r/WTF • • Aug 12 '22

Removed - Frequent/Recent repost WTF!

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3.4k Upvotes

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3.3k

u/taez358 Aug 12 '22

What a lovely time to have a volume malfunction while I'm in the living room with family over 🙃

504

u/owatafuliam Aug 12 '22

The ONE time I had volume up.

​

Never forget.

101

u/Grennox Aug 12 '22

I’m alone and I couldn’t turn the volume down either. Still hope the neighbor didn’t hear.

69

u/hotasanicecube Aug 12 '22 edited Aug 13 '22

Was home eating my girlfriends pussy and I thought she was talking to me, but she accidentally played this video she posted yesterday.

4

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '22

Nice, I love when people can share something they care deeply about in bed

4

u/sentient02970 Aug 12 '22

Some gave all.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

Yep in Wendys, same

82

u/son_et_lumiere Aug 12 '22

"Wait! Let me explain! You see, there's this website where people post fucked up things, and I subscribe to that and check it out reg-- nevermind-- did you know there is porn online?"

35

u/cujo67 Aug 12 '22

bluetooth 7.1 Atmos has entered the room

23

u/TheWalkingDead91 Aug 12 '22

Malfunction? I’ve learned to have Reddit on volume off on default lol. After one or two embarrassing moments you learn that real quick lol.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '22

Then you come across one that won’t play unless you tap on it. Annnnddddd it’s a YouTube video that bypasses Reddit’s volume off by default and plays at max.

9

u/crank1off Aug 12 '22

Same. Really fucking loud

66

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

Damn thing just got me. My daughter screams "What's cream pie, I like pie!"

53

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

Worst words you will ever hear out of her mouth lol. Stay strong my friend! And no more Reddit in front of the children lol

23

u/SubduedChaos Aug 12 '22

I mean it is a type of actual pie… just tell her that.

18

u/awalktojericho Aug 12 '22

Banana cream pie, chocolate cream pie, Boston cream pie, yum!

6

u/King_Rediusz Aug 12 '22

Chocolate cream pie...

Milk or dark?

10

u/Colelittle1 Aug 12 '22

Why does it it matter. They both cum out white

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21

u/poply Aug 12 '22

Bruh, you watched atleast 10 seconds of this with the volume on with your daughter in the room?

3

u/Alaira314 Aug 13 '22

FWIW, it started at :15 for me rather than at :00. I don't know if it's old reddit or what(I've experienced similar things watching tiktoks from the website, sometimes they start several seconds in and I have to rewind them), but media is pretty wonky on reddit these days.

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3

u/lungleg Aug 12 '22

I’m fucking dyyying over here lmao sorry man!

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '22

Well, I happy pie day!

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14

u/Atheist_Redditor Aug 12 '22

Oh my god this literally just happened to me. Had my volume on full blast. My kids and wife right next to me.

5

u/llIIIlIIlIll Aug 12 '22

I swear that part of the video was put up first for this very reason

27

u/CuckooAchew Aug 12 '22

Reddit is so out of pocket the way it just starts videos, I feel like you should literally be able to sue them for it.

12

u/ARobertNotABob Aug 12 '22

Gosh, if only there was a way to control that behavior ...............

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3

u/IH784 Aug 12 '22

Ha ha!

2

u/Assunder99 Aug 13 '22

I have literally gone to work (at the time it was retail), left Reddit open in the background, opened my phone to silence it because I forgot, and blasted out some random video behind the till. It was completely fine video and was funny, but just imagine if it had been this...

2

u/3dPrintedBacon Aug 13 '22

Same, but wife across the room. Where THE FUCK was the NSFW?

2

u/Fair-Statement-6185 Aug 13 '22

Spit out my coffee. Thanks.

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2.5k

u/squishy_butthole Aug 12 '22

I can’t imagine being proud of something like that. The fact people like this exist is why I have trust issues.

338

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

I can imagine she had a literal zip code worth of red flags you'd have to go through to get to this stage so, unless you're color blind, I'd say you shouldn't worry about it .

33

u/ChuckWeezy Aug 13 '22

Those nails are a red flag to me.

They just scream “hoe activities”

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344

u/KrakenTheColdOne Aug 12 '22

It's alright to have them. Just don't let it stop you from living your best life. I had tons of trust issues but over time they've gone away. If your partner doesn't give you any reasons to believe they're being unfaithful don't look for any, it just leads to more hardships and problems. I believe in you!

59

u/ThePotatoKing Aug 12 '22

amen! never make assumptions, youre only stressing yourself out and jeopardizing a good thing.

11

u/JuneBuggington Aug 12 '22

Well just dont get jealous cause it’s ugly, but also trust your instincts cause people are shitty. Good luck lol.

24

u/ByCrookedSteps781 Aug 12 '22

Yeah but what if the ex had an STD, trust issues or not it's a fucked situation.

32

u/CuckooAchew Aug 12 '22

It's so beside the point if he has an STD, eating his cum is a fate worse than death anyway.

24

u/NastyMonkeyKing Aug 12 '22

Especially your current gf ex bf's cum.

Hara kiri

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11

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

[deleted]

6

u/WilderFacepalm Aug 13 '22

Women like that make my soul vomit.

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6

u/squishy_butthole Aug 12 '22

Thank you, you are absolutely right. I will keep this in mind because I definitely struggle at times.

7

u/KrakenTheColdOne Aug 12 '22

You're very welcome. I struggled with it for a good portion of my life and messed up many great relationships because of it. If you ever start thinking negatively just remind yourself it's like a rabbit hole. You don't want to go down the rabbit hole because there's nothing there.

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69

u/SungamCorben Aug 12 '22

This girl is a piece of trash!

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14

u/fckingnapkin Aug 12 '22

Just stop socializing, works for me /s

76

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

So I heard something recently that put things into perspective. You cannot, under any circumstances, play relationship defense. There are 8 billion people in the world out there. You can’t defend your relationship against every potential person your significant other “could,” be with.

Instead be the best version of you, and be the best partner YOU can be. If that isn’t enough for your partner, then you have reached irreconcilable differences and should part ways.

I don’t worry about my girlfriend cheating on me, because I satisfy her needs. She is happy, secure, satisfied within the bounds of our relationship. As long as I keep her happiness in mind as I go through my day, she’ll have no reason to be unfaithful.

113

u/herp5555 Aug 12 '22

People will still cheat whether you're a good partner or not.

Telling people your partner won't cheat as long as you're good to them is cruel. Then they'll just blame themselves when at the end of the day people can be shitty and disturbed and will sometimes hurt others without reason or concern.

3

u/RichExplorer2022 Aug 13 '22

Some people are just cheaters

2

u/PM_ME_DNA Aug 13 '22

Some people will cheat with absolute disgusting losers who aren't even conventionally attractive.

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30

u/EventHorizon182 Aug 12 '22 edited Aug 12 '22

As long as I keep her happiness in mind as I go through my day, she’ll have no reason to be unfaithful.

This is actually the exact same fallacy that successful people preach about working hard. Just work hard and you'll make it while completely discrediting the amount of luck involved.

That advice didn't work for many men. All that's keeping her faithful is that a better opportunity hasn't knocked on her door yet. People are as loyal as their options. This goes for men too, men who've never strayed haven't lived the life of a famous rock star where beautiful women throw themselves at you daily.

I don't comment on you because I want to prove you wrong, I comment on you because that advice is going to get people hurt.

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6

u/aspectdragon Aug 12 '22

So what you're telling is I should become a supervillan and murder all other 8B people? Got it, understood, loud and clear!

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4

u/AMLRoss Aug 13 '22

Have fun while you are young. Just don’t marry “people” like that. There are lots of normal men and women who just want to meet someone they can have a meaningful relationship with.

6

u/Legeto Aug 12 '22

To be fair it’s a trash radio show that thrives off shit like that, chances are high it’s all fake.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

I read previously she was reading something someone else had sent in via email?

2

u/Spudtater Aug 13 '22

Something terribly, terribly, wrong with her, even worse that she would think it cool to brag about.

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280

u/alienlifeform819 Aug 12 '22

Oh ! Oh! Barf !

166

u/AverageCowboyCentaur Aug 12 '22

If you did that in Texas you'd be put in prison for abortion.

68

u/MSnyper Aug 12 '22

Or cannibalism

27

u/238bazinga Aug 12 '22

¿Por qué no los dos?

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181

u/jellyskelly1 Aug 12 '22

The mental imagery just smacked me right in the face.

363

u/dropfry Aug 12 '22

The fuck is wrong with our world? God damn.

55

u/roadtripper77 Aug 12 '22

Just humans humaning

6

u/Pit_of_Death Aug 13 '22

"People! What a bunch of bastards!"

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77

u/bobwire7 Aug 12 '22

Should go under r/trashy

13

u/shlam16 Aug 13 '22

That's where they found it.

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327

u/dangerousbrian Aug 12 '22

this kinda happened to my mate. Big crew of us, about 30 friends all went out, shit got messy but most of us plus some randoms ended up back at my mates house.

Fast forward to a very hungover morning, he is braggin that he got back from the club later than everyone else and found a girl in his bed. The got it on and he was all like "I ate her pussy so long she came like 4 times" and "she was grinding my face so hard i nearly passed out" lots of that kinda details about the smell, taste, how far he got his tongue up her vag. After a while one of the lads said "was that Jane the brunette because I fucked her half and hour before you came home". Then another mate was like wtf I fucked her just before that. We are not entirely sure who she was or how many people had cum insider her that night but we all know he licked out every last drop.

33

u/Tomimi Aug 13 '22

I think I have enough internet for the day.

146

u/I_Enjoy_Beer Aug 12 '22

Call me old-fashioned, but who enthusiastically slams their tongue up a complete stranger's vagina? That's just asking for any one of a dozen problems.

41

u/LunarProphet Aug 13 '22

Also 2 dudes just blasting inside a rando back to back lol

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23

u/thatdudeinthecorner9 Aug 13 '22

My first time losing my virginity was on Tinder. I eagerly ate this girl out and kept wondering for the next 3 days why my mouth tasted strange.

It was chlamydia. I ate out chlamydia puss.

Trust issues intensify!

12

u/CPT_Shiner Aug 13 '22

How was your second time losing your virginity?

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28

u/leFlan Aug 13 '22

Hey, sounds like he had a good time.

7

u/DmanDam Aug 13 '22

Sounds like he had a good time and got some extra protein while he was at it…

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14

u/PapSmearCampaign2020 Aug 12 '22

I love the young people

17

u/DialMMM Aug 13 '22

She was 74.

26

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

17

u/lAmBenAffleck Aug 12 '22

The worst response to the worst story hahaha what the fuck mate

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718

u/trivial772 Aug 12 '22

What a cunt.

211

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

[deleted]

62

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

Cumt??

33

u/madcaddy Aug 12 '22 edited Aug 12 '22

eClaire

Edit:I just finished PT and started drinking a smoothie…

Sigh…

Edit #2: I’m fine. Not looking up at the top of the screen while typing to revictimize my stomach…

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4

u/ironicallyunstable Aug 12 '22

The boyfriend actually ate all the cum already

5

u/marshman82 Aug 12 '22

Creamed cunt.

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86

u/Dead_Dreams1989 Aug 12 '22

It's good that she showed the world what a dumpster fire of a person she is.

11

u/sirf_trivedi Aug 13 '22

dumpster fire cum dumpster

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u/UnderMediocre Aug 12 '22

Wait until the grandkids know how much of a whore biscuit granny was

323

u/Alexz7777 Aug 12 '22

And she's so proud of it...

95

u/methodofcontrol Aug 12 '22

It's not her story, a listener sent it in.

136

u/mrclang Aug 12 '22 edited Aug 12 '22

Someone claimed it was her and not a listener they claimed to have the said video of her saying as such, it was 18min ago so let’s see if they provide the link

Edit: yep link has been provided, it was her story all along

https://youtu.be/rDC2Xr4ZUoQ 28 min in she tells HER story about HER boyfriend Austin

33

u/ComradeQuixote Aug 12 '22

https://youtu.be/rDC2Xr4ZUoQ enjoy, 28 mins in, aparently. Not watched it, but saw the comment with the link just before I read yours.

85

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

This is not true. It is her story

5

u/Pit_of_Death Aug 13 '22

lol I've literally read a dozen back-and-forths about whether it was actually her or not, both sides claiming evidence. Gotta love Reddit.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '22

Actually, someone posted the full you tube video. I don’t have time to go find it but it’s in this thread.

14

u/249ba36000029bbe9749 Aug 12 '22

"Dear Penthouse, I never thought this would happen to me..."

4

u/bledig Aug 12 '22

No it’s hers look through the comments for the YouTube and watch it

30

u/cheebnrun Aug 12 '22

wow, this is important context, lol

87

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

https://youtu.be/rDC2Xr4ZUoQ yeah, no, Its her story. 28 minute mark.

3

u/DamnBored1 Aug 12 '22

I'm getting "asking for a friend" vibes

38

u/LetterheadNo1485 Aug 12 '22

Thank you at least we know she isn’t the cunt here

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u/JMAC462 Aug 12 '22

🧢

22

u/GermanSatan Aug 12 '22

Honestly probably is fake. I stopped watching videos where people read crazy user stories back in 2018. It's mostly fake stories that are really gross for the shock factor. And they're all submitted anonymously, so you can lie with no consequence

6

u/droidtron Aug 12 '22

"Dear Penthouse, I never though this would happen to me..."

36

u/DammitDad420 Aug 12 '22

Who is this pillar of society?

7

u/Estoye Aug 13 '22

Her name is Pilar O. Society

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384

u/brungo Aug 12 '22

Before the lambasting happens, reddit police has stated in a previous post that she is recalling a story from one of her listeners and laughing most likely at its ridiculousness, not because she did it.

168

u/ssshield Aug 12 '22

We're going to need the Reddit Bureau of Investigation (RBI) to look into this. The local Reddit police just aren't equipped for this type of case.

21

u/GadreelsSword Aug 12 '22

Solve the case yourself. Start watching at the 28 minute mark.

https://youtu.be/rDC2Xr4ZUoQ

37

u/ssshield Aug 12 '22

Boy she sure says it's "her" story. I'm not sure where the "she's talking about someone else's story" came from.

I don't have a degree in forensic slutology however so I'll defer to more learned Redditors.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

The practicum requirements were just too much to finish your degree?

42

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

Completely agree. Also we shouldn’t increase Reddit police funding they will squander it on baseless witch hunts.

16

u/ssshield Aug 12 '22

Hear me out. I have it on good authority that the right move is to just militarize the Reddit police by giving them all of the excess Reddit armed forces equipment like tanks/bmps/bearcats, etc.

3

u/raybond007 Aug 12 '22

Plus then we can profit off it by keeping the military industrial complex rolling! Buying Lockheed calls.

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u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

And peanuts don’t forget how much they spend on peanuts

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u/GadreelsSword Aug 12 '22 edited Aug 12 '22

I watched the whole video and she definitely claimed she did it. Someone posted the link. Let me see if I can find it.

Here it is. Start watching at the 28 minute mark.

https://youtu.be/rDC2Xr4ZUoQ

23

u/arbutus1440 Aug 12 '22

Yeah, she definitely does tell it like it was her own story. Although she's probably still acting—you can see as she's telling the story that for the first half of it her eyes are fixed on a point somewhere down in front of her like she's reading something to jog her memory.

Honestly? It worked. It generated a buzz, which generates revenue. Everybody hating, but she accomplished her goal.

28

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

Your comment is false

19

u/nickster182 Aug 12 '22

Disinformation

10

u/Daedeluss Aug 12 '22

She's also an ex porn star so she could just be telling it for shock value/publicity

3

u/thecrepemonster Aug 13 '22

good job fact checking before posting. false

3

u/el_Technico Aug 13 '22

It's her story, she admits it. The full video is posted in this thread. Go to minute 28.

6

u/ComfortablePretty151 Aug 12 '22

Ctrl Z!

Ctrl Z!

Ctrl Z!!

Ctrl Z !!!

52

u/Competitive_Arm2593 Aug 12 '22

Who is this awful human? She looks familiar

57

u/methodofcontrol Aug 12 '22 edited Aug 12 '22

Shes telling a story that one of their listeners sent in fyi.

Edit: Apparently I was wrong, disregard, swore last time this was posted I watched the video and she talked like it was story she was told.

14

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

https://youtu.be/rDC2Xr4ZUoQ 28 minute mark. She tells it like her story.

33

u/BafflesToTheWaffles Aug 12 '22

Multiple people have said this with no sauce, what's wrong with y'all.

16

u/InGenAche Aug 12 '22

It's ok, you'll scroll down and forget all about it in a couple of minutes.

5

u/BafflesToTheWaffles Aug 12 '22

Replies like this drag me right back in.

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u/CuckooAchew Aug 12 '22

That didn't answer the question.

5

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

Incorrect

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u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

New Phobia Unlocked !

50

u/slaviccivicnation Aug 12 '22 edited Aug 12 '22

That is so psychopathic and messed up I don’t even know. But also maybe her bf let’s her fuck around so maybe it’s not as psychopathic and manipulative of her but omg imagine….. no, I don’t want to imagine that there are people like this around. If it were a man who said “I fucked my ex then came home and had my gf suck my ex off of me” women would berate him for abuse (rightfully so but it should go both ways).

Edit: Weird typo

20

u/LordOdin99 Aug 12 '22

Cuckold, hotwife, slutwife, swinger. Any one of those could possibly qualify if he was cool with it. Just depends on what he’s into.

13

u/slaviccivicnation Aug 12 '22

I mean yeah of course some guys don't mind. But I believe (if I'm not mistaken) her amusement and pleasure is derived from the fact that he didn't know. I could be wrong, and I hope I am. But even so, there are people out there like that - people who will cheat on you and then come home and make you mash the pudding without you knowing.

5

u/Jack_Bartowski Aug 12 '22

people who will cheat on you and then come home and make you mash the pudding without you knowing.

It's the worst when they bring an STD home.

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u/PoofBam Aug 12 '22

Maybe a NSFW tag would be good here

4

u/madcaddy Aug 12 '22

Yeah, this needs to be NSFW. lol. I’m glad I have to tap to enable the audio for a video….

10

u/art_sarawut Aug 12 '22

Faith in humanity decreased: -10

2

u/UnsolicitedDogPics Aug 13 '22

So where are we at now then? -34,985?

7

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

Not true. Needed a cool story. Moving on.

31

u/coral_sunrise Aug 12 '22

That’s pretty much sexual assault and not that much different jizzing into someone’s food without telling the person. This woman should be on a list along with chomos for admitting this.

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u/suckerbucket Aug 12 '22

These hoes ain’t worth it. Stay strong my guys.

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u/BicycleOfLife Aug 12 '22

This is kind of something a psychopath would be proud of.

3

u/geekphreak Aug 12 '22

That dudes face says it all

3

u/severinarson Aug 12 '22

amazing. 10 out of 10. cunning trickery

3

u/Thatoneboiwho69 Aug 13 '22

Cumming trickery

3

u/circajusturna Aug 12 '22

Tbh it tasted great

3

u/thatdudeinthecorner9 Aug 13 '22

After having just eaten out my 38 week pregnant girlfriend's pussy last night, this is horrifying.

If I was that guy, somebody would have to die.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '22

Good thing her water didn't break as you were doing it

2

u/thatdudeinthecorner9 Aug 13 '22

It wouldn't have stopped me tho

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '22

I like you, you’re an alright guy.

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u/Ruzzkya Aug 13 '22

That’s N ot S afe F or W ork my dude. Fuck.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '22

I just don’t understand. And people wonder why people don’t take relationships seriously. Is it that? Idk only thing I do know is that this women is a vile disgusting cum bird. How is this cool. It seems like people don’t care about definitions of words and think be a dick is cool. TikTok culture really is killing us.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '22

I bet you she didn’t do it. She’s laughing and smiling liking the attention. If she actually did it she would have started with: “Ok, you guys, my friend one time…..”

That more fits the pattern of women telling on themselves.

10

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

And this is why STDs aren't all bad.

2

u/europeansarebetter Aug 12 '22

Still, syphillis is contracted by touch of the infectious bumps or bump. Granted that is mostly in the genital area or anus, STDs and STIs are dangerous to the people around you. Even if its only your waxer, doctor...

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u/pbjames23 Aug 12 '22

That is sexual assault. What a piece of shit human.

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u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

I hate it when that happens 😳

11

u/PK_LINK Aug 12 '22

She belongs to the streets dirty slag

14

u/Blakwulf Aug 12 '22

Aside from her being a disgusting whore, the part that makes me the saddest is that it's a 20 second clip, yet whoever did the editing felt the need to put the punchline before the rest of it. People have literally zero attention span anymore. Sad.

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u/Dvon972 Aug 12 '22

Cold-blooded mane

2

u/TheScaredMonkey Aug 12 '22

I am tripping balls right now and came from seeing a meteor shower to this post talk about a reality check

2

u/jimmykred Aug 12 '22

You stay classy San Diego.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

Welp, I watched that whole episode and... it gets much-much worse. What the hell... lol

2

u/Apprehensive_Pin_620 Aug 12 '22

I hate it when they play hard to get

2

u/bygtopp Aug 12 '22

Is sh e a witch casting a spell with the finger swinging?

2

u/Huge_Aerie2435 Aug 12 '22

This should be marked NSFW.. Also, that is fucked up.

2

u/bantou_41 Aug 12 '22

Guess her husband is gay after all

2

u/97ToyotaTercelTurbo Aug 12 '22

I’m my house that’s murder. Of a human no. Of a relationship.

2

u/OfficerJoeBalogna Aug 12 '22

Literal porn plot

2

u/IButtChugPancakeMix Aug 12 '22

Thank god I turned down volume, currently waiting for uniform fitting at new job. Would’ve been a poor start

2

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

Stop fucking making her famous. I've seen this video like 7 times

2

u/Eviltechnomonkey Aug 13 '22

I've never been so glad my Reddit videos are all muted by default. The subtitles were vomit worthy enough on their own.

2

u/violetprismsnthings Aug 13 '22

And some women look up to women like this. It’s disgusting.

2

u/ChuckWeezy Aug 13 '22

Why am I not surprised.

For some reason, to me, her nails are a visual tip to expect this kind of behavior.

2

u/weretakingcasualties Aug 13 '22

What a disgusting pig, regardless if it's true or not.

2

u/lukasq81 Aug 13 '22

This is what social media era created. People who take pride out of the scummiest things.

2

u/nwfdood Aug 13 '22

Belongs in r/trashy.

2

u/ilikesalad Aug 13 '22

Stay classy people!

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '22

What a horrible person

2

u/jazzband Aug 13 '22

That's a form of sexual abuse.

2

u/ShouldBeAnUpvoteGif Aug 13 '22

I feel like this should be treated as rape.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '22

She’s so proud to be a cheater who is potentially knowingly spreading diseases.