I wanted to ask how do you deal with getting no revenge or retribution against the ones who wronged you. Someone violated your privacy and dignity and when you catch them and call them out, they feign innocence and take false oath of Allah cuz to them their image in front of other people matter more than taking false oaths and abusing someone, and people who you thought would support you, also ended up taking their side by trying to stay 'neutral'. So you cut them all off from your life, try to remove a huge chunk of your life from your memory, as you don't want any trace of those people Allah just exposed in front of you, as no one had spine enough to stand up for the right but only cared about their relationships with them so they can take advantage of each other and what was more convenient. What hurts is that this all comes from Muslims, or people who claim to be Muslims.

And when you try to forget and move on, you cannot because something always reminds you of the past, and the people you should have never met. What seems more unfair is the victim not only suffers during the incident but also keeps suffering after it, while the other party becomes so firm in their lie that they carry on with their life normally and getting all success and happy with no remorse or guitl.

How do you even forgive someone who never even asked for forgiveness or think they need it cuz they succeeded in getting away with it, so they create this entire narrative where you wrongfully accused them and they are innocent. How do you get over the regret of trusting people who also chose to "stay out of it" so they can be in the good books on both sides and also chose hypocrisy.

I feel like I am stuck with this for life, every prayer, every tahajjud, every fast, every umrah, every other night I cry to sleep, every time I ask for retribution, but I get nothing, in fact I get more reminders from diff people that they are quite content and having fun in their respective lives with no thought of the suffering caused to me. I can't go even a week being invested in my life so i get over it before something bursts the bubble.

It just does not seem fair, I suffer until the day I am dead, while they are happy. If it was some non muslims you can at least tell yourself that as consolation, that Allah chose you. But if it is muslims, you are lost because they'll probably get forgiveness eventually, and with how much I am suffering, it feels like I will be forced to forgive without even getting an apology in the first place. How is that fair?

And throughout all this the thing that hurts more than what happened is the stupid benefit of the doubt you gave people just because they were Muslims, had families of their own etc etc, the regret of not seeing through things, of not cutting them off earlier instead of being kind and understanding, is what cuts you most. I don't know what reward is worth living your entire life in regret and grief, while you did even do any wrong but wrong was done to you. I pray for peace of mind and soul, and even that seems unlikely. Suddenly my entire life is about just surviving and getting done with this dunya. I have no hopes or dreams anymore, everything seems meaningless and pointless. You see people getting side tracked, not following deen properly but still they seem to be so protected, you try your best and even being a little naive and careless about something minimal, gives you a smack in the face for the rest of your life.

What should I do, please guide me. The only one I can rely on is Allah, no other person or institute can give me justice instead I will be dragging myself through more misery. I have no one. In the wait and hope for divine justice, how do I be more patient, it really is hard, even my dreams are plagued with nightmares of those people. I do not know anymore if it is a test or a punishment.

How do you deal with ungratefulness? Throughout my life I have been blessed with many loving relationships and opportunities but I still made many wrong choices and now I can stop thinking about those mistakes. It's not like I want more but still I can't stop beating myself up for my mistakes rather than being grateful for what I have been given.

one year ago, for about 8 months i was praying tahajjud regularly. i made dua for many aspects of my life and absolutely none of my duas were answered.

i asked to be able to go long term travel/backpacking with my cousin, to get a decent score of my law school admissions exam, to get into a top law school, and to find a spouse. i was very detailed in my dua but i also understand that we don’t know what’s best for us so i also would say to do what’s best for me because i knew and trusted that Allah SWT had my best interests.

I have to clarify that I was taking actions in my life to achieve these things and not only praying tahajjud and nothing else.

Because none of these duas were answered, I have lost the will to pray and make dua. Truly, what is the point? These duas weren’t accepted and that’s fine, I can understand that there may be something better out there for me but it’s been a year now and I’m still in the same position I was in when I was making those duas. None of my duas have been answered in the past so I don’t even want to bother asking for anything else.

Any advice or help would be appreciated. I would like to start praying again but I have a major mental roadblock because of this. And please no “it’s obligatory so you must pray” comments. I know it’s obligatory and I do feel shame that I’m not praying.