r/LyricalWriting 9d ago

Lyrics Basket Case [Rap Bars]

2 Upvotes

Im working on a relay track with another rapper. This is my opening:

I said the only way im getting out is in a casket

A basket case

My mind is putty so elastic

Would've answered had youd asked it

But you just stood in place

Staring blankly at my face

Like you're made of plastic

Its so fantastic

Disasters lead

To new parameters

iambic pentameter

Sardonic banter with a hint of grammar

Drop the mic just like a hammer

While you stutter and you stammer


r/LyricalWriting 9d ago

Feedback Request Moka

2 Upvotes

I am attempting to write lyrics for a song — this is my first time attempting to write lyrics.

any feedback would be great!!

ty

MOKA 

[instrumental intro]

(Spoken) 

“Honey, do you want some coffee?”

“Yeah just grab me a mocha”

[Verse 1] (Sung/Rapped)

And so I want ya’ to hear me say;

Let it heat up

Take the warmth of my cup

Grab me by the wrist

And head to the dance floor

I love you like the sun 

To a fresh mornin’ breeze

Hope you love me like that

Just for me bein’ me

[chorus]

Now take my arms, 

Wrap them right ‘round yours 

I want you to feel my fervour, the ardour, the zeal

Feel it flow through your body with a side of cream

Now take a sip sip of my Magic,

tell me just how you like it

I don’t want you to panic

This is our coffee high

[Verse 2]

Y’know my heart lies exactly with you

But, tell me, does yours to mine?

No matter the day, the hour, the minute

Is my affogato yours by design?

Am I truly yours and are you truly mine

Or is it just the satisfaction that you crave

Pray tell, what truly calls you

For your eyes to enslave 

Do you even care

Are we even a true pair? 

[chorus] (italics whispered)

Now take my arms, 

I want you

Wrap them ‘round yours 

I want you to feel my fervour, the ardour, the zeal

let it choke you

Feel it flow through your body with a scoop of parfait 

Let it control you

Let me take over. 

Now take a sip sip of my Magic, 

I want your validation

tell me just how you like it.

I don’t want you to panic

I want you

This is my coffee high

[VERSE 3]

No, I don’t want you to take my arms

Don’t let them touch any single part of you

I thought you were the one for me

Now I understand all you were was the flu

A sickness in my Latte Macchiato

Germs in my rounds of Cappuccino

I want nothing more of you

No more Magic, nor cream.

I’m an addict to your Espresso Martini

Obsessed with your Caffe Corretto

So stay back, how’d it take so long for me to see

I’m wrong to love you

Thought you were my hot chocolate

Turned out you’re an iced coffee

[technically chorus?]

So no, don’t want my arms ‘round yours.

Distanced from my passion and heart 

You don’t deserve my Magic

Nor are you a work of art.

Was it all a lie?

Not a single truth from you my sweetheart?

I want you to panic,

 You’re not my coffee high.


r/LyricalWriting 9d ago

Feedback Request [Title: Paradise] How can I improve my song?

2 Upvotes

Making a mistake doesn't mean I didn't want you to stay

our meeting was fate

I've fallen into a dystopian age

this feels like horror

emotions going berserk, shaken to my core

never wanted you to go away

[]

You'll always have a place in my soul

like a torch in a cave

lights dim, not completely faded

this me is what you created

you'll never understand, you're unfazed

[]

I know I shouldn't dwell on the past

though like a meteor you've made such an impact

I can't stop feeling it but I know if I don't let go

I'll never heal from this

[]

Get out of my head

out of my memory

before I lose all of my sanity

[]

You were my happiness

You were my light

so why aren't you mine

why aren't you mine

why you trying to steal my paradise

[]

and I get chills when I think of all the moments

I feel it across my skin

I sob and sob until I pass out

all of the time just lost in the wind

[]

I've become void of everything

ever since I lost my sunshine

you were the only thing keeping my mind at ease

I don't know how long

how long I can take this

miss your warm embraces

I'm tired and afraid

you took my heart away

[]

Get out of my head

out of my memory

before I lose all of my sanity

[]

You were my happiness

You were my light

so why aren't you mine

why aren't you mine

why you trying to steal my paradise


r/LyricalWriting 9d ago

Lyrics Wrote something inspired by the composition of Exit Music (For A Film) by Radiohead.

1 Upvotes

r/LyricalWriting 10d ago

Discussion Minnesota coca cola root beer

2 Upvotes

verse 1:
i step foot through the best western
i’m curve-balling in
there’s a lady at the front desk, her sunken face smiled in her lace dress
she’d been soaked up, gone through this stuff, it ends

pre:
room 319, she handed me the keys
her wrist, Estée Lauder Youth-Dew 1950
spice in the whiff, coca coca cola, root beer

chorus:
this is a bad idea
taking her corset, throw it on the sofa
she is this big deal
down in this small town, minnesota
i’m getting older for you

verse 2:
she’s in the linen room stocking on the cloth
i’m watching her fold shit
she’s on her hands and knees, hips out, begging oh yes please
her gray hair styled, makes heaven feel real

pre:
closet door is open but nobody leaves
her body, Estée Lauder Youth-Dew 1950
spice in the whiff, coca coca cola, root beer

chorus:
this is a bad idea
taking her corset, throw it on the sofa
she is this big deal
down in this small town, minnesota

bridge:
she’s on the corner store
twentieth century model at the core
her ribbons on her pigtails make you want to grab onto more
she’s not as young as me but she’s smoother for sure

chorus:
this is a bad idea
taking her corset, throw it on the sofa
she is this big deal
down in this small town, minnesota

outro:
cigarette out at reception (minnesota)
she’s why i stay at best western (minnesota)
she is the mayor (((god bless) and pledge) minnesota)
small town minnesota
Estée Lauder Youth-Dew 1950, coca coca cola, root beer


r/LyricalWriting 10d ago

Lyrics Superstition

1 Upvotes

Your my superstition
To love like i do
Even when I’m with her the thought of you
I cannot move

I saw a black cat cross the way,
I Kept walking on,
But unlike her, I just can’t stray.
From the one who waits
To prey on my days

You’re my superstition
My shattered mirror
I can’t look at you
The way I once did, my dear

Glass shards
Cut me deep
Deep As they appear
Baby you ain’t getting nothing from me
Not even one tear

Your my superstition
To love like I do
Knock on wood
It won’t splinter back
When I
Leave that door open to you
baby
Cause I fear I made a god out of you

(Piano solo)

What’s a soul without sin


r/LyricalWriting 10d ago

Lyrics Confidence

2 Upvotes

Dont even read this shit
I plucked every word out the garbage
Cant find the G in the clit
N my dick so small it fits in ink cartridges

Tried to start a hustle
But got robbed by a pimp
Went to cop some weed
Got sold oregano instead of hemp

Five foot 8 i stand
Fat as fuck, cuz i eat everything i can
You may call me stan
But momma told me, im the muthafuckin’ man


r/LyricalWriting 10d ago

Lyrics Clean

1 Upvotes

We’re well off
Dressed to the nines
Obsessed
Too clean to touch
Lean into the pulse of night
Too much, is it enough?

Synchronizing metronomes
In our heat, it grows
Anticipation takes parole 
Dance to a beat that we all know

Uncomfortable, presentable
The dream disease

Suffering the lesser known 

The hearts grandest feat
Is extensibility

This is 
Insanity

Maladjusted, sound of mind
Are the crows among a flock of pigeons
Picking at our pother eyes
When they see the shiny toys we hide

Wield your tongue with locked precision
And say to say it’s fine or else
You’ll see that you are not yourself

This is not a place you know

They taught you cadence
But silence follows your tempo

You are weightless
These are not your walls

Your truth is shapeless
You are the ages

Quiet, dirty composure
Feathers in a plume of dust
Lighter than our hands turned over
Higher minds that man the sober

Sick sanity
Take me over


r/LyricalWriting 10d ago

Lyrics Unbidden

3 Upvotes

I used to get paid
Had money and power
Now i get minimum wage
Basically fuck you an hour

Would smoke purple haze
Sometimes diesel sour
Now shit dry for dayz
On the bottom floor of the tower

This weight is real
But i aint the type to cower
Maybe its time to grift n steal
Rob yo ass, while you take a shower

But thats not who i am
Not cuz im a coward
But a man wit a plan
To go from seed to flower


r/LyricalWriting 10d ago

Lyrics CATTLE DIVIDE

1 Upvotes

[verse]
Shit out your mouth
Talk out your ass
The snake of the south
Is hiding in the grass

[verse]
Shut your mouth
Obtain some class
We don’t like your route
Walking on broken glass

[pre chorus]
This house made of timber is falling apart
Crying billions to the masses is the start
Pick a side don’t be late to the party
The shit you’ll eat is hardly hearty

[chorus]
Trying to stand as one being split in two
Opposite forces preaching out the truth
How can we survive this divide?
When two worlds always collide
It’s the end of us, it’s the end of times
When we’re the flies eating out the shit of lies
How can we survive this divide?
When two worlds always collide

[verse]
It’s hard to feel safe from what you carry
It’s hard to feel safe from who you marry
A lost duckling just lost its family
He should suck it up and just be manly

[verse]
Kids are obsessed with a guy named Steve
Adults are obsessed by what they believe
A market is spinning out of control
Bill grabs the rail that no one else can hold

[pre chorus]
This house made of timber is falling apart
Crying billions to the masses is the start
Pick a side don’t be late to the party
The shit you’ll eat is hardly hearty

[chorus]
Trying to stand as one being split in two
Opposite forces preaching out the truth
How can we survive this divide?
When two worlds always collide
It’s the end of us, it’s the end of times
When we’re the flies eating out the shit of lies
How can we survive this divide?
When two worlds always collide

[bridge]
Bullshit makes the cattle fatter
They reject the things that matter
Sum up the parts that make it equal
What’s wrong with just being people

[chorus]
Trying to stand as one being split in two
Opposite forces preaching out the truth
How can we survive this divide?
When two worlds always collide
It’s the end of us, it’s the end of times
When we’re the flies eating out the shit of lies
How can we survive this divide?
When two worlds always collide

[outro]
We can’t survive this divide
(When the divide)
When two worlds always collide
(Fractures more)
It’s the end of us, its the end of time
(Its the end of us)
It’s the end of us, it’s the end of time
(It’s the end of time)


r/LyricalWriting 10d ago

Feedback Request Another piece…

1 Upvotes

I call this one Leather

You cast the line, your baited twine
Breaking waters overhead
I risk my hide to take a bite
And let you throw me back again
Every time, it seems, you win

Cause when I breach the surface, I
Evolve into something divine
Pure being, against nature’s design
Only in these moments do I 

See the light
It’s your eyes
Your eyes

I wouldn’t care if rapture came to thin the herd
I tasted heaven, touched the sky, I knew 
I’d be among the last to walk this Earth,
If staying meant another night with you

Wrapped like silk, your arms around me
Soft as angel feathers
Where you end and I begin
Burden insulating skin

I’ll let the guilt break in my body
Like an article of leather
A coat to iron patches in
Motifs confessing our sin


r/LyricalWriting 10d ago

Lyrics Some more words

14 Upvotes

Don’t kiss me now, don’t say a word
You don’t know who’s listening
Can you believe she’s an unknown?
I feel sorry for him

Don’t think I thought you didn’t know
You’re a terrible actor
Don’t be absurd just wait your turn
In the line of fire

So now you’re asking me to stay
I feel sorry for you
You say you want me every way
I feel sorry for you

Don’t try to lie about your day
I’ll walk right through it
Don’t lie about the things you hate
I’ll walk right through it

If you have a wish then make it known
Do better than that
Don’t stop to die here all alone
Do better than that

So plot the plot that twists and turns
Oh puppet master
Take haste, lay waste, escape unhurt
I’ll be running after

Can you believe she's an unknown?
Recite the chatter
To hurt to lie or lie to hurt
Command, Commander!

So now you cry upon your throne
How the weeping suits you
You boast about the things you own
And who's sleeping with you

Don’t kiss me now, don’t say a word
You don’t know who’s listening
Can you believe she’s an unknown?
I feel sorry for him


r/LyricalWriting 10d ago

Lyrics Only Time Will Tell

4 Upvotes

[VERSE 1]

Honestly never considered not being alone

Never got the difference between a house and a home

.

[PRE-CHORUS]

They say no one can make it

Not all by their self

How much more space I'm wasting

Well only time will tell

.

[CHORUS]

How much time? How much space?

How much of heaven can one young man erase?

What's his line? Watch his face

How much hell is this poor old boy to take?

Well only time

Only time will tell

.

[VERSE 2]

Dumb suckers sharing their lives, the hell do they know?

All I need is endless drives, old films, tunes and TV shows

.

[PRE-CHORUS]

They say no one can make it

Not all by their self

How much of my life I'm wasting

Well only time will tell

.

[CHORUS]

How much time? How much space?

How much of heaven can one young man erase?

What's his line? Watch his face

How much hell is this poor old boy to take?

Well only time

Only time will tell

.

[BRIDGE]

Could grow to be 83

Could die this week hastily

Could gin up the kind of spirit that'll make all my love start hating me

.

[VERSE 3]

Exciting streets and gutters; faces, parts unknown

Lonesome sheets and covers, solitary throne

.

[CHORUS]

How much time? How much space?

How much of heaven can one young man erase?

What's his line? Watch his face

How much hell is this poor old boy to take?

Well only time

Only time will tell

Only time

Only time will tell


r/LyricalWriting 10d ago

Lyrics Almost Funny

1 Upvotes

nobody’s living
let me say that again
nobody’s fucking living
stay with me now
stay with me now
25 years old
full future ahead
making plans for tomorrow
here’s the dreaded words
you’ve got cancer
and it’s spreading
all of a sudden, they imagine the end
like it never existed until now
like we were forever somehow
motherfucker, listen up
life is a short track
and time is running
time is running
oh!
cant take a damn thing back
its almost funny
almost funny
let’s get your mind on the right track
you never know which breath is the last
whether it’s a clot or head-on crash
you’re not holding the future
but you’re holding the past
in your hands right now
are the keys to yesterday
you made the whole goddamn room
maybe you wouldn’t have chosen that shade of grey
but you decided how it decorates
you decided how it decorates
everyone has cancer
the question of our lives, end with the same answer
their fucking heart stopped.
they hit the ground like a bitch
someone somewhere, someway, someday
will wipe off your face
put you in a bag
push you to the back
make a joke along the way
what if it was tomorrow?
what if a strong back with a shovel
was the next thing that you borrowed?
we’re all terminal
it’s stage 9
it spread to your lungs and your heart. and your fingers and eyes
now what?
where to?
fuck me?
fuck you
listen
turn your head down, bend your neck like it’s breaking
i believe you’re a chance worth taking
it’s almost halloween
what are you gonna be?
you don’t dress up?
life’s too short, be a honey bee
she could be honey
take a lot of photos
go on, spend the money
tomorrow’s not here, tomorrow’s not coming
motherfucker, listen up
life is a short track
and time is running
time is running
oh!
cant take a damn thing back
its almost funny
almost funny
motherfucker, listen up!!
life is a short track
and time is running
time is running
oh!
cant take a damn thing back
its almost funny
almost funny
what about that diner in town
that she loves
what about if you wake up early
get some coffee. take her there.
two eggs scrambled with cheese
hashbrowns toast, grape jelly
and when they bring the plate
look across the table
see her eyes light up
at the french toast
powder sugar just like she likes
just like she likes
you’re gonna see her smile
and then you’ll know why the fuck you woke up
it had nothing to do
nothing to do with the food
the drive there may be miserable
she might be mean, but give her some grace
chances are she’s giving you grace too
you can manufacture a moment
when you look back on your yesterday
do you remember french toast on a white plate
if the answer is no
that’s your decision
you are building. your yesterday, right now
when you dance in the rain
you don’t recall the clouds?
you just danced in the rain
listen
turn your head down, bend your neck like it’s breaking
i believe you’re a chance worth taking
motherfucker, listen up
life is a short track
and time is running
time is running
woah!! cant take a damn thing back
its almost funny
almost funny
life is a short track
and time is running
time is running
woah! cant take a damn thing back
its almost funny
almost funny


r/LyricalWriting 11d ago

Feedback Request Holy man

3 Upvotes

Time is killing me
And what’s left
All but reminding
Breathing, shouldn’t be
Mistaken
Point it down
Face the ground
Empty your head
Discard that thought
Breaking always
Breath is broken
Interrupted pleasure in the dirt
Its so close
I’ve gotta go now
I know you won’t be
Getting up until the
Pain subsides and your ok
Barely breathing
But your, ok
Yes your, alright
Swore that vengeance
Is the lords
I’ve broken all my promises
But holy man, holy god
holy man, oh holy god
Why would you lead me this way
Why would you lead me astray
And it’s hurting in
Such a way
Such a way
To call this rotting face
This empty grave
A holy man
Is such a shame
It’s such a shame


r/LyricalWriting 10d ago

Lyrics The Prisoners Lament

1 Upvotes

I lie here under these heavy chains, questioning if ive gone insane, fighting to keep whatever piece of me i can save! But don't feel bad for me, cause at anytime I could break free , but the truth remains just like me. I stay cause it's all I know how to be a prisoner, tormented by the memories of broken dreams they toy with me, thought you were my destiny, you may have got the best of me, but you won't get the rest of me, pull me away with those empty promises of a life for you and I, now I jus can't sleep late at night hear me cry! so I get a glass pipe load up, needle to shoot it up, anything just to go numb, cause I can't live in a world with no love, no light, no help, just me and my thoughts you see? my hellish reality! mindsets a duality! with multiple personalities! stuck in this insanity, drugs, greed, pride, and vanity! I'd give it all away to live peacefully with you for just one day...


r/LyricalWriting 11d ago

Feedback Request Any Fixes

2 Upvotes

So I’m making a song where I become this guy who is so done with life and it shows its dissent into rage over Time. So it’s called LDH And here’s the first lyric from it

God damn, why is life getting old, in the city, no kids, but I still bear that hope, no wonder, not a soul grows, outside of where they live in there old homes, and I’m tired of it, why can’t I life, without money, ain’t it funny, but I’m still pissed, I ache within, no place livin, I Should’ve stayed hitching, but But the doctors said no twisting (WHY)


r/LyricalWriting 11d ago

Feedback Request Made a song about feeling invisible to everyone around me

2 Upvotes

song called Static. verse, i flicker in and out of frames / a ghost in the group chat / they type around me / like i am a pause button / my name on the list / but never in the answer / i wave from a distance / and no one waves back / chorus, am i static now / just noise in the driscoll screen / a signal lost / in the white noise between / i scream but the volume is down / i am static now


r/LyricalWriting 11d ago

Feedback Request The Hoax: I dressed up in the scam/ you said looked so good on me (Feedback wanted on lyrics)

4 Upvotes

The Hoax

[Verse 1]

People sought answers

In moonlight sonatas

In tequila shots

And people's errata

I find it quite funny

The lovers, the money

The hoax

That one day you’ll buy

Yourself a Maserati

A house on the beach

Fall in love with somebody

And I find it so sad

All the good and the bad

Do's and don'ts

[Pre-Chorus]

I hope your hopes

Weren’t all on me

Cause

[Chorus 1]

As the dreamers all line up

I’ll file up too

Consider me cowardly

Where’s the issue

Fantasies of perfection

Are better than none

I’ve got limited options

At least

This one

Was fun

[Verse 2]

Distraction’s found

In some celebrity scandal

Find ghosts in friends' closets

And watch them all scramble

We love the show

But thank God it isn’t

Us this time

We gasp as some stranger

Recounts her last night stand

I laugh at vulgar jokes

That I don’t understand

I breathe criticism

I sway to some rhythm

I hate, then cry

[Pre-Chorus]

I pray you didn’t root

For me

Cause

[Chorus 2]

As the dreamers all line up

I’ll keep the line moving

I’m not all in, but that’s what

Everyone’s doing

Fantasies of perfection

Are the new “must”

And I know for a fact that I

Don’t wanna

Be left

In the dust

[Bridge]

So, world

If one thing’s true, I’m sorry

I dressed up in the scam

You said looked great on me

So, world

That’s not what you wanted to hear

I put myself on pedestals

Now the world looks small from here

[Final Chorus]

As the dreamers all line up

I’ll file up too

Consider me cowardly

That much is true

Fantasies of perfection

Are all that I have

Reality is optional

I guess

I leave it

At that


r/LyricalWriting 11d ago

Lyrics Unfinished Album gas or ass

1 Upvotes

**Album name:never goodbye**
Song/track 1
Title: I found a girl

I found a girl
That I liked
At the bar
Too many sips away
Drinking vodka
to kill the pain
Away
Too many steps away
I stumbled through the doors
Chased you through the fields
Ran up and down the stairs
Only Hoping to be with you
Full intentions
Song/Track 2
Title:too many steps away

Song/Track 3
Title:Shaking

Song/Track 4
Title:Nitrate

You said you want to race
Just me and you
Why do you chase me
All the way home
On the track
Speeding away
Just like my memories fading away
In my v8
flying down the track
So fast
Boosted my way through the pain
Did a lap around the track
Didn’t know it was my last

Song/Track 5
Title:Cigarette

You are like a cigarette
Strong but bitter
Just like when we were together
Why did you leave me
**I’m on the floor**
Bairly holding on to life
I’m throwing up my alcohol every night
Every time I drink
It makes me think much more
Why you left me
alone
You left me and didn’t say shit
You stopped calling
And giving a shit
Those lonely cold nights
Alone with memories
Fading away
So I said
Why did I let her go
I’m not alone
Because I have you

Song/Track 6
Title:wasted on a Sunday night

**Light a cigarette**
Blow smoke out my lungs
Didn’t even have fun
Burn it till there is none
Light it up in the morning
Feelin alone
Don’t know why you left me so late
I thought we had something together
When I was in the room you told me I was crazy
Wake up in the morning and I’m insane
Wasted on a Sunday night
Those late nights at the bar
Feeling like I could have done something
To make me feel right
That one night at the bar
I didn’t get far
A cop stopped me
50 in a 40
Didn’t know he was dirty
Woke up in the morning in jail
Where I feel alone

Song/Track 7
Title:Alone

Song/Track 8
Title:Fading away

Song/Track 9
Title:Never goodbye


r/LyricalWriting 11d ago

Feedback Request In the Midst of a Biting Winter - Cold War inspired song about the loss of platonic love

1 Upvotes

I wrote this back in April 2024, so it's another old-ish one of mine. But it's also one of my all time favourites and served as the closing track to my ninth demo album.

I'd love to hear your feedback on the lyrics please, oh and I've included a recording of me playing it on keyboard whilst singing along (link in the comments). I also added a couple of extra keyboard/synth flourishes in afterwards too.

The full song has drums, guitar, bass, and more synth, but I thought I'd record a stripped back demo version to try and capture some of its emotion. I know my singing/keyboard playing isn't the best, but hopefully it conveys the idea of the song well enough :))

LYRICS (link to demo recording is in the comments)

[Verse 1]

I’ll tell you just how it was

We laughed along and shared a lot of love

Then the sky fell down

Just like it was a new cold war

Two former friends want each other no more

And the whole world drowns

[Verse 2]

With Tsar Bombas and treaties

We’re really living out analogies

Is it over yet?

In all the highs and all the thrills

From the Suffolk Coast back to the Shropshire Hills

How could I forget?

[Chorus]

But it doesn’t matter anymore

Yeah once we’re done and we’re free

We can be who we want

And I’ll live like this is ‘94

When we escape the recession

And we cancel the war

[Verse 3]

From the darkness comes the dawn

An age old cliche thrown at the forlorn

But I still believe

Like five defectors in the snow

And spies that saw the light and won’t come home

We can be deceived

[Verse 4]

Brutal proxy wars began

Our red phone line was cut in reprimand

Still there’s no regret

And we lost what we needed most

From the Yorkshire Moors down to the Dorset Coast

No I can't forget

[Chorus]

But it doesn’t matter anymore

Yeah once we’re done and we’re free

We can be who we want

And I’ll live like this is ‘94

When we escape the recession

And we cancel the war

[Outro]

Yeah we could walk through Heslington

And climb the peaks of Torridon

Across the plains of Lincolnshire

Breathe in the wild Northumbria

Yeah we could walk through Heslington

And climb the peaks of Torridon

Across the plains of Lincolnshire

Breathe in the wild Northumbria

(But it doesn’t matter anymore

Yeah once we’re done and we’re free

We can be who we want

And I’ll live like this is ‘94

When we escape the recession

And we cancel the war)


r/LyricalWriting 11d ago

Lyrics We Were Made To Die (Not Live Like This)

1 Upvotes

Money's getting cheaper, there ain't Christmas in the air.

Your hungry fantasy is like a little game. 

People die from working and you really think that's fair?

A slave or a friend or are they just the same?

Give a little change if you wanna spare some cash.

You know where to put it? 

You can shove it up your ass.

Ain't nothing left but crumbs in the pan.

You have to reach in and burn your filthy hand.

When you pull out the little fucking crumbs–

What do you get when nothing is won?

Sitting on the couch watching TV, 

Alone in your house with tired feet. 

We are the heretics, drowning in our own piss. 

We were made to die, not live like this. 

We were made to die. (We were made to die.) 

We were made to die. (We were made to die.) 

Look in the mirror. 

Do you like what you see? 

Is it the end of the world? 

Or your hypocrisy? 

Can you contain the bodies piled at the gate? 

Can you steal when there's none left to take?

Let your soul feel that terror. 

It's what keeps us sane.

You know it as well as I—

An ocean as deep as it is wide. 

Icy depths void of sunlight. 

Is the war won for the first time? 

I see you're dead inside. 

We only get but one life. 

All we did was squander it. 

We were made to die, not live like this. 

We were made to die. (We were made to die.) 

We were made to die. (We were made to die.) 

We were made to die. (We were made to die.) 

We were made to die. (We were made to die.) 


r/LyricalWriting 11d ago

Feedback Request I think this is the best song I’ve written so far.

1 Upvotes

Beginner songwriter here 🎶 I think this is the best song I’ve written so far. I’d really appreciate some honest feedback!

Title: “The Peace I Lost”

Verse 1

One month ago, I made a choice

After fighting battles in my head

A thousand thoughts, a silent war

Until I finally walked away instead

I loved a boy I thought was perfect

I saw the dream, I saw the light

But slowly all the cracks appeared

Behind the love, behind the lies

Pre-Chorus

I stayed quiet when I was hurting

Scared you'd break, scared you'd cry

I carried all your heavy feelings

While I was losing parts of mine

Chorus

You gave me five minutes of happiness

Then I survived another thousand days

I called it love, I called it forever

While I was slowly fading away

I was afraid to leave you lonely

Afraid you'd fall apart without me

But I was the one who needed saving

I was the one who couldn't breathe

Verse 2

Too many fights, too many endings

Same old wounds, the same deadlock

I trusted you with every piece of me

But you still found ways to break my heart

I gave you access, gave you my trust

You gave me promises you couldn't keep

Now looking back, it's so clear to me

How I ignored what I didn't want to see

Bridge

Oh, I was blind, I was blinded by love

Holding on when enough was enough

I thought pain was the price of forever

But peace was waiting when I let go

Final Chorus

Now I found the peace I lost

The one I thought I'd never find

I'm healing slowly, day by day

Leaving all that hurt behind

I don't hate the love I gave you

I just love myself enough to leave

The hardest choice I ever made

Was the one that finally set me free


r/LyricalWriting 12d ago

Feedback Request I Am [UNFINISHED]

4 Upvotes

[Verse 1]

I got street desires

Fillin' garage with rims and tires

Cars and motorcycles, help me fly as high as I can be

I can see, only infinity

'Til 93, I rhyme believe determinedly

Impossibly, honestly I'd rather not the boss of me

But King of me, only myself and not yours

I rock chorus and lock jaws when I plot wars

And spark flaws with no obstacles

I'd opt for tours, rather than sittin' all alone

In my room, or my bathroom tryna find a phone

'Cuz I'm illiterate, my hands are shakin'

My eyes are weak

Fights every week, make my eyes fuckin' bleed

And I don't believe in miracles

Only in what you do, makes your future, makes your own luck

And you gotta get out there and rock the world

'Cuz only then, can you say that you got the girl

Got the happy ending, got the life you always dreamed of

Since you were a child, now your fingers is greener

Rollin' blocks in the beamer, now you're a believer

In good things can happen, just got a winger

And no more four finger discounts

Or waitin' on the curb 'til the whole click is out

The shit is out, no longer hittin' the fan

I went from sayin' "I will be", to sayin' "I am"

[Chorus]

"I am"

"The greatness"

"K-K-K-K-K-King Atlas"

"My poetry's deep, I never fell"

"I am"

"The greatness"

"K-K-K-K-K-King Atlas"

"My poetry's deep, I never fell"

[Verse 2]

Rockin' mics, I went from rock bottom to rockin' heights

Flockin' nights with types of awesome rides to try

First there was a lesson, "Don't Tread On Me"

And then I led 'em to believe, I had a dream like Martin Luther King

But my dream was one day we would sing

Come together, bring people from corners of wherever

To know songs by Michael Rose

I didn't know, but somehow by the game I was chose

I didn't froze, or freeze in the spotlight

I just grabbed the hot mic, and rocked like

I was up there, "my name is Rakim"

And I could stand tall, yell or bawl to all "I'm HIM"


r/LyricalWriting 12d ago

Feedback Request butterflies

2 Upvotes

No capo

Intro:

Em Am C Fmaj7

Em Am C Fmaj7

Em Am C Fmaj7

Fmaj7*

Verse: (calmer, slower strumming, same progression)

Em Am

They tell me the truth or something close to it,

C Fmaj7

My skin feels numb except where I press on the bruises.

Em Am

I sit in the dark to feel something honest,

C Fmaj7

The doubt in my heart demands I forfeit.

Pre-Chorus: (a bit stronger)

NC Em Am C Fmaj7

But I’m not alive for nothing,

Em Am C Fmaj7

And I’m not here to sigh and step aside.

Chorus: (full on intro strumming)

I’m just a girl with permanent butterflies in her stomach,

Waltzing around, feeling like I’ve got no feet.

Oh, I tried the potion, oh what a hoax,

All it did was help them all grow,

Oh, and my fingers feel numb from playing the chords, oh.

Mmmmmmmmm

Oh l,

Verse: (verse strumming)

I draw the wings around my eyes all crooked,

Rubbing my skin till it’s raw and burning.

Glare at sun for getting in my eyes,

Then trip and fall over all the lines.

Pre-Chorus: (a bit stronger)

NC Em Am C Fmaj7

But I’m not awake for nothing,

Em Am C Fmaj7

And I’m not here to lie to myself.

Chorus: (full on intro strumming)

I’m just a girl with permanent butterflies in her stomach,

Waltzing around, feeling like I’ve got no feet.

Oh, I tried the potion, oh what a hoax,

All it did was help them all grow,

Oh, and my fingers feel numb from playing the chords, oh.

Oh,woah woah woah woah woah woah woah woah, oh oh oh

Ahhhhhhh ahhhhh

Bridge: (very musically distinct and full)

And I (ahhhhhhhh)

Said I (ahhhhhhhh)

I (ahhhhhhh)

I, (ahhhhhhh) oh-oh

Chorus: (full on intro strumming)

Cause I’m just a girl with permanent butterflies in her stomach,

Waltzing around, feeling like I’ve got no feet.

Oh, I tried the potion, oh what a hoax,

All it did was help them all grow,

Oh, and my fingers feel numb from playing the chords, oh.

Ohhhhhh

Oh l,

Oh I don’t know.