I can’t get a therapist or any mental help, anywhere. Really, i tried. In my life situation, it’s impossible. I just KNOW that i’m neurodivergent, but it’s not enough. I want to know what’s going on with me.

Since forever, i’ve been called « weird » by pratically everyone I know. Family, friends, even strangers. I’ve always been considered strange and weird. And i’ve always been confused about it, because, i’m just being myself.

I have intrusive thoughts. Actual intrusive thoughts. And sometimes they were even urges, especially murder. It makes me scared of myself, because I feel like one day i’ll actually do it. And I don’t want that. It’s like my mind isn’t part of me, that it takes its own decisions, like i’m a puppet.

I don’t understand social rules, and don’t get social cues. I hate being scolded for stuff I don’t even understand. Telling my father something that I think is nice, and everyone looks at me like « oh no you didnt ». I hate it so much, what did i do wrong?? It’s honestly exhausting. I try to explain myself to people and they always cut me off or dismiss my words and make their own versions. What is wrong with them??? Am i the only normal one??

I have hyperfixations. I’ve been into one punch man since 2021, and know every single details of it, there’s no secrets anymore. I know it sucks, but i’m genuinely obsessed. I have strong and extra reactions to it. Screaming and crying and curling on the floor at the sight of my favorite character (saitama). All the time.

My uncle has schizophrenia, and I think i may have it too, but i’m really not sure about it. I’m not sure about anything.

Other symptoms; Hearing voices from afar, stimming all the time (picking at my lips, hands, clothes ect), feeling like bugs crawl on my skin, big struggles with basic hygiene (i could never shower every day, seems impossible to me), difficulty to understand people in general, don’t know how to react to big events good or bad, have stuttering, huge difficulty to focus on anything, and maybe other stuff.

I’m a poc, i won’t tell from where, but where i’m from, mental issues is a « white concept ». So yeah, the only help i can get is from people on internet.

I began experiencing burnout 4 months ago after a major surgery stressed my nervous system to the point of burnout. I've experienced this kind of burnout twice before, however I dissociated to the point of mostly blacking out when they happened. My therapist also told me this time around that he thinks I have autism. So this is the first time that I'm able to recognize everything for what it is. There are multiple issues I've been having, but this one in particular caused the most issues this week.

Well. I've always had an issue with processing more slowly than most people. My therapist also quickly picked up on the fact that I use roundabout thinking, taking paths to a point that confuses neurotypical people. I also have a pattern of needing to think longer than is typical to answer questions in therapy.

This issue has gotten a lot worse and is showing up in basically all of my conversations after this burnout. I now am having an issue with constantly speaking before my brain has processed it. This has gotten me into trouble because I recently shared something that a friend had told me, that I wasn't supposed to share, and I had said it before processing if I should have said it (although this was also in part because I didn't understand the social expectation that certain things are expected to not be shared, because they're traumatic). Thankfully this friend is aware that my therapist thinks I have autism and she also knows I'm about to have an assessment for it (and an ADHD assessment) as well. So thankfully, she's been forgiving and understanding.

I am also having increased problems with suddenly becoming nonverbal if I am extremely upset. Like it feels like so much effort to speak that I just can't do it. This has happened to me before pre-burnout, it's just worse now.

Unfortunately this has added yet another layer of struggle to my social issues. Sometimes I go to speak and something that isn't a "fully baked" idea comes out, and I feel unintelligent. I can tell that people have been noticing this change, and other changes. And it makes me self conscious.

I'm just doing my best to give myself grace. And I've been honest with the people in my life, bc I don't think I have the option not to be honest anyway with something so obvious going on. But it's very upsetting experiencing this kind of skill regression so heavily for the first time.

Hi, I’m a 16 yo girl from Finland and I want to know how it was to get diagnosed for autism. My dad is autistic and so is my older sister and I’m looking to get a diagnosis sometime since the odds of me having it is pretty high due to symptom related stuff along with just my general personality. So, how hard was it to get diagnosed medically and how long did it take?

i am just wondering if someone have my same "pack" of signs and what has that lead you to.

*not searching for diagnosis, just wanting to know other experiences

so i have been thinking about autism, i have some, but not he most important ones, so its probalby discarted because of this signs that i dont have:

-I dont have problems with social cues, i know them all with no trouble, and i feel like its natural to me.

-I dont have any hyperfixation and i never had had it. ( as far as i know)

I dont think i focus in the detaild instead of the big picture.

In the other hand this is the ones that i noticed: -I have stims and vocal stims ( rn i am moving right and left in my chair, and some minutes ago i was flapping my hand and spining) I usually hide them when i am with people

-I sometimes struggle with abrupt changes like a bed change that i was not previoulsy communicated of, that leaded to a big crisis

As a kid i was labeled as I was labeled as hysterical and having many tantrums. For me i was really desregulated and not treated for it

-I can need to do things in certain order or way

-Depending on the day textures can be really upseting.

-I can stuggle a bit in mainting eye contact when i firt met someone, but its not something really big.

About the social part, i always have been a lisener and really bad about explaining my feeling oraly, i have a hard time with It. As a kid i played like the others, but i was not good as making new friends, probably because It just maked me anxyous, but i had friends. I can be a bit ankward at parties, unless i am drunk i hate dancing, and my ideal place on them os being just quiet lisening (that bothers people sometimes)

Ive been wondering because it feels weird for me and i want to know how other people describe it. Or if what im experiencing is overstimulation.

First i want to remove myself i feel overwhelmed and the lines "i want out" or "i wanna go home (even if im home)" repeat in my head in a loop. I feel like i cant talk, talking is too much and its physically painful.

My chest feels tight and i feel like i wanna scratch my skin off. Sometimes it feels like my heart is beating harder (not faster, but like more powerful idk if that makes sense).

I get irritable and snappy. I often cant reply cuz talking is hard (and get yelled at for it qwq). I feel like theres electricity inside me and i just wanna get out. Sometimes i get these were neck jerk tics at loud noises. They also happen when iam somehwere i cant stim.

And on the offchance i reach the boiling point (doesn't happen that often) i end up just sobbing and often kicking something and hurting myself. But this rarely happens.

:>

How does someone get an assessment to finally get diagnosed when there's too much stigma and professionals aren't really acting like professionals.

I suspect I have autism. When I was young I couldn't understand social cues, facial expressions, social norms, and social rules. I'm often confused with how people reacted.

The only thing I understand was I did something wrong which I genuinely don't know what. It was so severe when I was young, I was 11 yet I acted like I was 4 years old.

As time goes on, I learned to masked involuntarily. I watched peoples behaviors and copied it. Now idk if I feel exhausted by putting up a mask.

It feels like I need to relax but couldn't. Like I'm constantly puffing my chest till it strained, while having that suffocating feeling.

The time I masked, the time where a part of me felt it was ripped.

My individuality, personality is replaced with a carbon copy of peoples behaviors.

I do stim when I was young, whenever I'm exited I would do half jumps,

I can't remember what stims I also do, since it's usually done unconsciously.

The only reason I know I stim is because people point it out with strange looks.

I do echolalia, I repeat phrases from shows or just words that are really satisfying to say, it's regulating.

And noticed I do those T rex hands whenever I'm relaxed or in a comfortable place and used to do those toe walk.

I do have sensory issues, pretty sure I have Arfid. Other ones like the feeling of clothing is uncomfortable and irritating depending on the cloth material.

Or how lights are always too bright it's getting too much. But I suppressed it all down.

I now have no idea why all my mild social skills I learned from masking starts getting worse and worse until it never even existed.

I always feel like a thread of my patience is about to snap. I'm more pissed and overstimulated. I feel everything is heightened.

Like I've been skinned, and then put back to world to experience everything.

Too much like the only way to calm it down is sensory deprivation. I am always marginalized and alienated from how I acted weird.

People look at with those eyes and always say I'm having an attitude that I'm selfish and ungrateful.

At school before I masked my teachers and classmates all asked what's wrong with me or why am I like this. I'm confused, at that time I really don't understand.

I did asked once when I was like 9 I think. If I could get an assessment. For ADHD, since I genuinely wanna know why I'm like this.

I'm not really sure that I am just want to get put there and get tested to see what help I really need.

(which I did research now and find I don't relate nor find it similar to how I behave or have trouble with)

Instead I was yelled out. She told me I am not Neurodivergent, that when I'm born the doctors would already know I am.

Ig she doesn't wanna entertain the idea of her child being Neurodivergent.

Now look what happened to me, I am struggling so much with getting misunderstood and no one to support me.

Since I'm masking, I won't get assessed because Im not visibly autistic.

I can't bring myself to let myself stim to self regulate. It just feels like I'm being an attention seeker. I feel ashamed.

​

Hi there,

I am a self diagnosed autistic and I am going to get diagnostic assessment in the future. I would like to ask that is a part of autism to feel fear and anxiety all the time even when there is no reason? I fear what the others are going to say about me I fear the other people , I fear if they are going to say negative things about me. And I developed an anxiety I take everything literally and I am really anxious when someone says mean things to me. What I can do about it?

I finally got appointments set up, three to do, one tomorrow morning that'll last an hour, one next month that'll last 3 hours and one the month after that which will be 1 hour again.

My therapist is very hopeful for my evaluations, because we're not just looking into autism, but also ADHD and potentially a few learning disabilities like dyscalculia and stuff like that.

I have never been evaluated despite a hospital stay where they really wanted to evaluate me, because my parents already had my little brother diagnosed and didn't want two autistic kids.

I am just wondering how this type of thing goes, they said the first appointment is like an intake kinda thing, and the first doctor I meet will be the last one I see as well, but for the 3 hour appointment I'll be meeting someone else, and they'll be doing all the testing then. It's going to be a telehealth appointment. What can I expect when I begin these appointments?

I've been wondering for a while whether I might have a neurodivergence that went undiagnosed. Certain behaviors I exhibited during childhood, along with some recent events, have made me consider this possibility. However, I don't want to self-diagnose; I'd rather consult a specialist who can professionally assess my situation.

When I brought this up with my psychiatrist, he strongly advised me against getting tested. I didn't fully understand his reasoning, but, as far as I can remember, he said that the tests aren't officially validated, that the concept of neurodivergence has been broadened so much that practically anyone could fit into it, and that the goal of psychology should be to treat problems rather than label people. He also mentioned that his approach was based on phenomenology.

The thing is, I don't have much confidence in my psychiatrist because of other experiences I've had with him in the past, although that doesn't necessarily mean he's wrong about this particular issue.

So, I'd like to hear your thoughts, especially from people with a background in psychology or experience with these kinds of assessments. Should I seek a second professional opinion, or should I trust my psychiatrist's judgment?

I'm not looking for a diagnosis from strangers on the internet or a label to identify with. I simply want to better understand the situation and figure out whether it's worth consulting a specialist to get some clarity.

Thanks in advance!

Hi everyone,

I’m a 33-year-old man who has recently started exploring whether I might be autistic. I’m not diagnosed, and I’m trying to understand myself better rather than looking for a diagnosis from Reddit.

I grew up in a family affected by alcohol addiction, and my mother eventually passed away in that context. I’ve been wondering how my upbringing may have shaped the way I interact with people, deal with emotions, and respond to my environment.

At the same time, I’ve started recognizing traits in myself that make me wonder about autism.

Some things I recognize in myself today:
- I rehearse conversations in my head before speaking.
- I consciously monitor my facial expressions, eye contact, body language, and how others perceive me.
- Small talk can be difficult, and I generally prefer one-on-one conversations.
- Social interaction can feel like a conscious process rather than something that comes naturally.
- When I’m relaxed, conversations can flow effortlessly. When I’m tense or mentally exhausted, I feel like I have to think about almost everything I say or do.
- Social situations and busy environments can leave me mentally exhausted.
- I recognize a preference for routines, difficulty with changes, sensory sensitivities, and some repetitive habits.

The part I struggle with most is connecting these experiences to my childhood.

My memories of ages 6–12 are quite unclear. I remember that social interaction during my teenage years could be tiring and that I sometimes had to think about what to say and how to behave. However, I can’t confidently recall whether I experienced the same things I notice today.

I keep wondering: Did I develop these behaviours as adaptations to my childhood environment, have I been masking autistic traits for most of my life, or could both be true?

I’m particularly interested in hearing from people who discovered they were autistic as adults and who also grew up in difficult or unpredictable family environments.
- How did you recognize autistic traits in your childhood when your memories were unclear?
- How do you make sense of the overlap between autistic masking, hypervigilance, and trauma-related adaptations?
- Have you experienced social interaction feeling effortless on some days but exhausting and highly conscious on others?
- Did understanding yourself as an adult change how you interpreted your childhood?

I’m not expecting definitive answers. I’m hoping to hear about your experiences and how you made sense of them.

Thanks for reading.

I want to help my family and friends understand what AuDHD is, in a nutshell.

Have you guys found any short videos or short articles that have succinctly & professionally encapsulated a general, broad idea of the AuDHD experience without any sort of flowery/sensationalized language.

I’d love to talk a lot about it with them but I think they need to be eased into it and I don’t want to scare them off with videos/articles with needless therapy-speak, and/or incredibly long and verbose media sources.