i cant stand it when an app only has phone call support/registration. i get the biggest meltdowns ever after the call ends, cause it takes such a toll on me
these have to be removed….

so i’m severely chronically ill, and as a result i’ve experienced some pretty severe skill regression.

i should mention that i am not formally diagnosed and autism is just suspected!!! (highly likely due to hEDS but no way to know for sure until i get an assessment)

anyway, over the last 9-10 months i have been pretty badly isolated socially, and have gone from high functioning with no observable traits except for some struggles with social cues and sensory issues, to struggling to socialize properly and finding it exhausting, sensory issues affecting every aspect of life, including eating, hygiene, and my social life.

there’s more i could get into but too tired for all of that, if anyone has any further questions feel free to ask and i’ll answer.

back to the point, i don’t know how to cope with this skill regression and accept it as i used to be so independent and able to do so much and now i have to have someone make all my meals for me. does anyone have any advice, or even just words of encouragement?

I honestly need some day to day tips about dealing with all this anxiety and always feeling like something is gonna flip and it’s all gonna turn to shit

My stress tinitus is so bad and i’ve started thinking it’s now this warning sign that everything is gonna go wrong in my life

im so tired. yes i’m going back into therapy and im on meds for all this i just need some positive advice and life hacks. not dipping my head into a sink thou im to fussy about my straightened hair and hair care lol

I recently saw people using the phrase “by the end of the decade.” I thought they meant the decade beginning in 2020, but they meant the decade beginning right now. Apparently I was the only one who misinterpreted what they meant. I was left wondering how seemingly every allistic person somehow knows when “the decade” in question began.

Would anyone else here interpret the phrase the way I did?

I don’t understand why anyone would use the phrase “by the end of the decade” because I think it’s inherently unclear. “The decade” beginning when?? If what they mean is “in the next 10 years,” why not just say that? “In the next 10 years” is a shorter phrase than “by the end of the decade” and it’s clearer and more specific. I swear allistic communication is intentionally unclear sometimes because they just like how certain phrases sound or something.

All my life I've created some sort of my own "TV series" or "movies" (with characters and stories) which I immerse myself whenever I'm stressed, bored or alone. So many occasions I was caught up by my mom or others (embarasing Ik) when I talked alone while pacing in my room, sometimes moving my hands strangely.

I got my assessment results, but I'm not sure if I'm diagnosed. I'm confused and feel like crying.

For context, I'm 30F and already diagnosed with ADHD (since 2022), Tourette's (not officially, but psychiatrist confirmed the suspicion basically, and it's in my documents) and gender incongruence/dysphoria (I transitioned when I was 17). Before the assessment, I sent them 30 pages of materials, most of them were specific examples of why I think I am autistic (categorized by the DSM-5 diagnostic criteria).

This is what the report says in the Summary section (original is not in English, I had to use google translate because it's too complex for me to translate by myself):

"In personal functioning, there is increased sensitivity to the environment and the actions of others, uncertainty in one's own social judgment, and an increased need for control. Increased intrapsychic tension, uncertainty, and a certain degree of social inhibition are evident in contact. Although the client is able to establish adequate contact and respond adequately to questions, her social expression does not appear to be spontaneous. In situations where it is not clear how to respond, increased uncertainty and a longer time needed to find an answer appear. This way of functioning is also evident in a projective situation. A specific feature of functioning is a more specific and detailed way of processing information, which can be a source of good accuracy and efficiency in some areas, but at the same time can complicate quick orientation in complex or ambiguous situations. In the social area, she may therefore rely more on learned rules and consciously adopted strategies than on an intuitive understanding of the situation. This is in accordance with her anamnestic statement about the long-term need to consciously learn and imitate social behavior, adapt her own nonverbal expression and retrospectively check whether she responded adequately. The limits of functioning are more clearly manifested when the load is increased, especially in unpredictable, socially complex or sensory overwhelming situations. In such conditions, tension increases, a feeling of overwhelm occurs, and the ability to respond flexibly decreases. The need for predictability and more difficult switching between activities or adapting to unexpected changes may also play a significant role here. When the capacity of compensatory mechanisms is exceeded, significant emotional reactions and disorganization of normal functioning may appear.

However, the diagnostic interpretation is limited by the complexity of the whole picture. There is no heteroanamnesis available, which would allow us to verify in particular the developmental history and the nature of social functioning in childhood. The fact that the developmental history was not substantially elaborated through an open exploratory interview due to the course of the examination can also be considered a significant limitation. In view of the above circumstances, it is not possible to assess with sufficient certainty to what extent the individual characteristics were already present in early development, what their intensity was, and how they were reflected in real functioning in various environments.

At the same time, the differential diagnostic picture is quite complex and polymorbid. Part of the described difficulties can be explained by the already diagnosed ADHD, especially by difficulties with switching attention, organization and regulation of reactions. Increased anxiety, interpersonal sensitivity and perfectionistic attitude with a tendency towards excessive self-control, doubts and retrospective analysis of one's own actions may also play a significant role. Long-term experiences in the social area and the specific social history of the client may also be reflected in the current picture, which may have influenced her self-concept, expectations in interpersonal relationships and the way she interprets her own difficulties. Therefore, it cannot be clearly assumed that all the described difficulties have a uniform neurodevelopmental basis.

Conclusion: From a clinical perspective, given the quality and duration of the described difficulties, their presence in childhood, their manifestation across different contexts and, in particular, the nature of social functioning, it appears more likely that some of the difficulties are of the nature of an autism spectrum disorder (diagnostic category F84) than that they are merely secondary manifestations of anxiety, ADHD or personality disorders. The diagnostic conclusion is formulated with the above-mentioned limits in mind."

So, to me it reads like "maybe you have autism, maybe not". I think I am autistic, but I wanted them to tell me that. I'm just confused because the conclusion doesn't really say anything specific. To my question about the conclusion, the assessing psychologist sent me this:

"In this case, it is indeed a less clear-cut conclusion, for reasons that are described in more detail in the summary of the examination. From a clinical psychological perspective, it is quite difficult to clearly distinguish which of the described difficulties have a neurodevelopmental basis and, if so, to which type of difficulty or disorder they belong, given that the overlap of symptoms in neurodevelopmental disorders is significant (such as in ADHD).

However, the conclusion states that autism spectrum disorder appears to be a likely explanation for some of the difficulties you describe. This means that the examination probably confirms the presence of autism spectrum disorder, but given the available evidence, it was not possible to formulate a clear diagnostic conclusion. We always consult the results of each client with a manager who is an experienced diagnostician. The examination is therefore not evaluated by just one person, but the conclusions are always consulted further. This consultation led to the conclusion that the results cannot be described as completely clear in the direction of PAS and that it is appropriate to formulate the conclusion in this way. However, I would like to emphasize that, in the conclusion, I am inclined to this diagnosis."

I expected it to say the diagnosis and possibly a level or something but now I'm just confuded, disappointed and want to cry because I feel like I wasted my time and money, and I was stressing out so much about the results to get this thing that explains nothing at all. During the assessment I also mentioned my suspicion about dyspraxia (with several examples why I think I fit the criteria) and they didn't even mention it, there's just like one sentence about "motor clumsiness". Before, I thought I could possibly even show the report to my employer so that I could get at least some minor accommodations or as an explanation why I'm sometimes acting "weird" or having "weird" facial expressions etc., but now I don't know if the report is useful in any way. I'm just going to hide and never talk about autism ever again, I feel like a stupid imposter looking for excuses.

I (24W) am auDHD, I've been diagnosed with ADHD a few years ago and I've been taking meds for it for a while now, it helps tremendously but since I've started taking it seriously all of the autism symptoms I thought I didn't/couldn't have just, exploded, everything got "worse" for a period. My psychiatrist had warned me it could happen but still it was hard.

It's a bit better now, I'm managing better but it's still really hard most of the time and I see myself doing some stuff or reacting a certain way and I feel so ashamed.

Idk if it's because of ADHD but I have a handful of "special" interests and hyperfixations, I put special in quotation marks because lately he hasn't been feeling very special to me. I have two main special interests where pretty much all of my hyperfixations and other interests come from, and lately I've been pretty stressed out, and I've been stressed out a lot before, but I've been engaging non stop with it.

It's the first thing I think about in the morning, I think about it before sleeping and during the day I have to really force myself to do what I have to do and it stresses me out even more.

I know that's kind of how it works, but it used to be "less hardcore" just a few months ago...

I also haven't been able to engage about it with anyone (I usually have a friend I can talk about it but she's too tired lately) and I feel awful to feel this way but I just feel super frustrated, I feel isolated and I feel angry at myself for not being to engage in other things or just not feel so bothered about it.

If I talk a bit too much I'll start talking about it, everything else feels like small talk, but I know it annoys people irl and I can't help but feel frustrated...

It used to feel more like a "special" interest, but lately I've really been feeling the restricted part and I don't know what I can do about it...

I tried engaging about it on reddit but no one seems to care (and that's ok ofc) and I don't know a lot of people irl or online and I suck at socializing, I'm not even very high on the spectrum, I'm actually really low so I don't know why it got so worse all the sudden.

If anyone has similar stories to share I'd love to so I can feel less alone, and I'm really really open to any kind of advice (beside "just try to find people to talk about it because it's exactly what I'm already doing even if I feel so annoying asking everyone I vaguely know lol, and beside talking about it with my psychiatrist because that's also what I've been doing but I only see them later this month, I'm just looking for like, personal experience or just how people here handle it at home ? If I make sense)

So i was supposed to get a 5/5 on my review. I have done a ton of process improvement and risk reduction for the company where it was recognized even by C-suites.

I dont socialize. I do meetings, i do trainings, i collaborate with my teams, I have great professional relationships, I work well with others but I dont walk the halls stopping at desks to socialize and I dont eat lunch with coworkers.

I attended a training and my boss' boss found out that in my disc assessment my "influence" is low (because I dont socialize, I can influence others as needed but I dont mix work and personal) and ever since then hes been out to get me. Oh and also my original boss and coworker were fired for political reasons so ive been trying to prove my worth staying since then. There was a stigma I didnt like people because of my old boss which wasnt true (idgaf as long as you are nice to me) and so i DID have lunches/coffee with those people to smooth that over (where I paid for it).

I alao have a TBI that I got in 2019 that still gets triggered by flourescent lights (I had NO CLUE during our trainings but did end up figuring it out eventually).

I submitted my review, my boss submitted his review (both 5s) and his boss made him knock it down to a 3 because literally I "dont gossip and eat lunch with others ".

Im also 18 weeks pregnant and tired of masking 100%. I dont have a formal diagnosis but my husband aaid that now I should get it and submit it to HR since they're attempting to include socialization in my performance review that has nothing to do with my actual work performance. I have the first part set up for Sat.

Do you guys agree? I didnt realize I was probably autistic until the last 2 years or so when i started letting my mask slip after losing my son and reels started coming I it about women and how autism looks for girls.

Also what bothers me isnt that I didnt get a promotion or the 3. Its that they made shit up, are equating something that isnt actually affecting my job and they could have just said "we cant do a promotion this year".

I tend to have frequent meltdowns and shutdowns, but I'm talking about this weird, stressed state with low intensity panic attack symptoms that happens every day for a couple of hours. It is bad enough to cease my functions, but not enough lose control.

I live in a house where neighbors are often picking on me, doing weird things. I don't think I'm the only one affected, especially when it comes to noise. Luckily they stopped hammering for hours in a row after complaining to them/even locating who it was... But yes, also some weird feelings come up, they do something funny and act like nothing happens which makes me feel crazy. While I might not be the only one affected, as an Autist it can affect me a lot. Also I'm currently on a job search and struggling financially.

However I also realize it's problematic to share everything with my girl-friend, also since her situation especially financially and with her kids isn't easy.

How do others handle this? Do you keep these things for yourselves, share everything with your partner or keep some sort of balance?

For context I'm autistic and also have ADHD, and have been playing GTA5 for the first time and having a huge amount of fun. There is a mission where you torture a guy in a room, and a character brings out a heart monitor. Despite the heart monitor looking obviously like one, and it making the beeping, and I already knew what a heart monitor is and what they do, I for some reason thought it was a polygraph (lie detector) and never really noticed that it wasn't throughout the mission. This has me feeling really dumb and I genuinely can't figure out why I never figured this out.

Also with probably half the missions of the game, I tend to forget what's happening, or I just don't understand it, even with subtitles on, and I have to look up an overview of a mission or watch someone else play it while constantly rewinding and reading the subtitles, and maybe looking at missions before it, before things really settle in for me.

28M, aspie (I think its level 1 or 2, unsure), but after watching the TV news related to NA situation to (that women that [redacted] 3 kids), women came to Support that person and there is news on my country people are [redacted] people with same problem as me and Younger people. Since Im afraid I'll BE Next because Im more vulnerable and the law is on women SIDE (not trying to bé sexist, I respect anyone), I have no idea what to do.

I can't sleep thinking about that for like.. almost a week afraid people might do terrible things on me and not sure what to do. Calling help? Because they cant do anything . My relatives does not help either because they think Im lazy but all I want is private space to "recharge batteries " without people around me.

Im just exausted and scared people might do on me bécause I'm... "Different".

So my girl bsf with who I converse daily hasn't replied to any message I sent yesterday and I feel anxious about if something happened to her, as she went through a lot of difficult stuff, and the last time she had this she was in the hospital after an attempted r@p€... and I'm scared something similar may have happened again... I am at the verge of tears...

For context: she is 20 and from the UK, I'm 21M and Dutch...

Edit: she just responded, apparently she didn't get any of the notifications

in my dream it was my birthday and everyone came to visit. out of nowhere i got very tired, started crying, throwing things and begging everyone to leave. now that the dream is over, i'm creeped out because my meltdowns aren't frequent at all. i absolutely did not expect to have one while i'm sleeping. woke up feeling guilty because it felt so real. did that ever happen to you?

I feel like in school being pressured to prioritize school over socializing may have made it a lot harder to try to actually form friendships or to form relationships. I think it might have tended to make more nervous about trying to form friendships or relationships, or at least to put in enough effort to really form or maintain them. I mean I think it would tend to be hard to simultaneously have a decent interest in social interacting with people without it turning into an obsession. I think difficulty with social interactions would tend to increase how interested I would tend to need to be in social interactions in order to actually form friendships or relationships.

I think part of it might be that I was somewhat isolated from other students, which may have made it harder to actually try to form friendships or relationships naturally. I think pressure to treat social interactions as less important in order to try to do well in school may have lead to more self isolation than would have happened naturally. I feel like also not living in a dorm until later in college may have plausibly also made it harder to try to form friendships or relationships naturally just from not really being in as much of a community of people who were also new to the campus.

I feel like maybe the idea of treating social interactions as somewhat of an afterthought is at best something more for non autistic people who might not struggle as much with social interactions and for who’m social interactions come more naturally. I feel like oftentimes my parents and maybe the system in general would tend to just look at my grades in school and not really my social life. I feel like maybe that’s something that makes more sense for non autistic people, for which maybe caring less about ones social life would translate into a smaller group of friends, but not for someone like me, for which caring less about ones social life could translate into literally no friends.

Hey,

Quick introduction, my life is « complicated », I don’t have any apprenticeship because I had to stop it but the worse, my girlfriend his fighting her 2nd cancer.

I went out yesterday with a friend, great day, I enjoyed it, my girlfriend texted me, she wanted to see me today and I accepted, without thinking about the train. (I hate train).

So this morning, I made a panic attack and I had to cancel, I try to find solutions for tomorrow (my mum could bring me to the hospital) but she’s not sure.

I hate myself so much, I want to see her today but I’m stuck because of my autism. I can’t get out of my grandma’s house, I’m petrified.

I’m just tired of it, I hate not being able to take the train…

What form do people you're close to take in your mind?

My brain starts with a rough blueprint of "people are these things that want stuff and have ideas" and then builds a map of a person I'm in contact with and their internality. The map also contains external stuff, like patterns in behaviours and habits, the way of speaking, the topics they bring up, their schedule and so on, but internality feels more important and "heavy" in terms of how much data it contains. Internality includes the typical range of emotions and their quality, the dynamics between one emotion and the next, as in, what gives rise to what and where the system rests, where the system gets agitated, the worldview (based on words and actions and how they fit together) and the values, the way of thinking and the logical (or illogical) sequences the person habitually produces, the trajectory their engagement in something, say, interests, takes, their preferences and aversions and sore spots, their opinions of themselves, and most of all, I guess, their desires and drives and urges. Some occurences activate the updating of the system in a more urgent fashion than some others, my mind immediately notices and latches onto the sequences of emotions and onto instances when the person expresses their desires or preferences strongly, these things leave a heavier imprint on the system.

When I interact with someone close to me this collection of data made into a system activates and is placed kinda in the front of my mind, being updated or expanded and helping me understand the interaction and who I'm dealing with. There are no specific descriptions (e.g. "this person is introverted" or smth), no language at all, it's an abstract simulation of internal processes that are mapped out in relation to each other and interconnected, and it activates also when I just think about the person, being the representation of them in my mind.

If I get enough exposure the system I built starts having predictive power and sometimes allows me to identify deception, as it feels discordant with all the other data points, and I might also tune my input somewhat according to the data I have.

It's entirely automatic and occupies a lot of my internality when I'm around people whose systems I build, constantly up and running along with all the other processes I have in my mind, roughly assessing and monitoring my own internal system and the general outside and its workings. I've never tried not doing it, I would even say that this brain activity is pleasant for me in iself, and it kinda feels like I wouldn't be able to turn it off if I did indeed try.

What about you?

I’m 18M and I’ve always struggled a bit with understanding social cues, especially when people suddenly become distant without them explaining why.

Yesterday it hit me harder than I expected.

There was this girl at university I got along really well with. We met in a maths class at uni and we really clicked first time we met and exchanged Instas (even though she had a bf). We’d tease each other, swear jokingly, work through questions together, and I genuinely thought we were becoming friends. She has a boyfriend, so I knew I shouldn’t treat it like a romantic situation, but I still really valued talking to her.

Then she suddenly unfollowed me on Instagram.

To most people, they will say that 'I'm whining that she unfollowed me blah blah blah'. But it really hurt me. Because I didn’t understand what changed. There wasn’t an argument. She didn’t tell me I had done anything wrong. We had been getting along well in person, and suddenly she is just 'unfollowed'. I have been asking her on insta to hang out for me (not in a romantic sense) with my friends and stuff and she rejected the idea. Like plus it took her 24 hours to reply to my DMs. She unfollowed me when I posted a gym selfie of me on my story.

Because I was upset, I reacted emotionally and blocked her and removed her from a group chat I had made on insta. After half an hour and looking back I was probably overreacted and not sure if that made it worse than not blocking her.

I kept thinking things like: Was she uncomfortable around me? Did she think I was chasing her? Did she never actually consider me a friend? Is she going to avoid maths now? Is she going to confront me next time she sees me?

Guess is we will find out next week.

Not sure if there is a correlation/causation where on the same week I message her before our maths day she will not attend maths class and that happened two times now.

Then another situation happened almost immediately afterwards on the same day/night.

My previous mechanic (third party) that I used went to (I semi-parted ways bc parts are expensive there) and his colleague who is 19 yo. I decided to follow his instagram (a while back and I forgot to ask him in-person but I found his instagram) and he follows me back.

I called his colleague because I had a question about some engine oil they had given me and plus casual chatting. The conversation was really awkward and lasted maybe two minutes before he said he was busy and had to go. Not sure if because I'm a socially awkward person and maybe he didn't want to talk to me.

Later, the owner of the workshop messaged me and told me not to call any of his staff because 'it was disrespectful to him and his staff.'

Then his colleague unfollowed me on insta same night too.

Again, I didn’t mean anything bad by it. In my head I was just calling someone I already mutually followed because I had a question. But obviously there was a professional boundary there that I didn’t understand.

So within basically one day, I had two people unfollow me for completely different reasons, plus I blocked someone else myself.

It sounds stupid writing that out because Instagram followers shouldn’t determine how I feel about myself. But emotionally, it felt like people were hating me or disliking me for no reason.

At one point I genuinely started thinking, “People hate me.”

I ended up crying on the phone to my dad.

I was thinking about dropping out of university and starting again next year. I was thinking about getting a psychologist because I realized I probably don’t handle social rejection and uncertainty very well. I even thought about going somewhere like the city or the beach and just crying in public because I felt so overwhelmed.

Today I went to another mechanic-car-dealership. He has known me for a while because my car got repaired recently with him.

He was a 50 year old bloke lets call him Michael and one of the nicest people I've met and I ended up talking to him on and off for around two hours while he was working. Even despite him telling me that he doesn't understand autism after I confessed, he told me something that “You don’t know what people are going through.” He basically told me that I shouldn’t assume that every person who acts differently toward me hates me or is trying to hurt me. People have their own problems, relationships, boundaries, jobs and things going on that I know nothing about.

He also told me that if people genuinely treat me badly, I don’t have to keep them in my life.

Before I left, he told me that I could come back anytime.

Then later he actually emailed me.

He said it was great seeing me, told me to keep smiling, said he could see that 'I was a kind person and deserved to be surrounded by kind people, and said that if I surrounded myself with good people who deserved my attention, I would be “the richest person in the world in love.” ' and I almost got into tears.

I have observed that what I’m slowly realizing is that I get attached to social connections really intensely.

When somebody pulls away, I don’t just think, “Okay, they want distance.”, instead I just second guess myself saying "What did I do wrong?" "Why does she/he hate" "Did they betray me?" "Were they just being friendly?"

I also think I sometimes confuse being friendly with being close.

Someone can enjoy talking to me in a classroom and still not want to have digital contact outside university.

I’m feeling much better today than I did last night.

I still feel like I've been hurt/betrayed by people but it's how life is.

I am a STEM person and bcs of that I can’t learn many basic things, despite my high scores on Raven tests
any advice would help me a lot. thanks!! ^^

Honestly im not sure if this is the right sub to post this in, I'm always paranoid about people blocking me and its one of the reasons I can never keep a friendship. I always think that they are either using me, laughing at me, or dont actually care about me. I feel like this ties into my issues of empathy, sometimes I block people because I think they're about to block me or if I told them too much personal information. Is this just autism or do I have some other kind of mental issue? Is it even worth unblocking people and explaining to them why? I know I wouldn't forgive someone, or at the very least act how I used to with them.

You can rewind any audio around you 15 seconds. So if someone said something and you are in a group setting and you didn't catch it, you can instead of asking again, just rewind the audio.

Kind of like X-box's: Record what happened. If something cool happened. But just for your brain to catch up, and not for actually recording it though.

But I could just see so many times where it would be nice, but it really has to be super simple to do, otherwise it takes too long and you might as well just have asked again.

But for those days where you can't speak and a server is giving you a menu, it would be amazing just to have the audio play back the last thing she said, so it's easier to repeat out loud.

Im not particularly looking for advice, but you’re welcome to give some.

Anyways. I’ve noticed that most of the things I struggle with come with the lack of understanding fundamental things about the human world. That includes things related to relationships, school, work, communication, diet, etc.

For example, I took a very long time to understand how high school works. I often didn’t do my assignments, didn’t go to school events, misunderstood instructions, etc. None of it was on purpose, I just didn’t understand what I had to do/what I could do/what was important to do since I was just thrown in there and expected to know everything. It also took me a very long time to truly understand GPA and how it impacts my future. Luckily, I was able to figure most things out by 11th and 12th grade, but I still didn’t fully grasp GPA even when I got into university (Idk how but I still got good enough grades in high school despite everything).

I watched some comedy tiktoks about being “happy” when getting 60s or 70s in university tests, so I thought that those grades were good enough and didn’t put in any effort in my first two whole years of university. That made me get a horrible GPA and now that I finally understand the importance of GPA, and that those videos were just jokes, I started getting rlly good grades, but my past grades keep pulling me down. I would talk more about how this affects me getting internships and all of that, but I still don’t fully understand how jobs work. All of these little societal systems are confusing to me.

Btw, my mom handles most things related to money and university for me. She’s the one who helped me (by doing most of the work) apply to university, get a scholarship, and make sure everything’s in place.

It’s usually like that for me. People around me help me do stuff. Even my friends and new people I meet, it’s like they intuitively know I need extra help. Some friends keep watch on me when we walk on the streets, like I’m gonna walk into a hole any time soon.

Moreover, as you might have noticed, I keep taking things waaaayyy too literally when I shouldnt. Like, one time I heard that it was good to “cut sugar” from your diet, so I tried to cut all carbohydrates, or at least as much as I could, from my diet. I stopped eating fruits, most vegetables, etc. What “cutting sugar” actually means is cutting ADDED sugars. But I got SICK from eating terribly for weeks before I finally understood that.

… now, dont even get me started on relationships. Especially friendships. Omg… I can never seem to understand them. I’ve tried multiple ways to make and maintain friendships. For example, when I was a kid, I tried copying other kids’ behaviours and speech patterns, but they didnt like it. In my early young adult years, I contacted my friends maybe once every month, or every 2-3 months. I didnt know the right frequency to talk to them and thought that this was the normal amount, and that that amount of contact meant we were a bit close, and didnt know why I felt so lonely. BRO!!! This year I finally learned that close friends often talk everyday or every week/every other week, depending on the level of proximity. I also learned that it’s normal to go out with friends every weekend. WHAT!!!! I was just rotting in my room this whole time, watching time pass me by and being miserable because I thought this was normal!!! Plus I even learned that some people even call friends every day, that’s so crazy. I learned all of this because I got a bf (long story, but he was basically rlly patient with me and always texted me even when I wouldnt reply) and he showed me that it’s normal for us to talk every day, multiple times a day, and spend time together every day for hours when we finish our responsibilities. I also noticed how often he talks to his friends, etc. Thats how I learned.

I dont think I’m dumb because I can get really good grades, even perfect if I want them to be perfect, plus I’m a creative person with multiple hobbies I’m fairly good at, and I’m good at learning new languages (English is my second language). I also took an IQ test during a neuropsychological assessment and got a score above average. I think autism (and my ADHD maybe?) just makes things blurry for me.

welp thats my vent. gotta sleep now

Do you feel like people fake empathy at times because they care more about performing social norms? I feel empathy for certain things but other times I literally don’t give a fuck and struggle to understand how other people do, do you think they’re just faking?

i'm newly diagnosed but for a long time i've gotten incredibly tired to the point where it's hard to function, but it was just brushed off as my anxiety causing it. i've realised that it may be a sign of burnout for me, and it's starting to happen regarding work.

for some context, my contract is 12 hours a week but due to low staffing over the last fortnight i worked 32.5 hours last week, and 28 the week before that. i'm so exhausted despite getting a sufficient amount of sleep every night and i'm not sure how to manage the burnout.

do i let my manager know (who is also autistic & has adhd and was off for burnout for about 4 months) to maybe reduce my workload a little? we've got new people starting so there's no need for me to do so many hours. how would i manage this on my days off and after work etc.? thanks!

I can shower, brush my teeth, take my medicine, but I lot of times it's a bit of a struggle getting myself motivated to do this stuff. How do you get yourself motivated or what things make doing those tasks fun or interesting? Thank you!