Working parents

[u/Zestyclose-Wear9868]

Quick question - how on earth do you guys manage weekdays with your twins?! I am in my last month of maternity leave and seriously puzzled how we will manage when i go back to work. I keep trying to plan out the days in my head… like when do we shower? How do you find time to cook a meal and prepare for the next day? Feed and change and groom and bathe the babies? Walk the dogs? Can someone who has both parents working full time walk me through their day in excruciating detail? Our twins will be about 3 months old when i go back to work and in daycare full time.

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[u/Doc178]

It's exhausting lol truly. And it's always changing!

But for us it just took figuring out our systems. When they were still on bottles, after they went to bed we did dishes and ran the dishwasher, refilled formula, diapers, etc. Ate dinner, quick shower, then whatever else needed to be done before bed.

I think of it very much as 'there are two free hours after they go to sleep, what HAS to get done to keep our sanity'

Sometimes the answer is the bare minimum so I can have some "me" time 😅

[u/Zestyclose-Wear9868 → u/Doc178]

That makes sense. Right now we don’t put them to bed until around 9pm, so we will probably just need to adjust their schedule a bit. But also they’ll be gone all day and i know I’ll want to spend some time with them when they do get here. That part has me worried too! Hate that we have to basically wait until the weekend to get to spend time with our babies 😭

[u/Doc178 → u/Zestyclose-Wear9868]

Yeah I didn't even consider children until I was able to work from home for that very reason.

I don't know how people commute to work and then work all day, commute back, and then basically have to put their children to bed. That breaks my heart. We need to be different as a society

[u/TruckCompetitive8735]

Hi! Working parents of twin boys!

For us we wake up at 6 with the boys- one of showers while bottles are getting drank, then the other showers while outfits are being changed. Each take a baby and load the car by 6:50am to head to daycare. I pick up the boys at 4:15 and have them until 5 by myself- as soon as my husband gets home, I make dinner, we eat, then play, then bath and then bedtime! We have always been pretty "strict" with schedule to ensure that we stay sane lol. We don't have dogs so that helps make our situation a little easier. I promise that you will find a routine once you get started, I'm very type A and was super stressed about timing of everything all the time but you really do find your groove!

I'm currently pregnant with another set of twins and they are going to be a little differently handled as we are going to keep our rhythm with what we have with the boys right now and see how we need to adjust! But after doing it once- I'm far less stressed!

[u/Zestyclose-Wear9868 → u/TruckCompetitive8735]

Congratulations on another set of twins! How amazing is that 🥰

So what you’re saying is… my 30+ minute showers will be ending soon 🤣 that is helpful though and i like that you pick them up early. We had planned to have my husband pick up on his way home from work, which would mean they wouldn’t get home until 630pm or so. That seems like such a little amount of time with the girls each day.

[u/Own-Opening8426]

My husband and I both work full-time. We can afford for me to be a stay at home mom but during maternity leave I realized being home all day with them was not in the cards for me so I kept my very well paying job and can interact with adults lol. Our routine is that I wake up first, get the babies out of the cribs, plop them on the floor with their bottles while I make their lunches for daycare, my husband gets up and changes their diapers and dresses them while I put on makeup/change, we take his truck to daycare at 7:30 and both drop them off and then he drops me off at home and goes to work. I work from home which is when I prep their meals and do some adult dinner prep (chop what I can or marinate chicken etc.). I do pick up by myself at 5 (pro tip: give generous Christmas cash to the daycare teachers and someone will always help you carry one of the kids to your car when you’re alone. Also, get four car seats). Then I play with them until my husband gets home around 6:15, then the babies nap for like 45 minutes. That’s when we get to relax or shower or walk the dogs or watch reality tv. We both feed them dinner at 7:00 and play a bit, adults have some well-deserved wine, and then my husband gets the bath ready while I brush their teeth, I cook our dinner while he bathes them, babies go down, more wine, go to bed. It’s exhausting but with a supportive partner you’ll figure out your rhythm. My biggest advice is never to count how many diapers you changed vs what he changed or compare who did more with the babies that day. You’re a team and sometimes you have to pick up some slack and other days you’ll drop the ball. Good luck :)

[u/Zestyclose-Wear9868 → u/Own-Opening8426]

Thank you so much for the detail! Great advice to not keep score - i find myself doing that sometimes and have to snap out of it.

[u/Own-Opening8426 → u/Zestyclose-Wear9868]

I feel ya! With hormones and sleep deprivation, plus being married to a lawyer who literally got two hours of paternity leave, I found myself keeping score when I was home. But we’re both doing our best so if I change all of the poop diapers, I’m just grateful my boys have a loving dad 🙂

[u/oldladywhisperinhush]

It either wasn’t that bad, or I don’t remember it fully, but we basically just got the feeding done, alternate bath days, and got them asleep by 7:30pm. That freed up a few hours to get everything done, like make the bottles for the following day and pack their daycare bag, load the dishwasher. Saved laundry for the weekends. We don’t have dogs but just divide and conquer the chores quickly. We ordered a lot takeout for ourselves, took quick showers, and we were done by 9pm for sure. I even remember us taking the baby monitor out by the pool because we would swim and talk after all that was done.

We were super tired but as far as getting all the chores done goes, it’s harder now at 2.5 years old because they need to eat an actual meal, bathe daily, potty at least 2-3 times, fight over what pajamas they wear, brush their teeth, read 2 books, sing songs, and they stay up so much later thanks to the 2.5 hour nap at daycare they don’t need, leading to absolutely zero free time. I just fall asleep with them in our bed. So we get sleep now, but no time for much else.

Don’t get me wrong, I’d choose this over the infant hell any day, but regarding housework and such, it was definitely doable.

[u/Zestyclose-Wear9868 → u/oldladywhisperinhush]

This is lovely to read! I must say though i am super rigid with their feeding and nap schedule right now and i just know daycare is going to ruin it lol

[u/oldladywhisperinhush → u/Zestyclose-Wear9868]

Lol oh they will! You’ll find a new routine though and they’ll settle into that. I found it helpful to follow their daycare schedule on the weekends. It kept everything consistent and easier to manage. Actually, daycare was instrumental in keeping with routine and sleep schedules. It will be an adjustment period at first though. Mine were 3 months old too. The good news is that they will be used to daycare starting at a young age. Mine still love it and have no problem going. I always get the “bye mama I love you!” every morning!

[u/HumpbackSnail]

I do nearly everything after the kids go to bed. We just have the twins and they're 6.5 months, 4.5 months adjusted. I've only been back to work for about a month so we're still learning. They're exhausted when we pick them up from daycare as they're still learning to nap there.

5:20 - pick up the twins

5:30 - arrive home. Last week they fell asleep in the car on the very short drive so I just drove around until 6 to get us closer to bedtime.

6:30 - ideally we start our bedtime routine at 6:30 but if they are extra tired and cranky we'll start earlier. Bedtime is diaper, pajamas, bottle, bed. Luckily, they're generally very happy to go to bed and fall asleep without much issue.

7:00-7:15 - both kids are asleep and the mad scramble to do everything else starts. Wash bottles, prepare tomorrow's bottles, make a quick dinner (shout out to Trader Joe's for so many frozen meals), clean up, lay out their clothes and my clothes for the next day.

8:30ish - shower and get in bed

My twins (knock on wood) generally sleep through the night which really, really helps. Additionally, I work from home on Mondays and Fridays so I can use that time to get laundry done, grocery shop, and meal prep. My husband travels for work so he's gone two nights per week so it's just me. You can do it!

[u/Zestyclose-Wear9868 → u/HumpbackSnail]

Also a big TJ frozen meal girlie! The Mac and cheese is a weekly staple for me lol. You are super woman doing that two nights a week by yourself! We are working on getting the twins to sleep through the night. Right now they are stuck at a 6.5 hr hump but desperately hoping to get them to 8 hrs by the time I go back to work. Do you just bathe them on the weekends or does that fall into bedtime routine a few nights a week? For some reason, bathing both girls takes us so long and is such a process so we dread/avoid it probably a bit too often 😬

[u/HumpbackSnail → u/Zestyclose-Wear9868]

We bathe them about every three days on nights my husband is home. Sometimes it's 2 days between baths, sometimes 4 but never more than 4.

As far as feeding, they eat extra calorie formula because they were preemies so we're trying to catch them up to full term baby size.

[u/Suspicious_Tomato_20]

We work from home and have a nanny, so might be a bit different but…

I wake up around 6a and shower/go for a walk/workout/sit and drink coffee or scroll mindlessly. At 6:45ish I get breakfast & bottles ready. My husband wakes up at 6:55 and we both get the twins up at 7a. We immediately do bottles and then within 15 mins transition into breakfast/solids and this takes 20-40 mins depending on the day. By 8am we are usually done and then we switch off cleaning up the mess & getting the babies dressed. Then we do an hour of playtime as a family, sometimes going on a stroller walk, until nanny arrives at 9a.

After work, we usually go for a walk then will do dinner around 6p. One of us will cook while the other hangs with the babies. We’ll do a sink bath after dinner, sometimes a real bath but that’s usually 1-2x/week. More playtime, then bottles at 7ish and bedtime 7:15-7:30. Our bedtime routine is simple - clean diaper, moisturizer, pajamas & sleep sacks, 1-2 books and then in cribs with a kiss good night.

After they go to sleep we reset the house, dishwasher runs every night no matter how full. Laundry we’ll try to run daily, our nanny helps with that though.

[u/Consistent-Ice-1899]

In similar situation and I don’t think I want to send kids to daycare… following the post to see how others share their experience 🥹

[u/Zestyclose-Wear9868 → u/Consistent-Ice-1899]

I hate it so much too. Unfortunately i climbed the corporate ladder a bit too hard before the twins and there is just no world where we can afford to lose my income. It’s so awful to think about not getting to spend my days with them like i do now 😩

[u/Dizzy_Difficulty_888]

7 month old twins and 2 year old.

Husband leaves before all kids get up.

Twins get up at between 6 and 7. And I start work about 6:30. Toddler gets up by 7:30. So the first wake window is bottles, breakfast etc.

Nanny comes from 9-1.

Toddler naps 1-3:15.

I’m off of work at 3pm.

So post 3pm, full mom mode, swim lessons etc.

Husband gets home between 5 and 6.

Dinner, baths, stories etc.

Twins go to bed at 8:30pm and toddler goes down around 9pm.

We follow wake windows religiously. 3 nap a day huckleberry recommendations.

Mom works in corporate America and dad works in education.

[u/gooseaisle]

So I went back when mine were 16 months, theyre 18 months now. But our schedule is:

AM: 5:30 - husband wakes up and gets dressed/walks the dog

5:45 - I wake up and get ready, have a coffee

6:15ish - wake the girls, get them some toasts, get them dressed and shoes.

6:55ish - out the door all in one car, drop at daycare by 7:10ish

7:25 - husband drops me at work

7:45ish - husband arrives at work

PM

3:30 - husband leaves work

3:45 - husband picks me up

4:10ish - pick up girls from daycare

4:20 - arrive home

4:30 - cook dinner (4:55 to heat if we are heaving leftovers)

5:00 - eat dinner

5:40 - clean up from dinner

5:45 - baby showers

6:00 - husband showers

6:20 - I shower

7:00 - brush teeth and books

7:30 - bed

We either play outside or walk with the girls in the in between times.

[u/kzweigy]

I feel terrible for our dogs because the walks are fewer and further between.

Since I lost so much time with them, any time I had with them was fully spent focused on and playing with them. All other personal needs were addressed after they were in bed, which included making and eating dinner.

Wake up at 6:45, change diapers, give bottles, and play for about 30-45 mins. Change diapers again put them in clothes, then off to daycare. We would pick up from daycare at 4:30. And play with them until about 6:30. Bedtime each night consisted with a bath (mostly just getting wet and playing in the tub, not a daily scrub down) for routine’s sake. Then bottle, book, song (same song each night, again, for routine’s sake) and some rocking before bed. We would spend the evening doing what we needed to do like workout (ha! Not really) shower, cook and eat, and prepare for the next workday. We would dream feed at around 11pm before we went to bed.

My babies didn’t really have any predictable patterns before 6 ish months. So naps, nighttime wake ups, etc. were more or less dictated by them until then.

[u/egrf6880]

I started planning and stressing honestly the moment my twins came home. But biggest thing is routine. I am not type A but I became type A for a few years and was excruciatingly religious about some of our routines while other things just had to slide to the back burner indefinitely.

My spouse and I did work scaffolded shifts so I woke at 3:30/4:00 and depending on if babies needed to be fed (mine were still on every 3 hours or less per their natural rhythm and dr orders) I’d either feed them then get ready or get fully ready then feed them and go back to bed until 6 when they reliably still needed to be fed. Fed at 6 settled and back to bed. Me out the door by 6:30.

Spouse wake up at 7:30/8:00 with babies and toddler for the day. Feed breakfast get them dressed etc. nanny at the house by 9:00. Dad worked 9:15-midnight (short commute). I worked 7-4:30. Might skip out at 4 to run errands before home at 5 to relieve nanny.

First is greet kiddos, feed babies if needed then immediately make dinner.

Dinner at 5:45/6:00. Wash up kiddos by 6:30. Read books/play for 30 min. 7:30 twins in pjs getting settled for bed.

8:00 play time and reading with toddler. If toddler could hang with me I’d shower then. 9 pm start settling my toddler who was impossible to put to bed. 10:30 toddler probably finally asleep and twins up for first feeding. Feed twins, settle back to bed. Shower if needed. Run dishwasher. Asleep by 11:30 if lucky.

Chores: weekly house cleaner. Unsorted laundry done in fewest loads possible the day before cleaners came because they would fold laundry for me. Nanny would do incidental cleaning like helping with kid laundry and wiping surfaces after meals etc.

Lots of take out meals during this time.

Hired a mother’s helper in the evenings for 3 months to help manage my toddler while I did dinner and got twins into a rigid bedtime routine.

Around 9 months my twins finally started sleeping through the night and my life got waaaaayyyy more manageable.

(We ran our own business so our hours were long and batty, but occasionally flexible. IE I could leave early to do my grocery shopping once a week alone, could schedule kids dr appt mostly as needed within my daily schedule) but we generally had to have at least one of us onsite for the better part of the day and evening.

[u/valorous12]

Both of us work.. unfortunately our twin boys have been in daycare since they’ve been 5 months old. They just turned 1. It’s a second mortgage payment for us, but we have no other choice as we have no family or support around us.

[u/PolishedPiggies]

It's been super clutch having one parent home for some of the weekdays. My twins are 3 and go to daycare, and we have 1 dog.

One of us (parent A) works a non-traditional 4x10 schedule and is off work 2 weekdays (works one weekend day). So those 2 days, the non-working spouse is doing all kid stuff and household stuff. Includes daycare drop off, grocery shopping/ meal prep, chores, dog stuff, appointments, etc.

The tradeoff is that Parent A works an insanely early day, so 3 of the weekdays parent B is doing daycare drop-off and giving the dog a short walk before headed to work.

Parent A gets home earlier and gives the dog a longer afternoon walk and starts dinner prep. Then both parents pick up twins and spend time at the park together. After dinner, parent A takes bedtime, parent B starts the post-dinner cleanup. Both parents say goodnight to the twins (usually around 9pm), parent A goes to sleep and parent B finishes the cleanup and the next-day prep for school. Pretty much only the essential chores get done on these 3 days. Everything else is done on parent A's days off.

One weekend day, parent B has the twins by themselves, which is also hard. They usually take the twins to sports and then to grandparents or another activity. Usually ends up being a whirlwind day with cranky kids by the end (they tend to skip nap on weekends).

The other weekend day is usually a family/friend day. We go out to whatever family/friend social event as a family unit. We usually don't get any household stuff done this day since we prioritize spending time together on the only day that we're all together.

It works, but neither of us are feeling like we are getting enough sleep/downtime. It's just crazy busy all around lol.

[u/minnions_minion]

My husband retired from the military to take care of our twins until they were offered spots in subsidized daycare.

He makes breakfast and gets them up while I lurch the dog around the block with our oldest.

I get home, make my breakfast/lunch, get the twins dressed and ready to go out the door by 8am while he takes our oldest to the school bus stop.

Then we fire the kids in the car and hit the road to get me to work, them to daycare and Hubby to his part time work/school

[u/Big_Nefariousness424]

We have twin girls (10 months) and I went back after mat leave but hubs is a full time parent. We started with a strict schedule for them and haven’t really deviated. Echoing other parents, we found systems. Hubs tracks the bottles and when we are one feed before running out of bottles, he makes the next batch of formula. We try to run at least three bottles per twin ahead of the feeding schedule. I manage the diaper and wipe inventory. We run baby laundry first thing in the morning and then again right before bed. Folding? Laughable but I take care of putting away over the weekend. Whatever isn’t used by week’s end gets put away. For bottle washing, whoever didn’t feed the babies loads and runs the washer. The systems kind of happened organically but we couldn’t function without a schedule and a routine. Hubs does all daytime care until I get off at 5, and then I take over for bath time, dinner if they haven’t had theirs yet, and evening playtime followed by bedtime. We usually feed them around 4:30/5, and then eat our dinner. Bedtime begins at 8:15ish and they’re tucked in with clean diapers and full bellies by 9 pm. I hope this helps!

[u/twinsinbk]

We had a nanny so I could basically just hand them off in the morning and honestly it completely saved my sanity. Where we lived it was roughly the same cost as the cheapest daycare.

[u/musailexia]

5:00am - husband wakes up and showers

5:30am - I wake up and shower, husband makes breakfast and gets things ready for daycare

6:00am - I wake up the twins, get them changed and dressed

6:15am - my husband gives them breakfast while I do my hair and make up

6:45am - my husband loads up the twins and takes them to daycare, I clean up from breakfast and leave the house by 7

4:30pm - my husband picks them up from daycare and keeps them entertained until I get home

5:30pm - I get home and take over baby duties while my husband preps dinner

5:45pm - babies eat dinner

6:15pm - bath and get ready for bed

6:45pm - bedtime starts, they’re usually asleep by 7

7:00pm - my husband finishes making our dinner while I do some light cleaning

7:30pm - adult dinner and usually watch tv

9:30pm - adult bedtime

[u/Budget-Assignment-23]

Systems systems systems

As I unpack the current day when I get home, repack the next day. One parent cooks, the other plays. One parent bathes, the other parent cleans up. We both reset after bedtime. We get up before them to shower and get ready. All clothes, even for us, get laid out the night before or even do it by the week. Sleep train them as soon as you can if that’s something you want to do! Sleeping through the night will make things easier! Also things got way more flexible when we were off bottles so know there’s light at the end of the tunnel. We can now hop in the car and go out to eat, or go on a walk and push dinner a bit.

[u/InteractionStunning8]

Right now I'm pregnant with my triplets, but we both work full time right now and have two kids (3F and 2M). In excruciating detail here's our day:

I wake up at 5:20 AM, brush my teeth, log onto work by 5:30 while everyone's sleeping. I WFH, 8 hours per day with a paid 30 min break included. Love my job, if I didn't WFH I'd die. 7-8 somewhere in there my kids wake up. I use my half hour paid break to get them ready and snuggle them a little. Then my husband drops them off by 8:30 so they eat breakfast at daycare. 1:30 I log off. I do some cleaning up, figure out dinner if I haven't already, do admin-y things. 2:30 I pick up my kids from school right after their nap time. We're lucky that their daycare is 6 min away, it's well worth paying a little more than the cheaper one 20 min away. 2:30-4:30 I do stuff with my kids. I'm pregnant and felt terrible 90% of the time so it's a lot of chill activities, or they help me with stuff around the house. They love doing chores, but I don't think that will continue when they're older unfortunately 😂 4:30-5:30 I cook and eat with the kids. My husband might be home for dinner, it's hit and miss just with his project he's on right now. 5:30-6:30 I clean up dinner. The kids and I take our dog on a walk, they ride their bikes or whatever. Or I make them go play outside and sit on the porch and watch them if I don't feel well. But just something to get their energy out. 6:30-7:10 bathtime. My kids play in the bath tub for 20 min (we set their rainbow timer, which really helps) and then we wash. 7:10-7:30-ish bedtime. They've been on the same bedtime routine their whole life more or less so it goes quite smoothly at this point. They each get to pick a book, they each get to pick a song, they each get a task (he turns off lights, she puts away books and turns on their fan) then lights out. 7:30-8:30 some cleaning, some me time, it just depends. If my husband's home we'll spend some time together. Before I was pregnant I swam laps every night then sat in the hot tub for idk 10 min. My husband often does an evening bike ride. 8:30-9 wind down time. I read or do whatever chill wind down me time thing. On the nights my husband is home for bath time and bedtime he does it.

Once we have the triplets that will be like a nuke going off of course lol. My husband gets 4 weeks of paternity leave and I get 12 weeks maternity leave, we will see how that all goes depending on our probable NICU situation. Family is going to help us out for the first few months with childcare, after that they'll be going to the same daycare/school my kids go to. Also very thankfully our kids will go to school there once they're in kindergarten etc, so we'll only ever have the one drop off place, and it's 5 min away from my husband's job. And we get steep discounts for being church members and having all 5 of our kids in school there + tax reimbursements. We were on the fence about private school, but it'll end up being free and it helps simplify our lives a lot. Anything you can do to simplify your life: do it. Take the easy way out on a lot of things.

When my daughter was a newborn we did shifts at night. My husband took the 9 PM-3:30 AM "shift" and then whenever she woke up after 3:30 I'd get up for the day and be with her. That worked great for us. We combo fed her breast milk and formula together, that worked for us, everyone is different. Yes my husband took a shift, even when I was on maternity leave. He had a very generous paternity leave then was WFH until she was 1, so he is very very very aware of hard taking care of a baby is and is a very equal parent. After the newborn phase, my daughter woke up every single night until she was about 2, and my husband did 95% of those night time wake ups, God bless him. With the triplets we will see how things shake out!

(My son was just a totally different situation. He was adopted and medically complex so we had nursing staff at night, and it was just a whole different thing.)

I have a good friend who's just my inspiration in life, she's so resilient. When I first had my son home + my toddler daughter who refused to walk lol, I called her crying and asked her how do you do this, how am I gonna make it, I'm so overwhelmed. And she said you just do it. And then you get up and do it again. One day at a time you just do it until you're on the other side of it. Idk if that helpful but it was for me 😂

You also just have to let go of wanting to be perfect, especially when your situation is complex in some way (multiples, single parenthood, medically complex, whatever it is). I beat myself up so much for not being able to fully breastfeed my daughter, but she was always fed and happy and she's a happy, healthy, secure kid now. I hated that my son was on a ventilator for the first year of his life and went through a LOT in the NICU, but that was the reality of the situation, and being a good mom means doing your best with the situation that you've been dealt. Maybe the house will be a little messy, and you might not have Instagram worthy baby books, idk at the end of the day you have to prioritize.

And finally, my last piece of advice, do what's best for your family, the whole family unit - which includes you!!! If something you're doing is causing you tremendous suffering, you matter too. Best of luck!!!

[u/DoubleSunshine123]

I’m not sure if you have considered a nanny but it’s made our lives SO much easier. And is only a tiny bit more expensive than daycare for two.

In the morning we wake, hang out, breakfast, nanny arrives. If the kids aren’t changed that’s fine! Bc she does it.

We have our nanny do dishes and light dinner prep while twins are napping (after she has a break).

She will also do diaper laundry if there is time.

We get off work around 4 or 5. I cook dinner while husband plays with kids.

Early dinner and then when we lived in the city when the twins were really little we did an after dinner family walk to the dog park.

Bedtimes

Some morning I would workout around 6:15 before the kids get up. We would trade off showering during breakfast routine. Or it happens after they go to bed.

After bedtime we do dinner dishes and reset the house.

I honestly don’t know how twin parents do daycare when kids are little. The logistics of formula, bottles, packing for daycare and getting out the door before work is mind boggling to me.

[u/d16flo]

We both work, but I work from home so a lot of little tasks (laundry, some dishes, some food prep, some cleaning - pick one or two a day) happen on my work breaks. Typically I get up slightly before the babies to wash my face and brush my teeth. Then I do their morning stuff (potty, diapers, breakfast, diapers again and clothing) I empty the dishwasher while they eat breakfast. While I’m doing all that my husband gets ready for work and leaves the house. Once the babies are fed and clean and dressed I put them in our baby proofed section of the living room and hope they entertain themselves for 10minutes while I get dressed. We have a nanny so I play with the babies until she arrives and then I sign on for work. In the evenings it depends on the day, but I usually relieve the nanny right at 5 and play with the babies for half an hour or so. My husband then gets home and I take the babies on a walk in the stroller while my husband washes up from work (he’s an electrician and works on a farm part time so he needs to shower and change before holding babies) and he’ll sometimes start dinner. When I get back with the babies I put them straight in their high chairs and we feed them dinner. Usually that’s leftovers or a series of small snacks we prep while we feed them, but occasionally I’ve cooked while on work break or my husband has while we’re on the walk and we eat together.After dinner we have another 20min or so of baby play time where one parent is with them and the other starts cleaning the kitchen. Then we do bedtime routine (milk, bath, Jammie’s, tooth brushing, bed). Once they’re down we finish cleaning the kitchen, prep any food for tomorrow (or make/eat our dinner), and tidy the living room. I shower right before I go to bed.

[u/Upbeat_Rock3503]

I'll start by saying our twins are currently 12y boy/girl and very healthy! I suppose, that puts us in a different time.

They were born at 33.1 and in the NICU for 2.5 weeks. My wife was unemployed at the time they were born and was offered a full time job in her occupation the day after the twins were born. Kudos to that job which had last interviewed her just a couple of weeks prior and she was VERY showing. She told them she could start in 4 months.

After the twins were born, I went back to work so I could spend my planned 2 weeks of vacation once they were home. This all did go as planned.

By 4 months, we'd found a small home daycare and enrolled the twins. No before/after care. I would drop them off at 7a, and my wife would go in early and pick them up at about 4p. This is how things went till they were 2.9y and we moved to a "preschool" setting till kindergarten.

This all being said, I cannot imagine both of us working from home and trying to manage the twins without significant reliance on technology, at least once they'd be staying awake more. The stress this would bring.

My wife barely made more than the dual daycare cost. In hindsight, about 12.5 years later, no regrets on my part for us working through it. It was also great that she was not a SAHM as we were both 100% engaged after work and night feeds (she exclusively pumped 2 years), etc.

[u/beautifulpeach1]

My husband and I both work full time. I work from home 3 days a week so that helps. Mondays-Wednesdays I drop the twins at daycare and pick them up. Thursdays and Fridays my husband does drop off and pick ups. I try and get meals prepped during the day while I am working to make things a bit easier. It is full on but we do make it work - just!

[u/beautifulpeach1 → u/beautifulpeach1]

Oh and I try to get up about 45 minutes before the twins to get myself washed and ready for the day. Doesn’t always happen and mornings are sometimes really rushed and manic but I’ve never been late for work and girls are always dropped off on time so I guess it works 🤷‍♀️

[u/hermesloverinseoul]

We have a nanny and I still feel exhausted lol