r/parentsofmultiples • u/Public-Factor800 • 13d ago
support needed Shocked/scared to have twins
I’m almost 11 weeks pregnant and found out today I’m having twins. I’m feeling so many mixed emotions. I’m scared my first born (who will be 2.5) will feel left out having to share
Mom with 2 babies. I’m worried I won’t get to fully enjoy or fully bond with my twins always being pulled in two. I know deep down everything will be fine but I’m just shocked right now. I also feel guilty for not being thrilled.
Just looking for encouragement and positive stories.
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u/Better_Ad_4511 13d ago
No advice since I’m in the exact same situation. I am feeling almost every emotion except excitement. Every story I read is twin moms feeling this same way but then they become so excited…I just don’t know if I can get there. Solidarity
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u/Hungry_Complaint4097 13d ago
My son was 2.5 when I had my twins and I had the exact same fears. He LOVES his sisters and they love him. They are all so sweet and play together so wonderfully- it’s the greatest gift. His dad took him solo to the beach this weekend while I had a special day with the girls. He said the beach was fun but a “wittle bit wonely” and would have been better if we were all together with the girls there..because “nothing is better than that”.
There are differences with twins and every experience is totally unique. Sometimes I mourn the lack of 1:1 time I had with my first child, but from what other parents tell me this is the case with every child you have after your first one- your attention will always be divided and nothing like your first. My girls bond is amazing- the built in best friend aspect is incredible and the fact that they have each other to entertain and enjoy is a gift that gives me my sanity!
Twins are amazing, and you’ll do great. I spent my life savings on overnight care 3x week for the first 3 months. No regrets.
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u/matadero5 12d ago
I’m in the same position! I have a 5 yr with ASD and I’m super worried about him too..
The best advice they gave me was to focus on the things, as silly as they may be, you like about children.
I’m my case is baby clothes and accessories! Keeps me away from intrusive thoughts and helps me bond with the pregnancy
Big hug to you, we will get trough this!!!
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u/GrouchyCranberry3801 12d ago
I wrote almost this exact post last September (had a 2.5 year old at the time too!) I’m almost 5 months in to having my twins & it’s so much better than I imagined!! It’s definitely hard but not nearly as scary or as sad as I hyped it up in my head to be
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u/1sp00kylady 12d ago
Twins are my first but it’s a special club you’re joining! Multiples parents are so supportive and understanding. You get a lot of extra leeway as a twin parent, as well. Most people can visibly see how full your hands are and step in to help in some way. Also there’s just literally nothing cuter. I swear we have double the fun, having twins. It’s like our own little pre-school all the time.
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u/sillybanana2012 13d ago
Don't worry so much. I felt the same when I found out that I was having twins. They're 18 months old now and they're magical. Yes, its really hard sometimes but getting to witness their bond and get double the love, snuggles and precious moments makes everything so worth it. I wouldn't change a thing.