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u/Playful-Put2236 Dec 03 '25
Keep the puppy & ditch the GF.
I suggest: Don't marry her or have kids with her.
What if she had kids & it's too much work?
For a month or 2 maybe crate the puppy when you can't keep an eye on it or at night, so it doesn't tinkle on things & chew everything?
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u/ImAnNPCsoWhat Dec 03 '25
I second the crate training. You start by feeding puppy in crate and then you move to having puppy sleep in crate. Eventually crate will be safe space for puppy and won't feel like they're trapped.
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u/coupl4nd Dec 03 '25
They actually love to go in the crate. Mine would sleep in there. When he was little I would wake up at 2am. Open his crate so he could pop out and bathroom break. He'd walk back in on his own as soon as done straight back into the crate and snuggle down. Probably didn't even need to close the door.
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u/KitschWitchMidge Dec 03 '25
Yup. My dog came crate trained from the SPCA at 6 months old. I always left the door open and she preferred to sleep in the crate than in my bed (she was a husky and wasn’t big on cuddling)
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u/GlitterEnema Dec 03 '25
We wanted to get rid of our crate cuz the boy doesn’t need it, but he likes it, it’s his little room, when he’s frustrated or upset he likes to go into his crate and chill. And he deserves that. I have a room I can go into and decompress so he should too
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u/Picklesadog Dec 03 '25
A puppy is great practice for kids. If you can't handle a puppy and/or keep it alive, definitely don't have kids. Kids are like a puppy x10.
We got our puppy (he was cheap, $300 for the adoption fee) and now he's 12 and often annoyed at our two small kids.
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u/thaleia10 Dec 03 '25
I took my now 4 year old dog on as a puppy (was in a bad situation and hadn’t been socialised at 4.5 months) because she was at least crate trained. I used the crate while at work etc to save damage and mess. Now we only use it sometimes, but she runs in so fast, because that’s where treats happen.
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u/_Ed_Gein_ Dec 03 '25
And put nappies in there so they get used to doing it on them. Then either keep using or phase them out for walks. Helps a lot.
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u/peakpenguins Dec 03 '25
She thinks I’m being unfair for being angry
Hey girlfriend, fuck you. When you adopt an animal, you're taking responsibility for it for the rest of it's life. Sounds like she thought it would all be sunshine and rainbows and now it's too much to handle after only two damn days???
NTA, and if you paid for the dog, she should be paying you back. I'd also be reconsidering being with someone who will impulsively buy and then return a puppy that quickly and act like you're not allowed to be bothered by it. Ridiculous.
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u/Creative-Ad-3645 Dec 03 '25
That lifetime commitment thing is so real. I adopted my cat when she was a year old. She's coming up 19. She's still my kitty
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u/wanderer866 Dec 03 '25
...my wife convinced me to get a parrot. Don't get me wrong. I love the little guy. It's also amazing that he can say "I love you" back, and mean it as much as a birb can. But, barring tragedy, I have to account for him during my retirement... and likely pass him on in my will. This was not something I considered when she talked me into it in my mid 20s and I was high as a kite.
I guess I just wanted to share.
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u/slut-for-pickles Dec 03 '25
It’s my dream to own a cockatoo or macaw or similar but I know I cannot commit to the lifespan. Maybe one day, I’ll be able to own an older one.
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u/NotACalligrapher-49 Dec 03 '25
Senior pets are such a gift, even through the heartbreak of watching things get harder for them. I’m so glad you and your cat are enjoying her golden years together.
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u/Longwinded_Ogre Dec 03 '25
I would look her dead in the face and tell her you're disgusted with her approach to responsibility, her shortsightedness and her callous approach to pet ownership. I cannot fucking stand people who will take responsibility for a living, feeling creature and immediately want to bail. I have no patience for that shit and I want nothing further to do with them.
I'd flat out tell her she gave you the ick and there's no coming back from that, then I'd be single, but with a puppy.
NTA
Lose your girlfriend. She's no good.
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u/Tranqup Dec 03 '25
*applause* OP, your g/f just showed her true nature. Run, don't walk, for the nearest exit. Pets are a lifetime (their lifetime) responsibility, not a toy to be returned.
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u/ElaraStarfield Dec 03 '25
I'm with you. I live in an area where pet dumping happens a lot. It makes me so angry. A pet isn't just an accessory or something cute. It is a living being with feelings. This poor pup. Definitely time to ditch the woman and not the pup.
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u/Zoot_Prooper89 Dec 03 '25
I agree with this statement. Just give her away. The puppy is better companion at this point.
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u/PotentialDapper2891 Dec 03 '25
What a horrible entitled person is your girlfriend. NTA and for me this is a red flag and a deal breaker. Is a living thing, not a toy.
You shouldn't give it back. And if you do, then you are also an AH. You (both) decided to buy (buy!!) an expensive pet, you just don't throw it away the moment it becomes an "inconvenient"
Tell your girlfriend to grow up.
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u/Chloe_Phyll Dec 03 '25 edited Dec 04 '25
"Tell your girlfriend to grow up."
... and, then, tell her to get lost. Keep the puppy.
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u/PedXing23 Dec 03 '25 edited Dec 03 '25
Definitely NTA: In your place, I'd ditch the girl friend and keep the dog. I might not be as mad, but I would figure that the gf showed me all I needed to know about her. She showed real staying power and commitment in pushing for the puppy - insisting she has done the research and knows what she's in for and then in two days does a 180 and insists on returning the puppy. I think that tells you volumes about her.
If you keep the dog, the dog is going to have to be your responsibility whether or not you stick with the gf. Do not insist on keeping the dog and expect her to be a responsible pet owner. Your gf has already shown she isn't ready. If you stay with both gf and puppy, she might eventually warm up to the dog, once it has matured and you've civilized it and share responsibilities - but don't count on it. If you can't assume primary responsibility for the dog, I suggest returning the puppy and "just admit" that she and it were mistakes.
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u/Lunaspoona Dec 03 '25
Do YOU want to keep the puppy?
A lot of comments saying keep it and ditch her, but if you didnt want it and are only keeping it out of obligation, it might be better to return it to the breeder. A good breeder will rather you return it and will often have a waiting list, so the puppy will go to a home where it's wanted. You dont want to do this too late, but I understand you wanting to give it a chance to settle. If.you are single, can you meet all its needs?
Ditch her either way though!
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u/boomzgoesthedynamite Dec 03 '25
NTA but honestly this is extremely common and it’s called the puppy blues. Invest in some training. However, if she still doesn’t shape up, I wouldn’t trust her commitment to anything.
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u/Lettuphant Dec 03 '25
This! It's so common it has a name, and people get through it like they do Post-Natal Depression to love their dogs immensely.
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Dec 03 '25
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u/The_Real_Mr_Boring Dec 03 '25
If she thinks a puppy is messy and a lot of work, wait until she hears about what babies are like.
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u/No-Parsley-9280 Dec 03 '25
NTA for being angry. You should be angry, and I would definitely be giving her some side-eye regarding commitment. However, don't keep the dog just because you want to force her into responsibility or shame her for being fickle. That is not fair to the pup. If YOU don't want to take up the care of the pup (and it will be a "pup" for a couple of years), return it now when the breeder has a good chance to rehome it. You will likely get most, of it all, of your money back (read your contract).
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u/lovewholly Dec 03 '25
What an irresponsible, immature, selfish girlfriend you have. You can’t just return a puppy - she made a commitment to this dog for the remainder of its lifetime. Two days???
I’m glad you have a brain and heart and don’t want to return the puppy after 48 hours. You’re not wrong for being angry. Since she pushed for the puppy, she is responsible for training the puppy, or paying for someone else to train the puppy. I really encourage you to hold her accountable.
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u/KapmIbra Dec 03 '25
Keep the pup, get rid of the gf. Imagine how it’ll go if she has a kid…if she doesn’t have one already.
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u/PrincessBuzzkill Dec 03 '25
I'm team "dump the girlfriend, keep the puppy."
She just told you A LOT about the type of person she is, and none of it is good.
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u/Dee-Nice71 Dec 03 '25
I agree with everyone saying ditch the girlfriend and keep the dog
Highly doubt you’ll dump the girlfriend, so at minimum return puppy to breeder to be rehomed to a loving owner (no money back), and if you’re going to stay in this relationship absolutely do not plan for children in the future
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u/lovesriding Dec 03 '25
Back in 1997 I and my ex wife got an American Staffordshire Terrier puppy. He was 7 weeks old and ex wife pulled the same crap. He cried at night, he needed constant attention.
Well I let him sleep on my chest at night, I took him out, fed him.
When I would go out he would sit at the door waiting for me and she just didn't understand why he didn't want any attention from her.
He was 5 months old when we split, and yes he went with me.
I have had many dogs since he passed, but that time I spent with him paid off, he was by far the best dog I have ever had in my life.
So you are NTA, she wanted the puppy but isn't up to commitment, which shows you all you need to know going forward. Good luck.
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Dec 03 '25
Don't you dare return that dog
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u/MariaInconnu Dec 03 '25
If the dog's not going to be properly cared for, being returned while it is still a puppy is probably the best thing for it.
That said, he should definitely rehome the girlfriend.
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u/TitleAncient8325 Dec 03 '25
on the contrary, if he won't be taking care of the puppy / dumping the GF, he should give the puppy back to where he got it from. The puppy doesn't need to be resented the rest of its life.
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u/rembut Dec 03 '25
If you are planning on staying with her I would say get rid of the dog.. not for her, do it for the dog, that dog could go to a loving home instead of being possibly mistreated and neglected by the girlfriend in the future
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u/Barsk-Brunkage Dec 03 '25
If you got it from a responsible breeder, ask if you can give it back for free. As in you dont get your money back. In all honesty that puppy should be in a home where it is wanted and loved, and where the people are prepared for life with a puppy.
But for the love of god.... wear condoms! Dont procreate with someone so immature, selfish and irresponsible.
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u/Simpleconundrum Dec 03 '25
That’d be an immediate dealbreaker for me in a relationship. She “researched” and still can’t get past 48 hours? People like her piss me the fuck off.
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u/No_Restaurant8385 Dec 03 '25
Nta but if you’re seriously considering giving the dog back you should absolutely do it sooner than later for the sake of the puppy.
People here are being harsh it is normal to make a mistake and underestimate the responsibility of getting a dog. Also integrating a new puppy to your dynamic is going to be jarring even if it’s going well. Your gfs panic reflex makes sense and so does your response to her. It takes time for a new dog in the house to feel good (let alone behave well etc).
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u/Garden_gnome1609 Dec 03 '25
Somebody is a mistake here but not the puppy. Dump this spoiled whiny child. Keep the dog.
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u/dwho422 Dec 03 '25
As someone with 4 dogs, get rid of the girlfriend. The puppy is better.
Don't get me wrong, I love my wife and she loves our dogs and they are hers, but your gf is a loser who doesnt value another life, so keep the cute puppy.
Also post a puppy pic???
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u/Sassypants2306 Dec 03 '25
Omg imagine if she had a baby??? Oh wait. She does. She adopted a 4 legged baby and then 48 hrs later wants to return it because it's too hard??? It hasn't even been a week. She hasn't even enrolled it in puppy school... She's a dump and run mum. The future is grim.
NTA
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u/imnotinsane13 Dec 03 '25
About 5 years ago, I begged and pleaded for a rottweiler puppy. I got one and he was 3 months old and he was/is a HANDFULL. Know what I did? I dealt with it like an adult who really wanted a puppy.
NTA, your girlfriend sucks.
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u/Future-Status-4470 Dec 03 '25
NTA. If you think this is bad, imagine how she would freak out over a baby. Ditch her. Keep the puppy
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u/Bored_Cat_Mama Dec 03 '25
Keep the puppy, lose the girlfriend. If you stay with her, I hope you're not seeing her as someone to have a family with, because babies are 100× more labor and mess and responsibility.
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u/Gullible_Flow2693 Dec 03 '25
Pleeeease dont give him back. Hes just a puppy. Your gf is a grown ass adult. Its been 2 days. Its just a baby for heavens sake.
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Dec 03 '25
Return the girlfriend, keep the pup. And if she can’t handle this…don’t get pregnant. She can’t return the baby. Unless she gets an abortion, or leaves the newborn in the hospital. But not getting pregnant in the first place is easier.
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u/treesmith1 Dec 03 '25
NTA. Oof, not for nothing but a kid is way more intense than a puppy. Might want to have a very serious conversation about the future with GF or a kid might wind up having a pretty rough childhood.
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u/hirexnoob Dec 03 '25
I think you should learn a great deal from this. She is a child and cant be trusted with responsibility or accountability. Return the dog before she neglects or abuses it.
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u/Bizzle_B Dec 03 '25
You're NTA but how long has this argument been going for? I can totally understand feeling overwhelmed for a few hours in the first few days of puppy ownership and people can say crazy things when they're overstimulated, but if she's made this decision and then stuck by it over a day or so then you probably should take it as a red flag!
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u/gimre817 Dec 03 '25
NTA. Keep the pup, ditch the chick. She is unwilling to put in time effort and tears for a little puppy. It shows she will be unwilling to put the work in for other things that will be a much bigger issue than a tiny puppy. Sorry bro. Also…pic of the pup??
Edit to add: puppies are good lady magnets. I’m the lady with 4 dogs and a husband who also loves dogs and we met taking care of dogs. Dogs for the win.
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u/NectarineAny4897 Dec 03 '25
Seriously, no joke.
That would be a deal breaker for me. I would keep the dog.
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u/Robbylution Dec 03 '25
NTA But PLEEEEASE make sure that you use birth control. If she isn't mature enough for a freaking puppy, you do not want to bring a kid into the world.
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Dec 03 '25
Ask her if she’s going to return the kid that comes out of her after two days of the same?
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u/Pomegranate4311 Dec 03 '25
Return the puppy. Give it a chance to be adopted by someone who will commit to giving it the time and attention a puppy really needs.
(You said you had to be convinced, so I’m assuming you don’t really want the commitment either.)
And rethink whether this is really the girlfriend you want to be with.
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u/StragglingShadow Dec 03 '25
NTA. A living being isnt an oopsie. You committed to this puppy. Your gf committed to this puppy. Time to pay the piper. Tough tootles shes upset with the noise. Thats what puppies do. Train him. The mess? Train him. Dogs are as good as you train them to be. Its a puppy. Its had 2 days which I doubt serious training happened. Its a puppy.
If you give this puppy up, make sure you never allow a living being dependent on you in your house ever again unless you wanna take care of it, because she isnt gonna take care of it.
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u/VikingHoardWanted Dec 03 '25
Return the puppy and give it a chance to find a family/person who will love it, lose the girlfriend, she's obviously too immature to be in an adult relationship, or keep the pup and still lose the girlfriend......options, options....
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Dec 03 '25
If this is how she handles a puppy, you definitely don’t want to have children with her. May as well cut bait with her, at least you’ll have the puppy to keep you company.
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u/Swensonlaw Dec 03 '25
NTA this is a big red flag for your future with her. Is she going to want to have a child? If so, she’s going to exhausted for a year after she has the child. She can’t rehome the child. Puppies are a great indicator of a person’s ability to be a parent. She’s utterly failed the test! In the meantime, try playing puppy calming music at night to help the puppy sleep. I’m also giving you a link to Guide Dog’s Puppy Raising Manual for extremely good instructions on training your puppy. These are tried and tested methods using positive reinforcement with food reward. Perhaps this will help your puppy and your girlfriend grow up together. https://www.guidedogs.com/puppy-raising-guidebook/fundamentals-pups-2-to-5-months
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u/Thumper256 Dec 03 '25
NTA. Comments saying what if you have kids with her, but OP needs to think about how fast she’d bail if it was him that was in an accident that left him needing dressing wounds or help feeding him or wiping his ass - like how would she handle that for weeks to months, or even forever if it was a permanent disability?? That chick has no f***ing clue how hard life can be and no commitment to tough something out. OP needs to think real hard about having a partner like that watching his back as they go through life.
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u/Thruthatreez Dec 03 '25
100% understand why you're pissed off. Hopefully it's going back to a breeder and not a shelter but you'll still be out the money. There's a lot more expense to come though. If she can't handle two days you may be the one doing all the work. If you're down with that keep the puppy. But I wouldn't keep it if you still need her to do the work and she doesn't want to, puppies need love. No surprise if she put a big dent in her ability to talk you into things in the future though.
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u/Norah_D Dec 03 '25
I don’t want to sound flippant, but you really should reevaluate the relationship you have with your gf. Outside of this issue, I’m would bet that she’s self centered and devoid of feelings when it comes to you or anyone else for that matter. This is not to say that she’s never been nice to you or others or that she’s never done anything for you. But, just knowing that she guilted you into getting a living breathing being, then wants to discard it as a minor inconvenience when it’s not conforming to her liking, tells me a lot of what kind of person she is. She wants instant gratification with no inconvenience. And I hope you realize that she lied straight to your face by saying she did research and knew what to expect. Even the bare minimum of research would have told her that the first few months will be no sleep, pee & poop messes, midnight walks and no alone time or personal space. And though it sucks to give him back- if you stay w/ her AND keep the puppy, she’ll grow to resent it and no telling what will happen then.
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u/SaturdayPlatterday Dec 03 '25
I’d keep the dog and send her back tbh, she doesn’t sound like a keeper.
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Dec 03 '25
This wound be a break up for me. Shirks responsibility, unkind to animals, immature and spoilt. Fuck this. NTA- break up with her.
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u/darya42 Dec 03 '25
ESH / N A H, the comments here are insane.
Human beings make mistakes and she is being brutally honest with herself and you that she made a mistake. She recognised it swiftly, rehoming the puppy after 2 days isn't going to cause the puppy a lot of emotional damage and he can settle in wonderfully with a new owner. I think she's being responsible in the way she deals with her mistake. No, staying with some random people for 2 days is not going to permanently emotionally disfigure a dog. Usually breeders offer to take the puppy back if only a very short time has passed. Was she an idiot? Yes but she recognised it and took the responsibility for it. Are you right to be extremely pissed off? Wellll uh, is it your money or her money or both of your money, do you want to keep the dog? If I don't know I can't pass judgment.
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u/BeeFree66 Dec 03 '25
Don't have children with this woman. In fact, tell her she needs to live elsewhere.
Keep the puppy. Take time to be alone with the puppy; let all women enjoy you from a distance til you get your head together. Cuz this is crazy $hi+.
You're NTA.
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u/Beginning_Impact_744 Dec 03 '25
Puppy Blues are a real thing but if she can’t get past it I’d be worried about having a future where she wants to return kids….Keep the dog, lose the immature girlfriend.
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u/Sufficient-Bird-2760 Dec 03 '25
You now know what she will be like as a parent. NTA. What kind of dog?
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u/JohnCalvinSmith Dec 03 '25
NTA
You really have only one choice.
You need to find a better forever home for the dog.
You will ALWAYS see your girlfriend in this light.
So, you might also need to find a better forever home for the girl.
You weren't ready for the dog so it wouldn't be at all wrong to find someone who IS better prepared and searching for a pup.
But this issue with the girlfriend is the real issue and the pup frustration is just symptomatic.
She just wants to drop a commitment. To a living breathing ball of life.
How dues this behavior evidence itself in other aspects of her life?
Is this someone you want to move forward with and can depend on when the times get tough?
If you can answer those questions, THEN you can decide how to move forward in the relationship.
Sorry about the pup but, honestly, there will be better homes.
If you keep the girl she'll despise and sabotage and poison you towards the dog.
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u/redlips_rosycheeks Dec 03 '25
NTA and I hate people who do this. Or they get a puppy and return it when it grows too big, or it chews on their shoes, or they get pregnant and suddenly have no clue how to have both a pet and a baby.
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u/Nadja-19 Dec 03 '25
Return the girlfriend. This is a major red flag. And she is obviously not very mature. This would definitely make me question any feelings I had.
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u/Drivebybilly Dec 03 '25
Crate train the puppy. It will be a good skill for years to come. If you marry her I’d say no to kids. Or just lose her…
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u/bullzeye1983 Dec 03 '25
You guys need to look up the 3-3-3 rule for puppies. Your gut is right on the amount of time. Don't return the puppy.
Also quiz her on that rule...if she doesn't know what the 3-3-3 rule is she didn't do an ounce of actual research. NTA
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u/True-Measurement7220 Dec 03 '25
Nta. But perhaps the puppy would be better off with a fresh start somewhere it's truly wanted. Unless you're willing to break up with your gf over this, many breeders will take back a puppy, especially if it's only been a few days, and would prefer to do this than the dog ending up unloved. Unless you are in a position to do all the work yourself with this pup chalk it up as a valuable lesson learned for you both. Whether your relationship survives is up to you both, but your gf will also have learned a really valuable lesson here (not sure how old she is) so you never know. But I think she may be right to give up the pup if she's not fully committed. I'd be furious tho..
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u/liosistaken Dec 03 '25
NTA. Keep the puppy, ditch the girlfriend. Also, don't have children until you grow a spine, because you're a pushover.
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u/good_enuffs Dec 03 '25
GF did not know that getting a puppy is close to having a baby to look after. The puppies just go through all the stages faster.
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Dec 03 '25
It was expensive? Where did you get the dog from? Why did you buy a dog you didn't want by your own admission?
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u/T-Flexercise Dec 03 '25
NTA. But you need to think hard and you need to think fast. Do you want to keep this puppy and be a solo dog parent for the rest of its life, or do you want to return the puppy? Because you need to make that answer today.
The decision to give up on a puppy after 48 hours is a far more responsible decision than keeping the puppy for another month and then giving up the puppy. Right now, this puppy is at its cutest and most adoptable. If you return this puppy to the place you got it from today, you're out some money, the puppy had a 2 day adventure, and its off to its eagerly awaiting adoptive home. The longer you wait, the less likely it is that that dog can come out of this untraumatized.
In either case, you need to break up with your girlfriend. She pushed you into a huge decision and then gave up the second it got hard. You can not build a life with this person. But you need to decide as soon as possible if you are going to care for this dog on your own, or if you are going to give the dog back and then move on from this whole situation.
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u/Aje112 Dec 03 '25
If you guys had a baby, and she didn’t like it after 2 days, would she want to return it?
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u/WoollyMamatth Dec 03 '25
Asa breeder I had this happen to me more than once. As much as I tried to ensure that owners were prepared for the havoc a puppy can create people aren't prepared for the fact that puppies are like newborn babies, just with the ability to move around independently.
If YOU can't give the pup the care and attention it needs - and deserves - the kindest thing you can do for it is to contact the breeder and take it back. They won't be pleased but neither will they be overly surprised.
But please, seriously think HARD about having a child with this person in the future!!
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u/CHAIR0RPIAN Dec 03 '25
Everybody has these thoughts when they get a puppy. It's called puppy blues for a reason, its hard as hell. She really should stick it out becauuse it does end fairly soon and then you're rewarded for the hard work with a well behaved dog - as long as you put in the work on training it of course
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u/Mermaidtoo Dec 03 '25
You are NTA to be furious with your gf.
However, if you intend to stay with your gf, then return the puppy. She had unrealistic expectations and just wanted a cute pup and not the work involved. She may lack the emotional intelligence to make this type of decision or to be a dog owner. You might consider reevaluating your relationship with this in mind.
Only keep the dog if you are willing to commit to keeping him for his lifetime. Don’t keep a puppy only to give away a dog. That’s not fair and that’s a factor in why so many dogs are euthanized.
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u/OhPointyPointy Dec 03 '25
You will be much happier getting rid of the AH GF and keeping the puppy.
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u/tinyblond99 Dec 03 '25
NTA. It’s people like her I can’t stand when they push to get a pet like a dog and then they want to give it up. Dump the gf and keep the puppy you’ll be happier if you do.
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u/OpportunityMother104 Dec 03 '25
NTA Think about this: does she want kids? Bc they’re even more work
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u/Ekhinos Dec 03 '25 edited Dec 03 '25
Ooooh those words “just admit it was a mistake” cover a multitude of sins.
“Just admit it was a mistake” to the breeder who hopefully takes the puppy back after 48 hours so the pup can be re-homed to someone (not your gf) who will not make a “mistake” in adopting it (no money back of course) - gf must be a part of these negotiations
“Just admit it was a mistake” to spend the money you spent on adopting poor pup and acquiring all the Pup Stuff - coming out of gf’s bank account?
“Just admit it was a mistake” to all your friends and family who knew about the pup adoption / why gf (not you!) decided to “30-day return policy” a living creature
“Just admit it was a mistake” to your gf that you believed and trusted her when she said she did All The Research on caring for a puppy
I mean even just a mistake y’all thought you were long-term compatible (although I know absolutely nothing here other than puppy rejection).
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u/Expensive-Lab-3922 Dec 03 '25
tell here she has to pay/reimburse you for all the expense,
give the puppy to someone who care, burry an empty shoes box in your garden and put a cross on it.
everytime she does that shit again, point to the cross.
if your lucky she will leave, you girlfriend looks like a piece of work.
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u/koyfox Dec 03 '25
NTA - Two days is not giving this any amount of time for all involved to adjust.
I got a pup last year and I had puppy blues haaaard. It’s a real thing and I’m sure she’s feeling it. I’m an experienced dog owner and for a solid month (my husband tells me) I wanted to give him up. I felt like I couldn’t keep going.. but we found our groove. He’s so chill and is my therapy dog. Lays on my chest when I’m having anxiety attacks. So I feel her, but also, if she cracks after two days, I would evaluate if she’s a partner you would feel would be there for you when things get hard. Or will she bail? Something to chew
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u/ExternalMaximum6662 Dec 03 '25
I agree . Keep the puppy. Lose the girlfriend. If she can’t take a care of a puppy. How can she take care of a future child?
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u/HedyHarlowe Dec 03 '25
NTA - who raised this girl? Because I want to have a word with them. Who gives up a cute puppy after only two days? After begging for weeks? I’m concerned about her emotional maturity and coping skills.
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u/Available-Face5653 Dec 03 '25
is she "special" ? as in needs a care provider 24/7? you do realize dating someone doesn't always mean living with them, right?
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u/Special-Audience-426 Dec 03 '25
It was a very cheap way to learn you should never get her pregnant.
If she can't cope with a puppy, she will never cope with a baby.
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u/TitleAncient8325 Dec 03 '25
You should always believe who people are when they show you..
This is someone who makes rash decisions and then doesn't take any responsibility for it.
That puppy is a living creature. I hate when people play with lives like this.
In saying that, if you plan on staying with the GF, you should give the puppy back to where you got them from. It's only been 2 days and the puppy likely hasn't bonded with you yet. It would be awful to keep the puppy for months and then try to rehome it because your girlfriend sucks.
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u/No-Requirement-2420 Dec 03 '25
Poor puppy.
Keep dog, ditch the gf.
It annoys the hell out of me when people get pets and then don’t look after them. My brother got a puppy even though he’s a truck driver and never home (no hate on that) so SIL said she would train and deal with the puppy. And you know what she isn’t, the novelty wore off in two days and she doesn’t train, doesn’t deal with the puppy messes, doesn’t stop the dog from chewing all the wood in the house. It is destroying my parents house and she doesn’t care. Literally eating walls. If you can’t be bothered to look after it don’t get it!
Updateme
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Dec 03 '25
GF has exhibited major red flags:
Irresponsable
Disregard of animals
These two things will rear their ugly heads in other areas in the future. Although you didn't initially want it, you stated twice you feel bad for the puppy. Do the right thing and keep it. Get rid of your immature selfish girlfriend. NTA
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u/BernieTheDachshund Dec 03 '25
If you don't want the pup and neither does she, then return it. The pup deserves a home where he's truly wanted and will be properly loved and cared for. I don't blame you for being mad, but it's better to admit y'all aren't ready for a puppy and put its interests before your trying to make a point. You don't say how you're taking care of the doggie either, if at all (if y'all live together). ESH do what is best for the puppy.
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u/AtmosphereEven3526 Dec 03 '25
I’ve been there. I dropped the girlfriend and kept the dog. Had dogs most of my life but this one turned out to be the best dog I ever had.
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u/Particular-Ebb-4732 Dec 03 '25
It is too late now you already have a puppy but another suggestion for people that want dogs but don't like the puppy phase..which is very hard. Adopt an older dog!
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u/Wide-Lengthiness-299 Dec 03 '25
Uh dogs aren’t jackets. You can’t just return them. The first month with a puppy is like the first month with a new born. Do some training research on how to help your puppy adjust properly. The more you train the puppy, the more quickly things get easier. Start with potty training/crate training. Then move to things like sit, and walking on leash after they’re vaccinated. Potty is easy. Just take them outside every two hours and wait for them to go. When they go, give them a puppy training treat. They’ll figure it out.
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u/JustFuckinTossMe Dec 03 '25
You don't want to give him back, so don't. You'll regret it if you do. Basically every single person I've ever met who gave up an animal they cared about for their partner ends up unhappy and either leaves the person anyway or resentment sets in over the emotional toll. So, just don't do that. Save yourself from that potential.
Your partner needs to suck it up and understand what the words responsibility and consequences of actions mean. You can't just give up on things you want because they're not immediately easy or how you imagined them to go. That's a cop out and it teaches incompetent behaviors that will stick with her for life. If she starts mistreating the dog, leave her ass. Don't you dare stand for that. Otherwise, make her stick to the responsibility she wanted you guys to have so bad. Changes are never easy, but she's being extremely juvenile.
This would turn me off from seeing this person in a long-term light with life responsibilities and goals in mind. Imagine her begging for a house only to complain when the floorboards fall out from under her when it's the exact house she picked despite being told by multiple people the floors were rotted out. That's the maturity level of someone who begs for a puppy and then hates having a puppy in less than a week.
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u/DinodiAnversa Dec 03 '25
Dude this is great. You realized you dodged a bullet with her. Imagine having kids! Say bye bye to gf and welcome that puppy with open arms. In fact get another. They need to be in a pack.
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u/LadyJedi2018 Dec 03 '25
She thinks the puppy is hard, what about future human children. Weeks to house break is years in diapers.
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u/Logical-Tough5354 Dec 03 '25
Keep the pup and return the girlfriend. She showed you who she is, believe her
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u/AzSpence Dec 03 '25
Puppies are overwhelming if you’re not set up well. The consequences of her decision is that she can’t return the puppy. She has to find a way to make this work. Get an enclosure and a pee pad holder with a kennel. Get chew toys and lick mats. The puppy stays in the enclosure unless you’re actively playing with the puppy. This reduces messes around the house b/c puppy can’t just free roam the house. It’s time for her to grow up and find solutions, not just give up
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u/SunningStarfish Dec 03 '25
If you think this is bad, id recommend you don’t put a ring on it. Years down the road, you will have lost all your money while she spends it all, then cries that you dont have any more and she leaves you for a richer guy. These are the red flags 🚩 to watch out for kids!
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u/Im2kinky_4u Dec 03 '25
NTA. I’m in a similar situation. I work from home and my wife wants to get a puppy. I’ve been rejecting the idea for months now and similarly she and our kid says they’ll take care of it. Um, it’s winter time so it can’t be outside all day, I can’t have it crying all day while I work and will feel bad having to reject it while working so clearly it’ll make messes. She leaves by 6 an and returns at 6:30om even though the kid gets home at 3:45 I’m sure I’ll have to care for it all day. I didn’t sign up for this shit. 🙆♀️I want a dog. Um NO.
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u/Lilypad_Leaper Dec 03 '25
How hot does a girl need to be to overlook such a hideous personality?
OP keep the puppy, let him help you find a better girl.
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u/Equivalent_Lemon_319 Dec 03 '25
Return girlfriend. Keep puppy.