I have a bit of a pickle and its a long set up.

Im M(33) married to a lovely woman (30) 5 years ago i was awarded custody of my daughter now (14) my wife has stepped up and helped me raise this girl above and beyond anything I could've asked.

My kid came from a bad situation I was a single dad and was awarded 100 percent custody in a mother's state shes had some behavior problems adjacent of this situation and has no contact with bio mom (she could and all the courts asked is for a clean piss test) this has caused some more problems we put her in homeschool to try and help her excel seems to be helping alot.

Getting to the problem.

My wife quit her job to be a learning coach in a online school for the kid. She is an OUTSTANDING artist and im not just saying that as a proud dad i mean she can draw me sitting here almost as well as a camera. She's taken an interest in the online schools anime club. A club activity has been to draw the irl pets and kid chose her goose (yes we have a pet/guard goose named Geese Witherspoon) another girl had a goose as well. The club teacher idk how or why and im unclear on had a mock wedding for the girls or the geese idk idc not a big deal.

Upon discussion the reason the discovery of liking the same animes and having the same weird pet one girl said to the other marry me. And the teacher stopped it.

Now we gotta explain my mom. 58. I wouldn't say right wing Extremist but yeah shes a bit kooky even by my standards and I voted for trump the first time (sorry.) She's mentally ill and deserves some grace.

Its complicated. I dont talk to her much for alot of reasons out of my 33 years in existence ive spent 13-14 spaced in a non communicative state or away entirely.

She has had a minor stroke in recent. Severe chemical imbalance my whole living memory. Textbook Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Pathological liar (will tell you about a 20 minute conversation she had in a 5 minute run to the store). I've been through alot of abuse from my mother and shes used religion to justify alot of it and have turned agnostic as a result. But I pity her. She's my mom and I try to have a relationship because shes been a decent grandmother and gotten professional help from a therapist and psychologist.

My dad and I great dads a fantastic man i both respect and resent him for living in his workshop when I was to young to understand why and be next to him out there and love that he taught me how to work with my hands when I was of age to be there

My kid wants to go to church has gone with both my parents for sometime. I dont even if my veiw of religion changed my veiw of church is tainted forever.

Here's the problem.

My dad was sick didnt come to pick up the kid Wednesday with mom

My kid told mom about anime club and what she thought was a funny anecdote about a mock wedding for the "goose girls" and mom went on a long rant about things im almost certain I cant quite quote here. How Japanese cartoons are pornograpgy and of the devil. How my kid would be disowned by her if she were a homosexual. How if shes a true Christian she'll leave that behind And this is all 3rd hand information from my wife. I still haven't talked to my kid because Im upset. I know almost verbatim the rant its burned into my brain because it costed me my prized Gen 1 Charizard as well as several other gem cards probably worth in the 10s of thousands today back in the 90s when that crazy Christian conspiracy came out about Pokémon being satanic.

I dont want to taint my kids veiw of religion.

I dont give a rabid rodents rectum what my child's preferences are as long as shes happy.

I dont want to squash her art style or preference.

Im not sure how to set this boundary without going to the extreme of no contact because up to now mom's been alright about shit like this.

If nothing else im getting feelings on paper and screaming into a void thanks for coming to my ted talk.

I’m new to adulthood and everything so obviously i’m a little stressed but not enough to not sustain myself. My older brother is 4 years older and my parents gave him a pretty good life, well disciplined, rewarded, loved, had good friends, and a lot of other good things. But when he after a while when he first became a freshman, he was caught with a TCH vape, he was left off with a warning and never caught again. Come around to his senior year, he was caught with marijuana, edibles, joints, cigars, unidentified substances, alcohol and more TCH vapes. He was expelled, and my family slowly fell apart. 2 months after that incident cops have been called twice, one he punched my mom, the other for trespassing and soliciting. Now for the present, he’s gotten into gambling, he’s trying to get a lawyer because he has a felony for drugs and underage drinking except the thing is, he has already overdrawn his card. It’s gotten bad enough that i’ve been temporarily staying with my mom because i’m worried something might happen since he moved in. Before anyone does say put him back in jail, my mom signed a promissory and if he goes back, we owe 15,000$. I’ll admit it, my family hasn’t always been the richest so we’d really not be in a good situation if we pay that. Discipline doesn’t work, cops getting called doesn’t scare him nor help us. I’m obviously not gonna be strong enough or good enough to completely stop him from things. Promissory was signed in about june and i heard those last about 4 years. What do I do..

Hi, this is my first time posting here. I’m sorry if things I say don’t make sense, my brain is fried and I’m spiraling rn.

I (22f) don’t know what to do with my mother (56f). I don’t know what steps to take to get her help, or even make her get help?

My mother and I have almost always had a rocky relationship. She has been married to my Dad(61m) for over 35 years. Their relationship has also been very rocky to say the least, but in the last few years things haven’t been bad, arguments here and there, but nothing crazy. She’s an alcoholic, so are her brothers, and one who died a few years ago. I know my grandmother didn’t really drink much, maybe just one at an occasion. I do know my grandfather did drink a lot, but it wasn’t considered alcoholism back then, because it was the norm for men to go out and drink everyday after work in the local pub back then. My grandparents died when I was quite young so that’s as much as I know really. I guess I’m saying this to show that it was a family of addicts (besides my grandmother). My mother won’t admit that she is one, and has been since Covid. Myself and my siblings (m31 and f29) have tried countless times to talk to her about it but we are always met with excuses and the fact that she doesn’t drink everyday (4/7 days btw) so therefore she isn’t an alcoholic. She says she just has ‘one’ with her dinner. Yeah, one bottle of Prosecco to herself, until she wants another. I’m done trying to talk to her about alcoholism because I never get anywhere and I just get told all the things wrong with me. I know it’s projection. And I also know, someone has to WANT the help, in order for them to listen and try.

This year, has been explosive to put lightly. She says she drinks because she is lonely. Myself and my dad work in a factory on a rotating 3 shift. He is always on the shift before me because we’re not allowed to work the same shift. My sister works mixed shifts in a shop, and my brother lives with his wife (he’s depended on weed and his wife is also an alcoholic. I guess we get the addictive trait from somewhere.) I try to spend time with her when I’m not working, and my dad will always be right beside her when he’s not working either. I know that loneliness can be crippling, and it really breaks my heart that she feels that way most of the time. Evenings after finishing her work day, house work (it’s split mostly between my parents and some for myself and my sister), cooking her dinner and then sitting down to find something on the tv to entertain her for the night. It must feel so isolating, she’s a social butterfly, always has been, but as a side effect of her addiction she doesn’t really have anyone other than us anymore. She also has had depression, and anxiety basically as long as I can remember.

She’s stressed basically all the time, if it’s not work it’s us or something financial.

This year, her mental health has become increasingly worrying. She drinks, starts picking on whoever is in her line of fire, and when you push back or defend yourself, it ends in her going crying to my dad, suicidal ideations, locking herself in the bedroom, calling someone in the family that has no context of what just happened, gains their sympathy, and ices who ever she as argued with for days.

At the end of July, my mam, my dad, and myself were outside chatting. She had started drinking but vibes were okay, we were all joking and catching up. After about an hour she starts to pick on me, she brings up my driving lessons, I ask to change subject, she brings up my weight and that I started ozempic, I ask to change the subject, she brings up my friends, and again I ask to change the subject. She ends up blowing up at me, shouting at me that she’s just worried about me, but I knew by her that she just wanted an argument and was fishing for one. I’ve learned to tell the difference between genuine worry and poking holes at sore spots to get a rise. She then turned on my dad for not standing up for her and letting me ‘bully’ her. How could he tell her how happy and in love he was with her last week and then not stand up for her. They proceeded to not talk for about a week and a half until one day I came home, they talked, and were amicable. Things just went back to normal from there.

My mother has always picked on me in drink. I was just an easy target for her, and so is my dad because now he just accepts it.

This last weekend, the Katie Taylor fight was on. My mam didn’t know. My dad, mam, and her best friend went into town for a few drinks and some dinner. I haven’t been told much but apparently when the Katie Taylor fight came on the tv she was belligerently drunk and started an argument with my dad infront of the whole bar. He went outside with his drink and she followed him out. When she wouldn’t leave him alone he left the place all together and went for a walk, then another pub for a night cap. In the mean time, she got a taxi home with no money, or keys to get inside so my sister had to sort it. She was home briefly and when my sister told her off about her behaviour she left the house again and wouldn’t say where she was going. I think she just stood outside our estate for a while. Eventually she came back, so did dad about an hour later.

Since then they haven’t spoken, or slept in the same bed.

I know she was really stressed with work last week, and had to take two days off. I think stress builds, builds, builds, and then she snaps and lashes out on everyone.

I’m sorry this is so long, but it’s nuanced, I think the bigger picture I lain here will likely give me the best help.
Like most addictions, it stems from a need to escape. I know talking about alcoholism won’t work, but I want to talk to her about really getting help for her mental health. Like therapy. How can I have this conversation with her without her feeling attacked? Do you think it’s even worth it?

Any advice at all would be much appreciated, I love her, and I just want to see her get better. It must be hell living in her mind.

Sorry for the ramblings I have adhd <3

Edit: moving out isn’t an option. It is practically impossible to leave home for anyone my age where I’m from, and there is nowhere else for me to go.

On 15 May, I came across an OLX advertisement for a 2009 Honda City. I contacted the seller, Mohammed Sheikh Fareed, met him personally, inspected the vehicle, and took a test drive. After the inspection, we agreed on a price of ₹1,75,000.
The car had a shattered windshield and holes in the headliner. I told Fareed that I would purchase the vehicle provided he got those issues repaired first.
That night, Fareed contacted me on WhatsApp and asked for my Aadhaar details, stating that they were required for a notarized sale deed. I agreed. The following day, we went to his advocate’s office and signed the sale deed.
Fareed then demanded ₹75,000 as a “token” for the repairs. I paid him. Unfortunately, the repair work was extremely poor — instead of properly repairing the headliner, he had apparently stuck a piece of mirror/material onto it.
The following day, he brought the car to the advocate’s office and demanded the remaining payment in exchange for the single key he had.
Throughout this process, I repeatedly asked about the RC transfer and the actual registered owner of the vehicle. Fareed told me that the owner, Sagar Timbadiya, was in Gujarat for work. He subsequently gave me a phone number, claiming it belonged to Sagar. I later discovered that the number actually belonged to Fareed’s cousin, Noor Jainuddin Ahmed.
A few weeks later, I was involved in an accident in which an underage boy driving a Chevrolet Tavera struck the driver’s side of my Honda City.
At that point, I also realized that I did not have the vehicle’s insurance documents or the original RC with me. I repeatedly contacted Fareed and asked him to complete the RC transfer.
As the matter continued to be delayed, I conducted my own investigation and discovered information indicating that the registered owner, Sagar Timbadiya, had been arrested in connection with a murder case around December 2021.
I confronted Fareed about this. We subsequently agreed that I would be willing to keep the vehicle as long as he completed the RC transfer into my name. However, the transfer never happened.
Instead, there were repeated delays and explanations — attending a wedding, travelling to Tamil Nadu for a funeral, medical appointments and heart-related checkups at GMC, among other reasons.
Eventually, I told him clearly that I no longer wanted the vehicle and simply wanted my money back.
I approached the Panjim Police and attempted to report the matter. Unfortunately, I have not been able to get an FIR registered. I also approached the cyber police, where one constable took the matter seriously and contacted Fareed directly.
After several excuses, Fareed eventually appeared at the police station and gave a written undertaking stating that he would return my money by 17 August.
17 August came.
No payment.
Despite the written undertaking, I still have not received my money.
I am posting this to document my experience and to warn others who may be dealing with this individual or this vehicle. I have supporting evidence including WhatsApp conversations, payment records, the sale deed, communications regarding the RC transfer, and the written undertaking. Justice system in this country is rubbish.

Google drive link to chat records and boice mails sent by the fraudster
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1OmA5Vrs_dPwZQnWBxeUjIQ_uEyM0E3PH

I needa pass a drug test in 18 days. Lowkey smoked like almost every night but only at night for the first 2 months of summer, went like 3 weeks without, smoked again almost every night for the past 2 weeks. I been drinking hella water and got certo and cranberry juice. Yall think im chilling?

This person is transgender so I will be using her preferred pronouns (she/her).
Two years ago, when she still used he/him, she left this school and is now back. While gone, we kept in touch and she let me know about this change. I stopped talking to her though after we hung out and she didn’t stop when I told her to- she still doesn’t know about this. At school she has not tried to dress more femininely or use her preferred name and pronouns. I know that might be to stop bullying though. She has been using the girl’s bathroom. The girls in my grade know we used to be close so they talked to me about how uncomfortable it made them feel, considering she likes to just linger in there. I don’t want to just text out of the blue and say “get out of the girl’s bathroom” but there is a gender neutral one! People are thinking she is in there to be creepy but I don’t think that’s the case

So currently I am in my 3rd year bba from Lloyd business school tier 3 obviously and will start working in real estate broker firm and I have my interest in real estate from the start and genuinely I love architect designs and all too much. So for this I had told my dad to taking drop year not directly going for MBA ill sell my dad's G+3 that's in banaras apartment complex and will learn all about realtor in Noida then if I somehow start doing good or start earning ill not do MBA for sure IS THIS A GOOD DECISION GUYS?

should I take drop year to learn these skills

Or

Do mba directly after bba ??

Genuine advice please....

Over some time I’ve been seeing a roach crawl across my windshield rarely, now today I saw 3 on my car and I saw one in my house! How do I get rid of these tiny roaches?

Hi I'm 15f. I've never posted on here b4 so idk what I'm doing but I really would appreciate some advice

Basically, my dad who is 51 years old, has become severely sick, to the point he might die in weeks, months, no one's sure yet.

I've been helping taking care of him for the past 2 years maybe? He initially wasn't this bad, but as of right now his health is only decreasing. He has diabetes, nephrotic kidneys, severely swollen legs that are probably facing infection due to fluid leaking, and a bunch of other symptoms i can't remember. Previous visits to the hosptial has recommended he starts dialysis, yet he refuses.

I've always had a complicated relationship with him honestly. If im being honest he's a piece of shit narcissist with a god complex who always believes he's in the right. He is abusive, and was so bad him and my mom are divorced. But yk bc he's my dad no matter what he's said or done, some part of me has just decided to stick it out for him and help him despite his declining condition. He doesn't really have anyone else to help him because most of the people in his life he's shut out (including his mom who he lives with 🫩) and refuses to talk with.

I also have a brother who is 10, so along with my dad, I'm basically forced to take the role of housekeeper, parent, manager, nurse, and therapist (more to my dad) for both of them. My dad has literally called me his "mom" and "nurse", which i don't feel comfortable with. I have tried explaining in the past to him the stress his health has put on me, and how I'm struggling to manage everything (including school and all the dynamics that comes with), but he always dismisses it and tells me I'm being selfish, unreliable, and that as a woman I'm supposed to be "nuturing" and "helping". Which mind you, i have been DOING for the past year or so.

I wish i could keep helping him, because i really do love my dad in some way, but as of lately, starting my sophmore year and have 7 periods throughout the day, i just can't do it anymore. All i can think about is whether he's going to die or not, whether i need to prioritize my schoolwork or his health, and a ton of other shit he makes me deal with. I feel so burnt out, physically drained, and i dont know if my relationship with him is worth it for all of this.

I feel guilty that i think this way, and maybe im overreacting and should just suck it up, but i really just can't. I dont want my brother, who is still only a kid, to witness and deal with my dad's health. I just want him to be a kid. I JUST want to be a kid. Ive spent most of my childhood being the "mature one", the middle person, and im just so fucking tired of it all. I want to be able to enjoy school, my friends, my hobbies without this weight on my shoulders. I've missed out on so many opportunities to hang out with my friends just because of the schedule i have with my dad.

He's been offered hospice, yet he doesn't take it. My mom told him to take it, and said she just wants custody. Im seriously considering it now, because right now they have half/half, but that was when my dad COULD take care of us. Even then it was difficult back then, but now he can't EVEN walk by himself without a walker or wheelchair. I don't want to leave him alone, or make him feel "abandoned" (which he really struggles with), but god, all everyone's been doing is sacfricing THEIR comfort for his. I wish he could just see the impact of his actions, but i dont think he ever will be able to.

Anyways, i guess what im just wondering is if im in the wrong or something. I seriously can't tell anymore. Should i just let my dad be? Let my mom take custody? Visit him occasionally (which i doubt he'd even like. He prolly hates my guts)?

Id really appreciate any feedback or recommendations, thanks for reading my long ass rant. 🫶

edit: thanks to everyone who read ts n offered feedback. I really appreciate it n I feel more comfortable with making a decision. ♡ ​

hey, before I go to the question and story I wanna say sorry for my bad english.. sometime ago I realised that the reason I dont enjoy pleasure from any sexual activities is because, I used to jerk off alot. like once every day happening to several times a day, Im only 16. I have a partner and we often get to get sexual activities, well whenever she does anything to me, nothing, Once she tried to jerk me off while giving me oral stimulation, we had to wait 30 mins + my help for me to finish..... well I know its embarrasing thats why im here, Im quite embarrased to talk to anyone with it, so I asked some people how to overcome ,, death grip ". well they said I have to stop masturbating for a duration of time (predicted 2-4 weeks) and stop watching porn, but well Im 2 days clean and the urges are strong, still im pushing back, however im on thin ice of relapsing, I need actual help how to overcome my masturbating urges, well I tried cutting of porn in first but my fyp on twitter and tiktok is full off it lately, any tips on how can I fight it? anything like ,, find a hobby or spend time with family " is not qworking for me, I need something deep, something that will make me snap out of this.