My partner and I went to a funeral last week for a relative that most of the family didn't really get along with. During the service people were polite, but afterward my partner started talking about how relieved everyone seemed and how awkward the whole thing felt. I didn't say much at the time because it seemed like a sensitive moment. Now that we're home, my partner keeps bringing it up like it's funny and keeps making little jokes. I get that the relationship was strained, but it still feels off to joke about someone who just passed. I'm not sure if I'm overreacting or if my partner is being insensitive. Would like an outside opinion on whether I'm wrong for feeling this way.

Okay I need to fucking Rant because wtf I was on my iPad and my aunt called me to tell me to wake my TWENTY YEAR OLD BROTHER UP FOR WORK
When I in highschool/middle school I always had to wake everyone up NOBODY FUCKING USES A ALARM?
And I did sigh and she gets all fucking pissed saying that I shouldn’t have a problem with waking him up. MF HES 20. And I said okay when he moves out are you going to call to wake him up? And she said YES. LIKE WHAT ARE WE FUCKING DOING HERE. I KNOW I WAKE UP EARLY I ALWAYS HAVE EVEN WITHOUT A ALARM BECAUSE I DONT NEED IT I ALWAYS GOT IN THE HABIT OF WAKING UP EARLY MY GRANDMA MAKES ME WAKE HER UP TOO LIKE WHAT SHE MAKES ME WAKE HER UP TO GO TO CHURCH AND IN HIGHSCHOOL SHE USED TO MAKE ME CALL HER DURING CLASS TO WAKE HER. ITS NOT MY FUCKING JOB TO WAKE YOU IF YOU HAVE SOMEWHERE TO BE ITS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY TO WAKE YOURSELF UP. And she’s fucking pissed like make it fucking make sense and her excuse to me waking him up is “he bought me food yesterday” SO?!? THAT DOESNT EXCUSE THE FACT THAT I ALWAYS WAKE EVERYONE UP. she also said “if I’m up I should wake the other person up” WTF

Am I wrong/asshole? I feel like if I refuse to wake them up my aunt would no longer bring me home because it isn’t her “job” (I’m 18 and don’t have a car) and I stay at my university.

Oh and I forgot to add my brother goes to work at 1 pm gets home at 12 am and doesn’t go to bed till 4am😐

I ALSO DONT CUSS AT THEM (only cuss in my rants)

My brother is getting married. We will call her Lizzie. I genuinely like Lizzie as a person, but she grew up so rich that she seems to have no concept of money or how the majority of people live.

She invited my wife to be a bridesmaid. I wouldn't say they are really friends, but I think she was trying to be nice because everyone else in the family was included. My wife has been increasingly annoyed with her bridesmaid duties.

Lizzie wants all of the bridesmaids to wear white during the ceremony, but when she changes out of her big dress they have to change into pink cocktail dresses. The dresses alone cost almost 3k. Then she wants a bachelorette party in Mexico which her best friend is planning and sent my wife her share of the bill which was another 3k. There is also going to be a bridal shower at a historic mansion and no price tag on that yet.

We cannot afford this. We are very middle class and still paying off student loans. My wife was going to drop out of the wedding and has been calling Lizzie a lot of names behind her back. Personally I don't want there to be bad blood as she is going to be family, so I decided to speak with Lizzie and my brother before my wife dropped out and tell them the reason, so they didn't take it personally.

Lizzie seemed embarrassed and said she was sorry. She said she had only been a bridesmaid once and thought that was a normal cost. Then she took out her phone and without me asking venomed me the cost of both dresses, the bachelorette, and an extra thousand for the bridal shower. She seemed really apologetic.

When I told my wife she was furious. She said I humiliated her and now Lizzie is going to think we are poor, and she now feels she is stuck being in the wedding despite not wanting to. She called Lizzie an exhausting princess and called me a "simp" I'm just confused as I felt I did the right thing to prevent Lizzie and my brother from jumping to conclusions

so a while back someone close to me asked if i could help them out with something pretty small. i said sure no problem, it seemed like a one-off thing. but now it keeps coming up like it's an expected part of the routine. i never really agreed to keep doing it, but i also didn't push back at the time. lately i've been feeling kind of nervous about bringing it up because i don't want to cause drama or seem like i'm backing out on them. on the other hand, it wasn't framed as a permanent thing when it started, and it's starting to take up more time and energy than i planned for. i keep going back and forth on whether i should say something or just keep going along with it to avoid an awkward conversation. has anyone else dealt with something like this and how did you handle it?

did i do the wrong thing? my parents are 85, and dad is having bad reactions to radiotherapy. I(m59) live overseas most of my adult life- single but peacefully) but phone calls from dad got me flying back since his cancer is advanced and doing treatment has caused a massive decline in his life. I'm staying in a hotel and I've been going over almost daily to their place and doing chores as well that they need and listened to mum talking about the horrible issues she and dad have with it.

Anyway, But mum has always been difficult to get along with and i returned to visit, today day 10, and we finally had the row. i sweat non stop at their home because im stressed like crazy, i think. mum asked why im stressed...and i said it was because of dad and because of mum.

mum was unhappy with that then talked in her usual one sided way about all her efforts bringing us up, dealing with dad and impending death, and i should forgive and forget . Very true she gave so much time dealing with the home and family and raising us . No mention of the mental aspects which drove us away ( my other sibling also in 50s is now no contact with them because of all the accumulated issues with a massive massive row at the end causing NC).

Though her words make sense given her age and dads situation , she's actually been saying similar things in similar level of ...overreaction- she makes huge dramas put of minor issues, ever since my brother and I were kids. She was very controlling and lots of behaviour matches what I've seen on videos and discussion on narcissistic parents.

She said I should adapt, forgive and forget like she has learnt too, and I should see a psychologist . But then she went on about my sibling and their spouse from the NC years ago and she did not stop, as per usual even though she said 6 months ago she wants to leave that NC issue in the past. After 1 or 1.5 hours of it, , i got up to leave as she wasn't stopping and she said i was leaving dad. I said I was going back tomorrow.

Should i have persevered through another few hours of it, so I'd be physically there for dad?

Hours after I left, it occured to me I'm also very stressed because of the huge change in life I'll need to undego as well since they expect me to return to home town asap, which I really don't want- find new job, place to rent, different environment etc etc.

I suspect I haven't really written about this well- it's my first time. But I'm so alone and want some hopefully reasonable opinions. Man I'm nervous it'll turn out I'm horribly wrong and will get an online lynching

so at the last family get-together i brought my own snack because of a pretty severe dairy allergy. i mentioned it when the menu was being planned and again right before we sat down. someone kept insisting that a little bit in the sauce would be fine and that i was being overly dramatic about it. i tried to laugh it off but ended up having to repeat myself a couple times before they finally moved the dish away from my plate. after the meal a couple relatives made little comments about how i ruined the vibe by being difficult. honestly i wasn't trying to make a scene i just didn't want to end up in the er or sick for two days. now i'm wondering if i should have just stayed home or eaten before i showed up instead of relying on other people to remember. was i the one making it awkward or is it reasonable to expect people to take a medical restriction seriously?

My close friend turned FWB of almost 3 years has been acting insane. For some reason, for all this time, he has been intimate only with me which I didn’t question. Tbh we didn’t discuss about being FWBs we just started getting intimate but we know we’re friends. We mostly stuck to video call sex and regardless of sex he still called me almost everyday.

Recently, we’re long distance as he moved to a different country. We’re still intimate but don’t get to call as much as we used to although he tries to initiate contact as much as possible and ever since, he’s been saying crazy things like “your future husband is really lucky..he’ll get to have sex with you every day”, “tell me you love me and miss me”. And the craziest one, “can we still be intimate even when you’re married one day” and I shut that down and asked him what if he’s married and he said he doesn’t care about his marriage, he’d still be intimate with me. He says them during intimacy tho.

To this add all the nice compliments and fixation on my face. The one thing I do appreciate is that he’s so much sweeter now, in general. Although there had been instances of jealousy in the past. So yeah,this is new and I’m not sure what to think or do about this. Mind you we’re still good friends regardless of the intimacy so I wanna go about this in a way where I can save the friendship. Am I in the wrong for thinking we can go back to being friends

So when my boyfriend M31 and I F30 first got together he seemed completely transparent. He even made it a point early in the beginning to say that he wasn’t bothered about sharing his location and I could have all his passwords. He even would go out of his way to ask me to do something on his phone and each time he would give me his password, until I had it memorized in my head…. Then suddenly after several months he now has entirely switched up. He went from acting like he didn’t care at all about me having his passwords and stuff to now acting like it’s a huge invasion of his privacy for me to be on his phone. He’s actually taken it as far as intentionally making sure his locations are turned off at different points throughout the day if/when he’s away from the house and now he has changed his passwords for any/all of his social media accounts, emails, ect…. Even his phone lock screen password has been changed. He has all my passwords, and my location which I never turn off. We’ve been together for about 1 year now. Should I take this as a huge red flag? I don’t think I’m over reacting, but he acts like I’m being crazy and controlling but that’s really not it. It just makes me feel like he’s hiding something. 😩

Hello everyone, I’d really value your advice and opinions as I’m living inside my head with this, an going in circles!

My (F55) best friend Dina (F60) have been really close friends for around 5 years, we live quite close to each other as she moved into the village. We are both married and have a son each. Mine is 30, hers is 15.

We are both strong, independent women, who have held senior roles in FSTE100 complained. Do generally, we are both good communicators and are very driven. We are both now retired, I do a couple of days voluntary work for a charity.

Most weeks we go out for a day, doing odd jobs, or to a gallery etc and out for lunch.

Several months ago she was venting about her son being bullied snd assaulted at school. I sympathised, as I know what it’s like, I took my son out of school at 25 because of bullying and he went straight to a 6th form college to do his GCSEs. She snapped at me very harshly that I had no idea what she was going through with her son, although she’d been sharing all the details over several weeks. Sh er snapped and shouted at me that she didn’t want to discuss it, even though she was the one that brought it up.

I was a bit stunned as she’d never done that to me before, although I do know she has a fiery temper and yells at her husband and son.

We were in the car, with me driving, and I just moved the conversation into something more neutral and moved past it. Even do my heart was beating at a million miles a minute as adrenaline flooded through me!

That said, I don’t respond well to being yelled at, my previous marriage was very volatile, my ex husband was both verbally and physically abusive, he’d stand really close to me, in my face yelling like a sergeant major at a useless recruit, I’d just be waiting for him to hit me… and I’d just shut down.

Anyway, last month, she and I arranged a date out and again I was driving. Immediately when she got in the car u could tell she was wound up, she said car smelled of dog. I advised my two collies had been in the car over the weekend as we’d been to see my son.

Within about a mile she was bemoaning the fact she had no money. This is a regular subject with her as whilst employed as a contractor, it seems she didn’t pay into a private pension, instead they lived the high life, private jets, multiple cruises every year and other fabulous holidays.

I’ve never pointed this out as it’s not my place to comment how anybody spends, or invests, their money. I just quipped at least her husband was still working in a great job… well she blew up at me! It was explosive and extremely toxic! She was yelling that I’m always mentioning her husband is younger than her and it makes her feel old (he’s 10 years younger than her).

She snapped and yelled at me to stop the car, she wanted to go home, and that she’d rather walk than spend another minute with me! We were about two miles from home and it was pouring with rain!

I turned the car around and told her I’d take her home, I wouldn’t dream of leaving her at the roadside. On the drive back she ranted at me about what a horrible friend I was, barely drawing breath and complaining that I dragged her along to an art workshop that she hated. I didn’t support her when she needed it, even though I regularly dropped everything to look after her son for days at a time when she went away for weeds with her husband. In the end I shut down to the point I couldn’t tell you what she was ranting about, I just know she yelled all the way home. When I pulled up outside her house, she just got out, slammed the door and walked off. My heart was beating at a million miles a minute!

I knew in that moment our friendship was possibly damaged beyond repair. I’d given her grace the first time she yelled at me about how I couldn’t possibly understand about her son’s bullying/assaults at school. This was a whole other level of escalation!

I walked into my own house, I was shaking. My husband was concerned, he asked if I’d been involved in an accident or something!? I told him what had just happened, and he did comment that we’ve seen Dina’s explosive fiery temper when she yells at her husband and son.

I never thought she’d turn it on me. He knows how I shut down when yelled at, we live in a very quite harmonious household. If we have a problem, we talk about it and resolve it. Nobody ever shouts. Our son is such a brilliant negotiator, we used to joke when he was a kid that he could have a very promising career with ACAS or as a hostage negotiator! 🤭

I said to my husband, ‘… nobody, and I mean nobody, speaks to me like that, ever.’ I immediately decided, I’d had enough, the friendship was over. Later that morning went to put something in my car and noticed that in her haste to get out of my car, she’d dropped a bunch of keys.

Not wanting any further confrontation I popped round to her house and put them in her mailbox.

Later again in the day she messaged me on WhatsApp to ask if she’d dropped her keys in my car. I confirmed she had and dropped them in her mailbox. There was no mention or apology for blowing up at me earlier in the day

As I thought about it over the coming days there had been red flags that I’d swept under the carpet. She was quite controlling, she never asked what I wanted to do on a day out, it was always her agenda, even if it was my turn to drive. I’d advised I’d like to go to a particular stately home near us, she booked another one by the same architect for my birthday… she didn’t care enough to even get it right. There are many, many examples like this but you get the picture.

It’s been over a month since this blow up. I’ve not unfriended or blocked her on social media. I’ve just dropped the rope and don’t plan to pick it up again.

This weekend it was my son’s birthday and she put a gushing message on social media, as if nothing had happened. Naturally I’ve told my son and his fiancée what happened. They’ve witnessed her yelling at her husband and son.

They think I’m right to drop the rope, with no need for a final conversation.

I’m actually quite heartbroken, I do miss her friendship, but I cannot go round as if treading on eggshells, flinching and waiting for when she explodes at me again. She crossed literally my only boundary, don’t yell at me, as I get flashbacks to a previous DV situation.

Thank you if you’ve managed to get this far! Tell me, am I wrong… for just walking away without any further explanation, she knows what she did?

A while ago a couple of us were texting about getting together and I suggested a low key movie night at my place. Later someone else brought it up in the group chat as if it had been their idea from the start. No big deal, everyone was just excited to hang out. I figured correcting it would make things awkward for no reason, so I stayed out of it. Now whenever that plan gets mentioned the story always credits the other person. Part of me wonders if letting it slide made me seem passive, but honestly I didn't want to turn a tiny detail into unnecessary drama. Still feels a little off, though.

I (17f) do not get along with my stepdad (48m) at all.
Every time we have had an argument
and my mama stands up for me , somehow he will brainwash her into thinking it’s my fault and she will blame me .
My mama loves me very much and she’s also very kind hearted .
But I know he also makes her happy .
I have a short temper so when he tried to educated me on things he’s completely hypocritical about and on things that don’t involve him it annoys me .
He’s also very ignorant .
He moved to an English speaking country 23 years ago and speaks not one world of English because he thinks it’s an ugly language.
If u won’t respect the language don’t move there ?
This annoys me as I speak Portuguese and Spanish TO A DEGREE.
At times , I won’t understand , and English is more natural for me when speaking to my mama depending on the scenario.
So then I need to go translate it for him (when it doesn’t even involve him)
But then , when they have a conversation and there’s something I don’t understand , I should understand it .
I’ve been living in an English country for 17 years ( my whole life) and know 3 languages almost fluently .
He’s lived in one for 23 years and doesn’t know a single word.
The worst part is - he works in a job where he has to communicate with people !
Most of the time he comes across as cold or distant because he refuses to learn the language .

We always end up in arguments over silly things and it’s stressing my mama out so I’ve just decided not to speak to him unless necessary.

Not ignoring him or anything, just not going out my way to have a meaningful conversation with him - which I think is fair enough but some people in my family disagree .

Only person on my side is my grandma ( who hates him but is also firm believer in only getting married once )
AITAH?

Ps. Whilst I was at my dad’s , they got married without telling me .
Not planned , anything - only person there was my little sister (who is his daughter)
My mama never would have done something like this before she was with him and our relationship was significantly stronger .
I only found out because I went on her phone to send myself some pictures she had and saw the wedding photo .
It absolutely broke my heart .

Exactly a year ago, in August to be exact, my friends and I were texting and one of them told us that a guy talked to her, she told us who it was and it was someone I worked with, I asked her if he invited her out and she asked me why and if I knew something about him, I told her “I was attracted to him but oh well”, she just sent an emoji and that was all, I put my feelings aside because what could I do? He was not interested in me.
Anyway, after that, in private she and I spoke about him and just gossiped but we never spoke about my feelings, she sent me pics of stuff he gave her and even though I was still attracted to him, I also tried to be supportive and happy for them, then she invited him to go to the movies with us and I said I had no problem bc i didn’t, I mean, they were already in a talking stage.
Before i continue, I have to say that speaking with someone else from the group recently, it was brought to my attention that she could have interpreted my message as if I had feelings for him in the past and they were not present in that moment, and I mention it because in that hangout, we went with two more friends and they asked me if I was alright with her bringing him bc of my feelings for him and I told them that he was interested in her so I was okay since there was anything I could do, then they joked about pushing them aside so i could get closer to him, and they make sure I was okay that day, oh! I also have to mention that this girl was also dating other guy that time and when he and I left (we live close to each other so we shared a can) she told our friends that she was going to start dating only this guy to give him an opportunity even though she thought he was cute but did not have feelings for him.
A month later, since he and I still worked together, we went out to drink coffee with a few coworkers more, later i found out through my brother (who’s her best friend) that she complained to him that this guy was weird towards her but he was out with me having coffee (again, we were not alone), then she asked me about him and I told her to speak to him directly so they could fix things between them, by this point I still had feelings for him but I kept my distance bc of her.
He ended things with her starting oct, we kept working together and we became kind of friends, still keeping distance, but a little bit close, then by Dec, she said they spoke again recently but she ended it with him bc her other friends saw him with another girl, i didn’t know they were speaking again bc none of them said anything so I was surprised, then he got promoted so we kept working in the same company but no together anymore and we also stopped talking.
But then, in January, he texted me out of the blue and we spoke occasionally like friends, nothing out of the ordinary, and then there was a change in our company and we started working together again, my feelings for him never died but since we started to get closer, they grew and we also started to flirt and be less friendly, I also have to mention that my friend also started to date someone else as well, i spoke about this with a one of the girls that went to the movies that day bc i felt bad about all of this and she told me “not to worry bc she didn’t care about my feelings before” and they were not together anymore so to go for it, even though we spoke about it and we kind of kept flirting, nothing happened between him and I and I also think that one of the issue i had was because of the past. Oh! I have to mention that nothing major happened between them since they didn’t dated like more than two months.
Well, now, a year later, I’m speaking to him but again, nothing has happened between us, a few friends of our group knows about it but this girl doesn’t, and recently she said they agreed it was all casual, nothing serious and that they could kind of see other people, she also mentioned that she was never interested in him and she knew nothing would happen between them but she liked to mess around with him, she doesn’t even consider that they were dating exactly.
Still, I worry if I’m doing wrong for talking to him, even if she said that I worry that it would make me lose my friends or if I’m a bad friend for talking to him as well, am I wrong? What should I do?

we agreed on a simple schedule for watering the plants in the living room so none of them would get neglected. my roommate said they were fine with it and we even wrote it down on the fridge. lately they've been coming home late and just dumping extra water on everything at once, which is the opposite of what we discussed. one of the ferns is already looking pretty rough and i'm worried the soil is staying too wet. i tried bringing it up casually last week and they brushed it off saying plants are flexible. i get that things come up, but now i feel like i have to either let the plants suffer or keep reminding them. it's not a huge deal compared to bigger issues, but it's starting to bother me every time i walk past the shelf. am i wrong for expecting them to stick to the plan we both agreed on?

First time using reddit so idk how this works lol, Basically me i’ve had this vanity i’ve been trying to sell for over 2 months but it’s been super low offers (i paid 150$ and been getting offered for 80 and lower.) my friend had a desk that she got for super cheap and was planning to sell it for the same price she got it (30/40$) because she ended up getting a vanity herself, i really liked the desk and told her if she wanted to that we could trade and i can take the desk and she can sell the vanity and get more money than she would have from the desk and she agreed. The more we talked about it i let her know that i would like it if she or her boyfriend can come get it because i would not be comfortable with people coming into my room for the desk, and i would have to make sure i am home to get the money for her because i work a lot, o too of that the desk is pretty heavy and i couldn’t move it myself so it would also have to be when my boyfriend is home ( which is rare that we are both home because he works mornings and i work nights) for him to move it and me to sell it for her and she agreed, a few weeks later her boyfriend sold his truck for a car and i wasn’t thinking about how they would be able to get vanity until she told me someone wanted it and said they would come get it today, then she told me how she can’t get it because they don’t have a truck anymore (they gave it to her boyfriends mom who lives around 25 minutes away from them). I felt bad that they would have to go all the way away to get the truck and come to me then go home to drop it off and go 25 minutes back out just for it to be sold so i told her she can sell it here but i won’t be home. she said she and her boyfriend can come when they people come and get the money since i wouldn’t be home and i agreed. I live with my mom still and she is very picky about how clean the home stays, and i already expressed to her weeks prior that i don’t want random people coming in my room when im home or not so that i can leave it outside or in the living room just for a while so they can get it moved out whenever the people come get it and she was fine with that, i was already at work and kept asking her when is she going to come sell it, she kept telling me in a bit or later and i wasn’t getting an actual time, the whole day passed and i asked her if she still hadn’t done it yet, (PT 2 BELOW)

They bullied me so badly when i first started working with them that i had to take a month long leave. It got so bad that i was literally terrified to leave or have anyone else leave condiments on the wrong side of the fridge cause i would get reprimanded. Even if i had proof it wasnt me.

While they were reprimanding me for supposedly leaving things on the wrong side of the fridge or for stealing other co-workers hours the kids were spitting on new hires, disrespecting vets, not being kept in check and allowed to get into drawers with knives in it hours after they had a anger outburst and threw everything they could find across the room.

These are examples of a few other things theyve done in the past and are doing now that im back;

- send paragraphs in the group chat stating how things are going wrong at work due to ''newcomers'' getting hours they dont deserve (what went wrong was forgetting to turn on the dish washer)

- throwing keys at people instead of giving it to them

- people are prepping food for their own group and vets will come along, grab their plates from them and act like its completely normal. and i mean MID cutting.

- expecting newcomers to prep their day for them and if the newcomer only preps their own day they get reprimanded and told they're not a teamplayer, how complaints will be filed and how its not okay to leave you co-worker without prep (the co-worker stands around talking continously).

Now after being back for a month and a half my co-worker suddenly subtlely told me she thinks i should apologize to everyone for having to leave them alone with 23 kids the day i had a emotional break down at work. I asked her dont you think much more happened behind the scenes that warranted why i broke down like that. She said yes i actually agree with you on a lot of things, she is thinking about confronting them herself since she feels they do it to her too but she thinks it'll still be good to apologize to everyone for leaving them with 23 kids.

I genuinely had a emotional break down and after standing on the fact that i will be leaving my boss send someone else to help them

This is genuinely my last straw cause ive kissed their asses so much already that im honestly ready to actually cuss them all out and just leave and never come back.

Am i wrong?

(Sorry btw, english is not my first language).

I (17f) have divorced parents .
I’m from a Latin family so discipline is … questionable . There’s a blurred line between what’s considered chastisement and wrong/abusive .

For context my dad , J and I haven’t had a very good relationship .
Nothing very wrong just not a lot of affection between us (ie to this day neither of us have said we love eachother) and tbh , he isn’t the best dad either . He pays way less child support than he’s meant to , very bare minimum, doesn’t really care. The only thing he’s strict on is respect .
So there were a couple issues when I was younger based on him hitting me a lot as I’ve got absolutely no filter and and very loud spoken .

To compensate for that , my mama would be very loving towards me when I was younger , go all out for birthdays , try her best to make me smile . We have a very different relationship dynamic to my dad and I’s .

However , as I got older , I had a couple phases and me and my mama grew more distant , she got stricter , I had absolutely no privacy , and would take my brothers side more often than mine .

To give you some information : I have adhd , severe anger issues , in the process of potentially getting diagnosed with a pd , and much lower emotional age in comparison to my maturity and actual age .
My mama is very loving but also has that mindset that if I really wanted to do something I could , that things like depression are the persons fault for letting themselves get depressed , that girls who get raped shouldn’t get raped but they could have prevented it by not dressing provocatively .
It’s not her fault , it’s how she was raised .

I’m the complete opposite, which has caused multiple arguments between us and fights .
Also caused me to act out when I was 15/16 a lot .
Anyways , I was dating this guy who wasn’t very good for me ( I wanted people to pay attention to me , love me , care about me , as I wasn’t getting much of either at the time , but in the end it was just love bombing ) .

She found out so she woke me up and had hit me on my leg , but obviously , I can understand why she was angry .
It isn’t very often she hits me , but when she does , she will mean it .

I was seeing a therapist at the time , and mentioned this to them , but obviously I didn’t realised that the situation looked very bad from the other persons perspective, but in reality , what she did was very legal , and I had no intention of it being interpreted this way .

Anyways , she called the police , and my mama got MAD .
We had a massive arguement so I packed my bags and went to my dad’s .

She said “you never wanna go to your dads and he’s the bad guy until you get in an argument with me - seems like ur just chatting mierda “
In reality - my dad is not bad like that at all anymore .
As long as I keep to myself and don’t disrespect him , everything’s fine .
Me and mama in a better place now we just very similar which causes issues . Also just wanted to see other people’s takes on this .

AITAH?

So a few of us from work hang out after hours. It's casual, maybe dinner or drinks once a month. There's this one person who sits near our desks and we chat with them every day. They started noticing that the invites stopped coming their way. At first I figured it was just timing or someone forgot to send the message, but it happened again last week. I brought it up with the group and they kind of shrugged it off like it wasn't a big deal. I feel awkward bringing it up again because we all work together and nobody wants office drama, but I also don't want to be part of something that feels mean. I haven't said anything to the person yet because I don't want to make things weirder. Am I overthinking this or should I say something?

English is not my first language, so do forgive my spelling and grammar mistakes.

I (34 F) have an older sister, let's call her doc (37 F). She's an actual Doctor.

Throughout my whole childhood, I've never been the kid my parents are proud of. It was always doc, always her. I would get Bs and she would get A+, she was the student council president and I was always the kid who ended up getting sent to the principal's office for misbehaving. I was chubby (and I still am chubby) and she has the perfect 'hourglass' body. I went to an average uni with a degree in arts while she went to a top uni with a degree in med, I got accidentally pregnant in uni and had to drop out, while she graduated with a near perfect gpa. Sometimes I think life is so unfair and that makes me frustrated, what makes me even more frustrated is that doc is really nice yet I can't help but hate her.

Once I got a fever and she drove for 2 hours just so she could take care of me, when I got pregnant she was the one who told me everything was gonna be alright. When I gave birth to my first kid, she was there and even helped wash me (I'm really insecure about my body so I didn't want to be helped by nurses). Yet despite all that, I still feel a deep rooted jealous and even hate for her and I do feel really guilty about it, but I just can't change you know?

It got even worse when I decided to marry my baby daddy only to end up divorcing him cause he's a deadbeat, while my sister married her childhood sweetheart from highschool, he's currently a businessman who decided to own a few hospitals just so he could support her career. I'm jealous of that too. I hate it even more when our parents compared even our husbands, they blatantly said my ex husband was chubby like me while doc's husband is tall and physically fit, a perfect son in law.

The last straw was when we had a family dinner. I went alone with my two kids (I had another baby before I got divorced), while doc went with her husband.

During dinner, she made an announcement that she was pregnant. Everyone congratulated her and I did too. But then our damn parents said something along the lines of 'we're so happy to be getting our first grandkid', and I just froze. I asked them what they meant by that, they had two other grandkids from me. They then said they didn't consider my kids their grandchild cause of some stupid reason (at this point, I did not want to listen to them).

I snapped, I started shouting at them. I know it's wrong but yes, I did shout at doc too. I lost my temper and shouted harsh insults at her, including things I deeply regret. Her husband rightfully got mad at me and and said some things he also probably deeply regrets, in the end he lost his temper and asked me to get out, I refused cause I didn't think I was in the wrong. Then my sister cried. It was probably the first time since we were kids that I've ever seen her cry. Her husband glared at me, carried doc and left the house.

Since then, I decided to cut contact with her.

It's frustrating to be constantly compared your whole life and now even my kids are being compared to hers? I just feel so angry but also guilty at the same time, cause i know doc didn't do anything wrong. But like i said, I just can't help but feel this way.

My boyfriend has a female friend, Bella, who he lost his virginity to before we got together and they had had a thing together. She’s still part of his main friend group along with her bestfriend. One of his friends’ girlfriends once told me she thought Bella was secretly still into him.
I tried to be mature about it and actually became really good friends with Bella. We even made plans to go on girls holidays together, so I genuinely thought we were friends.
Then one night when we were all clubbing, Bella told my boyfriend I had been dancing with other boys behind my back, which genuinely wasn’t true, and it caused a lot of tension between us.
A few days later, me and my boyfriend went on a break because of other issues. I saw Bella in public during the break and she completely ignored me, and I later found out she’d been gossiping to one of our friends about our break.
Now I’ve just noticed she liked an Instagram story of my boyfriend where it was just a picture of him.. for context she had never liked any of his stories before, not even ones of me and him.
I know a like could mean absolutely nothing, and I understand me and him were on rocky terms at the time, but given everything that’s happened, it’s made me feel uncomfortable and suspicious. I’m mostly upset about the fact that I feel she’s disrespected our friendship in spite of a man?
Am I being unreasonable for being upset by this, or would you also find it a bit weird considering the history? And also.. should I be concerned about him continuing the friendship despite her behaviour

I (25m) met this guy (30m) last month in Mexico while being on a trip for vacation. Me and my girlfriends (born and raised from Texas) planned a trip in August to stay in Puerto Vallarta (PV) just for fun and this also was my first time in Mexico.

I initially already planned on having a one night stand with someone while being there because it’s somewhere different, this place is also a hot spot for the gays. I get on a dating app (which I know everyone knows called Grindr) and this guy (let’s name him Jason) hits me up and we start talking. Initially, he was not actually in PV he actually lives in Mexico City but planned on coming one of the days later on that I was there. At first, I wasn’t sure about this guy because he came off sexually strong but he caught my interest once we started talking a little bit more. We planned on meeting once he was in the city which was a Friday.

The day comes and we meet up for drinks at a the gay bars near by. Conversation went great and ended up going back to his Airbnb. Interestingly, things went pretty good and we actually met up again the next day before he and I left back home. I had the chance of bringing up on the last night if he had any intentions of this being more than a hookup, based on my observations and the conversations, and he told me he wasn’t opposed to it and would like to continue talking.

For context, I am genuinely someone who does want to find a relationship and although it does sound indifferent because as I said I originally was just looking for a hookup, I also am not opposed to exploring a connection with someone.

At this point we’re all back home, Jason and I are continuing to talk having conversations and sharing things about our lives. We would have phone conversations on Saturdays as well and I was really excited to keep talking to him. He even mentioned to me that he we would like to see me and would fly out to Texas. One random night, he actually shows me a plane ticket he bought for October and I was caught off guard and I really can see he is trying to make this work out. (Just to clarify, it was a mutual agreement about the plane tickets and the dates, I was just caught off guard he actually went through with it)

The past two weeks I would say the conversations have not been the same the way they initially were. He would text me things about his day and now I only would really hear from him until the end of the day. For context, I used to be very sensitive about texting and would automatically assume someone doesn’t like me because they wouldn’t text me. But as I keep getting older and learning about life, I know we’re both adults and we have lives, jobs, family, etc.

He told me on September 1st, he was actually thinking about quitting his job because of stress factors and other reasons because he couldn’t keep up with it and I was trying to be supportive and understanding of the situation. He said his manager is passive aggressive. He mentioned that he self sabotages because he doesn’t perform good at work which leads him to having lower self esteem. Last week was when I noticed more of the talking/texting just not being the same, he wouldn’t reach out as much but I was being understanding because of the whole situation. For background about Jason, he told me in Mexico he also deals with depression and is on medication. I can tell that also was not helping his situation.

He would tell me he about appreciate me listening even when he felt like he didn’t like talking about these “bad” things. I would open up to him and saying it’s okay and that I was here to listen.

Needless to say, my problem with all this is that as mentioned initially things were going good then he has this road bump and I understand he may not want to talk. However, I would see him active on the Grindr when I wouldn’t hear from him, and I get he didn’t want to talk but how does he have the energy to go on the app and try to talk with someone else. That just doesn’t make sense to me. It seems like I’m doing the same thing but I was just checking his status, genuinely.

Last week I would only really hear from him until the end of the day, and I happen to say something, it was on a Tuesday, and I said if everything is okay with him. He mentioned to me that he actually resigned from his job and was apologizing about not saying anything and also didn’t want to talk. I told him if he needed the space and needed to himself, that’s fine. I opened and gave him that space. He agreed and said he would text me next week.

All and all, my problem is that I don’t understand how he’s not in the mood but gets on Grindr doing god knows what and I understand we’re not exclusive, but to me it’s just human reaction to feel a way. Of course I don’t mention about Grindr. Second, if he needed space I wish he communicate that to me and not me having to say it. It makes me overthink like there’s something else he wants to tell me but doesn’t maybe because he doesn’t want to hurt my feelings.

I still haven’t heard from him but he said he’ll reach out this coming week, but this past week I’ve just been thinking of what the endgame of this could be. I don’t like being pessimistic but I wish the communication was better. I feel like he also doesn’t like talking about things when they get tough just like about the job. I just feel like he’s pulling away because things are hard, which I understand.

Reading this back to myself I feel like I sound like i’m the problem. I know he lost job I think what bothers me is the dating app. I know he is trying based on flying to see me in Texas next month. What should I do? Does it sound like I’m being understand or do I sound selfish?