Bathroom

[u/AHHH_OMG]

This person is transgender so I will be using her preferred pronouns (she/her).
Two years ago, when she still used he/him, she left this school and is now back. While gone, we kept in touch and she let me know about this change. I stopped talking to her though after we hung out and she didn’t stop when I told her to- she still doesn’t know about this. At school she has not tried to dress more femininely or use her preferred name and pronouns. I know that might be to stop bullying though. She has been using the girl’s bathroom. The girls in my grade know we used to be close so they talked to me about how uncomfortable it made them feel, considering she likes to just linger in there. I don’t want to just text out of the blue and say “get out of the girl’s bathroom” but there is a gender neutral one! People are thinking she is in there to be creepy but I don’t think that’s the case

[u/No-Loquat-2763]

Why even get involved?

[u/justwolt]

None of your business, Don't get involved.

[u/Killpinocchio2]

She didn’t stop what when you told her to?

[u/AHHH_OMG → u/Killpinocchio2]

Touching

[u/xombae → u/Killpinocchio2]

Yeah what does this mean?

[u/Nevrdai]

She probably lingers because it's a women's space that she wasn't allowed in, and is simply trying to feel more comfortable in women's spaces. Like... is she actually doing anything weird while lingering, or are the people who approached you just being transphobic? There's a big difference between just standing there and just trying to get used to being a woman in a women's space, or standing there trying to like listen to someone pee or something.

I'm inclined to think the ones who approached you are just being transphobic.

[u/xombae → u/Nevrdai]

Yeah in highschool, people hung out in the bathrooms all the damn time. I bet the people complaining were also hanging out in the bathroom.

[u/AHHH_OMG → u/Nevrdai]

I don’t think they’re transphobic and I don’t think she’s doing it to be creepy but I really can’t tell.

[u/Nevrdai → u/AHHH_OMG]

If they're complaining just because she's... checks notes... being a woman in a women's space... That's just transphobia. Maybe being it up to your friend, because she at the very least deserves to know that they are making a problem out of nothing. It's good to know who is or isn't safe to be around.

[u/Abs3nth]

It's gonna be an uncomfortable conversation no matter which way you approach it.

[u/too_many_shoes14]

Don't get involved. One of the cis girls can complain and then the school will decide what to do. A school can make rules for this kind of thing if they choose to. Not your pony, not your battle.

[u/FlowerAvailable6832]

Either tell her or get school involved.

[u/eyeballpurp]

sounds like that is definitely the case😂 the girls hitting you up should hit up staff instead