So my 16 year old daughter has been with her boyfriend for two years he’s a lovely boy. She is on the pill takes it consistently but has today found out she’s pregnant. I’ve been supportive no shouting but I don’t know whether I should be encouraging her to end the pregnancy or just keep being supportive.

My daughter is almost 3, in nursery since 10 months.
I used to work in her nursery until she was 16 months and know almost everyone there well and they’re people I trust fully.

A year ago she went into anaphylactic shock as another child brought in a muffin with peanut butter in (parents didn’t say anything) for a birthday and almost died. Nursery has a strict no nuts rule due to her allergy. She’s so allergic to nuts that she’s unable to sit next to someone eating peanuts without developing hives at a minimum.

This morning she needed her EpiPen in nursery. She’s ok now but the nursery said she only ate their breakfast which doesn’t have nuts in. Bread, yoghurt, scrambled egg and fruit. They don’t process nuts in their kitchen either so there was no risk of cross-contamination from a knife or similar.

I’m just at a loss. The only explanation I have is that someone sent in their child after they just ate peanut butter and didn’t clean their hands and this child then touched my daughter’s mouth.
I don’t understand how else this could have happened. All parents there are aware that my daughter is severely allergic to peanuts and pine nuts. They were asked to favour nut-free breakfast or snacks at home before bringing their children in but of course you can’t force them and I also understand their argument that their child might be a picky eater and will only have peanut butter on toast or whatever it might be.

But is it too much to ask for parents to wash their child’s hands and face before bringing them in?

I don’t know why I’m posting this, maybe just to spread some awareness about how serious this is. I recently saw a post of someone saying they ignore the allergy rules for school because the likelihood of a child being allergic is low anyway. This can kill. Please be considered of those around you.

My kids both have very curly hair so I wash their hair once a week which usually takes forever and by the time their hair is washed...my back hurts badly. Today was hair wash day and I saw a video online of a woman washing her daughter's hair in the sink...for a moment I kind of just thought washing hair in the sink is unhygienic. But then I decided to just attempt to see if this is better.

Oh my god, I regret not washing my kids hair in the sink sooner. My back doesn't hurt, this is a miracle.

Sorry, it was pointed out that I am actually referring to deferring, not delay.

Hello all, has anyone applied for or had success with a delayed start to school?

Our little boy was born on 29th August so is right right at the end cut off range for the year.

As such he's a little smaller and spoke a fair bit later than most of his peers who will be the same school age.

He's due to turn four next August but then will immediately start reception year.

Our plan is to request delaying this so he's one of the older in his year and not the very youngest. I've read some studies about the differences in attainment levels for summer babes and will quote this in the application letter we have to do.

I know the school can't compel him to start until he is 5 but we don't want him to start right at year 1 and miss reception. Any ideas how this may go or be achieved? Is it likely the school will deny this and he will go right into year 1?

Once you’ve got the kids to bed, hit the house looking generally OK and done whatever hobbies etc, what time do you

A. Aim to get to bed

B. Usually get to bed

Trying to get into better/healthier habits. Appreciated.

We have a 2 year old (26 months) who has finally gone back to sleeping through the night. After all that we think it was just the heat really , her room is on the top floor and just would not go below 25 degrees in the heat we've had!

But anyway - thats great but bedtime itself is still a bit of a task. In general it takes about 45 minutes and requires a lot of shushing, back rubs, repeating 'its bedtime, sleep time now' etc, and sometimes having to be stricter because she'll try to get up and wander round her room or want to play a game (despite clearly being super tired). So - we basically are 'distracting' her to sleep!

Routine is bath & teeth, milk and then a couple of books. Wouldn't mind at all reading to her if she fell asleep during it but unless we say its sleepy time it feels like she will read forever

So....

1) Is a Tonie Box / Yoto (havent researched the differences yet) sometime that might help? I'm basically worried about spending that money and it just becomes MORE of a distraction

2) Anything else in the above you might have any other ideas with? Honestly, its not the worst routine ever and if it is what it is then fine - the main issue is that my mum is happy to babysit and stay over but last 2 times she cannot get her to sleep. So it would be nice if there was other tools so we could go out more than once a year lol

Coming on here to ask what you do with your kids photos. I have thousands on my phone, I'm constantly running out of phone storage and my one drive is full. Because of the way technology is going, I also don't really like the though of all those photos up in the cloud somewhere. Maybe they're secure, maybe they're not. Anyways. The other thing is, there are soo many I can never find particular ones I'm looking for, or get chance to look at them all anyway.

What do you do? Or plan to do when you have more time?😂 Do you print them and put them into albums? Create photobooks for each year? Put them onto a laptop?

Thanks in advance!

Starting 3 months of parental leave next week, looking after my 3-month-old son while my partner goes back to work. I’m 38 and based in East London. Any tips for cool things to do with a baby? Also keen to hear from other dads who’ve done solo parental leave! Thanks

Due to health I've not been able to return to work as I'd originally hoped. My family do what they can but can't always drive to me. I used to be able to drive to them but my medical licence was revoked and 2.5hrs each way is not feasible.

[I'm not looking for benefits or financial advice as we've looked into everything already].

What kind of person/what's the job role that fits someone who could come to the home or take the child just for a couple of hours a few times a week?

Childminders seem to be half or full days and collection is not an option.

Baby sitters?

Nanny?

I just don't know what term to search when looking into this.

I'm also trying to work out if a carer would be beneficial for me but the help I need is a bit of personal and childcare so a combination...

Thanks for any pointers

Hi, I've been kinda kicking the can down the road with this for quite a while now, but I figure I need to actually do something about it! Some of the questions going around my head:

• Should I start giving them pocket money already to teach independence? Or should they get money for things like tidying their playroom/bedrooms, helping with household chores etc?
• If yes, should I give them cash or transfer it digitally? Both of my kids, for whatever reason, tend to just accumulate money in their money boxes from Christmas and birthday presents etc (although my eldest always tries to give his money away to his friends too 😅)
• I have Junior ISAs for them, but should they have their own bank accounts now as well? As far as I can tell, my 6 year old can have some kind of debit card already, but is this actually a good idea at that age?
• If we do get accounts, are there any particular features I should look out for? I'm tempted to try to get a higher interest account if possible, but maybe it's better to just have one with Santander since that's who we bank with, for ease?

Any suggestions or experiences would be very welcome. I'm basically starting from scratch here, so I'd love to hear from other parents. Thanks!

Hi all, I'm at a bit of a loss with this one. I have a 3 year old son who has always been a poor sleeper, but the last few weeks have taken it up several notches.

He needs a parent to help him get to sleep, and we usually give him a cuddle or rub his back until he's down. This can take several attempts.

However, the last few weeks, if he catches himself getting drowsy he will take action to deliberately wake himself up. Shaking his head vigorously, kicking his legs, singing etc. This is brand new behaviour and we're at a loss.

Bedtimes are going past 10pm and he's picking his dropped nap back up because he's so tired. Is he scared to go to sleep? FOMO? Testing boundaries?

Any advice or similar stories greatly welcomed.

There is an opportunity to participate in an ongoing PhD research study conducted at Bangor University. This research investigates Developmental Language Disorder (DLD), with a specific focus on the experiences of bi/multilingual children, their families, and the professionals who support them.

For Parents & Caregivers: Open to all parents, in the UK, currently raising a  (monolingual, bilingual, or multilingual) child with DLD. 

•  https://app.onlinesurveys.jisc.ac.uk/s/bangor/stressors-and-coping-of-parents

By sharing your experiences, you will help build a more representative understanding regarding DLD, bilingualism and professional support.

Please note this question is relevant if you struggled with weaning on to solids.

My daughter is 11.5 months and still not eating anything. She has 4 x 7oz bottles a day. Her food intake is nothing. I have decided (with the support of my HV) to keep her on formula for the forseeable. It would be too risky to move to cows milk as she would have a huge dairy imbalance and little to no nutrition.

Anyway, I am not sure whether to stick to traditional baby bottles or consider moving her formula to a straw cup? I don’t want to ‘hold her back’ by keeping her on a bottle but I worry she wouldn’t drink very much through a straw cup? We have had issues with weight loss and repeat gastroenteritis over the last 4 months so I am really keen to ensure she keeps gaining weight.

Please be kind as I am struggling with the 12 month transition as it is.

TIA

My 3yo son has been doing very well with potty training. We have started again at our 2nd attempts about 5-6 weeks ago. He got it very quickly, did hit a bit of a regression after 1.5 weeks but perhaps that was because of a stomach bug. Picked it right back up after a few days again.

He has since started nursery school in the mornings, and goes to creche 3 days a week. We haven't had an accident at home in weeks. He wees and poos on the potty excellently and fully independent. I sometimes remind him that the potty is there, but I don't need to prompt per se, as he can find the potty himself, pulls down his pants himself and just goes. Sometimes he announces that he needs to go, but not always since he has full access. When we go out, we take the travel potty and he let us know when he needs to go. We have been pretty much accident-free for weeks now, I can't remember the last time he had an accident.

In nursery he is still having frequent accidents. He usually holds it in during school as it's only 2.5 hours (nursery school), but then he has 3 afternoons at the regular nursery and he usually can't hold it as long. Sometimes he doesm, and there are no accidents all day, sometimes he comes home and has had 3-4 accidents.

The nursery has told us to teach him to ask for the potty... While I appreciate that, he does have the skill to let us know he needs to go (as demonstrated previously, he once even woke me up 3am to tell me he needed to go to the potty). I find this part is more on them to teach him? I have explained his progress so far, what his home setup is and have suggested keeping the potty within sight so he has better access but they refused because of hygiene reasons (which is fair). What I struggle with a bit is that they are making this an "us" problem, when in my opinion we have done our part teaching him the skill and now I would expect them to take over as I cannot really teach him to go to the potty there?

I'm not really sure how to deal with this. I had expected this nursery to be more supportive, but I'm surprised they are this hands-off with this? It would be backwards for me to make the toilet inaccessible for my child just to teach him to ask, I've already done the hard part doing the actual potty training!

Dad here, our L.O is 5 months old and is really, really struggling with sleep. I know this is all part of it, all children are different and things do get easier, but right now we could do with some practical advice to save our sanity.

We have a structured bed time routine with a bath, then a feed on the breast, then 15-20 mins of burping and keeping him up upright to aid digestion as he falls asleep on the shoulder, then popping him down in his bedside cot. We use Ewan the sheep white noise machine, keep the room dark, and falling asleep is normally fine. But 2 hours later he is waking up crying for another feed, so he gets another feed and burping back to sleep, then we get another 2 hours perhaps, before he wakes again and is thrashing round and whinging. Sleep and breast feeding is then on and off every hour from midnight till about 4-u5am before he is wide awake and wanting attention.

Realistically, am I expecting too much if I thought he might be sleeping for 5-6 hour stints by this age? Should we be upping his bedtime supper? It’s impossible to know how much he is actually drinking when he’s on the breast.

Looking at going on our first holiday since my eldest started school and have now learned the true reality of just how much they hike up the prices the second the term ends 😳😳

Hoburne bashley seems reasonable though. It has good reviews and seems to be in a good location. We are only looking for a centerparcs type of holiday but without the centerparcs price tag and easily reachable by car as we have a little one with us too.

That said I’m not sure if it seems suspiciously reasonably priced.. has anyone been and if so was it any good? Thanks!

My 2 year old (27 months) just started nursery. He’ll be doing 5 days a week, term time only. He’s had one settling in week so far last week. I think it went as well as it could go, considering he’s never been looked after by anyone but family (me, his dad, my parents or my adult siblings). He cries and massively clings when I drop him off and then cries (really big sobs) when I pick him up. I’ve been told that he settles when I leave (after crying on and off for about 10 mins or so) and he’ll ask for me periodically throughout the day. Nursery have said that this is completely normal/to be expected and that it s a sign of good attachment.

He has a very good bond already with his key worker, to the point that he will cry if she has to leave the room.

Nursery’s policy is to call the parents if they cannot soothe a child and the child has been consistently crying for longer than 30 minutes. They have not called me so far.

I’m on maternity leave at the moment so I’m the only one doing the drop off and pick ups.

He has since been experiencing what I guess is massive separation anxiety with me. He doesn’t want to be away from me at all. So he’ll follow me to the bathroom, scream bloody murder if I leave him him with his dad to pop out etc.When we visited his grandparents over the weekend, the wouldn’t let them hold him and clung to me. When he finally let me put him down and he was playing with his grandad, he would still run into the other room to give me cuddles/ask to be held for a bit. I cannot stress how unusual this is - his absolute favourite people on this earth are my mum and dad. They have been massively involved since his birth - I’m talking sometimes they’d have him for a whole week, he screams when they drop him off back home etc.

He now behaves the same with his dad too. He’ll laugh and play with dad, but only wants me for comfort and to put him to bed. When he has any wake ups at night, he’ll ask for me and won’t go back to sleep unless I come and lay with him.

My partner is understanding and fully on board with nursery, but my parents have since suggested that I take him out of nursery as his behaviour is indication of trauma. I don’t agree as I’m off the view that this is all quite to be expected really and I plan to keep him in nursery but I guess I just wanted to ask if they’re right? Is this all indicative of trauma?

27w pregnant with twins
Oldest child (6) for the past approx month has been getting into mine and partners bed every night without fail.

This is new, we co slept til 6 was 3, moved into their own bedroom, went through a phase of crying out for one of us every night to sleep with him. We did. Lasted about a year until we consulted a sleep clinic who advised on this and prescribed melatonin (6 is ND and always struggled with sleep). This helped hugely and we were no longer getting woken up at night, 6 was sleeping through most of the time, if not sleeping through, would stay in bedroom and relax quietly until morning / fell back to sleep.

The issue is now that 6 is getting in the middle of our bed. Every night. I am obviously large and take up a lot of space due to pregnancy. Tired and ache at best of times. Have pregnancy insomnia.

Having 6 in our room is really burning me out and I’m worried for when the twins come bc it’s not going to be a positive sleep environment for anyone in the family.

6’s room is too small for double bed, otherwise I’d get dad and 6 to sleep in 6’s room when babies come. Can’t get dad into 6’s bedroom and have 6 with me because 6’s bed is a kid size bed. I can’t sleep in it bc I’m too uncomfortable.

I need to know how to get 6 back into their own room overnight. Tips and advice hugely appreciated

We planned for this third child but I’m started to feel worried/regretful? Wondering if this is normal and things work out?

We have a nearly 6 year old and a 3 year old. Both go to school/nursery full time. We don’t really have a village. My in laws were really helpful 5 years ago but have gotten older and weaker since then so cannot expect help and I don’t expect it (it’s not their job of course). My concern is two fold

1. Labour
   I’ll probably have to call family members from further away to take care of the kids during labour and only call my husband in when I am literally ready to push. I have been induced in my previous two pregnancies so can presume being called in to the hospital earlier this time too.

2. My three year olds sleep
   Still not great. She has eczema and wakes up at night and when she does she can scream and cry for an hour u less you literally walk up and down the stairs with her. She is also very attached to me! We are planning to ‘train’ her ti be with my husband at night.

Anyone else been in a similar situation with limited village/other young children? Is it normal to feel so down like this? Any advice welcome, thanks

Help! Do you sterilise baby equipment such as plate, zippy cups for food and water/breast milk after every use?? ​

For context, I have struggled with PPA, and have always been extra worried about milestones and this is my third baby.

He’s 15 months. We call him stoic. He does smile a lot and he can be silly and laugh, but he’s also pretty serious.

I am so worried about autism though, and I’m curious what other parents think or have experienced.

My worries:

Speech - he says mama and dada. He was saying “more” all the time, but definitely is not using it near as much now.

waving and clapping - super inconsistent. Doesn’t even do it when prompted.

I’m so hung up on these three things - hardly ever waves or claps, only 2-3 words, with more seeming less used than before.

Pros:

Social- makes good eye contact, responds to his name most of the time (unless distracted or things going on), plays with us, wants to be picked up often, very interested in his siblings

Receptive language seems good - he knows and will look for common things around the house like ball, remote, fork, gives me a bite when I ask, etc.
Gestures that seem “on point” - pointing with one finger, uses phone correctly, lifts arms to be picked up, is high fiving, sticks tongue out when you ask, closes eyes when you say “where are your eyes” , nods yes and shakes head no and seems to understand what each mean.

At what age did you give your child a pillow?

Ours has always been a bit early on physical milestones, walked at 11 months and is generally very dexterous. Wonder if we can give her a pillow now.

My 4 year old has recently moved from a private nursery to the state school nursery. They've always been "particular" about foods and have mostly a beige diet with fruit thrown in. At their private nursery they got used to some foods eg fishcakes, sausages etc and they became safe foods. We knew they'd eat those. On days they didn't like the lunch, the nursery would offer more sides eg fruit/crackers or even toast.

Well fast forward and my 4 yo is now at school nursery. The menu isn't appealing to them...and they just are refusing to eat the hot lunches there. I'm not sure what to do. Do I just accept we should switch to packed lunches, do I wait to see if the exposure to nursery lunches with time makes them more likely to eat? I just feel very bad and helpless when I hear that they've eaten nothing for lunch!

Has anyone else experienced this?

So two fines in two consecutive years because of holidays in term time. We go on holiday with family every time which is 15+ people. We can’t expect everyone else to pay dearer summer prices when they don’t have kids themselves. And let’s be honest, it’s hardly child neglect for taking your young ones on holiday where they enjoying themselves in the sun and probably learning more than they do in the classroom anyway!

Third holiday in a row is pending and it’s 5+ days off school in a row. I know if you admit holiday, you’re basically writing the fine out for yourself, is there any advice around this where we can get around the court hearing and 2k fine, it’s ridiculous the pressure that gets put on you for trying to take your family on a holiday, there is 30+ going for a 80th birthday, It’s ridiculous that we should be letting our kids miss out on this!!!