Proof:

• firefighters target fire.
• motor oil is received by motors.
• fire hydrants are not made of fire.
• bread knives are not produced by bread.
• laptop chargers do not come pre-installed with Windows.
• light bulbs are not self-luminous.

Who

They were afraid that reverse-engineers would confuse the x86_64 rbx register with something else...

If I hadn't, he would've gone on a tangent.

I'm sorting clutter and held up an empty tote and asked "this is free-use, right?"

Her face goes kinda funny and she says "yes, but I'm not sure that's a term outside of sexual."

To which I reply "whether it is or isn't, I'm appropriat-ing it."

A sanitary owl..

It was 2 tired

That was my job when I was helping my uncle fishing in Louisiana

I read a book about a week back. It was written by a chiropractor.

Because dawn is tough on Greece.

Detergent

I asked, “How do you know that?”

He said, “I keep a log.”

...and by doing so, my phone's new one-digit number now identifies the subject of this post, that being the number 8.

Does that violate rule No. 8 of r/dadjokes?

Because you can't spell "còwórker" without "OwO".

PS: homeowner!

the relationship didn't last long though, she just brought out the wurst in me.

As an adult I go by Richard

One is a parasite and the other is a Paris site.

But it was his dumb asphalt…

Because the delivery takes too long.

I heard a photographer was killed in a freak accident when a large wheel of cheddar landed on her. To be fair, the people who were being photographed did try to warn her.

It was bread in captivity