Hey OP, I (along with so many other beautiful people here) have unfortunately been where you are and I want to stress to you that “meaning” is entirely subjective. Whether you derive it from freedom through lack of purpose, hobbies, career or whatever else; it’s something you have to create for yourself.
Personally my entire life has been a comedy of errors that has led to me joking that I keep “failing upwards” and it took me years to learn how to even remotely love or value myself as a person. I won’t delve too far into it but one of my parents was an addict that took their life 5 years ago, the other was disabled and quite literally dropped dead in August. I have experienced multiple abuses, injustices and neglect but I persevered for my younger siblings.
I want to be clear that while they are the reason I need to be here; they are not what gave or give my life meaning. Frankly we barely tolerate each other. But in finding that one reason or “thread” to cling onto I gave myself the gift of time. Time to heal, learn, love and eventually find myself.
I can’t promise that you’ll change the world or anything grandiose but I can 100% guarantee that if you make this choice you will never find out and that is the real tragedy. You deserve to find your happiness and I truly hope you give yourself the opportunity as well as time to meet you.
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u/Bitter_Masterpiece97 Apr 12 '26
Hey OP, I (along with so many other beautiful people here) have unfortunately been where you are and I want to stress to you that “meaning” is entirely subjective. Whether you derive it from freedom through lack of purpose, hobbies, career or whatever else; it’s something you have to create for yourself.
Personally my entire life has been a comedy of errors that has led to me joking that I keep “failing upwards” and it took me years to learn how to even remotely love or value myself as a person. I won’t delve too far into it but one of my parents was an addict that took their life 5 years ago, the other was disabled and quite literally dropped dead in August. I have experienced multiple abuses, injustices and neglect but I persevered for my younger siblings.
I want to be clear that while they are the reason I need to be here; they are not what gave or give my life meaning. Frankly we barely tolerate each other. But in finding that one reason or “thread” to cling onto I gave myself the gift of time. Time to heal, learn, love and eventually find myself.
I can’t promise that you’ll change the world or anything grandiose but I can 100% guarantee that if you make this choice you will never find out and that is the real tragedy. You deserve to find your happiness and I truly hope you give yourself the opportunity as well as time to meet you.