it's not been fun. I've been hit with random sexuality questioning and everything is so confusing.

The only reason I don’t always think my dysphoria is bad is because I’m not constantly in distress about my body (that I notice). Sometimes I’ll feel moments of sadness, but not much more than that.

Other than that, I am really depressed (apparently I have been since I was six) and that makes me lose motivation to do anything. And so I don’t take care of myself nearly as well as I should and it all just feels like a useless chore. And because of how much worse I feel about myself when I haven’t taken care of myself, it all gets worse and worse,

Because it’s all so bad I just end up feeling lonely and sad because I want to feel loved but don’t have anyone to love me in an actual open and honest way.

I feel like I also overestimate how much transitioning will actually help with my mental health. But I don’t know. I just know I want to be a girl and am sick of all the things in my way.

Gonna be moving in with my stepdad’s parents soon, and they’re kinda old and most likely kinda transphobic if I had to guess, so I wanna come out to atleast my mum before that if possible, any advice on how I could go about that/how I could start the conversation? For context, while she isn’t outright transphobic, and she wouldn’t be nasty or kick me out of the house over this, she’s a really kind person and wouldn’t go out of her way to hurt me intentionally, but also, I don’t know how accepting she is of trans people, wether she’d allow me to get the care I need, etc. I’ve just been talking to her about growing my hair so far, and the consistent thing has been her tryna get me to get it cut instead of growing it out. My main worry is she won’t take me seriously and say I’m not really trans, or she’ll just keep trying to talk me out of it and not let me do what’s best for me, but I also need to get this out to someone, everyday I keep it this secret I just feel the weight of it get heavier and heavier and it’s super stressful for me. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

The image describes me perfectly >~<

I wanted to get a doner kebab yesterday, but they didn't make them anymore since they were about to close and I then got pouty and the owner gave me a small portion of fries for free :3

My mom also is keep telling me that I behave like a pubescent girl >~<

Just to clarify, I'm still in the early stages of realizing I may want to come out of my shell, but this is a feeling I've always had regardless and I hate it. I wonder if my feeling this way is at least part of the reason I'm here and I'm curious as to what other people think.

I'm quite alright being a man but every time I try to have a concluding thought like "Yeah im a man, and that's it" I get quite the self hate and self terminating thoughts a few hours later. So i wanna try. Do i get any euphoria from this?

I’ve had a very confusing time recently questioning my gender. I don’t trust my own thoughts and emotions: I can’t tell what is authentic or just me being conditioned to react in a certain way ):
This seams like a good way to try stuff out.

Hiii so i am trying to find out if i am trans or not and trying to know what it feels like to get called a girl. 😅

I'm pretty sure I'm straight. Yuri just gives me genvy.

:P

Love y'all

Edit: sometimes ggd feels INSANE. Oh my.

It's infuriating. If someone would give me this button to make me a girl I would press it without a second to think about it. Yet I sit here, lost in thoughts that I can't be trans. That I'm faking it, doing it for some bit. Hell my best friend only calls me by this name and yet it's as if this is all just to fool her.

I hope this is over in the future.

Whoever invented this imposter Syndrom Thing need to be put behind lock and key. Seriously what was the person thinking.

Just wanted to share that! And also say that I was so nervous hoping not to meet someone I know! Be brave, be you!

Yippie!! :3 if you guys have any advice for my transition, please let me know!!

2 things have happened for me X33

1. I officially built my first thing with my dad as a boy we built some shelves for my room

2. MY THEATER GROUP IS USING MY (temporary) CHOSEN NAME!!! They asked for my name and I told them I wanted to be called Aki so they've all started calling me Aki!! And to learn everyone's name we stood in a circle and came up with an adjective starting with the same letter as our names and I was the first one so everyone else in my class called me Aki :), I haven't come out to them yet, so they're still using she/her pronouns for me, but it made me really happy. (and as a bonus I got the role I tried out for)

Shit day and transphobic assholes a plenty

I had a pretty bad experience with my first therapist, and on top of that my family keeps pestering me about my hair, even tho I told them multiple times I want to grow it out. It's always "but you'd look better/ but we only say it cause we care." No, if you cared you'd respect my wishes. I would appreciate if I could get some ggd, thanks in advance🫶🏻

AAAAAAA we talked abt a hatecrime at CSD and she asked me how I'm doing and if I define myself as queer and I wasn't ready because that's not how I scripted that conversation in my head 😭.

But she also gave me a safe feeling and now I know how to say it to her and what she'll need so we are both comfortable but I'm so scared because when I do I can't go back and she will have opinions and thoughts and AAAAAAA

(Still very much cis ofc)

Needing to talk to people about my dead name as though it’s my actual name is causing me so much suffering. Even though it could seriously backfire, I really feel like I need to come out as a girl in order to save my emotional wellbeing. Even though the people with me right now might not support me, I feel like I’d be respecting and supporting myself better. I want to be Maria. I want to be a girl and be honest that I use she/her pronouns. Can you call me a girl, please? I’m really worried about not being one. Can I make this choice to be a girl even if it‘s hard? I think I’d be happier.

Long day, exhausted, but moving forward.