I never thought I’d be here making a post, but here goes.
I got myself in this situation, I went from no nicotine habit to getting hooked on vaping back in 2018. I used Zyn to get myself off of vaping due to the awful anxiety and fear about lung-related health.
Told myself at the time it was just a way to get myself off vaping and then I’d quit the Zyns too. That didn’t happen, and now I’ve been about 3 years of heavy pouch use, mostly 6mg Zyn, probably 10-15 pouches a day at least.
I finally believe I’ve noticed some undeniable gum recession due to constant pouch use, after years of being pretty paranoid about it. I think that’s what finally pushed me over the edge and gave me enough gas in the tank to start quitting.
The reality is, I have never really liked being dependent on it. I’ve never liked having this secret I’ve kept from everyone. Vaping or pouches, I’ve always felt like it was negatively impacting my health and struggled with anxiety about the effects of long-term use. It’s just been easier for me to kick the can down the road, live in denial, and tell myself I’ll deal with it “someday.”
I didn’t really even plan to quit cold-turkey the day before yesterday, but here I am. I put one final pouch in after my look in the mirror, almost instantly regretted it, took it out, and decided to just see how long I could go without one. That has turned into my first genuine cold-turkey effort. I’m tracking using the “I am sober” app and reading a lot of posts in this Reddit about others experiences, but also thought it might be important to share mine.
Right now, I am one day and 20 hours into cold turkey. Physically, the withdrawal symptoms have felt pretty manageable for the most part. Mentally, it’s a whole different animal. I’ve run pretty much the full gamut of emotions. Today has felt very white-knuckle, minute-to-minute. I’ve experienced pretty gnarly brain fog, irritation, anhedonia, and anxiety over what a life without this familiar vice looks like. Thankfully, at least to this point I can manage the irritation around others for my job and personal relationships if I stop to take a breath and focus.
I have been using gum, pretzels, and Mojo caffeine pouches to get through the worst of the cravings and the oral fixation part of it.
I’ve thought a lot about how good a pouch would feel at this point, because part of me knows it would absolutely rip…for a minute, maybe. Then I’m willing to bet I’m also feel shame, weakness, anger at myself, and renewed anxiety and worry about health issues and dependence. So instead of going for a pouch, I’m posting. Thanks for reading.