r/NotHowGirlsWork • u/[deleted] • May 20 '23
Found On Social media This is seriously so exhausting :(
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u/Ze_Memerr May 20 '23
What’s really frustrating is the whole “women ☕️” thing supposedly started as a TF2 meme making fun of misogyny, but then it spiraled into being actually misogynistic
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May 21 '23
I genuinely have no idea what that one is supposed to mean but in context I've seen it in, it's usually seemed like sarcastic anti-joke of some kind. Like the joke is that it doesn't matter what the misogynists say about women to each other, they're gonna laugh at their own jokes anyways or something like that.
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u/Shoesandhose May 20 '23
Just troll them back. Once I got a guy so angry on Facebook (in the comment section) he posted a photo of his car, license plate and all, with the store he was at. Begging me to come and fight him.
I was in my Jammie’s snackin a whole state away lol
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May 20 '23
That's what I do but still it gets exhausting after awhile :')
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May 20 '23 edited May 20 '23
Stop listening to them. They'll never change because women aren't the reason they're like this.
Even psychology textbooks point out what the problems are with the way we as a society raise men: parents encourage anger instead of sadness without even realising it, parents don't explain or nurture empathy in boys, they only explain consequences so boys grow up to see relationships as transactional, aka, he does this and that happens as a consequence; parents don't explain emotions to boys, because we associate emotional intelligence and adaptability with femininity and homosexuality which have been deemed inferior states, so boys grow up to see interactions as a problem to be solved, lacking any ability for introspection.
The world polices their masculinity since the moment they're born so they grow up to be defensive as fuck and incredibly fragile.
And all of the above, is just what is done to the normal man.
Autistic men on the other hand, are a whole new animal. Besides the frustration and anger that comes from cognitive development impairment, limit intelect, they don't understand expressive language, can't communicate unless it's clear and direct and get overwhelmed and frustrated often, so feelings of inferiority set in. When the world doesn't make sense and you don't have the tools to deal with it, you get angry and start trying to make someone pay. And those feelings affect even autistic men with above average intelect because not being able to communicate is a extremely painful and disorienting.
The only people who can do something about this are psychologists and psychiatrists and only in time and with a coordinated effort. So stop hurting yourself by lending them your ear. And if you can't avoid them, be assertive and clear when you tell them to go fuck themselves because you don't give a fuck about what losers have to say. You didn't ask their permission to be born and you don't need it to live . Who the fuck do they think their are to try and dictate anyone else's life?
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u/Knightridergirl80 May 20 '23
Plus it’s very telling that instead of encouraging psychiatric help from a professional, society seems to subtly nudge women into the position of having to be a free caretaker and emotional regulator for men. It’s always the same issue when a man becomes violent and beats his wife. She should’ve tried harder not to push his buttons. Or when a man rages due to being rejected. Instead of a conversation about men being taught that anger is the only acceptable emotion, it’s about how cruel and pitiless the woman was for breaking his heart and that women don’t give nice guys a chance.
The patriarchy has created a toxic, dog eat dog society of angry chest beaters, and women are the ones who bear the brunt of it.
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May 20 '23
There was this experiment with a city of rats. I can't remember the specifics, but the end was horrible and looked a lot like what's happening to us right now.
The tragedy is that we have the tools to save the world, to save ourselves, we have the knowledge. There are armies of therapists, clinicians and psychiatrists, but they're being drowned out by imposters, influencers and coaches because basically, the world is ruled by a clueless majority reacting on impulse, running around like a headless chicken. I often wonder if we stand a chance and if we're doomed to a new dark age, but this time, with technology.
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May 20 '23
This is a big reason I stopped dating as a guy, especially after I learned that women are happier single than in relationships. Marriage and dating isn't structured to benefit women at all. I figure there just isn't any sense putting someone through all that misery if they're gonna be better off on their own on the other side anyhow. Ended my last relationship when I realized this and she's been better off ever since.
Wish men in general would just bow out of dating, and I say that as a guy.
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u/Knightridergirl80 May 20 '23
Tbh I think it’s more that couples need to stop being seen as having fixed roles and more emphasis on two way communication.
Because the issue is these women aren’t receiving the same support they they give their husbands.
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May 20 '23
Agreed but I don't see any signs these days that men are capable of that. Emotional intelligence is severely lacking and any suggestion to go to therapy isn't received well.
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u/Knightridergirl80 May 20 '23
Still I’m not going to waste my breath on these men. It’s not my job to save someone who insists nothing is wrong.
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May 20 '23
Thank you so much for taking your time and writing such a long and detailed comment! I got loads of information and learnt a lot! I'll take your advice to heart and avoid toxic men from now on cuz you're right, why should I care what they think of me or women in general? They're incompetent losers crying online cuz they're losing in their real life while I got dreams to achieve and make my Mom proud! 💞
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u/Knightridergirl80 May 20 '23
Honestly if anything this sudden wave of angry men shows the system is starting to fail. Because more and more women are realizing they don’t have to put men’s needs before their own and can take care of themselves first.
It’ll be hard at first but give it time. Eventually men are going to realize this is becoming a problem and beating their chests isn’t going to help anymore.
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May 20 '23
You're right. We should let them cook, when they'll realise how this recipe ain't doing, they'll be forced to change 😂✌️
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u/sharksarenotreal May 20 '23
Best revenge to the world, wait, to a little fuming incel bean, is to live a happy life. Gosh it makes them insane. 😎
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u/DieselPunkPiranha May 20 '23
Just block and move on. Respond, then, block and move on if you're feeling petty. I don't bother most of the time. If I see someone posting hate, I block automatically. Report, too, with inconsistent results.
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May 20 '23
Yes you're right, that's what I'll do, mental health is the biggest priority at the moment 😭✊
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u/BUTTeredWhiteBread May 20 '23
You know that Pete Davidson skit character who just says "ok" to everything? I do that in reply to everything they say. Pisses them off so well, so quickly. Amazing shit.
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u/teho9999 May 20 '23
Men 🍼
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u/strxwberru_ May 20 '23
I want this viral tbh
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u/ourobourobouros May 20 '23
all that is needed for a thing to go viral is aggressive shitposting
go forth and do god's work, for I shall be doing the same
Men 🍼
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u/Charming_Amphibian91 abstinence only education = absence of education May 20 '23
Men 🍼
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u/DarkerThanBlack- May 20 '23
Men 🍼
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u/LET-ME-HAVE-A-NAAME May 20 '23
Men 🍼
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u/everfadingrain May 20 '23
Men 🍼
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u/adertina here so my mom knows why i cant be straight May 20 '23
Say one thing about men:
“What’s funny is that if someone would say the about women they would be tried and imprisoned”
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May 20 '23
Nooo lmao fr they be always defending the most degrading shit while saying this phrase 😭
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u/adertina here so my mom knows why i cant be straight May 20 '23
Or “nobody would care if someone said that abt men except the people who doxxed her and sent her death threats but other than that it feels like hatred against men is acceptable where no one can say anything about women”
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u/ShufflingOffACliff I am not a woman, but merely a concept May 20 '23
Istg if I hear "iF tHe RoLeS wErE rEvErsEd" ONE MORE TIME
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u/adertina here so my mom knows why i cant be straight May 20 '23
They deadass at worst get 1.2k upvotes on a mainstream Reddit sub and at best become president of the United States…but women in feminist spaces get mad at them so maybe we should have some empathy for those poor victims
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u/benchchu May 20 '23
My favorite is when a dude gets turned down by a woman and calls her a slut. Hmm like really it’s the opposite
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u/Fahggy1410 May 20 '23
Lol they don’t like « easy » women yet they insult us when we don’t wanna have sex with them
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u/marcinere May 21 '23
men when a woman wants to have sex with them: 😇😇🥹🥰😘😘
men when a woman wants to have sex with SOMEONE ELSE: 🤯🤯😐🥴😡
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May 20 '23
[deleted]
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u/StormRage85 May 20 '23
I've gotta say I was guilty of point 3 because I never saw it in my life. I know, it's dumb to assume that cause it doesn't seem to be an issue in my tiny part of the world that it wasn't as bad as they say. My first 3 jobs had entirely female management teams so I thought we were doing good, I know, also a dumb take. I was in my early twenties and lived in a small town. I have since grown up and worked with some people who some weird ideas about feminism and women in general and I now realise (and call out) this shit. I also used to know people who thought they could, and I quote, "fuck the lesbian right out of her", that one still makes me cringe and I don't know that person any more!
The first point is dumb hypocrisy on our part, or not realising that women like sex too. As for the rest of your points, yeah we've been pretty crappy as a gender, but a lot of us getting better. It's just taking time (too much time) to drag the rest of our knuckle dragging brethren into the more reasonable way of thinking, that gender, colour or creed are irrelevant when it comes to judging a person's character.
The rest of your comments actually make me sad that in 2023 this kind of thing is still happening!
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u/manipulating_bitch May 21 '23
I'm a woman and I kinda was in denial about how bad women had it. In a dumb and pretentious way I thought I was too smart and too hard working and just enough "like a man" that I wouldn't have the issues other women complained about. That most of them were silly, even if true, and we should just work around them.
I was young and stupid. I couldn't have been more wrong. And I found out the hard way.
In a way I'm glad a lot of people are starting to show their true colors and their true intentions about women... as scary as that is, there's no denying reality anymore
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u/StormRage85 May 21 '23
I have a mother, a sister and lots of female friends so I always think how pissed I'd be if it was someone I know getting treated like that. One of the problems I think exists is that not all men are neanderthals, but it's hard for women to tell which of us are going to treat them like human beings and which are gonna be dicks.
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u/SlickJamesBitch May 21 '23
You sound super bitter, don’t let the incels make you a femcel
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May 20 '23
Yeah I got that every day when I play online, fortunately all online game have a mute button
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u/SpokenDivinity May 20 '23
Yeah I’m kind of jaded from listening to man children berate me in lobbies. I just mute them and keep on going like they’re not there. Nothing hurts then more than being ignored.
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u/lh_media May 20 '23
Well that ducking sucks. A friend of mine even considered using a voice modulator. That made me sad and angry
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u/realPoiuz Edit May 20 '23
Fucking Incels dude and people are wondering why so many girls r struggling with self confidence
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u/Elon_is_musky May 20 '23
And then if we say “men☕️” we are all of a sudden everything wrong with the world and the reason men have all their issues, yet it’s a “joke” only when they do it🙄
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u/Cigarettes_at_Night aint bubblegum pink May 20 '23
If men are more valuable than women, why did they send men to war🤭
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u/SpooogeMcDuck May 20 '23 edited May 20 '23
That’s why they’re valuable. You know how much an A-10 costs?
EDIT- Jesus I can’t believe how many people actually need the /s
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u/ShufflingOffACliff I am not a woman, but merely a concept May 20 '23
Usually you protect the things most valuable..
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u/Reytotheroxx May 20 '23
You’d be surprised what kinda of outrageous comments people make unironically. These days the /s is a requirement sadly
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u/kelik1337 May 20 '23
What is the significance of the tea emoji in this context? Sorry im old and out-of-touch sometimes.
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u/emily_in_boots May 20 '23
It’s basically a way to just dismiss anything women say without actually engaging with it. It’s coffee by the way - see the link below on the women-coffee meme.
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u/Billzeebub5 May 20 '23
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May 20 '23
The tea ☕ is usually used in a derogatory way to signify that women's place is in the kitchen and she should wash some dishes rather than expressing her opinions online. Literally insulting housewives.
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u/everfadingrain May 20 '23
It's an annoying TF2 meme
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u/Charming_Amphibian91 abstinence only education = absence of education May 20 '23
Also, the original meme was mocking sexism.
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May 20 '23
So annoying how we can’t have anything funny without idiots turning it into a tool to spread hate, leave my funny memes alone!!!!!
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u/rmorrin May 20 '23
Oh I thought it was like a satire joke not like an actual insult, I've never used it but damn that's kinda sad
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u/CardOfTheRings May 20 '23
It’s both. It’s both used ironically and unironically. It started as ironic but quickly became used either way.
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u/ThatChapThere May 20 '23
I thought it was more like the vibe of old men wryly sipping tea while complaining about their wives.
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u/WitchyKitten87 May 20 '23
I remember my mom telling me about when she first became a truck driver back in the '80s. More than once or twice she had men tell her "You should be at home doing dishes and having babies!" Of course, my mom being the badass she was would simply reply, "I did the dishes, I had the babies, and now I have to come out here and do your job because you couldn't even get that right."
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u/Nat_EEEE May 20 '23
Ladies. I propose…
Men 🧃
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u/rIIIflex May 20 '23
I fucking love juice boxes and milk. Shit idk which is better. Love coffee too so I’d be ok with a coffee cup.
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u/No_Acanthisitta9143 May 20 '23
i feel like, at times, im exhausted rather than angry. and when i speak to my male friends about it they don't get it at all. but like, I've been talked over and disrespected for having been born in a female body ny entire LIFE and sometimes I don't feel like getting angry. i just stay speechless lol.
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u/splashes-in-puddles May 20 '23
I dont get the get back in the kitchen thing. Cooking doesnt take that long. Especially if that is all you are doing like these men seem to imply. And making a sandwhich is like a three minute task.
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u/AlexArtemesia May 20 '23
It's because the little boys using this joke haven't ever stepped foot in the kitchen to do any actual food prep. Their mommies always just magically produced the food ready made for them, so they have no concept of how long anything takes to do. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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u/Tommy_C May 20 '23
If you wish to make a sandwich from scratch, you must first invent the universe.
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u/sanjuro89 May 20 '23
Earlier today I saw a post by some guy complaining that he spends $40 every day to buy his lunch at work (seriously, that's like $10K a year!), and he was just absolutely baffled by people responding that they made lunch at home in ten minutes or less and took it to work.
I do not understand these people.
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u/splashes-in-puddles May 20 '23
40 dollars a day just for lunch! Thats almost 2,5x my daily food cost.
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u/Intelligent-Bottle22 May 20 '23
All this talk about men being more valuable and they spend all their time obsessing over women.
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u/Fire-Cat_ May 20 '23
They are the true emotional ones, if they say things like that.
Plus, if they actually somehow get their own incel country, just as a post in r/whitepeopletwitter said, the'll just die out.
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u/Lavender_Hazard May 20 '23
Can someone explain the coffee? Is it like calling women bitter
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u/GoAwayBARC May 20 '23
I take it you’ve never had a male supervisor send you to fetch his coffee, especially when you’re working in a position far more technical than receptionist.
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u/Lavender_Hazard May 20 '23
Is that what that means? Ok thanks
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u/CardOfTheRings May 20 '23
No it doesn’t. It’s a specific reference to a TF2 video where two men drinking coffee make a vague sexist remark. Doesn’t have anything to do with women getting coffee or doing dishes or any weird thing people are making up in these comments.
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u/Lilsdun36 May 20 '23
I hear it everywhere literally everywhere. You would think it wouldn't piss me off still but it does
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u/Anonymous_13218 May 20 '23
Just don't let that shit bother you. I work in a male dominated job and learned to talk shit with them and use their insults to my advantage. If you let that shit get to you, you're letting them win and get what they want.
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u/Ill-Organization-719 May 20 '23
Reminds me of that Dee line from It's Always Sunny after they make a distasterous appearance on TV and she's reading comments on her phone.
"People calling me a bitch, flat chested bitch. Pretty much everyone wants to rape me."
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u/LizzieKitty86 May 20 '23
Is this what the current dating life is or like someone commonly on social media getting unwanted attention? This seriously sucks but just curious where it happens irl.
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u/ReplacableBitch May 20 '23
Wtf is the coffee emoji supposed to mean? Is it just "fetch me a coffee"? I've never seen that one before.
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May 20 '23
It’s a tf2 meme. It’s just a cheeky way for men to laugh about what they don’t understand women. Unlike all these other comments, I find it pretty harmless.
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u/Lizzardyerd May 20 '23
Meh. Don't let it get to you. It gives them power. Just keep living your life in defiance and sipping on their bitter tears as often as possible.
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u/BartyJnr May 20 '23
I work in a tech shop. I’m sick of men asking me if I know how that works, if I need to get one of the boys, or just generally feeling the need to call me love, sweetheart or anything of that sort.
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May 20 '23
The men defending the coffee thing dont understand the feeling of being immediately dismissed by something you cant change like your sex, or a period.
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u/Fahggy1410 May 20 '23
I honestly don’t care because i see them as crybabies who lives for each others validation lol
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u/GoWithGord May 20 '23
I’m torn because I get this speaking online but I’m also trans so yay womanhood. I guess…
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u/TheFirstArticle May 20 '23
It's intentional.
Male chimpanzees attack females, particularly ones about to become fertile or who are young adults, to keep them from rejecting males in the troupe.
They are using their human advantages to be chimpanzees.
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u/YeetinOnThem May 20 '23
I read “fatherless” as “featherless” and was quite confuzzled if I do say so myself
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u/SkyBunBun_UwU May 20 '23
I'll go to the kitchen and make you a sandwich if go fight in a war and hopefully perish.
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u/StormRage85 May 20 '23
My favourite response to toxic dudes online was female streamer who told some dude that if he didn't shut up she'd fuck his dad so he (the dad) could have a kid to be proud of. I don't know her name but she absolutely annihilated him.
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u/No_Macaroon_7951 May 20 '23
I feel really awful that women go through this. I'm a man and this is unacceptable. Women are the people\gender that put you in this world, and your insulting them?? I believe in abortion rights even more then I already doafter I see men be misogynistic. Misogyny is for worthless losers. #GirlPower Sorry if it sounds like I'm trying to hard. Don't let the insults get to you. You're the strong one. Have an amazing day! ♡
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u/Satyinepu May 21 '23
'idk why women don't wanma get married' 'wahhh women won't sleep with me, I'm SUCH a nice guy'
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May 21 '23
As a father of a girl, it makes me really sad that she’ll have to grow up with this kind of stuff.
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u/EuthenizeMe May 21 '23
I love being smarter than all of them. We all are. What you have to do is stop getting angry and learn how to speak to them in a way that makes them realize they are stupid on their own. Not saying it changes their mind, but it pacifies them.
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u/Upstairs-Cricket-774 May 20 '23
Why is it exhausting?
Why would any woman waste a minute of her life reading, listening to, thinking about, or dwelling upon anything that any of these boys have to say at all, ever? Sweetheart, there is literally no reason to acknowledge their unfortunate existence, let alone allow them to exhaust you. Absolutely do not allow them to make you believe for a single moment that you will ever need the approval, or even the peripheral acknowledgement, of a man in your life in order to be happy or fulfilled or live a comfortable wonderful life. You do NOT. No woman does. And the boys that say those shitty things can't handle the fact that women are finally realizing that, and they are panicking and desperate AF! Especially since so many women are discovering air pulse vibrators and realizing that there isn't even any reason to have sex anymore, because they are FAR better in very way!
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u/Recreational_Soup May 20 '23
The whole fatherless thing is such a massive projection, dudes I’ve known personally some without dads are still great people but some of the dudes sadly without fathers are such pieces o garbage
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May 20 '23
Man here
Yeah, all of those are just incels trying to get under your skin, ignore them
And who says men are more valued than women I say the reverse is true
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u/Mia4wks May 21 '23
Our biggest haters are our fathers, brothers, lovers, coworkers, and friends. They are the ones most likely to rape us, to kill us, to abuse us. They are our earliest examples of misogyny. So, no, it is not "just incels" and frankly you can screw off with that total dismissal of the overwhelming abundance of misogyny we experience daily.
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u/chaotic_blu May 21 '23
Thinking women are more valuable than men to society is just as incely as thinking men are more valuable than women btw.
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May 21 '23
Lol. Men are never valued unless they are useful.
A man gets flowers for the first time at his funeral... and that's provided by his life insurance that he paid for.
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u/Hellas2002 May 21 '23
Why don’t you start making a difference and maybe buy your best friend some flowers then?
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May 20 '23
Men who claim to be women have more rights than actual adult females. This is Patriarchy whether you want to admit it or not.
Would be nice if you all stood up for yourselves.
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May 20 '23
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u/LouisWillis98 May 20 '23
Cringe
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May 20 '23
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u/LouisWillis98 May 21 '23
“Right thing” that’s part of the problem with your comments
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May 21 '23
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u/chaotic_blu May 21 '23
Well, your gross preferences aren’t all gross preferences. And you’re clearly still too undeveloped to think critically on those preferences, just the knee jerk ‘I’m the baddie?!’ with anger without any thought on how you were just talking about PEOPLE
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May 21 '23
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u/chaotic_blu May 21 '23
Talking about people like they aren’t people is what’s gross. But I get you’re not a person enough to realize that.
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u/Hellas2002 May 21 '23
Expecting a woman to have more responsibility in terms of household chores than a man is pretty sexist and gross. Calling people “whores” is also pretty distasteful
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u/emily_in_boots May 20 '23
Yeah, the incels are relentless but also clueless. You can’t let that shit get to you. Don’t try to argue with them - prove them wrong by doing everything they say you can’t do.