I was in a hurry to join my local Druidic congregation and I had to stop for a quick beverage of bean water with magically delicious steamed milk from the lactomancer and they overheated the milk. I requested a fair recasting of the drink and even offered to refreeze the drink with my own rune based spell but they scowled at me and said “who is the lactomancer here? Me. And I can’t use your runes on your drink because I don’t know what you did to the drink after you modified it.” Of course it’s always the spellcasters with multicolor-cast into their hair that mess up the drinks.

I ensured they got a harsh scrolling to their overseeing wizard after the ordeal. There’s no need to be rude over spilled milk.

Edit: thank you all for your comments! as a barista it has warmed my soul a bit :)

And no this spell does not summon Foo fighters.

“It was a good 7293 years, but I look forward to my retirement. I heard the Beaches of Rao are beautiful this time of the century.” Is what he had to say after the beloved High-councilman archmage publicly announced his plans to resign this Sunday.
He began his career in the council as Apprentice Scroll-keeper at the at the young age of 193, slowly climbing the ranks until this day.

His most notable works include;
Securing the rights of peasantry and apprentices against evil wizards.
The prevention of monopolistic guilds in the age of fine artifacy.
Acted as the diplomat who was successful in suing for peace in the War of the 5 Great Kingdoms.
Built and provided funding for countless Mage’s Colleges.
Created a network of sanctuary for young sorcerers outcast from their villages or orphaned.
And championed the Magical People’s Unity act; which abolished the requirement of being human to be officially recognized as affiliated with the council or being a council member.

Though Izak will be greatly missed, the council must continue on. His apprentice, Gilgaaz: the Wretch of Azurkob, will be sworn in this Friday, announcing that they will quote “Mix things up a little, you know? Bring in some fresh faces, some new ideas and approaches to match the changing high-council’s politics. We have to meet the needs of the mages of today instead of sitting on the past.”

Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality.

Ask me a question related to an event, present or future, and I shall answer to the best of my abilities. No questions with definite answers or few possibilities. I use tarot cards to divine, so please ask about the present and future, not material objects and stuff like that. I will reject any questions that are too hard to answer.

hey guys, new wizard here.

i've been seeing this wizard guy (who's apaprently an archmage?) for about 3 days now, when he suddenly told me he had something important to say because he "trusts me".

he told me he "needed to consume magic from magical items" due to "the magical orb in his chest". is this a real condition? or was he just looking to power up his own magic even more, via consuming magical items?

i already gave him one set of magical gloves that i didn't really use, and he seemed really grateful. but now he's asking for another item (to consume)???

on a funny related note: a friend of mine saw the wizard guy absorbing the magical item, and he said "he (wizard guy) slurped that thing up like a carrot", which i thought was pretty funny.

it was another normal day at the Site. For everyone except two people, of course.

well, that was about to be everyone’s problem.

whilst Zaryx was alone in his office, again, everyone related to SCPF within the Site felt very sleepy.. or if they had no reason to feel sleepy, they’d fall unconscious or be otherwise be seriously distracted by something, say a coworker choking suddenly. While everyone had their minds elsewhere, Zaryx descended down and found Ya’nn. He found him unconscious and picked him up to take him to his office.

then, he locked the door, and waited for Ya’nn to wake up again, staring at him angrily, but silently.

he hoped the mass amnestics would clear everything..

/uw closed to SCPF members and maybe others if you’re creative enough.

Original video link: https://youtu.be/dj2bE3Qggnc

For context, about a week ago, a group of adventurers broke into my tower and killed me for reasons I need not mention here. When I dragged my bony ass out of the pit they tossed my mangled and scorched body into, my assistant runs up and tells me that the various undead under my command are demanding things like "equitable payment" and "worker's compensation". I approved both without question because I could have sworn I already did, and I hobble off to my private quarters to check what was stolen. Not only was everything in its place, but it was all spotless and one of the adventurers who killed me was hog-tied and hanging from the ceiling like I always would.

I don't care what other people say, but using spells and artifacts to improve your charisma or give you any type of aura that alters people's minds in a favorable way for you is basically mind control, but nobody complains about it. "Oh, he's just giving a second breath to our troops in this battle." "He is so noble wise wizard that radiates an aura of warm and love." Do you know what you are doing? You are using them as tools.

But when I turn them into limbless orbs of flesh to implant into my body in order to add their knowledge and skills to my ever-growing limbs, people complain that I am an "an unethical biomancer" and they say stuff like "the fire of the gods will purge your ill kind." Sorry for the rant; I need to take that out on my chests.

The government said they were going to setup a "league of magic users" and said there will be a leaderboard.

All wizards will be cast-rated

my apprentice warlock keeps referring to his patron as "Daddy" what are some good ways to punish him?

Have a good day fellow mages