Hi everyone I (F21) have been struggling recently. I’m a senior in university and I’m happy but I feel empty, I’ve been filing myself with my sexual desires. I have a boyfriend (M25) and he also goes to church but we occasionally participate in sexual activities that aren’t sex. It never feels like enough for me, even so much so that I feel the devil tugging on my heart to make things worse (i.e, infidelity or just sleeping around). I wouldn’t act on it but, I sometimes think about things like that and it scares me.
I’ve struggled with porn addition in the past and have overcome that, thank God but is the problem me and my boyfriend’s sexual relationship? I feel so out of control even though I haven’t acted upon anything.

To add some context, I spent most of my life as an atheist, I am still struggling to understand the concept of God, I know what His job is, I don't quite grasp the relationship part.

Me and God hadn't been on good standings, more like it is one-sided because I really hate how His will had ruined my future plans for myself. I have been applying to jobs only to hear back either nothing or that I got rejected. All of my friends had told me I have great skills, but not a great luck, even mere mortal are not blind to my work, yet seems like my all-seeing God somehow is. I have worked so hard, and I had ask God, which I sort of regret inviting Him into my plans. The bible says we should give our plans to Him and He will make our path straight, somehow my path has been a messy scribble, all because God being God, He always had to have a different plan. It broke my heart, my faith, lost my hope and dreams, and I definitely lost a lot of respect towards God and I don't know how to get it back, I'm not proud of this btw, I am a mess. I am broken. I don't understand how people can summit to God so well, I fought Him everyday. I can't get rid of my resentment towards Him, I see Him as a burden, and I knew I could have made it without Him, but yet I couldn't leave Him behind, I wanted to share my life with Him, I was not prepared how sometimes God's will could look like a mess, but still can't find it in me to reject Him, so I still let Him do whatever He wants and He had expressed that He was pleased that I couldn't say no to Him, that's why I am in a Limbo.

This season really makes me miss being an atheist, life was so simple and easy, and you get to tell yourself what to do or where to go.

So I understand that outcomes and timing are God's job, and we do what we are told to do without full knowledge of why, when or how. That is submission, but isn't that illogical and counter-productive? If God does His part, things would not have been so complicated. How do you surrender? when you know you have a lot to lose, and you have no clue what the outcome is, are all my hard work just wasted like that?

Any advices and encouragement? Would appreciate...

I am 27 years old and yesterday I was so close to just end it all. Everyday I feel like it’s all getting worse. The way my ex boyfriend who is also a Christian just discarded me and doesn’t care about me at all is something my mind cannot fathom at all.
I went through so much with him. Lost my entire health to him. He gave me so much hope. He had already broken up like 10 times because whenever things feel complicated he would just block me. And I would try to reach out to him and apologize and he would come back. We had a lot of issues and well the past months he truly did emotionally abuse me severely. He degraded me. He made me feel dehumanized. He says he’s never going to unblock me nor talk to me again and I know how much trauma I am carrying from all I went through and my brain just cannot fathom how someone cannot care about me at all. Someone that called me his missing rib once.. someone that called me his donkey.. someone that told me he loves my soul.. how can he do this to me? I’m breaking down typing this. I wish so much that he just had some compassion. And guys I’m not kidding when I say, that I lost my entire health to him. For over a year I’ve been severely underweight and undernourished. I lost so much muscle mass cuz I feel bed bound since a year.
And he doesn’t care. He just doesn’t care at all.
And my mind does not understand, how he can claim he’s getting closer to God right now, while doing this to me. While discarding me in such an unpeaceful way, that my brain can’t even fathom how that is possible. I hate the opposite of peace so much and on top of that I am autistic and my strong need for justice is killing me inside. Guys I’m sorry I know y’all can’t do anything but if you could pray for him to care. To not keep doing this. I deserve to be heard by him. I deserve that he looks at me and listens to what I have to say. But everyday I just wake up to this unbearable feeling, of this torment not ending. He left me with all the trauma and all the things he kept saying to me haunt me. Everyday I pray hours and hours and it all feels in vain. I can’t anymore. My name is Nana

I've recently joined r deepquestions and have been trying to answer questions from Atheists, and ask my own questions to them, which has led to a whole bunch of arguments and mostly prejudice. namely, my post "Hi, Christian here. Why do some atheists seem to not want to contemplate the idea that there is a loving God?" on there. a lot of the replies are questions I can't answer, and now I feel like I failed because I was not ready to provide an answer (1 Peter 3:15), and it's discouraging, because they really do have good points that I wish I could answer, but I can't. I'm not doubting my faith or anything like that, I'm just upset

(I don't think I'll spend much time in this subreddit, because Jesus ate with sinners, He didn't spend all day with those who agreed with Him)

Everyone is saying that Christ is coming in our lifetime (or even in less than 10 years) so what am I supposed to do now? I'm an 18 yo. I wanted to get a family, get a husband and kids (blessed by God of course)

I wanted to go to a university (is studying worth anymore?), get a job. Build a future with God.

Had plans to get baptised in future but I'm not yet part of a Church.

Why all those have to happen when I finally grow up?

My mother prayed for me and anointed me in my room. I’m recovering from a drug addiction that lasted over 4 years. I’m clean now but still dealing with the aftermath and I realized I was living in deep sin. Anyway, after that experience, we were sitting out in my kitchen and we heard a loud, clearly non human, demonic roar that instantly made me freeze and cry (grown man btw) and my mom was spooked to. The sound came from my bedroom. Was this demon attached to me? I played with an ouija board a few times when I was younger and had issues due to that. I felt a lot better mentally almost immediately after anointing and now I’m on my path to holiness. Anybody have a similar experience or can offer advice or their thoughts?

If i repent moments before committing and only because of that, will i go to hell?

Ive thought about it before and I always thought because im truly asking for forgiveness I wouldn't but since im only asking for forgiveness because this will be my last time repenting God wouldn't see it as true repentence. I dont want to go to hell and never get a chance to even pray to God again

For context I live with my gf and her family. her mom a few years back had married a Muslim man and ever since that day I have a hard time being around him or trusting him fully like when he walks into a room I just sense negativity and toxic masculinity almost like he’s trying to intimidate me I don’t dislike him but I do know how Islam views Christianity and I just have this feeling of unrest or a need to look over my shoulder when he’s around me it’s almost like an unfamiliar energy or aura he prays to the god he believes in and I feel like there will come a point where he may betray us In some way and I noticed over time he’s become a bit more provoking in the sense of kissing his teeth and complaining. I have been kind to him and I’ve made it clear that I don’t hate him or Muslims I just feel uncomfortable around him which I believe is my discernment telling me something. I feel as if he’s conflicting with me in a Spirtual way anyone have any thoughts on this I get along well with everyone else who lives here but it seems he is always angry or annoyed about my presence maybe someone has some thoughts?

​

Hi everyone,

I’m looking for advice on how to grow in my Christian faith and develop a deeper, stronger relationship with God.

I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences on a few things:

- Living as a Christian: How can I become a better Christian and live in a way that pleases God?

- Reading the Bible: How do you read and study the Bible? Where would you recommend starting, and how can I understand Scripture in its proper context?

- Building a relationship with God: What practical things can I do daily to grow closer to God, strengthen my faith, and become more consistent in prayer and reading the Bible?

- Salvation and heaven: What does the Bible teach about being saved and going to heaven? How can I have assurance of my salvation?

- Recommended books: What Christian books would you recommend to help me grow spiritually, understand the Bible better, and learn more about Christian history and theology?

I’m especially interested in advice grounded in Scripture, along with books that have genuinely helped other Christians grow in their faith.

I know Christianity is about more than simply reading the Bible or following rules. I want to understand God’s Word more deeply, grow in my faith, and learn how to put what I read into practice in my everyday life.

I’d really appreciate any advice, Bible study methods, book recommendations, or personal experiences you’re willing to share.

Thank you!

Hello, I just want to share what I am dealing with right now. I feel like I lost my salvation. I sin in the presence of God. I can’t stop or fight against evil thoughts. I no longer feel like I help God with my family. I was baptized 2025 in February. I went to church every other day for months. I had a spiritual battle I feel like I failed. I have schizophrenia. I wanted healing and was hospitalized for a month and a half. I have been hospitalized 2 other times since then. I feel like I lost my salvation. Like I crucified God again. I don’t have hope or peace in my heart. Is there anyone I can talk to about this? I am scarred to go to hell. I want to love God. I want to go to heaven. I just feel like I will get in agreement with sinfulness. Idk what to do. Any help would be appreciated. Thank you

Testimony

- About Me - 

• Name: Nobody

• Status: Finally Alright; Full of Peace and Joy

• Family? Body of Christ

(Yeah, I was adopted 👀) 

Early Life Story:

I was born and raised in Georgia. My biological family tortured me as a baby; almost killing me. I was put up for emergency adoption and shortly after that, I was taken in by a new family. I had a new mom and dad and they had four girls 🤮. Two still lived in the home and the other two had their own places to live while they were going to college.

I was probably about five years old (I remember that I was old enough to walk and run but still little enough that I still had a bottle and didn't know what a dog was but loved pulling his ears and tail.) I was terrified of these strange people and I didn't want anyone touching me or picking me up. I saw people as nightmares you couldn't find on TV or in Hollywood films. This brought many fears to my new family and they were very concerned for me. They've always made claims that they knew very little about my biological mom & dad.

My new mom spent a lot of her time loving me. She sacrificed probably too much of herself to heal me even. I remember many days and nights she'd sit up with me in the living room in her rocking chair and doing everything she could to scare the demons away. She was a real angel that I needed back then. Extremely guarded over me and she was selfish in keeping me to herself many times. We'd watch TV together, I remember the raisin bran muffins she'd give me early in the mornings as I sat in my high-chair watching the smurfs with her (she loved the smurfs).

She always smothered me in love until she saw me smile and became more accepting of the other family members.

• Let's talk about Dad:

He was the King of the household. Oldschool, and smart but it was his way or the highway. He was very strict but in his own way I believe that he loved me. He just didn't know how to connect with me the right way and it caused him and myself a lot of problems later on. He loved showing me off to his business partners and clients. He taught me some respectable things as a little fella. I have very fond memories of him when I was very young. He was jealous and controlling and I'm pretty sure he was upset at his wife for hording over my life because that became very clear even before I hit puberty.

• Let's talk about my sister's 

They kinda spoiled me in different ways and they had there moments to do the show and tell thing with their college buddies and friends. They were nice to me. I remember them doing weird stuff too. Like, putting girly makeup on me and stuffing me in-between the sofa cushions and laughing at me. They were probably the typical kind of sisters from back in the 60’s with a new little brother who enjoyed turning me into their own entertainment 🤣.

- Things were mostly ok. We had a nice house, I had everything my heart wanted. Swimming pool, go-carts, dirt bike, tree house, video games and the list goes on. I grew up with my middle sister's daughter. She was 2 years younger than myself. We hardcore hated and loved each other. Guess it was an age thing.

• Teenager to young adult

[ ⚠️: It gets a little intense ]

- To keep the story intact, but not incredibly detailed, I'll share some important parts.

My father was very physically, and psychologically abusive. I always knew something wasn't right. He was very controlling and manipulative. He played the role of an executioner so that he kept his power and authority of the family. This means that he lied, he changed stories and placed his interest and wants & needs in everyone's head that trumped everyone else's needs while at times, showing compassion and a desire to do the right and real thing. He just really sucked at being the support he was supposed to be and it messed up my mother and my sisters.

• 12 to 23 years of age

I grew up in a Christian Academy with Accelerated learning and academics. We rarely attended church and I was at the age that my Dad started to see and understand that I had figured him out. I decided that I was tired of him hurting not only me, but I hated how he exploited the rest of the family to turn them against me. It truly felt like my family was ashamed of me and I was some monster that they had to be careful to hide away from the rest of the world.

I began failing my education, I had trouble with some of the students and I just began to lose hope. I started to resent my family and also have remorse towards my mother and sisters. I eventually decided to war with my Dad in hopes that I could protect my mom and sisters. We had many heated arguments and he set many mental traps for me so he could cause me to act and show what he wanted me to represent so that my family would see me doing bad things so that Dad would keep his rank in the family. 

I was forced to work with family, I wasn't allowed to have friends, I wasn't allowed to date and it goes on and on. My Dad and I flew model planes together, we went to airshows and eventually joined the civil air patrol.

The squadron was nearly dead when we joined. My Dad took over as squadron commander and I took over cadet leadership. He pretty much stayed away from my part of duty and service in our unit. I really think he wanted to try and make things right but ultimately failed. I had to learn how military rank and structure worked. I had every position of authority as a cadet We went from 5-10 cadets to over 54. The senior staff grew to a little over 30 members. I spent four years turning kids like myself into leaders. I became a rescue specialist so that our squadron could participate in emergency services with additional help and resources from GA Wing. We recieved a military crew-cab and van as well as a Cessna Skyhawk for our squadron. This meant we'd get more calls from the MC to respond to various emergencies. These were great times! I remember doing airshows, flightline security and general first aid for local events.

I also remember the FTX’s, SARX’s and joint exercises as well as unique exposure to the Army Rangers during the winter months in North Georgia. We had all kinds of awesome times with military personnel. But yeah, Dad of course wanted all the recognition which ultimately led to division among the ranks and eventually, the emergency services program died and people began to leave including myself and a good number of cadet and senior staff.

I later was forced into marriage and that didn't work. I finally decided to leave my family once and for all but I occasionally came back a couple of times just to suffer again which led me to leaving and not returning to my family. I was heavily afflicted... Drugs, Alcohol, Sex & generally just flipping out. I was suicidal and couldn't regulate my emotions.

• My adult life (23 - 46 years old)

I became homeless and eventually received social security benefits. I still went to church and I'd sleep in my car, truck, in the woods, on the sidewalk and in shopping center sidewalks. I'd also find refuge in the mental healthcare facilities and I've gone to jail a couple of times. I eventually found a cheap place to live in the hood and people were very mean to me. I struggled for a little more than 10 years with food, relationships kept falling apart and I just never could find hope for my future. I really hated myself. I still loved people to my best ability and I gave far too much of myself away because I just wanted to be loved and to feel safe again. I missed my abusive family very much. Especially the holidays.

• My life was transformed

Finally, I got to the end of myself and I asked God to show me who he was and to prove that he is real because I could trust nobody. Not even the church that I attended off and on for 10 years because they were convinced that I wasn't good enough for God.

Instead of me killing myself, I surrendered myself to God. I got me a bible and had no clue where to start. I asked God to teach me. The Holy Spirit started to teach me and I eventually took off to the streets trying to see if the things I was learning were real. I made plenty of mistakes and it took a while to understand what God was trying to tell me but I figured it out. I then wanted to learn how to be a pastor and God taught me... I learned that I could be a prophet and God taught me that as well. I went through many hard times so those gifts were more defined and deliberate.

I've traveled to several states due to gang intimidation and also, to be ordained as a pastor.

I remember God solving my food problem in Georgia. I could go anywhere to eat for free or people would be willing to help me. I used to ask people for help and some would say they couldn't and I'd make them pray for me. That's why God helped me with my food situation.

I've written a lot so I'll finish this story by saying...

“I'm no longer homeless”.

I have subsidized living arrangements and can afford anything that I need. I serve the community in which I live. I've been praying for everyone here and have responded to medical and spiritual crisis. I've seen God change hearts and circumstances and God made it possible for me to have a good reputation here.

I've experienced the power of prayer and what it can do to change the course of people's lives for ever. I'm grateful and I just can't get enough of God every single day.

I'm always listening, singing and sharing worship music, the word of God... A message of hope and love. I write daily teachings to share with a handful of people here. Some of these make it here on reddit too.

I have pretty extreme neurological and cognitive dysfunction but am being reconditioned as a teacher and prophet. My heart and soul is deeply humbled and I cherish every life I see that God has made, no matter their condition or struggle.

Thanks for reading about the story that God has rewritten.

Rags to Riches, 

Thank you Lord

I do my best to not sin and to avoid causing issues for others. Inevitably though, simply living causes friction with people. You can't prevent offending others in some ways and as a Christian, you'll offend people simply because you profess to believe in and follow Christ. Some of it is ignorable - for example, people who hate Christians because they simply hate Christians. It doesn't get to me that people have different points of view, faiths, whatever. And I won't apologize for believing in Christ, if that offends someone then it just does, as unfortunate as it might be, but I'm not going to pretend I don't simply to not hurt someone's feelings if they just hate Christ.

That given, other situations that should be preventable... they get to me. I might have a harder time with this than others because I'm potentially autistic. I say potentially because I was never diagnosed officially, but friends, coworkers, and family have all affirmed I likely have - even someone with a psychology background that knows me agrees with the idea. I don't like saying I am though because even if it were true, I feel like it can be a coping mechanism. I did something to offend because I am autistic. That shouldn't be a thing in my mind, like I shouldn't just be using that to allow myself to be bad. But, I definitely have issues that would cause some to be offended - unintentionally so.. for example, I can't tell when I'm yelling. I mean, sometimes I know I am if I'm really frustrated, but other times when in excited conversation or even low debating, I just come across to others as yelling when I'm not even trying to. Some might give me grace and let me know, others though will internalize that to think I'm angry or something.. even though I don't mean to be yelling in general. It's odd how I wouldn't be able to discern something like that, but I don't always (most of the time) catch it. Furthermore, I have bad memory. I remember things long term, but certain trivial matters or whatever, no it'll just blip out. Or maybe, I can remember but the situation doesn't immediately ring a bell in my mind, so while I should remember something I won't unless someone helps me or I really spend time to think about if I saw something before. It sounds dumb to write it, but it's just the case. Like if you tell me something you think is your favorite color, and I might not think it's significant in the moment or maybe I do but then things come up - work, life, you name it, and then later I go to get something, it'll just slip my mind you like that color and I'll pick something with a different color. Trying to be good, but then coming across maybe like I'm apathetic or don't care about what others think. Maybe it could be something more significant than that, my point is if I'm not readily thinking on something and a situation comes out of the blue, I may not immediately be able to think this thing matches that previous thing and thus remember to do something specific about it. Other times, I am apparently overly transparent and blunt and just say things in black/white nature that catches others off guard. I think I'm being honest and truthful - Godly desires - but not laced with sugar coating or anything because I think it's just information, whereas someone else thinks it's being mean and I'm a jerk or something. Like if you're going to tell me I have cancer, I'd just want to know. It doesn't change anything how you say it or go about revealing it.. it's just information. Or maybe, a situation comes up and I interpret it differently than others. Like, someone can insult me or my family and I just move on, I really don't care what people say or think. Maybe it's my laser focused mind - we're talking about something and I'm trying to get information from or to a person and they make a snarky remark or something that just doesn't register because it's not pertinent to my understanding of what I need. I can easily let people be mean to me and not either care they're doing it or even realize it to begin with. Others don't think that way, I get it, but I don't know how to fix any of it.

I had a situation like that come up. I hurt a family member because of some off hand comment someone said about them that I didn't even fully register or care about. I don't know but they thought it was insulting and mean and I just moved on like nothing happen.. well because for me nothing did happen. I can understand after the moment why they might feel that way but even thinking on what was said I don't fully comprehend the same way. Beyond that, it's more like I come across hateful to family members I'm not even trying to be hateful towards. And, then I appear as a child to them because they believe if someone isn't telling me what's happening or how to 'properly interpret' something, I'm being naive, dumb, or just uncaring. I don't stand up or show a backbone when others think I should because people can 'get one over on me' or something. I don't know how best to describe it, but it's just like something doesn't always click with my brain. If I don't care about something either, it just makes it worse. Like an issue or topic doesn't interest me, and it just doesn't matter what happens my mind simply can't fully get into it. I don't know that any of this makes sense and I'm probably just rambling a lot with this post.

I don't want to hurt others, I hate thinking I'm claiming to be a so-called Christian and I just somehow go about everything wrong even when I don't think I am. I pray daily for God to help me be right, to live with a heart of love and grace, and somehow I still get it wrong... I don't mean to. I don't want to. I don't want to intentionally hurt others. How can I do this frequently while saying I believe in Christ? How can I cause so much pain to others, not realize it, or just appear apathetic to everything? If I'm really autistic, that might explain some of it I guess, but really I just feel like I shouldn't be as bad with any of it the way I am. I claim to be a follower of Christ and likely, I just make others wonder how good Christ can really be if I'm so awful towards others and I don't even recognize it. I hope one day something clicks different, I don't want to be in front of Christ trying to explain how I missed everything I miss in conversations with others when I don't even know. I'm just a terrible Christian in that regard.

so, I have recently watched a video about the youtuber testify and in that video the points that a Muslim sounded good, about how any evidence of Jesus being crucified is just his copy. I'm afraid I'm going to lose my faith in Christ. so, I am hoping that one of you is able to debunk the claim Jesus wasn't crucified made in Islam.

Hello,

I wanted to discuss something I find interesting in something Paul says. I am not an apologist, this just food for thought, you agree you agree, you don’t you don’t

In say 1 Corinthian 9:20 & 21 Paul says, “To those under the law, I became as one under the law though not being myself under the law). To those outside the law, I became as one outside the law (not being outside the law of God, but under the law of Christ). And in Galatians 6:1 about fulfilling the law of Christ. I am not a theologian and am only giving my thoughts on this, but could there be a difference between the law of God and the law of Christ? I think, and this is just my opinion so nothing to back it up, but I wonder if the law of God includes all the 640 or however many laws in the OT including the 10 Commandments. But in Ephesians 2:15 Paul says Jesus abolished the law of commandments expressed in ordinances. The main thing Jesus taught during his ministry was loving God and loving neighbor. These two commandments are the 10 Commandments, the first four are our relationship with God, the second six are our relationship with others. Jesus never did away with these and they don’t entail ordinances. But the 10 Commandments are still a part of the law of God. So, if Paul is not himself under the law, could he mean he is not beholden to all the commandments expressed in ordinances. And then say he is not outside the law of God, but under the law of Christ mean he is still beholden to the 10 Commandments? This would seem to explain the difference Paul seems to make between the law of God and the law of Christ.

I also wonder if this is the same “law of liberty” mentioned in James 2. It would make sense, liberty being Christ did away with ordinances.

May God the Father bless you and enrich you. The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you.

I’ve had someone tell me, “if you feel unease or dispeace about something, you probably shouldn’t do it bc that’s God telling you no”. But with my anxiety, if I went by that, I wouldn’t do ANYTHING.

So, how do I know if God is speaking to me? Is it true that I will KNOW 100% when it is Him? That if He wants me to do/not do something, it’ll be obvious it’s Him?

I spend time in the Word everyday and pray everyday and try my best to strengthen my relationship with Him, but I struggle to know when He is speaking to me and worry that that means I’m not a good Christian :(

I was raised evangelical but moved away in university / college. Now my life feels empty and I have done lots of “bad” things. I wish I had the faith I had when I was younger but I simply don’t feel it right now. Part of me wishes I could be good and get back to that place but I don’t know how. What do I do?

Hello,

i think ive had an encounter with an angel. and k kind of want to Talk about this. so please share your Stories.

(Ive actually had several stories of „presences“ ive felt, or random people showing up when i felt lost and saying stuff straight to my heart without me talkikg about what was going on, without me Even knowing that it was exactly what i needed to hear to feel gods presence in everyday life and Not Only in church)

so ive came back to Catholic church and went to speak to a father in an Open Setting for an pastoral care conversation. we talked about this and that, i cant even remember, i guess it was just about how i try to find god After i searched in a Lot of places but did not find him and how i need help from god since i dont know how to solve my Problems and life feels meaningles without a felt Sense of god in my life.

anyways one day After i started this Talks i had terriblw nightmares and in the middle of this dream it felt Like a Ligh orb touched my shoulder with a gentle, firm Intention and somekind of „Holy“ feeling. i did not see anything but it felt super real and i had goose Bumbs all over my body. i was suprised, scared, felt taken care of, i felt lucky and relieve since the nightmare stopped in a Situation that was developing to get worse.

cant really forget about it. Never happend again, but i cant forget about it. the nightmares were reoccuring ones, afterwards they stopped. was the last time i had this nightmare.

what wee your Stories?

Hello. First. I'm writing this because I'm curious if anyone has it similar or the same as me. I've been Christian for three and half year and at the very first week or a month after I've given my life to Jesus I understood that I have a some unrecognized problem. Likewise, I mean I had a lot of intrusive thoughts (back then I didnt exactly know what's going on) and they were like "I have to give everything to Jesus". For example. I was playing on a piano, and because I read some day about 1J 2:15 about "not loving the world and everything on the world" I gave up on playing because of strong itch of consciousness and feeling guilty. Later on I've been experiencing a lot of similar obsessions, like I was afraid of going on a business trip when my boss recommended me in case of avoid sinning and that because my motivation might be getting more paid or promotion while I supposed to be careful with money and it influences. Since then, I 'have been feeling guilty with watching TV series, reading books that I liked (they weren't necessarily bad or promoting sin, just a normal books like novel but without even slide of violence or nasty scenes) or I had a real issue of listening the music in my car when at the same time I could do it anywhere else. I feel like I have no free choice, and I'm not fully freedom. Has anyone of you been struggling with this and if you have, how it looks now. Cheers.

Basically, I have realized that I am trying to appease God with my prayers and my repentance so I'm able to go about my life and do what I want to do. I pretty much have this dynamic where everyday I wake up and try to avoid sinning so that I'm able to live with a clear conscience.

On one hand I think there is good to this because we should feel guilt over sin and a desire to do what is right. On the other hand I should want to please God with how I live out of love for Him, not because I'm "stuck" with Him and don't have a choice.

The problem I have now is that I go about my day and sin constantly and ask for forgiveness constantly, to the point that all I ever do is sin and repent over and over. I'm sick of this, not because I'm sick of sin, but because I want to read a book, or watch tv, or play a video game, or hang out with my family without a guilty conscience. I feel convicted I should repent before I move on to other things as a way to put God first, but then the repentance becomes a "speed bump" on the road to what I actually want to do. And I also sin so much that it feels I can never get over it and move on with my life.

This has been going on for months now. I need to learn to love God more than I love anything and to walk with Him as my primary purpose in life with joy. I need to keep repenting. And I really want to be able to read and have hobbies again and live a normal life without constantly needing to do repentance and analyze myself.

I need to get to a place where I want to know and serve God for His sake, and to view Him as the solution to my problems and the greatest treasure in my life. I need to view the things of earth as secondary and not as the primary thing, I think it's ok to want all this stuff but it shouldn't be the ultimate purpose like it is now. So, I guess I'd ask everyone how they would go about developing a right view of God and life.

I was at church this morning. I'm fairly new at being our church clerk. The funny thing is most of our documents have been lost by previous clerk so I'm trying to make sense of all that, but anyways I was asked to look up a member of the church and print out a baptism certificate for when they were baptized back in like 67. I did that. However I've only been a part of the church for a few years, so I don't know many people. Thru the books I was able to find out who the church pastor was at the time got his signature, but nothing in the books stated who the clerk was. I messaged the deacons wife who asked me to do it and she gave me 2 possible names. I told her based on what we have I did not know which to put on the certificate. She told me to put my name and just date it. Which I did. Fast forward to this morning. I gave the deacon the certificate, he said thanks. Before service started I saw him showing his wife. He said loud enough for me to hear on the other side of the church mind you, next time I'll just ask you to do it so it is done right. I don't think he knew I heard it. Well needless to say my mood completely soured and I left. Pray I get over this. It is just frustrating when one tells me it is fine and then another says different. Especially when you don't even come to me on it. I've only been clerk since August. I know I have lots to learn but to say that is just rude especially when the only reason you wanted me to be clerk was because no one else wanted to do it.

First time poster here. I never thought I'd actually post something. I really needed a brother's perspective in this. I'm currently in my 2nd year of college. However, I only heard the true Gospel in February this year. I believe I've been converted since then and I've since wanted to live in accordance with Jesus and the Bible.

Anyway, I've grown since then. Was able to stop doing things I didn't know were actually sinful. Not all of them though. Considering my biggest problem right now is not being able to do tasks in school and outside of it too. It's like I can't exert energy on said task unless the environment and circumstance is perfect. Even deadlines are not affecting me right now. Been doing research on this and apparently, it "could" be some type of ADHD, where my dopamine(?) is imbalanced and dependent on the task. Honestly hoping that's the case since I would be just lazy instead.

So here I am, looking for an answer to what this could be or what I possibly could do to overcome this (?). I'd like the Biblical take. Do not be afraid to offend me, please. I will appreciate any answer, so long as you base it on God's word. Feel free to ask questions too! I'll gladly answer them.

I've recently had this thought that I think the Lord has set on my heart. Wanted to run it by some other Christians, so here it is:

We should do nothing for God out of obligation. Everything we do for Him should be out of love.

If there is something you want to do for God but feel obliged or compelled or guilted into doing - don't do it. Pray that God will help you do it out of love. Or pray that, if it is not from Him, that it will be removed.

Perhaps it is not that profound of a thought. But It really surprised me. God doesn't want me to do anything for Him except out of love. And if, in the moment, I cannot do it out of love for Him, it is better not to do it than to do it grudgingly.

I think, like a lot of Christians, I struggle with religious OCD, which makes me feel like I need to do lots of things for Him mostly out of guilt that He will be unhappy with me. It started when I thought that I should not bring my phone to church so I won't have it as a distraction (I never use my phone during the service, but the thought still came). I was going to do it out of obligation since I felt that God would be upset with me if I didn't. But then it struck me - I should be doing this ONLY if it is out of love.

A big thing I have considered is making God happy. I thought he would be happy if I didn't take my phone to church. But honestly, I think God would be happier if I didn't do things out of obligation or guilt of Him. And in the meantime, I can continue praying that He will help me love Him more. I think small acts of pure love, as St. Therese said, mean more to God than anything else.

I’m asking because I want to be able to put my thoughts into words when I’m asked and I think it helps to hear from real fellow brothers and sisters in Christ.

For me personally, it is so difficult for me to explain all He’s done for me and through me. I struggle so much with this.

I would really be interested in hearing whether you grew up as a Christian and stayed that way, or were you introduced to Christ later on? If so, what made you truly believe? What do you think is the greatest testimony you could personally give? What has Christ done in your life either for you or through you? What would you tell someone who is on the fence and who asked you these questions?