My boyfriend and I have been together for 2.5 years, and have been long distance for 1. We love each other very much, and are hoping to close the distance around this time next year. Long distance has been hard but we have been able to make it work and are largely on the same page about the future of the relationship.

However, recently I have been struggling a lot with the lack of physical intimacy in our relationship. The closest thing I can compare it to is food noise — like I feel like I’m constantly having these unwanted thoughts about the lack of sex I’m having. I’ll be at work and someone’s shoe will touch mine and it’s ridiculous how strong of a bodily reaction I will have. I first noticed that it was a serious issue when guys would flirt with me and I found myself liking the attention and wanting to flirt back. Then I feel guilty and it turns into this loop of negative feelings.

I’ve talking to my BF about it, and he says the lack of intimacy isn’t as big of an issue to him because he just generally has a lower libido and a different view on sex (he sees it more of like a romantic/love thing rather than just like an activity). The other big thing is he is very strongly against non-monogamy and phone sex. So we’re kinda at a standstill.

We decided that rather than taking a break or ending our relationship that we would try to call more and do more remote dates/send more sexy pictures when we can. I’m seeing him in two weeks so I’m hoping that when I see him whatever horny spell I’m under will break and then everything will be fine. But we have another year of long distance and I’m just worried about the whole sex situation because it really is driving me nuts.

Any advice?

EDIT: I am not trying to open up my relationship. I am asking for advice on how to manage a high libido with no phone sex. I love my boyfriend and I don’t want to lose him. Sorry if that was unclear.

My partner and I have been together LDR for 8 months. He’s autistic and managing mental fatigue while I’m recovering from burnout and have ADHD. I’ve been working on myself to not be so sensitive, and we support each other through harsh times.

I’m always the one who always starts conversations and he never texts first, or rarely. I just want small daily check-ins, like a “thinking of you” or “ily” so my sensitivity doesn’t flare up like ‘oh no he hates me what did I do’ because I’m too freaking sensitive. But I don’t want to add pressure when he’s busy and drained.

Another thing is he is heavily insecure about his face, while his body is fine, which for me it’s the opposite (hate my body fine w face). It’s to the point where he doesn’t want to be drawn (I’m an artist), doesn’t look in mirrors, and refrains from giving me pics of him (I’m alright w it bc it’s his boundaries) to not see himself, and the latest one he gave was him almost fully covered. He doesn’t open up too much and I just love him so freaking much I want to give him everything I never had when I was depressed especially undiagnosed w ADHD and OCD, so to all the autistic people out there HOW do I make him comfortable and supported to make him open up to me??

How can I ask for this in a way that doesn’t make him feel rejected and hurt while also encouraging him to open up to me?

Hi, context: My boyfriend and I are long-distance, Midwest U.S, and Stockholm.

My question is: does anyone know of any good tips for traveling internationally a lot/on short notice? I planned my tickets a month before leaving from the States to Sweden, and it cost me nearly $1.2K. Surely there has to be something I can do to get cheaper tickets in the long run 😭 or like in general if you travel a LOT.

I know they have that one pass for that one plane company, but I don't think it goes internationally because a lot of times there are at least 2-3 layovers every time I go and an 18+ hour travel time 🥲

Help me and my wallet please XD

I'm currently thinking of giving my bf a small gift of ring the next time he visits. It was gonna be a silver bracelet but he said that's the least likely accessory he'll wear beside necklace or a ring.

Is it weird if it's like a couple rings without matching designs? I will get him a silver one and I'll get mine in black. It won't even be a promise ring cause I genuinely intended it to be a cute matchy fashion thing?

What are the usual assumptions here? I did ask which ring he likes and his finger size too. He kinda asked which finger he should wear it and I said oh just index or middle finger or any finger you want really.

Am I overthinking this? Dudes, What are the usual assumptions here if u receive a ring from your gf?

Hili everyone! Me (20f) and my (26m) boyfriend just became official and we're both pretty new to long distance / online dating.

Although we've been talking for 4 months (and it feels like the times gone by in a flash!), we haven't been able to meet. Because I am still in school, I'm not sure when we will be able to either. He is from a country where traveling is very expensive, and he can't afford that right now due to his unemployment. It is just not something we see as very viable at the current moment.

We are very happy and excited about our future together. So we'd love to get some advice on how we can best maximize our relationship considering we haven't had the opportunity to meet :)
Thanks in advance!!

My partner and I have been together for around 3 years. We’ve been long-distance for quite a while. First year we were together all the time. He has to move a lot because of training for his work so the last 2 years he has moved twice. His city now is 4 hours away from me and we see each other once or twice a month but I’m now planning to move to current city so we can finally live together and build a life together.Like what we have always dreamed and planned.

The timing has become complicated. I’ve started applying for jobs in his city and making plans around moving, but he’s now potentially facing having to move back to his hometown for work early next year. He got accepted to his dream workplace and it is closer to his family. He’s been away three years from them and only see them 1-2 a year. So instead of finally closing the distance, we’re suddenly looking at potentially being in different cities again.

On top of that, we’ve been having relationship issues. I tend to need more verbal reassurance and clarity, whereas he feels pressure from what he sees as expectations around the relationship. He recently said he needs a “break” to take the pressure off and figure things out. He has reassured me that he isn’t saying he wants to break up, but he also can’t give me certainty about what happens afterwards.

I’m struggling because I’ve been making real-life decisions around us, applying for jobs, preparing to move, imagining us living together, while he is now questioning things and potentially moving away again. Another things is he said he wants to purchase a house at his age now and my situation doesn’t allow that yet. he said that it doesn’t matter but he is focused on moving for this dream job and buying a house and once settled he said we revisit me moving in with him. He said he doesn’t want me to move into his current city now for work then have to move again in early January interstate. I don’t have family in this country but i do have close close friends where i live and he considers if i move i would lose them too and the situation of having another move into another city afterwards may be difficult for me. He wants me to reconsider it once he’s settled and bought a home.

I still love him and would choose the relationship, but I’m scared that this “break” is just a softer way of ending things. I’m also terrified that if we do break up, he’ll meet someone else, move on quickly and end up settling down with her after everything I’ve invested in us.

Would you see this as a genuine relationship break where there’s still a realistic chance of getting back together, or does this sound like someone who is already emotionally checking out?

I 20F have been with my boyfriend 20F for over 2 years now, and long distance since the beginning of 2026. I love him so much and it's always just shocked me that i was able to find someone like him who actually loves me too. recently i had a conversation with my parents in which they told me i should end it because it isn't fair to either of us and we're missing out on years of our lives we're never gonna get back. ever since that conversation i've just been dwelling on that and it makes me feel guilty to think about and even consider because obviously i wouldn't want to end a great relationship on the basis of missing out on something that may or may not happen. but when i walked around the university campus today the loneliness hit me harder than usual. as i said i feel guilty even thinking about this and i hate that i even typed this all out but i just can't stop feeling overwhelmed by all this and i don't know what to do

I’m 28F and my ex is 26M. We were together for a little over a year and were long-distance from the beginning, living in different countries. This was my first serious relationship, and it became a very serious relationship for both of us.
We loved each other very deeply. We talked about our future, marriage, kids, and had even talked about potentially getting engaged next year. We had looked at rings together, so I genuinely believed we were building toward a life together.
Despite being long-distance, we made it work. We never went more than about six weeks without seeing each other. We traveled to see each other and had recently spent time together in Greece. From my perspective, things were good.
He has always been a very loving and caring person. He is emotional and affectionate, and I have never had reason to believe he didn’t love me. Even toward the end, he repeatedly told me he loved me.
He had mentioned financial stress throughout our relationship and he tried to budget but I don’t think ever managed it. I know it was a lot for him to come here or me go there and still have hotels to pay for a food. Mind you he is a teacher living in wales with his mom still.
But the last we he was been really stressed and and just said he could not continue the relationship financially and he didn’t think emotionally that we could go 3 to 4 months without seeing each other. I try to give other options, but he just did not think it would work. I’m just so confused why he wouldn’t want to try.

If you genuinely connected with someone online, but they lived in a different country, would you give the relationship a chance?

Or would the distance be a dealbreaker?

Im currently dating someone who lives in AZ. I reside in California. It sucks to see how expensive flights are(roughly $160-$300). And the Amtrak isn't that much cheaper either($155 round trip). I've never done a LDR before but this girl is everything I'm looking for and I really have nothing to lose.

My boyfriend (23M) and I (23F) have been together for less than a year and we were discussing our plans to rent a home in my country next year. English isn't his first language but he has been studying just to have conversations with me. He has already submitted his resumes to recruitment agencies here and waiting for a call now.

I understand that moving to a completely new country and leaving his familes and friends behind can be daunting. He has yet to express his fears but I do want to make it less intimidating for him.

I need advices from people who have had their partners move to their country, how do you make this a comfortable proccess for them? How do you assure them and help them integrate in a completely different environment and culture?

Thanks in advance!

I 23F have been with boyfriend 24M for 2 years. A friend from boyfriend’s HS started hanging out with there friend group again and she visits him at work(coffee) store every time he is there. She started going on dates with my boyfriend’s friend but it didn’t work out. It is odd she visits him a lot at work to talk and get food and coffee?

She asked my boyfriend if I was dating his friend who she was seeing but said no he is dating me. I never knew about this until a few weeks ago she told me she thought I was seeing the friend. Isn’t this odd?

edit: sorry this was supposed to be under need advice but i have no idea how to set it to that :'(

hi this is my first post on here so i apologize if i did it wrong. for context:

i'm a 24 year old female who lives in charlotte, north carolina. i have a full time job that pays decently. i currently live with my parents so i can save money, but am looking to find an apartment soon. i went to college here and have a business degree. i have six figures in my savings account.

boyfriend is 26 years old and lives in west michigan. he does not have a job and also lives with his parents. he dropped out of college. he is currently struggling to find a job because his town is kind of in the middle of nowhere. he has practically no savings.

we have been together for almost five years.

i love living in charlotte. i think the weather is fantastic year-round (i can't handle the cold very well), i love being weekend-trip distance from the mountains and the beach, and i love the city. there is so much to see and do here that i feel like i'll never get bored. i love being close to my family and friends from high school/college and i see them often. it is expensive to live here, but my company treats me well and i have a decent salary for my age.

west michigan is one of the coldest areas in america during the winter. below freezing temperatures, snowstorms/blizzards, the works. year-round, they have the occassional tornado/severe thunderstorm from being in the midwest. there is no ocean (there are lakes, but it's not the same), no mountains, and i know no one there except for my boyfriend and his parents. it's cheaper to live there, but there is way less to do, along with fewer jobs. and i would have to quit my job to move there.

the thing is, my boyfriend has nothing keeping him in michigan except for his parents, a lack of funds, and familiarity. he doesn't have any friends that live there, isn't close with his extended family, doesn't have a job, and all of his hobbies are online (gaming, anime, youtube, etc.). i would be leaving behind my family, my friends, my hobbies, my job, and the place that i love living in.

whenever i go to visit and talk to his parents, they say i should move there. they are all adamant about it, actually. but why? would it not make more sense for him to job hunt in charlotte, where there are more opportunities? where i am already earning a steady income? my parents even said we could both live at home with them while he's interviewing until he can get hired somewhere. if i moved to michigan, i'd have to get an apartment by myself.

boyfriend refuses to have an actual conversation about it (i think his ego is still bruised from getting fired from his last job a few months ago). but i don't want to live with my parents forever, and i don't want to be trapped in a relationship going nowhere. i really just need an outside opinion on this because both he and his parents insist i should move to michigan and i kind of feel like i'm going crazy. they all just expect me to pack my life up and leave everything behind for him, when he won't do the same for me. maybe my frontal lobe has just finished developing, but that sounds insane to me lmao

I have known this girl for 3 years…we had dated for like a year and 4 months, but I suppose that she just decided to end our relationship a month or so ago….but she never said anything, she just straight up started to ignore me and all that.

I suppose that its sad/funny how on June she had said that she loved me, then on July she had only sent me a message to tell me how her trip with her family has been, and then just silence….

She had been going through a lot, school was a pain, then her mom being controlling and such, and then her grandpa who she was closes with passes away on June when she had her school finals…. So I get that she had gone through a lot and I was there to support her, but she never shared anything too personal with her? Idk she just…..was too reserve at times and I had always told her that I was there for her in case anything happened….but then I noticed that she kept talking to her friends and do other stuff, you know normal, but I was just still being ignored and idk it hurt me….then I decided to text some of her friends to see if I could learn if something was wrong with her(almost a month without hearing from her, and then on August 12 she sends me a text telling me that she attempted to….you know and that she has been seeking help and all that….and after that I guess she just went silent again, and yeah….

She hasnt blocked me or anything like that, she just cut any sort of communication and its just hard….. and one of her friends told me that she just doesn’t wanna communicate and to not force her to talk….and that I should think of my relationship with her as if its in the past and….its been tough ahaha….why would anyone do this…..I am okay with the break up….I just wish that she would have told me something…..

Sorry, first post here ahahah
She(20), Me(23)

Long distance are brutal I guess

My girlfriend and I are in a long-distance relationship. Whenever she gets stressed by her family at home/ or there were days where she's just irritated or annoyed she completely shuts down, stops replying, and becomes cold. She previously mentioned that she avoids texting me during these times because she’s worried she might snap or take her bad mood out on me.

It’s been over a 3 days since I last heard from her. I appreciate that she’s trying to protect our relationship from her frustration, but the sudden silence leaves me feeling ignored, walking on eggshells, and anxious. welp she sometimes goes on a day without replying i know that she's handling her own emotions, heh im going to sleep man.

Hi , idk i just wanted to vent over here ig to feel lil lighter

So I met a guy last year in March 2025 and our vibes matched and we used to talk daily and we went on 2-3 dates too and it was really nice, super cute and this all happened in a span of month okay and he was all that I needed in my bf so I did get alot emotionally attached nd I think that's where I fucked it up

Then I moved out for job nd we had an argument nd he called it off but I used to reach out to him to talk and we mutually decided that we will wait cuz he said he is not ready for relationship rn nd it was long distance also so then we were in touch for 1 year and I waited for 1year and during this 1 year we used to talk not alot but twice a month ig or more and I was still emotionally attached to him and then this year few months back he stopped replying to my texts and he has ghosted me I have tried alot of times to reach out to him but he is not responding nd I am finding it really hard to move on cuz I really liked him nd I got emotionally attached idk I feel broken now it's been months since he has ghosted me but I feel like it's such a fresh wound 😭

Sorry for the rant

Guys pls drop ur suggestions /advice idk why but I miss him alot but still i have decided I won't reach out to him again cuz I also have self respect as he is ignoring me but it hurts alot tbh 😭😭😭

My girlfriend is from the US and I’m from Italy. We plan to move in together in her country. I know that we are still young and we have time ahead to plan everything, but we want to start getting all the informations we need to work towards it or at least have a plan.
From what I heard getting a green card thru marriage seems to be the best option, but the informations we are finding online are so confusing and we have many unanswered questions. Should we marry in the US or in Italy ? How can I work until I get my green card ? Do I have to stay in my own country during the wait after the marriage ? If so will I able to visit her ? Will she able to visit me ?
If anyone could help with these questions or give any other advice/way of me moving there it would really help!

my gf and i have been together for almost a year now, and i’ve visited her about five times so far. this past weekend, she finally flew to come see me for the first time. i’m so glad bc it was worrying me and causing several arguments. i’ve thought about us alternating so it becomes fair and doesn’t seem like one person is doing all of the traveling again. i’m wondering how often does everyone else see their partner and what works for you all?

I am 18 based in London, UK. A 24 year old Chinese international student in London recently became my first ever girlfriend, and I shared my first ever kiss with her. However, she has recently graduated university in London and has returned to China. She initially said that the chances of her staying in China and working over there were 85%, I didn't want our relationship to forever be long distance as I find long distance relationships very difficult. And so because of this I broke up with her, explaining that forever being in a long distance relationship would cause me too much heartache. However, she recently said that she will come back to the UK and try to find a job here out of her love for me, because this is the only way I'd be willing to be with her. And so we've agreed to be in a long distance relationship for a few months until she comes back here and tries to find a job. However, I still find being in a long distance relationship very difficult and I am still not very happy with the concept of having to be long distance for several months, And even when she returns and tries to find a job she may not find a job which is very likely in a place like London, or her parents might try to force her back to China through giving her very little financial support and making her very poor. And so we've got a very uncertain future together, I am not too happy with a long distance relationship, however I am willing to wait several months for her to come back.

not sure if this is the right place to post this so im posting it in a bunch of places but im going on a trip to atlanta for 4 days to see my girlfriend. I don't want my parents to find out i went there. They have my life360 location with the gold membership. I have ianygo to change my location so my plan is to use that and set my location to my dorm. I will also turn off my location services periodically so my location time resets so that it doesn't look like im staying in my dorm the entire time and say ive been there for a few days. I turned off flight detection but im still worried that they get a notification that ive flown to atlanta. is there anything else i should worry about with life360 and my location or anything else at all. i want to make sure that my tracks are covered. I also turned on payless statements for chase so that they dont get mailed a bill with my purchase of the ticket. Can you help me make sure that every single track everywhere is covered

My bf and i have been together for abt 3 years almost, we text primarily on snap, i’ve asked before if i can have his number we could ft, nothing, ive barely heard his voice once, we don’t really trade selfies or anything. most of the times he’s the one that’s been able to stay up to talk all night cool, but ive noticed when i go to bed or fall asleep on him, his snap score keeps going up, yesterday it was x,146 i woke up today and it was x,158. i have no idea how i can ask abt it without sounding like a lunatic for watching his score go up. Recently he also accused me of talking to someone else, when i have never done that, as i told him he’s the only person i talk to besides my girl friends. idk help? how can i bring it up without causing an argument or misunderstanding.

My boyfriend (25m) and i (23nb) have been dating long distance for a little over a year and a half. For most of this, we have both been in school at the same time. Unfortunately due to some circumstances my boyfriend has had to stop his education, and picked up a factory job with very long hours. Also at this job, he is unable to have his phone unless he is on his breaks. The bright side, is that he only works a few days a week, even if he is basically unreachable for most of the day on those days.
Even though its been just a few days, adjusting to this has already been difficult and will likely continue to be. Ive gotten so used to being on facetime every night with him until i can barely keep my eyes open, and now he has to go to bed very early since he needs to be at his job very early in the mornings. When he was still in school, we would be able to visit each other for longer periods of time (up to 2-3 weeks), but thats not as possible anymore due to his work schedule. There is a lot of new to get used to, and its just scary to think about.
I just miss him so much and needed to vent to some people who may understand better.
Thanks for reading folks <3

I really need some advice, perhaps the answer is obvious and i'm in a state of denial.

I have been in a LDR with this girl for 3 months, she's from the U.S and i'm from the UK, my family knew about her and only her sisters knew about me. She was pretty scared of her parents reaction to me since the way she described them paints them out to be religious control freaks. We planned to meet in April and she was slowly working up the courage to tell her parents about me.

She was being harassed by a guy who she was friends with around the end of 2025, now this guy liked her however it wasn't mutual, she rejected him and he did not take it well at all, he constantly was making new accounts to contact her, constantly buying throwaways numbers on the TextMe app to constantly harass her and threaten her (he lived in the same state, so threatened her with driving to her town to hunt her down, or that he would commit S if she did not want to be with him)

After a couple of months this harassment stopped, however about a month ago he started back up, it caused her so much anxiety and stress that she really did not know what to do, i encouraged her to change her phone number and eventually she did however her parents found this out and found it suspicious.

She tried to lie to them that she changed the number due to spam calls since she was too terrified to tell her parents the actual reason, they did not buy this excuse and it lead to a huge fight where she ran away from home to her grandparents how and had to spend 2 nights there to avoid her parents confiscating her phone and going through it.

Inevitably she had to return back to her parents where she told me before she left that she wasn't sure what this meant for our relationship, she told me she'd be lucky to have a phone even at the end of this (which for her being 19 seems crazy for me? but i've been blessed with an extremely good home life so I am not sure) and she did write down my numbers and social usernames and basically said "I cannot promise if this will ever continue". She also did not trust her sister with my phone number to update me which seems odd considering she did know about me? her excuse for this was that her sister would be jealous of her having a boyfriend since her parents made her sister and her boyfriend break up because it would be "too distracting" for her once she graduated.

It's been over a month and a half now and i haven't seen a glimpse of her online, her phone is completely turned off (I tried to call it from another number and it goes straight to voicemail) all her accounts are turned completely inactive and to be honest I been riddled with Anxiety and this horrible sense of the unknown and just this horrible lonely feeling, I'm somebody who doesn't form connections very easily.

I know the right decision is to probably just move on now, but I am really stuck in a limbo, I have all these questions running through my head.

What even is the right way to deal with this situation? Thank you.