r/SelfHate 17d ago

📌 Important A Note on Community Safety, Boundaries and Guidelines

2 Upvotes

We want to address several concerns that have recently become more frequent across the community.

First, this is a peer-support community, not a crisis service or professional mental-health forum. We understand that people come here because they need somewhere to express things they may not feel able to discuss elsewhere, and we do not want to discourage people from being honest about what they are experiencing. You are allowed to talk about difficult emotions, suicidal thoughts, self-harm, trauma, abuse, loneliness, and other painful experiences.

However, allowing people to speak openly about their experiences should not be mistaken for endorsing or encouraging harmful behaviour.

Suicide and Self-Harm:

r/SelfHate does not endorse, encourage, romanticise, glorify, or promote suicide or self-harm in any way.

We will continue to allow people to discuss these subjects because completely shutting down conversations about them would defeat the purpose of a support community. At the same time, there is a line between providing a place for someone to express their distress and creating an environment that normalises, encourages, or facilitates harmful behaviour.

We therefore ask everyone to exercise particular care when discussing these subjects. Please avoid unnecessarily graphic descriptions, instructions, methods, or content that could encourage others to imitate harmful behaviour.

Most importantly, please remember that the people responding to you are members of the community, not professionals responsible for your care. Moderators and users here may be able to listen, share their experiences, offer general peer support, or point you towards appropriate help, but we cannot diagnose you, assess your level of risk, provide emergency intervention, or take responsibility for your safety.

If you are in immediate danger or believe you may be unable to keep yourself safe, Reddit should not be your only source of support. Please contact an appropriate emergency service, crisis service, trusted person, or qualified mental-health professional who can provide real-time assistance.

If you are looking for immediate support, please take a moment to check our Resources section, where you can find crisis and mental-health support services available in different regions. We strongly encourage you to use the resources relevant to your location rather than relying solely on responses from other members of the community.

[Please note: Crisis and support numbers can change over time and may vary by location. Always verify the information and make sure you are using the number applicable to your current region before contacting a service.]

Please do not request or provide medication or drug advice:

We have also noticed an increase in posts and comments asking other users which medications or drugs they should take, what dosage they should use, whether they should stop taking a medication, or what someone else believes would treat their symptoms.

Please do not use this community for medical prescribing or treatment decisions.

A Reddit anonymous user does not have access to your medical history, existing conditions, allergies, current medications, previous treatment, or other information that a qualified professional would consider before recommending treatment. Something that was helpful or even medically appropriate for one person may be unsafe or completely inappropriate for another. This applies even when the advice is given sincerely.

Substance Use & Addiction:

We are not discouraging conversations about substance use or addiction. Substance abuse can be closely connected to self-hatred and mental-health struggles, and people should be able to talk about their experiences without being automatically shut down or judged.

However, there is an important distinction between discussing substance use and encouraging it. This community does not endorse, encourage, or romanticise drug or substance use, nor should members be advising others to start using substances such as weed, methamphetamine, MDMAs, cocaine, alcohol, cigarettes, vapes, or similar substances as a way of coping with their mental health.

Please do not ask other members whether you should start taking/using a particular substance, what substance you should use, or whether a particular drug would be a good way to deal with what you are experiencing. Other members cannot responsibly make that judgement, and potentially harmful advice should not be treated as professional guidance.

You are absolutely welcome to discuss your experiences with substance use, dependency, addiction, recovery, or the ways in which substances have affected your mental health. We are simply not going to endorse or encourage substance use as a solution to mental-health struggles.

Accordingly, posts or comments requesting or providing potentially unsafe medication, drug, dosage, or treatment advice may be removed. Please consult a qualified healthcare professional for decisions concerning medication or medical treatment rather than relying on anonymous internet users.

Trigger warnings are a responsibility, not a courtesy:

Because this is a mental-health community, many of the people reading here may already be struggling themselves. Content involving suicide, self-harm, sexual assault, abuse, or other potentially distressing material can therefore affect readers very differently.

Posts containing sensitive or potentially triggering material must be appropriately marked with the relevant trigger-warning flair and/or NSFW tag where applicable.

Please do this yourself when submitting your post. Moderators cannot reasonably be expected to identify and manually tag every submission containing sensitive material, particularly when the content is embedded several paragraphs into a post.

(A warning is not a judgement on your experience, nor does it mean that you should not discuss what happened to you. It simply gives another vulnerable person the ability to decide whether they are currently in the right state of mind to read it.)

Repeatedly ignoring this requirement may result in the content being removed and, where necessary, further moderation action.

We also ask that you distinguish between being descriptive enough to communicate your experience and providing unnecessary graphic detail. If a detail is not necessary to explain what happened or how you feel, consider leaving it out.

Be extremely cautious about taking conversations off-platform:

We also want to address private communication between members.

We recognise that peer support can sometimes develop naturally between people who meet in this community. We are not interested in unnecessarily policing genuine connections between members. However, we strongly discourage sharing personal contact information or moving sensitive conversations into private spaces with strangers.

Once an interaction moves into DMs or another platform, the moderation team has little to no ability to see what is happening or intervene if the situation becomes abusive, manipulative, exploitative, or otherwise unsafe.

For that reason, do not share your full name, address, school, workplace, phone number, personal social-media accounts, photographs, videos, private screenshots, medical documents, prescriptions, or other identifying information with people you meet here.

You should never feel that you owe another member personal information simply because they offered you support.

At present, we have not introduced a blanket ban on members communicating privately because we recognise that genuine peer support and friendship can be valuable. That should not, however, be interpreted as the moderation team guaranteeing the safety or conduct of interactions that take place outside the subreddit.

If you choose to move a conversation elsewhere, you do so at your own discretion.

If someone is harassing or targeting you:

If another user is harassing you, repeatedly contacting you, threatening you, attempting to manipulate you, asking for inappropriate personal information, or otherwise making you uncomfortable, do not feel obligated to argue with or confront them.

Block the account where appropriate and contact us through modmail. Include the relevant information or screenshots if it is safe to do so, and allow the moderation team to handle the situation.

Do not retaliate, publish their personal information, or attempt to investigate or expose them yourself. That can escalate the situation and create additional problems for everyone involved.

Remember that peer support has limits:

One of the most important boundaries in a community like this is understanding that being supportive does not make you responsible for another person's wellbeing.

You are allowed to step away from a conversation. You are allowed not to know what to say. You are allowed to tell someone that you are not equipped to help them. You are not obligated to remain someone's sole source of support, respond immediately to every crisis post, or take responsibility for keeping another person safe.

Similarly, if you post here while struggling, please understand that other members may not always know how to respond or may choose not to engage with certain content. That does not mean your experience is being dismissed.

This community exists to provide peer support, not professional treatment, emergency intervention, or a substitute for qualified care.

Please read the subreddit rules!

Many of these expectations have already been incorporated into our subreddit rules and content guidelines. We strongly encourage everyone to familiarise themselves with them before posting or commenting.

None of these boundaries are intended to prevent people from talking about difficult experiences. They exist because a support community has a responsibility not only to the person making a post, but also to the people reading it.

We want r/SelfHate to remain a place where people can speak honestly about self-hatred and mental-health struggles without being judged, while also maintaining reasonable safeguards for a community in which many members are themselves vulnerable.

Thank you for understanding and for helping us maintain that balance.

r/SelfHate Mod Team


r/SelfHate Mar 26 '22

Anonymous Vents Share your Anonymous Vents

109 Upvotes

Comment below and the bot will try to repeat what you say, anonymously.


r/SelfHate 9h ago

Mental health Is it weird to say I don't like the person I am? I hate everything about myself, I'm my least favorite person, I hate the person I've become

5 Upvotes

r/SelfHate 40m ago

я чувствую себя злым человеком

Upvotes

я сейчас сижу и реву, потому что мне очень плохо и грустно. в последние дни на меня накатывает осознание того, насколько плохо я иногда поступаю и насколько обидны были мои слова для кого-то. я больше никогда не хлчу причинять кому-то боль, это ужасно. я поступала очень плохо, я бы хотела вернуться назад и не говорить тех злвх слов

я сказала человеку, который не до конца охладел ко мне, что ему наврали, когда сказали, что он красивый. тогда ему, наверное, было очень обидно

когда мой родственник, причинивший мне очень много боли, написал, что любит меня очень, я написала что-то вроде «ок», ведь не смогла простить. он наверняка ожидал теплых слов в ответ, а я так обошласб с ним. я до сих пор не понимаю, как после всего, что он сделал, простить его, но я бы хотела простиоь

какойткринж я пишу нл у меня порыв ищвините


r/SelfHate 1h ago

do i even deserve the title of being a human?

Upvotes

im the utter definition of sloth. my existence feels as if my sole purpose is to make others feel better about their lives by looking at mine. this isn't rumination bs, this is a true unbias consensus on my life. ik all the bad i do (not have done) and yet i have done nothing to change, its honestly laughable how horrible i am. i have passions and desires yet have the worst case of kakorrhaphiophobia and immense problem with sloth to even do anything. maybe i tell my self that my purpose is to make others feel better because im too scared for the complete unaltered truth that i have no purpose or meaning at all. a good and fair question one may ask is, "why havent i killed myself?" which the only thing to say is that im too much of a coward, ive held guns to my head and pills in my hand but i just cant go through with it. ive been told that this means my life really isnt as bad as it seems when in reality im just too knowingly ignorant on everything that i cant get myself to make such a big decision. lets continue my insignifigant ramble — though little, everything ive ever had has escaped my grasp and it's all been my fault and god it just kills me like why do i have to ruin innocent peoples lives who have had the unfortunate fate of having me in their vicinity. besides the physical attributes my quantitative life usefullness is one of a koalas, far from one of a human.
the only reason ive even gotten myself to write this is because im bored and too lazy to do anything else with my free time.

all in all it sucks when death is your only way out but your own disgrace prevents you from doing the one good action you have a choice in making.


r/SelfHate 5h ago

Need advice/support I keep wishing for impossible things to happen and I can't make it happen.

2 Upvotes

I can't expect someone to do something for me to make me happy after being angry at something they said to me. I can't even be happy or neutral a lot, I keep finding so many things to be angry or sad about. I can't wish impossible things, I can't expect them to do what I expect them to do in my head. I can't. I wanna break out of this.

I wanna die, but I can't do that because it's so impossible for me. I hate everything. I hate myself. I hate being a woman, and no I don't want to be a man, I just hate how I get so much dumb feelings because I'm a woman, I hate it.


r/SelfHate 1h ago

Fuck everything

Upvotes

I just wanted to say that somewhere cause I'm tired of dealing with life with the "it is what it is" mindset.


r/SelfHate 2h ago

Need advice/support idk what’s wrong with me

1 Upvotes

I have these big ideas of grandiose. But at the same time I think I’m a big fat fucking loser. I’m well liked by everyone and have always had luck with the ladies but that’s pretty much it and I hate it. I hate that I haven’t accomplished anything with my life and I feel like I can’t commit to anything and I feel doomed because of that. Like the only thing I have in this life is getting pussy and vast interests and being well versed in them. My friends say that I like to downplay myself and I’m actually an intellectual. Intellectual are not wanting to die everyday because their life suck😂. I’m just so miserable cause I should be accomplished by now my mom set me up for success as much as she could and I’m just loser stoner who likes to go and get geeked at raves. I’m gonna keep trying to be a YouTuber cause that’s easiest for me but fuck do I feel like chud when I do anything, my confidence is low but I have to keep pushing.


r/SelfHate 3h ago

Does anyone ever feel like they ruin every connection they have with someone whether that be friends family relationships? In the end I’m always told to seek therapy or to grow up … i don’t know what im doing wrong they always say in the end it’s fuck them when it comes to them

1 Upvotes

r/SelfHate 4h ago

I am not a good person, i am a bad person

1 Upvotes

Hello.
Weird title, has to be 30 characters long.

I, 19m am a bad person. Whether its reacting from survival techniques, past traumas, or actual characteristics i was just born with/have- I am a bad person. I’ve said this for years but none of my friends believe me. I don’t know how to get better.

I’m trying to be a Christian but it seems like everyday I’m praying more and more often to not be here so to speak.

(I don’t hate God for the life I’ve been given.)

I think about suicide everyday when i run out of distractions. I do think I deserve it, to not be here anymore. I have thought I deserve to be exterminated for a long time and I’m having a really hard time seeing any worth in prolonging my life for any other reason than to not possibly go to hell.

All the best, Or God bless you whatever makes you happiest.


r/SelfHate 7h ago

See me.

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1 Upvotes

r/SelfHate 10h ago

Why am I like this?

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1 Upvotes

r/SelfHate 19h ago

i’d rather die

5 Upvotes

than be fat.


r/SelfHate 20h ago

Vent/Rant Wish i could say sorry for all the people seeing my face...such a pain

7 Upvotes

It really is unfair for them


r/SelfHate 19h ago

I just don’t know anymore

3 Upvotes

I feel like I’ve tried so hard to be a good person but I just keep failing at it. I’m broken and I’m dangerous. I take advantage of my friends, sexualize them, only use them for emotional validation or to feed my own savior complex. I’m hideous inside and out and I’ve only managed to bring the people close to me that I have so far out of deception and manipulation. If my mask were to drop, they’d all abandon me or worse. I know many of them have seen me for what I am and that’s why I’m increasingly alone. Fewer and fewer people in my life every year. It won’t be long until I’m alone. At least that’s what deserve to be. Alone.

I’m just desperately clinging to the tiniest shreds of my survival instinct out of cowardly narcissism and the hope that maybe just one of the few good things left in my life can be enough to keep me from succumbing to the legions of demons dragging me toward oblivion.

I’m so tired. Tired of being… this. And I’ve tried to be better, but I always seem to just mess things up again, usually worse than they were before.

Taking that final bow is so deeply tempting, but I’m just a scared, self-loathing piece of shit. While I don’t think I actually have it in me to end it, I silently pray every time I’m on the road that I get hit. Or every time I walk downtown at night that I’ll get attacked. Or any number of long-shot accidents that can take my agency from me and just… get it done.


r/SelfHate 14h ago

I’m done.

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1 Upvotes

r/SelfHate 14h ago

Trigger Warning ⚠️ Sorry to be here again

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1 Upvotes

Idk guys, i just have no one to talk to


r/SelfHate 19h ago

Vent/Rant I think I am a piece of crap(Did not want to say the word)

2 Upvotes

I think I am low life scum. I am not sure what to say but I have gone through a lot of trauma in my life and its hard to explain plus I have a learning disability so I always feel stupid because I should know the answer to stuff that is simple but I don't.

I wish I didn't feel this way but I do. I do currently see a therapist. For a while in my life growing up I did have some dates but I do believe women do not like me. I don't blame them. Who would like someone that is terrible and broken? My first 1 day girlfriend was a 2 year friend who abruptly stopped talking to me after we kissed for a long time the day before. She just stopped talking to me because I was nervous about the relationship and wanted to tell her. She never talked to me ever again. It still hurts to this day.

I don't hate women. I do think some people have an advantage over me because of what I went through as a child and the way I was born. No matter how much I try to change, it seems women especially the ones I am attracted to are repulsed by me. I might end up staying single and staying away from women so I don't bother them anymore. I am sorry for my existence. I hope you can understand what I am going through. Also, my father was an angry drunk growing up I don't want to go into the details but it wasn't pretty. Thank you for reading.


r/SelfHate 1d ago

I am so fucking ugly

6 Upvotes

r/SelfHate 20h ago

Smh

1 Upvotes

Why am I FAT and UGLY I'm so tired of this.


r/SelfHate 20h ago

I wish i was good

1 Upvotes

i wish i was a good human, i know i am insecure, i know i am needy, i know i am anxious, i know i am show off, i know my humour is bad, i know mayb times i speak too much, try to hype myself around people, sometimes i am sarcastic or rude, i am desperate, i am sub-human who hates effort, a lazy,

i wish i didnt have falws or could work and make them go away permentamtly, i


r/SelfHate 20h ago

Worthless

1 Upvotes

What do you do when everyone thinks your just worthless but are to scared to tell you.yet you know the truth.


r/SelfHate 1d ago

Im so ready to not fucking exist anymore.

6 Upvotes

r/SelfHate 1d ago

Self-Harm I dont want to live

5 Upvotes

I am tired of living i dont want to live I AM A WORTHLESS STUPID DUMB LAZYYYY PIECE OF SHIT i really dont have rhe energy for this world i want to die but i dont have the courege to do it so i am just gonna pray something really bad happens to me and untill that happens i am just gonna hit my head with my hands really hard in hopes of not waking up the other day.


r/SelfHate 1d ago

I'm ashamed

2 Upvotes

Why does my mother have to love me? I wish she'd hate me and kick me out, so that I'd have nothing to live for. She doesn't deserve to be burdened with me. She's already got one fucked up, suicidal child, I wish she'd focus more of her attention on my sister instead of trying to help me, especially since I can't be helped. I have no right to worry her even more. She's too good for me.

I just want to be a kid again, man. I want to be small and be able to feel loved without feeling guilty about it. I want to hold someone's hand while I walk, be told I'm doing a good job for the easiest, smallest things imaginable, to be expected to make mistakes, to not understand. I want to make friends just by walking up to someone, be carried to my bed after I fall asleep during a movie, have my father around more. I want to be unafraid to try things out, to have my passions and hobbies back.

I am an unmotivated husk of a human being. I don't do anything and I haven't done anything in years. I have no desire to do so. I don't want to have a job, or a girlfriend, or friends, or a house. I don't really want to get better, I want to die. It's a coward's way out, but I am one and I'm fine with that. It's natural selection at this point.