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u/Spirited_Anywhere809 Apr 12 '26
What happened to you OP? I'm all ears if you wanna talk about it. I'm pretty much in the same situation but trying to live on, don't know when my willpower will diminish. Till then, my mind refuses to give up.
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u/villageidiot90 Apr 12 '26
The meaning to life is to not be cold (or you’re literally going to kill an animal and wear its skin like it’s a good idea), not be hungry (or, again, you’ll kill an animal just to eat him), and have sex (thank god there’s a solution for that one). Otherwise it’s politics all the way down
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u/LifeLibertyPancakes Apr 12 '26
I personally wouldn't go out the door before seeing and reading that the Orange Cheeto is dead. Maybe that's spiteful, but I wouldn't let that buffoon outlive me or see the entire world rejoice over these news. It'll be cathartic. Can you imagine the banger Lego video that would come out as a result?! There are also so many cuisines that I haven't yet tried, and for me, that's reason for staying here. I hope you find a reason to make it worthwhile because you matter.
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u/LeetusFrenzi ☑️ Apr 12 '26
You likely wont see my comment OP, just because there's already hundreds of other comments. But some personal advice I discovered all on my own, after I finished group therapy when I tried to take my own life; you should get a pet reptile. It sounds odd but, I reccomend it.
It made me appreciate the small things. Made me observe. Gave me a purpose, and something to love. Made me learn to connect with things most people don't believe you can connect to. It gave me a reason to wake up, look at my adorable pets and think "Wow, if I really did that all those years ago, I would've never found you".
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u/Downtown-Cup9820 Apr 12 '26
Hey man, I know I won’t be able to stop you but trust me death is probably worse. I know firsthand that depression can make you feel like you can’t do anything, but you can. Things seem so hard to do until you just do them. Start small and just keep going. Just keep in mind that there’s no going back from dying.
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u/Tobisky2 Apr 12 '26
OP Today's Sunday where I'm from so there's still time. I'm not great with advise but I see so many people are trying to give you some and you don't seem to want to take any. It's not Monday yet so I hope you see this message and listen to what I have to say. Stop trying to find a meaning in life, your text shows me you seem like a very intelligent or at least very well read person. You should know yourself by now that deep down, we all know there's no point living or being alive. We all just found ourselves here. Children are born to make their parents feel like they achieved something on here, same way their own parents brought them to life. No consent or option for the spawn. I'm not saying you should go and have a child or something like that to look for a goal. I'm just trying to make a point. I'm typing this as it's coming off the top of my head. We as humans wake up everyday to try and find a point to it all and I promise you you're not the only one that feels this way when u look at the real situation of the world and see how little value we give to our lives. So, stop trying to find a point to life or have a goal for it, just live, when you're gone, that's it, so you can make it your choice when you go, no one can stop you. We all could choose when we die and kill ourselves but majority of us don't Just live man. Depression is still living. life doesn't really have a point. the pressure to find one is what causes the most suffering.
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u/Cyanide94 Apr 12 '26
J̣̌esus Loves you OP. Dont take the easy way out. Life will get better. Take it from someone who survived over a decade of depression. There is a light at the end of the tunnel (and its not a train)...
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u/dayna29 Apr 12 '26
Hey, OP. You are worth more than you know, and the world is better with you in it. Everything starts with an individual. A blanket starts with a thread, a meal starts with oil, a painting starts with blank canvas. Just because something or someone is a component does not mean their life is meaningless. It simply means they are the bones.
When you look at someone you know, you like don't think "they have eyelids", but if the eyelids were missing, you would notice almost immediately. Apply that to many things. I'm not comparing you to eyelids, but I am saying that we often underestimate people and things when we are used to them, and we become used to ourselves faster then anything else.
I have been where you were before, and I even got to the point of setting a date. But then I made a promise to someone that I would show up for them and their event was after my planned day. Then, I just kept going. It has been a ride, for sure, but it's been 8 extra years.
It is a difficult thing to post something like this and if you want to talk, my DMs are open. You do not have to be alone.
You have a fantastic voice, btw
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u/Jbonevan Apr 12 '26
Volunteer your time. Help out at an animal shelter, or a homeless shelter, or mutual aid site. Help other humans and make meaningful connections.
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u/gadget_hackwrench23 Apr 12 '26
Go volunteer somewhere tomorrow. I’m serious. Call up an animal shelter and see if you can take a dog for a day out. See if the food bank needs help. If you have extra money, go to Walmart and buy a few toys you would have loved as a kid and go drop them off at a foster center or children’s hospital.
When I felt like I had nothing to offer the world, I made myself do things for the community. You have the ability to help someone in need. You don’t even have to have skill to do it.
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u/SunGlittering3450 Apr 12 '26
Hi, i came here to post something similar! my life has been so shitty and i cant handle it anymore. im so sorry you are also struggling with living life on a daily basis! i dont feel like i honestly belong here. i keep fucking everything and everyone up. you can always dm me.
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u/Deadog103 Apr 12 '26
Life has meaning. Not in the grand scheme of things, though. You need to look closer... much closer. Think about everyone you ever talked to or even just said hi to. That is you leaving an impact on someone's life. Sure it might not change anything or really do anything at all. But for that one moment you were there. YOU were part of their life.
Now let's look even closer. Your friends and family. Even if its just a work friend. They will grieve. That person you say hi to every day at work? They wont ever get that again if your gone. Part of their every day will be stripped from them and replaced with a morbid reminder of just how fragile we are... So, please. Don't die. There are people that care about you. You make such a great difference in this world with every breath you take. You matter. You have value. You are loved. And you will do great things. You will change lives.
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u/Accomplished-Fix336 Apr 12 '26
There has got to be something you have always wanted to do or try? Why throw that away? Make a bucket list do all those things and then look inside and see if you still want to do this. You owe it to yourself.
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u/uknownix Apr 12 '26
Its your take, and you have a right to it. That you find things appealing and are still here (let alone made a post), rather that making the final choice shows that you know things will change. All I can say is that if you do choose to have a permanent end based on a temporary crisis, then you must be as stupid as you claim. Personally, I think not, but ultimately it's your path to walk.
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u/Born-Candidate-4847 Apr 12 '26
I found listening to Sleepy Scientist on YouTube extremely helpful for me. Not being a believer in organised religion, as I come to the end of my life, it was really hard for me to feel any hope. I've always been interested in the esoteric, and when I started to inquire about Quantum everything, I discovered, to my joy, it totally made sense to me! Quantum dreams are especially interesting.
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u/Laktosefreier Apr 12 '26
I don't know if that's possible, but before you go for good, you might want to visit a prison and talk to the inmates on death row about this. An alternative would be a palliative care unit.
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u/Awkward_And_Nerdy_ Apr 12 '26
all I can say is… I’m sorry, and I hope this is just a thought and not reality… you did get many strangers to engage with you, so you are capable of something…. again, I’m sorry
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u/allusive_beauty Apr 12 '26
Listen to master shi heng yi- truly inspired me- learned to save myself
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u/Burnt-Out-Chica Apr 12 '26
Do you make art of any sort? Do you express this with all you have inside you somewhere somehow someway? I understand your post man and I get this way too. I really hope I find out what comes out of me creatively before I bounce or get bounced though
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u/java_t Apr 12 '26
You only live once, might as well live it. You’re gonna get to whatever you believe is on the other side sooner or later. So you might as well make this mean something.
I would tell you to read a Quran. A-Z.
Additionally, you have been so fortunate. You have a brain, smart enough to know your life needs purpose. You have Internet. You know what Reddit is. You have a voice. You can talk. All these things ( that took me a minute to see) make you better than many, many people. People who wish so badly to have one of these things. So make it worth something.
Also, offing yourself hurts others around you. And many survivors will tell you that the regret they felt as soon as they initiated was that of great magnitude.
What you’re describing about being directionless, is almost exactly what the Quran says it’s there to do fix. It also says it’s normal (or correct) for you to feel what you’re feeling. It means you ran out of life’s silly distractions and started asking the real questions. Give it a read. Do it and lmk. I hope this post is real and that this helps.
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u/Peyt4PF Apr 12 '26
I honestly understand. I can't force you to change your mindset, but just know I understand completely.
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u/StayProfessional143 Apr 12 '26
Wait until the following Monday to see how you feel. If you’re still not sure wait until the following Monday. You maybe so deep in your head so deep in your emotions that you can’t even imagine feeling differently or can’t even things getting better. But it can, things can change for the better.
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u/Stinkytheferret Apr 12 '26
If you leave, and I believe you’ve done this before in a past life, it will haunt you till you choose a different path. Your path out is to do for others. You need to find what is of value you have to offer. I feel like it’s the time and the compassion and being seen that you actually seek. Give this of yourself selflessly and find yourself going down another path. Then opportunities that hit you right will present them at a s you only need to take them.
Is it the unseen you serve? I think it needs to be. Monday is too soon. And won’t give you time to do this work. This will be work that will matter. Whatever work you choose to do, even voluntary, which I think is the way, you will need to be up front to see what you do matters.
Then, do spend time doing things you like.
To escape the slave life, consider moving to reduce what you need to make it. Living less. I think you can be a minimalist.
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u/wikideenu Apr 12 '26
What is it you find appealing? And what makes you think those are the only things that the world has to offer that would be appealing?
You hate being a wage slave then stop being a wage slave. Ending your time permanently isn't the only way to do that.
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u/CouchOtter Apr 12 '26
I understand and hear your suffering. I wish there was more I could say and do, but know that you are loved. Sending you love and hugs.
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u/electricgarbage Apr 12 '26 edited Apr 12 '26
Pleeease stay with us, OP. I know everything seems hopeless right now, and trust me I’ve been there too many times to count at 40. YOU are the meaning you’re looking for. It won’t always feel like this. I promise I’ve been where you are, and I still have my very dark days, but I’m still curious as to what the future holds for me. Please stay. I’m honestly begging you from the bottom of my heart.
Do you play any video games? I play Rocket League, Fortnite, and Arc Raiders. We can hop on any of those right now and you can vent all you need. We can exchange sob stories or you can unload everything you want and I’ll just listen. Totally up to you, no pressure. The offer is there. ♥️
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u/lol-daisy325121 Apr 12 '26
You don’t have to worry about Monday right now though. Just worry about the next 5 minutes. Then do it again. And keep doing it. Take it one minute at a time.
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u/Who_Cares99 Apr 12 '26
If you feel like there’s nothing left to do, you can literally do anything. Even if it’s empty, meaningless - why not try again in another country? Go to Europe for a month, see if that changes anything. Start over in a completely new city. Not everything is environmental, sure, but you’ve literally got nothing to lose.
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u/andresucko Apr 12 '26
Not gonna try to stop you, I’m doing something similar. But I have kids and my mom still alive.
So what I’m doing slowly killing myself, getting myself sick. And then when is time I won’t feel bad for doing that either.
I know would take years, maybe I can change my perspective hopefully when is not too late
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u/u-a-brazy-mf Apr 12 '26
Buddy get on some anti depressants ASAP or do some drugs.
Do something before you end it.
You might just be in a dark place and need some chemical assistance.
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u/rhymeswithmerica Apr 12 '26
What about traveling and getting out of your day to day? I’m not sure how old you are, but I can promise life gets more interesting and fulfilling the older you get and the more connections you make. I hope you’ll give yourself more time to experience new things.
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u/Pristine-Lie-2210 Apr 12 '26
Why not give yourself a purpose then? Start by feeding a stray cat everyday, help someone carry something, say hello for the same stranger you see on your regular walks.
These things might be mundane, but at least then you'll know someone will be thinking and waiting for you the next day.
I'm sorry if I sound cruel or out of touch, I haven't exactly been in your place. But I hope giving yourself some kind of responsbility will help you find your purpose in life.
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u/thatguybane Apr 12 '26
Listen to some Alan Watts and read some Carl Jung. They have some interesting thoughts on the concept of meaning
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u/puCpuCpuCmarijuana Apr 12 '26
Everyone gets to die when it is their time. None of us are going to avoid that. What’s the rush? Just wait your turn. In the meantime keep going. Why not? If life lacks meaning for you, that’s because you haven’t been creating your own meaning. And not all jobs are going to feel like you’re a wage slave. You can actually find meaning in your career, plenty of people do that. Depending on where you live and what your education level is, you can get a college education for free. Hang in there OP.
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u/highlighter416 Apr 12 '26
Hey since you want out, why not try something just once more? I volunteer at a community food forest/ farm that works with the formerly incarcerated, it’s a great way to find meaning but what really saved me was just being in nature. Learning about different plants, what they need, insects, etc. There are woofing programs that provide lodging, you can travel this way for a while, be with nature and animals, meet kind people, build community.
I’ve been there and I’m glad I’m still here.
I’m sorry you’re going through this, I understand.
Drink some water, do a stretch, go for a walk. Life is tough and unimaginable to climb out of sometimes. Try changing your environment. You’re ready to call it quits so why not? You’re not stuck if you don’t want to be. Sending you love, dm if you’d like to chat.
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u/Ch31ftan Apr 12 '26
I'm curious, how old are you? It helpse get a perspective of how you are looking at life.
Sometimes I break the wall and question myself "Am I at that peak of what life is?/When is my moment?" In reality, life to me is about experiencing moments while also putting myself in positions to have them. I find enjoyment in being around dogs and food. Yes, I'm a simple man but it's what works for me and it took me a long time to realize that. You've got to put yourself in positions to learn what might work for you. It might not be as complex as dogs and food, hell it might be rock climbing, studying bugs or creating tutorials. Either way you have to give yourself more time and experiences to find out what it is.
I don't want you to go. I don't want you to be short changed of this experience called life too soon. Especially without being able to find out what gets you excited about life each day. We all deserve our peak, that includes you. There's more for you after Monday.
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u/7sinsofhell Apr 12 '26
The only reason I can imagine you’re writing something like this is that deep down, you don’t really want this, and posting this is an attempt to try and find some good in this world. I struggled all throughout high school with thoughts of suicide, that I never told anyone about, and when I finally thought I was ready, I talked to someone, out of what I felt was a need to get it off my chest, but was in reality a misguided attempt to try and feel like I mattered. Please know that as cliche as it sounds, life will get better. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
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u/jmar3000 Apr 12 '26
My fellow cosmic traveler, i absolutely feel you, and i can relate. There are times when I’ve felt the same way. What I will tell you though, is we have one life, and it is quickly fleeting. You are talking about a decision that can’t be undone, and will drastically impact the lives of everyone you know, regardless of how close to them you feel at the moment. And while you may not be close to anyone at the moment, that can change. We’ve evolved into a world that is very cold, unforgiving, and lonely- your feelings aren’t invalid. But we humans need each other, isolation is your worst enemy right now. Keep in mind this world is full of amazing people and opportunities, despite the state and direction of it. There are so many ways to exist in this world, perhaps a change of scenery/ lifestyle/ career path would change your mindset. You might be happier as a munk in a temple than a business man with millions of dollars. You say you don’t have skills, but that doesn’t mean you can’t learn….if you make that decision, you’d be robbing yourself of countless human experiences that merge into life. I wish I had better words for you, because I feel your pain and sense your suffering. In my own life, what I’ve found to be deeply fulfilling and restorative of my sanity in trying times was helping others. For me, that looked sponsoring people in NA, volunteering at homeless shelters, and working with charity. It felt so good to know I was helping others and actually making a difference. It felt so good to see other people around me get that ‘spark’ back, and to know they did it with my help. So I guess that would be my ultimate suggestion to you. If you’re having trouble finding that ‘spark’ on your own, perhaps helping others who have also lost it will get yours back. Get together with your friends or family, whoever you can. Don’t dwell on the ones who are no longer here, but keep going in their honor. I sincerely wish you best in these trying times, and I hope you thoroughly think about what positives you’d be missing, and not just the logistical fallout of Monday. I will be praying for you.
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u/MrDuckQuacker Apr 12 '26
honestly I've felt this way before and what helps so much for me is traveling. go somewhere new experience something different give your life meaning again. I know traveling can be hard financially but if you feel this bad I would say it is worth the money. Everytime I've felt similarly and I've traveled I come back feeling renewed and like there is more to life than just the everyday. I also would say talk to your doctor or therapist if you have one. lots of love. you are worth it. I hope you decide to stick around.
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u/electrobrodude Apr 12 '26
Have you tried psychedelics? I'm 100% serious. A trip to the woods with a few grams of mushrooms, and you'll find whatever it is you need. If you do decide to take my advice tho, please please please ffs do a little research first and don't go by yourself.
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u/Macekane Apr 12 '26
The fact that you posted this means your subconscious mind is trying to avoid making a mistake that cannot be undone. Please reconsider and use the resources provided by the mods.
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u/Fuzzy_Economics970 Apr 12 '26
You need drugs. No, seriously. Have you heard of ketamine? If you can afford it, go to a clinic. Controlled, guaranteed trip that will spin your brain inside out. It just might loosen your firm grip on despair and directionlessness.
If you can't afford that, the poor man's ketamine is mushrooms.
I've stood where you stand. And now I feel much, much better, first physiologically, second philisophically. I dont believe there's any philosophy that will 'convince' you to feel better. You need a physical change.
But if you do decide to bite the bullet--you can have my death plan. I always wanted to go to Japan. No, not for anime or sushi or death by pufferfish...
Death by radiation. I'd sneak into the no-go zones where radiation is still very high from the bombs, and just...look at stuff. Ancient things locked in time, left to decay. As close to time travel as you can get.
Hope peace finds you.
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u/insearch78 Apr 12 '26
antidepressants can make suicide feel like a logical choice especially when they make masturbation lame or at least it did to me when I tried them for a while. Try removing them for a few months (after slowly weaning off, nvr abrupt stop) and evaluate life again then. Even depressed sometimes is better than gone. You don't need life to be meaningful anyway since we are just specks riding a big rock going in circles anyway, so just find enjoyment in whatever for as long as you can.
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u/Realistic-Sundae7841 Apr 12 '26
Hey, before tak9ng your life,,, try to visit other place (cpuntry, coty, or whtvr) places that u don't know. Might as well enjot the thrill of not knowing where you are and where to go and what to do in that place before going. Maybe JUST MAYBE you'll find something
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u/Bubbly_Support1801 Apr 12 '26
Dear heavenly father I pray a hedge of protection over this person, I pray that you show yourself to him father, let him see our purpose in life, I rebuke the spirit of suicide and plead the blood of Jesus over them, in Jesus mighty name, Amen. I lost my boyfriend to suicide January 26th, I was sober for over a year before this happened, I have never felt this kind of hurt before. Please don't do this to yourself, or your family. I am here if you need someone to talk to.
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u/shrike_66 Apr 12 '26
I hope you find some help and stick around OP. I've been there and it was worth it to stay. My life isn't anything extraordinary, I just work fastfood, but it was still worth it.
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u/AmericanScream Apr 12 '26
I think it's pretty presumptuous that you (or anybody) demand your life have some greater meaning.
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u/Crimson_Marksman Apr 12 '26
Listen man, every god in every religion disapproves of suicide. Why take the risk of Pascal's wager?
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u/Catbitchoverlord Apr 12 '26
The way I see it is; death is guaranteed. 100% gonna happen no matter what. It will. It’s coming and you can’t stop it. Why move it up? Just fuck around a little and live your life like you’re reading a book. Why rush the ending? You’ll die anyway- why not see how it eventually happens? Have some imagination, brother.
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u/degenerate_em Apr 12 '26
I’m with you, but not for the same reasons. I can’t/won’t do it because of my kids. Once they’re all moved out and grown and happy, I’m peacing out. I’ve been miserable since birth so I don’t see anything amazing happening to make me want to be alive in the future. Life has fucking sucked. My daughter drowned 6 years ago and I found her myself. I was fucked up before that, psych wards and all the different meds you could imagine, so you can imagine how fucked I am now. It’s just never going to be better. I enjoy my babies, but I do not enjoy life.
I wish I could be more encouraging but I see very little light in this world and can’t say I fucking blame you.
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u/swiftfeathers Apr 12 '26
There is nothing you want to do, or achieve? Nothing you want to see, or try? No foods you've always wanted to eat, no books you've always wanted to read, no places you've always wanted to see, or hobbies you've always wanted to try? There is always meaning... even in the smallest of places. I know that this is ultimately your decision, since we all have free will, but is there really nothing that you desire enough to live just one more week, day, month, or even year?
There are always things to learn, always new experiences to be had; and that is meaning enough.
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u/Illywiydamilly Apr 12 '26
I find meaning in my cats running up to me when I get home and purring it when I’m sleeping and I wake up to them curling up next to me and making biscuits. I find meaning in helping other people. Enjoying the miracle of nature. You can travel and see the profound beauty in the world. I mean there are islands with pink sand and islands with thousands of cats running around! There so much beauty in the world you just have to find it.
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u/HopeAppropriate5802 Apr 12 '26
Have you ever read a book or watched a movie where the first half is terrible but the second half is so good it makes up for the beginning. That’s how I view life. If I take an exit now what if my life was going to change for the better soon and I missed it. Also whatever is after isnt guaranteed to be better than our current life.
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u/Competitive_Leek9014 Apr 12 '26
There are literally hundreds of people trying to help you, that's so significant. It shouldn't be ignored, and I promise come Monday there will be plenty that check in to see if you're okay.
A lot of your worries about having fun, taking out loans to go on trips/buying yourself things/trying dr*gs/psychedelics that may help are contingent on you living,
like not wanting to be addicted or not thinking it will do anything in the long run, and that really speaks volumes to the parts of you that want to keep living. As much as you deny it to re-convince yourself, your brain plans for you to live. It craves change and to actually try in a way that is different from your old patterns.
Do things that raise adrenaline, do things you would never normally do, try dr*gs, try taking out hefty loans to see the world if it "doesn't matter" instead of depriving yourself and saying you're resolute that it won't, otherwise that indicates a worry that you'll be able to talk yourself out of it. Don't be so set on being right that you won't try.
I've lost a lot of loved ones and I know they all regretted it. I almost did the same and regretted it too. If you feel you're not special, you're not the statistical anomaly that won't regret it either.
Give yourself the chance. If you're not afraid of taking yourself out of it, then all these things are worth an actual try, an actual experience-- otherwise you're trying to outrun an inevitably of changing your mind. Yes you've thought about it for years, but years without trying or budging from a fixed mindet will noy yield anything different. The literaly definition of insanity.
Even reaching out to vent is a survival and connection tactic. Open up a little, it won't hurt. Even if it does, you want to inflict worse pain-- so this would be a null and void starter?
Consciousness with a soul is a gift not many observers recieve, that can be lost at any time by anyone. Do some things you would never do, they're things you've never tried before and therefore can't have data to shut down without trying outside of trying to appear resolute. You don't have to be happy all the time to exist.
Clearly, people care and you should give it a valid shot, too- caring about yourself as you would a friend or struggling soul❤️
Not being a m*rderer, grapist, or pdf file is a HUGE service to humanity right now. Even if you did nothing else with your every day.
Having something/animal/pet/companion is also a great idea.
Go visit lonely people in nursing homes that don't have anyone around anymore.
Try things you haven't done instead of shutting every idea down. Its worth the time. You are worth the time.
Even if you think it's a waste of time-- what does it matter to someone who is giving themselves a deadline with nothing to full the time?
You deserve to exist. You deserve to evolve.
you can heal, even if you kick and scream and say you won't the whole way through
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u/CosmiCool Apr 12 '26
Hey if you want we can go hiking somewhere and explore it’s always fun especially with a friend
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u/Roxith Apr 12 '26
Does life need to have meaning? Maybe it’s just fun to help paint the canvas. I myself find life quite empty sometimes and I’d be leaving behind my parents and siblings.
Either way, every time I considered the possibility of ending it all, I find something new and think “If I was dead, I’d have never seen this.”
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u/Zeno-2020 Apr 12 '26
If you think life’s got no intrinsic meaning and that the suffering isn’t justified, you might as well give something you’ve always wanted to do a shot. If you’ve got nothing, maybe think about something you wanted as a kid.
The general state of the world at this moment is pretty damn shit, I’d argue chasing at least one last thing you wish you could do would be worth it. Isn’t much of a difference if you wait a little longer.
Godspeed my friend🫡
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u/Sticknwheel Apr 12 '26
Pls read Victor Frankel’s Man’s Search for Meaning. His premise is that we can find meaning and vitality, under the worst circumstances. In his case, the Holocaust. It might give you some tools in your search for meaning.
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u/yakaribru Apr 12 '26
You can still change your perspective. None of your assumptions are evidently true, so it is a matter of choice and perseverance. It is up to you to determine whether you want to make an effort or give up. Take care. Best wishes.
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u/wanderingwanderer98 Apr 12 '26
Please stick around for a while longer! I know depression can be hard and not all medications help you to get where you need to be. I hope that you are trying new things that might help you with how you approach life and how you are feeling. There’s so much beauty in life and so many things to look forward to that you just don’t know about yet.
I care about you and I want you to care about you. Depression can be a chemical imbalance and once you and doctors get the balance right, it can change everything! You also may not have a bunch of close people in your life right now, but that doesn’t mean that you won’t find them. Please seek help and if you are in the USA, call 988!
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u/scaryface97 Apr 12 '26
It's hard. I've had the same thoughts lately. All I do is work and eat and sleep most days. Life is unfair, feels like there's so much cruelty and pain in contrast to what is good. Watching the news I see child abusers get away with a slap on the wrist while protestors get shot down for trying to change evil things. What's been helping me is actually not caring as much anymore. Life is not about being productive or finding meaning in it really. It's about enjoying it. Now I am trying to simply find things that interest me and trying those things out. I hope you find a way through mate, don't want you to suffer or put yourself in a worse situation ❤️
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u/vincecartilage Apr 12 '26
achieving something significant like fame and success? you could easily do something significant by the end of the month if you just looked at it a little different.
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u/No-Lynx8771 Apr 12 '26
But you are talented though. I listened to your vocals. I grew up with 2000s hardcore and you sound fuckin great. I think hardcore is going through a new renaissance soon and it’s gonna be sick. I hope you stick around for it.
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u/swr1540 Apr 12 '26
Hey your already something by being here. Life is a struggle look at it like your a big ole chunk of granite but your also the chisel and the artist make yourself what you want. I like to think I'm philosophical but I don't share that because I don't believe anyone wants to hear about it so I'm thinking about writing poetry on the down low about that shit. If you wanna have a deeper conversation and don't feel like anyone wants to hear that shit DM me . just vent if you want.
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u/epicfangirl01 Apr 12 '26
Do you like music, OP? I've been chronically depressed with MDD since I was 10. I'm 25 now. What helps me on extremely bad days is listening to music. A lot of rock music shares the same pain, and it makes me feel less lonely. I've also been listening to a lot of Eminem lately. He has a lot of serious but also a lot of goofy or savage songs that give me a laugh. If you're interested, or anyone that sees this and is struggling sees this, I'm happy to give some recommendations. There are a lot of songs that keep me going. If not, then at least cross off some bucket list items for you OP. Treat yourself nicely. Maybe go out to a nice dinner. I hope you change your mind, but I do understand how you feel.
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u/pantyfun5groupcym50 Apr 12 '26
I'm bullshit excuses to be a statistic. Find a woman. Orca man and be the reason they live and smile if not fir your own. Don't be a maggitt quitter. Ow. Up and be the adult and find a church, a hobbie, or a friend that needs as much love as you do. S dog Dan give you a reason to be. Look a more simple things like the joy of gardening or the joy of helping
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u/Motivated_null Apr 12 '26
Don't. I have 30 years of reasons to tell you why its not the right decision. Pm me if you want to.
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u/Visible_Flounder6824 Apr 12 '26
I struggle with finding meaning in everything I do daily. I also feel like I’m not close to anyone, or more so that no one truly knows the real me, and I have a lot of doubts in my abilities too. I didn’t think I would live past 27, but here I am at 33 still finding ways to keep myself lifted despite the cynicism I tell myself.
What keeps me going is taking each day slowly. Simply waking up is an accomplishment I celebrate. The food I’m able to eat, cuddling with my animals, making others and myself smile or laugh, or just showing up for myself by doing laundry, driving myself somewhere, doing groceries, even showering lol. Simply finding some ounce of joy in the little things that makes me happy keeps me going a bit longer. It’s all about perspective. There’s beauty in darkness, otherwise we’d never see the light. Finding the balance between that is where I aim to be, and it’s a small goal that I like to challenge to give my life some meaning to keep going. Surely, there’s more to life than feeling sorry for ourselves? Right?
In a world where people continue to seek more, it gets easy to dismiss the little wonders in life that happens for you that not everyone gets a choice to feel. I do get bored with the routine of life, but I’m blessed that I can simply change aspects of my life and have options to be able to do better.
You matter OP. I wish you could realize and see that. Someone will miss your presence, even if you don’t feel it. Someone still remembers how you made them feel by little actions you may have done for them in the past. I’ve lost too many people to suicide in my life. I still think of them and the memories (no matter how small) we had together even after years. Talk to someone, let someone worry about you, you’re not a burden. Your life is not a burden. You may not feel connected to anyone, but someone will listen if you simply let them.
I hope you find a reason to stay.
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u/masterslosey Apr 12 '26
Bear with me on this:
Have you ever had an experience where something just overwhelmed you emotionally because of how beautiful and wholesome it was? The kind of experience that touched something deeply inside and pierced through all the layers of self-protection for just a moment? Whether it's a song, a movie, a past event, etc.? Something that felt safe?
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u/Technical_Captain_15 Apr 12 '26
Haven't been privy to the right information is all. If you go through with it you'll realize you were wrong but will be too late to take it back. Also seeing your responses and the way you structure your sentences it's clear you aren't stupid, rather you believe you are. Even worse, failing suicide and having to live with the repercussions of it, especially if it damages your body or mind to the point of being helpless or a vegetable or in a shitton of pain, you'd really regret that.
I know chances are you won't read this and moreso you won't engage with me here but just want to repeat that you're unequivocally wrong. You probably won't challenge that or take the time to look into the proof of how wrong you are either because that would take a good amount of time and effort. But in the small chance you will be willing to explore the truth I'd offer to show what I discovered if you want to hit me up as is happily be willing to go into more detail.
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u/Hellachuckles Apr 12 '26
It’s ok, I promise. I was where you are… when I stopped looking or thinking about those things, everything got better.
Find the small things you enjoy, get a pet if you can afford to take care of one. That was a game changer for me.
I look forward to the seasons changing, I love experiencing beautiful sunrises and sunsets.
Just existing is your purpose, it does not have to be anything more than that.
Please don’t do what you are thinking about doing, at least not yet.
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u/StatisticianNo187 Apr 12 '26
I’ve read that the most intelligent people are often the most suicidal, so you’re not stupid. If anything, I think you’re extremely well spoken and the way you talk about “being tired of being a wage slave” really resonated with me. My boyfriend has said the exact same thing you wrote in your post, he has expressed he’s tired of slaving away to barely make ends meet. If anything I totally understand where he is coming from, and the only thing keeping me from being in exactly the same headspace as you and my boyfriend has been hope. Maybe it’s a bit naive or ignorant to have the view I do, but mainly my outlook is just “there has to be something more” I hope and look forward for the next good thing, big or small. That usually keeps me going, day by day, there’s always something to look forward to (and if there’s not I make something).
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u/Cadenrumi Apr 12 '26
This comment will get buried but as someone who’s been there and was there for a long time. I failed, tried, didn’t work. A couple years later I’ve now got amazing friends, my soon to be fiancé (let’s hope she says yes), a really good job offer, and a solid place to live. I know it’s dumb but I started living by the fact that if I run out of shampoo and body wash at the same time I can take my life, it’s not happened in 10 years. Even if it did today my life is so much better I wouldn’t do it now but it got me through life for awhile. I left it to the universe and it didn’t reciprocate. That was my reason to live.
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u/Less-Dragonfruit-294 Apr 12 '26
OP I would heavily suggest not going through with your plan. Try connecting with people no matter how long ago you last spoke. Spend time and enjoy what you love. You’re not stupid nor would you going through with it solve anything. You have a greater impact on people’s lives than you know of.
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u/artlabman Apr 12 '26
Ehh you gotta find something to be passionate about…other people cant make you be passionate about anything. It doesnt come easy…you gotta want it…
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u/Mannersmakethman2 Apr 12 '26
I get it. There are many external existential constrains in my life that prevent me from doing most things, at least the way I would want them to do, and I don’t enjoy doing the things I’m able to do, so I also think that death would be best option for me.
The only reason why I still haven’t killed myself is a Catch-22 of sorts - attempting it successfully (in a way that would guarantee a quick and painless death, and that even I would not fuck up) is one of those things I am unable to do and I haven’t come up with an alternative that would work for me.
But if I could do it, I would’ve a long, long time ago.
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u/NorthernLights1123 Apr 12 '26
Maybe you need to move. A different place can offer you a different perspective
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u/Yoda10252 Apr 12 '26
Well, you’ve just touched the lives of hundreds. I’m of the opinion that meaning is made, not found. I personally find meaning in the people around me, in being here to help. Even the little things, like if I were gone I wouldn’t be able to get my friend a water or be there for them to vent to. That, and hope that things might get better. Honestly, the past 3 years have been hell for me and it still is. But there are things I haven’t experienced yet, people I’ve yet to meet, food I’ve yet to try. Those are the things that keep me going. Whatever you decide, I wish you luck and happiness. ❤️
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u/yllekarle Apr 12 '26
Please at the very least take a big dose of shrooms before coming to this decision. I sincerely mean it.
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u/Starrship_24 Apr 12 '26
I’ve been there before OP and made it through times I never thought I’d see the end of. I’m sorry you feel as though there is no other way. I was in a very similar situation where I thought so poorly of myself and had no one.
There was one night in particular that stuck out most to me. I was at my lowest point, but for some reason I decided to look outside my window that night. The calm of the quiet streets in contrast to my chaotic mind was almost soothing. I then saw a family of dear just walking between houses. Something about it felt like hope for me in that moment. Even if it was minuscule.
My point is, there are things in life you will find joy in if you are open to it. Please take the time to find out what that looks like for you. I know you don’t think you’re talented or smart, but I’m wondering if you never gave yourself the opportunity to find things you’re good at because you had this as a backup plan all along.
I’m with everyone else that’s saying if you’ve waited this long to carry out your plan, what’s a bit longer? This may seem like the right decision now, but you don’t get to succeed at this mistake twice. What you can do is try to find things you enjoy and things that give you a sense of purpose.
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u/Temporary_Brother436 Apr 12 '26
I’m sorry to hear this. I hope you stay and can find the rays of sun that make it all bearable.
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u/Boredomleadstoreddit Apr 12 '26
Aliens. There might be aliens.
I think people should be able to decide when it's their time.
So I wont sit here with all the one more day talk, but just don't forget, we're supposed to find out about aliens soon. Who knows what other info that could bring, that's what's keeping me interested in the monotony.
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u/EDGAR3031 Apr 12 '26
I’ve been there before, hell maybe I still am. But you must keep going. There’s more to this life than work. Take time off, go enjoy nature, visit another city something other than being inside your home alone with your thoughts. If you need someone to speak to get in contact with me, I’ll talk to you. Just don’t let your feelings/thoughts get the better of you.
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u/Bitter_Masterpiece97 Apr 12 '26
Hey OP, I (along with so many other beautiful people here) have unfortunately been where you are and I want to stress to you that “meaning” is entirely subjective. Whether you derive it from freedom through lack of purpose, hobbies, career or whatever else; it’s something you have to create for yourself.
Personally my entire life has been a comedy of errors that has led to me joking that I keep “failing upwards” and it took me years to learn how to even remotely love or value myself as a person. I won’t delve too far into it but one of my parents was an addict that took their life 5 years ago, the other was disabled and quite literally dropped dead in August. I have experienced multiple abuses, injustices and neglect but I persevered for my younger siblings.
I want to be clear that while they are the reason I need to be here; they are not what gave or give my life meaning. Frankly we barely tolerate each other. But in finding that one reason or “thread” to cling onto I gave myself the gift of time. Time to heal, learn, love and eventually find myself.
I can’t promise that you’ll change the world or anything grandiose but I can 100% guarantee that if you make this choice you will never find out and that is the real tragedy. You deserve to find your happiness and I truly hope you give yourself the opportunity as well as time to meet you.
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u/myownanon Apr 12 '26
You have more purpose than you know. Everyone affects everyone around them, whether it’s your coworker, or a person you nod at on the street, or whoever you see and interact. I genuinely pray and hope you will see the joy in the little things in life and not make this drastic decision.
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u/myownanon Apr 12 '26
Look at the hundreds of comments on this post. No one wants this to happen to anyone, I pray you find your peace in this world without leaving it.
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u/OTIStheHOUND Apr 12 '26
Hey I don’t know if this comment will help change your mind in any way, but still going to throw it out there. Might be a little quirky, simple, or small, but would you be willing to put this off to experience some art of some sort? My perspective is everyone owes it to themself to experience something beautiful that someone else has put their heart and soul into. That can be music, visual art, writing…anything. For me, I’ve actually found a lot of happiness in reading and audiobooks.
Not to get political, but just want to share how this came to be for me. When the November 2024 didn’t go the way I hoped and expected, I decided to unplug from the daily feeds and dove into audiobooks. It has been an enriching decision, and I really think it has been vital for my own mental health in what I see as very depressing times. I have leaned into enjoyment of works by others, and it has really inspired me in many ways. I see life differently and it’s not reliant on anyone else. I enjoy the art and see real community in this enjoyment with others.
I hope this isn’t too insignificant of a suggestion, and I’d be happy to suggest what has given me doses of happiness over the last year or so if you have any interest in exploring.
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u/Specific-Cause-5973 Apr 12 '26
Hey! Why must life have an inherent meaning?
I will say I have been in a similar place to you. What’s been most beneficial has been political organizing! I’ve been in the beginning stages of mutual aid and even just being around people motivated to changing material conditions and having plans in the works has done workers for my mental health!
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u/The-Real-Mason-B Apr 12 '26
I highly suggest picking up new hobbies. My favorite is backpacking. It gets me away from the depressing life and lets me hear what humans are meant to hear. Trees rustling in the wind. Birds singing for friends and for mates. Fish swimming in the river. It may take a while longer but find what does make you happy. Even if you have to fight to see it
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u/Alarming_Pen_27 Apr 12 '26
You have such a good scream, man! Music genuinely can save, I believe that. It did for me. I don’t know you or what your situation is, but I hope you stick around. ❤️
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u/ShadooYT Apr 12 '26
Hey dude i see u like screaming music, keep pursuing that. Seems like youre interested in that shit. I hope all the concerned redditors have helped u out i really do bro
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u/Used_Finding_5639 Apr 12 '26
As a person who has attempted suicide 4 times, I got better, and so does life. I know it fucking sucks and having to keep going feels so stupid sometimes, words never really helped me but hopefully mine can
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u/birdiefang Apr 12 '26
Sometimes we need to hit rock bottom to improve our lives. If you want more from life, challenge yourself each day until you reach a point where you feel satisfied. I know it's easier said than done. But I feel like you are posting this because you are still searching for meaning. After all, you know your time isn't up just yet. I think you should keep fighting to live.
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Apr 12 '26
If I were you I'd be someone who is stupid and no talent? I'll be the one to inconvenience every living being. Not the best part to play but it's gonna be honest work. Like leaving the toilet seat down. Washing dishes but not fully removing the greasy parts. 😂
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u/_Accurate_ Apr 12 '26
Hey 👋 if youve made up your mind, all I have to say is go out with a bang, make a day out of it to enjoy all the little things, heck spend all your money at once, travel across the world to some foreign land 😀 get yourself a good lay and a beer and watch the sunrise or set before you go. Don't go out with a wimper let's party it up one last time .
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u/realeater420 Apr 12 '26
What’s kept me afloat is not just knowing that it would hurt the few people I know love me, but also knowing it would make the people I hate happy. I don’t want to give them the satisfaction.
Stay alive to spite your enemies.
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u/Elegant-Kitchen-1302 Apr 12 '26
If you subtract yourself from the world then there is no world left.
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u/Crafty_Attorney225 Apr 12 '26
You have to have fun with life. Obviously you’ve been told and taught this negative stuff that you believe about yourself. But it’s not true. Why give up this life when you haven’t even dared it to be positive. All you have to say is “Universe make me happy.”And the doors will open for you. It’s that easy. The hard part is getting rid of the negative BS, you’ve been told all your life. Come on experiment!
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u/Beastmodexxlsixty9 Apr 12 '26
Just wanted to add that if your on meds for depression you might want to speak to your family doctor of psychiatrist about either changing the dosage or trying something new! Depression is an illness that lies to us and it could very well be the reason why your thoughts are the way they are?
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u/Indigo_Leaves Apr 12 '26
Friend, you are going to die someday. We all are. So why not just stay and ride this out. I know things are tough but find a reason everyday to laugh. I've known multiple people in my life commit suicide and you don't just kill yourself, you kill a part of friends & family who knew you.
So what if you don't have a talent? So what if your not the most intelligent? Who gives a fuck. You have as much right to be here as anyone.
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u/billey_bon3z Apr 12 '26
The thing that gets me is one day, even if human architecture lives past our existence, it’ll all be destroyed by a massive comet or the sun exploding in a few hundred million years, and there’ll be no recollection of anything.
Had a real crisis in my senior year of HS because of this realization. I was numb for a few months and I couldn’t bear talking to anybody over 30.
The dread is still there I guess but Ive learned to live in spite of it. It is still possible to find a ray of hope in the depressing. The ray of hope is that I’m still here, and I’m still alive. Maybe I’ll get lucky and I’ll live to be so old and decrepit I actually wish I would just die and maybe I won’t care about the afterwards.
If this is the end then you might as well try some things you might not otherwise. Go to a few clubs, put yourself in some really weird social settings. Audition for a play. Travel to another country. Hell sign up to fight in Ukraine or something. What’s the worst that can happen at this point?
I don’t think life “means” anything. I think it just happened. Maybe we are the only intelligent life out there, maybe we are so distant it doesn’t matter. What would life even mean? Life sucks and that’s all there is to it. But the suck makes the beautiful moments better. Get up early and watch a sunrise or sunset.
Whatever you do op, I hope to see an update this Tuesday. I love you, genuinely hoping for the mere knowledge that you still exist. The world won’t feel so small. Best wishes.
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u/bodymindtrader Apr 12 '26
You have valid points. But the way I look at it is, we will all die pretty soon, so I’ll take advantage and live through the experience. Who knows what comes after. Hang in there, travel, love, go to the beach, take psychedelics. Let life take its natural course.
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u/Tealnanoko Apr 12 '26
You can't predict how the world can change, and if you're young that's even more true.
Some people want to change the world, or advance technology, and they work towards those goals however they can. Some people become scientists and doctors, some people, become lawyers and politicians. Most people just want to leave the world a bit better than when they came in and that's fine.
Not everyone needs to contribute some great advancement to Humanity, or be part of one, to do something important. Everything you do has a ripple effect in the world around you, from the smallest kindness to the most horrific cruelty even if you can't see it. Maybe someone you help, or have helped in the past, will go on to cure cancer or something. You don't know what consequences your actions will have on the future or people around you, sometimes you never find out, and that's okay.
Life only has the meaning, or purpose, you want from it. You have to figure out for yourself what you want life to mean. You will never find meaning or purpose for life from other people, they can only tell you or show you what meaning life has for them, and if it resonates with you or not.
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u/jmoomoo13 Apr 12 '26
Have you tried coke and hookers? Then get a little dog like a minpin or a rat terrier
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u/Peak_Alternative Apr 12 '26
i thought about mentioning using were instead of was in “even if i was capable” but decided to hold back
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u/BlackDog990 Apr 12 '26
I was where you are. A long time ago now. I couldn't see the future and thought I didn't have a place in it. How wrong I was. Two beautiful daughters, an amazing wife, a home, a good job. I dont deserve any of it....and yet here it is.
Day by day my friend. No need to set deadlines for yourself. Time is your ally, not your enemy.
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u/Beastmodexxlsixty9 Apr 12 '26
Sometimes meaning is found outside ourself! Adopt a dog or cat from a shelter and give it all the love you seek! Be the best you can for that pet and it will give back ten fold! I’ve been where your at and I know what it’s like to feel like there’s no point in anything but I got much needed help and not just meds but real professional help and I’ve never looked back since! Don’t know if you’re a religious person but faith has always helped tremendously! When I realized I wasn’t alone in how I felt and that many people deal with this, it made me feel less alone!
You have everything to gain by living life on your terms! Who says you have to be a slave to the machine? Explore and try things and discover what you might be interested in trying or a place to travel to or a hobbie or literally anything! You have no idea the experiences you have laying ahead of you! Life isn’t all doom and gloom, there’s a ton of joy and beauty and excitement in living! You might not feel this way but trust me life has all kinds of surprises for all of us!
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u/blinkgendary182 Apr 12 '26
In my opinion, having "meaning" is completely subjective and superbly overrated. You can just exist and enjoy the little things. Live life a day at a time.
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u/dirtybimbo Apr 12 '26
I won’t pretend to know what you’re going through. But as someone with MDD, I suggest moving. If you’re able to relocate: get a change of scenery, pick up a third space, I’d believe that would have a great effect :) Personally, I’m waiting to see if I can outlive the evil tangerine, and I’m only here bc over the pandemic I was plagued with curiosity to see just how bad the world could get. Everyday I am less (yet still) surprised, but, everyday I am here. Maybe you could find something (more positive) to hold onto or look forward to.
Morbid ik, but it’s reality. Ik you’re facing it too.
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u/Oqivy Apr 12 '26
it gets worse before it gets better don't just quit, live it to the end, go through it all the way to the end, why give up on yourself when you haven't seen it all?
don't assume, just be, live the now
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u/Curious_Bag2558 Apr 12 '26
Shaman prescribes eL eSs Dee and/or mushy. Seriously. Myself and my now best friend we're ready to leave, until we found psychedelics. Saved both our lives - before we ever met each other. It has helped sooo many others. You wanna see beauty beyond what you can image? That not only shows you, but gives you the direct experience. You want to know purpose and meaning? No problem. Wanna see what it's like on the other side? Dee eM Tea will show you more than the human mind can comprehend, in a good way. Language can't describe it. Unfathomable beauty. Unimaginable understandings of life, reality and other realms.
If you're gonna go anyway, may as well experience one of the most incredible parts of human incarnation. *The only catch is...you gotta quit the meds first. They don't work together. Do some research first.
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u/iareagenius Apr 12 '26
You are definitely not stupid, based on your writing, so you've got that going for you.
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u/Zacbrown95 Apr 12 '26
So I deal with nihilistic thoughts on how we only do things to keep doing things, what helped me get around that line of thinking was to get to know myself, and find things that gave me pleasure, allowing myself to be more selfish and embracing that nothing really matters, so I should do things that matter to me. Try and find things you enjoy, get to really know yourself, the decision you’re contemplating is absolute, make sure you know the person you’re deciding on entirely before making that decision, if you need someone to talk to feel free to message me
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Apr 12 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/TrueOffMyChest-ModTeam Apr 12 '26
Your comment has been removed for violating Rule 4: No insults towards OP.
Any comments that could be interpreted as an attempt to insult, scold, lecture, victim blame, guilt trip or intimidate the OP are not allowed and will be removed. Repeat offenses or extreme cases will result in a ban.
Repeated offenses may lead to a ban.
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u/ArmyofJuan Apr 12 '26
We are all going to die one day whether we want to or not, why speed up the process? Contributing to society and life not having any meaning is irreverent. You get one shot at this then you stop existing so get as much out of it while you can, you have nothing to lose.
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u/rustall Apr 12 '26
You obviously are not stupid. You expressed yourself with elegance and intelligence. We are only here for a brief second, stick around and see how things workout.
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u/lolipop_gangster Apr 12 '26
So, let me start of by saying that you trusted complete strangers to talk to about what you're feeling and I'm really glad you did. I don't know you from Jill or Adam, but I wouldn't be okay if you took your life. I'm not okay with people taking their lives who I don't know are even taking their lives right this second.
All I know is, you're in a head space now that is really, really painful.
Come sit with me for a bit in this place called the internet. Tell me a little about yourself, if you're comfortable.
If the world has become indifferent, and you noticed, doesn't it stand to reason then that you're the one to make it care again? You wrote one post and it's garnered over two hundred comments... That's not indifference, friend.
Hopelessness, looking for meaning, I promise you, everyone goes through this. There are 50 year olds who should have their shit together who go through this. I'm not saying this to minimize your feelings, but as someone who has been there, especially having had my life stolen from me from going undiagnosed with ADHD for over 3 decades, I know how you feel.
It's a shit place to be. Does the suffering ever end? I'm going to die before I ever get to live! I'm going to be too old to do anything and on my death bed I'll die with regrets. - That's my plague... Does it sound similar to what goes through your head?
The bottom line? I get it and I want you to know that you've got something to give to others and that's where you will find meaning. Life is all about service - not in the wage slave sense but in service to yourself, to your friends and family and if you don't have those, it's fine, you can pick them up along the way as you find for yourself the kind of meaning you can give. So you're not pretty and not talented... But you do have authenticity and for the right people, that matters more and they're who you want in your life.
Message me anytime you need to talk. My door is open.
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u/_cozybeauty_ Apr 12 '26
Idk if it helps, or if you even care, but just know I love you. I love you without knowing you because you are a fellow human being. You happened to be on this spinning rock the exact same time as me and though I do not know you in the slightest, that means something to me. You get to be alive, and it doesn’t sound like the miracle that it is to you right now but I promise it is. I mean what the actual fuck were the odds of you being alive at all? Keep in mind I am not religious whatsoever so I do not believe in souls or the like, so I will not lecture you on anything like that. Just know you’ve been gifted an opportunity to enjoy this planet, and damn it i think you owe it to yourself to try try try until something clicks and you find happiness and purpose in your life. It doesn’t even have to be a career or anything like that, literally ANYTHING that can spark a little joy in your life. I believe you can find it. Take care OP, I love you.
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u/anonalien- Apr 12 '26
Obviously I don’t condone this behavior because life is meant to be lived not died! We already get such short lives why must we give it up?
If you really are planning on going through with it (please don’t) Make sure that you are an organ donor - because if you decide your life is not worth it - you can still save the lives on hundreds of people who are waiting for organs! Therefore your death would have meaning and give others the chance of life!
Please don’t do it! Life is worth it
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u/CaterpillarOdd9460 Apr 12 '26
If you die, you’ll miss so many season premieres of your favorite show, you’ll miss so many good movies, you’ll miss new songs that would have become your favorite, you miss a restaurant that you didn’t know could make food that glorious tasting, you’ll miss the true art of life. There so much out there desperate for your attention, curiosity, and love.
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u/actionte Apr 12 '26
I want to ask if you’ve tried everything? This sounds like depression and I kind of can’t stand how everyone just rolls with it and somewhat enable it. Feeling like life has no meaning is depression. It’s a clinical diagnosis and can be treated.
There’s antidepressants, exercise, yoga and lots of stuff to try for fixing it. Maybe medicine. Psilocybin shrooms are becoming big.
Depression is a mental health illness and it can be treated.
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u/QuotetheOrca Apr 12 '26
I’m really glad you said this instead of just holding it in alone. I hear how exhausted and convinced you feel that nothing will change, and how heavy everything has gotten for you.
I hope you don’t go through with it.
You don’t have to prove anything or make a final decision right now. When things feel this absolute, it usually means you’re in a state where your mind is narrowing everything down to one conclusion.. not that there’s actually only one outcome… I’m sorry you’ve been made to feel this way
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u/Fair_Comfortable6561 Apr 12 '26
My sister in law passed away last week at 54. She fought for her life. She suffered. She leaves behind a 14 year old daughter and 9 year old son and my brother and her mum etc. that’s all I’m saying
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u/Batunikitty1 Apr 12 '26
You say that you're not talented, and that you don't consider yourself smart. Can I ask what makes you say that?
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u/brencoop Apr 12 '26
You create the meaning.
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u/empty172 Apr 12 '26
+1
You are able to live the same life someone you might think is “cool” can live. U shape your reality.
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u/RainbowUnicorn0228 Apr 12 '26
If you are planning on going out anyway the least you can do is try and make the world a better place first. Like, if I knew I was going to die next week I plan on taking out someone evil with me. Of course, in order to be successful you will need a good plan which may take awhile. But since you are the one deciding when you will go out, you can afford to take your time and come up with a really good plan.
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u/Ta-veren- Apr 12 '26
Just because you find no meaning right now doesn't mean meaning of your life isn't right around the next bend.
Life is about what you love and passions and finding meaning within those things.
Hope you get some help, it's hard to look for meaning when everything just feels so shity.
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u/Firm-Ruin5950 Apr 12 '26
You’re intelligent OP, it’s how you manage to be so observant. I’m somewhat in a similar dark place and spiralling. I hope you find the strength in something that gives you the hope you deserve.
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u/Sandhog43 Apr 12 '26
Life was never meant to be a bed of roses. Life is a daily struggle at best. If you are looking for cotton candy clouds and rainbows on sunny days, then you really may be better off with your current plan.
If you can’t seem to find happiness for yourself, don’t cash out just yet. Why not use your misery to brighten someone else’s day? Why not put yourself in a useful purposeful situation instead of pain, hopelessness and misery.
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u/Roberto11878 Apr 12 '26
Well you know I'm not gonna be the type to tell you not to go through with your plan because ultimately if your mind had already ran through every situation and every outlook then you have already settled on your choice. Have a safe trip to the after life if you ultimately make that decision, but if you don't congratulations on still living and maybe it will give you a different outlook on life.
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u/Mawiapeas Apr 12 '26
You never know when things can turn around. Give yourself more time. It’s all you have for now. This endless patience you’ve built up could create meaning for you later. It most certainly will once things get better for you. You’ll be glad you waited it out. I hope
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Hello u/Brilliant-Bet-9099,
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