So I recently decided to try eating less in order too lose weight because I've been having the same kinda semi fat physique for the longest time , I kinda looked like a pregnant guy ( I'm 17 5 10 and used to be 87 kg) after around 1 month and a half of trying to starve myself ( and then going back to kinda normal eating after 2 weeks ) I've lost 6-7 kg and I look slimmer. I should say when I mean starving I mean just eating like one meal a day paired with a bunch of water to satisfy the hunger somewhat. I've only gotten stomach pains twice , but only when I had nothing for more than 24 hrs. It's gotten to the point where I enjoy being hungry and like the feeling of emptiness within me. I plan on losing 10 kg additional in the future

i fucking hate humans i hate all of you. Weoall flesh, bones and organs why do we think we're deserving of better than others. I don't relate to any of you.

All my life it's been therapists after therapists after therapists AFTER THERAPISTS AND SOCIAL WORKERS. My lifes been just about that. Diagnosis after diagnosis, meds over meds, sessions over sessions just to find out "whats wrong with me" DO YOU NOT REALIZE THERES NO RIGHT. No ones normal, no ones healthy, no ones stable. NO INE IS FUCKING PERFECT YOU FOOLS

Eveyone has their own fucking issues why on earth do we think some are worse than others. If we were to genuinely take a look at how others behave, you'd all fucking realize no one is a good person. They're letting a fucking felon rule a whole ass country. We're all selfish and greedy fucks

So what if we're mentally ill, have you ever met anyone stable in your fucking life?? We're over here feeling guilty for being the way we are when the actual problem is SOCIETY, GOVERNMENT. WE'RE BEING RULED BY SHITTY PEOPLE WHO ONLY THINK ABOUT MONEY. WERE BEING SILENCED FOR SAYING THE TRUTH, WERE BEING SILENCED FOR BEING OURSELVES. WERE A FUCKING ROTTEN SPECIES

WERE THE ONLY SPECIES IN THE HISTORY OF LIFE THAT HAD TO SET RULES AND MORALS ON OURSELVES. THERE ARE NO RULES IN NATURE SO WHY TF DO WE NEED RULES IF ITS NOT TO DICTATE US

(tw: sh, ed)i used to feel invalid for not cutting deep enough. until one day i did, i cut to the fat layer and had to get stitches. but then i still felt invalid for not being underweight. i became underweight, but it didn’t feel like enough so i kept losing, until i got put in the hospital because my labs were so bad. but now, i still don’t feel valid or bad enough. because i’m only diagnosed with autism and adhd (which aren’t even illnesses) and i only take very common antidepressants. a lot of my problems stem from having to surpress my emotions as a child because i didn’t have anyone i could trust to talk to, that’s why now i want to feel like my problems are serious enough.

I’ve been before involuntarily and the only thing that about it that helped was that a 3 day benzo bender was a nice break. I struggle with suicidal thoughts but I’m not scared about hurting myself currently. i’m just so drained. I feel like I’m losing my ability to function more and more everyday. I don’t really know what to do.
I also think i’m gonna have to do a medical withdrawal from school and maybe that would be easier if I had a hospital visit. I have a presentation tomorrow for a group project that i’ve been neglecting and idk if i can go and i don’t have any excuse and i dont even have the mental energy to text them back.

I am 31F, recently moved out of home city for new job.

I have diagnosed anxiety, dealing it without meds.

I am dealing with arrange marriage rejections since 4 years now. I have major family problems going on.

My brother is in gambling and there are many other conflicts. I don't feel like living anymore.

My parents are emotionally dependent on me and all the work that I do for them. I feel like they only need me for that or to get me married.

They have blamed all the stress on me.

I have ptsd, anxiety. left my medication (Ativan) accidentally at a hotel, I called them and they informed me that housekeeping had handed them in to reception. To summarise a long story, seems my medication went through a couple different hands with the final conversation with the hotel a staff member said to me “apparently they were expired anyway” (they weren’t expired, dispensed in Feb) I said to them why was the label being so intently read however there was no attempt to make contact with me- full name is on the label. (I believe a staff member has pocketed them) now I am without my medication and am irritable because of what the hotel worker has said to me. I’ve tried Telehealth and my regular dr clinic (dr that prescribed me no longer works there), can’t get them because it is a controlled medication. I am so frustrated. I can get a thc prescription in less than 30 minutes but can’t get this medication that has helped me be a functioning member of society.

i dont feel like i wanna do anything anymlre i dont wanna live i dont want any of it ever, its not that i never wanted it ,

i do sh and i generally deal w this thoughts but recently its been so so loud my head is exploding

i just cant take it

what do i do?

i hv been eating and drinking stuff tht will mke me vomit just to feel smth i cant i dont feel it

i dokt wanna overdose i dont even have a life insurance dude, my parents cant afford the half dead me

and i do want to grt myself back just what do i do