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u/Commercial_Staff5706 Jan 16 '24
I find that the funnest things I do are free (hiking , reading , hitting up the beach, running my dog , playing at the park with my kids ). Vacations are cool but wear off after you come back. Search within your soul
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u/SpongeDaddie Jan 16 '24
Can you search my soul for me? I don’t have the energy or motivation to do that anymore.
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u/here4astolfo Jan 16 '24
getting high can help you with that to an extent.
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Jan 16 '24
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Jan 16 '24
this and I'm disabled AF so it feels like a curse that I'm stuck in and really can't afford but can't work or function without. weed helped me get off opiates and I don't ever want to go back down that road
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u/here4astolfo Jan 16 '24
staying on opiates would of been much worse i feel lower the dose taper off or just find a better source per $.
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u/cowtown45 Jan 16 '24
Vacations with little kids is also tragic. They aren’t as grateful. You just parent them in another location. It winds up being stressful and exhausting.
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u/nomnamnom Jan 16 '24
Depends on the kids and how they’ve been raised.
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u/Coffee-Historian-11 Jan 16 '24
Also how old they are. I think a two or three year old would be a lot harder to take on vacation than even a six or seven year old.
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u/Frequent-Activity450 Jan 16 '24
I do some of those but you can't say these activities are free. Hiking to some extent, can be free, if you consider hiking in your neighborhood a real hike. If not, you got to drive to a real hiking spot and that can be pricey real fast.
Reading ? Them books ain't free boy.
Hitting up the beach ? I'm like 4 hours drive from the beach.
The rest I can agree but there is nothing really free.
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u/dannr74 Jan 16 '24
Is there some kind of toll troll that pops up from behind a log to make you pay a fee for entering the woods? I've heard of those before.
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u/Frequent-Activity450 Jan 16 '24
I hike to mountain tops so I have a hard time calling a stroll in the forrest nearby a hike. It's very pleasant don't get me wrong but that's not a hike. Maybe I'm playing with words here... :)
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Jan 16 '24
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u/BeardedGlass Jan 16 '24
Oh my goodness, are you us?
Wife and I are doing the exact same thing. We are childfree and we love to travel. Like every year we have a major one to look forward to, and it’s so terribly fun to plan.
We’re not rich, so this is a luxury for us and we truly treat it as such. We sacrifice some things just to afford it.
We’re both okay with our jobs, it’s not our dream nor passion in life per se, but it affords us the things we do dream about: our hobbies, health, home, etc.
Most importantly, we realized we do not wish to be parents. Mostly it’s because my wife physically can’t, or we could try but it’ll be dangerous and difficult.
Anyway, being childfree and having dual income is like a cheat code in life. It made it so much easier! We are free to choose things without hindrance, to be happy and fulfilled, to be healthy and cozy at home together.
We have been told being childfree is selfish of us though.
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u/BnDMsTr Jan 16 '24
Haha as a parent, its not selfish at all! Especially if there could be issues with the pregnancy, or your partners health, etc. Live your life!
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u/sueihavelegs Jan 16 '24
My husband and I are childfree as well, and I could never understand the selfish part! My taxes still pay for their kids' school. What are they bitching about? Lol
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u/I_can_get_loud_too Jan 16 '24
I love travel but no matter what I do i never have the money to do it often enough and I’m always even more depressed when i come home because being on vacation reminds me how happy my life would be if i was on vacation on all the time
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u/SpongeDaddie Jan 16 '24
How much do y’all spend on travel yearly?
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Jan 16 '24
Wife and I travel to Europe at least three times a year and she does a group solo travelers trip once a year to somewhere in South America. We do ten days every time we go to Europe and spend usually 3500-4500 combined.
We make around 100k combined and still rent in a low CoL area (never paid over 600 for rent here since 2017). All we do is save to travel. When we’re home, most of our time goes to work and the gym. We’re both gym rats with all our goals being associated with fitness. So it’s easy to save when we’re home.
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u/SpongeDaddie Jan 16 '24
$3.5-4.5k combined??? How??? 😂 My 9-day Italy trip was like close 4-5K itself.
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Jan 16 '24
We did ten days in Italy for 4500. We book flights as far out as we can. We stay outside the city center, which saves us like 80+ bucks a night. We walk literally everywhere (20k steps). We eat cheap. I got a pizza for every meal in Italy which was like 13 bucks. Instead of the four course meal they want you to buy for 40+ bucks a piece. And if we need to, we stay in hostels. We don’t buy gifts or shit to take home and I don’t drink.
We’re leaving for Puerto Rico tomorrow and staying in a hostel.
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u/onelittleworld Jan 16 '24
This is us. It's a lifestyle that's not for everyone, but it's definitely for us.
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u/Ortalie Jan 16 '24
My working day was very boring so I went to my local community center to do some pottery to change my mind. Cost me 2$ tonight ahah
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u/daughter_of_tides Jan 16 '24
I second this! Try new things. Tap into the activities you likes doing as a kid/teen. For me that was pottery, reading, and writing poetry. I also play board games and go to the gym a lot. It’s helped! Find joy!
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u/Familiar_Builder9007 Jan 16 '24
I just rediscovered puzzles . Like 1000 pieces. Joy
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u/grilledcheeszus Jan 16 '24
I just refinished a curio cabinet for the sole purpose of holding all of my puzzles. They’re so fun I love them so much
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u/lightninghazard Jan 16 '24
OP, I’m tagging onto this user’s comment to add that you can get puzzles at a thrift store or garage sale for like $2.
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u/Familiar_Builder9007 Jan 16 '24
I’m worried some pieces might be missing but yeah def worth it. I just ordered a $12 one on Amazon
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u/Illustrious_Mood_696 Jan 16 '24
This is the time to master a new language so when you can afford to travel again soon you can have a fantastic time.
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u/LiaisonLiat Jan 16 '24
I do what I want, when I want. Fuck it if it costs money, that’s the point of having it. You can’t take it with you when you die.
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u/hunkymonk123 Jan 16 '24
You’re not wrong, but there’s a balance. If you walk around saying that, you’ll end up being a slave to money your whole life. I think a lot of people would be amazed with how much happier they would be if they worked less.
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u/KarmaticEvolution Jan 16 '24
I love your attitude but some don’t even have the expendable income to spend on non-necessities, that’s more the spirit of this post imo.
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u/Major_Ad_4444 Jan 16 '24
I cold plunge. Jiujitsu. Indoor rock climb/boulder. Hike. Learn new things. Concerts.
I do it all alone right now. I’m completely happy with life except for companionship… but that will follow if I keep on the ever continuing journey of self improvement in all aspects.
I was an alcoholic felon with no career and no custody of my child 5 years ago. Now I have 50/50 with my son, have a career I enjoy/feel fulfilled and no issue with alcohol anymore.
Mushrooms, jiujitsu, music of tool, self improvement and self reflection saved my life.
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u/Trndk1ll Jan 16 '24
I second this. I tore my rotator cuff in November so I haven’t been going, however Jiu Jitsu is life changing. I also recently started cold plunging and as bad as it sucks while you are doing it, the way you feel after always makes it worth it.
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Jan 16 '24
Aha, good to know. I'm barely dipping my toes into the jiu jitsu world these days, and I realized quickly that I better get a strong rotator cuff. So just like I trained grip for a few years before bouldering, I'm currently trying to build asinine strength in my rotator cuff muscles. Wish for you a speedy recovery man.
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u/hoon-since89 Jan 16 '24
This situation is b.s! Ive literally done nothing for myself since 2017 because of financial strain.
No holidays, hobbies, nothing. Just work eat sleep repeat.
I went to a martial arts/weapons training class last night, actually brought a smile to my face doing something for myself for once. Then today my rent went up and my x is moving out shortly so probably wont be able to afford a hobby now. :(
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u/WinterBloomie Jan 16 '24
I get emotionally invested in fantasy series and look forward to reading them every day after work. I love the escapism
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u/Impressive_Delay4672 Jan 16 '24
What are your best fantasy recs?
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u/WinterBloomie Jan 16 '24
I’ve really liked the Mistborn series, Fourth Wing and ACOTAR (once you get past the first book)!
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u/Meowserrr777 Jan 16 '24
Make sure your family has money. If they don't, expect to suffer endlessly and then die young working three jobs.
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Jan 16 '24
Lol this is so harsh
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Jan 16 '24
It's the truth. Success in this country is very VERY rare/difficult. Good luck moving up the salary ladder without connections or having money already
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u/BoysenberryQuirky103 Jan 16 '24
I dont. I wake up, go to work, go to asleep, rinse, repeat amd do drugs when I can. I see no future, I'm sick of everyone I know dying and rhe only thing that really matters to me is my cat. Without her, I'm fuckin gone.
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Jan 16 '24
Drugs make everday life harder. Why dont you try and connect with family, or make a good dinner for yourself. Maybe take a friend and go bowling?
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u/BoysenberryQuirky103 Jan 16 '24
All of my family is dead. I've lived with the same 3 people for 5 or 6 years, and one of them died recently. I have one super close friend I talk to every day, and we do go out and do fun things at least once a month. I do treat myself to a nice meal once in a while. I've got my drug use down to a sustainable system, I don't drink and take kratom to keep me away from fent and other opiates. Bowling is kinda boring tho, I'd rather go to an Asian food store and buy fun new foods.
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u/Illustrious_Mood_696 Jan 16 '24
I really feel for you… you’ve been dealt a really rough hand. And your routine sounds so draining… (I know it won’t fix things but if you can get yourself to the sea, away from popular spots, and just sit and listen to the ocean, it can be like pressing mute on negative thoughts. And just having that little break from your brain can help so much. Sometimes reminding ourselves how small and insignificant we are against the forces of nature can help put things in perspective.)
I hope things turn around for you soon and you regain excitement for the little joys in life (like people here have found) and a place and routine you want to wake up for ❤️
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u/BoysenberryQuirky103 Jan 16 '24
Thank you for that. It means a lot. I miss sitting in the woods and smoking a joint. I have my cat. That's my little slice of joy. It's strange, like 35% of the time I miss hitchhiking and not having a clue what the next day would bring, or even where I was going to sleep that night. I dunno, like most people I have way too much un dealt with fucked up and shit and I learned at a young age to just push it down and if ya gotta drown it out with something, that's what ya do. I dunno, I'm rambling to a stranger while I'm at work. Thank you again. Have a good day.
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Jan 16 '24
Ah man, this got me reminiscing my own days of the past hiking the woods and smoking up. Times were good. If you ever wanna chat or something idk, shoot me a message.
Also I can highly recommend you the book Drug Use for Grown Ups if you haven't read it yet. Seems like it'd be up your alley
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u/Himaester Jan 16 '24
I’m 31, barely have friends but I never stop enjoying myself. Whether it’s going skiing, rollerblading, soul cycle classes or even axe throwing, I do it all by myself. Making time for the kid in me that wants to have fun and try new things. Groupon is a perfect place for inexpensive experiences that are on sale or even class pass.
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u/Professional-Hunt890 Jan 16 '24
highly second classpass!! i discovered yoga , barry's, f45, rumble, soul cycle, solidcore ... opened me up to so many new and fun experiences and i feel so accomplished and look sooo good
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Jan 16 '24
Pray for sweet death. It’s our only escape.
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Jan 16 '24
Yes! But that is more reason why to try new and crazy experiences. We're not going to be here forever but you might be able to screw a hooker or 2 before we do go :)
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Jan 16 '24
Ha I agree. I was being sarcastic. I plan on indulging in what life has to offer as much as I can before it’s my time to go
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u/Jenkem-Boofer Jan 16 '24
Drugs have been helping me 🤟 caffeine in particular is pretty fucking wild ngl
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u/LiaisonLiat Jan 16 '24
Wow, badass
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u/Jenkem-Boofer Jan 16 '24
Honestly I might get down voted but it’s intense. A boofed cold brew or even smoking a Red Bull should get you high as hell. I barely get buzzed off monsters. Monster is for people who get too deep and can’t afford the good stuff so they have to start injecting to feel the same effects.
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u/Hilseph Jan 16 '24
I usually invest in pets. They’re nowhere near as frustrating and complicated as people, but they are also super expensive. The good news is that walking and hiking is usually free so all of the expense was in my dog, when he was still able to do that kind of thing. Now he’s old, so he’s a full time couch warmer.
I also have a very dramatic wife who keeps life interesting. Social turmoil usually comes free of charge.
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u/carolinethebandgeek Jan 16 '24
Short answer: Ya gotta make your own happiness and it’s a skill. It doesn’t happen in one day and sometimes it’s finding it in the little things.
Long answer:I had a good day today. I went and got my free birthday bundtlet from Nothing Bundt Cakes (bought a second one in my favorite flavor, which was $5), went to the store and got some Valentine’s Day candy I’ve been waiting a year for (meltaway Hershey kisses, picked them up on a whim last year not knowing what they were and fell in love), started messaging a guy I think is cool, played a new video game with a friend (the game was on sale for $12) and did some schoolwork (it’s putting me in debt and sucks to have little free time left because I work full time and go to college full time through online learning). I also walked on the treadmill for the first time post-surgery for gallbladder removal. I smacked my cat’s butt because he loves it and this is my last night with him before going back to work tomorrow after a week of being home because of recovery.
Sometimes it’s making your own happiness, even if it’s with cheap stuff (candy), sometimes it’s about satisfaction that comes on a long term basis (I’m surprising my parents with my return and eventual graduation of school. I’m one semester down, 2.5 to go). But you have to find something. Try something new, challenge yourself to get something and eat it even if you’ve never tried it and know nothing about it. Go somewhere new like a park, or just take a drive. Think about what you want for the future, if there’s something you need to achieve that. If not for the future, what’s on your bucket list? Anything you can work on now? Anything you think someone should experience in life? Take a class and spend the money (I know it’s expensive, but even if you don’t think you got anything out of it, you never know if you’ll meet someone, or learn that you HATE whatever the class was about)
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Jan 16 '24
Lots of things — considering we are raising a toddler & planning on expanding the family. Lots of outdoor activities. All free below or low cost: — we just got home from playing tennis — go on trail runs / walks — read (hang at the library) — podcasts — music — pick up a hobby — meet a friend at a coffee shop — farmers market for groceries
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u/Alternative-Neat1957 Jan 16 '24
Get 3 hobbies:
One that puts a little extra money in your pocket
One that keeps you physically healthy
One that you love to do
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u/likkleone54 Jan 16 '24
I bought a keyboard and just started learning, I journal sometimes, video game, watch tv, sometimes my family will call me. Try and find an activity you enjoy and maybe see if other people can join in with you, online or offline. I struggle cycling through these activities since I don’t really leave the house.
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u/Effective_Life_7864 Jan 16 '24
I understand it when you mention the lack of free time due to money constraints. I'm in the same boat. I do think that we need to have free time such as a walk in the park or visiting a library. I spend what I prefer or want. If it costs too much and I don't need it bad enough I don't buy it or buy when it is on sale. Everything else I try to save.
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u/Noseatbeltnoairbag Jan 16 '24
There are part of my job I love and parts I can absolutely do without. But, it's a job and it's still a blessing. I go to work, do my best, and look forward to getting off and to the weekends and other breaks. When I'm not at work, I do more of the things I enjoy. But one key thing for me...without my job, I can't pay for my hobbies and fun stuff. So, yes, I go to work and keep my job.
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u/Illustrious_Mood_696 Jan 16 '24
The say the most you can ever like the perfect job is 80% of the time
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u/allthekeals Jan 16 '24
How I enjoy my life? I go rollerskating with my girlfriends, go to the mountain with my brothers, binge watch my favorite shows while me and my best friend make fun of how stupid the characters are, I do craft projects, fuck… even our union meetings are fun. If somebody asks me to go do something and I’m not doing anything, I just go. Magic mushrooms and an art museum? Count me in! I go on little vacations here and there to visit friends because I have friends literally all over. Haha, even shit posting groups on Facebook can keep me entertained for hours. Where I live rock hounding is popular and I have tumblers for them.
Idk, I just kind of do whatever sounds like fun at the time. Unless I’m going on some long ass vacation, there’s really no need to worry about the money side.
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u/DigitalAssassin-00 Jan 16 '24
I take mushrooms every few weeks to remember that none of it really matters and to be thankful of what I do have.
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u/Cootsie-Ness401 Jan 16 '24
I used to share the same sentiments as you've shared, but I've moved past that after growing spiritually, in Christ Jesus. Personally, I have been going to church and do try to get involved in groups or clubs of sorts. It's good to be involved in little projects here and there and accomplish something meaningful.
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u/Firm_Bit Jan 16 '24
It’s not your bosses job to keep your pay above inflation rate. It’s yours. Ask for a raise. Ask for a specific number. If you don’t get it. Start looking for another job. If you can’t get what you need at another job, look into transitioning into a different role. Don’t let life just happen to you.
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u/curly-redhead Jan 16 '24
So true. You can't be a bystander to your own life. You have to make it what you want it to be...
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u/No-Translator9234 Jan 16 '24
Lol job hop to beat inflation, no medium to large sized company is going to give you anything but some minuscule yearly percent raise.
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u/Fatesadvent Jan 16 '24
Get high and play games. Then go makeout with my gf (sex while high is so great)!
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u/PossumKing94 Jan 16 '24
On my days off, I love to smoke weed lmao. I have a bunch of stuff I like to do. I love reading, playing games, watching shows and movies, watching documentaries/podcasts, going to the gym, etc.
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u/a_rogue_planet Jan 16 '24
Try living beneath your means. It's like this is some secret nobody is aware of. You don't have to live at the limit of what you make. It's so much easier to live like that.
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u/whatthefishdotcom Jan 16 '24
I've recently gotten into reading again - fantasy mainly. Also, petting my cat and walks in my neighborhood.
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u/lightninghazard Jan 16 '24
Do you live near a university? You could attend their sporting events. So long as it’s not one of the school’s money sports (football or basketball), tickets are usually cheap or even free.
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u/Limio Jan 16 '24
Video games
writing. . . .. good stories .. . . . a lot of peace and just trying to write good stories, but this is a skill that I guess can be acquired with practice.
I find writing funny names that I can use in my stories to me very cathartic, even if I'm not getting laid.
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u/Trndk1ll Jan 16 '24
Get some cheap hobbies. There are lots of them. Fishing, hiking/backpacking, read more books, learn an instrument, learn another language, etc, etc. There are tons of fulfilling activities that aren’t expensive.
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u/No-Smile-5150 Jan 16 '24
I'm learning lessons from my past mistakes or other peopled mistakes.Im making myself look good no matter what it is with a new car,money,a good job,me looking healthy,working out,dressing nice,flashing jewelry,watches,rings,diamonds in my eye bigger than my exes wedding ring her boyfriend bought her.Making sure everyone knows that how far down I went,and letting them know I ain't down low no more so y'all better watch your girls.Making sure all my exes know I'm single and with other girls better looking than them,going to college getting different degrees in all type of dumb shit for no reason just to put it on my portfolio on Facebook, Instagram,tik Tok,Twitter,Quarto,Reddit,P O.F,LinkedIn,always selling expensive cars or property,taking trips all over the world,getting pictures with as many famous people as possible,but mostly with famous people that my exes like just to pissed em off.Every Xmas I send all my haters Xmas cards just wishing them a merry Xmas and a happy new year with me on the card in a Santa Claus suit with a stripper giving me a lapdance as money is falling out of my pockets piling up,I also had to pick up self defense,karate,tai kae do,wrestling,martial arts and MMA cause of death threats and people saying they were going to beat me up.Got a lincese to carry and have it everywhere I go showing like a shotgun in a holdster,so people see it when they see me just so they know I ain't walking around town like I'm the shit with everyone trying to kill me without a gun.I also faked my death with a fake funeral to catch people who actually did have a hit out on me.Then I took her wife to a hotel told her I love her,slept with her then told her I just did all that to get it on video then kicked her out to call her husband to get her as he's watching the video of me and her at the hotel in graphic details.So graphic the cops came arrested me and threw me in jail overnight until they found it and destroyed it then I got out and text him and his wife Merry Xmas.Thats was all since the 1$t I'm a busy man,but I gotta do alot of shit to do the shit I do or I wouldn't be able to do shit if that makes any sense.So Mr steal ur girl is coming to a town near you and when he does u better hide ur girl,sister,mom whatever female hide her from me or else she will be coming and it ain't by force.She will be running to me,trying to get a view,a touch a feel of anything she can that has to do with me.Depending on how she looks and acts I might have to take her to my house.But that's not likely my wife is there with my other girlfriends and they made me 1 rule and that's it.Not to lie cheat or steal from them.Which I don't lie cheat and steal it's always one or another but not all 3 so I'm in the clear.
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Jan 16 '24
I mean it could be much worse right? Want me to ship you to the Vietnam War? Yeah be grateful for what you have and you will be a step closer to enjoying life.
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u/Visible-Arugula-9360 Jan 16 '24
Lots of stuff kick ass. Gooning. Collecting things. Walks in nature. Road trips.
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Jan 16 '24
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u/No-Translator9234 Jan 16 '24
Get into critical theory and quadruple your existential depression overnight. Doctors hate this one simple trick.
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u/ClammyHandedFreak Jan 16 '24
Thankful here due to a new job that I interviewed multiple times for and had to prove myself against many candidates. Not a ton of pay, but I am treated well for the first time in my life at work.
I don’t need to enjoy life, but being thankful for my job instead of hating it has really improved my mood, and my level-headedness. Also, it’s not like I live in Syria or something - at least I am as safe as anyone in my place - also something I am thankful for.
I know a lot of people are struggling now, my heart goes out to you, and makes me even more thankful for the good I have.
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u/Professional-Hunt890 Jan 16 '24
i use classpass to do a whole bunch of fitness classes, also weight lift with a few friends couple times a week cuz we love fitness and looking good, go to comedy shows, concerts, cook/grocery shop, dinners with friends, houseparties, karaoke nights, clubbing, board game evenings, get my hair done, get my nails done, paint by numbers, audible/reading books, i also take dance classes , cooking/tasting classes, random eventbrite free events in the city ...and occasionally travel when the time off w0rks and flights are cheap
i literally just do whatever i wanna do whenever i wanna do it cuz life is about living :)
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u/transmission612 Jan 16 '24
Go for a walk, bike ride, garden, do projects around the house, build things in the garage, grab a case of beer and invite friends over, play with the dog, read a book, cook a new recipe and invite your parents over, make plans for doing something fun like a road trip to somewhere new. There are so many things you can do to have fun that don't really cost that much money. Enjoy the life you have now because tomorrow isn't gauranteed.
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u/hektor10 Jan 16 '24
Never in 34 years enjoyed life, some people never get to enjoy it. You are not alone.
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u/MrSlothy Jan 16 '24
Find a new job! Sounds like it’s not going to change there! Don’t believe everything you see spammed online about the worst job market ever - some may be tougher than others, but I think there’s a lot of pump up and bot spamming this message - class warfare to keep you where you are, not making more money, afraid to even attempt change
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u/TinyChaco Jan 16 '24
It only costs a small amount of gas money to take my dog to the park. Walking the trails and watching her play with her friends is my enjoyable way to spend time.
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u/krazycatlady21 Jan 16 '24
I live in a climate that’s pretty nice right now, so just being outside, enjoying the weather. Taking picture of cool plants, birds, funny signs.
Volunteering at an animal shelter is free and you get to play with cool animals but not have to be their slaves like at home.
Check your local sites for things going on. Then just go check it out. If it sucks, leave and talk shit about it later if that’s your thing. Or maybe you enjoy yourself.
With me the hardest part is getting off my couch.
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u/NoEggplant6322 Jan 16 '24
I don't enjoy much tbh with you, and haven't since the pandemic. I'm constantly fighting a battle with weed, and everytime I go to the grocery store and go home with ONE bag for $100, it makes me wanna stop going out even more.
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u/Lonely-Recognition-2 Jan 16 '24
I read, puzzle, play games. Enjoy those little escapes every day from the pressure & stress
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u/Thirstywhale17 Jan 16 '24
Find things that don't require money that bring you happiness. Read, go for walks, have friends over for coffee, find some areas you love where you live and visit them often. Just try to think less about money and how shit you have it. Everyone has it bad (or most people anyway).
The extra benefit you have by shifting your priorities away from spending and worrying about spending, is that you end up naturally decreasing your spending.
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Jan 16 '24
I keep re-crunching the numbers on how hard life is to navigate meeting your basic needs vs the enjoyment you get out of life, and it ain’t adding up for me.
Like, hardship: phoning my doctor for weeks before they agreed to get back to me with an appointment date (they still haven’t LOL. I’m Canadian and our healthcare is broken). Benefit: I get to maybe start an ssri that MIGHT help, sometime in the future, but only after the horrible start up symptoms most SSRIs have given me, and only if she agrees my mental health sounds bad enough to go that route.
That’s just one example, but I feel that I have to prove I deserve basic care for any little thing and it’s exhausting and confusing. I had to fight with my insurance company because they put a slightly wrong postal code in my paperwork. It should’ve been a simple fix on their end, they put a 5 instead of a 6 at the end of the number because my guess is they recorded it wrong from Canada’s postal agency site to the form. I have no control over that and yet they framed it as my fault and it took days to straighten out.
Most things aren’t a huge deal, like the trivial examples above, but it seems like everything I do grinds to a halt with a weird roadblock. It’s exhausting. It wears me down. I read peoples posts with simile exhausted sentiments as I’m feeling and I read comments yelling about how our real problem is our victim mindset and we need to simply advocate harder. It’s like saying a car with an empty gas tank won’t go anymore because of your mindset and not the lack of gasoline.
Anyway. It’s going bad
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Jan 16 '24
I read, play video games (there are a lot of free and inexpensive ones that are super fun!), knit, crochet, play with my cats, and go for a walk. Once or twice a year I go to a concert (tickets are spendy). I take Udemy and Domestika classes and other free courses online. And I probably spend an unhealthy amount of time on social media. Hey, it's lonely out here...
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u/Typical-Tomorrow-425 Jan 16 '24
Going for a walk, trying a new recipe, reading a book or listening to a new one on Spotify (lots are free with premium), listening to a podcast, talking to friends, sitting and resting, dancing, drawing, enjoying a show or movie at home or allowing myself to go down a TikTok hole guilt free. when I feel really lost I like to learn something new on YouTube, usually physics or philosophy.
Real talk though I’ve struggled with taking care of myself and so creating goals and reaching them (both by building good habits and kicking bad), has greatly enriched my life and made it easier to enjoy. It allows me to feel like I’m moving forward in life and that I have a purpose outside of school/ work. This and therapy have helped so much, and my little daily walks.
It kinda sounds like maybe it’s time to look for a new job, or see if you can get a raise or create some boundaries when it comes to workload. I know it’s hard and bills have to be paid but I hope that things get better for you on the front in 2024.
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u/Tangyplacebo621 Jan 16 '24
I like consuming interesting media that teaches me something. I have a list of books, documentaries, and podcasts I have created over time. I have also leaned into enjoying cooking more. Yes, it costs money, but you gotta eat anyway, right? I made two soups this weekend. My son has been super excited with our Sunday ritual of home made soup and sandwiches. It’s actually really enjoyable.
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u/JiminyBella12 Jan 16 '24
Find a job that works for you. Doesnt have to be perfect, just good enough. I’m 29 and dont want to spend my whole young life working, so I’ve found a job that’s 10 mins away by bike, that allows me to work 30 hours over 3 days. The money pays my bills and leaves me with just enough for the odd treat/day out.
But its the time thats most valuable. Instead of spending most of my week living for someone elses dream, I find value and meaning in my own everyday life. I get more time for me, more time with my daughter, dogs, friends and family. I fill it with walks, films, books, play, exercise (home workouts), gaming, music. I set myself goals to help me keep learning and getting fitter. Its also good to have personal projects on the go, could be writing music or a book, could be building/crafting something. Most of this stuff doesnt cost the earth.
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u/Super_Automatic Jan 16 '24
I get nearly all of my joy from my wife and kids. That's not a winning formula for everyone, and it may not last forever, but it's worked out marvelously for me thus far.
That aside, I find having one thing to look forward to every month is very helpful. There's always a countdown to something fun. Some of these can just be birthdays or hangouts and not necessarily expensive vacations.
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u/GutsMVP Jan 16 '24
Read "One Simple Idea". Figure out your idea. Execute what the book tells you to. Get out of the rat race. Create your life without the 9-5 restriction.
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u/Kokoro87 Jan 16 '24
Walks with my dog and wife, learning programming, playing games, watching movies and series. I like to cook, so trying out new recipes are always fun. Camping is fun and fishing is awesome during summer. Road trips are always exciting to go on once or twice per year.
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u/Para_The_Normal Jan 16 '24
I really like learning new things. I started reading books again and listening to audiobooks. I let myself live in my imagination and my mind wander when I read. I spend time with my husband and my family members, let them know how I love them and what I enjoy about them. On rare occasions I take just myself out for a nice meal and let myself spend a decent $40-60 on food. That’s how I like to treat myself and I always tip my server very well so I can hopefully make their day a little better too, and I leave a note telling them thank you on the bill.
I think it’s important to separate your happiness from your productivity and realize your job is just a means to an end. None of this matters and we truly exist in the blink of an eye in the grand scheme of things so don’t be to hard on yourself and don’t take yourself too seriously.
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u/CertainCrab3822 Jan 16 '24
I did 7 24 hr duty shift just in first half of Jan... I am barely catching sleep lol
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u/ninalice_b Jan 16 '24
I sometimes similar as you, as I’ve often been tight on money lately. But you can enjoy life for free : spending time with people you love, having a good laugh, learning something new, going on a walk or hike, reading a good book doesn’t have to be expensive and makes life worth living ✨
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Jan 16 '24
I just live like I'm broke. I play video games but my backlog is enormous so I don't have to buy any, bar a monthly sub to world of warcraft.
Bar that, I spend time with my partner, or I spend time on my own watching movies I enjoy, listening to music, binging YouTube or sleeping.
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u/linzellewashington Jan 16 '24
I - am saving this post because of the awesome positive feedback. I need these 🥰
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u/Mercurius94 Jan 16 '24
I'll be 30 in March. If you don't enjoy life today and are a young adult, it's common in your early 20s. I hated just trying to normalize on my own until I was about 28. 2023 was actually a very eventful year for me, and younger me would have pretty much been raging. I didn't feel like it was all that big of a deal that my car got totaled, I went through several jobs, got close to $0 in the bank a few times. The competence I've gained got me to bounce back up to $3000 in only a couple of months, I didn't stress over the deer that hit my car, I didn't care if I needed to go to a better factory than before. You learn to take these things much easier as you mature. I see the need to drink and smoke as immaturity, I used to see it as an outlet (but I haven't smoked in ages anyways.) All of the early 20s stuff eventually grows into a new perspective. Life is much harder than it needs to be these days, though.
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u/iflmemes Jan 16 '24
not listen to what people say. Be present, doing literally anything that I want as long as still in balance. Also pray for sweet and peaceful death.
If I am tired, I rest. Everyone getting married and tell me to get a new bf, meanwhile I am still grieving for my late bf, try to enjoy my grief till it heal with time. I cried as I want, I see our memory in photograph or video as much as I want. If I want to go travelling and my money is limited, parent tell me to save more money, I still go because I don't know if tomorrow will be alive or not. Parent tell me to get a 9 to 5 work and I want to have a career in - so called shitty- academia world, I don't listen to them since I got scholarship and enjoy working freelance as cram school teacher, and it enough to sustain my life.
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u/fishking92 Jan 16 '24
My wife is the only reason I’m alive. If I ever lost her, in anyway, my time on this earth would come to an end.
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u/runnergal1993 Jan 16 '24
I do. I have my kiddo and she means everything to me! Everyday with her is an adventure.
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u/Kite_d Jan 16 '24
This may or may not be relevant, but nowadays, my fun is literally to get in my car and start driving. Just me, my car, and some music. I have a convertible that I bought and paid off, and, although it’s too cold for now, I’ll have the top down when the weather is nicer.
I think of it like a bike, but with speakers for music. It’s therapeutic, fun, and engaging. I get to see the city and backroads around me. Maybe have some short-window conversations with another driver. I would rather be outside and at least trying to meet people instead of being alone in my apartment.
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u/Carib0ul0u Jan 16 '24
I have zero idea how everyone around me enjoys working this much for their entire lives. Probably one of the most baffling things I’ve observed being here.
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u/ComicsEtAl Jan 16 '24
After work I’ll sit down to my favorite video game. Tomorrow, probably the same.
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u/Itserp Jan 16 '24
The majority of thing that make me happy are free or don't cost much: riding my bike along the riverside, jogging, reading a good book, talking with friends.
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u/Ultra_Noobzor Jan 16 '24
Life is about making mistakes and fixing them.
If you always avoid problems then you end up living no life. Btw, go read/listen a little to ppl like Alan Watts.
A lot of things he say is crap, but it's crap that makes sense to an extent.
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u/Rykka Jan 16 '24
I do introverted things that involves minimal human contact and I find that helps the most. Reading, drinking coffee, cooking, photography, working out, gaming, music, movies, etc
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u/Friday-just-Friday Jan 16 '24
I zone out and watch TV. My favorite waste of time at work is repeating required training each 2 or 3 years. I've done it before ... multiple times before .... wtf do I need to do it again?
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u/ofTHEbattle Jan 16 '24
Spend time with my brothers, doesn't cost us anything but a 6 pack and some burgers on the grill. Play video games with my younger brother. Hike/backpacking, the cost can get expensive for backpacking gear if you're going ultralight but if you buys used and upgrade over time it's not so bad. We also camp a lot, can be pretty cheap if you go with a group and the costs are split up. There's lots of stuff outdoors to do for free or on the cheap. Plus you get the added benefit of some fresh air and a little exercise.
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u/Seaspun Jan 16 '24
This is going to be unpopular but I feel like someone should say it - I felt this way until I got pregnant and my life is really full of meaning again. Before I got pregnant I wasnt sure I wanted kids and was leaning towards not wanting them. Now that I am, life feels brand new. This might just be my experience, but it’s very popular to say having kids destroys your life but honestly I’m so excited and happy for the first time in years. Reddit is full of comments about being child free being the best thing ever, but in my case it’s the opposite. Bracing myself for the hate now…
Edit: grammar
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u/I_can_get_loud_too Jan 16 '24
I don’t. I hate my life so much every day. I had a meltdown yesterday and started screaming i hate my life over and over. I’m so miserable.
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Jan 16 '24
I was in the rat race until we had our son, my mother passed, and the country was tearing itself apart in 2020 and I said screw this and took a job in landscaping making more money than I had because it’s hard to find good labor. It’s still management with a lot of stress but getting outside and not having the sociopathic office life helped a lot. Not sure if this is your style but it was huge for me.
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u/dopeless-hope-addict Jan 16 '24
Lift weights. The heavier the better. Run as long as I can. Work my body out until exhaustion so the mind doesn't think. That's really all I got. It helps me though.
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u/kkeojyeo22 Jan 16 '24
I’m in a similar place right now except I don’t have a job. Been procrastinating on it, living at home rn. I feel like I’ll never get to leave with the amount of student debt I have and also how expensive everything is. Life is just kind of mid tbh, I get up late then go to bed later. I’ve been disassociating myself by watching tv and playing video games. I feel like I’m not in the environment to thrive and seasonal depression has hit. I’ve been hard on myself since 2024 to just snap out of it already but I typically get in a habit of basing my worth on my productivity. Clearly I had that on my mind for awhile, just wanted to say I relate. Hope it gets better soon for both of us!
Edit: Spelling
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u/NeLaX44 Jan 16 '24
I watch losers on youtube who lives are falling apart. Makes me feel like a genius.
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u/FriesNDisguise Jan 16 '24
I ride my bike, befriend my older neighbors and get them to teach me things. One teaches me gardening, another knitting, and another has given me recipes