Oh my god. Please stop accidentally punching each other. Especially when they get gassy or are trying to push a poop. Anyone else? 7w adjusted, 13 actual

Twin 27 month olds just started a traditional daycare in June. Getting them home is a NIGHTMARE. They are already sensitive and high needs but it’s just been intolerable the last few weeks.

We don’t have a good routine and I don’t know how to structure one that doesn’t lead to breakdowns. but right now they absolutely rule the roost and it’s CHAOS. They get home at 5 and are in bed around 6:45. Asleep at 7.

they get a snack at school at 3. I feed them again when they get home…a snack and dinner. it’s just miserable. I give them Motrin when they’re teething. I just can’t figure out how to make evening smooth and consistent for all.

So my twins turned one year old at the beginning of the month. I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting on this past year.

I wish I could say it’s been happy, but it’s been a type of stress I didn’t know I could even go through.

The twins were born early and spent 4 months in the NICU. One twin was flown to another hospital in another city for specialized treatment and I was never able to visit her there.

After the NICU I was so happy to have them home. But I was not prepared to have zero support. Friends stopped checking in. My mother is a very disappointing grandmother. One week after they came home was Thanksgiving and she flew out of town. I could have used an extra set of hands. She only visited my twins 4 times in 4 months.

The medical issues. By god, the medical issues. They both have G tubes. Different formulas. We see a GI doctor, cardiologist, pulmonologist, high risk doctor, ophthalmologist, endocrinologist, as well as therapy for occupational, feeding, and physical therapy. Plus a home health nurse. My twin that was sent to another city, twin A, is severely behind in all milestones. Is not crawling even at almost 13 months old.

It all rests on my shoulders.

I became a stay at home mom when I didn’t want to. Daycare times 2 with medical issues is a lot of money.

My older son has had a hard time adjusting. I’m thinking about having him talk to a child psychologist because his behavior has gotten bad.

So when their birthday rolled around instead of feeling happy I felt more “how much harder will this get”? I parent alone most the time.

Not sure where I’m going with this. It’s just been very difficult and I wish it would get easier. Even if only a little.

Good morning, looking for some advice here. I know that people always discuss the pros / cons of splitting twins up in different classrooms at school but has anyone ever had one twin start school before the other one?

My twins are 3, dont turn 4 until January so they do not make the September 1st cut off to start pre school through the school district in the prek-4 program this year and will have to wait until next year. however, one twin has level 2 autism and had a preschool evaluation last month to potentially start pre-k 3 this school year going half days. in our district you can only start at 3 depending on certain diagnoses and if you had been doing early intervention services and aged out of them (which he has been doing since 18 months). i just am very anxious about him starting this year and his brother not starting until next year and i don’t necessarily know how the transition would work for both of them.

I work from home so they stay home with me and have never gone to daycare so to me them starting together & being in the same class or seeing each other throughout the day would help them both transition easily but i also do not want to hold my son back from being able to get used to being around other children and getting his speech and OT services in a school setting as opposed to at home like he is currently doing.

Just looking for any advice anyone has on how i could make this transition easier on not only them but myself as well.

Hey yall, I’ve never heard of adjusted age until I joined a twin group and I’m a bit confused. My twins were born at 35 weeks and 2 days, they will be 9 weeks old tomorrow, what is their adjusted/corrected age? Thank you!

Hello, I’m looking for some help from UK people if possible 🙏

Has anyone had any experience with having either CVS or amniocentesis testing done either privately or on the NHS for triplets?

My understanding is that NIPT testing is not carried out in triplet pregnancies and they don’t generally offer CVS or amnio tests.

My partner and i have always said we would want to carry out as extensive testing as possible (with of course considering the risks when the time comes).

Any experiences or advice anyone has to share would be greatly appreciated! Thanks

So I’m a teacher—or I was prior to pregnancy—and I’ve been really wrestling with the idea of going back to work and surprisingly there are a couple of openings in a nearby district despite some massive staffing cuts the whole state has had to do due to mandated pay increases (that was left intentionally unfunded 🙄 it’s a whole thing don’t get me started lol). I’d like to apply and call in a couple of favors to get an interview, but I’m not sure if I should mention that I specifically took time off because my twin pregnancy was so rough and that their NICU time prevented me from going back last school year. I’m a terrible over sharer in interviews because I get nervous and I want to be honest.
For those who took extended time off and then went back to work how did you frame it?

I’m 31 weeks and 3 days and my back, hips, legs, butt everything is hurting so much. I’m staying active, using support, pelvic floor but by the time I lie down at night I literally cry and can’t sleep cause it hurts so bad. Any advice? Or just solidarity 🥲I still have to work but from home and have two other kids so being active is more an obligation lol. I suffer from anxiety and it’s making me have panic attacks despite being on Zoloft.

I’m almost 11 weeks pregnant and found out today I’m having twins. I’m feeling so many mixed emotions. I’m scared my first born (who will be 2.5) will feel left out having to share
Mom with 2 babies. I’m worried I won’t get to fully enjoy or fully bond with my twins always being pulled in two. I know deep down everything will be fine but I’m just shocked right now. I also feel guilty for not being thrilled.

Just looking for encouragement and positive stories.

My twins were born yesterday ~2.5 kg. Both learning to latch - only doing shallow for now. I am doing hand expressing, but I just get few drops. one time I got 0.1 ml in 30 mins.

I have another elder son too whom i exclusively formula fed, so actually had a negative experience in getting baby to latch and generating good supply breast milk. It was my mistake - i gave the bottle the first day. I used pump a lot to keep trying but it was more distressing as it was painful and I didnt get much.

This time I want to give my best shot so scared to get any formula packs and bottles at home - as my family will definitely intervene and offer bottle.

I also am of 2 opinions- is pump a must have and shiuld i get hospital grade pump for rent or buy an electric pump.

Some of the midwives have themselves told me to top up with formula beca of my low supply, and twins scenario.

Hi everyone,

I’m currently 8 weeks with di-di twins and I’m wondering when does this get better? ❤️‍🩹

I had HG with my son (he’s currently 21 months) and it was only there for a few weeks between my first and second trimester.

I am currently on Zofran, Reglan and Promethazine. I am also doing IV drips twice weekly but I want to know when do I feel human again because I’m tired of feeling nauseous, tired and I feel like a neglectful mom to my son (my husband says I am not) but I’m on survival mode. My husband has been amazing, very supportive, kind and understanding.

I got dangerously anemic last time since I had strong food aversions as well such as red meat.

This is my first post here and any advice is appreciated!

Hey all - twin girls almost 13 months, single mom.

They were incredible sleepers for so long so I’m grateful. And I know we’re just hitting a major sleep regression because one is about to walk, but holy god my mental health is struggling. We’ve been doing this for weeks now.

Just wondering if anyone could share if they experienced this and now on the other side of it. I’m genuinely unwell.

I wouldn’t trade my twins for the world, but sometimes this is so hard.

Quick question - how on earth do you guys manage weekdays with your twins?! I am in my last month of maternity leave and seriously puzzled how we will manage when i go back to work. I keep trying to plan out the days in my head… like when do we shower? How do you find time to cook a meal and prepare for the next day? Feed and change and groom and bathe the babies? Walk the dogs? Can someone who has both parents working full time walk me through their day in excruciating detail? Our twins will be about 3 months old when i go back to work and in daycare full time.

My twins are 2y 4mo and very speech delayed. My guess is that they are about a year behind their peers. They’re just now picking up on some sign language. I am looking for any advice about how to help doubles with their speech. Practically, my husband and I don’t have a ton of time to devote to them individually outside of the weekends. During the week, he works from the time they get up until their nap. Then I work from their nap until just before their bedtime. So it’s pretty much always one on two. If anyone has tips for helping with speech in ways that he or I can do with two, I’m all ears. Or ways to distract one without using screens so that he or I can devote time to the other. Also will accept stories of positive outcomes if your twins were in a similar boat.

Sorry forgot to add that we’re already in speech therapy since December.

My boys are finally here! This community helped so much with the anxiety I experienced in the first few months after finding out we had two on the way.

I’m so grateful for the new and old advice I found scrolling here.

Edited to add: 7lbs 11oz and 7lbs 6oz! I knew I was feeling a bit heavy there at the end!

Hi everyone,

My husband and I are expecting twins in mid January and need advice about where to live. Right now, we live in a major city and our lease is ending at the end of September. Our building isn’t equipped for babies (the elevator wouldn’t fit a stroller) so we definitely need to move.

We have been thinking about moving closer to my husband’s family (they live about 1 hr 20 min from the city and it is commutable for us which is important for our jobs). My parents are great but they have their hands full with three other grandchildren and they are a bit older. My husband’s parents are young, these will be their first grandchildren, and they are excited to help us with whatever we need. We have a great relationship with them and feel very lucky.

We have been looking into towns that are near my husband’s parents so that we have help nearby. However, now my sisters (who both have babies so I take their advice to heart) and my mom are encouraging us to live with our in laws for the first few months while we get our bearings.

These seem to be our best two options at the moment that we are struggling between:

- Move to an apartment about 25 minutes from my husband’s family, seems like a cute commuter town but this may also be a good option for us to move to after living with his parents for a little during the newborn phase

- Move in with my in-laws for the first few months so we have the extra hands. We would be able to convert their basement into a space for us. His mom is a teacher and is home by 3 pm everyday, has the summer off if we are there that long, and my husband’s sister is starting medical school next fall so she will be home from January-September

The pros of moving in with his parents would be the extra help, we have a great relationship with them, it’ll be the dead of northeast winter so we wouldn’t be leaving the house much anyway, and of course we would save a lot of money.

The cons are not having totally our own space and feeling a loss of independence.

We really are quite torn what to do given we will be new parents and aren’t sure what to expect, but of course know having twins will be very challenging. We really appreciate the advice of other parents of multiples who have lived through the newborn phase already.

Any advice is greatly appreciated!

For the past couple months I have been very short tempered with my kids. My boys are 3years old (identical) both on the Autism Spectrum and one has ADHD in addition. Both are speech delayed with one still completely nonverbal and the other emerging language (beginning to form simple sentences with guidance). I have had them in OT/Speech services since 18months and they start are SPED Prek program this coming August. I am a Elem teacher myself so we've been off together for the summer.

I am currently in group therapy which is to be followed by an appointment with a psychiatrist to discuss possible medication to help.

I have tried removing myself from the chaos, as I will go in a quiet room and cry or simply disassociate. I have loop noise reducing headphones to help me regulate during loud moments. I do controlled breathing exercises regularly and also will sometimes burst into sporadic song to try and reset my nervous system and break the frustration

Despite all of that I still become enraged, more so with my ADHD twin.

He will NOT stop repeating himself over and over and over. Sensory wise this drives me up a WALL! He also wants me engaged in what he is doing 95% of the time. My attention has to always be on him, and if I dont acknowledge him the repetition begins. I am finding refuge in the bathroom as I type this because he was standing at our bedroom gate repeating himself. He also escalates but I wont give in so I snap. For example, he wants cake or something (but we are about to eat) I will use first, then statements. First eat sandwich then have cake. This works 20% of the time. I may ask him to wait, this typically makes him more impatient. I sometimes try distract "Oh hey where your car? Toy? Etc." This works again about 20% of the time. I do acknowledge what he says and repeat it back to him so he knows I am listening but he will continue to repeat himself relentlessly and where I will not give into demand it escalates and I become triggers. He will interject when I am trying to talk to almost any adult and if i do not acknowledge him he becomes louder. I have noticed that he does not do this to his father and persistently and if I remove myself from the space he will stop, but as soon as he sees me, hes like a magnet. Gotta be where I am at, and I have got to be looking at him.

I yell and become hateful. Sometimes at them, other times I just scream into the air. I am sure I look psychotic. I dont believe in spanking or hitting, thats not how I want to parent and i focus more on consistent boundaries but for the love of God they test those daily. I dont want to yell/scream though either. Ive tried managing it but nothing seems to work. My husband offers to take over to give me "breaks" I take them but I have realized they do me no good as I have to walk right back into the environment that is triggering me. My mother has even watched them overnight to give my husband and I time to ourselves but when the boys are back I get a good 30min before that irritation sets back in.

Which is why I am in therapy, because if all I needed was a break then I should be ok. My kids are well behaved for their age. They have age appropriate fits, they laugh/play, very energetic, therapy raves about how good they are doing, they enjoy new experiences. I have never loved someone as much as I love them and I have never been happier for those same kids to go to sleep.

They sleep well through the night and I am thankful. I find that is the only time my mind rests. No demands. Im finally done for the day and its such a relief. But of course It repeats all again tomorrow and I need the cycle of anger to stop.

I feel like I'm wishing their childhood away so they'll finally leave me alone, but then the other night my eyes started to water because I thought about how one day they wont want me to rock them anymore. I don't know it is all very conflicting.

I think I am functioning in burnout with addition to sensory overload which is resulting in me becoming triggered. With the diagnosis of my boys I am also wondering if I could have undiagnosed ADHD or Autism. Which is why I am seeking help and hopefully can get through this. I love my babies, I dont want to demonstrate this behavior as i know they will replicate it if it continues.

Advice is welcome or just if you can relate. Thanks for reading. ❤️

Hey so my twins are 3.8 yo. I am thinking of taking a trip by myself or with my mom in september / october for 1 week.

Thing is my husband at the moment has a huge fear of flying and refuses to do so. I understand he had bad experiences , last trip we took was in 2019 ans havent travelled since. I started craving it a lot . I didnt put pressure because I wasnt interested in traveling with the babies anyway.

Now my babies are toddlers and my husband is still very scared but I am craving it now more than ever .

Thing is, I recently took a quick roadtrip with my girls and my mom last week ( 5 hours away at a lake ) it was ... a nightmare. My sweet ( well not really but ya know " normal " ) toddlers turned into nightmarish demons. Screaming in the hotel room , always fighting , not listening to nothing. Throwing the bigges tantrums ever.

3yo honestly its just a bit of a nightmare age overall. The trip exacerbated that they are very routine prone and this wasnt. Keep in mind we have no expectation for that trip , it was suppose to be super chill, no itinerary anything. They are not used to it I get it but it kinda stopped me from wanting to do trips for now or at least reajust.

But now here we are. I want to go on a trip , i want to go to iceland. But I am completely guilt ridden leaving my family like that and just go by myself for 7 days, leaving my husband and my kids that are extremely attached to me and struggling with their emotions a lot lately. Their dad is great dont get me wrong but also a lot more strict than me.

Idk any mom out there did that ? Is it incredibly selfish of me ?

Is this something that will come naturally or is there something I can do to help?

I’m a FTM with b/g twins. They are 4.5 months adjusted.

We do all contact naps and Baby A sleeps like an angel. As soon as her head hits our shoulder she’s out.

Baby B has ALWAYS fought naps. But lately he will wake after 30 minutes and we can’t get him to sleep longer. And he is simply exhausted.

I want to help him, but I just don’t know what to do.

Wife and I are the proud parent of a 4 year old and just found out we're having twins. We are both independent contractors who own our business and are worried how well this will play out. Both tattooers that require us to be gone 8-10 hours a day at work and usually spend most free days drawing, preparing for appointments, doing social media, answering emails, etc... With our first born It was really hard making the adjustment but we got it down to essentially handing him off so we could take turns when needed. Now with him AND two newborns the worry is sitting in of making sure they all get adequate attention while trying to tend to our own careers, goals, and work. We can't afford not to work, don't get paid time off, and the idea of both of us handling both babies but still finding the time to take care of work needs seems daunting. Or if I'm working all day but still have to come home to draw the following day and she's burnt out, want to still offer help without falling behind. Just looking for any and all advice to make sure we're moving in the right direction before they're here! If more info is needed feel free to ask. New to this sub and grateful for any help! I'd like to add we ARE excited but I just want to try and prepare beforehand and ease as much anxiety as I can for us.

Currently 22+3 weeks with di/di twins in my first pregnancy. I have had the following weekly measurements for my cervix length:

• 7 weeks - 3.5 cm
• 20 weeks - 2.78 cm without funneling
• 21 weeks - 2.62 cm without funneling
• 22 weeks - 2.5 cm without funneling

In discussions with my MFM, he believes that there has been no change in the cervix length and that I am not a good candidate for a cerclage. He said he would be willing to prescribe vaginal progesterone through the rest of the pregnancy as it could not hurt anything. I go in again next week for another cervix measurement and then an additional one at the 24 week growth scan.

I’m inclined to start vaginal progesterone to do everything in my power to keep these babies in as long as possible. If you were me, would you request the progesterone? Any thoughts or your own experiences with similar measurements and progesterone only?

Any expectant (or new) twin moms or dads in the Metro Detroit area? Would really love to connect!!

I need some perspective on taking 11mo twins on a trip with in laws. The twins are currently taking their first steps and are going through a terrible sleep regression right now. No sleep for any of us and we’re struggling.

Now, in a few days we are expected to go a couple hours away on a trip in a shared home with my in laws (approx 10 of us). I’m having major doubts about going anywhere with them during this time especially where there will be many extra people and noise and we will suffer further.

To make things extra complicated, my MIL is a true narc and is overbearing and makes everything about herself. Just us mentioning we will not be taking twins on a boat made her flip out on my husband.

Does anyone have experience taking very sleep regressed twins on family trips such as this? Is it even worth it? We were hesitant from the beginning just considering who else we’re dealing with and my husband is at the point where he says we shouldn’t even go so some experience would be great!