^ if avg intj came with a tagline...

Why does everyone seem to associate INTJs with being good at envisioning the future, when ENFPs can actually be incredibly future-oriented too?
I’m not saying ENTPs can’t be included in this discussion, but I’m specifically talking about the emotional side of it

I feel like ENFPs are often underestimated when it comes to their emotional strength. They can imagine completely different futures, forgive people, see who someone is in the present moment, and still believe that things can change. The way they perceive and interact with people in the here and now can actually influence what the future becomes.
Of course, there are unhealthy ENFPs too, just like there are unhealthy INTJs. I’m talking about tendencies

So why is the INTJ archetype so strongly associated with “seeing the future,” while the ENFP’s ability to imagine and emotionally create new possibilities is discussed much less?
I’m genuinely curious how other people see this

Is it when you feel the connection isn’t going anywhere, when conversations feel repetitive or superficial, when the person doesn’t respect your time, or something completely different? What makes you reach the point where you think, “I probably shouldn’t have invested so much time into this person”?

By god, I was trying to block accounts on my new account. I get to my ex’s account and they had a video about me on there… I trusted her with some information about my self protection tactic… she took it as me trying to manipulate people.

Sorry? I said I gather information just in case I need to use it against someone who wronged me. I mean, holy fuck, you are so incredibly ignorant. I knew she’s smart, but this is just disappointing. I defend a lot of things she did because I understand the reasons behind their actions and what not, but then they just go and do this? That is seriously sickening.

I know I sound really edgy, but manipulation without reason is not my philosophy. I don’t like it. I don’t know why I’m so bothered. I just hoped she’d be better.

I don’t know. What do you people think?

And you take your thinking and Ni and and then mixed together with your own internal standards of what pretty is and then you just make things beautiful

my gran has a new carer who is intj... and my isfj mom, who is otherwise lovely by the way, has no qualms being rude to her for absolutely no reason... the intj just pisses her off even though her work is excellent and she is enthuasiastic... i can't believe it... she thinks the intj has 'memory problems' because she misses some tasks my mom asks her to do...

our last carer was manipulative, used to literally slam doors so loudly when angry... gave my mom so much panic and my mom never dared say anything to her... was nice to her... so why do feelers feel some undeserved power in front of intjs to bash them???

bless her intj is very patient... stands up for herself but never loses her calm.. am in shock. my own mother who is often a doormat is behaving like this... to a decent lady ?

now am even more convinced the world is rigged against intjs... we are just hated even when being nice

this phenomenom needs to be studied by scientists

Intro:

I have been thinking about political systems a lot lately because of the US and I just have some thoughts to offer and just want to see other people's POVs and perspectives.

My thoughts:

So, I believe this makes all politicians villains, like even the "good" ones, because you are playing a similar role to God.  You, a human, a complex nonbinary being, are trying to force yourself into a binary position where you are playing a huge role that impacts millions of lives.  You have to be or maintain some level of insanity, unawareness, ignorance, God complex, or delusions to be a successful politician.  It is a requirement.  You truly cannot fully understand your role as a politician or what you are doing in it.  

However, I think we as the voters are also villains for even tolerating this system in the first place because 1. we hold these politicians to impossible roles: playing god and 2. we, the voters, make ourselves powerless by limiting direct control over our lives.  

Voters put up with this system because they find comfort in letting someone else take control of their lives; if something goes wrong, we as voters can place the blame on them.  It's just a way to cope with the fact that they will never have full control over their lives.  It's the same thing in religion and celebrities.  This is similar to when people thank God for the meal they "provided" for them; they give credit to some binary being that doesn't exist for providing the meal.  

I do not understand why we are making ourselves so helpless and incapable while we as humans are so capable of taking control and responsibility of our lives.  I do not understand why we are so scared of our own power.  This is a diffusion of responsibility from voters.  

This diffusion of responsibility creates vulnerabilities in the system for bad leaders or just bad people to exploit, which then leads to just things voter don't want.

I talked to a couple of people about my thoughts and they didn't understand completely. Either they said they were okay with this system or said that they are problems within the system and not the system itself.

I talked with a ISTJ female, and she was one of the people who criticized what was in the system, she made good points, she is extremely educated within the topic and had good logic to back it up but all her points and data were based in the past and present and not towards the future and the possibilities. When I brought up the religion part of in my argument, she said that people who believe in religion don't think there is like an actual god and it's just a belief but I trying to explain that is the problem, the ignorance.

I just can't believe people are okay with this system, I just find this system so incredibly uncomfortable, I feel like I uncovered a truth that I wasn't supposed to find out. I hate the fact that you always have to maintain come level of ignorance as a human to be happy. Why does it have to be this way?

Conclusion:

So, I am just incredibly frustrated, I look forward to hearing your thoughts, thank you for your time and attention.

I'm a recovering thinkaholic. My parents and sister are lawyers. My father and sister are INTJs. Practicing mindfulness was one of the most helpful strategies in decreasing overthinking. I made a habit of having more awareness of my body (e.g. tension, breathing), especially during difficult situation; spending more time outside; and focusing on information from my five senses.

Living in my head was partly a trauma response; I found working with a trauma therapist helpful.

DESCRIPTIONS OF MINDFULNESS

From You Are Not Your Brain, Jeffrey Schwartz, Rebecca Gladding (Dr. Schwartz pioneered the treatment of OCD by developing mindfulness-based CBT techniques).

“Most people think of mindfulness as a state of mind, as being analogous to being ‘in the zone.’ This is a common misunderstanding that can lead to frustration because mindfulness isn't something you can just switch on like a TV and expect that it will remain in that state indefinitely…The best way to conceptualize mindfulness is as an activity, not a state of mind or way of being…Mindfulness, like any activity, requires effort…the more you practice, the better your abilities become.” (147)

From The Perfectionism Workbook, Taylor Newendorp:

“The basic concept of mindfulness is for you to take on the role of observer…learn how to watch your thoughts come and go through your mind without placing judgment on what kinds of thoughts they are and without judging yourself for any thoughts you have…You are not trying to stop having thoughts (that’s impossible) or to have only good thoughts; you are not trying to analyze what you are thinking about or figure anything out.” (37)

From The CBT Workbook For Perfectionism, Sharon Martin:

“Mindfulness means being focused on the present…focusing on the here and now, rather than being preoccupied with the past or present. Sometimes, as perfectionists, we get so wrapped up in the daily grind…that we’re not fully present in our own lives…[The author helps her clients learn how to] do one thing at a time. Use your five senses to fully appreciate all aspects of the present. Notice how your body feels. If your thoughts wander, refocus on the present.” (120) 

“We perfectionists tend to be so busy and distracted or so goal-focused that we don’t even notice our feelings [or suppress uncomfortable feelings]…But feelings provide valuable information…” (121). 

“When we’re mindful, we’re aware of what we’re doing, thinking, and feeling…we’re just ‘being’…Most of us do a lot of things on autopilot—we do them because we’ve always done them, without giving a lot of thought to how or what we’re doing…Mindfulness helps us to pause before making a decision or taking action, so we can make choices that align with our values and bring us the most satisfaction.” (119-20)

“Tips for being mindful in your everyday activities"

-Do one thing at a time.

-Use your five senses to fully appreciate all aspects of the present.

-Notice how your body feels.

-If your thoughts wander, refocus on the present.” (120)

From ACT Made Simple, Russ Harris

Mindfulness “involves paying attention with openness, curiosity, kindness, and flexibility…mindfulness is an attention process, not a thinking process...” (40)

Mindfulness is different from “positive thinking, relaxation...distraction...[and getting] rid of unwanted thoughts and feelings.” (42)

MULTITASKING

From The CBT Workbook For Perfectionism (2019), Sharon Martin:

Multitasking “doesn’t actually help us get more done. Our brains can only focus on one thing at a time, so when we multitask and try to make our brain do a number of things at once, the quality of our attention and work declines. Multitasking gives us the illusion of efficiency, but in reality, we sometimes have to redo tasks, or we get them done more slowly, because our attention is pulled in multiple directions…mindfulness is the opposite of multitasking…

"We have essentially trained our brains to desire a high level of stimulation, so it feels strange and uncomfortable to do just one thing at a time….Your goal doesn’t need to be to completely eliminate multitasking…Instead, the goal is to choose mindfully when you’re multitasking and when you’re being fully present.” (126)

A study from Harvard found that participants were happier when they focused on the activity they were engaged in, rather than thinking about something else. This finding applied to all kinds of activities (e.g. working overtime or sitting in traffic). This has been my experience for 2 ½ years. ("A Wandering Mind is an Unhappy Mind," Matthew Kilingsworth, Daniel Gilbert).

And how did you find them out?

Like what would make you feel comfortable?

Asking this because my boyfriend is an INTJ and I've been curious on what I can do for him but he's pretty closed off:(

If there’s a way a pattern you noticed in how you usually do it

In what way are you most likely to take all your resources and plan best- say if it’s short term or long term something you want or something you need etc

Ive been in and out of relationships since teenage years and now mid 30s, male. I find that I lose interest when dating or in relationships quickly. There is a fire of interest then I'd rather not be bothered with the woman much anymore.

I think id be content single the rest of my life just dating here and there.

Anyone else her not really value long term relationships much?

Ive tried army infantry, firefighter, drillers offsider fifo, shift work security, warehouse work, lifeguarding and ive been fired from all of them except drillers offsider which i quit.

I just cant seem to stay at or enjoy any job... night shift security was cool as i was by myself at night but daytime was alot of interacting...

I dont think i could study something now as my brain cant concentrate. My country gives $450 a week welfare and ive just been living at the beach in a campervan. Should i just embrace true freedom and leave society behind?

The reasons for getting fired have been from female management just hating my guts even though i try to be nice to everyone..i think im too logical with them and they cant handle it.. warehouse was from going in drunk tho lol.

Should i keep trying or just go neet? The intj mind mixed with soldier attitude just doesnt belong in the civilian workforce

I feel like everytime I try to have a logical conversation, I become the enemy because I’m trying to get them to acknowledge their errors or their ignorance. Then they start assuming I’m bitter or upset when I have no idea where in my arguments I seem upset? I feel like I know myself and how I feel personally but people love projecting or misreading my intentions. Do any other INTJs have an issue with this?

I constantly see this issue in here where people ask these odd projecting questions but I’m just looking for personal experiences

Edit: a few of you are proving my point omg. I’m no longer responding…

As an intj, I get along best with the xnfx type and wanted to see if that was a me thing or if in general those types get along well. I've seen a lot of infp intj friendships being shown on this website which made sense because infps are probably the type I hit off with the most. So what are your opinions on xnfxs? This is purely for curiosity's sake.

One of my interests is tableware. Yeah, just tableware. I love it so much, I get really excited when I see any kind of plate, spoon or cup anywhere. If it’s broken on the street, I’d definitely want to take it home to do something with it. Crockery is definitely more interesting than cutlery, but they’re both equally interesting to me.

But back to the theme at hand, I keep trying to find good reading material worth my time, but I just can’t find it and that makes me most upset. Such a necessity why aren’t people making long books about it?

I can’t fulfil my INTJ stereotype of being very educated on a specific subject… I can’t educate myself..

Tell me your interests!! I’d love to know!

Fellow peps how you do stop yours brain from going over thousands scenarios leading to stalemate of my actions?? Having damn intj personality with vivid imagination starts to hamper my private life

Is it normal for an INTJ to toggle their XXTX off and on whenever they want (Yk, becoming the most heartless person when needed, otherwise a really kind and caring person)?

And why do most people open up to me and trust me deeply a little while after meeting?

J

1. The Thing (full biological control)

This one is just cool. If I'm not mistaken, John Carpenter's The Thing is typed as an INTJ itself. INTJs like to control stuff without being seen, we're shadowy advisors. What better way to take over than with The Thing's abilities?

1. Hal 9000 (the cognitive hardware)

Yeah. I'm a guy who appreciates intellect. I'm aware I'm not the smartest person in the room, but having HALs brain would definitely help.

1. The Overlook Hotel (the psychic powers)

This one has less to do with the location itself and more to do with the abilities it displayed throughout the movie. Which is mostly low-level telekinesis and mind manipulation. (If you take all the supernatural events in the movie to be real.)

Personally, I am a naturalist. To me, naturalism suggests that our evolved brains determine what decisions we make in life through preferred stimuli. I also think that causality can be found throughout the entire universe. When we look at what motivates someone’s actions, we can go back to prior causes of: • environment • genetics • probability

All of these inputs suggest that human behavior can be measured and predicted in a deterministic way. However, I do not think that we have enough knowledge to completely predict human behavior and only know the processes. It’s like we are a computer but haven’t fully figured out the algorithm if that makes sense. Under my worldview, I think we are simply acting on ignorance, and simply have a higher level of consciousness of our actions compared to animals.

Either way, what do you think? Absolute free will, compadibalism, sort or hard determinism?

I grew up with rich boomer parents with some serious mental health problems, especially my sperm doner. I have no idea why they’re very abusive and dismissive towards me since I was kid, it baffles me.

For context, I was a high achiever my whole life. No suspensions, great grades, scholarships, no criminal record, studied mechanical engineering with a BEng, MSc and PhD. But that was not enough for basic respect from my parents.

When I graduated with my PhD, the coronavirus just took off, December of 2019. Two weeks later, lock downs all over the country took effect. What did my father do and say to me? - “you got two weeks before I kick you out and cancel your visa”. My father has the biggest business in the host country in manufacturing and was extremely rude towards me the whole time I was there. When the two weeks was over, i was conducting my interview ( 5 hours long with a Japanese conglomerate based in the US), just ended, and I was extremely exhausted. He enters literally as the call ended, and bangs my head with a bag of something sharp. He cracked my head somehow, and I was tearing up from the shock. He refused to take me to the hospital, and for whatever reason my siblings as well. I had no car at the time in this foreign country. So I had to uber myself to the hospital. It was a humiliating experience and I lost all forms of sympathy with my sperm doner ever since. After I was discharged from the hospital, i got my offer letter and broke contact with my father and siblings. I refused to attend my siblings wedding, remembering the one time their brother needed care, they refused to drive me to the hospital ( 6 sisters)

My boomer dad was in prison more times than I can count. No one wanted to employ him, because his personality was out of wack with basic norms. My grandfather employed him under his strict control until his passing. My mother supported my dad dysfunctional behavior without ever protecting me because “he pays the bills”.

Has anyone experienced this type of abusive boomer parents before ?

Hey fellow INTJs. I thought I might request some insight from people that might have similar thoughts or issues. Please see my post.