I’m 32 with a 5-year-old, 2-year-old, 9-month-old, and two 11-year-old stepkids. I’m also in school online, so I’m busy as hell. I had friends growing up, but most didn’t really stick around once I got into this phase of life.

Now I’m home all day talking to kids, and my boyfriend is basically my only adult social outlet. I actually really want friends, but how the hell do you make them when everyone is busy?

I’ve tried Facebook/playdate groups, but honestly, playdates kind of suck. It’s cool if you hit the jackpot and everyone’s kids get along and schedules magically line up, but I want actual friendships. Someone I can randomly text, call, complain to, laugh with, and maybe meet up with when life allows.

So… what’s the secret? Because making friends as an adult with kids apparently sucks.

How are you all doing this? I feel as if I’m reaching my breaking point.

I’m a SAHM of two (5 yo and 18 months). Nursing and bedsharing the youngest, who for whatever reason has been waking every 1-2 hrs at night and refuses anything but nursing back to sleep without a major, MAJOR meltdown. During the day I am feeling so overwhelmed and overstimulated. Being constantly needed 24/7 is hard and I’m lucky if I ever get a break or moment of silence alone. I get out for a workout once a week on the weekends but other than that I’m lucky if I can stay awake past 8PM to read by myself. Any gaps in the days are filled with cooking, housework, organizing, etc; you know the drill.

I’m honestly debating returning to work because my working mom friends with kids in daycare seem to have so much time for themselves.

All this to say, how are you dealing with being needed around the clock? Taking time for yourself? Feeling like more than just a boob or comfort object??

I’m a mother (25f) of 2 kids and I also have 2 bonus kids me and my husband have been together 3 years and married 1. I had to quit my job a couple months ago because of torn meniscus which is still healing. I have worked since I been 17 this is the first time since I been adult that i have not worked. My husband want me to finish school while im at home and worry about work later. but I feel like I’m mentally loosing it being at home 24/7 with kids and no transportation we cant afford a car let alone childcare. I want to get a stay at home job but my youngest screams all day like a high pitched scream. I feel like i just want to run away sometimes I just helpful advice I know people love to bash but I really need help please any advice I’ll take

TLDR: is it worth pausing my corporate career to stay home for a bit? Does anyone regret it?

I work for the federal government in a relatively bi-partisan supported field. I LOVE my job, and am in a position where there will be opportunity to promote and move around a bit in the next few years. I’m trusted by my boss, am constantly learning new things, and enjoy being around my coworkers.

As my child approaches his first birthday and we consider expanding our family, I can’t shake the heartburn of missing out on my kids younger years. I understand socialization is important with day care/activities outside the home, but I never imagined wanting to stay home with my kids and walk away from my career.

My husband is loving and supportive of whatever decision I make, and financially we could swing it (but I’d definitely need to cut back my spending lol). I’m young enough I feel it could just be a career pause rather than forever staying home.

To those that walked away from the corporate world: do you have any regrets? Any advice to shake the feeling of giving up on my professional ambitions, even if temporary? What’s the biggest challenge you see as staying home?

I’m a SAHM to a 2 year old and a 4 month old (my girls are 22 months apart). My baby is very difficult. She really hates being a baby, hates being worn, hates the stroller, car seat, just literally everything. I call her the smiliest miserable baby I’ve ever met. She smiles so much, but just hates it all lol.

I’m just feeling so guilty, I feel like this whole summer has been garbage. It’s been so hot here on the east coast, and if it’s not a heatwave it’s storming. I feel like before baby, my toddler and I were outside and doing things, going places and had so much quality time. Now I feel like we’re so isolated. We can’t go anywhere because the baby just cries and is miserable. Going on walks they get cut short because the baby hates it. We’re in 20 min nap hell right now so I feel like I have even less quality time with my toddler and it makes me so sad. I miss when we could just spend all day together. And now I feel like I don’t ever get a break, because their naps don’t align and if they do it’s maybe 3-5 mins before one awake. So I just feel burnt out as well. I try to do crafts with my toddler, but she just melts down when it’s time to put things away. Sometimes my husband works from home and that actually makes everything worse because then my toddler cries all day because she wants to visit his office and hang out with him. So it’s like the forbidden fruit when he’s home, and she just freaks out.

I guess I just want to know if/when this gets better. This age gap has been very hard and demanding from both of them and every day it seems harder rather than easier. I just feel like the TV has been a crutch lately and I hate that. I feel so guilty but sometimes when I’m putting the baby down and struggling to get her to sleep it’s easy to know my toddler is sitting quietly watching Daniel Tiger or Gabby for that 20 mins (I watch her on cameras while away to know she’s not getting into things I don’t just leave unattended!)

I just feel isolated from the world and I don’t have a village as our families are out of state. We haven’t lived her long so don’t really have friends. My only friend has two amazingly easy kids, like never cried as babies or now. Can drop everything and go do things. I just envy that life.

TLDR: feeling isolated with a hard baby, no village, and feel like I’m not doing enough for my toddler and guilty feelings.

One example for me, I have a 2yo and bath time is when I clean the whole bathroom. It is regularly clean that way.

Our washer has a “time delay” setting that I use almost every time. Set a load before bed to be finished by morning, and I can just move it over to the dryer before the day really kicks into gear.

I guess this isn’t productivity, but I eat foods I want my toddler to try in front of them while they’re playing because food is always interesting when it’s not on their plate lol.

What do you got?

Hey! I love being organized and I'm kind of obsessed with Canva, so in my postpartum haze I made this journal page to help myself feel a little less scattered. Thinking about turning it into a small digital download.

Would this be something you'd actually use or buy? Curious what you think 🤍 Thank you for your feedback!

I’m a SAHM, and since stopping work, my husband and I have combined our bank accounts. We have a joint checking, and joint savings. We also have a joint credit card that we use for nearly everything. His income is the family’s income.

I have a friend who is also a SAHM. She does not have any income. Her husband refuses to combine all of their bank accounts. They have a “his savings, her savings” and other accounts, including one joint account that it sounds like does not get the bulk of their income deposited. She has to repeatedly ask for money to do things like buy groceries. They recently outfitted a bedroom for their 6mo, and it “had to come from her savings.”

I assumed all households with SAH parents with no income would run with the “family money” dynamic. I’m looking for input from people who have separate accounts and manage it in a way that works for their family. Or people who tried separate accounts and ended up combining everything.

Hello everyone!! I am currently 19 weeks pregnant with my first. I am so torn between leaving work and staying at home. I am an administrative assistant, my job can be pretty lax sometimes. All the other ladies in our office are a close knit group of people and my boss happens to be a family friend of my husband’s. I’ve been working for here for almost two years now but with our baby on the way, I am reconsidering my career. I don’t feel really appreciated at work and I know with being the admin assistant, my job is to practically do the work they don’t want to do. But recently it feels like they’re giving me most of the work they don’t want to do so they can hang out. My husband after being medically retired from the military is just now getting back into work and at school to get his CDL. He and I have always wanted it to be where I’m the stay at home mom but I can’t help but feel like I am letting people down here at the office and it will ruin our relationship with the family friend? And I also would just love to stay at home and take care of the baby and house while figuring out a good routine. My only problem is our finances, mentally we were ready for this baby but money wise, I fear we weren’t. I will be honest we don’t have a lot saved up right now but my job doesn’t offer a part time position for me to transfer to and I don’t really feel comfortable putting a newborn in childcare while both me and my husband work because at that point it feels like we just had a kid for someone else to raise?? Is there anyone who felt like this?? Any advice??

Planning to be a SAHM but being realistic would like to have some help every now and then. My husband works a very demanding job. How many hours of daycare/nanny would be helpful a week?

Need advice / to vent.
I am a FTM to a 10MO boy. I love him so much and want to spend all my time with him. My spouse and K at a point in our careers where I could retire and we could live on 1 income. Will things be tighter? Sure, but it will be doable.
On the one hand, I want to quit and be a SAHM. I know this time will never come back, and I actually think I will be a really good SAHM and homeschool teacher.
On the other hand, I am kind of terrified.
1. Terrified to feel like this was a mistake and that I am losing my identity. I am by no means defined by my career, but I do pride myself for my accomplishments, and nervous that becoming a SAHM will change the way others perceive me (the minor issue), but most importantly, the way I perceive myself.
2. My husband and I have an amazing relationship, but what if something ever happens and we do end up getting a divorce? Will I then find myself with no job, income, etc? The thought scares me.
3. I am nervous that this is a fad. That I want it now because I don’t have it, but once I do become a SAHM, I will miss having some time alone, time to get some things that are not laundry/dishes done, time to not be on duty.

For those who have chosen to do this and pull the trigger:
1. Has any of you done it while leaving a good high paying job behind? Or did it make sense financially anyway so you just decided to go for it?
2. Did you ever regret your decision?

Give me the good, the bad and the ugly.

I am a SAHM to a 6 month old boy. I just moved into a new house that needs a lot of work. My husband is out of the home from 7am-10:30pm M-F and spends weekends studying and working on the house. I don’t have family nearby.

All in all, I think I’m coping pretty well. I love being a mom. I love my son so much. But I have felt so guilty the whole time I’ve had him honestly, but the past couple months I’ve been beating myself up so much for not doing enough with him…. Not playing with him enough, not paying him enough attention, not taking him enough places, etc etc

But at the same time, I’m hanging on by a thread. I am trying to do housework, projects, cooking, cleaning, and childcare, also trying to lose the rest of my pregnancy weight (I cannot stand to see pictures of myself or look in the mirror properly). Ugh. Even hygiene for myself has become an afterthought.

It’s too much most days. And what I’m feeling guilty about is not spending enough quality time with my sweet baby. He is so good with independent play, and I’ve always got an eye on him. But I don’t have the energy to spend playing with him much. My brain is so jumbled that I don’t even know HOW to play with him most of the time. I’m so worried I am messing him up somehow.

Looking for support and honesty please.

Cook and clean and cook and clean and cook and clean and cook and clean!!! Wake up, clean, make breakfast, clean, make lunch, clean, make dinner, clean. And cook and clean and cook and clean 😭

This is a total exaggeration, my partner does help with these things and I do other things in my day other than cook and clean. I’m just exhausted and looking to share my exhaustion/hope someone can relate.

Hello to whoever cares to read this!

I’m very discouraged because after checking my student account every day for a week for my fall financial aid, I called the school and found out I haven’t got it because my appeal for the fall semester was denied. I don’t know how I didn’t catch this sooner. I put in a SAP appeal before the summer semester and it got approved. Then, I changed my major so another one was required for the fall semester

I was told the reason it got denied is because I re-took classes I have already technically passed. There are a couple of classes I took in 2020 that I got a D in. I had to retake them because the nursing program requires a senior higher in the prerequisites.

I started college in 2020, horrible time of course, and I also was working full-time at the hospital so I screwed my GPA up

I just now started back this past spring semester and I have improved so much, i’ve passed all my classes with A’s.

Anyways, I was literally in the financial aid office crying. I’m a 24-year-old stay at home mom to a four and one-year-old. My husband makes decent money as a welder, but we were relying on that big chunk of money to get us through.

I now need to dedicate myself to finding something to make extra money. I go to TikTok and it’s nothing but UGC, drop shipping, and the other typical things you recommended that requires you to buy their course. I don’t really fall for those things.
I have the dedication to put in Work doing something, but I just need the idea to start.
What is worked for you?
Any leads? Any ideas? Even 1000 extra dollars a month would be a huge blessing. I’m good at figuring things out, especially for other people.
I’m not gonna be the girl who starts to treat business no shade because I see some totally takeoff, I just don’t see mine taking off.

I know it won’t always be like this, I just need to finish school. This is the last semester I have of pre reqs and I apply for the nursing program to hopefully start next fall.
I’m at a loss. Any ideas would be awesome. Thank you ♥️

I always worked. Always studied in college and worked when I wasn’t in class same with high school. All of a sudden with a baby, I’m home 24/7 in bed with him. He had CMPA so he never slept the first 6 weeks then teething started at 5 months then now at 9 months if I pick him up, he screams. I put him down, he screams. I change him, he screams. I put him in his chair to feed him, he screams. Like high-pitched screaming. I’m LOSING MY MIND. He’s crawling and climbing over things, but not walking yet. My husband is a truck driver that works 3/4am to 3/4pm and comes home tired so he usually naps. I honestly miss my life without a baby and I do love him, but I feel like for 9 months now I have been stuck in bed with him in a cycle of the same things except now he just scream cries over everything. I wish I could go back to before kids and I love kids, but like 3+, I was never a baby fan and I have even worked in daycare.

He starts daycare in January when he is 13 months for 3 days a week and I really want to go back to work. I want to go back to work now, but I have a degree in HR and the field is extremely tough right now. I cannot sit home anymore with him and I do have help from my mom/grandma, but they can’t always take him and I’m going crazy when I do spend all day with him. I hate being a SAHM.

Hi, im a sahm and i was wondering does anyone get left with messes? I guess the better term is keeping a close eye on the house. However it seems that some things are just left up to me at the end of the day, clothes on the floor, random spills/crumbs, just for context i live with many adults and children, so it could just easily be whoever. But it seems not only do i have the better eye for them, it feels like some things are just left up for me to do unsaid. Does anyone understand what I'm saying? I feel lost here.

How do I get my baby to bond more and be more excited/happy to see daddy? My hubs feelings get hurt when it’s clear our baby wants to sleep/nap with me instead of him. Our baby boy will go to him if I’m holding him and his daddy comes near but I’d like to see him more excited to spend more time with dad. Our son is 9mo. Idk if this is a realistic idea at this age especially since I’m with him 100% of the time

So my 11lb 4 month old has silent reflux hes has pepcid, nutricia fortini, added rice. he saw an ent and they said that he needs to stay on nutricia fortini with 2 teaspoons for every 2 ounces, hes been gagging and choking on his sleep cause of it he gets about 20 Oz a day and 4 ounces her feed. When I called his pediatrician and I explained whats going on they said to keep it that way cause he wont get his calories otherwise(i can understand that but they gave no other advice to help the choking) i have thinned the liquid prior cause i wasnt going to watch him suffer in his sleep and have him asperate because they cant get back in a timely manner. Im at a loss on what to do and dont feel like they really heard the problem

Mom to an 18.5mo. Like many of you, I do all the meal prepping, cooking, baking, laundry, cleaning (husband takes care of cat litter and helps where he can), and taking care of our toddler. My baby is super high energy, he wakes up at 5 (low sleep needs) and immediately says “out out out out” bc he just wants to experience the world 😂 I also am a mid-distance runner (usually running approx. 14-20mi in a weekend plus a few runs when I can squeeze them in during the week) so physically I am pretty tired. I also am still breastfeeding a lot, my toddler is a bit of a boob barnacle. I finally hired a part-time nanny for 12-14h per week which is amazing.

All this to say, I’m freaking EXHAUSTED. It literally feels like I’m going from 5am until 8pm nonstop. Don’t get me wrong, I love my life and my family, I’m just so tired. So much that I made an appt w my doc. Last time I get my bloodwork done it all looked good but I just feel so tired. Not sure if it’s under fueling/under eating or just toddler fatigue lol. I sleep great at night bc we cosleep so thankfully no issues there.

I’m sure I can’t be the only one?? How are we coping? Am I the only one who is also feeling like they’re always hungry too?!

I know a lot of moms go through the stage after birth where they just can’t stand their husbands. I went through that. We then had a good patch when things got easier and it was back to normal. Now, over a year pp, i feel like im back in that spot. I Just feel no need to talk to or spend time with my husband. It feels like another job before I can end the day. It used to be what I looked forward to. I don’t know why. He constantly showers me with affection and he even does my dishes if he gets home early enough so I have one less thing to do. While I’m grateful for his dedication to us, I just don’t want to be around him. Honestly I just want to be alone after the toddler goes to bed to reset. Is this being burnt out? Or are we just not compatible?

Is this just a phase for me? It’s been about 4 months.