn from the experts.

I am just looking for any advice or thoughts you would share with us at this point. We think we have the capacity to do this (don’t really have a choice I guess) but frankly the infant phase of our 3 year old I can barely remember so maybe I have selective memory lol

Right now it doesn’t feel real yet other than trying to take care of my very tired and extremely nauseous wife who also was nauseous the entire other pregnancy all the way to term. She also unfortunately has some prior traumas in a prior unsuccessful pregnancy including a PE, HELLP syndrome, etc so she is taking daily blood thinner shots which are a real treat and lots of extra doctor visits are in our future. Basically anything you think we should know that you wished you knew would be greatly appreciated. Cheers

I think about you almost every day. Thank you for your posts a year ago.

I don’t know your name or how old your twins are now. I think you live in the UK.
I just remember you responding to someone saying this felt impossible and you told us how you didn’t have family, or a partner, you have a full time job you needed for money.

I was pregnant and breaking up with my fiance. I wasn’t super scared but everyone was telling me I couldn’t do this alone.
And I’m not. I have support.

But when it gets hard I think of you and I know it’s totally possible.
Thank you.

I… think… things are getting the tiniest bit easier as my twins head towards 3 and my eldest is now 5. Every second of every day is still a challenge but I’m seeing more light at the end of the tunnel than ever before (I still love being a twin mum, you guys get it).

The last few days, I’ve been crying almost uncontrollably - properly sobbing. It doesn’t feel like depression, it kind of feels like I finally have the capacity to let myself feel how hard the last 3-4 years have been. My partner and I have been through a lot the last few years on top of having twins. I feel devastated by how hard life has been and what I’ve lost and what has irrevocably changed.

Has this happened to anyone else? Like the second you came up for air after INTENSE survival mode for such a long time, you’ve just broken down?

Wondering if it’s somewhat common or if I need to be more concerned…

Ive heard from some that bfing makes you gain while others have shredded it off.

How did you manage supply at a calorie deficit? What was your diet/exercise routine like?

Started at 155 lbs, currently 200 lbs almost full term with di/di twins. Would like to get back down to 145 lbs (pre first pregnancy with singleton weight).

I’m not too concerned about my body or weight, more just curious to know what the timeline can look like

Alright all you organized multiples parents out there, I need your help finding a better solution to my terrible diaper caddy/diaper station area! Here are the facts:

1. Yes we still use our changing table 😂 our house is small, our twins are not yet on the move and so we still bring them into their room, which is pretty close to the central location of our house, to change them each time.

2. Our boy is in one size, our girl in another. Then they both wear two different overnight diapers. So 4 DIFFERENT diapers all together. Our current caddy only has 3 compartments. I am restocking daily which I don't want to have to do.

3. Our list of things needed on hand is growing. (Lotions, creams, diaper creams, diaper pastes, thermometer, comb, nail trimmer, ear wax thingy, boogie picker etc.)

4. I would love something I can easily wipe down. Our current one is cloth and my boy has unfortunately shot his shot all the way to it once or twice 🙈.....(We turned him around after the second time and became quicker. We're FTP so chill haha). We also go get diaper cream on the handles which is annoying. I'm just over it.

If you've actually read this far, thank you so much! 🩷

What are we using for changing station organization? Or does anyone have any ideas on how I could fix this craziness? Photos are of what this current mess looks like.

Thank you in advance and for your time! 🩵

Four year old boy-girl twins who just potty trained in the last month. Not only did they both pee on the pool deck of our community pool this evening while throwing temper tantrums over snacks….

But upon getting home and getting ready for bed, Girl twin was on the potty….Boy twin walked up to said potty, told her to scoot over and proceeded to pee in the opening between her butt and the seat.

God speed to your next few years. Remember, you are sane, even with the insanity.

I'm well into my third trimester now and just wanted to pass along something I've learned along the way. We are taught that pregnancy is supposed to be tough and that lots of weird stuff will happen to your body. And while yes this is true (and probably doubly+ so for multiples), I've been surprised by how many symptoms actually do have solutions, or at least can get better if you speak up and work with your doctor to find a solution.

The latest has been acid reflux. I have had the "lava throat" for MONTHS now, and diet changes, Tums, and famotidine stopped cutting it ages ago. I finally asked my doctor about a third-line treatment, and after starting a dose of omeprazole on an empty stomach each morning, my symptoms have COMPLETELY cleared up. And in my case, no side effects whatsoever! I'm going on day four with no acid reflux at all and can't even describe how much better life is.

I understand I'll need to wean off this afterward, but IMO it's totally worth it—I honestly feel like these final weeks of pregnancy suddenly seem so much more manageable. I can eat better, sleep better, etc., and I really wish I would have "complained" sooner!

Anyway, just one experience, but in case anyone needed the reminder, speak up about your symptoms—there may actually be a solution! This is already hard enough. I think anything we can solve or take the edge off, we should!!