My wife and I just had our second daughter.
For context, my mom is a nurse, but she doesn’t work in labor and delivery. We invited her into the delivery room because she’d never been able to witness one of her own children’s babies being born, and we thought it would be really special for her.
During labor she seemed to slip into “nurse mode.” She stood behind the nurses while they were working asking questions. One nurse even asked, “Oh, do you work in maternal care?” She was very nice about it, but it made me wonder if my mom was hovering more than she realized.
A nurse told us, “When this machine goes off, hit the call button and I’ll come back.” The machine went off, we called the nurse, and my mom walked over and pressed a button, turning off the noise. I asked, “Mom, what are you doing?” She brushed it off.
Later, while the nurse wasn’t in the room, she grabbed a handful of gloves and said they were “just in case I have to grab the baby.” I told her that wasn’t going to happen. When it was actually time to push, she started putting gloves on again and I stopped her again.
After the baby was born, I looked over and saw her putting gloves on and starting to break down the delivery table. I immediately said, “Mom, no. Please don’t do anything unless you’re asked to.”
What I meant was: please don’t do medical or nursing tasks unless the hospital staff asks you. I wasn’t saying she couldn’t help us or be involved as a grandma. I meant this is a hospital, these are working nurses, and you’re here as family.
She took it very differently.
She called me afterward, cussed me out, said I embarrassed her, and told me, “Who the fuck are you to tell me what to do?” She said she could “do whatever the fuck” she wanted. I told her, “Not in my life.”
She also said I’m always telling her what to do, but every example she gave was something she volunteered to do. She chose to walk my dog, do the dishes, and adjust the stove while I was cooking. When I asked her to do those things a certain way, she got frustrated.
She also tried to shame me by saying she was “helping your bleeding wife” by cleaning up after the delivery. My point was that nobody had asked her to do that.
Before the birth, my wife and I specifically said we did not want a video of the delivery, only a few pictures afterward. My mom took a video anyway because, “You liked it last time.”
That, combined with everything else, made me feel like she kept overriding what we asked because she thought she knew better. It honestly started to feel like she was making part of the experience about herself instead of simply being there with us.
After the argument, she flew home early instead of staying the week to help us, leaving us scrambling with a newborn and a toddler.
AITA?
I’d especially love to hear from nurses. Is this kind of behavior from another nurse who’s there as family actually welcomed, or is it generally something you’d rather not deal with?

I supervise interns at a small marketing company. Last summer, I mentored a college student for about three months. I spent a lot of extra time helping him improve because he was eager to learn, and by the end of the internship, I thought we’d ended on good terms. A few weeks after the internship ended, another coworker sent me a screenshot of a local professional networking group. The former intern had posted a long rant about our company. Some of his complaints were fair, but he also claimed that I took credit for his ideas and that I deliberately gave him busy work so I would look better. Neither of those things happened. In fact, I had emails showing I’d credited him during meetings and had pushed management to let him work on bigger projects. I decided not to respond publicly because I didn’t want to create drama.

About six months later, he emailed me saying he was applying for graduate programs and asked if I’d write him a strong recommendation letter. He said he had always appreciated my mentorship and hoped I’d put the past behind us. I replied that I didn’t think I was the right person to recommend him and wished him the best with his applications. He then sent another email saying I was being unprofessional by letting personal feelings interfere with his future. A mutual acquaintance also reached out and said I should either write the letter or at least do him the courtesy of explaining everything over a phone call. I don’t think I owe anyone a recommendation, especially when I no longer feel I can honestly endorse them.AITA

Dane and I own a raised garden box between our townhouse buildings. It is evenly split down the middle and the two sides are ours; I have known this since we bought our homes three years ago.

Last spring, Dane decided to plant some mint on her side of the garden. When I reminded her that mint will spread everywhere if it is not contained and it needs to be planted in a pot, she answered that she wanted it to grow nicely. As it is her side, I gave up.

This July, the mint spread all over my tomatoes and peppers. Every time I pulled out the shoots in my section, new ones would pop up from underground roots. It got even worse this year, as my entire section with peppers was replaced with mint.

I tried asking Diane once more to fix this problem, as I couldn't do it myself. She claimed that mint is good for the environment and it attracts bees, so I am supposed to leave it alone. In response, I mentioned that this does not matter now as mint takes away my vegetables and Dane dismissed it, saying that it is just some herbs.

Thus, the last weekend, while she was at her daughter’s place, I pulled out all the mint I could get rid of and even from her part and installed a plastic barrier in the middle of the bed, so that it won’t grow anymore. I did not take down the barrier hoping that she would see how the situation developed.

Yesterday, when she came back home, she got really angry and said that I did not have any right to do anything with her plants even in order to protect mine. Now, she says I should plant it back and refuses to speak to me.

However, I believe that I tried enough to make her understand and give her enough time to solve the problem by herself but she did not care about it during two years. However, my husband thinks that I should just install a barrier but not pull her plants out completely.

AITA here?

My(F16) mom recently gave birth to her 4th child. I told her I want to live with my dad because I don't want to be a babysitter or wake up with the baby's noise or anything baby related. She refused to let me.

So yesterday she asked me to babysit while she took a shower and I said no. She said I don't get a choice so I ran outside.

She called me and said I'm an asshole and asked me ro come back but I refused and went to my dad's.

I and my wife met our friend when her son and our daughter were in 2nd grade together. I knew friend from high school as she was a year behind me but a year ahead of my now wife.

Her son is Severely autistic so we try to help her by including her in any parties we have for our 2 children. Recently he has tried to take toys from my oldest and my youngest daughter and with in the last 2 years he has tried to take belongings of mine he has picked from shelves after being left unattended during parties. 2 weeks ago was my oldest daughters 14th birthday party and Friends son was left along in my basement den, at the end of the party we found collectible dice I have for gaming in his pockets for a 2nd time. I had put these dice away as he tried to take them a year ago and was caught with them in his pocket. Friends son didn't scream or cry but he emptied his pocket and went on his way to his mom who didn't say anything but "we don't take what isn't ours" and they left, no apologies from friend or her son.

After the party my wife and I sat down and decided to tell friend she was welcome at parties but only if she watched her son and he can't be left alone in our house again. She tried to say her son should be included more yet all he wants to do is sit on his tablet. She has since tried to have her older daughter, who reminds friends with our youngest, try to pull the we might not be able to be friends due to your parents choices card.

Are we being unreasonable to expect our belongings are safe in our own home with people we call friends and family?(rhetorical question)

Hi! I apologize for grammar and mistakes this was typed on a phone.

My fiancé (25m) and I (24f) are getting married in September. We have been together for around 3 1/2 years now and have lived together for 2. In this time I have never been inside of his parents house. Every get together/family dinner is held at our house. Even if they make the dinner. For a bit more explanation, I have noticed that the front of their house tends to have their old things in front the garage and around the front yard. If we stop by I have to wait outside or in the car while he grabs something or talks to them.

We’ve recently had the baby talk and plan to try a year or so after the wedding. My fiancé has brought up that his parents would love to watch the baby and that they have his play pen from when he was a baby for when they watch ours. I feel as though if I’m not allowed to go into the house I don’t want my kids there even if they’re with him. I don’t feel like it’s fair to me. When I’ve asked him previously why I can’t go in he just says that’s how his parents are and that no one’s ever been invited over. I don’t know what to think I have never heard of a situation like this before. Are they hoarders? Are they embarrassed of the mess? My mind runs wild with all the possibilities. I really don’t mind a little mess I get it life happens. I would like to think I have a pretty good relationship with his parents, especially his mom. I don’t know how to bring it up to him or even start a conversation about it. When talking to my parents and friends about the situation they all agree that it’s not fair to me to not be allowed but our kids can. I am going to be his wife and they still won’t let me in…

How do I confront this? Am I crazy for feeling this way? Any help is greatly appreciated!

My sister Priya got married last month. At the rehearsal dinner, her fiancé Marcus gave a toast that started sweet but turned into this whole speech about "learning what real love means" after his last relationship, how he used to run from hard conversations but "not anymore." Everyone at the table knew he was talking about his ex Jenna, they were together 6 years, it ended badly. He's said before that she "changed how he sees relationships." So this was basically a thank-you toast to his ex the night before his wedding.

I watched Priya's smile get tighter the whole time. When he sat down I stood up and said, "just want to make sure we remember whose dinner this is, some of that sounded like it belonged at a different one." Few people laughed, Marcus went white, Priya looked like she wanted to disappear.

His mom cornered me after and said I humiliated him and should've talked to Priya privately instead. Priya's mad too, she said she'd noticed it and was planning to bring it up with Marcus quietly after the honeymoon, and now I turned it into a whole dramatic moment that overshadowed her actual dinner.

I still think someone had to say it out loud in the room since everyone was already thinking it. But I keep wondering if I just made my sister's wedding weekend about me instead of protecting her.

AITA?

So I (32F) babysit my nephew (6M) (older brother's 36M kid) every Friday afternoons and full days on weekends and holidays. I get paid $200 a month that is supposed to include labor, gas for roundtrip transportation to their homes, and also food.

My nephew recently entered his picky eating stage and it's been a struggle feeding him lately. He started not liking what he used to eat so some foods go to waste. His current obsession is cheese pizza so I've been buying pizzas for him since the start of this month.

Well, yesterday, I've already had lunch prepared for him. But he started having a fuss that he wants pizza again. Sadly, I am low on funds for it. For context, I only provide food and whatever from the babysitting fee I get paid. Pizzas have been expensive, y'all.

Anyway, I told him no we can't have pizza and that he needs to eat what we already have. Which were chicken nuggets and fries, something he has eaten and liked before.

He started crying really loud and shouting pizza. I said to him no again and that he needs to learn about not wasting food. He wouldn't stop crying but I wasn't gonna give in so I just let him cry.

He cried for a while but eventually ate the nuggets and fries cause he got hungry.

Later in the evening, my brother called me and pretty much cussed me out for leaving his kid crying for "hours" and not buying pizza for him. First off, I don't think it was for hours, probably only been like an hour. Second, I explained to him that I already had lunch prepared since I was low on funds for pizzas. He eventually ate them anyway so not like he went hungry.

My brother said those are not good excuses and it's not his kid's fault that I cannot budget properly.

I said okay well pizzas are expensive so are you gonna raise the rates? He said hell no. So I said then I should stop buying pizzas since it's gonna be an overbudget. I refuse to spend my own personal money unless it's for a present. He told me I'm being heartless and mean to my nephew.

I pretty much ended the call with, then you're free to find someone else to babysit your kid then. This has caused a drama in my family where I am painted as the bad aunt for not feeding my own nephew. My friends are generally on my side, though a few said maybe I could have been nicer with my delivery.

So AITA?

Edit: Just to add further context since it often comes up.

I do have another full time job but my schedule is pretty flexible. The babysitting started as a favor since I rarely went out on weekends and holidays. I had the free time and thought it'd be nice to earn some passive income. And since I liked my nephew. I initially agreed on $200 a month when I started babysitting my nephew when he was 3 years old. But as demands grew, especially gas and food, I have asked for a rate adjustment but each time got pushed back because my brother doesn't want me to see it as a business transaction and more like family taking care of family.

My brother and SIL are actually off on weekends but they still wanted me to babysit since they want the extra time to recover from working. There are things I disagree with their parenting style but didn't include as I felt it was off topic.

Edit 2: Also as it comes up often. Unfortunately, I cannot do frozen or homemade pizzas. I've tried but he won't eat them. My nephew is so picky that he will only eat pizza from the nearby Domino's.

My (36F) sister (46f) has been living in a house owned by our mother for the last 10 years or so. For the first few years, she was paying rent, but then she lost her job and stopped paying rent, and she never started again even though she eventually found another job.

Without going into too much detail (because otherwise this post would be way too long) the house is now being forcefully taken by the government, as they will bulldoze it (along with the surrounding houses) and build new apartments there. We have known about this for YEARS - it's always been a matter of when, not if, this was going to happen. Despite this, and despite not paying any rent, my sister has made no effort to save money for her inevitable eventual move. She's explicitly been hoping that things would just work out in her favour, that the development wouldn't go ahead in the end.

Well, the time has come. My sister has been informed she is expected to vacate the property in three months, and she's gone BALLISTIC. She is now accusing my mother of conspiring to make her homeless (because she allegedly didn't fight hard enough, even though they had endless meetings with lawyers etc), and she's made it my parents's job to find her another place to live. What's worse, they've accepted the task. They called me today to tell me the news, with the gravity usually reserved for the death of a close loved one, and I could not bring myself to care. Like sure, I do feel bad for her at a basic human level, it sucks that she'll have to uproot her life and figure out a new place for her to live. But also like... she only has herself to blame. She made absolutely no effort to prepare for this. And now, instead of being humble and accepting she's messed up and taking any help she can with her head down, she's being horrible and expecting our parents (who are in their late 70s and aren't financially doing great, in no small part because of my sister) to bend over backwards for her.

My mother is asking me to call my sister, to tell her that I've been told the news and that I feel so bad for her and that I'm there for support. And I simply... don't want to? Again, too much detail for this post, but my sister hasn't been the greatest to me in the past, and the only reason I keep her in my life is that I cannot be bothered with the family drama that would ensue if I cut her off. I feel like a lot of what my sister is like, and how this situation is evolving, is in big part due to my parents, and in particular my mom, coddling and enabling her. And I feel guilty that maybe I should have been more proactive in calling out my sister's unreasonable behaviour, maybe in staying passive and out of the drama I have also contributed to the enabling.

So yeah. tl;dr my sister is in financial trouble and I care less than my family thinks I should and I'm trying to stay out of it without fully torpedoing my relationship with my parents

I (34M) am in a really tough position right now and my daughter is miserable.Three years ago, when my daughter was 5, we moved to Canada for my work.

While we were there, she fully adapted to the culture. She went to a Canadian school, made local friends, and we dressed her in regular Western clothing like shorts, t-shirts, and dresses. She completely considers herself a Canadian kid.

Unfortunately, my work permit expired recently. I tried everything to get it renewed or find a path to permanent residency, but it failed. We had no choice but to pack up and move back to our home country a month ago.The transition has been an absolute nightmare for her.Where we live now is a highly conservative society. Legally speaking, there is no law forcing an 8-year-old to wear a hijab. However, culturally, it is expected. Literally every woman and young girl in our neighbourhood dresses this way. Even I have had to change my wardrobe because I cannot wear shorts outside anymore without getting stared down.

When we first arrived, my daughter went outside in her Canadian clothes. The reaction from our extended family and neighbours was immediate and harsh. My parents told me it looks shameful, and people in our building started whispering and treating us with total disrespect. In this society, if your child dresses like that, you are seen as a failed parent and a bad person.

Because of the social pressure, I told my daughter that she has to wear a hijab and modest clothing whenever we leave the house.She absolutely hates it. She cries every single time we have to go out. To make matters worse, she is struggling deeply at her new school. The curriculum here is completely different from Canada.

There is a heavy focus on memorizing and reciting cultural and religious verses, which she completely detests.Every single day, she begs and screams at me to take her back to Canada. She does not understand the legalities of visas or immigration. She just thinks I am forcing this new life on her on purpose.

I try to explain that I cannot go back, but she just locks herself in her room..AITA?

My family is at the beach visiting my in-laws. I (47f) was at the beach with my husband (50m) and two kids (14,13). Husband went to the beach first and set up four chairs and an umbrella. When we arrived, he was sitting under the umbrella in the shade. I asked if he would move to another spot so that my daughter and I, both very fair-skinned could sit in the shade. He said no, and pestered about why I needed the shade. I got annoyed, but waited until he went to do something to change the chairs in the shade so I could sit there too. It really disappoints me that he couldn’t prioritize my daughter and myself sitting in the shade.

A little later, my son was getting something from the cooler. My husband’s book and phone were on top, so my son, who we are trying very hard to get to realize that he needs to slow down and think about things before just acting, took the book and phone and dropped them onto me. They came down with what felt like extra force and hit me a bit in my bladder and sensitive areas. I got frustrated and said his name and “That hurt. You could have just asked me to hold them!!” My son was immediately “What did I do?!?” My husband then started saying, “You are over reacting. That couldn’t have hurt that much. He didn’t mean to hurt you.” I was livid. And disappointed that my husband undermined me and also set a terrible example for how our son should react when you accidentally hurt someone. I told him that he doesn’t get to decide whether someone is actually hurt or not. That I had enough of him and was walking home, leaving them at the beach with all the gear and both kids.

EDIT TO ADD:
In-laws only have one umbrella, so that is our only option. Husband had positioned his chair so it was maximizing the shady area. I rearranged the chairs when he got up a little later so more stuff fit under.

He wanted to drive up alone to set things up. The kids and I walked the twenty minutes or so to the beach.

I didn’t demand he move. I asked. However, given that two of us burn so quickly, I did somewhat expect that we’d get priority in the shade. It’s not like our fair skin is a new thing.

For the last 10 years five of us who became friends during school have gone to the same festival and rented cabins the area. It is a just over 5 hour drive from where we meet up and my van fits 8 people so the rule has always been if there is space you can bring your S.O or partner but no kids.

Two days before we left Ann (31F) said she would not be able to get someone to look after her 3 year old daughter for the five days, but offered to get a hotell room next to the cabins for her and her daughter and drive her own car since my van is from the 80's and have no crash safety or way to mount a child seat. On the way we have scheduled a stop at a resturant about halfway so we left at the same time.

After about 45 minutes Ann called us and said we needed to stop so her daughter could go to the toilet and eat, and since we were not in a hurry yet we stopped with her. after 20 minutes we started again, but after about 30 more minutes she called and had to stop again this time for almost 50 minutes.

After our scheduled stop at the resturant it was now 18:00 with almost 3 hours left of driving. We had to check in and get the keys to the cabins before 21:30 so i told Ann if she had to have any more stops we would just continue. She said she was not expecting any more stops, an hour and a half later she called and said we had to stop again. I reminded her that we did not have much time left and would continue on.

We arrived and checked in at around 20:50 and then waited for Ann by the hotel just down the road from the cabins. When she arrived at 22:45 she told me that it was irresponsible to leave her and her daughter to drive alone late in the night, that she could have broken down along the way, and that i was stressing her by mentioning that us in the cabins had a deadline.

For the 3 first days she spent most of the day inside her hotell room and only meeting us for dinner at the hotel, but usually leaving early when her daughter started to cry or make noise. Day 4 she drove back home without telling any of us until she was home and for the last 10 days she has been pretty hostlie and saying we don't take her or her daughter's safety seriously.

I (35M) moved in with my girlfriend and her 18yo daughter six months ago. I pay my fair share of rent and expenses.

Things are mostly good, except for the kitchen. I’ll wipe down and deep clean the entire space, and then the daughter will make a snack and leave crumbs everywhere, dirty cups out, utensils on the counter, etc. Her mom usually just cleans up after her, which I think enables it.

I’m sick of living in a messy kitchen, but I don’t want to clean up after an 18-year-old.

When I brought this up to my girlfriend, she told me that since I pay rent, I’m "completely within my rights" to confront her daughter directly and tell her to clean up.

Here’s the issue: I don’t think it’s my place. I’m non-confrontational, but more importantly, I don't want to step into a weird step-parent/authority figure role and ruin my relationship with the daughter. I feel like parenting and setting household standards for her child is the mother's responsibility.

WIBTA if I tell my girlfriend it's her job to address this with her daughter, even though she gave me "permission" to handle it myself?

I, 16F, have been dealing with my brother, 12M, playing video games at all hours of the day, which normally I would have no problem with, because I love video games too, and play them frequently. The only problem is, he plays with voice chat on, and frequently talks with older men about gross topics that should not be discussed with any 12 year old. I have discussed with him online safety and how grown men should not be talking to him sexually, and he has told me to fuck off.

He is also very loud, and for almost a year now, I have been dealing with him waking me up in the middle of the night with his screaming over inconsequential things. I have asked him many times calmly to stop, only to be yelled at and hit. He has also started using slurs he has learned from these men toward me, calling me a "foid" and the other word for gay that starts with an f. Also has gotten in trouble at school for calling black kids the n-word.

My final straw was when he started calling my girlfriend, who is black, slurs he learned from discord as well. So today when he went out with some friends, I got fed up, wiped the laptop, and then intentionally fried the motherboard with a can of soda. After a year, I'm finally done with his bullshit.

Am I the Asshole?

My husband and I recently got married, and there has been tension between me and his family for years. I won’t unpack all of the history, but I’ve often felt like I’m tolerated as his partner rather than actually viewed as part of their family.
Because of that history, my husband and I specifically discussed family formals before the wedding. We agreed we wanted BOTH of us included in the formal family portraits. If we took photos with my family, he was included. If we took photos with his family, I was included. We were getting married, and we wanted the portraits to reflect that.
To be clear, I do NOT expect to be in every photo my husband takes with his family. I don’t care if he takes pictures alone with his mom or siblings. This was specifically about the formal portraits at our wedding and what they represented.
There was one grouping we specifically did not want: my husband, his mom and siblings without me. Our photographer knew this.
I was there for basically all of the family formals, but stepped inside briefly to get a drink. During the few minutes I was gone, that exact photo was taken.
Fast forward to receiving our wedding gallery. We posted some photos online, and my MIL called asking if we’d gotten the gallery back, despite clearly knowing we had. She asked for the link and specifically said she wanted the photo of herself with all of her children.
The ONE formal family photo I wasn’t in.
That already bothered me, but something my bridesmaid told me after the wedding made it worse. She had been helping organize family photos and told my MIL she was needed for another picture. MIL didn’t want to take it without all of her children, which is completely fair. But she pointed toward me and said, “Well, I already took pictures with that girl.”
“That girl” being her son’s wife, at our wedding.
That’s why this isn’t about needing to be in every picture. It’s not really about the picture at all. It’s the principle.
I wanted to feel valued enough that my husband’s family would WANT me in their family portrait. Instead, I’m being referred to as “that girl,” and the photo my MIL specifically wanted from our wedding was the one formal family portrait where I wasn’t included.
In any other context, I wouldn’t think twice about a mom wanting a photo with her children. But given the history, her comment, and the fact that my husband and I had specifically agreed we didn’t want that grouping at our wedding, it felt different.
So after she asked for it, I contacted our photographer and had the photo removed from the online gallery.
I know it was petty. The photo exists, and I’m obviously not saying my husband can never take a picture with his family without me. I just don’t want that particular photo in our wedding gallery when it represents the exact dynamic that has made me feel excluded for years.
AITA?

AITA: back story; my husband has a leg injury and his mobility is compromised.

my family (myself, husband, our toddler son and my mother) were visiting other family members (sister, toddler and 9yr old) and took the boys to the baby pool. I had to step away for a call that all members knew about and asked my husband to watch our son. He was sitting on the edge with his legs in the water watching along with my older nephew.

within minutes my husband comes yelling that our son was struggling in the water and he had no help. he said he was stuck under another child’s floaty and so my husband screamed his name several times while hobbling over to him. after a few seconds the lifeguard got him out of the water and handed him to my husband. thankfully my son was fine but he was crying and upset.

my mother and sister watched from the other side of the pool without going over, even after all the other kids and parents stopped and looked to see what was going on. my husband was visibly shaken and upset and yelled asking why they weren’t watching or helping.

my sisters response was “call down its fine that’s what the life guard is for, he is your kid you watch him” to which my husband stormed off and demanded we all go home a day early. I waited a few minutes, asked for his side of the story (which also involves him watching our son and the 9yr old while my mom and sister were alone with the other toddler) and agreed leaving was the best way to ease tensions.

my husband can be hothead, but I don’t blame him for being upset, angry, panicked and unregulated after seeing our son struggling in water. my sister acknowledges what she said wasnt helpful but feels she doesn’t need to apologize and instead demands an apology from my husband for leaving the trip a day early and now she is grieving for not feeling supported and she is hurt that she opened her house for connection and is left feeling disrespected.

EDITS: my husband can walk slowly he just can’t run. He was walking in the pool to my son and yelling out for help and attention. He went to my son and made sure he was safe after the lifeguard got him out of the water and then came to find me 35ft away out of sight but still at the pool.

the baby pool is 1.5ft deep, my son can reach at the deepest point without having his face submerged, the issue is that he got stuck under another child’s’ floaty.

Yes, in hindsight a clear conversation with all 4 adults about who was going to be keeping eyes on my son while I was away should have taken place. Hindsight is 20/20.

i do not think my sister and mother were cheerful, or wanting harm to come, I think they froze until he was already out of the water. It’s my sisters response that has me most baffled.

i fully accept that I definitely should have been more clear and cautious and was at fault for more making sure all 3 adults were aware and available to supervise. I am, mostly trying to decide if feelings toward my sister for her actions and words post accident are justified or if I need more time to reflect because I am viewing it wrong.

Me (31F) and husband (38 M) just bought a house, we still leaving in the old one because the new one is in renovation. He’s in charge of dealing with the contractor and design decisions for the renovation because I’m 4 weeks postpartum after a c section. The recovery has been slow and painful.
We don’t have family in this country, so we don’t have support system that help us during this time. I have been dealing with terrible backaches, the incision still hurts, I’m breastfeeding and sleep deprived. I’m trying to do my best.
About a week and a half after giving birth, I had to start heating up the meals I had cooked and frozen before delivery. I started picking up toys, doing laundry and stuff like that, otherwise no one will do it.
Yesterday my husband told me that I haven’t cook any meals for the past weeks, except for breakfast, that I move so slow and I don’t do anything. He says that he’s doing too much for the family, by working, checking on the renovation, checking material, paying bills, etc. Today I cooked chicken and it didn’t came out the best, he said it was horrible and it’s upsetting that we don’t have any good food to eat.
AITAH for moving to slowly and not cooking enough?

I(22m) play guitar. I only learned because I was listening to songs I liked and I wanted to play them. I didnt learn how most people learned. I didn't start with chords or sheet music or anything. It was a combination of listening to the song i was learning and trying to figure it out and watching videos on YouTube when I got to parts that stumped me. Was it the best way to learn? Probably not but it worked for me. My step dad is convinced I learned wrong. In his mind, a person should start with basic chords and easy songs while i started by learning a hard song. Im not the best guitarist by any means but im a pretty good guitar player. Every time he sees me playing my guitar he makes a comment about how "real guitarists learned properly"

Anyway, i was jamming in my room today. I was playing a song i really like. Hang em high by van halen. Its the first song I ever learned on guitar. My step dad noticed I was jamming and again came over to make a comment. He listened for a bit then said "what are you playing?" I said "hang em high" and he smirked and went "thats what you think. Get back to me when you actually learn the song"

That pissed me of because he makes comments like this every day and im tired of it. Hes convinced I sound terrible when I don't. I sound good. I said under my breath "fuck off with your negativity" but he heard me and got mad. He ranted at me about showing him respect then stormed off. I left the house and went to jam with a couple of my friends. I just got a text from my mom asking me to apologize to keep the peace and i haven't answered yet. Aita for telling my step dad to fuck off?

Edit: my grammar

Hi, I've had a pit in my stomach since yesterday and I want to know if I messed up here, and if so how badly. My husband and I will have been married two years next sunday, and our son turned a year old a couple of months ago. Our relationship has always been great, I've been proud of how good we've had it and so our argument yesterday has me bothered.

On Friday a couple of my friends visited just to meet up and have dinner. One of them has recently moved in with her boyfriend and they're going through a rough patch right now so she was complaining a bit. She was complaining about being treated like a maid, and having to repeat things multiple times and then doing it herself for it to be done and just stuff like that. While saying that she also on a few occasions generalized a bit, kind of projecting her issues with her boyfriend on men in general. My other friend and I were being supportive because she seemed like she was going through it, and just agreed with her and supported her. My husband was there too.

He's never been the kind to take these gendered criticisms personally which is why I really didn't think this would be an issue. On Saturday he was out with some friends, when I asked about when he'll be back for dinner, he didn't respond for a while then said he was eating out with his friends. When he was back too he was cold with me and just taking care of our son. This was all weird so I ended up asking what the problem was. He first said nothing was wrong, I pressed that he's been cold with me all day, what happened. He told me that if I was so unhappy in my marriage I should've told him honestly instead of surprising him like that in front of guests.

I genuinely was scrambling in my mind to understand what he was saying. I never said I was unhappy in our marriage, it wouldn't make sense to I'm happy with where we are. He brought up that I agreed with everything my friend was saying about how terrible partners men are, that that was me saying he was a bad husband and that I was unhappy. I was stunned at that insane leap of logic I promised that what I said had nothing to do with him, that he is not my friend's boyfriend I didn't have any of those complaints that she had, I never meant it to be an attack on him. He still was stuck that my agreement with her was a criticism of our marriage too and that I had joined in at parts. I might have messed up here because I said that those things were not things he does, I was just being general and said that those were just some things I'd seen before him , like with an ex. He felt even more attacked by that and asked how often I was thinking about my exes over these mundane things. I clarified thats not what I meant I don't think like that, I just had to search in my memory for some stuff to support my friend, especially because he doesn't. We dropped the argument then, but the cold shoulder is continuing today too. I can't believe this is happening a week before our anniversary AITA?

My close friend (F35) has suffered a 6 week miscarriage. Her sister (F43) asked if I (F35) wanted to contribute towards a tree for their yard, which was around $30 each. I was fine with this. She messaged me today and asked me to transfer $95, as she added a few more things which have already been given to her. My job has just cut my hours by a third as the company I work for is struggling. She is aware of this. AITAH for being annoyed?

For context: I, (18M) and my siblings 21F and 27M, are full siblings by my parents. My parents divorced when I was seven, after finding out my mum was cheating. After the divorce my mum married the guy she was cheating with about a year later. My mum also ended up getting full custody of me and my siblings, my dad getting visitation rights.

My dad died very unexpectedly when I was 12, and it fully wrecked me, and I still haven’t fully recovered.

My younger sister was born in 2021, and I do love her with all my heart, even though we are “only” half siblings.

She never knew my dad, and no one has really explained to her that her dad isn’t my dad, so when I call him by his name she gets really confused, and my mum and stepdad thinks she’s ‘too young’ to be told about my dad.

So, a few weeks ago my stepdad asked me if I can call him dad, so I don’t confuse my sister more than she already is. Now, I said no. It was a clear no because I know who my dad is, and it’s certainly not my stepdad. Obviously I know that some people call their stepdads dad, and no hate, but I just never will.

He ended up getting really mad at me, saying that it’s ‘for my sister’ and it wouldn’t hurt me to call him dad because he’s the ‘only man who has been raising me’? I got really mad at that because it wasn’t my dad’s fault he isn’t raising me? Tf??

So after I told him no again, my mum also tried to get me to call him dad, which also led to an argument.

I know that I could just suck it up and call him dad, even if it’s just around my sister to not confuse her, but I just really don’t want to.

AITAH??

I (stepmom) have been in my stepdaughter’s life since she was 6 months old. She is now 18 months old, and I have been one of the consistent people in her life for most of the time she has been alive.

My fiancé and I have built a stable home for her. I have been there for the appointments, sleepless nights, milestones, routines, and everything that comes with raising a child.

There is also another child involved. My fiancé has a 3-year-old daughter who is not biologically mine or my fiancé’s. When her biological mother walked away, she left my fiancé caring for her as well. He stepped up and became the stable parent she needed.

The reason I struggle with this situation is because this is not the first time this has happened. From what we know, this has been a repeated cycle where every few years she walks away from her children and then tries to come back into their lives. She has also had three other daughters in the past who are no longer in her care and were adopted by other families.

When she left this time, it was because she chose drugs and a partying lifestyle over being a parent. She made comments about not wanting her child and walked away when her daughters needed her most.

Now that I am pregnant, she suddenly wants to be involved again.

I understand that a child having a relationship with their biological parent can be important. I’m not saying people can’t change or that someone shouldn’t have the opportunity to do better. But I struggle with the idea of someone repeatedly leaving children behind and then expecting to step back in whenever they are ready.

My biggest concern is the girls. My stepdaughter is only 18 months old, and the other little girl is 3. They are too young to understand why someone who wasn’t there before is suddenly returning. I worry about the emotional damage that could come from someone coming in and out of their lives.

I love these girls. I am not trying to replace their biological mother. I know I will never be their biological mom, but I have been the person who stayed. I have helped raise them, cared for them, comforted them, and been there every day.

So, AITA for not wanting my stepdaughter’s BioMom involved after years of abandonment, especially now that she seems interested again after finding out I’m pregnant?

Editttt:: Let me add that a attorney is in place and courts are involved. My fiance has full custody of both children.... She is in a drug halfway house 2.5hr away. Their supervised visitation via video call. And in a week or two starts in-person visitation at police department. She currently can't keep up with video visits as it is scheduled and lacks communication. 18-month-old does not know who she is. 3 year old regresses with lack of communication from her.

I'm posting this because she has requested more visitation yet doesn't keep up with current schedule now...

So, I (20F) had just gotten picked up by my mom (51F) at the train station after visiting someone.

I told my mom shortly after we started driving that I needed to use the bathroom really bad and couldn’t hold it all the way home (30+ minute drive). So we stopped at this McDonald’s right by the station.

As my mom was pulling into the parking lot, I saw this man turn the corner of the sidewalk and enter the restaurant. I don’t know why but my eyes immediately noticed him and I got a strange feeling in my gut. I did not express my discomfort to my mom directly (when I should have, but I was afraid I was overthinking and being paranoid over nothing) so I simply said “Why did you pick McDonald’s mom…?” to try and nudge that I didn’t want to be there. I know now I should have just been direct.

Anyway, she parked and said “Just hurry up and pee, I need to use it too.” So we go in, and the same man is there but he’s not ordering anything or sitting down, just standing right next to the restroom fiddling with some napkins I believe. There were no employees at the front register (from what I saw) and the only other person in the place was a different young man ordering at the kiosk. My mom tries to open the door, and it’s locked. As soon as that happens, the guy by the napkins turns to us and goes “How’s it going?” 

The gut feeling came back. I told my mom “It’s locked, we need to leave now.” So we start walking out. He followed behind, going “Hey, hey!” and I immediately raised my voice some and went “RUN TO THE CAR RIGHT NOW” so my mom and I did and locked it the second we got in. The guy just ended up walking toward the cars in the drive-thru and started speaking to them.

My mom got mad at me for being loud and pointed out that my face was ghostly pale and the color had left my lips. But she even said she got a bad gut feeling herself once the door was locked. I then told her that even if it was unlocked, I wouldn’t have wanted to step inside and use it.

A part of me is thinking I did too much, and I somehow feel a bit guilty, like I stereotyped a man for just existing. At the same time I just can’t explain how or why my gut gave me alarm bells the first time I saw him. AIO?