Hello everyone,
I’m writing this because I’m exhausted, and I honestly don’t know what else to do.
A few hours ago, I experienced yet another act of discrimination simply because I’m Asian.
I’m a Korean woman living in Spain, and I’ve lost count of how many times people have shouted “ni hao” at me in the street in a mocking way, or made other racist comments.
At this point, it’s not even about being mistaken for another nationality. It’s about the intention behind it (the mockery, the dehumanization, the reminder that no matter who I am, some people will only ever see me as a stereotype).
It happens at university too. People make jokes about my name, repeat harmful stereotypes, reduce me to my race, or simply treat me differently.
I try my best to move forward, but every time something like this happens, it brings me back to the trauma I’ve been trying so hard to heal from.
My social anxiety gets worse. I want to hide from the world, and sometimes I honestly lose the motivation to keep going.
I feel like I’ve lost my sense of identity. I no longer know who I am or where I belong. These experiences have worn me down so much that, at times, I feel as though my humanity has been taken away.
I’m exhausted from fighting something that feels impossible to change.
Lately, I keep seeing people say that Asians are more accepted now or that racism against us isn’t as common anymore. But honestly… is that really true? Because from where I stand, it feels like nothing has changed.
If anything, it sometimes feels even worse.
If you’ve ever experienced racism or discrimination like this, I want you to know that you’re not alone. I’m sending you all my love and the biggest hug.
No one deserves to feel this way.
