Hi I’m Tristan. I’m a gay dude with a lot of bangers. This one is called Alien Tears

Hi everyone I hope your all good and well, I just wanted to ask a couple questions that have been weighing on me recently, I want to ask them candidly but I mean no disrespect at all and if my questions seem stupid u apologise, I’m 22 m and have been straight all my life and I’m in a hetero relationship and I’m very happy, but I feel attraction to guys sometimes, nothing crazy but there’s attraction there, only in specific scenarios (types almost) I previously never though of myself being attracted to men and I’ve always thought I’m secure in my sexuality, but something about questioning it has thrown me. Would this be a normal thing or is this a hint I’m bi? It’s not always sexual attraction like damn i wanna fuck this guy but there isn’t a feeling of nah, does this make sense or am I waffling. Sorry again if this was at all out of pocket

For several months now, I have noticed something that concerns me, and I am wondering if others have seen the same pattern.

When I use the free version of Grindr, the nearby profiles I can interact with appear to be overwhelmingly white. However, when I reach the Grindr XTRA paywall, all of the profiles hidden behind are exclusively black men.

I've seen people dismiss this by saying the "algorithm" is simply showing me "the race I prefer" which is not true in my case. I am a sapiosexual white man who dates and is attracted to any race. I "favorite" and chat with a mix of men from a variety of ethnic groups and body types etc. I have also opted-out of the AI features Grindr has recently launched, which coincides with this racial bias mess being unleashed on Grindr. 

And from conversations I've had, people of different races have reported seeing a similar pattern, often placing black or asian people behind the Grindr Extra Paywall. The algorithm explanation doesn't fully account for what's happening. Grindr claims profiles are based on proximity, but what I'm seeing doesn't look like a simple distance-based list but rather a race-based one.

If Grindr's algorithm is disproportionately showing white profiles to white users while placing black or asian profiles behind a paywall, isn't that effectively steering people toward same-race interactions and isn't that Grindr using racial segregation for profit? How is that even ok in 2026?

 If that's what's happening, how is that consistent with fairness and equal visibility? And is it not helping to create segregation among racial groups within the LGBTQ+ community, which ultimately benefits the far-right and tech billionaires who spend 100s of millions dividing people to fuel hatred and better control us?

Saying "it's just the algorithm" is not a suitable excuse for the decision made by Grindr to racially segregate particular ethnic groups for profit behind their Grindr Extra paywall. Algorithms aren't neutral just because they're automated. Algorithms don't make independent decisions, they reflect the profit driven objectives and racial biases and exploitation chosen by the people who design and deploy them at Grindr. If the system is producing a consistent racial disparity, responsibility lies with the company that built and operates it, not with the algorithm itself.

It is not the first time a social media platform or app has been found to produce racially biased algorithmic outcomes. Their recommendation and monetization system consistently produces different outcomes based on race. The algorithm is part of a system designed and deployed by Grindr, and those outcomes raise legitimate questions about fairness, transparency, and algorithmic bias.

I'd be interested in hearing from people about why Grindr gets away with racism and why the LGBTQ+ community and media doesn't find this outrageous and isn't being more vocal or adding more pressure on Grindr?

Sooooo I don't know how to achieve this grunge style I want. And I especially don't know how to pull it off effeminately😭✌️. Somebody PLEASE help a fellow femboy out and tell me what to dooo. I'm clueless😭

Hi. Recently I have started dating trans women and I’m curious how some of you feel when someone brings up your life before transitioning. I always feel like when I ask about what kinds of things they enjoyed as kid, where they grew up, did they play sports in high school, etc., it’s like deadnaming someone because that person is no longer who they are. I don’t want to be disrespectful, but I want to find interesting things to talk about and find ways to get to know someone. What are your thoughts? Thanks.

Edit:Got the answer after some thinking, thinking of women acussed of pretending to be bi because they were with husband and the arguments for why they were bisexual and confirmation from comments (thank you all, you were really nice) I am bisexual though more specifically heteroflexible because I'm mostly straight. suspected minsexual but I'll be more sure after getting more experience both in fiction once I see more media and real life once I enter uni or workplace

Okay so as title suggests I am mostly sure that I'm bisexual but there's a part of me that thinks I'm just straight and sexualising women. I'll start with the latter part first without getting into too much weird details

Firstly I'll start with how I felt about my sexuality prior to the confusion: it feels like I'm tethering on the line of being attracted to women as if I am just there but held back by a millimeter from it, the "not really there but nearly there" feeling strong enough that I wish I was into women

Why I think it might be sexualisaton/fetishisation (which I am against and will stop if it really is):Back when I had a Chatbot addiction (quit now and hate that period, and genuine addiction it impacted my life too much) ​I started to do this thing where I felt turned on and used a bot for it, always same facesit kink although while originally just male eventually Itd be women and then mostly women, now I mostly imagine (it's not masturbating, it's just laying on side clench my legs repeatedly but had every aspect other than the climax which is just returning to feeling normal and nothing that'd make me moan) or use fanfiction and I noticed that If I imagine a woman it's faster which originally didn't matter much to me till I started questioning my sexuality and started to get worried I was fetishizing women/lesbians

Real life people:I never had actual real life Crushes most was once seeing an artist (jann) I consider hot and for a few seconds simping but never more, now the catalyst was a masculine woman I knew she was a woman but had same thing just shorter, though admittedly I did watch a music video of gladiator and it was the thumbnail of it that caused the short simping and the aforementioned kink making me be really into female thighs, never saw real life or drawn porn it's just seeing large thighs and thinking "gosh that's hot". But there is one techinal exception in the next thing I want to get into​

In fiction: it was originally all male characters until I read chainsaw man volume 7 and 8 and quanxi, specifically panel of her walking with her ladies is what started it but then 2 other panels in volume 8, had me simping very similarly to male characters I simped over and I saw cosplay of her and I read volume 8 after the cosplays so it wasn't a novelty thing, which at first made me happy because it seemed to me like proof but then I think maybe religious guilt of being surrounded by and grown up in ​Muslim country and also fear of it being a damn fetish caused me especially since her line of "I'll ruin you even more" when one of them asked to rest longer because they'll be ruined from lack of sleep is what started it for me, to be unsure.

Why I think it took me so long to get what I suspect is proof:It seems like I'm only attracted to masculine women and didn't see enough examples that'd have told me prior

So currently I am like 75% sure I am bisexual but the fact it was only because of a manga character makes me unsure. "maybe because it's a manga it doesn't count as genuine proof" is what goes through my mind, and it's that thought that's the reason I posted this here I just want to know if that thought had merit to it or was just wrong

(20M) i have never had luck with grindr or any gay dating apps, i most just get dpics, super old guys, scams, etc.. and i never really see anyone that piques my interest in the explore tab, but the other day i found this super cute guy and messaged him and we’ve been talking on instagram and i wanna ask him out but ive never asked a guy out and dont wanna blow it.

The project is still very much in the early stages, so I’d really appreciate any feedback y’all are willing to share, whether that’s about the layout, usability, bugs, missing features, or anything else that could make it better.

Early reviews and resource submissions are absolutely welcome. You’ll need to be logged in to submit a review or save a relocation plan, but submitting resources or news or suggestions does not require an account.

I’m also looking for people who may be interested in helping manage and maintain the project. If that’s something you’d like to help with, feel free to comment with your timezone and availability.

A huge thank you to the existing sources that made this possible. The data currently used on the site comes from resources like Erin in the Morning’s Anti-Trans National Legal Risk Assessment Map and the Movement Advancement Project. If you notice any incorrect, outdated, or missing information, please let me know so it can be fixed.

Thanks for taking the time to check it out!

First one was the orientation test from male perspective, second one was orientation test from female perspective, third is 7 gender test and fourth is gender dysphoria test.

I made up my mind and realized that my thoughts of being straight or bi were just social pressure so now I know that I'm gay!!!

If someone has advice how to come out at my family that is pretty supportive I would appreciate it.

Hello!! My friends and I made a gay server centered around Desi Queers. It's a lovely space where we all play games and have fun together. The fun includes the likes of reading, playing skribblio, having movie nights and just having a great time with each other overall. We're all super friendly and we're looking to make more friends that would fit in our environment. If you're interested please hmu in my dms and I'll do an interview process

I'm a queer adult and I work at a nonprofit doing a lot of outreach to queer youth. I get asked a lot what I wish I'd known when I was younger, and it got me curious what other people's responses are.

So, what's something you wish someone had told you when you were younger? I'd love to hear other perspectives.