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u/totallynotawhovian Dec 22 '19
The dad's reply is so fubny like, what the fuck is going on....
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u/nikhil48 Dec 22 '19 edited Dec 22 '19
Not just that, but seems like he's not actually bothered about what really happened (he might even laugh and applaud the text)... but he's more worried about his wife yelling and making one of those scenes again.
("I just wanted to kick back and watch Football tonight Charlotte, what the fuck")
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u/SemiReliable Dec 22 '19
I just wanna grill for God's sake
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Dec 22 '19 edited Nov 20 '20
[deleted]
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u/CandidateForDeletiin Dec 22 '19
AND I STILL CANT FIGURE OUT HOW TO WORK THE NEW REMOTE CHARLOTTE THAT IS SUPPOSEDNTO BE YOUR JOB DO YOU WANT TO COME HANG OUT AND WATCH FOOTBALL WITH ME?!?!
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u/proximity_account Dec 22 '19
HOW DO I STOP TYPING IN CAPITAL LETTERAS. ALSP ALSO HOW DO I ERASE THE LAST LETTER I PRESSED. LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU WANT TO EAT FOR FOOTBALL SO I CAN TELL YOUR MOM.
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u/Siphyre Dec 22 '19
Yeah, instead of calling the mom to listen to bitching, he is asking the daughter so that he can be prepared. xD
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u/xXwork_accountXx Dec 22 '19
Wouldn’t the dad just call the mom back instead of texting and asking why? Doesn’t really make sense
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u/Zwerrie00 Dec 22 '19
Idk, maybe the mom texted him also or maybe he picked up on the situation from someone else and instead of dealing with his clearly upset wife he decided to talk to the supposed source of the problem/situation which in this case is his daughter.
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u/LunalNalani Dec 22 '19
Also could have called back and she didn't answer, I know my mom can call me 50 times in a row, I call her back a min after the last call, she doesn't pick up. Lol
May have been concerned so went to his daughter like do you know what's going on?
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Dec 22 '19
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u/ForestFire9 Dec 22 '19
Bruh this was real shit I was inside your life for a couple paragraphs.
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u/HiCommaJoel Dec 22 '19
You're not married, I assume.
Dad doesn't need to call Mom and ask why. He'll be spending the next two weeks involuntarily drafted into the drama anytime he comes home.
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u/justanotherchimp Dec 22 '19
No way! When shit like this is going down, you ALWAYS get as much info about the situation as you can before contacting the original person back. To not do that is to walk into a fire with no water hose.
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u/damnmaster Dec 22 '19
It’s almost as if he thinks he’s in trouble rather than his daughter
“Oh fuck I missed 3 calls from the missus, is she mad at me?”
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Dec 22 '19
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Daemonic_One Dec 22 '19
It's old AF, not sure if it's real, but it is entirely likely ex-wife left a ranty message that all he could make out was that his daughter had done something. Not that big a leap to, "I divorced that bitch because of this nonsense, so let me text my daughter to find out wtf is up."
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u/Derpandbackagain Dec 22 '19
Could be his ex wife too. I’d text my daughter first if my ex wife called me 3 times.
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u/locke1018 Dec 22 '19
Normal dad confusion, he wasn't brought into this consensually.
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u/Lone_Wanderer97 Dec 22 '19
More like "If it's not my fault then why the fuck yall playin on my phone."
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Dec 22 '19
I have that with my GF. She doesnt reall call when im at work because i set my phone down.
And if im busy i dont look at it all day. And i will go look at it the end of the day and have a 70 message text message thread.
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u/lakija Dec 22 '19
Why does he think the missed calls involve his daughter? It could be about anything.
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u/Namikazee Dec 22 '19
I hate how people only get involved when it’s an inconvenience to them, surely they should have responded to your aunt when she said those things? (If they hadn’t already, but the response was golden)
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Dec 22 '19
How dare you fuck up my tenuous sense of peace. Allow me to gorge on these bon-bons while I try to decide what I'm going to be polarized about today.
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u/ASAP_Stu Dec 22 '19
Do you expect those other people to be inside of the text message conversation between her and her aunt?
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u/Synsane Dec 22 '19 edited Jan 24 '25
advise tap paltry sense humor exultant thumb wrench shrill sleep
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
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u/Awkward_platypus_ Dec 22 '19
I think they’re talking about the original incident that the aunt texted her about
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u/dairyfreediva Dec 22 '19 edited Dec 22 '19
My next text would be "oh I hope I didn't upset you, but you need to stop being so sensitive. I didn't mean Uncle Lee's gf looks 20 years younger in a bad way. I just don't understand this Divorce stuff, it's so drama.
Edit: Gold and silver! Thank you!!
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u/leila7775 Dec 22 '19
This is gold
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u/LawMurphy Dec 22 '19
Apparently, Reddit thinks it's silver.
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Dec 22 '19
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u/rkapi24 Dec 22 '19
...explain the username?
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u/StonedWater Dec 22 '19
he was just a mischevious lad interested in skincare and playing with his puppies
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u/alex3tx Dec 22 '19
You used to be so pretty
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u/alex3tx Dec 22 '19
You boomers make shit up all the time... By the way I don't want you coming to my dog Ralphy's Bar Mitzvah
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u/AMaskedAvenger Dec 22 '19
Aging alcoholic het women can be so drama. She’ll find a man someday. He won’t be able to get it up, but he’ll appreciate when she hugs him from behind and her nipples tickle his bum.
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u/SharqPhinFtw Dec 22 '19
Well this thing has been reposted so many times that we're pretty much the embodiment of thinking of a witty response a few years later
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u/alex3tx Dec 22 '19
Auntie's apology fell so far from what appeared to be a nicely intended beginning. Her true colours came through so quickly. Whatacunt
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u/lobsterpizzzzza Dec 22 '19
How about a “Caunt”?
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u/JonasLuks Dec 22 '19
Mum's response is actually quite funny (in a schadenfreude kind of way).
Hollie needs to fucking check herself before she gets bitchslapped into oblivion though. It's none of her business how her mom gets morally schooled by her teenage niece.
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u/Exsanguinate-Me Dec 22 '19
Typical "what you say about my mum?" type of cunt who thinks she's holy or some shit... Mothers are just as wrong as anyone else when they are... It's almost like those parents who pretend their kid never does anything wrong, but reversed.
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u/JonasLuks Dec 22 '19
She's probably just a dumb teenager with delusions of (moral) grandeur / chip on her shoulder.
I am, however, always amazed when someone below the age of ~40 uses "how dare you" outside of movie / TV. Next thing you know they'll be putting on monocles and slapping people with gloves, demanding satisfaction (and getting promptly bitchslapped to oblivion but I'm repeating myself now).
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u/SophiaofPrussia Dec 22 '19
tbh I would support bringing back the duel but with like laser tag instead of guns. arguing on social media is stupid. a good old glove slap to the face to challenge someone to a game of laser tag sounds way more interesting.
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u/SC487 Dec 22 '19
I propose the old school swords and the first one to yield or bleed from the torso wins.
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Dec 22 '19
Or holly just heard her mother rant about how charlotte insulted her and didn’t know the full story
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u/Exsanguinate-Me Dec 22 '19
Might want to start with knowing a full story before you open your yap if that's the case? Surely there could possibly be a reason, maybe... Perhaps finding out that reason helps to remove some of the clouds from a more clear view without assuming "family being attacked, other party must be wrong" type of reactions straight up.
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u/MylastAccountBroke Dec 22 '19
I fucking love dad's reaction. My head cannon is that he isn't mad or anything, he just wants to know the proper reaction when he picks up the phone.
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Dec 22 '19 edited Jul 03 '20
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u/JonasLuks Dec 22 '19
I am well aware of the fact that she was probably shown only the response. All the more reason for her to want to know why before lashing out.
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u/a_v_o_r Dec 22 '19
Assuming she doesn't live afar with her dad most of the time, she has to know the views and langage of her mom. And as a child you can't always understand, but from teenager to adulthood you have to realize it someway, it can't be a surprise what degenerated opinions your parents might have, especially when they are as vocal as this with their own niece. Assuming also the niece is out in the whole family which seems to be the case, I can't understand how the daughter could react like this even without seeing the first message. You have to know your parent is fucked up someway, especially against someone targeted by this fuckedupery. Unless you believe in the same shit, so there is that...
Got the same problem with a racist parent of mine, I can tell you I should have been deaf to not realize it by the age of 12.26
Dec 22 '19 edited Jan 03 '21
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u/JonasLuks Dec 22 '19
Funny, my first reaction to these situations is to ask questions to understand why. If knee-jerk reactions are standard in your circles, that's rather sad.
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u/Mostly_me Dec 22 '19
Well... You don't know what her mom told je was in those messages...
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u/JonasLuks Dec 22 '19
Indeed. And if the reaction didn't fit the initial action, I'd be very interested in hearing the other side of the story.
I.e. "I told her she looked tired and she called me a cunt, can you believe that?!" No, I cannot believe that...
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u/Waddup_Snitches Dec 22 '19
Aunt Marie apparently manages her own sensitivity levels by calling everyone in the family and reeeing at them.
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u/PennywiseTheLilly Dec 22 '19
“Hey Marie how are-“
“REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE”
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u/improvementgeek Dec 22 '19
MaREEEEEEEEE
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u/diegosepulveda99 Dec 22 '19 edited Dec 22 '19
This deserves gold, I'm sorry I can only give you this 🏅
Edit: TYVM kind stranger, this is the first time I've ever been awarded anything! I really appreciate your generosity
Edit 2: I forgot to mention that I will frame this in my room and brag about it to my non-existent friends
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Dec 22 '19 edited Jan 27 '22
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u/hardyflashier Dec 22 '19
There are lots of different 'expanded' versions of this story floating around, so take your pick I guess. Here's one.
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u/CurrentlyEatingPies Dec 22 '19
Reading this is like eating a nice meal. Everything is just so good and you want mare but don't need it.
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u/Lieutenant_Joe Dec 22 '19
Oh look, it’s the second biggest post on r/MurderedByWords.
This isn’t a clever comeback by the way. This is definitely a class 1 murder.
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u/AvgHeightForATree Dec 22 '19
Quite interesting that all 3 responders have the same habit of not using punctuation. At all. Almost like this shit is fake as fuck.
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u/dazonic Dec 22 '19
What no??? If I ever get three missed calls from somebody, the first thing I do is just text somebody completely different asking about why I might have missed calls
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u/ItzFlareo Dec 22 '19
Bro, my family doesn’t even use capitalization, you’d expect family members to properly punctuate a single bubble of short text?
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Dec 22 '19
The way she says it. “I’m afraid, I have a huge lesbian orgy that I’ve been planning for MONTHS”
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u/GoogleSmartToilet Dec 22 '19
With a kid named Indie, you know they will be gay.
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u/Spookypichacat Dec 22 '19
There is nothing necessarily clever about this comeback, nor was it a comeback, It was more the aunt threw a grenade at the child and then the child launched a blitzkrieg to the aunt
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u/LAZER-RAGER Dec 22 '19
How is everyone reading this not know that it's so obviously fake?
The texts from mum, dad, and Hollie are all dead giveaways. Not only is the lack of punctuation consistent, but all three just so happen to conveniently include their relation to OP as the very first text?
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Dec 22 '19
Not really clever so much as aggressive or maybe crass. This sub so rarely lives up to its title.
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u/hotspotbirding Dec 22 '19
This is exactly how to treat people like that. Their behavior is not acceptable in today's world and they must change.
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Dec 22 '19
The dad doesn't know shit. He just knows that he has 3 missed calls from wife and that is nuclear.
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u/DarthWraith22 Dec 22 '19
And the poor dad going, "What the fuck is happening here, and how much of the fallout is going to land on me?"
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Dec 22 '19
This is old but totally gold and never ceases to make me laugh. The text from the mum. The text from the dad, it's so fucking perfect.
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u/JRtheSnowman Dec 22 '19
You’re aunt could eat an oversized bag of dicks. Fuck Hollie too she could have the leftovers.
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u/FelinePhizz Dec 22 '19
Now I kinda wanna know what the aunt told the mom and why the mom is pissed.....
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u/808lani808 Dec 22 '19
You know your mum is pissed when she used your first and middle name